The Conversion Bureau Vs Aliens Of All Kinds

by Shadowflameking

Rating: teen
Tags: Science Fiction, Royal Guard, Profanity, Random, Violence, Princess Celestia, Crossover, Death, Alternate Universe, Human, Gore, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 5203

We all know The Conversion Bureau right?

We all know The Conversion Bureau right? Those stories where the ponies go evil and try to turn all humans into tiny zombie horses and make them into slaves ,well what if they dint have to deal with humanity but aliens much more powerful then humans ever were?

Published 2018-03-11 20:00:07 UTC
Last updated 2018-06-04 20:55:09 UTC

The Xenomorphs

Author's Note

Each chapter takes place in a diffrent universe then the last
Im looking for an editor who will edit my works with no questions asked so long as I give em credit.
A side note if you dont like stories where ponies are the bad guys or get killed kindly bugger off,I dont have to cater to your every want or need.
:twilightsmile:

The Xenomorphs

Humanity had been fighting hard for an entire year shooting, bombs, bullets, missiles, and even a few nukes,but nothing was able to break it and thus humanity was defeated and wiped out of the cosmic map like a grain of sand on the beach.

Princess Celestia had done it,she had transformed most humans into ponies via the potion and the others where killed by the barrier she had made.
Beutifully she had terminated humanity but not there buildings,she had left them intact to take any knowlage she could use to better her ponies lives,and her top researcher Dark Ice had informed her he had found a large under ground lab of some kind dedicated to researching something the humans called a Xenomorph.

Celestia trotted over to the black unicorn who looked at her with a smile. "Hello your majesty ,I found this lab and like you had asked me, and I found this containment cell with what I think is a dragon egg inside it."

"That is something I would love to see,is what a dragon from earth looks like,show me to the cell." Celestia said thinking of what it would look like and what exactly the humans had contained it for.

The unicorn bowed and trotted down the hall and into a small room with a clear glass window that showed the inside of the cell wich contained a brownish looking egg about the size of a normal dragon egg. "This is most interesting,is it due to hatch any time soon?." She asked turning to Dark Ice.

He looked at the Princess. "I am unsure as I have not sent anypony in to check on the egg yet,would you wish for me to do so now your highness?"

Celestia gave a nod. "Yes."

Dark Ice nodded and with a wave of his hoof a guard pony trotted into the cell after he opend the door,the door closing behind him he walked up to the egg.
As soon as the guard stallion got within ten feet it the egg began to shift slightly from side to side, and low gurgling noises came from inside of it.

The princess and Dark Ice stood waiting to see what exactly would happen ,had the dragon in the egg scensed the guard and thinking it was its mother thought it was time to hatch?

With a slow, sucking noise the top of the egg split. It didn't crack. The top of the egg opened like a flower with four thick, wet petals that peeled back to reveal its contents. Layers of mucous and thin, pale membranes concealed most of what was inside from the ponies' view, but the gurd could make out a glistening black colored carapace and a long, flexible tail like an animal's spine gently coiling and slithering around itself.

The guard stallion ave a gulp and backed up some,now unsure if he sould poke at the egg now that he was sure that watever that was it was NOT a dragon egg.
The newly-hatched creature suddenly moved with unbelievable speed. Tail whipping around like a snake, the thing launched itself out of its egg and directly at the guard stallion, unfurling long, spidery legs that had webbing like a ducks foot. Before he could even process what was happening it was on his face and gripping his head with those hideous thin legs while the tail tightened around his throat.

The guard stallion only had time to let out a gasp before he was on the floor trying to peel it off,only to go limp moments later.
Princess Celestia and Dark Ice gave a look of horror at what whas happining to the guard stallion and Dark ordered two more guards to go in and pry that think off there friend,when they tried to do so it's tail tightend more around the stallions throat.
They backed off for fear of hurting the guard and waited for whatever was to come.

