Of Ponies and Pets

by Sandstorm94

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Anthro, Main 6, Princess Cadance, Spike, Starlight Glimmer, Adventure, Shining Armor
Length: 2078

Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship, has a hot sauce addiction. When her friends and family try to stage an intervention, and Applejack angers Twilight, it will set them on an adventure they never thought possible.

Since becoming the Princess of Friendship, and having to deal with saving Equestria every few months, Twilight has turned to the bottle. However, instead of late nights at the bar with Berry Punch, she has took up drinking bottle after bottle of hot sauce.

Naturally, Spike becomes concerned, and when he arranges an intervention Applejack makes a mistake that could mean a choice between returning home or living their lives as pets.

This story is a commish-request by Viper Pit.

Contains: Anthro Mane 6, Petting,
snuggling, and mentions of drinking.

Published 2018-03-07 20:00:07 UTC
Last updated 2018-03-07 20:00:07 UTC

Intervention and Misdirection

Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship, was a name known by everypony and their grandmother. Her, along with her friends and student, had become the go-to whenever there was a friendship problem needing to be solved or a villain beat. However when there was no such event going on, things tended to get boring, and each of the Mane 6 and Starlight going about their own lives and responsibilities. Twilight, when not tending to her princess duties, often was found by Spike muzzle deep into a book and swigging bottles of hot sauce. At first, he didn’t say anything about it, but one day he had finally decided it was time for her to face the music.

“Hey Twilight, got a minute to talk?” Spike asked as he entered the library, finding Twilight in her usual bean bag chair, however the open case of hot sauce bottles beside her was a warning that she was in a down mood. “If this is a bad time I can always come back later.”

“Nonsense Spike,” Twilight said, looking up from her book long enough to take a sip from the bottle she had suspended in her magic. “Grab a seat and come sit by me, I am halfway through finding out what happened to Greydolf the Wizard after he left Lower Eques, as was told to Starswirl himself.”

“Wait a minute,” Spike said pulling up a seat beside Twilight, the slur in her words was noticeable, and the smell on her breath made the dragon’s nostrils burn. “I thought that whole series was just the stuff of myths, but Starswirl claims that the wizard was real, and left you borrow the book to prove it?”

“Yes,” Twilight said flipping the page, the delicate and yellowed pages showing their age. “in fact, this is the original manuscript. I went to him to try and find out if he had any interesting books that he could lend me, since I have read every book in this library twice, and he presented me with this. Anyways, what is it that you wanted to talk to me about?”

“I’m just going to come out and say it, Twilight Sparkle you have a drinking problem.” Spike closed his eyes, expecting a semi-drunk Twilight to smack him clear across the room, but instead when he reopen them she was just looking confused. “All day, everyday, I can’t see you go fifteen minutes without drinking the stuff. Hay, Starlight still has scorch marks around her left forehoof from when you caught her using some, then threatened to burn it to a stump.”

“To be fair I had made it perfectly clear to you two, and even Trixie, that while here my hot sauce is off limits to everypony but me. Since the original factory I got this stuff from burned down in a fire, I have to import the stuff from my supplier in Hooviet, and the import fare is not cheap coming from there.” Twilight, as if trying to make a point, clugged the rest of her bottle in three seconds before starting on the next. “Granted, it is well worth the price, and I can afford it thanks to my personal stipend.”

Spike just stared at the alicorn in disbelief. “Are you kidding me?! Twilight, you are so deep in the pit of denial that I’m surprised that you haven’t reached Tartarus by now. Even Pinkie Pie manages to control her consumption, but you drink so much I am trying to figure out how you have any digestive tract left.”

“I’m an alicorn Spike, I’m practically indestructible.” Twilight said with a deadpan stare. “Besides, any damage that is done I fix with a simple healing spell. Rest assured Spike, I am perfectly fine.”

Spike walked out the room furious, channeling the equivalent of millions of angry souls at the alicorn as he mentally fumed. “I liked her better as a unicorn, at least then she wasn’t such a stuck up flankhole who couldn’t see her way out of a glass house.”

In that moment he had a moment of clarity, an idea bouncing into his skull like Pinkie Pie on a sugar rush. He ran to his room and began to right, hoping that Twiight would at least listen to her friends and family. Finishing off the last letter, he blew fire on the nine pieces of parchment and then fell into a long waiting game.

A week later, Spike woke up due to hearing somepony knocking on the door. A quick check into Twilight’s room showed that she was still out cold, suffering from another one of her many hangovers, before going to the door. When Spike opened it, he found each of the ponies he had sent a letter to standing there.

“Thank you all for coming,” Spike said standing aside and allowing the others to enter. “I feel that this problem has gone on for far too long. I tried talking to her, but that didn’t work, so I figured an intervention was in order. Starlight, Trixie, I’m sorry for cutting your tour short, but I felt that since you normally live here you needed to help.”

“Trixie accepts your apology.” The magician said while putting her hat and cape on the coat rack. “Our next show is actually in Ponyville, so you have nothing to worry about Spike.”

“Glad you are not too mad,” Spike said with a sigh of relief, then turning his attention to Shining and Cadance. “I’m glad you were able to get here on such short notice, I assume that Sunburst is looking after Flurry Heart?”

“Actually my mom is,” Shining said with a small sigh. “Sunburst has a head cold, so she volunteered to help out there.”

