No Matter Where: Side Effects

by Clean Karma

Rating: teen
Tags: Death, Alternate Universe, Narcotics, Gore, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Adventure, Suicide / Self Harm, Profanity, Dark
Length: 3145

Honesty, Generosity, Laughter, Kindness, Loyalty, and Magic are the Elements of Harmony created to keep Equestria safe. But everything has an equal opposite.

Honesty, Generosity, Laughter, Kindness, Loyalty, and Friendship are the Elements of Harmony created to keep Equestria safe. But everything has an equal opposite.
Lies, Greed, Unhappiness, Animosity, Treachory, and Disunion are the side effects of these Elements: The Elements of Imbalance. Join Professor Karma as he tries to find these artifacts and put them in the safest place in Equestria.

This is a side story to my story No Matter Where. It is not a sequel.

Art work by Soraya. Take a look at her other artworks. They're quite nice. Thank her for working so long, it took her hours to do so.

Published 2018-03-25 18:10:06 UTC
Last updated 2018-04-19 19:21:35 UTC

Episode 1: Sour Apple Achers

If you tell the truth all the time ponies won't tell you personal things, even if you can help them.
If you lie all the time ponies will never believe what you say and thus never want to hear you.
Which is worse?

The town of ponyville, only recently had it begun to grow. Ponies wearing Stetsons and boots walked the dirt paths merrily doing work of some kind. Some were selling their wares, some pulled carts, but all had a smile on their face, happy to do their work. there were no foals, likely still in school as it was mid day. there were very few buildings but that made sense, there were hundreds of apple trees and barns along with homes were likely in the midst of these.

One pony was not smiling though. He wasn't frowning or upset, but he wasn't smiling. He had a black coat and a grey mane and tail. He wore a neck tie along with a grey jacket and carried a doctors medical bag. On his nose were a pair of light blue circular glasses. He contrasted greatly with the brightly colored ponies around him. His horn shone slightly in the sunlight as though it had been polished. No pony paid him much mind. As he trotted down the pathway he turned down a long path with apple trees on both sides of it. Before he could however, a blue earth pony taps his shoulder. The unicorn turned his head to look at the earth pony.

"Heya mister. Ah don't think yer gonna want tah go that way." He said, "Some strange disease has been spreading across the families around here and all the sick ones have been heading that way. It mahgt be contagious."

The mysterious unicorn nodded and replied in a low voice, "That's why I'm here." He turned his head back to face down the path again, "I'm...a doctor."

The blue pony shook his head, "We've had twelve doctors go in there...none of them came back."

The unicorn responded, "Well then, count me as number thirteen then." He began walking down the path. Behind him the earth pony was surprised but he rushed alongside the Unicorn and walked beside him silently. The two said nothing for ten minutes of the journey. As they walked the trees began to look more and more decayed. The first to break the silence was the mysterious blue earth pony.

"Name's Big Blue. Parents didn't have much of an imagination. What about you."

The unicorn didn't respond at first, taken aback from the sudden introduction, "Karma, Professor Karma if you want to be formal."

"Ah thought you were doctor."

"Well I am." Karma said calmly, "Technically that is. I am a Professor in title but my skills entail more than one trait."

Blue nodded his head, "So yer like them young'uns that run around doing odd jobs n' stuff?"

Professor Karma chuckled, "More or less. Is that the place over there?" Karma motioned with his head down the path at a house that stood to the left while the path went on.

"Nope." Blue responded, "That's the Core's house. The place we're looking fer is down yonder a little ways."

As they passed the building an ominous chill seemed to emanate from the wood. It's window frames were brown, possibly originaly yellow and the curtains were torn. The very area smelled like death. Karma scrunched his nose in disgust. Wanting to avert his thoughts from vomiting he asked a lingering question, "Why did you decide to come with me?"

Blue didn't respond immediately but when he did, he didn't avert his gaze from the path, "Because it's my fault." Karma didn't speak so Blue went on, "I...I'm the cause for this disease. I'm the one who let it spread. If I had just left it alone my family wouldn't be in this predicament."

Karma listened to the words but noticed something, "You don't have an accent."

"Never have." Blue replied, "I've been keeping that up since I was five. Before you ask why just think about a colt trying to fit in from the big city in a place like this. My parents didn't want me around. You think a city colt like me would be here otherwise?" He only stopped once he noticed Karma's stare. The Unicorn sighed and spoke.

"You've taken a bite haven't you?"

Blue chuckled sadly, "Well I wasn't the first. I know that. Oh look, we're here."

Karma looked forward again and saw the barn. It was large as far as barns go but it looked taller Blue remembered it. The front door hung open slightly. Death wafted from inside and stung their noses.

Suppressing a lurch from his stomach Karma stated, "Well, let's not dawdle." He opened the door. The smell, stronger than ever, assaulted them. Wind escaped from the large structure. Karma stood undeterred as Blues face began to scowl on it's own accord. The barn was dark inside with only a single window near the top of the other side. A beam of light emitted from the window similar to an arrow burrowed deep into the ground.

Before they could move however the sound of footsteps sounded. A pony began to step into the light. Blue stpped forward to help but was stopped from a slight bit of blue telekinesis from karma.