Celestia turned to Dark,wondering if he knew exactly since he sent him to resaerch anything he could find here. "Dark,so you have any clue what that thing is?"

He shook his head. "No your majesty."

She looked to the guard with the creature on his face. "Then we have no choice but to wait and see what happens since that thing wont come off without killing that poor stallion." Dark Ice nodded in agreement.

Had they known what that was they would have gladly killed that stallion and turned the entire place to ashes.
What had attacked and attatched itself to that stallion was a facehugger,and not just any facehugger it was a QUEEN facehugger.
Now you may be wondering 'whats the diffrence?' to put it simply this facehugger impregnates a host with two alien embrios in the chest,a drone and a queen,and once its done it will continue to live for about an hour after it falls of the hosts face.

It was about two hours later that the creature had fallen off the stallions face and crawled away ,and gave the guards a chance to get that poor pony to the medical wing of the facility and placed him into a bed to rest,they left to let him get some sleep so that one he woke up they could do some tests to see if he was ok.
But he would never wake up as he coughed in his sleep and with an explosion of blood and bone two little Xenomorphs shot from his chest with a screach and slid into the vent.

They slithered around in the vents and into an unmarked room with ten more eggs in it,it had been sealed off to all but the vents before the place was abandoned to escape the barrier.
The newborn Xenomorphs had no limbs, like a snake, and the pronounced dorsal ridge indicated the presence of a backbone, but instead of scales its hide was segmented like an exoskeleton, and they had no visible facial features except for a mouth full of sharp teeth and second inner jaws,the Queen however had larger head and the sides curved out.

The eggs sensing the presance of a queen opened up like the first ,and the facehuggers crawled into the vents to impregnate new hosts and make more drones for the young queen.

The drone and the queen had molted there skins and grew to adult size about a day later ,when some guards had gone to check up on there friend the facehuggers had gotton them to and made five warriors and five drones,all of wich draged the bodies back to the queen so she could feed and grow.

Celestia stared in horror at the bloodstains that used to be her guards before turning to Dark Ice. "We are leaving and sealing this place off,now" She said,and with out any warning teliported away with Dark and left the remaining four guards alone with the hostile aliens.

The four remaining guards where picked off one by one,and each one had been brought to the queen for consumption or to be used as a host.
These Xenomorphs where diffrent from the classic Xenomorph XX121,as said alien in question took on some qualities of its host ,so these aliens had hooves and stood like a pony,some hard jagged horns or webbed wings,but they all had one thing in common and it was there will to protect there queen and continue the species.

Two weeks later in new canterlot Celestia was enjoying some tea when a guard ran into the throne room sweating and panting as talked. "Princess,I come with urgent news of the facility you requested us to guard and seal off."

Celestia looked up at him. "Yes,what is it?"

He gave her a horrified look. "Every guard stationed there has been killed."

Celestias tea cup dropped from her magic grip and shattered on the floor splashing its hot contents onto the floor. "How?" she asked with a neutral look.

He sat down. "I do not know your highness I had just gone there to check up on my friend steal wing but all I found where bloodstains and corpses."

Celestia sent the guard on payed leave.
It was then that a loud screaching filled the air and she heard her guards fighting outside,taking a look out a nearby window she saw something out of a horror movie,her guards being slaughtered by large black equine like insects.
She would have called them changelings but they where clearly far from a changeling because of there large banana shaped head,second inner jaws,and long deadly bladed tails that where currently being used to stap any guard that tried to fight back against them,any who sucsedded learned quickly of the xenos acid blood and how painful it was to get it on ones face or legs since the poor bastard who did melted away and died quickly.

In the center of it all was one larger then the rest and it was two times bigger and taller then Celestia,it gave a screach and the xenomorphs quickly killed the rest of the guard and the queens head turned to Celestias direction and before she could react she was grabed from behind by one of the aliens,and she screamed as its tail shot through her chest,she coughed up blood but still alive.
The alien seeing its prey still alive opened its mouth to reveal a second mouth,and it shot out and right through the solar alicorns skull killing her instantly.

