GTA: The Magic Mystery Heist

by dereturd

Rating: teen
Tags: Other, Starlight Glimmer, Adventure, Equestria Girls, Sunset Shimmer, Main 7 (EqG), Profanity, Violence, Principal Celestia, Crossover, Dark, Human, Narcotics, Grand Theft Auto
Length: 1999

A CEO, a biker, a Gunrunner, and a VIP strike a heist in the one and only, Canterlot City, they better hope it ends in a way less than violent.

A biker club president of an illicit business, a CEO of an organization of SecuroServ with special vehicle warehouses, a Gunrunner/Smuggler, with secret headquarters and military hangars, smuggling contraband across the state, and a VIP owning a military/government facility with the needs to contain a ‘Doomsday Scenario’, all together to make a strike in Canterlot City’s big storyline.

This will be hard for them, and will not be good for the protagonists of CHS.

just a story about GTA:Online crossing over with MLP, to just have fun around the fundamentals and elements of the series

Published 2018-03-24 07:10:07 UTC
Last updated 2018-03-24 07:10:07 UTC

Prologue: The Magic Mystery Heist

“ID?” The security guard stated. The other guard inside the booth was assessing the situation. It’s not really worth anything, but it meant something as he was looking at an armored Karin Kurama with 3 men inside, one wearing a combat mask with two filters protruding from the jaws, one with a futuristic combat helmet with two sandy tan visors, and one with night vision goggles. All of them while wearing armored equipment. When the window went down the gas masked one said that they’re bringing in cargo for the military at Canterlot City. The military doesn’t usually send in packages from outside the city, and when they do, they usually get informed first.

The man complied and took out his ID. Giving them a benefit of a doubt, the guard inspected it. The picture and name looks validated, but he took out his laser scanner and hovered through the barcode, immediately responding with a good beep. He nodded, the man retracting his ID back. He knew the men had level 3 access, higher than your average level of power, yet he felt urged to check the cargo. Which he did.

He went to the trunk, the lock unlocked, he pulled up the door. There were three care packages, two long ones on the too and one big cube below the two. Still, he had doubts, so he opened one to see if its true. The guard met in the package a man, armored and masked like the rest, except wearing an armored military riot helmet, aiming at him with a marksman pistol.

BANG! BANG!

Two gunshots resonated from the distance, one hit the security guard and the other hitting the other guard inside the booth, revealing a bullet hole on the glass. The gas mask one immediately took out his vintage pistol as well when the container opened, and, coincidentally, both men shot at the same time. The gas mask one got out of the car immediately and rushed inside the booth, towards the computer. He deleted all traces of the recent act they did, and grabbed both bodies then stuffed them inside the nearby locker.

“Well, that would’ve gone better.” The man wearing the night vision goggles said.

“Agreed.” The door slammed shut when the riot helmeted man went inside.

“I really wish we had our stuff right now!” The one with the futuristic combat helmet said, enraged.

“Well we can’t help it James, it’ll be after three days ‘till we get our stuff.”

James titled his head. “What?” Still, his voice had little rage in him. “No one told me that!”

“Then I guess you weren’t paying attention when Lester was debriefing.”

“Oh for fucks sake..” James mumbled.

“Herald is right.” The gas masked one pointed towards the night vision driver. “We’ll have to wait and settle in before we can continue with the real stuff.”

“Riiight, ‘cause our first setup I heard—was A FUCKING SCHOOL RECON!”

The car sped immediately, slamming the people in the back towards their seats. After what seemed to be moments of speed, they skidded violently to a stop before a not-so-busy intersection.

“Please..shut up.” Herald huffed.

“Connor, where’s our place again?” The gas mask asked. Looking towards the man wearing the riot helmet. Said person shuffled through his pockets until his hand met with the hard object. He grabbed and unlocked it immediately, showing where he left off, the location of their safehouse.

“Uh Koenig.. go left. Stay straight after two rights, then turn right.” Connor instructed, Herald gassing the car and turning to their instructed route.

With that, the city of Canterlot finally gets a visit from the country’s most violent. Everyone will not be prepared, especially the students of Canterlot High.

“Haha! And here I thought, that the intro itself was worse!” The orange skinned girl chuckled, as she pushed the door that ringed open. The bells echoing through, as she and her friend exit the cafe. She took her first step outside, then sipped another through her frappe while maintaning eye contact with her pal.

“Yeah Sunset, I don’t wanna remember that.. makes me cringe.” She said, still havkng a smile. She stopped before a pedestrian lane, pushing the red button beside her, as the stoplight went red, with a timer of 60 seconds clocking. Both took their steps and continued talking.

“I agree with you Starlight, I felt the cringe as well when you..” Sunset paused, feeling her gut being a little twisted.

“Pfft, Ah! I really wanna scream right no-“

ZOOM!

“AAH!” Both girls shrieked when the vehicle sped past them, almost hitting them. The car’s engine still echoing its roar across the street.

“Ass!” Sunset yelled angrily, raising her fist towards the way the car went.

“Whoa whoa, Faust, calm down!” Starlight reassurred, pulling her away from the lane and to the other sidewalk, where their feet had step foot on.

“Who speeds that fast in this city? I mean that was a fast turn when the road is going right, but Jesus, there’s people walking down the street!” Sunset, still glaring where the car went.

“Hey look, if we see that car again, maybe we’ll report it. Does that calm you down?” Starlight again reassured, Sunset taking in deep breaths before facing her friend again.

