Welcome to Pooooonyville!

“Braeburn! Where in tarnation have ya’ been? Ah ain’t seen one hair or hoof of ya’ and your train was supposed ta’ have arrived hours ago. Get explainin’ cous’, and it better be a good one!”

Braeburn did his best to stammer out an appropriate response to his infuriated cousin. He couldn’t lie to Applejack; nopony could. Was it his fault his afternoon had taken a very unexpected turn?

“Well ya’ see cous’,” Braeburn began, blush forming on his face. “Ah’ stepped off the train and entered the square cuz I was plum thirsty after such a long ride.”

Applejack raised an eyebrow curiously, her curiosity peaked by Braeburn’s flushed appearance. Motioning her hoof in the air for him to continue, she spoke.

“Go on…”

“W-well ya’ see. Ah’m walkin’ around admirin’ the sights of your beautiful city, when all uh sudden, ah see somethin’ bright and pink and mmmphffff.”

Applejack muffled Braeburn with a hoof, her face forming an apologetic smile.

“Everything’s all right cous’. Ya’ don’t need to explain an encounter with Pinkie Pie. We’ve all been there.” Applejack paused to let out a chuckle. “Ah’ll bet she had ya’ runnin’ around more than Winona on rodeo day! Though you are pretty spunky yourself. You’re probably one of the few ponies in Equestria that can keep up with that one.”

“Ah shucks cous’, ah ain’t that spunky. She does keep ya’ on your hooftips though. Ah reckon ah know Ponyville like ah’ve lived here m’whole life.”

“Ah reckon she does, cous’. Ah reckon she does. Now then, how about we get ya’ll unpacked and getcha some grub. Tomorrow’s gonna be a busy day of applebuckin’. We’ll have ya buckin’ from sunup to sundown. And thank ya’ ahead of time for all the hard work ya’ offered to do for us. Ah can’t think of the last time we had more than two ponies buckin’ through the fields.”

“Tain’t no problem cous’, tain’t no problem at all. Although for tamarrah ahm afraid ah’ll have ta excuse mahself at five. Ah promised Miss Pie ah’d join her for some friendly dinner and dancin’,” Braeburn replied, a slight rosy tint coloring his cheeks. The blush went away as he noticed his cousin’s dumbstruck appearance.

“Oh Pinkie! How did it go dearie? And where is your special friend?” Mrs. Cake inquired.

“My friend Braeburn went to go unpack his things at Sweet Apple Acres. We’re hanging out tomorrow as friends usually do.” Pinkie responded, annoyance in her voice.

“Well now this won’t do,” Mr. Cake said, clearly annoyed. “I told that young stallion to bring you back here himself.”

“Silly Mr. Cake! I know the town way way way waaaaaay better than anypony! It’d be silly for him to make two trips, especially since he was supposed to be at the ranch right after he got off the train. I guess I made him take a teeeensy weeeeensy detour. Hehehehehehe –snort- hehehehe.” Pinkie giggled, her previous worries forgotten under her normal peppy behavior.

“Oh, well I guess that’s okay then,” Mrs. Cake responded. “Do you have any other plans with him, dearie?”

“You bet! I’m gonna show him how to do the Pony Pokey and show him the best places to eat!”

“Now that sounds like a proper first date,” Mr. Cake responded proudly. “He better bring you home after that though, or I’ll give him a stern talking to. It’s only proper he treat you like a lady.”

Pinkie Pie began turning red from anger.

“IT. IS. NOT. A. DATE!” she shrieked. Mrs. and Mr. Cake recoiled from her sudden explosion. “NO! No running away! You’re going to listen to me. I am sick of ponies assuming that just because I’m hanging out with a stallion that I’m DATING HIM. What? Can’t I be allowed to be friends with everypony? IS THAT IT?!”

Pinkie was breathing heavily in the Cake’s faces, her face full of rage. Mr. Cake found the courage to speak up first.

“N-no, Pinkie. We’re really sorry about jumping to conclusions like that. It’s not fair to you, and we do apologize. It’s just that-“

“You two,” Mrs. Cake continued, “looked just so perfect together. I mean he’s probably one of the few ponies that can keep up with you-“

“I know, which is why he’d be a great friend.” Pinkie interrupted, her features showing she was not amused.

“Yes, well, you’ll have to forgive us Pinkie. Maybe it was the way he treated you like a proper lady, or how he was such a gentlecolt to everypony, or maybe it was just the fact that he is drop-dead gorgeous.” Mr. Cake shot her an angry, jealous glance. “Sorry honey muffin, but it’s true. Though you’ll always be the most handsome stallion in Equestria to me. Either way Pinkie, there’s nothing to be ashamed of if you did want to date him. Just keep your options open, dearie.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Pinkie spat out venomously. Her hair had deflated in the process and dragged on the ground as she stomped her way upstairs and closed her bedroom door with an audible slam.