Existing but not Living

by Fragment Soul

Rating: teen
Tags: Human, Sad, Main 6, Princess Luna, Drama, Gore, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Profanity, Princess Celestia, Death
Length: 3189

An immortal named Jason Jaquel resurfaces after many years of being gone.

Jason Jaquel is a perfectly normal human. He's not that strong, he's kinda goofy sometimes, and has no special powers. Aside from being immortal that is. Follow him as he makes new friends and experiences new things in Equestria.

Published 2018-04-05 15:50:07 UTC
Last updated 2019-03-02 23:40:26 UTC

That's a Load of Bull

Celestia sighed inwardly at the constant ramblings of the surrounding nobles. The Grand Galloping Gala had started an hour and a half ago and the one guest she had been excited to see was still not here, not counting her prized pupil and her friends of course, but now she was being forced to listen to the vapid and honestly, quite annoying ramblings of the aristocracy. It would have been fine if she was just on the sidelines listening, but since she was a princess, she had to actually take part in the conversation and pretend to care. She constantly swept her eyes across the ballroom to see if he was here yet, but so far, to no avail.

“... Oh, don't you agree Princess?”, one of the nobles asked her. Celestia snapped to attention.

“Oh, uh, yes you do make quite a good point.”, the Princess replied, not even knowing what the noble had asked her about. She had grown used to this sort of thing, pretending to care, laughing along, and responding to the occasional question or comment directed at her.

“Is everything alright Princess? You seem a little... distracted.”, another noble said.

“Everything is alright, I was just expecting somepony to be here, but he has not yet arrived.”, Celestia replied.

“Oh! Who is it you are waiting for?”, the noble asked.

“Just an old friend, he said he would be he-”, Celestia was interrupted by a roar and a crash over in the north part of the ballroom. She turned her head to see a body rag dolling through the air. Not the body of a pony, however, but the body of her human friend Jason Jaquel. “Gods damn it, Jason.”, she muttered.

Jason flew through the air, his body rag dolling in ways no normal human body should. He landed with a crash right onto the food table, breaking his arm and a couple ribs. Groaning, he picked himself up grabbing his arm and wrenching it to the side, effectively resetting the bone. His arm, along with the ribs he had broken, healed in a matter of seconds. He brushed the food and drink that had landed on him off of his shirt.

“God dammit man! That really fucking hurt!”, he shouted as a Minotaur pushed his way through the crowd.

“You need to apologize to my wife right now!”, the angry Minotaur shouted.

“What? All I did was bump into him! It was an accident!”, Jason replied.

“Did you just call my wife a HIM?!”, the Minotaur roared. Jason stuttered in an attempt to redeem himself.

“Alright, wait! All I'm trying to say is your wife is a very handsome man!” Great going Jason. You've justfuckedyourself., he thought to himself. The Minotaur roared and slammed his fist into Jason's face, crushing his skull and sending him flying, yet again, across the ballroom, this time into a marble pillar. Jason picked himself up as the bones in his face reconstructed themselves.

“Alright enough playing around!”, he yelled. The Minotaur came at and threw several punches. Jason dodged all of them and delivered a swift punch to the Minotaur's balls, causing him to groan and pain while clutching his groin.

“Ha! And here I didn't think you'd have anything down there!”, Jason taunted. He then grabbed the Minotaur by the horns and smashed his knee into his face, then pulled back and slammed the Minotaur's head into the very same pillar the Minotaur had thrown him into earlier.

“Is that all you've got you overgrown heifer?! You were so fuckin' eager to fight me earlier, what the fuck happened?!”, Jason shouted at the groaning Minotaur. The Minotaur managed to pick himself off the ground and assume a what Jason interpreted as a fighting stance. “That's right, get up and fight. I wanna see what you're made of.”

The Minotaur charged at Jason only to pass by as Jason sidestepped and spun a kick right into the Minotaur's back. The Minotaur stumbled from the blow, but quickly recovered. Turning around to see Jason bobbing up and down, the Minotaur decided that he needed to take a tactical approach, as any attempts to blindly charge in would end up in failure, most likely with him being knocked on his ass.

