Chapters Chapter 2 - The Topsy Turvy Prank
Arriving at the clubhouse that doubled as their temporary office, the girls were ready for their first big prank since they became Masters of Mayhem. The whole way there they had been having a laugh at the expense of Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon; who had gotten their comeuppance for attempted eavesdropping. Maelstrom and Disarray were already inside sitting at the conference table. In front of them were various folders, Mael had one open and was reading over it’s contents, sporting a very wide grin. Turning to face the girls with a smile of his own, Disarray gestured for them to join him at the table.
“Took you all long enough. Have a seat girls, I have a new prank. It’s not only an amazing way to announce ourselves to Equestria, but it’ll give some valuable insight on Team Harmony as well” exclaimed Disarray.
The girls looked at each other, smiling and taking seats across from the dragon. Each had a look of baited excitement on their face.
“Ok Disarray, we’re listening. What’s the prank?” Shadow said with a grin.
The dark drake materialized several folders, handing one to each of the other masters who opened them. As they read their smiles grew “You see” began Disarray “My plan is this…”
After a few minutes of explanation the girls were rolling around on the carpeted floor laughing their butts off. This was going to be absolutely hilarious. Each was looking foreward for the roles they’d individually get to play in bringing this plan to fruition.
“Nightmare Night was fun, but this, this is going to be nuts!” laughed Shadow
Disarray nodded “In the end we’ll get lots of information to; information we can use to craft even bigger and better pranks. We’ll make pranks ten times harder for them to defeat!”
“But isn’t that sorta cheatin?” asked Bad Seed.
Hymnphonic shook her head “We’re the bad guys now, remember? We’re not supposed to play fair. Besides, since the good guys are going to win in the end anyways, might as well make it as hard for them as possible”
Disarray frowned abit, deep in thought “I’m confident the prank part will work. What kinda worries me is having to directly confront Team Harmony. I’m not sure if we’re strong enough yet. I’m not sure if I’m strong enough yet. I mean, last time we just got a mob to handle them, and I wasn’t even there for that, you girls were. Going head to head with Team Harmony though, are we really ready?”
“You are. We’ve gone over the basics of each of your power sets” replied Maelstrom. They had been sitting quietly watching their team work. “I’ve given you magic lessons and training. Sure, one could always use more training and we never stop learning, but you all are more than ready. Trust me,Team Harmony doesn’t stand a chance against you all. The only limit now is your own imaginations”
The rest of them nodded. They knew they were powerful, but just how powerful were they? This is so totally awesome!
The prank was a simple one. Simple but oh so very effective. However it wasn’t the effect that required all the planning, it was the execution. The prank had started the moment Celestia’s sun peeked over the horizon. Every half hour a new major city would fall prey to chaos, then the nearby town, and then the villages. It was past noon and nearly all Equestria had been affected. Nearly all but Canterlot and Ponyville. It was hilarious, all of Equestria being affected by chaos and the only ones who could stop it were none the wiser.
Disarray sat on the roof of the Castle of Friendship eating a large gem he materialized using his flames. He idley munched on his snack, watching the mountainside city in the distance. The Ponyville clock tower struck two, meaning it was almost time for the real show to begin. the next city to be affected was Vanhoover, and then finally Canterlot.
Over the past week in Canterlot, Princess Luna was becoming increasingly worried about her sister. Celestia had been acting very strange since the morning after Nightmare Night. She had become jittery, and paced around. Luna would often hear her mumbling to herself when she thought she was alone. Stranger still, Celestia was refusing to eat her favorite desserts after just the first bite. Inquiring as to why, the sun princess informed her younger sister that they all just tasted...off. Thinking it was an issue of labor, Celestia gave her royal bakers and confectionery staff a couple vacation days, thinking they were being overworked and stressed resulting in a decrease in skills. When that didn’t work, she fired all the staff and hired new ones. When that didn’t work she fired those and sent for new ones from neighboring countries.
Here in the present, Princess Luna was very worried about her older sister. Said older princess was currently sitting on the floor of her private chambers, weeping. The floor was littered with plates, sauces, and trays of sweets, cakes, and other desserts of all kinds. Each confectionery moursel having one bite taken out of it.
Luna laid on her sister’s bed and watched as Celestia slowly regained her composure and used her magic to take a slice of cake off a nearby cart. It was a 3 layer cake covered expertly with marshmallow cream icing, each layer of the cake having a different berry flavor; strawberry, blackberry, and blueberry. The cake had been decorated beautifully with fresh strawberries cut to look like small flowers. It was a very beautiful slice of cake. Princess Celestia took her special dessert fork, a small silver fork with her initials etched on, and brought a small bite of the cake to her mouth.
A mixture of confusion, disappointment, and sorrow crossed the princess of the sun’s face as she began crying again. “I...I don't understand why. They all taste good! They’re just as good as they always are! Why can’t I enjoy them anymore?! Everypony says they taste just as amazing as always if not better but to me they’re just so...inferior now. Why? Why why why?! I NEED MY DELICIOUS TREATS SO WHY CAN’T I ENJOY THEM ANYMORE?!?!?!”
Luna just sighed. While she was very worried about her sister, this was starting to get annoying. Personally, the moon princess had no real desire for sweet things. She understood the irony, as during her holiday it was what she was offered as tribute by children. Still, she never could understand her sister’s obsession over them. Even so, she tried a couple cakes in an attempt to calm Celestia down and couldn’t find anything wrong with them.
“Tia” said Luna “I love you, but this is really starting to become...excessive”
“But...but Lulu you don’t understand!” cried Celestia
“Then help me understand. When was the last time you ate something sweet that didn’t taste off”
Celestia stopped crying and thought for a moment before replying “The morning after Nightmare Night. I went to visit Twilight Sparkle and Spike, or Disarray as he’s calling himself now, to see if what you told me about him joining chaos was true. We talked and he had made me breakfast; some juice and these delicious pancakes. Oh, just remembering them, they were perfect. Absolutely perfect! So soft and fluffy, and he put these little...I think they were chocolate chips? They were a bit harder than chocolate chips...anyway, he put them in in the pancakes, and gave me a mug of syrup. A whole mug Lulu! He said it was bottomless and never ended. I asked him if I could have it, and he said he’d think about it. Back to those pancakes though. Luna, I don’t think I’ve ever tasted anything so perfect after all these thousands of years and…”
Celestia stopped talking as her mini speech was drowned out by Luna’s laughter. The princess of the night was rolling around on her sister’s bed, holding her midsection and even wheezing from laughing so hard. Celestia’s eyebrow twitched.
“What is so funny?! Do you find my suffering to be amusing?! Do you find it funny that my last good memory of sweets was a simple breakfast?!”
Luna couldn’t answer, still laughing hysterically. Celestia waited for her to finish, but after a couple minutes her patience was wearing thin.
“Luna…” she said “If you would please SHUT UP!!!”
Being yelled at seemed to jolk the moon princess and, after recovering a little, Luna reached over an placed a hand on her sisters shoulder. “I’m so sorry…”
“You’re forgiven, just tell me why you were laughing at me!” Celestia replied angrily
“What? Oh, no, I’m not sorry for laughing. This is hilarious. I’m sorry because I have some very bad news to tell you” Luna responded.
Celestia was about to comment on how it was rude and unsupportive, and maybe even cruel, for her younger sibling to laugh at her plight but Luna opened her mouth and what she said next killed any steam Celestia had built up.
“It would appear you’re the latest victim of the Candy of all Candies dear sister”
It was like Celestia’s whole world had shattered. Her mind tried to find fault with her sister’s statement. She didn’t want to accept it, she couldn’t accept it.
“No…” was all Celestia could whisper.
“Now, I’m sure he wasn’t trying to be cruel. I mean, yes this is a tad extreme but you ARE always complaining about your weight. I think he was trying to help you in his own twisted way” Luna said with a chuckle, mumbling amusingly “He really is embracing his new chaotic title”
Celestia just sat there, silent. A couple minutes ticked by until she calmly stood up, brushed herself off, and turned to look at her sister. Even though her demeanor was calm, a fire burned in her eyes.
“The dragon wants to play? Ok. He seems to have forgotten who he’s messing with, but I’ll remind him” she said calmly “I won’t tolerate this insult dear sister. No no. He will pay. HE. WILL. PAY!!!”
Luna just gave her older sister a deadpan expression. Celestia could be rather childish when it came to her sweets, and Luna just wasn’t in the mood to deal with her anymore right now. No, after all this it was time to retire to her own chambers for a nap.
She was about to leave when a Pegasus came crashing through the window, faceplanting right into several desserts. The two princesses watches as he slowly stood up and proceeded to walk backwards, stepping on another discarded dessert, slipping, and falling again.
“Sir, are you alright? What’s happening to you?”
The pegasus stood up once again, very shaky and scared. Trying to move yet again he ended up tumbling into a nearby wall. This time he just laid there, a slice of pie stuck to the top of his head.
“Your majesties! I risked my life flying here to beg for your help with a terrible curse that has befallen Cloudsdale just this morning! None of us can move properly! Every time we try going left we end up moving right. We try walking forwards and we go backward! Please your majesties, we need help! Our city is in complete chaos right now; we can’t move or work properly. Don’t even get me started on flying, it took me almost four hours to get here!
The princesses gave each other a concerned yet confused look
“I passed by several towns on the way here your majesties. I saw the same curse affecting all over them. They send emissaries as well.”
As if on cue, the three heard crashes all around the castle as various ponies flew through windows or into hedges around the grounds. It seemed a few got the same idea as the pegasus stallion and tried to fly towards Celestia’s chambers. Their aim wasn’t so lucky though, if the various thuds heard just outside off to the side of said window was any indication.
After helping the stallion out the door and onto a chair in the hallway, the two monarchs teleported to the throne room to confirm the story. It would seem what the pegasus said held true. From Maredrid to Manehatten, from Fillydelphia to Trottingham, nopony could move properly.
“Tia, I fear your plans of vengeance will have to wait. It seems our new god of chaos has made their official first move”
Celestia nodded with a sigh “It would seem so. Try to keep things organized here while I go to Ponyville and alert Twilight and her friends. I also need to teach her how to send scrolls via magic, since she cant use messenger flame anymore”
Without missing a beat, both princesses moved into action. Celestria raced over to her royal chariot and upon her single command “To Ponyville!” they were off.
They were just clearing Canterlot proper and nearing the city limits when the they were hit by a wave of energy. The large clock and bell tower of Canterlot chimed the half past the hour when the both pegasus stallions pulling the royal chariot lost control, careening down and crashing into the front yard of a noble’s mansion.
Celestia shook her head, recovering from the accident “Are either of you hurt?” she asked.
The two guards groaned their answer and tried to stand up and help their princess. However, as soon as they had taken their first step they were tripping and stumbling over each other, ending up as a tangled heap on the ground. The same could be said for the various staff of the mansion whom had tired to come see if everypony in the crash was ok.
Celestia tried to get up and go over to her guards to check on them but ended up stumbling over herself and falling down again as soon as she tried moving.
“Oh great, now I’m affected” she grumbled, getting back up onto her hooves. She decided to test the waters a bit and dusted off her clothes. It was weird, mentally moving in the opposite way she’d normally want to move. Feeling she had at least a loose grasp on what was going on, she decided the only way to get to ponyville now was to walk. Slowly she moved one leg forward, and then the other. It was difficult, she had to really concentrate. She debated teleporting, but since she wasn’t sure how this ‘curse’ worked, she didn’t want to risk it and end up struck in a wall somewhere or worse. So she kept walking. What should have been only an hour long walk took her three as she had to move slowly as to not trip herself up.
Disarray spotted the alicon from his perch atop the castle of friendship and smiled. He teleported in front of her, just outside the town. Nearby, under a tree, Maelstrom slept under a large sombrero. Celestia looked towards the drake, and then the chaos god, and then back at the drake, raising an eyebrow.
“Well, you’re late. They got tired of waiting and took a nap. Better late than never I suppose. Still, I thought it only took an hour to walk from Canterlot to Ponyville” he said mockingly.
“Oh har har” replied Celestia, glaring at the drake “Also, I’ll get you back for those pancakes!”
Disarray only grinned “Now now princess, I was just doing you a favor. Once you shed all those extra pounds you’re always complaining about, you’ll thank me. I think you’ll also appreciate your royal guards no longer saying ‘Praise the Sun’ as they watch you walk away.”
Celestia’s eyes widened, twitching abit “THAT’S why they were always saying that?!”
“Opps~” teased Disarray “Well, now you know. Your habit of wearing white sundresses sometimes leaves your bright yellow cutiemark visible, especially with your tighter clothes. I supposed I’m the first person with the balls big enough to tell you this. I mean who’s going to tell their ruler, a goddess of the sun, that they can see through her rather form fitting clothing. But I digress, we’re talking about the size of your assets, not what they’re clothed in. Look, I’m only saying, just because you’re the princess of the sun doesn’t mean your butt has to be as big as one. Even though the royal flank helps many a soldier stand at attention. Though, your habit of wearing thongs surely doesn’t hurt any.”
A vein bulged on Celestia’s forehead out of pure irritation and embarrassment. Surely her rear wasn’t THAT big. Also, what's wrong with wearing thongs?! They are comfy! The nerve of this dragon, talking to her like that!
It was at this point Maelstrom decided to jolt awake.
“Huh, wha….someone talking about Celestia’s extra big booty?” they said sleepily, getting up and poofing the hat away. Seeing the other two, they smiled and floated over “Ah, I see you took your sweet time getting here. Must be tough lugging all that badonkadonk around.”
The vein on Celestia’s forehead was bulging so much one might think it would rupture. Before she could open her mouth to stay something back, Maelstrom spoke up again.
“Anywho, you’re late! I had to hold off the finale just to wait for you to get here.” they said. “I already told her boss” Disarray said while folding his arms over his chest
Mael nodded and grinned, snapping their fingers. In a cloud of goldust, Team Harmony teleported in. They looked around confused until they spotted the princess staring angrily at the Mael and Disarray. Rushing over to Celestia they each took a stance between her and the two members of Team Chaos.
“Why is the princess here? What did you two do?!” demanded Twilight
“Oh, lots and lots” replied Disarray.
“And we’re going to do lots more” said Maelstrom as the Ponyville clock struck the top of the hour. An energy wave shot off from the tower and washed over ponyville. Roseluck, who could be seen a little ways away, walking with a water pail, suddenly stumbled and fell. She slowly managed to stand up, and tried dusting herself off. Instead of a normal downward motion she instead made upward ones, sweeting dust and dirt in her face. Coughing she tried to move forward to reach her nearby water pail but instead moved backways, tripped over a rock, and falling again. Panicking now, she shakely but quickly got to her hooves and tried to run back to her house, but instead ran backwards at full speed, crashing again. Team Harmony just watched the whole display in confusion and Celestia just groaned.
“Now now, don’t go getting all grumbly yet, I have some ponies I want you all to meet” said Disarray, holding up a hand and snapping his fingers. In a green flash three black ponies appeared, the same black ponies from Nightmare Night. They smiled evilly and stared at Team Harmony with their solid colored eyes. They moved up to each of their rivals, reaching out and shaking their hands. The first to speak was the earth pony, standing in front of Applejack
“Well, howdy” the black pony said, mimicking Applejack’s greeting. “Ah’m Bad Seed, it’s real nice to meet mah rival face to face like this, ya know, without a mob of young’uns trampling ya down. Maelstrom gave me all of yer strength, stamina, endurance, and agility. Ah also have the power to warp and twist nature to mah will, along with some other surprises.”
The pegasus in front of Rainbow Dash grinned and spoke up next “You can call me Shadow Blitz, I control the weather with the full power of chaos! I’m also a flyer faster than you, so good luck catching up to stop me”
Lastly the unicorn took Rarity’s hand and gave a small curtsy “I am Hymnphonic” she said in her weird triple voice “I’m your rival Rarity, your evil counterpart if you will. My gift is that of music; my melodious voice will make ponies do the craziest things! I’m also a very talented magic user, if I do say so myself. Maelstrom has granted me all the magical power of a pre-alicorn Twilight Sparkle.”
“Don’t worry Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, I’ll be locating some rivals for you real soon” Mael spoke up “You will find that I don’t think like Discord; doing things solo all the time. No, my goal is to create a full six person team to face off against you lot”
Disarray folded his arms as the trio moved to stand at his sides, smirking at the speechless Team Harmony
“What was that you said Princess? Oh yea; unlimited power is no substitute for true friendship” he said mockingly, wrapping his arms around Hymn and Seed’s waist, pulling them in for a sideways hug “I couldn’t agree more. Anyways, we have tons of chaos and confusion to create, so if you’ll excuse us..”
With that, Team Chaos teleported away. Team Harmony just continued to stare at the spot they had been standing. A new god of chaos, plus a full team of six lesser gods of mayhem. This was bad, this was really really bad. Celestia looked over at her ex-student now fellow princess.
“Twilight, I’ll be honest with you...I’m genuinely concerned about Equestria’s future.” she said.
“As am I” replied Twilight, before smirking “At least I would be if this weren’t so easy! They brought us all together! All we have to do is fire our rainbow powers and everything is fixed! Wow, all this build up and they really dropped the ball!”
The rest of Team Harmony nodded and before Celestia could warn them, tried to move into a circle. All they ended up doing was tripping over each other and landing in a heap. There was laughter as Maelstrom floated a little off to the side, watching the whole incident.
“You really thought we forgot about your harmony powers?! Haha no, I just wanted to see all of you fall on your faces! Well, I had my fun, now for the game to officially begin!” they said, snapping their fingers. Before the girls could protest they were poofed away, only Celestia remaining.
“I’d recommend you go to the town square, that’s where all the fun is going to be” suggested Mael.
“And why should I heed anything you say?” questioned Celestia, raising a brow
“Go. Or don’t. I personally don’t care, the choice is yours. I’m just telling you where the main event is most likely going to be. You could always just head back home. What was it, a three hour walk?” Mael replied with a shug before teleporting away.
With a huff Celestia concentrated, moving one hoof at a time, her hands at her sides, her eyes on the road leaning into Ponyville. She could hear all the chaos happening in the town. She had to hurry!