"Wait." He said to the large earth pony. Turning his head to the pony he asked in a foreign voice, "Servus! Excuse me sir! My name est Doctor Hoofenstein. I am here with my assistant to address ze current krankheit academic. May I en--"

"Doctor?" the figure asked in a raspy voice, slightly gurgling. From the tone he could tell it was a mare. Another voice rose from the darkness, "A Doctor?" along with several others.

"Another doctor is here?"

"Can he help us?"

"My stomach is making strange noises. Can you make it stop?"

From the darknes rose more and more figures. They stumbled out of the dark, most of them holding their stomachs. Some held their throats and covered their mouths. As they began to step out of the barn Blue started to take a step back in fear but Karma remained standing in place. As they neared him Blue could see their faces and all the fear in his mind was washed away with afresh blast of horrified sadness. Every pony there was crying, tears burning their eyes as they made their way to Karma. When they stopped he spoke.

"Ponies! I am sorry to inform you zat zere isht no cure!" He paused for a second to gage their response, "But I do know ze cause! I vould be greatly appreciative if you vere to give me ze Apple you all ate from."

A deathly silence deafened the little area. All the ponies turned to Blue. He stared back at them smiling. He opened his mouth but his voice was different, lower or guttural sounded.

"Χαίρετε. I am Thánatos. I have only to say one thing before your demise Professor."

Karma held his breath in anticipation.

"Ta stoicheía tha epiviósoun!" as he said these words Big Blue turned and ran. He fled into the woods leaving the other's behind. As he did he laughed to himself at foolhardiness of those incompetants. To think that they expected the Elements to simply die. That Professor was especially a fool, "He is more than a fool. Epísimos. He's--"

"On your back."

Turning his head around Blue saw Karma standing on top of him with a blank stare, but something was different. Blue rolled over on the ground to rid himself of the unicorn. When he came upright once more he looked around but saw nothing.

"Hello Thánatos." Blue jumped to his left as the voice sounded right next to him, "It's been a logn time since I last encountered you."

Blue looked behind to see nothing but shrubbery. The Karmas voice came from all directions. He yelled, "Psémata! I have never met you before!" He struck a tree breaking it in half.

"Oh I don't expect you to remember me personally. You've never done your own work before." in the blink of an eye something flew over and behind Blue. He turned around struck another tree.

"Miló! If you have something to say them you better pes to!"

With a chuckle Karmas voice resounded from under Blue, "Oh I count on it."

Professor Karma Log #221

Thánatos showed up today. With the Apple of Lies no less. Makes sense now that I think about it. Who else could lie so splendidly after consuming a treat such as that. I'll miss our little adventures but I'm afraid I have two new artifacts to keep hold of.
Note to self: send message to Princess Luna to have a proper burial for the poor ponies in the barn.
I guess that's all I can say for now. The Apple of Lies is in Hallway O and I'm tired.
Goodnight Susan

Author's Note

There's not much to say about this other than it's not a sequel but you probably read that already in the description. Please let me know in the comments what element you'd like next.
Antio sas.

Episode 2: A Need for Greed

Have you ever wondered the difference between want, greed, and envy?
Want is something we all experience and is even a good drive.
Greed makes you wish for something to the point of stealing.
Envy makes you willing to kill.

Moowisboro, the most peaceful town of Equestria inside the city Moo York. This city has been nominated the least crime ridden town for two years now. Its streets are the safest ones to walk on. Foals and calves alike could play anywhere within the towns areas without the fear of kidnapping, thievery, rape, or any number of crimes. Yep, it was a safe town.

Emphasis on was.

Professor Clean Karma looked down from the black cloud he was perched on. It poured tears he wish he could release. Instead he stood on top staring at a run down town. The streets were empty, the houses were quiet, and desire filled Karmas mind. As a changeling, he could feel the emotions of other creatures. Makes it easier for interrogations but maddening when you needed to concentrate. Karma clutched his head to suppress the current headache.

It would be so much easier to shut out the feelings from other creatures, to concentrate on his own feelings but right now, he needed to feed on something, even if it tasted like rock. As he took a few gulps of the wafting emotion, he tasted something slightly different, and a bit refreshing: confusion. Opening his eyes, Karma searched until his eyes rested on a white coated Unicorn. Her mane and tail were purple from what he could tell and done up in a ridiculously fancy manner. He jumped off the cloud and buzzed his way down to her. She was startled by both his arrival and appearance but she remained composed.

"Hello there. I take it you are the...um...creature waiting for me?" she asked. Karma said nothing, he merely nodded. The white unicorn breathed a sigh of relief, "Ah, good then. I must admit this place is pretty scary at first gla--"

"It better scary on second glance too." Karma interrupted her, "There's nothing good about this place right now. Hopefully after you help me, ponies can look around here with high hearts. Please follow me Miss Belle." He began to turn but stopped for second to add, "And please do not gaze at anything here. I will explain along the way."

Karma began taking steps down the street, opposite the direction the unicorn Rarity had come from. She followed suit and walked beside him. Silence would have infect their breaths if not for Karma's beginnings of an explanation.