The Minotaur charged again, this time watching Jason's posture. When he saw Jason shift to the right ever so slightly, he knew. The Minotaur swerved left as Jason tried to sidestep in the same direction. The Minotaur's horns plunged into Jason's stomach, impaling him.

The crowd of ponies that had gathered to watch gasped at this. Grinning, the Minotaur then flung his head back, launching Jason through the air. Jason landed near a group of ponies causing them to gasp, and some of them to faint. After his wounds healed the blood on the floor and on the Minotaur's horns dissolved away into nothing. He picked himself up and looked over at the Minotaur, who was standing up in victory, not seeing that Jason had risen behind him.

Jason ran at the Minotaur, jumping into the air and drop-kicking the Minotaur in the kidneys. The Minotaur collapsed on the ground, groaning in pain as Jason got up and proceeded to elbow bomb the him. Jason then put the Minotaur into a choke hold, cutting off not only the air flow to the Minotaur's lungs, but also stopping the blood flow to his brain. He held there as the Minotaur thrashed about in a last ditch effort to get him off. Slowly the Minotaur started to pass out, his movements becoming weaker and more feeble by the second. Eventually the Minotaur stopped moving altogether, and Jason released him.

Jason stood up, running a hand through his messy hair. He walked over to the remaining food table and grabbed a cup of water. Almost every eye was on him as he made his way back to the Minotaur. Back at the Minotaur's side, he crouched down and poured the water on the Minotaur's head, slapping his cheek lightly.

“Wake up ya big lug.”, Jason said. The Minotaur woke up spluttering and shaking his head.

He looked up at Jason and asked, “Did I lose?” Jason nodded at him.

“How the hell? I never lose! Especially not against a creature as small as you!”, the Minotaur exclaimed.

“Well,”, Jason said,”To start off, I'm immortal, meaning I can't be permanently injured, nor can I die. Secondly I've been alive for over thirteen billion years, so I'm far more experienced. But I've got to hand it to ya, you're one hell of a fighter. If I wasn't immortal, you would be the winner, and I... well I would be dead on the ground. Good fight though.”. Jason held out his hand and helped the Minotaur up. They shook hands giving each other props on fighting skills.

“It's about time you showed up.”, said a voice behind Jason. He turned around to see Equestria's Princess looking right at him.

“Oh! Hi Celly!” He cheerfully said.

Author's Note

This is my first fanfic, so please don't hesitate to leave constructive criticism. Tell me what you liked and what you didn't. Thanks!!!

This Gala Totally Sucks!

Author's Note

Alright! The second chapter is finally out! I am soooooo sorry for making you guys wait so long, but i've had a lot of crap going on in my life that kept me from writing. I know this one is kinda short, but I wanted to get it out as soon as i possibly could. Remember to leave a comment letting me know what you thought. And remember, stay frosty my friends!

-Fragment Soul

This Gala Totally Sucks!

Celestia and Jason stood near each other conversing about recent events. Standing among them were several nobles, curious about who Jason is and how he knew Celestia.

"Excuse me?" a Noble mare said,"But, I was wondering...How exactly do you know the Princess?"Jason looked over at the mare, giving her a slightly confused look.

"So Celestia never spoke about me? Huh." he said, scratching his head, "Well I knew Celestia when she was still a child, heck I was even good friends with her parents, King Solaris and Queen Aurora." The nobleponies stared at Jason, dumbfounded.

"You mean to say that you are older than Celestia?" One of the nobles said, "That can't be right!" Celestia laughed at this.

"Oh, its true alright." Celestia said,"In fact, He is older than any other creature on Equus."The nobles look at Jason in astonishment. "He is so old," Celestia continued,"That he was around before the first ponies."

The noble ponies were about to say something when a white coated pony with a blonde mane and tail and a compass rose cutiemark walked up and started talking."Oh Auntie Celestia,"He said,"This gala is soooo boring!Do I really have to interact with all the ponies especially those common ones fro-"

Jason cut him off. "Shut up. You've literally just started talking, and I've already lost seventeen chromosomes." Jason said in an annoyed voice, "Not to mention the fact that you interrupted our conversation."