Team Harmony had expected to be flung into some deep cave, or some arena facing some chaotic beast, but when each opened their eyes they saw they were in fact in their own homes. At first this gave them feelings of relief, until they realized they now had to find each other just to undo this huge mess. All the while, Team Chaos was out there doing who knows what.
Rainbow Dash had managed to get herself to the front door of her cloud house. She figured out that trying to move backwards was the way to move forwards, but now comes the hardest part; figuring out flight. Walking may be one thing, but one can’t just do all the tiny adjustments wings make while in flight in reverse. She spent her whole life practicing how to go forward fast, flapping them slowly in reverse was going to be a challenge. If she can just make it to the ground, she’ll walk the rest of the way. Dash didn’t like not being able to fly, but she needed to get to her friends.
Rainbow Dash was deep in thought when a shadow past overhead. Most accurately, Shadow was looping around in the air above Dash, taunting her as the cyan pegasus slowly flapped her wings and became airborne. She tried her best to ignore the taunts and jeers as she slowly descended to the ground. She tried her best, she tried so hard, but her pride just couldn’t take it. Turning her head up to the sky, she called out the the pony above her.
“You talk a big game, but you don’t have the guts to come down here and say that to my face!”
Shadow Blitz zipped down, hovering right at eye level in front of Rainbow Dash. “You think so?” she asked “Because I do, and I will. I said you’re slow. I said that you were a washed up has-been before you even became a wonderbolt. I said I’ll always be faster than you…”
Dash could feel her blood boiling, being insulted like that. Shadow could see the rage on Dash’s face and just grinned, leaning in real closely “and if you want to prove me wrong. Just race me. Here and now, we’ll see who’s faster. Rather, more accurately, we’ll see just how much you’ll lose. How far behind me will you be? Three seconds? Five? I’m personally banking on ten second flat. Wanna do it, don’t you? Lets race then. Readysetgo!”
With that, Shadow took off like a black bolt through the sky. Rainbow Dash, who was already fuming and wouldn’t, couldn’t, step down such an insulting challenge, beat her wings hard to catch up. However, instead of flying forward, she shot backwards at full speed, right into a pink cloud made of bubblegum. She flailed and struggled but it only seemed to get her more stuck. Shadow Blitz just casually flew back, laughing the whole way.
“That was just way too easy” the shadow pony said between chuckles.
“That’s not fair, you tricked me! This is cheating! Get me out of this!” Dash screamed angrily, struggling with the bubblegum that was wrapped around her limbs, stuck to her clothes, and in her hair, tail, and feathers. She glared at Shadow, who only smiled in response.
‘What kind of pony would betray her own kind to join the likes of chaos’ Dash wondered to herself. She knew the answer though. After all, that’s all Chaos was; cheaters and traitors.
Shadow just shook her head with a smile “Cheating? I’m the bad guy, remember? Anyways, I have other things to do, but don’t worry, I’ll push you where you need to go.”
With that, Shadow placed her hands on the side of the cloud and began using her large wings to push and set Dash and the cloud adrift towards the town square.
“I’ll get you Shadow!” Dash’s voice called out as she drifted away.
Over at Sweet Apple Acres, Applejack had just made it to front gate and the path that lead right back into town. On the way, she passed her brother as he attempted to complete his daily chores. That was going about as well as one would expect. Still, she admired him for not giving up, and neither would she. Progress was slow, as she had to concentrate on every step she took, but she was never the type to shy away from some hard work. She had passed an old wagon on the side of the road and thought for a few seconds about trying to use it to get back into town faster, but decided against it. It was best keep with the method that was working instead of trying to come up with some crazy stunt. After almost twenty five minutes, she was nearly halfway to town. She saw somepony down the path walking towards her and was about to call out to them until she realized who it was.
Bad Seed waved at Applejack, stopping just a few feet away. Applejack took a defencive stance, not sure what this self proclaimed rival of her’s was going to do. She didn’t trust this mare.
“So, yer here ta stop me?” asked Applejack. Bad Seed just smiled and nodded.
“Well, ah don’t believe fer a second yer as strong as me. Ah think yer just full of it!” Applejack proclaimed. “I think yer lyin!”
Applejack knew this was a bad idea. It was obvious this ‘Bad Seed’ wasn’t affected by the chaos magic, so a full out brawl would be not be in the farmmare’s favor. However, Applejack couldn’t accept the claim that this dark pony was as strong as she was. Next to Big Mac, she was one of the strongest ponies in equestria! No, this had to be some sort of trick to try and throw her off her game. That’s all chaos is after all, lies and tricks.
With her resolve hardened, Applejack began clumsily running towards Bad Seed who just stood there and grinned. With a yell, Applejack threw a punch in the dark pony’s general direction, only for said pony to just side-step and trip her. Only slightly phased after tumbling and eating dirt, Applejack shakely got back to her feet “low down dirty trick. Come on and fight me normal-like!” she yelled, momentarily forgetting the backwards prank effecting her. She tried charging forward, only to tumble backwards and fall over again. Hearing laugher, Applejack scowled and turned to face her ‘rival’, only to be pelted in the face with something and covered in...was this apple juice?
Confused, her anger temporarily forgotten, Applejack watched as Bad Seed plucked an apple from a nearby tree.
“Hey! Those aren’t yers! That’s stealin!” the farmmare complained.
“Bad guy, remember?” replied Seed, smiling as the apple in her hand warped and expanded. Applejack could see it starting to slosh as it filled with more and more apple juice. Before she could react, Bad Seed pulled back her arm and fast balled the overfilled apple right at Applejack, pelting her in the face again. Sputtering, Applejack got to her hooves, using her hands to get some of the juice out her eyes. An apple hit her in the stomach, and she fell down again with a grunt.
Ok, before she was annoyed. Now, now she’s truly pissed. All that anger came back with a vengeance and Applejack glared at Seed as the dark pony plucked another apple, her chaos magic swelling it up.
“Don’t ya dare throw another one at me!” Applejack said through clenched teeth.
Bad Seed grinned. “Ok, ah won’t” she said, dropping the apple, which splatted when it made contact with the ground.
That was it? That’s all it took? Applejack starred both angry and confused until Bad Seed held up her hand and snapped her fingers. The apples on all the nearby trees began to swell. They swelled so big they began to hang like bright red juice filled party balloons. Applejack was wide eyed, directing her attention back at Bad Seed.
“Ya said ya wouldn’t ya liar!” she said, standing back up with new found vigor. She really hated liars.
“Ah said I wouldn’t and ah won’t. Didn’t say ‘nothin bout the trees though” Bad Seed responded with a giggle.
Before Applejack could say anything more, she was pelted in the back of the head. Falling face first into the dirt, she managed to get on her knees before being pelted again in the side, falling over. She looked around frantically to try to get eyes on her attacker when she saw one of the trees themselves pull back one of its branches and sling several apples at her. Most of them missed but one got her in the face again.
“Well, mah work here is done” Bad Seed said, turning away and walking back down the path towards Ponyville.
“Wait! Ya can’t jus-” Applejack tried to call out, but never got the chance. As soon as Bad Seed was out of range, the trees seem to take this as a queue to begin attacking all at once. Applejack desperately crawled through a hailstorm of overfilled apples and sticky mud made from dirk and apple juice. She concentrated the best she could to move as quickly as possible, even though she kept getting plastered over and over again. One thing was crystal clear in her mind; she really really disliked that Bad Seed.
Rarity was fairing a little better at Carousel Boutique. Fortunately, her shop and home was wasn’t that far from Twilight’s castle, however she felt the best course of action would be to get to town square. It made the most sense as the best meeting place, if her friends had indeed been teleported to their own homes.
She had made it out her shop no problem, and was slowly making her way down the street when she noticed a green flash off to her right. Turning, she saw Hymnphonic walk up next to her. They stayed silent for a few minutes, Rarity concentrating on walking forward and Hymnphonic just keeping pace casually. Finally, the fashionista couldn’t take it anymore and turned to her ‘rival’.
“If you’re going to fight me or try to stop me, pleeeaase don’t ruin my hair! It takes too long to get just right again” she said.
The shadow pony just gasped, looking at Rarity in disbelief “My word, I wouldn’t DREAM of doing something so crass. A lady doesn’t go around getting filthy in scuffles!” she replied.
Rarity felt a wave of relief wash over her. Maybe her rival wasn’t so evil after all. Could she have been wrong about her thoughts of Chaos being nothing but messy and unrefined? The mare next to her definitely dressed well; in a style of dress Rarity had never seen before that gave the mare a sense of sexuality and mystery while keeping her air of sophistication and high class.
They kept walking and Hymnphoic began singing a wordless song. Her odd triple voice made each note haunting and alluring. All the ponies around them, who were just trying to focus on moving around correctly, began believing themselves to be cats and dogs and started behaving as such. They ran around trying to chase each other crashing into everything, creating messes and total chaos.
“Must you?” asked Rarity with a sigh
Hymn just smiled “Yes, I must. Oh, and before I forget. The ‘dogs’ all see you as a bitch in heat. Have fun with that, ta-ta” she said before teleporting away.
Rarity stopped walking and turned to look at the stallions around her. They each were looking at her with a hunger in their eyes, some even had their tongues hanging out of their mouths. Normally, Rarity was used to and somewhat adored this kind of attention; that of stallions drooling and tripping themselves up over her. However, this situation was less than ideal.
She began walking again, noticing that the affected stallions were now following her, rather large bulges in their pants. Again, something she wasn’t totally against, but the situation wasn’t the best. She picked up the pace, and so did they as best they could. Soon she was running down the street as fast as she could without falling, which really wasn’t that fast. From the sky, it started raining various flavors of juice, soaking everything and making it all sticky. The stallions following her gave chase the best they could, which meant tripping over each other and themselves and ending up in one large barking heap. This gave Rarity the chance she needed to get away, but she was soaked to the fur with juice, causing dirk, dust, stray leaves, and bits of hay to end up stuck to her as she hurried towards the town square. Worse still...
“Nooooo my hair!” whined Rarity
It was a rather comical sight that two shadow ponies watched from the safety of a nearby roof, giggling to themselves.
In the Castle of Friendship, Twilight had managed to get from her room, down a couple flights of stairs, and was slowly making her way across the main hallway to the front door. She had thought about just teleporting, but unsure how her magic was affected by this crazy backwards prank, thought better of it. So instead she elected to walking.
Waiting by the front door was Disarray, slow clapping.
“Congrats on making it this far Twi, keep at it. You can do it.” teased the drake
“So you’re supposed to be the one stopping me Spike?” asked Twilight
“Disarray, and that’s right. I am YOUR rival, after all”
“Wait, YOU? Sp-er Disarray, no offence by I’m an alicorn princess, and you’re just a baby dragon. That doesn’t seem at all fair” said Twilight matter-of-factly.
Disarray clenched his fist seemingly about to say something. He slowly relaxed and smirked, letting loose a breath of purple flames that filled the hallway. Twilight instantly raised a defensive barrier, the kind her older brother Shining Armor had taught her. To her surprise the flames passed right through and she gave a small yelp, closing her eyes and fearing the worst. Her own baby brother was going to burn her to a crisp! After a couple seconds, she realized she wasn’t dead or even in any pain. Opening her eyes, she saw everything looking as normal as ever, no even better. The walls and floor looked extra clean. Whatever he was trying to do, she managed to stop him after all!
His work done, Disarray moved over and opened the door. He stepped out, stopping only to glance back at Twilight. He raised his brow as she gave him a smug smile. Twilight took a step forward and slipped, falling on her butt. Looking around confused, she tried to stand up but ended up slipping and falling again. She tried moving herself over to something to help her pull herself up but her hands and hooves couldn't get any sort of traction on the extra slick floor. A look of realizing crossed over her face as it dawned on her. This is what Disarray did. She looked at him with realization and he in turn gave her a smug smile.
The black dragon turned and started walking away, leaving a flailing Twilight slipping around on the floor.
“Hey! Wait! You can’t just leave me like this! This isn’t fair!” cried Twilight
Disarray just looked back and smirked “You’re a big strong alicorn princess, I’m sure you can figure it out” he said, walking out the door.
Twilight struggled for a few more minutes before giving up. She tried moving on all fours, using swimming motions, and even attempting to skate across the floor. None of it worked, the surface was too slick and with this backwards prank her coordination was completely off. Laying on her back, she wondered how she was going to get out of this. This may have been a tricky situation but she’d been through much worse. She’ll find a solution, she always does.
Minutes ticked by and the purple princess was lost in her thoughts. She thought about this new god of chaos and their influence over her baby brother. She thought of those mysterious mares Spike, er, Disarray was associating with. Who were they? Could they be trusted? Anyone who willingly sided with chaos had to be evil, right? But Spi-Disarray had said he willing chose to join. Then there was the matter of this whole prank thing. This backwards prank is going to get some ponies seriously hurt. She couldn’t give up, she was a princess and needed to put a stop to this madness!
With newfound determination she began thinking of ways to get out of this predicament. The main issue were these slick floors. If she could just make it out her door, it’s a short walk to the town square. She figured if the rest of her friends had been teleported to their homes as well, the town square would be the most obvious place to meet up. So first things first, she needed to find a way to walk down the hallway and out the door. Disarray had left it open, probably to tease her, being so close to her goal but unable to move towards it.
When times were dire like this, she would usually read a relevant book, or write a letter to Princess Celestia for advice. It’s a shame she can’t do either right now. She wondered how Celestia was doing, and if team chaos had done to her what they had done to the elements. Though, teleporting the solar princess back home wouldn’t do much other than save her a trip.
Wait! A Letter! No, rather parchment! She could use a scroll to create a path to walk on! The idea was so simple, she wondered why she didn’t come up with it sooner. She closed her eyes and concentrated, her horn glowing as she reached out to find what she needed. From down the hallway, out the library doors, floated a large scroll. It moved over towards the doorway, before falling to the ground and unrolling towards Twilight; effectively creating a parchment paper path for the perplexed purple princess to use to get out of her particularly peculiar predicament.
Twilight slowly stood up on the paper. Success! At least, it would have been had the paper itself not start to slip on the floor. Freezing in place, she sighed in relief as she tested her center of balance. This wasn’t going to be as easy as she thought, but at least now she had a fighting chance. It was like walking on a tightrope almost, she had to concentrate on stepping on the middle of the paper as to not cause it to slip right or left. Using her wings to help balance, she slowly made her way out of her castle and towards the town square. Seemed Disarray underestimated her resourcefulness! Either way, it was time to find her friends and save the day.
Once she managed to get out of her castle, it was a relatively easy and short walk to the center of town. As it turns out, Twilight was right. Two of her friends were already there waiting for her. Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie were sitting on the steps of Town Hall, casually talking to both Princess Celestia and Disarray. Maelstrom was off to the side napping under a sombrero. Hearing yelling, she looked up and say Rainbow Dash on the roof, stuck to...was that a large wad of bubblegum? Twilight shook her head. It was time to end this, just need to wait on the final two friends. She just hoped they were ok.
Her answer came in the form of a loudly complaining Rarity walking towards the group. Her normally white fur was a pale purple. Her clothes were covered in patches of dirt and the occasional odd leaf, along with her messed up hair. The look on her face was nothing short of furious as she marched up to Disarray.
“Disarray! I will not, no, CANNOT forgive this! It rained grape juice of all things, getting me all filthy and soaked! Do you have any idea how much time it’ll take to get all this out of my fur?! Also, this outfit, the fabric is completely ruined! AND MY HAIR!!!”
Before she could continue, Disarray held up a hand “I don’t do weather, that’s Shadow Blitz’s thing. If you have a problem, that’s who you gotta complain to”
“But you’re the team leader right? You come up with all the plans” Pinkie said, moving over and poking Maelstrom who woke up “Or are you the one responsible? You pull the strings, huh puppetmaster? Huh?! HUH?!” she asked the chaos god, giving them a comical evil eye that just made the god laugh.
Standing up and floating over to the group, Maelstrom answered the question “I may provide the power, I may be their boss, but I don’t control the Masters of Mayhem. They do what they want”
Disarray nodded “And I don’t come up with detailed plans, just prank ideas and suggestions on where the other Masters should be for the best impact. Anything beyond that is whatever they choose to do”
Twilight was about to say something about responsibility for one’s friends, and guilt by association, but was stopped as the group spotted Applejack walking into the square. The farmmare was covered in mud, from hair to hooves. It was Fluttershy who rushed over to check on her, asking if she was ok and what happend.
“...Applejuice…” was all Applejack said as she marched over to Maelstrom and Disarray. “Where is that Bad Seed?! Ah have some choice words for her!”
Disarray and Maelstrom snickered and Mael spoke up “All in good time. For now, you’re the last to arrive. So, with all of you here let me say congratulations to all of you for finally making it. You did it! You can now make with the harmony and stop this prank” they said as they teleported Rainbow Dash down to the ground.
“Just like that? No tricks?” asked Twilight warily.
Mael shook their head “Nope, just go for it, I’m actually rather bored and disappointed” they said, pulling out a clipboard and looking over some charts “The results were...less than ideal”
Team Harmony shrugged and carefully moved together into a circle, holding hands and concentrating. Their eyes glowed white and a rainbow blast fired out in a shockwave, spreading to all corners of equestria.
The prank was done, everything was set right. Team Harmony gave each other hugs and talked with Princess Celestia. Maelstrom was just shaking their head sadly.
“These figures; just terrible. It seems I greatly overestimated the team’s abilities because these results are just...embarrassing” said Mael.
“I’m terribly sorry boss. I’ll redo the the figures, and adjust the data” Disarray responded.
Even if he was her ‘rival’ now, Twilight wouldn’t standby and let any being talk to her baby brother like that. “Don’t you berate Spi-Disarray like that! What he did was actually really clever! We won because we’re the good guys and Harmony will always win. Disarray, is this really the ‘kind and supportive’ boss you were talking about? Because I must say, I’m not impressed!”