"This little town was once the most peaceful town in Equestria. Safe streets, safe ponies, safe area. It was fine until 'it' happened." His eyes continually looked in different directions, as if staring too long at anything would hurt him, "A Diamond was transported here, a very dangerous diamond."

Rarities ears folded back in worry. "What does it do?"

"It creates greed. It's very presence causes greed to increase in the hearts of creatures. That is why we are here. It is somewhere in this town, and if we don't find it quick, it's powers will have spread to the rest of Equestria." At this point the changeling stops in front of a theater. The doors hang off the hinges and the curtains are tattered on the floor. Rarity stared at the building in fear, trembling from the presence of the building. Karma stepped in front of her and said , "If you see anything in there that grabs your attention, avert your eyes as quickly as possible. I don't want to have to fight you as well." Rarity nodded and the two of them walked inside.

It was a simple theater, it had seats, a torn screen, a projector, all the things needed for such a place. Rarity looked around in slight disgust of what the place had turned into. Substances she didn't want to know about were on the floor. The entire place had an eerie feel to it, even though the lights were still on. Professor Karma and Miss Rarity make it to the front of the theater and walk to one of the side doors. It said "Staff Only" but the door was wide open.

Rarity decided the best thing to do would be to take silence and put it out of it's misery, "So, Mister Karma, I'd like to ask you a question."

"Semi-free country. Go ahead."

Ignoring the slight comment Rarity asked, "Why do you need me? I understand that yes, I am the Element of Generosity, but what am I going to do if something bad happens? Be generous?"

Karma chuckled, "I understand your concern Miss Belle. if it helps make more sense then let me tell you that the elements have not always existed. They were made, as are all things in this world. They made of pure goodness, each zeroed into a particular moral. However..." Karma paused a second to cast a light spell as they stepped into the dark room. "...Like boiling salt out of water, each elements creation had side-effects. Each Element has the power to resist it's side-effect and in turn this allows the bearer to resist it's powers as well. Do you understand where I'm going with this?"

rarity nodded her head and cast her own light spell. The two tread forward slowly into the dark room. As they did ,creeks could be heard from every direction, as if the building itself wanted you yawn and had become unaware that it wasn't physically able to. After about a minute of walking, Karma stopped. He stopped so suddenly that Rarity almost bumped into him from behind. Using his light spell from his horn he through his light forward. It illuminated as it went until it came to rest beside a black box. The box looked like coal at first, on second glance the purple-ish coloration brought Rarity to a conclusion.

"Is that...obsidian?"

"It enhances the abilities of the diamond. It also cannot be altered by Unicorn magic."

Rarity frowned slightly until another question brought a curious thought to her, "Then...why did we stop? We'll have to pick it up won't we?"

"Look down." Rarity did so, and immediately regretted it. Right in front of them was a chasm, appearing to be bottomless in the dark room. One thing did surprise her though. She had always had a eye for detail, and if she wasn't mistake, something inside the chasm was moving.

"Those Miss Belle, are the ponies that weren't killed by their friends." Karma then began using his magic to float the box towards them. As he did, the figures looked up at them with eyes of pure white. They began groaning and screeching. They got louder as the box came closer. Eventually they began climbing over each other attempting to reach the box before it could finish it's path. The screams got louder and Rarity could see them a little bit more clearly. Their coats, manes and tails were black as molasses. Eyes and teeth glowed with unnatural white light.

When the box was finally right in front of them Karma whispered, "I won't be able to resist it's power so when I give this to you, you are run as fast as you can until you reach the outdoors. There should be a carriage there waiting for you. It will take you to Princess Twilights castle, she's waiting there for you. If the carriage is not there, you leave as flee as you can back home."

Rarity gulped and looked at Karma, "What are you going to do?"

"I'll fend them off as long as I can. Now go!" With that he uses his magic push the box into Rarity with great force. It shoves her all the way back into the theater. When she stands back up she can hear the screams and horrible sounds emtting from the room.

Run now!

She takes off as fast as she can with the box in her bag. the sound of hooves scurrying begin to get closer behind her as she exist the building. There a golden cage awaits her with two Pegasi guards.

"Come quick Miss Belle, we don't have much time!" She jumps inside as the chariot takes off. Looking over the side she can see pitch black ponies attempting to follow, but they stop as the sunlight seems to burn their skin. One makes it however and tries to climb inside. Rarity casts the first spell in her mind, which blasts the creature out. As he falls out however, a piece cloth falls from his mouth. Upon closer inspection Rarity sees that it's a bit of cloth from Professor Karmas tie.

Tears burn Rarities eyes, "No."

Professor Karma Log #372

Well, I'm not writing to you from my desk right now. Heh. I'm holed under a Candy shop in Moo York. I hope Rarity got out okay, the Needers here seem to be disintegrating finally so the Diamond must not be here. Twilight will do the right thing. It's been three days and I'm running out of water. I might get to see you again Susan.

Oh wait, I think I hear armor. Somepony must have sent for me. Well, I guess we'll have to meet some other time.
Goodnight Susan

Author's Note

Glad to finally get this chapter underway. If there are any suggestions for Episode 3, they would be appreciated.