The queen was pleased she had managed to find quite a lot of hosts for her facehuggers and the aliens soon defeated all of equinity and surprisingly enough left the new foals alone ,not bothering to use them for hosts since they could sense something was wrong with them and it would not go well if they tried to.

"You still don't understand what you're dealing with, do you? The perfect organism. Its structural perfection is matched only by its hostility."
―Ash

Species Unknown

Chapter 2 Species Unknown

Princess Celestia watched as the barrier destroyed the last of the humans 'safe zones',she did give them credit where it was due because they fought till the bitter end and even used the remaining nuclear arms in a last ditch effort to destroy the barrier,but all it acomplished was them being killed off and the land poisoned.
The barrier was an odd thing,it destroyed any humans or human made things while reparing the land and clensing it of anything harmfull.

Unknown to Princess Celestia an alien ship was on its way to earth to harvest its crop,a crop she had destroyed without a second thought ,and she was going to pay dearly for it because she had pissed off a species that even the humans would have a hard time beating with all there tecnology and weapons.
A large disc shaped ship with ridges on the top sat just in earths orbit,the size of texas and its inhabitants where quite pissed off,and here is a breif explination why.

The aliens (wich I shall now call drones) are black cephalopod like creatures with the ability to transfix and utilize the brains of different species to power themselves,they are responsible for the creation of human kind who acts like a crop for them to harvsit brains to build there army for millions of years.
The drones powered there soldgiers by placing human brains into various bio-mechanical stuctures like an organic computer.

Drones are squid octopus like aliens with multipul eyes and glowing lights on there tenticals that they use to bring other species into a trance like state,and to others the most horrifying fact of all is drones have the ability to steal the brain and spinal cords of there prey.
And guess what? Celestia was a moron and destroyed every last trace of that crop ever being there,so now you have very very pissed off nope aliens that can take your brain out and use it like a fucking computer

Celestias barrier set off a small alarm ,and she looked up to where it had been triggered only to see a massive floating disc,she could only watch as hundreds of little black dots with glowing blue dots (there eyes) fell down from the ship and through her barrier like it wasent even there.

"GUARDS! get the potions ready!" Celestia said hoping the potion would work on these things.
The guards rushed and got the conversion potions and the potion tiped crossbow bolts,no dought they would not be affected since drones can only be taken down with a high caliber rifle.

The drones surged forwards,driven by the hive mind with only one goal ,harvest every sutible brain for processing and use for the hive mind.
A royal guard mare tried to stab a drone with her short swords,only for it to slide out of the way and a tentical to grab her head.
She felt a burning sensation before her head exploded and a glowing blue brain and spinal cord was in the grip of the drones tentical,her nw lifeless body fell to the ground with a wet splat as other guards watched in horror.

Pegasi shot lighting at the drones hoping to kill them,while other guards shot stun spells or potion tipped bolts.
The lightning did have some effect slowing down the aliens advance ,but the spells and potions just bounced off there thick hide ,while every drone that was lost ten more took its place.

Royal guards left and right where being killed and there brains harvested for the hivemind and used to replace old ones that had rotted with time,the drones let out a horrible screaching sound that sounded like metal grinding on metal,Celestia stared in horror before shooting a few drones with solar magic.

The drones hit with the solar beams died with a screach and the brains they had collected spilled out of there now open mouths,they softly glowed blue before fading and turning the normal pink color and dying.
All drones in the area now targeted Princess Celestia as there main target ,deaming her to be a real threat the hive mind chose they would use her brain to replace the core one in the center of the ship untill a new one had to be found in another million years.

Celestia ducked and raised a shield as one large drone launched itself at her ,its mouth opining and its tenticals crackling with blue electricity as it tried to grab at her,she was sweating and panting due to the shear amount of drones bashing at her shield cracks where starting to form and her horn sputtered out before in a last ditch effort to get away she took flight.