Maelstrom and Disarray gave Twilight a confused look before Mael spoke up “I’m not talking about Disarray and Team Chaos, they preformed spectacularly; I’m talking about you lot. This prank should have been wrapped up in around ten minutes at the MOST. It took you all over four hours. I’m including you Celestia”
Team Harmony just stared as Mael floated over and began reading from the clipboard “I’ll let Rarity slide this time, but Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Twilight, this is just embarrassing. Applejack, you should have used that wagon to get to town faster. If you had, Bad Seed wouldn’t have gotten bored and went to go mess with you. Seriously, have you no sense of urgency? The wagon was your best bet to get to town fast”
Applejack frowned and was about to say something before she closed her mouth and sighed. She had thought about using the wagon too, but thought her current method was good enough. If it ain’t broke don’t fix it, right?
“Rainbow Dash, do I really need to say it? You got to get better control of that ego of yours, your friends were counting on you and you fell for an obvious trick” Mael berated.
Rainbow Dash just looked down “She kept saying she was faster than me…” she said.
“Finally, Twilight. This is probably the worst results yet. Disarray kept going on and on about how smart you were, but you seem to lack basic problem solving skills. I don’t blame you completely though, Celestia seems to lack the same basic skills.”
Twilight and Celestia gave an angry glare to Mael, opening their mouths to voice complaints until Maelstrom asked them a simple question “Why didn’t either of you just teleport?”
“B-But...the prank...and everything was backwards...and I thought it was too dangerous, because you know, backwards magic!” Twilight stuttered
“But magic wasn’t backwards. In fact, the only thing that was backwards were ponies. Fluttershy realized that right from the start after seeing her animals moving normally and just had her pet bear carry her. She was the third one here after Pinkie Pie and Celestia. Also, you both really have no excuse. Celestria, did you even test your magic to see if it was affected or did you just assume? Twilight, you initially didn’t test yours either but later you USED levitation magic get that scroll, so you should have realized you could have teleported. On that note, why didn’t you think of just levitating YOURSELF out of your castle? This of course isn’t even touching on the fact that you all meeting here was more of a fluke than anything, as you had no ways of contacting each other to let them know where to meet up”
The two princesses were speechless. The answers really were that simple, and their mistakes were really that obvious.
“So yea, this should have been a ten minute prank. Celestia teleports to Ponyville, we teleport Team Harmony together, give an evil monologue, Teleport them apart, and then Twilight just teleports to each of her friends and teleports them to a single location. Harmony magic, and done. But no, wow. We greatly overestimated Team Harmony. Everything from here on out is going to be a cakewalk.”
Team Harmony just stared at each other as Disarray and Maelstrom teleported away, both of them shaking their heads mumbling “this is going to be way too easy”
Twilight turned to Celestia “We won...but why do I feel like we failed somehow…”
Shaking her head, the princess of the sun just sighed “Before I forget, let me teach you how to magically send and receive scrolls...”
Chapter 3 - Dies Insanus Ianuam
Twilight was in an incredibly good mood. After an extra two weeks of going over every last item of inventory, checking every page of the catalogs, double checking the index, and writing rather long letters to editorials all across Equestria; she was finally prepared to re-open her new library to the public. While the library had technically already been complete over four weeks prior by her ex-assistant now rival, she believed it only proper to give everything a once over to to make sure there were no hidden pranks or any such mischief.
The purple princess felt it only fair, given her baby brother’s new position as public menace number two. It didn't help that his team had kept busy, pulling small pranks all across Equestria.
The pink eyed pegasus would constantly cause the weather to go crazy forcing an entire weather team correct the issue. She's cause it to rain, snow, and hail all sorts of random things and turn clouds into random substances. She once turned Rainbow Dash's cloud house into soap bubbles.
The red eyed earth mare would cause crops to grow out of control and go haywire, that would require the elements of harmony show up and zap the out of control plants to get them back to normal. She also had a habit of leaving these weird black apples out for ponies. Reports say that these apples to both taste funny and seem to have random effects simplular, to but more exagerated than, that of poison joke. Fortunately these effects went away by themselves after around four hours.
Then there was the green eyed unicorn. She was constantly popping up in random towns, singling and getting people to do the craziest things. When the Elements finally shows up to stop her, she's nowhere in sight and everypony is back to normal.
There was the time it rained hayburders. The Water Balloon Incident. The Noodle Incident. The time a village's supply of corn threw a hoedown. Then there was the event at the royal orchestra in Canterlot where they made every intrument sound like a kazzoo! It was all just so exhusting!
Now wasn't the time for all that though, now was the time for happy thoughts. Sitting in one of the armchairs, Twilight imagined the library full of adults browsing shelves, eagar children thirsty for knowledge, and even parents helping their foals pick out their first books. The thought of ponies sharing and gaining knowledge warmed her heart.
She was struck with a sudden realization. With her castle being mostly empty, there’s nothing preventing her from expanding on this library either. Knock down a wall or two and she could double its size. Take out a ceiling, and all of a sudden the library is three stories instead of two.
She bit her bottom lip just thinking about it; her library getting bigger and bigger, storing more and more books. She could have the largest library in all of Equestria. Why stop there though? Storing books is one thing, what if she were to start making them. Oh, her own library AND publishing plant? She felt herself getting hot under the collar at the thought of all those fresh new books, hot off the printing press. That new book smell.
Twilight shivered a little, getting up and moving over to the librarian’s desk. The bookshelf behind it held her personal favorites. She lovingly stroked the spine of How To Not Be Wrong: The Power of Mathematical Thinking . Twilight imagined making hundreds of these, thousands. Her breathing deepened as she thought about it.
A small voice interrupted her daydream “Hi Princess! I would like to borrow these books on advanced spell theory please!”
Twilight straighten her new clothes the best she could and quickly wiped her mouth when she realized she had been drooling a little. Thankful that her back was to the visitor she couldn’t help but give a small condescending smile, as the voice belonged to that of a little filly
“I’m sorry” she said without even glancing back at the one talking to her “but those books are way to advanced for little foals like yourself. They’re for much older and more powerful unicorn mages who’ve been studies for years and years. Without the proper training and tutorage you wouldn’t even be able to understand the content in those books. While I admire your enthusiasm, you need to begin with the basics. I’d recommend a copy of My First Spellbook for starters”
“Oh come on, We both know I can handle it. After all, I’m supposed to have all the power and knowledge you did right before your ascension.”
Twilight quickly turned around with a gasp, realizing who it was. “You!”
“Me!”
“You’re one of the Menace Masters….um….Symphony?”
“Mayhem. We’re the Masters of Mayhem. Also my name is Hymphonic”
“Oh, right”
Twilight watched in slight awe as Hymn grew before her eyes, going from a small filly to a young adult in a matter of seconds. “Was that some sort of illusion magic? It was very good”
“I can adjust how old or young I look. Just another perk of being an immortal lesser god. Anyway, about those books…” Hymn said with a smirk
“Look, I don’t think it’s a good idea…” said Twilight. A part of her felt bad for keeping somepony from gaining precious knowledge however another part didn’t want to give said precious knowledge to her new enemy. Such an internal struggle.
“Why not? It is because I’m a Master of Mayhem? You can’t prevent me you know. There's nothing stopping me from just grabbing these books and leaving but I'm trying to be civil. This is both a government building and public library, and anypony with a library card can borrow materials from here.” said Hymn with a hand on her hips and a ‘hmph!’
Twilight couldn’t help but grin. Hymnphonic slipped up and she got her!
“You’re right of course. Anypony with an OFFICIAL LIBRARY CARD is more than welcome to borrow books and materials. However, since you don’t have an official library card…”
Hymn calmly held out her hand, seeming pulling a card from thin air and showing it to Twilight, who could only stare and stutter. This card couldn’t be real!
She was half expecting some sort of trick, maybe Disarray authorizing a card behind her back, but this wasn’t a local library card. This was a special access government issued one. This card allows the bearer access to any library or archive across Equestria no questions asked. Only a handful of ponies though history had a card like this, mainly the royal family and various top scholars and mages such as Starswirl the Bearded; the first person to be granted such a card. Celestia had been very strict about who could be granted one; Twilight didn’t even get approved for her’s until after her ascension. How did Hymphonic get her hands on one?
“So, can I borrow those books now?” the shadow pony in question asked.
“I...um...I mean…” Twilight stuttered before collecting herself “I’m sorry, but since that card is obviously fake, I can’t allow you to borrow any books”
Without any hesitation, Hymphonic leaned over the desk and tapped the card against a clear flat crystal. The crystal shined white verifying the validity of the card and Hymphonic smirked “Seems real to me” she said, taking the books and placing them in a bag she conjured up with a flash of magic.
“Now, if you’ll excuse me, we’re having a very important meeting and I’m already late because of this” said the emerald shadow mare.
“W-wait! How do you have one of those cards?!” Twilight practically screamed.
Hymn rolled her eyes “It’s almost like I work for a being who can conjure up anything out of thin air…” With that, Hymphonic teleported away, leaving an irked princess.
“Well, looks like I’d better send a message to the girls and tell them we should probably prepare ourselves for some sort of trouble…and have a talk with Celestia about changing our system” grumbled Twilight, who couldn’t help but feel that her literary sanctum had somehow been violated.
Hymphonic arrived at the CMC clubhouse appearing as her old self, Sweetie Belle. It was a look that she more and more felt was just a disguise rather than who she was. Still, it came in handy when wanting to stay incognito. Looking around to make sure the older Apple siblings weren’t nearby, she quickly made her way into the old shack that served as their temporary HQ. The other Masters were already inside waiting for her.
“Took ya long enough Hymn. Ah started to think ya weren’t coming” teased Seed.
“And miss traveling to another reality? There’s no way!” Hymn responded, placing her bag of books on the table.
“What's up with the books?” asked Disarray, picking one up.
“Well, I’m supposed to represent the chaotic state of magic, right? You know, push the boundaries, inspire change, and all that. Well, sure I have all this knowledge and power, and with the training I’m getting stronger, but I wasn’t sure how far ponykind has gotten magic wise. I wanted to see the latest research so I can try to do things nopony has ever seen before” Hymn responded.
“You’re really taking this seriously” Disarray said with a smirk “That makes me glad”
Hymn blushed a little “well, of course I am, it’s my job after all” she said, taking the book from Disaray and putting it back in the bag, thankful Disarray didn't look through ALL the books she got. She didn't want to have to explain Flames of the Heart: A Beginner's Guide to Romance .
Before either of them could say anything else Maelstrom appeared, a huge smile on their face.
“Are my Masters of Mayhem ready to see their new workspace?” they asked.
The four cheered excitedly. Maelstrom had taken an extra few days to make sure everything was just right for them. The team could tell their boss was just as excited to show them The Company’s HQ as much they were excited to see it. The air itself seemed electric with exhilaration.
“Now, before we get going, I’m going to teach you all a new skill. A power you didn’t know you had” Mael said, floating over to the shack’s old wooden door. “It’s called Insanus Ianuam ”
Grinning, Maelstrom opened the door. However, instead of being greeted by the pleasant Sweet Apple Acres they were instead hit with a wave of snow and cold air from the frozen north. Mael shut the door and opened it again, revealing a desert. They shut and opened it again, revealing a deep cave.
Closing the door a final time, they turned to their team “Also known as Crazy Doors, this power will allow you to open gateways to wherever you want in your universe; and when you get experienced enough, beyond it”
“That is so cool!” screamed Shadow and Seed.
Hymphonic was so excited she was shaking and Disarray kept looking from the door to his boss, a huge grin on his face.
“It’s really simple. All you have to do is concentrate your chaos magic onto a door or archway while visualizing where you want to go in your mind. For a door, just open it and presto, the door now leads there, regardless of how far away the destination is. For archways, it’s a little trickier because you won’t be able to see the destination, you’ll just have to walk through them to be instantly transported to it” Mael explained “This is a somewhat passive ability, so you can even set a door to a location and it’ll stay that way without you concentrating on it. All in all it’s very similar to a teleportation spell, except that instead of using your body as the starting point your making the door one and unlike a teleportation spell, there’s no real limit to how far you can go, or even how many doorways you can open at the same time. It’s perfect for people who can’t teleport for themselves or moving large groups of people around, say troops or something”
Hymphonic was so excited. This is exactly what she wanted, magic and spells beyond anything a normal pony could do. She walked up to the door and willed a bit of the chaotic power in her to her hand as she reached out and took the knob. She tried to picture a location but with so many interesting places to choose from it was slightly difficult to clear her mind and focus on one. She managed to focus on a thought of her and Disarray going someplace romantic and opened the door. Salty air hit her face as the sound of gentle waves tickled her ears.
“A Tropical island, very good Hymphonic! Who wants to go next?” Mael praised.
“Ah’ll give it a go!” said Bad Seed as Hymn shut the door and backed up. Seed walked up to the door and did the same, feeling the chaos magic flow to her hand as she tried picturing a location. She opened the door but was just greeted with the normal view of Sweet Apple Acres.
“Aw what gives? Ah did it right I thought…” sighed Seed
“Now don’t go beating yourself up. It’s takes a few tries sometimes before you get the hang of it” said Mael, giving Seed an encouraging pat on the back “go on, try again”
Seed nodded, and gave it another go. Nothing.
“Ah don’t get it…Ah’m just trying to open a door to the Everfree, it’s not even that far away!” she said, closing the door hard in frustration.
“Oh, I see the issue” said Mael, nodding slowly “It takes a skilled magic user to open doors where there are no doors. Hymphonic has an advantage over you because she’s both a unicorn and has had the practice focusing magic. Try, instead, to focus on another door someplace else and opening that. It’ll be much easier”
Seed nodded and tried again. When she opened the door she was greeted by the sight of her bedroom. Giggling, she closed the door and opened it again, revealing Applejack’s bedroom. Oh, this was fun. Closing the door a third time, she opened it to reveal the inside of the Apple family barn.
Applejack could be seen on the far side, moving barrel of apples over for storage until they were to go to market. Just out of happenstance, she turned around and saw Bad Seed peeking her head through the barn door.
“You!” the farmmare scream, charging at the doorway.
Bad Seed eeped and pulled her head back, quickly shutting the door behind her. Applejack got to the door and flung it up, running outside and looking around frantically for her rival. “Ah know yer out here! Come on out and face me ya no good Bad Seed!”
Back at the clubhouse, Seed gave a sigh of relief “Ah thought she was out in the fields, that was way too close..”
“Still, you did very good Seed. You just need a little more practice” Mael commented.
Seed smiled at her boss’ encouragement as Shadow bounded up to the door.
“Me next!” the shadow pegasus said, flinging open the door and walking through before anyone could stop her. After about thirty seconds she returned munching on a hayburger, closing the door behind her.
Mael chuckled and gestured to the drake “Ok Disarray, you’re up”
Disarray nodded and walked over to the door. He had been excited to learn new magic but now that it was his turn, feelings of inadequacy began to once again creep up in his mind. What if he messed up? What if he wasn’t good enough? Seed couldn’t do it at first, and she’s a pony, ponies are naturally magically gifted, not dragons.
Taking a deep breath he opened the door, revealing his room. He had done it. He actually did it and it wasn’t even that hard.
“Good, again” Mael said
Disarray nodded and closed the door, opening it again to reveal the royal archives in Canterlot.
“Again.”
Once again the door was closed and opened to reveal the streets of Manehatten.
Shaking their head, Mael moved over and pushed the door closed. Disarray looked towards his boss, expecting a proud smile, but only saw a disappointed frown.
Placing a hand on the drake’s shoulder, Maelstrom sighed “I don’t want you to open a door someplace else. I want you to open a door where there is no door”
“I can’t” said Disarray, looking down “I’m not that talented”
“Stop holding yourself back by thinking so little of yourself. You’re capable of so much more than you could ever imagine. I know it. I can see it, and I’m going to make sure you see it too”
The chaos god pulled the young dragon into a hug, softly saying “You spent your whole life being treated as if you were weak and helpless, when you were one of the strongest of all. So long spent looking up to ponies that you don’t even know who or what you are. Disarray, you are a dagon. One of the oldest and most magically gifted creatures in the multiverse”
Maelstrom let go of Disarray and gently pushed him towards the door “Now, open that door”
Disrarry took a couple deep breaths and dug deep in himself. He could feel the chaos magic that coursed through him, but deeper than that he felt something else, something just as ancient. This power felt...familiar. It felt like a part of himself he never knew was there. He took hold of it and it seemed to spark to life, spreading through him, mixing with his chaos magic. Disarray felt more power than he ever dreamt possible. It filled every inch of him, like a raging fire. The dark drake grabbed the door handle and pulled it open. The other Masters gasped. Maelstrom beamed with pride.
Outside the doorway was water, sand, coral, and all manner of sea life. Disarray had opened a door to the bottom of the ocean. Not only had had he opened a door, but the water was being held back as well. Not a drop slipped through as it rippled against an invisible barrier.
“Perfect” said Mael “Absolutely perfect”
Disarray smiled, tears welling up in his eyes. He did it. HE did it. On his own, with his own power, he did this. The young dragon felt something he had never felt before; true accomplishment.
Hymnphonic gave him a hug, one which he returned after a couple seconds of shock
“I knew you could do it, but this is incredible!” she said, releasing him after realizing they had been hugging for an awkward amount of time.
Disarray chucked abit, thankful that his black scales hid his blush.
Maelstrom closed the door and smiled “well, now that you all know how to get there, ready to see your new office?” they said before opening the door again, a bright warm light filling the room. The four looked through the doorway and gasped before following Maelstrom through, the door closing shut behind them.
Outside, running down the path, was Applejack, frantically looking in every direction
“I know yer hiding somewhere round here Bad Seed! Come on out and face me like a mare ya coward!”
The group found themselves in what appeared to be an insanely large lobby. Tall pillars of multicolored stone laced with veins of various glowing crystal pulsed with energy and towered high, floating off of a ground they realized wasn’t even there. The floor shifted and shimmered like the Aurora Borealis. One second it looked like the most beautiful polished marble, the next it looked like the softest of clouds. From the unseen ceiling a waterfall of liquid light fell into a large fountain, small rivers fed by the fountain trailed off to places far and unknown. There were no walls only infinite space and galaxies. More galaxies than could ever be counted formed nebulous clouds that rippled, shifted, and swayed as if dancing to some ancient song.