“You’re..you’re right. Maybe next time.” Although she herself could not even remember what the car looked like, as that thing was fast as those racing cars themselves. Then, the duo continued walking towards Sunset’s place.

When the said duo left the scene, a bunch of police cars sped by as well, going where the car was at too.

The Kurama’s engine revved to a slow fade, before completely being void. The four dropped off on a dark alleyway, with a door on the left building. Said four quickly got out of the vehicle and separated. Connor and Herald opened the trunk while James and Koenig kept watch for the pursuing cops.

“Yeah, the cops in this city do not fuck around.” Connor mumbled, taking out the second package from its container.

“Let’s keep a low profile for now, shall we?” Herald replied, carrying the first package while opening the door. Both immediately went through the other side and into the darkness.

Koenig lightly gasped. “Get down, get down!” He repeated, James followed as both retracted back slightly into the shadows. After doing so, a collection of police cars sped through the street, all the while with sirens blaring. Even though the police here are more aware, they’re still retarded, like the others.

“You’re goddamn right.” James remarked, hearing what Koenig told himself. James got back to his feet, joining the others who are hauling the last package through the door. He turned to still see Koenig on lookout, he scoffed, shook his head, and went through the door.

It took a while before Koenig went back inside. He went through the door and closed it behind him. Studying his surroundings, he was inside an empty room that is still being built. It’s look remarks that of a vehicle warehouse, their sleeping quarters were up the stairs, which is actually the living room.

Koenig went up the last steps before looking at it himself. It’s a usual rundown room. The kitchen down further while a dining table was beside an empty bar. There was another stairs leading up, he immediately walked up again, before seeing four separate doors. One on the right, two on the left, and one going straight. The floor was the usual wooden cover, with a color of brown shading it. He opened the nearest door to him, the left.

He was met with the same floor, but had lockers meant for guns. He saw two metal cabinets, presumably for the armor. Then there was a wardrobe installed in the wall, it’s length is the entire room, with two sliding doors covering it. When he opened said doors, it was four equally spaced areas exactly for them. Koenig left the room and went across it, being met with a very clean white bathroom. The room itself is quite large, not too small not too big. Black streaks across the room, complimented with some parallel patterns. A long bathtub at the end of the room while a sink placed beside the door, and the toilet resting near said sink.

Koenig returned and went to the leftmost door at the end, revealing a very comfortable couch, with a 42 inch Smart TV that sat in front of the couch. Between the two thing was a small coffee table, glass and had the feature to spin, as that what Koenig just inspected. He returned outside and went to the last door, he opened the lights, and revealed a large room, filled with four separate beds, having integrated beside them were some bedside cabinets. An office chair and a table rested at the other side of the room.

“Hmph, it’s satisfactory.” He commented.

“Holy shit, this place sucks!” He heard Connor exclaim behind him, who threw his arms upwards into the air, gesturing what he said.

“Hey man, with Lester, he’s trying to find the best one he can get. For the mission and for our likes.” Herald spoke and popped out beside Connor.

“Where’s James?” Koenig asked.

“He’s busy setting up shop down in the garage.” Connor replied.

“Tell him his Shotaro can wait, Pegasus won’t reach this area and-“

“WOO HOO!”

“What the fuck..” Connor mumbled. The trio went downstairs immediately to find the front door left open. They went through the door to find James wrapping his arms around said purple Shotaro.

“EAT THIS LOS SANTOS!” He yelled, starting up the bike then accelerated forward into the city. With the trio watching and very much, shaking their heads.

“Yeah.. we have to get him before the people here find us suspicious.” Herald blurted, as James then went out of view but the neon properties of his bike, with his voice still resonating from the distance.

“Fucking dammit.” Koenig facepalmed.

“Well,” The trash can’s lid opened as the plastic cup fell through. “I better get back home. Been a good while hanging here-“

VROOM!!

Starlight’s hair swayed rapidly while her beanie almost flew with the wind as a neon bike that looks like from the movie; Deadline, sped past her.

“WOOOO! FUCK YEAH!” The retarded biker yelled, his arms up in the air while his hand raised it’s middle finger.

“What the heck?” Starlight pondered, she witnessed the pose of the biker. She followed the same motion as the biker did, raising the middle finger of a hand. She got a little bit of difficulty, judging from the grunts she did. Finally she did the same pose as the biker, middle finger in the air. “Kinda looks cool.” She mumbled, then cringed a little bit. She took out her phone and took a selfie with her doing the middle finger. She then sent the photo to Sunset, waiting for her reply.

A lone teenager listening to music walked past her. “Hey!” She said out loud, the teenager looking back and received a middle finger. Feeling insulted, the teen returned the favor and threw one middle finger to her back. Giving her a glare before walking away. Starlight frowned, and kept down her finger pose, before walking back down the street.

Her phone then beeped a ringtone, she grabbed it and opened it, receiving the said message from Sunset. After reading said message, she just shrugged to herself.

‘Wtf? Dude not cool.’

By the time the author has finished writing this, he or she felt the urge to ~~not~~ upload this stupid chapter or possibly the entire story to the Internet.

Yep, Canterlot City is doomed. And Jesus did not die for this.

Author's Note

Wow, two stories in a week.

Goddamnit I suck my boi. :facehoof:

See ya and please critique my stupidity, thank you very much.