Only to have one tentical shock her right between the wings,and it stayed there till the flesh was chared black,she looked up to the drone who had gotton her and its eyes flashed red and its tentical grabed her head before she felt her skull explode and the drone let out a victory screach before bringing the brain to the center of the ship.

The hivemind was pleased and the brain in the main core droped out grey and lifeless before the drone put the new one in,and the entire ships blue lights got brighter as it replanted humanity back onto earth before leaving,awaiting for there crop to grow enough so they could once again harvest it.

Author's Note

short I know,but eh im doing this for fun and cause I feel like it ,same for all my other stories

War Of The Worlds

Princess Celestia gave a smile as a newfoal brought her some tea before leaving,she had been quite happy now that all humans where eather dead or newfoals.
Thankfully her shield spell tamed the weather and animals of this planet just like Equestria before she teliported it to 'Earth' now named new Equis.
She did stop mid sip of her tea to nibble on a slice of chocolate cake before she felt the ground rumble,taking a look outside her castle window she saw giant metal cuddle fish shaped things crash into the ground.

She looked on as the metal cuddle fish grew three long tentical like legs,as the tripods stood up they released a long fog horn like sound as two tenticals with cresant shaped things glowed blue and shot her guards,turning them into ashes and there armor into molten slag.
Celestia stood up,her tea forgotton and her horn glowing as she shot out of the window and started shooting beams of solar magic at the tripods.
The tripods gave no sign of feeling her attacks as she saw a shield flare up and become visible when her blasts hit it,before she got an idea and charged up her barrier spell.

A pink barrier washed over the tripods ,having no effect other then to make them tinged a bit pink when looking from the outside.
The tripods walked out of the barrier and started turning guards to ashes with there heat rays,and a small barrel under one of the tripods shot out what looked like a glowing red and black can,it hit near a small platoon of guards and relased a black mist that killed the guards as they gasped for air before dying and falling on there sides,the same happining to any guard who got close or had a can of the gas shot near them since it was carried by the wind and stayed near the ground.
Another tripods heat ray hit the castle turning it into ruble that killed any guards to close to the castle.

The princess looked in horror as her subjects where killed of by these tripods ,before she tried to use the elements.
The Elements swirled around her,the element of magic focusing in the center as she hovered off the ground as there power built up and shot one of the tripods,its shields flared before giving out and the glass cockpit blew out with a torrent of red goop.

Sadly for her this got the attention of the other tripods as they focused soley on her and began shooting there heat rays at her,the elements where having a hard time keeping up the shield that Celestia had made using there magic.
Slowly cracks began to form on the shield,before it shattered and the once mighty Princess Celestia was turned into nothing but ashes.

The royal guard sounded to retreat, Captain steel tried to get his troops to evacuate to the everfree,but he looked up to see a tripod looking at him as a long tentical with a needle on the end of it shot into his chest and his blood was drained.
Captain Steel knew no more as the tripod droped the lifeless body and sprayed a red mist of blood on everything around it,and where it was sprayed a blood red vine like weed grew from the ground and completely destroyed any native plant life it grew near,even crawling up a few unlucky guards and sucked the neutriants and blood out of them so it could continue to grow.

The tripids killed any who dared get in there path and soon the pony species was now extinct,but just as the tripods had won,they had also lost as one started wobbling around before falling over dead and powered down,a hatch on it opend up and a flood of red pinkish goo sloshed out before an alien crawled its way out looking at the sun as it dried up into a husk and died,and soon after the other tripods joined it.
The red vine weeds also affected lost there bright red color and died turning grey and where blew to dust by the wind.

For all the ponies magic nothing could harm the tripods except the elements of harmony ,and those where one shot only so they had time to recharge.
But for all the aliens tecnology they had been killed by the simplest lifeforms on eart,ones both ponies and humans had evolved with and long since grown emmune to was ultamatly the demise of the invaders.