The Masters felt as though every second went on for a millennia, and a millennia a second. Every step they took felt as though they had stepped from one end of a galaxy to another. They felt tired and out of breath, but more full of energy and life then they have ever been in their entire lives. Seeing the confused yet awed looks on their team’s faces, Maelstrom chuckled.
“Your bodies and minds are getting used to being outside of your known reality. Outside of time and space. Outside of everything your cells know. You are now on a plane of existence mortals can't tred. Your brain is trying to comprehend what is going on. Let it, even if it doesn’t make sense to you. Don’t fight it. Embrace your divinity” they said, floating away across the lobby.
The Masters ran to catch up to their boss, noticing they were standing in front of six huge archways. Creatures of all types, both terrible and beautiful, were busy at work; moving out of one archway, disappearing into another. Maelstrom gestured to them all “There are nine main departments here at The Company” they began to explain, moving over to the first archway. Inside it the Masters could see the vast expanse of infinite cosmos. They watched stars ignite, planets form and fill with life, and galaxies shaped.
“This is the Department of Life & Creation. Kind of self explanatory, but they are responsible for shaping all matter and energy in the realities. Kind of the factory floor if you will, they craft the universes of the multiverse. In a nutshell, they make all our toys” Maelstrom explained.
Bad Seed moved up to the archway, a soft smile on her face “So much life...Ah can feel it deep inside mah being. New worlds, new plants, all just waking up for the first time”
Mael smiled warmly “That’s your natural affinity to flora” they said to Seed, moving over to the second archway. Inside was empty, but not a cold emptiness. It was peaceful. Wisps kept flying past them into the archway.
“This is the Department of Death & Recycling. They do the hard work of breaking things down into raw matter and energy for the Department of Creation to reuse. They handle facilitating souls, either processing them for reincarnation, or if the soul desires, recycling the soul back into raw energy. They also keep records of every soul that has gone through processing”
The Masters took a step back at the mention of death, but looked once again through the void in the archway. Maelstrom continued talking “They keep to themselves most of the time due to their workload but most of the death gods are pretty friendly. However, don’t piss them off, they all tend to have a deep temper”
“Wicked…” Shadow Blitz said.
“What pisses them off?” asked Disarray.
“Raising people back from the dead after they’ve been processed is the quickest way to find a scythe blade shoved so far up your ass...ANYWAY, it takes roughly twelve to fifteen relative hours after a soul arrives that they begin processing. Processing can take anywhere between three months to a hundred years give or take. Anywhere in that time frame, you can take the soul and...do whatever with it. After that, however, it’s gone. Either in a new being, or broken down to energy. I mean, SURE you could put in a lot of effort and power to bring it back and do whatever with it. But all that paperwork? THAT’S what pisses off Death Gods”
Disarray and the rest of the team just nodded and moved over to the next archway. This one made them feel uncomfortable, twitchy, and itchy. The inside looked like an regular office building, cubicles and all. However, everything inside looked to...perfect. It was all too symmetrical. It was all to lined up to the nanometer. Everything was perfectly perpendicular to everything else. Everything was so...it was so…
“This is The Department of Harmony and Balance” Maelstrom said with a small sneer. “They’re in charge of keeping everyone else organized and in line. In other words, they make sure we’re all doing our jobs right. They keep Creation and Death creating and recycling at a constant rate, organize company events, and keep Chaos in check. They are also the keepers of The Archive; the largest database of knowledge in the multiverse. Any book, any parchment, any piece of music or media, if it exists anywhere in the multiverse, there is a copy of it in the Archive. They also keep copies of all records and paperwork from every department along with files and books full of divine cosmic knowledge. Now before you get any ideas, being in there physically hurts. Too much….organization. I’d also recommend you keep away from the Harmony gods, they are OCD to the max and annoying as all hell. Now let's move on, being so close makes my skin crawl”
The group quickly made their way over to the next Archway. They could see beings moving around inside, walking on the underside of stairways and upside down hallways. Things floated, or were reversed. Everything seemed to shift and change with every blink. To a common mortal, the sight before them would automatically drive them mad. To Team Chaos, the sight in front of them seemed to make them relax.
Giving a contented sigh, Maelstrom grinned “And this, my wonderful team, is The Department of Chaos! You already know what we do, so let’s get a move on to your new office!” they said, floating forward.
“Wait, what about those other two Archways?” asked Hymnphonic
“The Department of Light and the Department of Darkness. Both of them are lower, support based departments. Don’t really need to worry about them. Though, Darkness does help us out every now and again. As for what they do. I know Light assists Creation and Harmony, but I have no idea what Darkness does officially. They keep to themselves, and they are extremely secretive. Now, let’s go, don’t you want to see your new workspace?”
The Masters nodded enthusiastically as they followed their boss into The Department of Chaos.
The inside was even more insane than the glance from the archway. Hallways stretched and curved, twisted and changed. One side could be brick then turn into wood, the other marble then obsidian. You could be walking on shag carpeting only to look down and see you’re on grass. Oddly enough, instead of it all feeling off putting or weird, the Masters found it rather comfy, homey even.
Maelstrom stopped moving and turned to face their team, a serious look on their face
“Ok, listen carefully. There’s an important trick to navigating this place, and only us Chaos gods can do it. If you haven’t noticed yet, things here have a habit of changing randomly. If you don’t know what you’re doing you can and will get lost in here for several eternities, I’ve seen it happen”
The others nodded wide eyed, giving their full attention. Mael nodded back before continuing “The trick is to have a destination in mind. Know where you want to go and just go there. Don’t think about directions, don’t think about logic. Just know where you want to end up. Your chaos magic will sync with the natural chaos magic of this place and you’ll always end up where you want to go guaranteed. You can also use this trick to will this place to change and reform itself different ways. Think of it like the Crazy Doors but on steroids. Without knowing this, you’ll end up wondering around forever with no destination. You could even end up in a hallway with no doors”
Mael started moving forward, the Master keeping pace behind them.
“Just keep thinking about following me, you’ll always end up where I am, or where I’ll be” they said with a chuckle as they floated over to a nearby door and opened it. The team hurried inside, excited to see their new office but instead was just greeted by a subpar employee lounge.
A long snake being was taking a nap on an old couch and a two headed goat was sitting at a table talking to a small hummingbird. A large fluffy spider relaxed in a hammock hanging from the ceiling.
Mael hovered over to a cheap looking coffee pot, the liquid inside was so black it seemed to be absorbing the light around it. With a smile they poured some into a paper cup, taking a long sip. “Ahhh Black Hole Brew, nothing like it. Any of you guys want a cup?”
“Ah’m not really a coffee drinker, how strong is it?” asked Bad Seed
“Let me put it this way. If a mortal were to drink a sip of this, they would never be able to sleep again” Mael answered, taking another sip.
“Ah’m good…”
“Suit yourself, Department of Darkness makes the stuff, so we have a literal unlimited supply. Anyway, let’s get to the office” said Mael with a smile, moving over to the door and opening it. Instead of it opening back out into the hallway it opened to a new room.
Its was like a huge luxury lounge. Large couches, several huge tvs, a jukebox, and many other amenities filled the room. To the right the words Arcade flashed in lights above an archway. To the left was a hallway leading to more rooms. The Masters couldn’t wipe the grins off their face.
“So, This is the main lounge of your new office. I'm of course using the term 'office' loosely, this is Headquarters for Team Chaos. You have several large TVs, I’ll let you figure out what they are and what they do. There are couches, mini fridges, a jukebox hooked to a surround sound system. Over on the far wall is a fully stocked bar. If you head down the hall you'll see that I added a large gym complete with training rooms, a library, a bathhouse complete with hot spring, personalized bedrooms for each of you, storage rooms for whatever, and a huge kitchen. Through that archway over there of course is the arcade which I stocked with thousands of games from hundreds of different consoles, some conference rooms, individual office rooms for each of you, and much more that you’ll have to find yourself” Mael said with pride “well? Don’t just stand around, go enjoy your new Headquarters!”
The Masters didn’t have to be told twice. Disarray made a beeline for the Arcade while Shadow Blitz flew to the kitchen. Hymphonic curiously went to go check out her bedroom while Seed plopped down on a couch to try and figure out what a TV was.
It took a few tries, but Bad Seed had managed to figure out EXACTLY what a TV was and why it was an wonderful devise. Shadow had joined her with some snacks and the two were watching a sporting event showing these colorful bipedal squid creatures competing to paint the arena or something. It was both confusing and entertaining.
In one of the training rooms Maelstrom stood before Disarray and Hymnphonic, both wearing a simple grey shirt and gym shorts.
“Ok, now, you both are very powerful by yourselves. But TOGETHER! Together you’ll be able to do things on my level” Mael said. ‘
The two teammates looking at each other then to their boss. Disarray had a look of determination on his face. If there was something the boss thought only he could do, he was going to do his best to do it. Hymnphonic also looked determined, but had a slight blush on her dark grey cheeks. There was something only her and Disarray could pull off, together.
Turning first to Disarray, Maelstrom continued their explanation.
“Disarray, you have the most raw power of any of your teammates. Not quite on my level, but stil nothing to shrug off. Remember, along with chaos magic, I boosted your normal magical levels to that of an elder dragon. However, you lack the ability to focus that power to perform complex spells. That’ll come with time and lots of practice but until then…”
Turning to Hymnphonic, they continued
“Hymn, you have all the talent and precision of a mage many times your age. You’ve taken to magic like a fish to water. I would argue that your understanding of the complexities of cosmic level magic put Twilight Sparkle to shame. However, while you have the control and knowledge, you don’t have the raw power needed to pull off extremely complex spells. You both see where I’m going with this?”
Looking at the both of them, they took Disarray's and Hymn's hands and places them together “together, one providing power, the other control, you’ll be able to pull off things normally only I could do in your world. No need to wait for me to pull of huge pranks, you all can do it on your own while I’m offworld” they said.
The gears were whirling in Disarray’s head. He had already thought up a new prank and knowing that he could pull it off whenever he wanted? He couldn’t help but grin. Maelstrom smiled at that grin.
“Use the crazy doors to get back to Equestria when you both are ready, I feel like you two are going to get up to some mischief” they said before leaving, heading back to the main lounge area.
Seeing the two mares relaxing on a couch, Mael plopped down next to them, watching TV as well.
“So, Disarray and Hymn might go pull off a prank on their own”
Bad Seed giggled "It’s ‘bout time Hymn got some alone time with Disarray. Also, Boss? Ah was thinking about who could join us. Ya know, to complete the team? Well, I think ah know somepony who’d be a perfect fit. Could ah go talk to them about it?”
Mael nodded “By all means, just don’t get in Disarray and Hymn’s way”
Seed grinned and got up, heading for the door “Ah won’t” she said, turning back to her old yellow and red self before opening the door to her bedroom in Equestria and stepping through.
Turning towards Blitz, Mael raised a brow “not going to go with them?”
“Naw.”
“Enjoying that TV huh?”
“Yup.”
“You know the gym has an aerial obstacle course and training area”
“That's nice...wait what?! Well why didn’t you say so?!” the shadow pegasus said before zipping off, leaving a grey gradient trail behind her.
Maelstrom only chuckled and changed the channel.
Chapter 4 - Noctis Insanus Ianuam
Luna had just finished a very relaxing bath; scented candles, body oils, bath salts, the works. It was times like these that she really enjoyed being a princess. She finished drying off and wrapped herself in her favorite midnight blue bathrobe. Opening the royal bath house door she raised an eyebrow as she was greeted not by a castle hallway but by foliage and the sight...and smell, unfortunately...of the Haysead Swamp. She calmly closed the door and walked over to a window. Yes, canterlot was still there.
Moving back over to the door she opened it again to reveal a desert. She closed the door. Opening it again revealed what appeared to be the main stage of a strip club. There was a whistle and a couple of cheers and Luna quickly slammed the door closed, a small blush on her face. She couldn’t help but be somewhat amused, if not a tab bit embarrassed, at this obvious ploy by Team Chaos.
After taking a breath and mentally bracing herself for whatever lay behind she opened the door again; Twilight Sparkle tumbling out of what appeared to be a broom closet. The purple alicorn brushed herself off and looked around confused until her eyes landed on the princess of the night.
“Luna? Where am I?” she asked.
“In the royal bath Twilight. While I can assume the origin of these ‘silly doors’ that doesn’t explain your being in a closet. Unless there’s something you wish to say…” said Luna slyly with a smirk.
Twilight’s eyes widened as a blush spread across her face “Wha-NO! No no no! Disarray tricked me into going into the closet! He showed me one full of old scrolls where one of the small storage rooms were, and when I went in he slammed the door behind me. When I opened the door again, it just led to another closet” said Twilight “I had thought that if I went into that closed, and reopened the door, it’d lead someplace else. So I went from closet to closet until I realized that the doors went to different locations regardless of where you were just by opening and closing them again. As for why I was still in the closet. It was because it was all closets! Every time I opened and closed the door it was just another closet!”
Luna nodded “That is actually a rather clever means of keeping you distracted as they cause pandamonium”
Twilight gave a sigh before moving over to the door and began to quickly open and close it repeatedly, peeking inside to see where it led.
Luna just raised a brow “Well, I suppose that’s one way of going about it…”
Twilight stopped and turned to her fellow princess “What do you mean?”
“Well, where are you trying to go?”
“I was hoping this door would eventually open to one of my friends’ houses”
Luna raised a brow “Why don’t you just teleport there? For that matter, why didn’t you just teleport out of the closet?”
Twilight just blinked a few times before facepalming. She had done it again, overthinking things. With a sigh and a groan she responded “I...forgot I could...I was slightly panicking and...and…” and that’s when it hit her, that was when it finally clicked.
“I was panicking so much I began overthinking and forgot something simple, like that I could teleport. That's how they got me the last few times! Disarray keeps putting me in scenarios that would cause me to panic and overthink!” she said in realization. Disarray was her baby brother after all. He had known her his whole life. Of course he’d know all the little ways to trip her up! He knows how she gets when she’s thrown into a problem without warning, he knows how she’ll overthink things and miss something really simple and obvious, he knows her!
Well, not this time! With a smirk of determination, Twilight disappeared in a flash of pink. The princess of the night simply shrugged and removed her robe. She would just soak in the royal bath until this prank was over.
Twilight first teleported to Sweet Apple Acres. She planned on collecting all her friends and teleporting each to the castle of friendship. It would be mildly exhausting, teleporting back and forth so many times, but it was the obvious right answer to get this prank over quickly. It seemed foolproof. She realized a glaring problem with this plan however when she got to Sweet Apple Acres; nopony was there. Drat, the Apple family must have gone through some doors.
She quickly teleported over to Sugar Cube Corner finding it just as empty and deserted. Next was Fluttershy’s cottage. Nothing. Rainbow Dash’s cloud house? Empty.
Desperate, she teleported over to Carousel Boutique.
“Twilight darling!” greeted Rarity “You’ve come just in time to try some dresses I’ve been working on”
Giving a sigh of relief that at least ONE of her friends could still be accounted for, she shook her head “Perhaps some other time Rarity. Right now, we have a problem”
“Let me guess, Team Chaos again?” said Rarity, her cheerful expression changing to a tired one.
Twilight just nodded and Rarity gave a sigh.
“These past few weeks have been the worst. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to the fact that my sweet little Spikey-Wikey and that nasty Disarray are the same person. Then there is that team of his, and that...that...thing that calls itself the god of chaos, poisoning their minds! Their pranks have been causing massive delays in my work!”
Sighing as well, Twilight nodded “I know! My plans to re-open the library had to be delayed for two whole weeks because of all their pranks. Anyway, we need to find the others and finish this”
“I couldn’t agree more! Wait, what did you mean by ‘finding’ the others?” the fashionista asked, throwing open her front door with magic and marching through before Twilight could warn her. Twilight quickly followed so they didn’t end up seperated.
They found themselves in a beautifully decorated great hall. The place seemed very familiar, but neither of them could place it. Twilight turned to Rarity.
“I was going to warn you about the prank; none of the doors go where they’re supposed to. We could end up anyplace in Equestria! Also, I can’t find the others. I think they may have already gone through a door and ended up someplace random”
Rarity gave an annoyed groan and was about to say something when a voice called out, distracting the two from the gust of wind pushing the door closed behind them.
“Twily! What a surprise, you came to visit! Though, it’s unlike you to not write a letter first. If we’d known we would have met you at the train station.”
Both mares turned around to see Shining Armor smiling at them, Cadence coming up behind.
“Twilight?” she asked gleefully “And I see you’ve brought Miss Rarity Belle! Why Shiny and I were just talking about how we wished you would open a boutique here in the Crystal Empire, weren’t we Shiny?”
Shining Armor just grinning and nodded “Oh we’d just love for you to create a crystal line of clothing”
Rarity’s eyes lit up and she was about to respond before she felt Twilight place a hand on her shoulder, shaking her head slowly.
“Sorry for disappointing you both, but we came here by accident.” she said, frowning a bit as she continued to speak “The doors have all been enchanted, so none of them lead where they’re supposed to go. We thought it was just affecting Equestria propper, but if we’re here it means it’s possible that they’re affecting all of Equis!”
Rarity’s gasped a little “They’ve never done a prank this big before, I didn’t think they were powerful enough to affect the whole world…”
Twilight nodded “This new god of chaos may be a bigger threat than we originally thought. Not just clever, but powerful”
Shining raised a brow “They? New god of chaos?? What happened to Discord?!”
“Retired” explained Rarity “He retired and named this strange ‘thing’ as the new god of chaos. Said thing then went and corrupted the minds of three mares and my dear Spikey-Wikey, and now they work for it, making our lives miserable!”
“Wait, Spikey-Wikey?” asked Shining slowly, turning to Twilight “you mean our little baby brother Spike works for…”
“That’s right big bro!” said the dark dragon in question. A ball of purple flames dispersing as he teleported in, floating several meters above them. His cape waved in an unfelt cosmic wind, his eyes glared at the ponies in front of him, and an evil smirk adorned his face. Next to him, Hymn floated lazily, sipping on a martini. “Twi, you figured out the trick in less than an hour this time! I’m so proud of you!”