"I say!" the pony exclaimed, " Do you even know who I am?"

"Do I care?" Jason retorted.

"I am Prince Blueblood!" Blueblood shouted, "Nephew Of Princess Celestia and Princess Luna!"

"Again," Jason said, "Do I care?"

"I should have you arrested!" Blueblood shouted.

"Both of you stop it!" Celestia scolded, "You are both acting like children."

"But Auntie!" Blueblood whined. Celestia gave him an annoyed look.

"Ah shut it Bluebutt, no one wants to hear your whining." Jason said. At this, Celestia smacked him on the back of his head. "The fuck was that for?"

"Both of you need to stop bickering," Celestia shouted, "If you don't like each other, that's fine, but you need to at least tolerate each other while you're at the Gala!" Both Blueblood and Jason looked surprised at the princess's outburst.

"Sorry Auntie," Blueblood said, even though he was obviously not sorry, "I'll make an effort to get along with him."

"Ha!" Jason scoffed, "Keep kissing your aunt's ass like that and you're gonna catch pinkeye."

"Jason!" Celestia shouted angrily. Jason just laughed at her annoyed expression.

"Fine, I'm gonna go see if they have any liquor." Jason said. "I'm dying for a drink."Celestia glared at Jason as he made his way toward the remaining food tables.

As he walked over there, he surveyed the carnage he had caused as a result of his fight with the Minotaur earlier in the party. Several ponies and other various species stared at him as he walked by, whispering and pointing. Jason just kept walking, not because he wanted to avoid conflict, but because he simply couldn't give less of a shit about
what others thought of him. He made it to the tables and almost instantly spied what he was searching for. He walked over toward the table and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. He unscrewed the cap and proceeded to chug the whole bottle. He then grabbed two more, knocked the cap off of one and downing it too. He set the second empty bottle down and went on his way, but not before grabbing a fourth bottle.

As Jason made his way back through the party, he noticed that most, if not all ponies had gone back to what they were doing. A few of them glanced at him, but other than that, they paid him no mind. He eventually arrived at a row of chairs at the end of the ballroom. Sitting down, he placed one of the bottles on the floor next to him. He then opened up the one he was still holding and began to periodically drink from it while observing the party in front of him.

After about an hour or so, Jason had already finished the two bottles of whiskey he had grabbed, and had went back to the food table to grab two more. He was halfway through one of the bottles when a lavender coated mare came and sat down next to him.Upon noticing the various empty bottles scattered around Jason, the mare gave him an incredulous look.

"Drinking that much can't be good for you," she said, "Not to mention the fact that you should be passed out on the floor by now"

Jason laughed a little at her comment. "I have a high alcohol tolerance," he said, "But that's besides the point. If my guess is correct, then you must be Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship and former student of Celestia. Good to finally meet you." His words were only slightly slurred, as if he had only drank a few beers, rather than four and a half bottles of hard liquor.

"And you must be Jason Jaquel," Twilight replied, "An immortal being who is not only good friends with Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, but who was also good friends with their parents, King Solaris and Queen Aurora. Also,you were accepted as a member of the royal family, even though you don't act like it.

Jason Chuckled. "Looks like someone did their homework like a good little filly."

"Hey!" Twilight exclaimed, clearly miffed by Jason's snide comment.

Jason laughed a little bit. "No need to get so worked up," he said, "I'm just teasing ya."

Twilight scoffed at this. "Teasing?" she said, "We barely even know each other, if I were any pony else, I would've taken that as a serious insult."

"Ehh whatever. "Jason said, clearly bored, "If someone can't handle a joke, then they aren't worth my time."

Twilight gave Jason a confused look. "How are you gonna make any real friends then? That's obviously not a good way to go about it."

"I don't go out of my way to make friends," he said, "They don't stick around for long when you're immortal."

"Okay then," Twilight said, "Anyways, I've got to go, my friends are waving me over." After she spoke, she got up and headed in the direction of her other friends.

"Alright then..." Jason said before giving a yawn and drifting off into sleep.

Horrible Past, Terrible Future

"Hey Jason!"

I turned to see a girl with auburn hair jogging toward me.