Author's Note

again it may be short but im doing this for fun and cause I feel like it,let me know what ya think of this story so far.

The Zetans

This takes place in the fallout universe before The Great War where every nuclear capable country launched there nuclear and atomic arms.

It began around a year ago,Equestria had apeared 50 miles off the coast of flordia,there had been a pink barrier around it,at first it seemed nothing was going to happen,but two days later it began to expand and destroy every human or human made thing it touched.
The U.S started firing weapons at it in the hopes of destroying the barrier,they launched mini nukes at it,used there orbital bombardment systems,and had robots shoot slash and hack at it,the robots that touched it rusted into dust and the bombardment systems had no effect on the barrier.
The Enclave had seen what would become of humanity if they stayed here,and raced to finish there space program to launch V.I.P's and other civilans and military personal into space.

After two months they had suceeded and taken any tecnology,weapons,blueprints,and anything else they thought would be usefull into space with them along with the president and most of congress.
The Enclave had plans to colonize the moon and mars and thus they landed on the moon first and set up bases to watch what would happen to earth from there.

From the moon one could see most of the planet now had a pinkis hue and the enclave watched in anger as the last bit of green on Earth turned pink,and thus humanity on earth was extinct.

The zetans had been watching this go on,and they did not like what they saw the ponies of new Equestria do.
They had tried to preserve human culture by freezing humans from many diffrent times in human history from samuri to cowboys ,and now all that effort was useless and the zetans would destroy this threat.

The zetan aliens are diminutive ,hairless,yellowish-green-skinned humanoids with short wiry limbs and green blood. their heads are disproportonatley large ,with round heavy lidded solid black eyeballs with no discernible iris or pupil; a mouth filled with sharp teeth with a green tongue ,and two pairs of of small holes where the ears and nostrils would be. They have no thumbs ,each hand insted having three long,tentacle like fingers with large suction cups at each finger tip that allow them to manipulate objects.

They had taken countless numbers of tecnology from humans and stored it in the storage center of there ship as a sort of human museum dedicated to the human species as a whole and not just one nation,there where laser rifles and other tecnology there.

The captain turned to his adviser and spoke. "What exactly is that barrier made of? I want it destroyed." He said turning back to the terminal he was at.

His adviser nodded. "Ill have the research team look into it and see if we can find out what it is." He walked off to the researchers wing of the mothership.
He walked up to the lead researcher who to his suprise already had a data pad with him.

"I know what your here for,and you will be pleased to find me and my team have already found that barrier is made of a weak gamma radiation and its just like one of ours force fields,so it shpuld be easy to destroy for us and it explanes why the humans tecnology was not able to penitrate it." He said handing the data pad with the information on it to the adviser.

"The captain will be pleased,you are looking at a pay raise sometime this week." he said walking back to the captain and showing him the data.

The captain nodded. "Yes this will be easy." He said before a small alarm got his attention and turned to the enclaves moon base.

The Enclave had been working on a super laser that would have been able to destroy the barrier ,but they did not have the time to finish it untill they got to the moon.
It looked like a statonary weapon that couldent turn,it had a long round barrel that slowly spun glowing red and on the sides of it where 20 fusion cores each,and inserted into the controls was four power cells.

"Prototype laser 1 is ready to fire,you may fire." A oporator from the base said into the soldiers helmet.

"Firing now." He relpied before the laser charged up glowing a bright red before shooting a ten foot wide beam of red energy in a constant stream at Earth.
The beam stoped after about thirty seconds,all fusion cores and energy cells completly drained.

The beam hit the barrier and to the horror of anypony watching it began to crack and break before the sound of shattering glass was heared and the barrier shatterd into magical shards before fading away with glittering dust.

Princess Celestia rubed her forehead with a hoof,all those things the humans had shot at her barrier gave her such a headace,but this thing had made her get a snout bleed the migraine was so bad.