Twilight just glared at him.
“Disarray, this isn’t funny! This is so much more dangerous and problematic than your last pranks! Also, why are you here, to laugh in our faces?!”
Disarray shook his head and smirked “Now, I’m not that bad Twi. In fact, I figured you were still confused and had come to explain the joke to you. Granted, explaining a joke makes it less funny but seeing you scramble is a joke in and of itself. How many closets did you go through?”
Twilight clenched her fists but Disarray cut her off before she could say anything back.
“Anyway, to explain things to those who haven’t yet figured it out, as you all are probably already aware; the doors don’t lead where they’re supposed to go. However your harmony powers will fix them. Just fire out a harmony wave and it’ll fix everything instantly”
“We know that already, that’s how the harmony powers work! Tell your boss these pranks are getting old fast!” said Twilight angrily. Disarray just shook his head and continued with a dark grin.
“Maelstrom didn’t plan this. I did. They aren’t even involved at all this time, this one is all me Twi! Well, all us” the dragon said, gesturing to Hymn who nodded with a smirk of her own, wrapping her arms around Disarray’s neck.
“Now, I’ll continue explaining before I was rudely interrupted. Harmony will fix the doors yes, HOWEVER, it’ll work ONLY on the doors. If someone ended up halfway across the world, they’ll stay there. Fix the doors, but you’d better make sure everyone is right where they belong first”
Cadence, who had been standing next to her husband listening quietly, raised a brow. This whole thing was extremely clever and she didn’t know this side of Spike, or rather Disarray now, existed. The drake definitely had poetional and this new god of chaos made the right choice in choosing him. She glanced over at her sister-in-law. Twilight was doing her best to calm herself, breathing deeply.
Rarity shook her head disappointingly, looking up at the dragon.
“Spikey-Wikey, I always thought you were a sweet little dragon! You were always so willing to help out, always so kind and generous. Need I say it? You had a special place in my heart. But now I see, you’re just a foal who can’t stop pestering and annoying the adults around you to get some attention. You don’t understand how much I absolutely despise such behaviour! I am seriously disappointed in you Spike, and if this all keeps up, I don’t think we could be friends anymore”
It was like someone had dumped an ocean of ice water over him. He didn’t know how to react to what he was feeling. On the one hand, it was infuriating that somepony kept calling him a foal when he was eighteen years old. On the other hand, it was like someone had taken a knife and jammed it into a closing wound, opening it wider. Fortunately, Hymnphonic was there and came to his rescue hugging him from behind, her eyes burning with rage. Hymn loved her sister, but this was going to far!
“Don’t listen to her Disarray! She’s just taking advantage of the feelings you had for her. She’s manipulating you into doing what she wants; just like she always does!” she said before teleporting right front of Rarity, glaring at her.
“He’s a lesser god of chaos now. It’s both his job and role in this universe to bring calamity, disorder, and disasters. That had a lot more weight to it than making dresses, don't you think? After all, Chaos is a necessary fundamental building block of reality itself. That’s a lot more important than what blouses are in style. So, tell me, who has the more relevant role here?”
Rarity was beside herself. How DARE this mare speak to her like that! The absolute nerve!
“You little...how dare you?! Listen I don’t know who you are, but when I find out I’ll-” Rarity started to say but was cut off by Hymn.
“How dare I? How dare YOU?! How dare you speak to someone you claim to care about in such an underhanded and manipulative way?!” Hymn said, turning and giving Disarray a comforting smile. She had his back, she’d always have his back.
Floating up back to his side she sneered at the ponies below, oh she was going to enjoy this.
“We were going to go easy on you, but now? Now, we’re going to make you work!” she said as she began to sing.
Rarity and Twilight groaned.
“What’s wrong? Her voice is quite beautiful” asked Cadence.
Soon she understood their frustration when the servants and guards around them, possessed by the power of Hymnphonic’s voice, marched to the nearest door. Without hesitation, even as the princess of love ordered them to stop, they opened their doors, went through, and slammed said doors behind themselves. Cadence couldn’t help but raise a brow again, turning and looking up at the emerald shadow mare.
Giving a wink to her rival, Hymn turned to Disarray, wrapping her arms around him “Come on Disarray! Tonight’s our night, me and you. Let’s have some fun making more people get lost through the doors”
The dark drake smiled and they both teleported away. They had a whole world to spread chaos too and they weren’t going to do it sitting around there.
“...this is an interesting development. So he goes by Disarray now?” asked Shining.
Twilight nodded “Sorry I hadn’t sent you a letter about it, there was just so much to deal with and I’m still trying to get used to it myself. This whole thing is just one giant headache!
Disarray and Hymn used their magic to find the most crowded areas in Equestria and the Crystal Empire. For added fun they even went to a couple cities in the Griffin Empire, just to shake things up. Currently, they were seated on a park bench in Baltimare, watching ponies enter and exit out of buildings confused. Some had wised up and decided to stay put either by sitting on the ground or slowly wandering around their new location. Some were climbing in and out of windows. The duo sat in silence until Hymn eventually spoke up.
“Hey, Disarray? You know, you shouldn’t let her treat you like that” she said “I know you’re supposed to be over her, but she still gets to you. She’s never going to see you as you wanted, just use you to get what she wants”
Disarray just nodded with a sigh.
Hymn pulled him in for a sideways hug “I’m only saying this because I’m your friend. Don’t worry about her, just focus on being the best Master of Mayhem you can be. The boss made you the leader of the team because they see so much in you, just like I see so much in you”
Disarray could only nod again, a slight smile on his face
“Thanks Hymn, I needed to hear that” he said
The shadow unicorn smiled back “Always glad to help. Now, ready to spread some more chaos?”
With a thumbs up from the dragon, Hymnphonic began to sing; her voice amplified by Disarray’s power. Everypony in the entire city was at her mercy. Each one opened a door, walked through, and slammed it shut behind them, getting lost all over Equis.
A young mare had found herself at the mercy of that voice three times already. She had ended up all over Equestria, and once even ended up in one of the cities in the dragon kingdom. That had been scary. Now, fortunately she was back on Equestria soil, just in time for the voice to hit her again and force her through another doorway. To where? She didn’t know.
To her surprise, she found herself in a familiar mall in Manehatten. Could it be? Fortune must be smiling down upon her because she had been teleported back to her hometown! She had never been so happy to see this mall!
“You! Ah’ve been looking all over for ya!” a voice called out behind her. She turned and nearly pissed herself. Walking towards her with a huge grin on their face was one of the Masters of Mayhem she’d heard about. The shadow mare continued to get closer and closer, her red eyes seem to borrow into her soul.
“Please don’t hurt me!” the mare screamed in fear, falling to the ground and holding her hands up in defence.
Seed just blinked in confusion until she realized that was wrong. Quickly she shifted back to her ‘normal’ form of Applebloom “Aw Babs, come on, there’s nothing to worry about. It’s just me”
“Ap-Applebloom? What’s going on? I keep ending up in all sorts of random places! Also, why do you look like...are you one of those chaos masters I heard about?!”
“Ah’m gonna tell ya everything, but we better go somewhere where we can talk” Seed said, switching back to her chaos form and going over to a door to a nearby shop and opening it, gesturing to Babs to walk through.
The city mare cautiously walked through the door, a look of surprise on her face as she found that she wasn’t inside the snack shop but rather a nicely furnished wooden room, complete with conference table. Babs quickly ran to the window and saw the apple trees of her cousins' orchard.
“Woah, that’s so cool! You can control the doors!?
“Oh Ah can do much more than that, Ah have all sorts of tricks and skills. Being a lesser god of chaos means all kinds of crazy power, and all Ah gotta do is annoy the crap outta ma’ big sis! Isn’t that awesome?!”
Babs nodded wide eyed before going to the window and looking out, giving a slightly worried look “But aren’t you afraid she’s gonna catch you? If she were to see you…”
Seed just grinned and shook her head “Naw, Ah saw her and Pinkie Pie entering the barn. So I decided to run up and slam the door closed behind them before they could realize what was happening. They’re somewhere far away from here haha”
“But isn’t that...you know...a little mean?”
“Cuz, Ah’m one of the ‘bad guys’ now. It’s my job to try and stop the Elements of Harmony, even if Ah have to be a little mean. Or a lot mean, Ah’m tellin ya, mah sis can be a pain in the ass sometimes”
Babs just nodded, still taking this whole situation in.
Meanwhile, Disarray and Hymn continued traveling from city to city, using Hymnphonic’s hypnotic voice to force all different types of people to enter doors all over the place. Confusion was the name of the game here. However, Hymn was a little distracted, still thinking about what her sister had tried to do. Just like since he was little, she tried to manipulate Disarray buy using his feelings for her to her advantage. She did this constantly to stallions, dragging them along by their heartstrings, but to do this to Disarray? How dare she!
They duo kept moving along, forcing more and more ponies and creatures of all kinds to walk through doors to random places. This was truly a jumbled mess. One that wasn’t going to be fixed soon. After all, Team Harmony didn’t know where their teammates were. Only Twilight and Rarity were accounted for at the Crystal Empire. The two in question were busy opening and closing doors, desperate to find their friends. Shining and Cadence had brought out a small table, and we casually sipping tea.
With a frustrated sigh, Twilight turning and faced her older brother and sister-in-law “Why don’t you help us instead of sitting on your flanks?!” she complained.
Shining and Cadence just smirked and shrugged.
“Come on Twily, don’t you see this isn’t bringing you closer to any real solution to this mess?” asked Shining “Come on, think. You’re the Element of Magic, surely you know a spell to correct these doors”
Twilight gave an exasperated huff, rolling her eyes.
“Sure I know how to return the doors to normal. It’s a very simple spell. However, the spell can only fix one door at a time. I can’t just go around fixing every single door individually, it’d take forever! That also doesn’t solve the problem of getting everypony back to their respective homes. Then there’s the issue of Disarray and Hymnphonic constantly sending ponies to random places, reshuffling everypony around! This entire situation gets constantly harder and harder with each passing minute!!”
Shining nodded and Cadence decided take over the explanation “We realize that Twilight, but that’s the idea. This prank is meant to constantly get more and more complex the longer it takes for you to figure out. The answer here is to play the game in reverse. You can make the doors all lead to one place right?”
Twilight nodded slightly, looking at the two. Knowing them, they probably already had the answer to this riddle. Twilight sighed, it was a good thing she ended up here to get their help, or else she’d be at this all night.
“Yes, I can. Why?” she asked, eager to hear their plan and get this all over with.
“Well, why don’t we just enchant the doors to reunite all the ponies in one spot and THEN send then back to their respective homes. Once they’re all gathered in one spot, you and the other elements just repair all the doors at once preventing more chaos” Shining stated.
“We can use the three palaces as points to reunite everypony” said Cadence with a smile “Celestia, Luna, and I can organize everypony, while Shining and the mage-guard keeps Disarray and Hymnphonic distracted and away just in case they want to try hypnotizing ponies again while you gather your friends and prevail through the power of Harmony”
Twilight nodded, giving a big smile “Yes! This will definitely work! Thank you both so much, I don’t know what I’d have done without you two!” she exclaimed, giving both a big hug.
Shining just smiled “Aw Twily, you would have figured it out on your own eventually, you always do.
The purple alicorn smiled and blushed a bit at the praise before focusing her magic on the nearest door, commanding it to only go to one place; her palace and vice-versa. Cadence did the same to another nearby door, but to Canterlot.
“Cadence!” greeted Luna, walking through the door wearing only a shirt and sweatpants.
Cadence hugged her aunt before pulling away to take in her outfit “Having a casual Night Court I see” she teased with a giggle.
“Night Court was canceled do to this prank. I’ll have to remember to thank our new god of chaos and his associates, those nobles can be rather...irksome. It also doesn't help that I seem to have misplaced my dear sister. Regardless, I assume you have some sort of solution for this debacle?”
“As a matter of fact we do have a plan of sorts. It’ll take a lot of time and effort, and the faster we work the faster we finish. Also, the faster we work the less time we give the enemy to make things more complicated again. But in all seriousness, we’d better hurry. Our ponies are getting transported to all manner of crazy random locations" Cadence replied.
Twilight went wide eyed when she realized what Luna has said.
"Wait! Celestia is missing?!"
Luna just smiled and shrugged "She'll turn up, I have a sneaky suspicion where she is..."
Twilight was about to ask but Luna walked back to the door to Canterlot, calling forth a platoon of her royal guard and ordering them to follow Cadences directions to the letter. They saluted and turned to the princess of love, awaiting her command.
Once orders were given and everypony was up to speed they began to execute their plan. All across Equis, ponies were waking up from the influence of Hymnphonic’s song. Looking around, they found themselves in all manner of crazy random locations; from Reptilia in the Dragon Kingdom, to Ponyagara Falls, to parts of the Griffin Empire, to even Zebrica.
For the most part, it seemed the doors were purposefully short range. Just enough ponies ended up in far off places to cause panic and a sense of urgency, but the majority of ponies just ended up at a neighbor’s house, or at its worst, the next town over. The irony and brilliance of this is that the majority of ponies would have had no problem getting back home on their own should the doors be fixed, but Twilight and the other princesses still had to gather everypony together just to make sure the ones who ended up far away could be brought home safe. It was a ton of extra work that purposely overcomplicated things.
It also appeared that the Masters of Mischief played a personal hand in manipulating the locations of a few doors for various individuals, if Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon were any example. The two had found themselves face first in the Manehatten city dump, plopped into the smelliest wettest pile of rotting garbage in the place. They could have sworn they heard laughing.
Back at the three places, Twilight, Luna, and Cadence were working diligently to organize the ponies that flooded their great halls. Among said ponies could be seen the odd zebra or two and a few confused griffins. Palace guards kindly guided ponies into various groups, and most politely waited until they could go home. Once a large enough group for a certain city were gathered, they were sent home through a doorway to their city’s town center where they were instructed to wait until the doors were fixed before trying to re-enter their homes.
“I’m seeing less and less people out on the streets” said Hymnphonic with a slight frown “It seemed they figured out how to fix this one”
Disarray looked up at the sky. The sun was setting, the moon was raising, and the stars were starting to appear. The day was over and he smiled.
“It’s fine Hymn, It’s already night. We won haha. What do you think of that?”
Hymn giggled and hugged the drake “I think this was really fun. You always come up with the best ideas. If we’re done out here, let’s go home. All that singing has made me tired”
Disarray nodded happily and the two teleported away. It was kind of nice, he thought, having fun, just the two of the. It was quieter, but also nice.
Back at Twilight’s palace Fluttershy had finally arrived after three hours of receiving ponies.
“Fluttershy! It’s good to finally see you!” smiled Twilight “Where have you been?”
“Oh Twilight, you have no idea how wonderful it was! I ended up in Zebrica, where I saw lots and lots of wild animals! I even saw an elephant and met this old giraffe who had these beautiful neck rings. She told me she had always wanted to meet a pony an-”
“It’s great you had such a fascinating day darling” Rarity interrupted “but we MUST hurry and find the others so we can get together and stop this madness!”
“Aaand we have to make sure everypony gets home safely…” groaned Twilight “This prank is the most exhausting yet! I’m going to need another aspirin...”
Looking up, the purple princess spotted Rainbow Dash hovering in the air. The pegasus was looking about, searching for her friends. She spotted them as Twilight waved her over.
“Hey Twilight! For some reason I ended up at your brother’s place. He told me head here. How’re these crazy doors treating you?”
“I’m done talking about these stupid doors for right now. Where were you, by the way?” asked Twilight with a sigh.
Dash just shrugged “Found myself in Los Pegasus when I went out for groceries. I gambled a bit; won some money, lost some money, it was an ok day”
“Ah…” was all Twilight mumbled, watching as a garbage covered Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon walked past her
“...no comment…” they both muttered, walking over to a group of ponyville ponies who in turn gave them a wide berth. They were absolutely furious and were going to make whomever was responsible pay if it was the last thing they do!
“Well Howdy ya’ll! Ain’t ya a sight for for sore eyes” greeted Applejack with a wave. Pinkie Pie was bounding around happily beside her “We took our time, but we’re finally here”
“Oh my gosh oh my gosh oh my gosh today was super-duper awesome fun!!!” Pinkie Pie practically screamed “First, I went over to Applejack’s for some Zap Apple jam for a project I was working on, youknowhowIamworkingonthisandthatsoIdecidedtoworkonthiszapapplecakebutIneededthejam ANYWAY when we tried to enter the barn, BOOM we were at Ponyagara Falls! We tried to go back but the door slammed shut behind us. It was super fun though! I went over the falls in a barrel eventhoughApplejacktoldmenottobutitwasfunintheendandthenwewentthroughanotherdoorandendedupinthemoutainsandwentsnowboarding! Applejack is really good at snowboarding! So anywho wegothroughanotherdoorandwe’reatthesea! Like, the really big one! Then weheardsingingandendedupinManehattenwherewemetApplejack’sauntandunclewhowerereallyniceandeverything. After all that we went through another door and ended up in Canterlot. Princess Luna sent us here and presto here we are, where I then told you all about the awesome day we had!”
The others stared at Pinkie Pie while Applejack just shook her head with a smile “She’s gonna sleep real well tonight…Anywho, seein how we’re all here, lets go about fixing this mess”
Twilight blinked a few times before giving a relieved nod “I couldn’t agree more! The soldiers will continue escorting the groups where they need to go. It seems everyone has been organized so we can send out a harmony wave to fix all the doors at once and finally be done with all this!”
Twilight gestured to her friends, who nodded and formed a circle. Holding hands, they concentrated and released their rainbow wave of harmony. Every door returned to normal, and now Twilight had to deal with the task of getting all the remaining groups home.
Some knocking from a nearby closet caused the group to turn, just in time to see the door open and a confused Princess Celestia step ou. Behind her through the door they could see brooms and other cleaning supplies.
“Oh finally! I’ve been stuck in the closet all day!” she said before walking away.
"Huh...Celestia was in the closet..." said Rainbow Dash.
The purple princess' eye twitched and a small blush graced her cheeks before she just shook her head and have a huff. Walking over to the nearest group who waited patiently by a door she calmly asked “What are you all from?”