“You know the rest of us are always free to help Spikey,” Rarity said giving the drake a kiss on the forehead. “so where is she now?”

“If you mean me, I’m right here…” Twilight said with a yawn as she came down the stairs, looking like she had lost a fight to a bugbear. “Why are you all here, is there another villain I need to beat?”

“Wow Twily you certainly have become ignorant,” Shining said with a glare. “and you can say that there is a villain. In fact, it is you, or more specifically your hot sauce addiction.”

“I see…” Twilight’s voice was calm, too calm for anypony’s liking. “You know, seeing you all here and being concerned about how much I love the sauce has done something to me. I see now that Spike has a point, maybe I do have a problem, and I will try to limit my consumption in the future.”

The whole group smiled, surrounding and trapping Twilight in a group hug. For the first time in ages the alicorn was content, that is until Applejack pulled the hot sauce bottle Twilight had away, spilling its’ contents all over the floor. The mental calm that had become Twilight's mind was broken, becoming a raging Maelstrom of an unpredicted scale.

“My hot sauce…” Twilight said in a soft whisper, staring at her most beloved drink with a great sadness in her eyes. “It was gone too soon, however, justice will be served for its unfortunate passing.”

Everypony, and the lone drake, gulped at Twilight’s words. Applejack made a beeline for the door, only for it to be slammed and locked in her face, the impact being hard enough that her hat went sliding across the floor.

“Now Twi,” Applejack said as she scanned the room, looking for an alternate escape route that did not involve coming near the angry alicorn. “Ya just admitted that you had’a problem, there is no need for ya to get all hostile.”

“You don't realize what you have done, do you?” Twilight's tone was like cold, hardened steel as she approved the farmer at a slow pace. “You destroyed the property of a princess, so now it is time for you to face your punishment.”

“Woah now,” Applejack said as she put her forehooves up in defense. “Rainbow breaks yer windows all the time and I don't see her having any kind of punishment, why do I?”

“Actually, Rainbow does have a punishment every time she breaks something.” Twilight looked back at the pegasus, causing the prideful mare to look away in a mix of embarrassment and shame. “Now back to you, your punishment is I'm going to use you as a test subject to remotely teleport you somewhere.”

Applejack blinked, surprised that the punishment seemed so easy, but she knew there had to be a hidden price. “That's it? If that’s the case, then send me back to the farm.”

“A willing test subject? I haven't had one of them in ages.” Twilight said with a crazy grin, her horn coming to life as she got right in Applejack's face. “Stay still while I teleport you, don't want any pieces to be missing when you rematerialized.”

Applejack gulped, the others pouncing to try and stop Twilight but they were too late. The pouncing, plus the minor hangover Twilight still had, threw off her concentration and the room was filled with a bright flash. Each of them looked around disoriented, trying to get a sense of what had happened.

“Where the hay are we?” Applejack asked trying to look for any familiar landmarks, and when she realized where she was her eyes widened. “Wait a second, we’re in Sweet Apple Acres, but something still seems off.”

“Like how the trees are bigger?” Fluttershy asked while examining an apple, the fleshy red fruit being half her body length, and a glance at the trees had to put them at over 150 feet tall. “Or the giant version of you bucking apples?

“Say wha-?” Applejack reeled, spinning to look where Fluttershy was pointing, and nearly fainted on sight. There was another version of her, bipedal and three times her height, karate kicking a tree with her right foot.

“Girls, I think I know what happened,” Twilight said in a soft whisper, all eyes turning to her. “I teleported us to Sweet Apple Acres, but I also put us in another dimension. That took a lot of magic, and I'm suffering from a withdrawal because I can feel it, so until my magic builds back up we're stuck here.”

“Why can't Starlight teleport us?” Spike said hopping up onto Twilight's back. “After all, you and her traveled to alternate dimensions before, it shouldn't be too hard for her to do the spell.”

“Sorry Spike, but I can't.” Starlight said with a sigh, shame clearly showing on her face. “I am a unicorn, and if that teleport drained Twilight that bad, what do you think would happen to me if I attempted it?”

The whole group went silent, several bad scenarios going through their heads, but before they could react a thick rope suddenly had them bound tight.

“Gotcha vermin,” The larger Applejack said with a sneer. “So, you another of Crysalis’ tricks, trying to blindsided me when I had my guard down? Or work for Flim and Flam and trying to take my secret recipes?”

“Neather,” Twilight said in a sharp tone, one that made even the bipedal Applejack flinch. “Leave us tied up here and go get your Twilight and friends, we will not run, and if you are like our Applejack you know I'm telling the truth.”

“Ah can tell,” The anthro Applejack said leaning down and petting Twilight, making the alicorn hum in content. “although I must say ya’ll are really cute, the fact ya’ll come up to my knee makes each of ya the perfect size for a pet.”

"Don't get any funny ideas," Twilight said with a small huff, we are just you girls from an alternate dimension so we are not meant to be kept as pets."

"I know, but you just stay put and I will be back soon." The anthro Applejack said before running off, each step making the ponies briefly lose their balance.

"Might as well get comfortable," Twilight said in a small voice as she looked at the ground. "We aren't in our Equestria anymore..."

Author's Note

Self explanatory... This is a commish-request by Viper Pit, please note that the Mane 6 are still ponies, and are the size comparison of a large house cat, but in anthroquestria.

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