The zetan captain stared for a few moments before he turned to his terminal and pressed the speaker button. "Scramble the saucers and have them kill the equines so the humans can retake the planet and pick the rest off once we are done and gone."

Saucers flew from the mothership and quickly entered the atmosphere,Celestia looked up as flying saucers flew around her new planet and started shooting anything pony made,from random houses and villages to her castle.
Before the Princess could even light up her horn one of the aliens blue beams hit her and she fell to the floor knocked out,the saucer that shot her beamed her up to the ships research and biological experimenting department center.
The same happened to about one hundred of each pony species and soon everything that the ponies had made was gone,and the zetans left so the Enclave would not find them,and so they could study and experiment with the new specimens they had found and taken.

Author's Note

hey everypony,this is the last chapter of the story so I will post pics of every alien I used,except for the xenos cause you already know what those look like.
And on a side note if anypony wants to try this concept for yourself then go ahead! and let me know if ya do cause i will look forward to reading it if anypony does

Mars attacks!

Mars Attacks!

Princess Celestia laughed as the last of humanity was destroyed by her barrier,It had been nice to win and have everything go as planned,it had taken months and her conversion bureaus had been such a hit with humans that wanted a change of life,but soon others noticed those who where converted not only became a pony but also lost the ability to show any 'negative' trait such as anger or sadness,and only smiled largely and praised Celestia.

With all humans dead or turned into new foals she sat back in her throne and looked out a window to the sky of New Equis,the sun was just around midday,she wondered what she should do now before the day was over since she has some time to kill.
Unknown to her beings on a red planet where watching her invasion and laughing at how easily the humans where killed,abit it sounded more like 'Ak ak ak's' rather than normal speach.

A martian in a large purple and gold robe started 'ak aking' at martians in green space suits with a large glass dome over there heads with a large red tank on there back,all of them carrying weapons that looked like toy laser guns you'd see in the 50's.
The martian soldiers marched into there saucers that then took off and headed for Earth,or 'New Equis' and already ponies and new foals alike had set up monuments to Princess Celestia's might,soon the sky turned black and all ponies looked up,only to see thousands upon thousands of flying saucers.

Celestia Looked at the saucers before she activated her shield spell again,and to her surprise it fizzled out the second it came into contact with the saucers.
The Martain king looked down from a large mothership style saucer,he was sitting in a chair before he gave the signel to land.

Princess Celestia watched a large grey saucer,far bigger than the rest,land near her castle and the bottom opened up as twenty martian troops marched out in a row of ten each and parted way as there king walked through to Celestia before making a circle motion with his arm. "Ak ak!" He spoke in high pitched ak's,like every martian.

After a moment Celestia's horn light up yellow as she tried to cast a translation spell on the king,only for the troops to pull out there laser weapons and shoot at her and her guards,she threw up a shield,her guards however where not so lucky and when hit by the beam of there weapons turned everything but there bones to dust and leaving bones colored green,blue,or red.

Celestia's eyes and horn glew bright with power as she floated into the air and started using solar beams to shoot saucers out of the skies of her new planet.
For every saucer that she shot down ten more took its place,she was forced to watch as the aliens used some of the monuments to crush her little ponies,strangely enough they got along with the new foals and rode a few of them into battle as they shot there energy weapons turning more of her guards to bones.

The martians laughed as they crushed ponies using there own monuments of one they saw as a goddess that could move the sun,they gave no shits as they killed off ponies and took selfies of them standing in front of burning or blown up monuments.

The martian king wiped out his laser pistol and shot Celestias barrier causing it to shatter from the constant fire of the alien's weapons,he calmly walked up to her,put the barrel of his weapon to her head,and pulled the trigger,and this Celestia knew no more and equinity was killed off or used for random experiments like attaching the head of a pony to the body of a dog.

Author's Note

short and random i know,but its like the movie so enjoy

The Aliens from each chapter

the drone ^

alien from chapter 3

tripod from chapter 3

the zetans^