“Eh? We're from Vanhoover”
This was going to be a very long night.
It was almost four in the morning and they were still getting ponies back to where they belonged. The Elements were beyond exhausted, and Twilight suggested that after it was all over and fixed, her friends should sleep over in her castle. They all graciously accepted.
Disarray and Hymn has just arrived back to the the old CMC clubhouse now Team Chaos regional office from the main Headquarters. They had learned from Shadow Blitz that they could watch the goings on of the prank on the many TVs in their HQ lounge. It was quite hilarious watching Team Harmony scramble to figure things out and gave them joy to see everyone else generally having fun ending up in random locations.
“I had a really great time” laughed the dark drake.
Hymn smiled, her arm wrapped around his “I’m glad to see you smiling Disarray. I know what happened with Rarity really got to you”
“Yea, well, if you weren’t there she might have. Thank you for being at my side tonight Hymn, and for having my back. It means a lot of have a friend like you that I know I can always count on”
Hymn blushed, punching the dragon in the arm playfully “hey, what are friends for, right?”
It was about that time that Bad Seed and Babs entered, both looking rather tired from staying up so late.
“Oh there ya’ll are. Ah was looking for you Disarray. Well, you and the boss. Is the prank over?” Seed asked, plopping down into one of the seats at the conference table, leaning back and proping her hooves up.
“Yea, Team Harmony just finished wrapping things up, rainbow wave and all” replied Disarray, Hymnphonic nodded in agreement.
“Spike, Sweetie Belle, is that really you?” asked Babs wide eyed.
Both lesser gods nodded and shifted back to their old ‘normal’ forms.
“Babs? Haha I didn't notice you come in! What are you doing here? Did you enjoy our little game?” asked Hymphonic, a huge grin on her face.
“It was amazing! Applebloom, or um, Bad Seed was telling me all about you guys and your jobs! She even told me about the night you girls got your cutiemarks, I’m so jealous, I wish I could get mine”
Disarray raised a brow “You don’t have yours either? What are you good at?”
Babs shrugged, giving a sigh “I don’t know about being good at anything, but I like nightlife, and clubs, and parties. I want to open a big nightclub one day, but my parents think that idea is stupid and are constantly making me take more ‘conventional’ jobs. None of them have worked out and I’m still a blank flank…”
“Parties huh?...” mused Disarray, the dragon glancing over to Seed who had a huge grin on her face, nodding enthusiastically. Seems she had already came to the same conclusion he was coming to right now.
Turning to Babs, Disarray shifted back into his chaos form and smiled “Well, what if we were to help you get your cutiemark. You ARE the forth crusader after all”
The mare’s eyed widened “You can do that? How?”
“Easy. Join us. Join Team Chaos. I’m sure our boss Maelstrom would love to have you onboard”
Babs couldn’t believe what she was hearing. She looked to Bad Seed who just smiled and nodded her head. Then to Sweetie Belle who shifted back to her chaos form and did the same. They were serious. A part of her wanted to scream yes as loudly as she could, another became hesitant. After all, if something sounds too good to be true, it usually is. She couldn’t let herself get her hopes up…. That’s how they get shattered. Her parent's taught her that. Life isn't all fun and games they say. Big dreams are just that; dreams.
“But, you said you work for the new god of chaos right? So even if you want me on the team, they have the final say. Why would they want a twenty year old blank flank who can’t keep a job?”
“Maybe because said boss sees something in said blank flank. Or maybe because said boss is nuts. Maybe both. The question isn’t why. The question is do you want the job?” asked a voice behind her. Babs whipped around and came face to face with Maelstrom, their three golden eyes focusing on the city mare.
“Well?” they asked again, holding out a contract for Babs to sign.
Thinking it over Babs looked at the chaos god, then over to her friends. Wait a second, why was she debating this?! Her friends, who were GODS, just came to her and asked her to become a god as well; it was a no brainer!!
Snatching the contract from Mael she quickly went over to the table and signed her name, handing it back with a huge grin on her face.
“I’m in!”
Mael shook Babs hand as they imbued her with chaotic powers. It seemed more unstable than with the others. She seemed to constantly warp and change, her body becoming two dimensional, then quilted, then a quadrupled pony, then for a second even claymation before returning back to normal. Her fur and hair cycled through several colors and patterns before finally her body turned dark grey, her mane, tail, and eyes a bright yellow. Her outfit had changed from a shirt and jean short to a pair of black and yellow plad bellbottom pants and a black and plaid sleeveless top, complete with a wide loose fitting back belt covered in gold studs. Babs really really liked her new look.
Team Chaos had huge smiles on their faces. The girls ran over and hugged their new teammate. Disarray turned to his boss.
“Five down, only one to go. A pegasus for Fluttershy right?”
Mael nodded as the new shadow mare ran up and hugged her new boss “Oh thank you Maelstrom, this power feels awesome! I promise I won't let you down!”
The chaos god chuckled “I know you’ll try your best. With a new look and the start of a new life comes a new name. Hmm, wait, I know. Welcome to the team...Party Pop”
Chapter 5 - The Other Side
It had been a little over a week since, what had been dubbed, The Crazy Doors Incident. At Maelstrom’s suggestion the team had decided to lay low for a bit. This move served two purposes. It gave everyone on Equis a much needed break from the powers chaos while also making everyone paranoid, wondering when the next prank was going to hit them. It was quiet, too quiet.
Disarray was back at Castle Friendship, relaxing in the library while sipping some tea and reading a nice book. Twilight was reading with him, a little nervous due to how calm things seemed to be, but was trying to make the most of this peace and enjoy the time she got to spend with her baby brother.
The girls of chaos had decided that this break from their regular mischief was the perfect opportunity for some ‘mare-time’. The four of them had donned their original ‘ordinary’ forms and decided to spend the day out on the town. It sounded exciting at first, but Ponyville really didn’t have much in way of nightlife and entertainment. There were a couple bars, a few shops, a nice sized marketplace, but Ponyville was no Canterlot.
They walked around the streets, tried on outfits at Carousel Boutique until Rarity kicked them out, and after wandering around some more the four found themselves in a familiar booth at Sugarcube Corner, sipping on milkshakes and munching on cupcakes.
“Do you feel like...I don’t know...that we should be someplace else?” asked Scootaloo, taking a bite of the half eaten cupcake she had been staring at for the past few minutes.
“What do ya mean? Ya don’t like Sugarcube Corner anymore?” Appleboom responded, taking a nice gulp of her milkshake.
“No, I mean...we’re all of age here. So why are we hanging around a bakery? Shouldn’t we be hanging out at bars or something?”
“I’m so down for going to a bar!” Babs chimed in, stuffing the rest of her cupcake in her mouth and seemingly swallowing it whole. “Let’s go!”
“Ah never been to a bar before….could be interesting…” said Applebloom, looking over to Sweetie Belle “What do you think?”
“I think it could be fun. Check out a local bar or two and if we don’t like it we can head to the Spa. Ha, even if we do like it, we could head to the spa afterwards!”
With that settled, the four quickly finished their food and left. Seemingly unknown to them, two sets of eyes had been glaring from across the eatery. Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon watched the group leave before turning back to each other.
“What do you suppose they’re up to?” Silver asked.
“I don’t know, but it’s probably some lame new plan to get their cutiemarks. I’m not buying that they’ve given up their dumb crusading. Not for one second!” resplied Diamond.
Silver nodded “Now they have that fourth markless looser from the city too. She wouldn’t just come out here for no reason. They are definitely up to something!”
“Definitely, and we’re going to get to the bottom of it!” Diamond said.
The two got up and left, determined to figure out what was going on.
Meanwhile, in Canterlot:
“Experimental batch number three hundred and forty three” said Luna, reading off a clipboard
“Complete failure” responded Celestia.
Luna wrote that down and continued reading out loud “Experimental batch number three hundred and forty four?”
“Again, complete failure” sighed Celestia.
Writing that down again with a slight nod, Luna responded “So that brings us to the present. Experimental batch number three hundred and forty five, sample number one.” She readied her pen to take notes.
Celestia nodded a picked up a small brown round candy and after looking at it hopefully she popped it into her mouth, spitting it out a few seconds later “Again, failure” she said sadly.
“Noted” replied Luna, writing down the results.
Over the past week, at Celestia’s order, the old confectionary castle staff had been rehired and were working in tandem with the new confectionary staff to recreate Disarray’s cruelest and most sinister of creations; the Candy of All Candies. Needless to say, they were failing miserably. Logically, there was no way a bunch of mortal chefs could ever hope to recreate something made by a god, but Celestia was determined. She wouldn’t rest until she could undo this curse that has befallen her and once again partake in her beloved desserts. First, however, she had to recreate that evil candy in order to begin developing a cure.
“Experimental batch number three hundred and forty five, sample number two” said Luna.
Once more Celestia picked up a candy and popped it into her mouth before immediately spitting it out. Failure. Always Failure. Celestia clenched her teeth and scowled. She’ll make them pay. That twisted and cunning Disarray, that evil maniacal Maelstrom, and the rest of their little team. This was an insult! This was unacceptable! This was completely and totally impony-like torture! IT WASN’T FAIR! What did she ever do to them?!
Luna couldn’t help but chuckle a little at her sister’s misery. She wouldn’t say it out loud but seeing her sister like this was rather amusing for her. It didn’t matter what combination of ingredients or methods the Royal Confectioners tried; the results always ended in failure. Celestia was miserable, but at least she had lost some weight. That was something Luna’s ears had picked up through the grapevine of castle staff. Many were talking about her sister’s rather sizable hips, thighs, and rear having not only slimmed down but were starting to tone a bit as well. Her wide hourglass figure was the talk of many a stallion and the envy of many a mare, and this new ‘diet’ of hers was only helping. The benefits didn’t stop with the Royal Plot; due to Celestia’s rather hysterical antics and constant experiments, pastry chefs and candy makers all across Equestria were discovering and creating all new and more delicious treats every day.
It was a new golden age of sweets in the kingdom of Equestria. The only place that didn’t benefit was Ponyville, as the children there no longer bought candies. Places such as Sugarcube Corner and BonBon’s Bon-bons had to change and alter their menu; offering sandwiches, wraps, crepes, croissants, and even dried fruits and trail mix in order to keep their businesses afloat. According to reports, these changed seemed to greatly improve their overall profits. So yes, it was a golden age in Equestra. Luna couldn’t help but notice the irony, fate's cruel hand. It was a golden age of sweets and Celestia was the cause of it but couldn’t partake in any of it.
“I don’t know what to tell you, Tia” said Luna, watching as Celestia starting packing up the remaining candies in the batch. She seemed too disheartened to continue testing them. “Maybe it’s time to stop. I mean, you’ve lost weight, you have more energy now, so there is a blessing here among your ‘curse’. However, if you desire to reverse the effects so badly, why not just ask Disarray to give you more of his candies? You could finally then leave the poor Royal Confectioners alone, you’ve been running them ragged!”
Celestria frowned and shook her head.
“No. NO! I will not kneel before that little god of chaos and beg for treats! I will find that recipe myself! Even if it takes me a hundred, a thousand, TEN THOUSAND YEARS!! Do you understand me Luna?! Have I made myself clear?! I will do this on my own if I have to! Even if it takes an eternity or two! If you’re not going to help anymore, you can leave. I’ll finish up here on my own”
Luna just rolled her eyes and left, deciding it would be better to just go to her chambers and relax, than to have to deal with her sister while she was like this. The whole situation was still amusing to her though. She teleported directly to her bedroom and immediately stripped out of her royal garb, donning a blue silk nightgown. She had been up all night and, thanks to her sister, the better part of the day. She needed some sleep. Maybe she’ll have a bit of personal fun first, but ultimately sleep. She yawned and turned around, only to notice three golden eyes staring at her through the darkness.
“Hello Luna”
“AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”
“Luna, calm yourself!”
“What are you doing in my bedroom!? How long have you been there?!” with a gasp, Luna’s eyes widened “What did you see?!”
“See? Oh, I saw everything. You have a nice body, you know. So toned, and sculpted. You like to take good care of yourself and it shows. It’s amazing how different two sisters can be...like night and day” Maelstrom said with a chuckle.
Luna gave an angry glare, but her cheeks were heating up in a blush that threatened to overtake her whole face. She was no stranger to the act of courtship, but it had been a rather long time since anyone had so blatantly shown interest in her body. She had just recently started to regain any semblance of popularity among her subjects and most in the castle lusted after her overly voluptuous sister. After a few more seconds of glaring and thinking, she gave up. While annoyed, she couldn’t truly be mad at Maelstrom. Their pranks had been a source of great delight and entertainment for her since their arrival, and besides, it was against her nature; as a being of Darkness. Still, they invaded her personal area, her sacred secret space. That would not do!
“Guards! Guards!!” Luna cried out.
Both beings stayed silent, staring at each other as nothing happened.
“Guards?” Luna called out again. Again, there was no reply.
“Basic soundproofing spell, no one can hear anything that’s happening in this room. Though, I am curious, what exactly were your guards going to do that you yourself couldn’t?”
“Well….um….” now that she thought about it, what WAS the purpose of the royal guard? She tugged a bit at her nightgown as she thought, causing Maelstrom to chuckle.
“That nightgown really hugs your curves nicely, though if it’s really that chilly in here, you should put on a shirt or something” Mael continued with a smirk. Luna’s blush grew.
“Wh-what is it you want?” she managed to say, moving over to her wardrobe, fetching and putting on a bathrobe. Tightling it caused the fabric to rub against her nipples, which in turned caused her to gasp and bite her lip. Was it really so cold in here? It must be the cold.
“I was in the neighborhood, and decided to stop by for a chat. We really haven’t had the chance for a real conversation since my arrival and I AM rather curious about you. Younger sister to Princess Celestia. Avatar of Darkness. However, the only one who seems to be cloaked in shadows is you, and yet still, they aren’t even the shadows of your own creation. Why? Does your sister have you on such a short leash that you can’t help but be two steps behind her?”
“Leash?! I am on NO leash! I am a princess of Equestria! Goddess and Avatar of Darkness, Guardian of the Night, Slayer of Nightmares, Might of the Moon!” stomped Luna, standing tall and regal.
“And yet here you are, helping your gluttonous sister try sweets day in and day out, oh powerful goddess. Did she accept that sage advice you gave? No, spat it right back in your face. So mighty, so regal, oh slayer of nightmares, oh guardian of the night. If I didn’t know better, I’d say you were nothing more than a Light lackey” mocked Mael
“How did you…” Luna bagan to ask
“I told you, I saw everything. Also, for the record, if Celestia were to swallow her pride and ask, we would gladly give her more candy. But that is neither here nor there. No, I’m here to talk about you…You went super dark that one time, right? Got fed up with being stuck in your sister’s shadow, right? The whole Nightmare Moon incident? You were locked out for a thousand years, but nothing’s changed has it? You’re still in your sister’s shadow and let's face it, with an ass that wide she casts a really big shadow. A shadow keeping you from being yourself. Keeping you from rising up as the goddess you were meant to be. Keeping you from your purpose”
Luna eyed the god of chaos. They were calm, and didn’t seem to be up to anything. Parts of what Mael said hurt. It hurt because it was true. She couldn’t deny that part of her still longed to show up her shining sister. She couldn’t deny that part of her was just playing the part, trying to be on her best behaviour, trying to meet everypony’s standards just so that she wouldn’t be pushed away again.
However, as isolating and lonely as her sister’s shadow was, she still had a good thing going. She was a princess of Equestria, and one of a handful of the most powerful beings in the world. She was just now starting to get the favor of her ponies back. She wouldn’t give all that up to join some villain. On the other hand, the longer she thought about Mael’s words, the more curious she was becoming. It wouldn’t hurt to just hear them out. After all, their departments had always been rather friendly to each other. Maybe Maelstrom’s intentions were from a place of genuine kindness. Either way, even if she didn’t agree with any of it, it might provide some insight she could then pass on to her sister. Villians do love monologuing after all. “Ok, you’re here for me...what about me? What are you really after?”
Nodding, Mael smilled “Ok, right here, right now, I’m putting an offer out. I don’t want to chase you down and I know you see it”
“See what? What kind of offer?...” Luna asked.
“A deal; you run with me, and I can cut you free; right out of this drudgery and walls you keep in. Why not trade all this typical for something truly mystical?” Mael said with a smile.
“If you’re being serious right now, then you are crazy…” said Luna
“Well then come live a little crazy! You can play it sensible, like your sister; queen of conventional. Or you can risk it all and see…”
“I don’t know…” muttered Luna.
“Don’t you want to get away from the same old parts you gotta play? Well, I got what you need so why not join me and take the ride? I’ll take you to the other side!”
“But my sister…”
“You can do like she do, or you can do like me. Stay in your cage, or finally take the key. Just like that, suddenly you’re free to fly! Fly right on to the other side.”
Shaking her head, Luna sighed. It was slightly tempting, but she had her place here. “Ok, listen, you want to cut me in. Well, I hate to tell, but it just won’t happen! So thank you, but no. I think that you should go. I quite enjoy this life you say I’m trapped in” she said, leaning in an placing a hand on Mael’s shoulder “Now I admire you, and all the things you do. You’re really something, it’s all really something. But I live here among the top and I’m afraid that’ll never stop. There no way I’ll go with you...”
“I don’t believe that for a second. You have a purpose, same as me. Come on Luna…” Maelstrom began, but was cut off.
“Don’t you see that I’m ok with this high class role I get to play?! I have all that I need and I don't want to take the ride. I don’t want to see the other side! So you go ‘do like you do’, I’m fine to do like me. Not in a cage so I don't need to take a key. Please leave!! Can’t you see I’m doing fine?! I don’t need to see the other side!!” Luna practically screamed. She was shaking, a part of her wanted to rage at the chaos god, another wanted to cry. She didn’t know if she actually believe what she was saying, only that it was the ‘right’ thing to say.
Shaking their head, Mael stood up and pulled Luna into a hug, causing her to flinch “Is this really how you want to spend all of your days? Hiding your misery with parties and plays?”