"Hey Zoe, whats up?" I replied. Zoe stopped in front of me and I greeted her with a kiss on her lips. "Mmm," I hummed, "You taste like strawberries."

"Shut up you big goof!" she laughed while lightly slugging me in the shoulder, "It's just my new chapstick, but thats besides the point, there's something you need to come see. Follow me!" She motioned for me to follow her before jogging across the street in the direction she came from. I followed her for several blocks, until we started going into the junkier side of the city.

"Soooooo, what are ya trying show me?" I asked.

"You'll just have to wait and see!" Zoe responded, a mischievous grin on her face, "It's gonna be really cool! Trust me!"

"It better be." I said, while continuing to follow her.

Eventually, we arrived at an old building that look like it was about to fall apart. In front of the building, my friends Jared and Kevin were waiting for me. Jared was a stocky black kid, who's hatred for any show intended for children under the age of eight, was only rivaled by his love for Yu-Gi-Oh and Pokémon(ironically). Kevin was a tall Asian kid who was forever searching for a way to get the Season-Pass DLC for the latest Call of Duty game for free. They had their eccentricities, but that's what made them part of the group.

Jason.

"Hey Jason! Where the hell have you been! We've been waiting for like 30 minutes!" Kevin complained.

"Eeeeh, quit yer bitchin, Kevin. 30 minutes isn't even that long." Jared said, "You've been whining for the whole time, and I'm tired of it."

I laughed to myself. Jared and Kevin were top tier shit talkers, which was part of why I hung out with them. We had been friends since middle school, and they had stayed with me, even through the tough shit.

"Would you cucks quit squabbling and explain why I'm here!?" I called out. They both looked at me, and laughed a bit.

"Shut up Jason!" Jared responded, "That's why I fucked your mom!"

"Yeah!" Kevin called, "And I got your sister!" I responded with the most eloquent sentence I had ever spoken up to that point.

"Sit on a pinecone you fucks. You sound like salty 12 year olds on Xbox live." Zoe sat on the sidelines of the verbal firefight and laughed at each little exchange.

Jason!

"Ehh, you got us there." Kevin said, "Anyways, we wanna explore this old building, maybe make a hangout." To be honest, this wasn't the worst idea they've had. That honor goes to the time they wanted to skydive off of Jared's roof, using only trash bags as parachutes.

"Yeah, we could probably find a lot of stuff to do with the space." Zoe said.

"Oh, I'm sure the two of us could find something to do." I said, wiggling my eyebrows.

"Sh-shut the fuck up Jason!" she shouted, while pushing me away. God I loved messing with her like this.

"Ugh, could you two wait for another time to suck face?" Jared groaned.

Jason, wake up!

"Maaaaayyyyybbee, but where would be the fun in that?" I said. Jared just looked at me like I was stupid. "Alright, fine. Let's explore this shitty bui-"

I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. I pulled it out and saw that it was my boss. Fuck. "Hold on guys, I gotta take this." I said before answering the call. "Hello?"

Wake up!

"You have to come in to work" was the response.

"Really? Isn't there anyone else who
ca-"

"No, come into work now, we have 3 people out and it's the lunch rush." my boss replied.

"......Alright" I said, before hanging up the phone. I turned back to my friends and girlfriend. "Sorry, but my boss needs me at work, and I'm already in trouble for calling some customers a bunch of cunts."

"Yeah, it's cool, we'll just do this another time." Kevin said, with Jared and Zoey nodding in agreement.

"Alright see ya." I said, before breaking into a run across the street. I heard my friends call from behind me.

"Jason, look out!"

I turned to see the grill of a massive truck a few feet away from my face.

"Fuck."

JASON!

Author's Note

Whoooooooo! I'm back baby! It's been soooooo long, but the hiatus is finally over(Sort of). I'm typing on a phone, so it's really slow, and I've got a lot of things on my plate, so I won't have a lot of time to write, but I'm just glad that I can continue this story. I hope you liked this chapter, and enjoyed the little insight as to how Jason first figured out that he couldn't die. Anyways, hope you enjoyed, stick around, and stay frosty my friends!