Looking into the golden eyes, her own tearing up a little, Luna responded “but If I get mixxed up with you I’ll be hated once more. Disgraced and disowned, shunned just like before…”
“Maybe, but you’ll finally get to live a little and learn to laugh a little. Just let me give you the freedom to have dreams of your own. Come with me, let me cure your aching. Take your walls, and get them breaking. Now that’s a deal I think seems worth taking...but I guess I’ll leave that up to you...and if you’re so adamantly against it…” Mael said, letting go of Luna and floating over to the door.
“Wait!” cried Luna.
Mael turned around and raised a brow.
“Ok, I’ll admit, what you’re offering is intriguing, but to join you would cost me dearly...but...for the sake of argument...what did you have planned?”
Mael grinned “well…”
Back In Ponyville:
Diamond Tiara and Silverspoon had been tailing the CMC all day. Well, really, they were just peeking through the window of one of the local bars. The CMC had been in there for hours, sitting in a booth, laughing it up. It seems the stallions (and a few mares) in the bar were buying them drinks and flirting with them. Could you believe it! Ponies were actually flirting with those blank flank losers! It really boiled Diamond’s blood to see, but they had been here for hours. and it was starting to get boring. They needed a new strategy and fortunately one came walking by.
After calling out to a certain stallion, saying a few choice words, and taking one trip home and back, the three were now once again in the alley behind the bar.
Diamond Tiara gave a small package to the stallion, one of her old classmates whose name she couldn't currently remember, while Silver boredly glanced around to see if anypony was coming. Even if it was a rarity in ponyville, the last thing they needed was to get mugged in some dirty alley.
“Here you go, take it” said Diamond Tiara as she gave him a seemingly never used professional grade camera she owned. “Now, just like we agreed; you figure out and get some pictures of what those dorks are up to, and I’ll pay you fifty bits.”
“And…”
“And we won’t tease you about being a blank flank anymore” added Silver with an eye roll
“...and…”
“And you can keep the bucking camera! For Celestia’s sake!” Diamond said with a huff “It doesn’t even matter, my auntie got it for me. Wanted me to take up photography as a stupid hobby. Obviously it didn’t stick, photography is stupid!”
Smiling, Rumble gave a satisfied nod and got into position by the window, ready to start his mission.
The two rich ponies gave each other a look and a smirk. Now that they had somepony watching those losers’ every move, it was only a matter of time before they slip up and reveal whatever it was they were scheming. Leaving Rumble to it, they left to head back to Diamond’s home.
Back in Canterlot;
Mael had just finished telling Luna their grand plan. The night blue princess just stared, wide eyed and slack jawed.
“Amazing, isn’t it?” Mael asked.
“...very…”
“And you see how you have a special role to play? Something more than second fiddle to Sunbutt?”
“Yes, if what you say is true...if you could really pull it all off….” pondered Luna. If they could really achieve their goals, she could be...she would be...
“You would be free. Free to be yourself. To truly express yourself. Free to be you. So are you in? Will you join us?”
“Well…”
Mael grabbed Luna’s arm and twirled her. “Don’t you want to get away to this whole new part you get to play? You know I got what you need so come with us and take the ride. Come on to the other side!” Mael held out a hand “Deal?”
Luna stared at that hand for what seemed like an eternity. A part of her wanted to smack it away. A part of her wanted to tell at this chaotic trickster to get lost, that she’d never join them. But they weren’t a trickster, were they? Without them, she would forever be trailing behind her sister, stuck following HER desires, HER morals, HER ideals. This was Luna’s chance to break free, to finally and truly break free.
Meanwhile, in Ponyville:
It had seemed like forever to Rumble, but finally the cutiemark crusaders left the bar. He had been staring through the back window for almost thirty minutes before he realized he could just go in, sit in a booth, and comfortably observe them without looking so suspicious.
So there he sat, nursing a mug of hard cider, watching the crusaders as they talked and laughed with each other or accepting drinks and the occasional flirt from various bar patrons. Eventually they seemed to be ready to leave. He watched them pay their bill and go. From the amount of bits he saw them hand over it was a very small bill. Most likely, the only thing they had to pay for was their bar snacks, all their drinks being gifts. Quickly, he finished his own drink, left a couple bits on the table, and left to go follow.
As he hid around corners, watching as they move down the street, he noticed that there was no stagger to their step. None of them wobbled, or tripped, or leaned on one another. If he didn’t know better he’d say they were perfectly sober. But that couldn’t be possible, he himself saw them drinking steadily for over an hour!
Something weird was going on and he had to get to the bottom of it. Not only because he was being paid, but also because his own curiosity had been peaked. With a smirk, he gripped the camera hanging around his neck and continue tailing them.
After ten minutes of walking, the girls found themselves in front of the ponyville spa. With a giggle, they all rushed in and ordered the full treatment. Aloe, one of the spa-mares, asked Sweetie Belle if she and get friends were going to put it all on Rarity’s tab.
While very tempting, Sweetie had a better idea. With a smirk, she simply sung out that her and her friends should receive free treatment at this spa, forever. Should the twin spa-mares show themselves worthy, they’ll receive a great reward in time.
With that out of the way, the girls were brought back to the lockers, where they removed their clothes, showered off any excess dirt, and prepared to enter the small artificial hot springs. This was going to be fun, just what they needed on their day off.
Rumble had snuck into the spa while the twins had been distracted dealing with the CMC. He had managed to sneak into the locker room, where he found a sports bra on the floor that he suspected belonged to Scootaloo. He had even been tempted to take said sports bra for ‘evidence’...but he was no pervert, even if he may have grabbed it and rubbed the fabric a little. All for the sake of looking for clues and hidden pockets! Mares were notorious for hiding things in their bras, he was just looking for pockets! Totally reasonable!
Shaking his head and making sure he placed the bra exactly where he found it, he made his way to the entrance of the hot springs. Camera at the ready, he was going to get to the bottom of this!
Suddenly, he felt a hand on his shoulder. Turning around shocked, he stared into the smirking faces of the spa’s proprietors.
“Well well well, look what we have here” said Lotus with a smirk.
“A young stallion, trying to sneak a peek on a group of innocent mares” replied Aloe with a nod.
“No, w-wait, I wasn’t trying to peek! I mean, I was, but not like that! Wait, that didn’t come out right! W-wait! No, wait!! Let me explain!!” cried Rumble as he was dragged away.
Back in Canterlot:
Maelstrom decided to take a stroll through Canterlot. It was a nice day, and they were curious about the ongoings of Equestria’s capital. Also, a walk sounded nice. Donning their unicorn persona of Moonspark, the god of chaos casually made her way out the castle grounds and deep into the city.
The buildings of Canterlot weren’t neatly pressed together like you’d see in a more grid-like city. Sure they were nice and neat on the main streets, but if you were to slip behind them you’d find large back streets and winding alleys. There appeared to be smaller storefronts hidden in covered areas, and shady looking street vendors. There even appeared to be back areas and stairwells that led underground to more housing. One of the benefits to building a city on the side of a mountain.
Moon spent almost an hour just wandering around and exploring this maze of alleys, it seemed there was an interesting place around every corner. One such place caught her eye, it was a very narrow alleyway. What specifically caught her attention was that the normally stone or brick ground was instead grass, and she could hear faint music coming from down it. With her curiosity thoroughly peaked, she decided the only course of action would be to investigate.
Going down the alley, Moonspark found herself in a grassy little grotto. There were flowers, and vines along the limestone and brick walls. It was a little hidden garden! How quaint! She also seemed to have found the source of the music; it was a small crystal radio that seemed to belong to the pony who currently had their back to her.
The pony appeared to be a mare, if their curvy hips and butt were anything to go by. She was yellow, with a three toned mane and tail. She wore a dark grey sweater dress and what appeared to be tight leggings. She also appeared to be attempting to dance. Attempting and mildly failing. Her movements were jerky and it seemed like she was just striking certain poses rather than moving in time with the music. Moon wondered if this could possibly be intentional, some kind of performance art piece.
Moonspark leaned against a nearby wall, continuing to watch the mare attempt to dance. It was mildly amusing, but also, sweet and innocent in its own way. Here was a mare who obviously was trying to learn how to do something outside of her predestined talent. As a chaos god, Moonspark couldn’t help but find this admirable.
The mare had her back to the god this whole time, focusing solely on the book lying open on the ground in front of her. Step step, cross step, pose pose step. None of this was going right and she knew. With a grown of frustration she used her magic to turn off the radio with a sigh.
“Why’d you stop? You were just getting the hang of it...I think” said a voice behind her.
Moondancer whipped around, staring at the blue mare casually leaning against the far way. The unicorn did the only thing she could deem reasonable.
“AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!”
“Oh, for Boss’ sake, could you not?! Why is everyone screaming today??”
“Wh-who are you?! Why are you here?!?!?”
“Um, well, I’m Moonspark, and I’m here because I heard some music”
“Oh...um….how long were you standing there?...”
“Long enough to get the sense that you don’t know what you’re doing…”
Moondancer’s face couldn’t be any more red then it was.
As if things couldn’t be worse, a royal guard came rushing into the alley, sword drawn
“I heard screaming! What’s the problem here?!” he said, looking between the two mares.
“No problem. No problem at all.” responded Moonspark. With a grin she began talking in a sing songy voice. “In fact, you heard nothing. Go back to your normal patrol. Everything is fine here. In fact, everything is so find that you’re going to head back to the Royal Barracks and take a nap. If your commanding officer asks why you’re doing what you’re doing…..sing to him about how everything is awesome”
The guard’s eyes seemed to glaze over and he turned and walked away without a second word.
With was a moment of silence before Moondancer spoke up. “H-how did you do that?”
“Oh come now, you’re a unicorn” replied Moonspark with a smirk “you should know magic when you see it”
“But your horn didn’t light up or anything! There was no magic in the air! You just spoke and he did what you said! Who….no...WHAT are you?!” the unicorn asked nervously.
“I told you, I’m Moonspark”
“I don’t believe you…”
“Smart mare heh. But fine, you want an answer? It would take way too long to explain what? As for WHO I am. Who I really am. I’m Maelstrom. Equis’ new god of chaos”
"Don't lie to me! What are you really?!"
Moonspark just grinned and transformed back into their regular form. Stretching all four arms, Maelstrom stuck a pose "Lie? Why would I lie?" they said.
The timid unicorn first went wide eyed in shock, then looked warily at the god of chaos. Moondancer didn’t trust them, not if they were anything like Discord.
“By the way, you didn’t answer my question from before” Mael said. “Why did you stop dancing? I was rather enjoying it”
Moondancer scoffed “Don’t make fun of me! I know I’m terrible!” she said before looking down and sighing. “it’s just, my name is Moondancer, and I don’t know how to dance”
“Then go to a class and learn” responded Mael
“I was going to! But when I got there, I felt so embarrassed about not knowing anything about dancing that I just left...I figured I’d get some practice in on my own and then go back...but I can’t get these steps right! I’ve read all the books, I understand what I need to do, I just can’t get my hooves to do it!!” said Moondancer, throwing her hands up in defeat and plopping down onto the ground and pulling her legs against her chest.
“Why is learning to dance so important to you anyways?”
“Well...you see...I don’t have any friends anymore. I used to, I think, but they all left and forgot about me. I thought if I could dance it would help me attract more friends…” Moondancer said, playing with her fingers. Under her breath she added “...and maybe help me find a special somepony...”
Mael smiled and held out a hand “Well, dancing isn’t too hard. I’m gonna help you. Come on, up up!”
Moondancer stared at the hand for a minute, before slowly reaching out and taking it, allowing this strange being to pull her to her hoove “How are you going to help me?”
“I’m going to give you some pointers. Firstly, loosen your body, don’t be so stiff. Somepony with curves as nice as yours has absolutely no reason to move around so jerkily” Mael said, placing two of their hands on Moondancer’s hips, causing the mare to blush, both at the contact and the compliment.
“Now start moving”
Slowly, stiffly, Moondancer moved her body around like she remember the books told her too. Step one two three, step one two three, cross step, twirl, step step, cross step.
“No no no!” said Mael, shaking their head. They started swaying one of their hands in the air, as if conducting an orchestra. Moondancer was about to ask what they were doing until she started hearing music. It was light at first, seemingly carried on the wind, but it got louder and clearer. It seemed to flow through and around her, filling her up, she’d never heard anything like it.
“Now, start dancing again. This time, don’t think about it. Just move your body.” Mael hummed “Listen to the music and sing ‘oh, eyy, ohh’. Just move those left feet, come on get crazy. Anyone can do it; sing ‘Oh, eh, Ooh’”
As the sang, they used their hands to move Moondancers hips, pulling the blushing mare in close. Moondancer couldn’t help but move; it was like something was taking her over, making her dance. It didn’t feel bad, so she didn’t fight it. Her hooves moved, her arms flowed. Before she realized it, Mael had led her out of her tiny back alley hideaway and onto a main street.
She can’t let ponies see her like this! She tried to stop dancing but found she couldn’t. The music had a hold on her, it’s power forcing her to continue. She looked up at Mael in slight panic. The chaos god just looked back and smiled.
“Come on, show the world you got that fire! Feel the rhythm getting louder. Show them all what you can do. Prove to them you got the moves!” the god said, spinning Moondancer around and booping her nose playfully. Mael were having fun, Moondancer wanted to crawl into a hole from sheer embarrassment.
“I don’t know about you” Mael said with a wink and slowly began to sing again “But I feel better when I’m dancin, oooh yeah. Better when I’m dancing, yeah yeah!”
Turning to a nearby group of ponies who had been watching the spectacle, Mael smiled and continued to sing “We can do this together, I bet you all feel better when you’re dancing, yea yea yeah!”
The ambient music seemed to swell, as various ponies around the dancing duo had looks of surprise and shock, as if they were hearing the music for the first time. Some began to tap their hooves. Some patted their hands on tabletops to the beat. A lot, however, couldn’t help but begin dancing. Many dropped what they were doing, rushed out into the street and began dancing away without a care in the world.
While there were many eyes wide in surprise at the inability to stop, there wasn’t a single frown. There was no anger, or embarrassment. All were laughing, finding partners, and having a merry time.
Moondancer looked on in awe before she felt Mael pull her in close. Her shyness gone, she just let go and let the music move her. She danced around Mael before pulling away letting the music take her completely. She’d never felt so free in her life. She swayed and moved, bent and twirled, at that point all that mattered was the music and how it made her feel.
With a smile, she danced back over to Mael and wrapped her arms around the god, pressing herself against them as they danced together.
“Heh, you’ve finally let go, and you slayed that solo, ‘cause you listened to the music, oh, ey, oh” Mael sang “Now you’re confident babe, go on and make your hips sway. I knew that you could do it, oh, ey, ohh”
Mael spun Moondancer again before pulling the unicorn back in close. Moondancer just laughed, staring up at the god as they sang to her “you showed the world you got that fire. That rhythm’s pulsing through ya. You showed them all what you could do. Proved to them you got the moves, and I’m so proud of you. Don’t you feel better that you’re dancing? Ooo yea. Better that you’re dancing, oooh yeah. We can do it together, don’t you feel better that you’re dancing yea yea yeaaa!”
The next few minutes were filled with dancing, and impromptu celebration. Many more joined in, all were happy and full of cheer. Eventually the music died down and stopped, and with it the dancing. Some looked around disappointed, others went off to find more music to continue the festivities, one unicorn however gave a god of chaos a very tight hug.
“Thank you” Moondancer said “Thank you so much”
Mael smiled and hugged back “Anything for a friend” they said before teleporting away.
“...a friend…” Moondancer repeated softly, smiling.
With a new found skip to her step, Moondancer hummed and danced her way back home, a large grin on her face and happy tears in her eyes.
Chapter 6 - The Iron Pony
“Are you insane AJ?! We’ve been going through all sorts of crap because of him!” protested Rainbow as she and Applejack walked through the street of Ponyville towards a certain crystal castle. “You tried bucking apples with your head again didn’t you?”
“Oh come on, Ah only tried that once!” Applejack shot back, bringing a hand to her forehead and rubbing. Just remembering it caused her skull to ache, and the bump she got from the act was so big you’d think she was a unicorn.
The farmmare shook her head to clear it of the unpleasant memories and sighed “Look, a’know we’ve been through a lot of shenanigans cus of him, but he’s still our friend and Twilight’s little brother. ‘Sides, nopony can comment sports like him! Also, if he’s there, we can be keepin an eye on him. Double win”
Now it was Rainbow’s turn to sigh. She had to admit though, it was true, and rather clever. If she were completely honest with herself, her disdain wasn’t towards Disarray at all. His pranks and antics may be annoying, but that was is. Not to mention that as a pranker, something she prided herself on, even she had to admit his pranks were both very well thought out and executed nearly flawlessly. No, the source of all her anguish, and focus of her disdain, was that team of his. More specifically the young pegasus who had the nerve to proclaim herself as the fastest flyer not only in Equestria but on all of Equis. She had to prove this uppity mare wrong at all costs!
The duo arrived at Twilight castle and let themselves in, heading to the library to see if they could find their purple friend.
“Hm? Oh, good morning girls, can I help you with something?” asked Twilight, the mare in question relaxing and reading three books at once, all three suspended by her magic.
“Good ‘mornin to ya too, is Disarray home? This weekend we were hopin on havin our annual Iron Pony competition and were wonderin if he wants his old position as a presenter. Ya know how much he loved it last year”
“And how much more coherent he was than Pinkie…” mumbled Dash under her breath.
The purple princess led the two to the dragon’s door and gave a couple knocks. “Disarray, you have a couple visitors”
Slowly the door opened by itself and a deep voice spoke out. “Enter!”
The trio slowly, nervously, made their way inside. Once they were in, the door slammed shut behind them, causing them to jump a little.
“Come forward!” the voice commanded.
They began walking forward and Twilight used her horn to try and illuminate the room, however it was like the darkness was tangible. It was almost like a fog and they couldn’t see anything.
“Who DARES disturb the great and terrible DISARRAY!” the voice boomed out, purple flames igniting the floor in front of them.
As brave as they claim to be, Applejack and Rainbow Dash couldn’t help but cower a little. They were completely at his mercy here. There was so much darkness they couldn’t even see the door back. Anything could happen. Twilight bravely took a step forward. She was a little shaken, but it seemed she was somewhat used to this.
“Applejack and Rainbow Dash have come to visit you. They have something to ask you” she calmly explained. As jarring as the display was, it was just that, a display. Theatrics.
“Oh hey! Applejack, Rainbow! What can I do for you?” He asked casually, giving them a genuine smile as if nothing was out of the ordinary.
Twilight just shook her head, having gone through this every time she had to enter his room. Rainbow Dash couldn’t help but smirk. Her heart was pumping, and even she had to admit that gave her a start. Well played...well played she thought to herself.
Applejack forced a smile back at the dragon and spoke up “Ya see, tomorrow Rainbow an Ah are havin our annual Iron Pony competition, and we were wonderin if you wanted to be our presenter again. Ya know, just for old times sake…”
Disarray was touched. After everything that had happened, they were still trying to keep things like how they were. Problem was, things weren’t like how they were, things change, people change. He truthfully didn’t have any real problems with being a presenter, but a better opportunity just presented itself and he’d be bad at his job if he didn’t jump on it. Politely, he declined their offer.
“Sorry girls, I’m going to be rather busy around that time, so I won’t be able to do it. Thanks for asking through, knowing that you’re thinking of little old me makes me really happy”
The mares nodded, understanding that he was a very busy dragon now, but also suspected that what he’ll be busy with will be some kind of mischief. They excused themselves from his room, the door shutting behind them by itself.
Once they were back at the castle entrance, Rainbow spoke up. “He said he had plans. AJ, if he tries to ruin the competition I swear I’ll-”
“Calm down Dash” Applejack cut in “He’s still our friend, only just a lot more annoying. However, Disarray is still the same ol Spike”
Twilight nodded “and knowing him, he’ll probably just use your competition to keep all of us distracted while he makes his actual move. I’ve been analyzing all his patterns in an attempt to anticipate when and where he’ll strike next so we can be ready”
Applejack laughed and slapped Rainbow on the back “Ha! See? Twilight’s got it covered, ‘sides, if he does try somethin and ruins the competition, at least it’ll save ya from your imminent defeat!”
“As if!” retorted Rainbow Dash, punching Applejack in the arm before both turned to head to their respective homes to prepare and get some last minute training in for the big event.
Just like last year, Pinkie Pie was up bright and early, ready to narrate all the happenings during this great competition between the two most competitive athletes in all of Ponyville, if not Equestria. It was a competition they themselves invented several years ago. Originally it was a private event, but as more ponies learned of it, and more started coming to see, it soon became an official holiday for the town. Shops closed early and some even set up mobile carts to try and sell wares. Seating was set up. The Cakes and Apples sold concessions. It had really become quite the spectacle.
Sitting in an announcer booth and tapping on her microphone a few times to make sure it was on, Pinkie Pie took a deep breath and spoke with the enthusiasm only one such as Pinkie Pie could muster.
“Heya all you mares and gentlecolts! I’m your host Pinkie Pie; welcome to the annual Iron Pony Competition!!!”
The crowd cheered and applauded.
“And I’m your co-host, Party Pop!” said a black earth mare who had seemingly appeared out of thin air, casually sitting next to Pinkie. Just like the other Masters of Mayhem the mare had black fur, but her eyes, hair, and tail were bright yellow. She wore a sleeveless top covered in plaid that exposed her midriff, along with yellow plaid pants and a studded belt that loosely hung off her hips, her short neck length hair was wild and spikey.
Without missing a beat, Party Pop continued talking. “Pinkie, this marks the fifth time two of our favorite overly competitive mares will come together and face off head to head to prove to each other and Ponyville who is the Iron Pony! This competition will push them to their limits and beyond! As you remember, last year saw Applejack’s victory, after the devastating defeat brought on by Rainbow Dash the year prior. This will be the year to break their tie! Will Applejack keep the momentum or will Rainbow Dash take the win?!”
Pinkie Pie just grinned at the interruption.
“Hiya! I’m Pinkie Pie, I don’t know you yet!” she said, suddenly going wide eyed and giving and overly exaggerated gasp “are you MY nemesis?!” she asked excitedly.
Pop nodded with her own grin “Yuppers! I’m Party Pop, it’s nice to officially meet you Pinkie Pie!”
The pink party pony giggled “I just LOOOOOOVVVEEEE your name! It’s reeaalllyy nice to meet you and I hope we become great enemies!” she said, before leaning over and giving a sideways hug.
Pop hugged back “I hope so too Pinkie, but right now we need to get back to the competition”
Pinkie nodded as Pop picked up her mic and, with a grin, addressed the crowd once more.
“It is my pleasure to introduce to you all two new challengers! Late entries into this grand event!” she said with a laugh.
The crowd murmured to each other, wondering who these new mystery competitors could be. Applejack and Rainbow Dash, who were off to the side stretching, looked at each other and frowned. It would be bad if these new challengers are who they think they’ll be. This didn’t sound good at all, and who was this new shadowy pony?
The crowd continued to murmer amongst themselves. The appearance of a Master of Mayhem, a new one at that, spawned excitement in some, and dread in others. Maelstrom, this new god of chaos, had developed a reputation in Equestria as a harbinger of excitement and entertainment among a large number of ponies. Their Masters of Mayhem had been nicknamed the Master of Fun by a nice sized chunk of the population, especially among children. Many greatly enjoyed the pranks and antics they pulled. Sure they could be rather inconvenient at times, but so many ponies enjoyed themselves, and most could look back on them with a smile on their face. Chaos was starting to become synonymous with fun.
So the crowd waited with bated breath. Finally, they appeared. It was just as Applejack and Rainbow feared; their new challengers were Bad Seed and Shadow Blitz.
“Some of you are aware, but most of you aren’t so let me explain some very interesting tidbits of information” said Pop “These two Masters of Mayhem, Bad Seed and Shadow Blitz, have been granted all the abilities of Applejack and Rainbow Dash, respectively. This means they’re just as strong as them, just as fast as them, just as agile, just as endurant, equals in almost every way. They are their counterparts; their true rivals! Yes, today we are going to have a true competition; Harmony vs Chaos! We, the Masters of Mayhem, are going to prove today, for you all, that harmony can’t beat us!” yelled out Pop.
There was complete silence. You could hear a piece of hay drop. Suddenly the crowd erupted in cheers, excited to see what could become the greatest Iron Pony competition in Ponyville history! Now, it wasn’t just a nice event to watch two friends compete against each other, this was a full out battle between the forces of harmony and the forces of chaos. Which side was stronger? This was going to be the event of the decade!
Rainbow frowned, smirking a bit as she marched over to Blitz.
“You know what, I’m glad you decided to crash the competition. I get to prove once and for all that I’m better than you! I get to finally put a smug little wanna-be in her place!”
Applejack marched over as well, scowling “Don’t waste your breath Rainbow. You know they’re just going to cheat. They’re villains after all”
Seed grinned at Applejack, much to Applejack’s discomfort. “Ah promise ah won’t use any plants or nothin to cheat! Cross mah heart, hope ta fly, stick a cupcake in mah eye!”
Blitz nodded “And I Pinkie-promise to not use any crazy weather to cheat in this competition; cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye”
Applejack eyed the two of them, her frown never leaving her face “Y’all know what Ah’m talking about. Rainbow and Ah are true athletes! We’ve been trainin our whole lives to be strong and fast. Ya both just get yer powers from magic!”
Bad Seed just raised a brow, her sister’s comment washing over her like it was nothing. While her sister was right, she DID get her powers originally from magic. All the training she herself had gone through? She did that on her own. SHE took what she was given and learned how to use it. SHE went and spent countless hours in time bubbles in their gym training and honing all her new abilities. SHE studied and learned all sorts of different types of combat techniques. The way she saw it, she was every bit the athlete her sister was, if not more so. No, definitely more so! Her sister was strong because of all of her farmwork, not because she was actually training for anything, or had any real goals or motivations. No, it was just because she got up every day and bucked trees, something she wouldn’t let her little sister do because she thought Applebloom would hurt herself. This was her chance to really show up her sister and show what REAL training could do. What SHE could do if given the chance.
Shadow Blitz felt the same way. Rainbow Dash was naturally fast, but that was it. Sure she loved to race around at top speed, and sure she received basic wonderbolt training. But that was it. Blitz studied air combat styles of fighting. She practiced every morning in the gym; speeding up, breaking, banking, barrel rolls, dives, everything. She could get up to full speed in a second and come to a complete stop just as fast. She could turn on a bit and weave through almost anything. Sure she was given her speed magically, but she worked her flank off to master it, so who were they to say she wasn’t a real athlete!
“Fine, fine, we get it!” Blitz said, hiding her anger at Applejack’s comment. “All this chit chat! If you both don’t want us to show Ponyville how weak you both are compared to us, then just say so, it’s really all you had to say!”
Seed smiled, she knew exactly what Blitz was doing. They knew their sisters. They knew they couldn’t resist a challenge, especially one that insulted their pride directly.
“Now just hold on a minute! We ain’t say nothin about not being able to handle ya two!” Applejack said. “Fine, we’ll take yer challenge, but only just to put you two in your place!”
Rainbow nodded “And that place is under our hooves!”
“So, it’s settled then and now it’s time to start our FRIENDLY competition between Harmony and Chaos!”
The crowd once again erupted into cheers.
“Representing Harmony, we have Applejack and Rainbow Dash! Challenging them and representing Chaos, we introduce to you two of your Masters of Mayhem; Bad Seed and Shadow Blitz!” Pinkie continues, gesturing to her two friends and their dark counterparts whom she hasn’t really had the chance to make friends with yet.
“Are you ready?!” shouted Party Pop excitedly.
The crowd cheered louder and there were some chants started for both chaos and harmony. Even the other Elements, who had been sitting off to the side, shouted their support to their friends.
“I want them to win, for Harmony’s sake. However, if they were to lose to their rivals, it might shrink Rainbow Dash and Applejack’s egos a tad. I know it may sound a little mean spirited, but a loss may be just what they need; a nice slice of humble pie” commented Rarity to the two friends sitting next to her.
“I bet you ten bits that Disarray or Maelstrom will swoop in and stop the competition if it seems chaos has the disadvantage or help those two cheat somehow” sighed Twilight, already seeing various ways they could do it. They promised THEY wouldn’t cheat, not that any of the other Masters, or the god of chaos themselves couldn’t or wouldn’t interfire. Yes, Twilight had them figured out. The question now, was HOW it was going to happen.
Meanwhile, back in Ponyville, Sweetie Belle was lounging on a bench, enjoying the quiet day. With nearly everypony over at the competition, the town was silent save for the breeze and the chirps of birds. There was a peace there, and she couldn’t help but hum a little tune to herself.
Seemly unnoticed by her, Rumble was hiding on a rooftop across the street, camera around his neck and binoculars in his hands. He had been tailing the cutiemark crusaders for a few days now, trying to figure out what they were up to. So far his efforts had been met with failure and some rather embarrassing moments. He hadn’t given up yet though.
“Everypony is watching the competition, so why would Sweetie be sitting there alone?” he wondered to himself.
He had been following her ever since she had left Carousel Boutique. So far she’d been the only crusader he’d seen all day and he had originally assumed she was waiting to meet up with them. However, that didn’t fully add up. Usually the crusaders met at their tree house. He knew this because they had invited him to do some crusading in the past. He also knew that even though they’re young adults now they still meet up there.
This had to be it, this had to be the big moment. She was going to meet up with the other crusaders and they were going to pull off some crazy big stunt to try and earn their cutiemarks, he just knew it!
Over on the bench, Sweetie had her eyes closed, contently humming to herself when she felt the a wave of heat to her left. She turned and opened her eyes, smiling at the black drake next to her.
“Heya Disarray”
The dragon smiled “Heya ‘Sweetie Belle’, thanks again for deciding to spend the day with me. I know you wanted to watch the competition and you’re missing it because of me. I promise when we’re finished I’ll get you anything you want to make up for it. ”
Sweetie gave a slight blush and stood up, giving Disarray a sideways hug “hey, don’t worry about it, we’re friends right? Well, what are friends for? Besides, I really enjoy spending time with you, you don’t have to buy my anything”
“But...”
“No buts! Now, what did you have planned for the day?” Sweetie giggled.
As Disarray went over his plans for setting up small pranks with proximity triggers all around ponyville to the giggling Sweetie Belle, Rumble stared at the duo wide eyed from his hiding spot.
“T-that’s DIsarray! What is the world is Sweetie Belle doing with one of the new chaos gods?! Maybe they’re an item? Oh man, her sister isn’t going to like that!” he said, raising the camera and snapping a few photos of the two. “Either way, I hope this is enough for Diamond and Silver”
As he was snapping the pictures Sweetie decided to change into her natural chaotic form, as the streets were clear and there was no one around to see. Nearly no one. Rumble couldn’t believe his eyes! Sweetie Belle was Hymnphonic, one of the Master of Mayhem. Wait, if Sweetie Belle was Hymnphonic, does that mean the rest of CMC were the other chaos gods?!
He kept taking pictures, watching at the duo laughed and walked around a corner out of sight. He gave a huge sigh, he’d done it. He not only figured it out, he got a picture of Sweetie Belle, or rather Hymnphonic, mid transformation.
“I thought Diamond Tiara was just being paranoid, but she was right! They really were up to something, something HUGE! I gotta hurry and get these photos developed and tell Diamond and Silver!” he exclaimed.
“Now why would you go and do a silly thing like that?” said a voice behind him.
Rumble went wide eyed, spinning around to come face to face with Disarray and Hymn themselves, the duo lazily floating in the air.
“I, um, I mean!” Rumble stuttered “Th-they told me to! I mean, they’re paying me to find out what the cutiemark crusaders were up to!”
Rumble wasn’t stupid. Before him floated two gods of chaos. He had lived their some of their pranks and heard the stories of other. He knew what they could do. One had the power to warp his reality into anything they wanted, and the other could hypnotise him into behaving anyway they chose. They found him out, they knew he was up here, what else did they know? He didn’t want to find out how they’d react to him lying to them.
“Ha, nothing. They’re up to nothing!” Hymphonic said, showing him the quarter note on her shoulder “As you can see, the cutiemark crusaders are no more”
Disarray slowly shook his head as he landed on the rooftop in front of the shaking Rumble. “Either way, you thought you were tailing the CMC. Why would you rat them out to Diamond Tiara of all ponies? You’re a blank flank too after all, why are you REALLY helping her?”
Rumble just looked down sadly “She...she promised she’d stop bullying me…” he said “Do you have any idea what it’s like to be eighteen and still a blank flank?! The looks you get?! The comments?!” Rumble sighed. “The things ponies say when they think you can’t hear…”
“Yes, actually, I do…” Hymnphonic said, landing next to Diarray. She leaned over and looked Rumble in the eyes “What if we protected you from her bullying, hm?”
“What if we did one better and gave him the power to do it himself?” Disarray said with a smirk.
Hymnphonic looked over to the drake, a dark grin forming on her own face “You don’t mean…”
Disarray nodded, and in a burst of purple flame, the three of them were gone.
Back at the competition:
“Now, with both teams tied with three point each; these next events will determine who is going home a victor or a loser!” said Pinkie. “Just a recap for those who may have been distracted or elsewhere; the Ponyshoe throwing competition that tested our combatants in both strength and accuracy ended with a draw between Bad Seed and Rainbow Dash! Next, the pumpkin chuckin catapult contest also ended with a draw! Each contestant earning ten point! Finally, the obstacle course race ended in a tie between Shadow Blitz and Applejack, with Bad Seed just behind and Rainbow Dash getting stuck in the mud pit! Wowy Zowy this event has really been heating up!”
“Right you are Pinkie!” exclaimed Pop enthusiastically “And this next contest will be the perfect way to cool off! This is arguably one of the most challenging challenges here at the Iron Pony Competition! I am of course talking about The Barrel Roll!”
The crowd exploded in chants and cheers as Pinkie nodded her head, a huge smile on her face. She was really enjoying her time with her rival. They made the perfect announcer duo!
“That’s right! The Barrel Roll!” she practically screamed into her mic “This challenge will test out contestants not on raw power, but on skill, balance, and endurance! We’re ready to roll out the barrels of fun! Are you ponies ready?!?!”
The crowd cheered louder as both teams of Harmony and Chaos positioned themselves in front of the a large pool of water as Big Mac chucked empty barrels in. Once all four huge barrels were in place a whistle sounded and all four hopped onto one and began rolling them, going faster and faster.
The crowd was enjoying every second of this. Some cheered, some sat with baited breath, some even took bets on who they thought was going to win. This was quality entertainment right here, and it was awesome!
Applejack decided to push for the lead and provoke her rival all in one move. She lifted one leg and began hopping along the barrel, still keeping it’s speed and her balance as if it were as easy as walking. “See, Bad Seed? There ain’t nothin better than honest hard training and constant hard work. Everyday, working hard to get stronger. The RIGHT way!” she said.
“Ohhh, that’s a two point maneuver right there!” Pinkie exclaimed, writing on a piece of paper. Pop nodded in agreement.
In retaliation to Applejack’s move, Bad Seed did a backflip and balanced on her hands, still keeping her barrel’s speed “Just cus Ah got yer powers from magic, don’t mean I don’t know how to use em!” she shot back.
“And that’s easily a five point maneuver! Two for the backflip, three for the handstand!” said Pop, writing on her own piece of paper.
Pinkie nodded in agreement to Pop’s judgement “This is going to get wild!”
Applejack gritted her teeth, she wasn’t going to let Bad Seed show her up. She flipped forward onto her own hands, keeping pace with Seed.
“Four points for Applejack!” Pinkie said.
“FOUR!?” cried Applejack, glaring over at the announcers’ booth.
“One for the front flip, three four the handstand!”
Applejack sighed, feeling it was a fair call, and instead focused her attention on Seed. By this point they both were starting to sweat, both glaring at their rival in an attempt to intimidate the other.
Over with Rainbow Dash and Shadow Blitz, things were getting just as intense. With a smirk, Blitz jumped and performed three arial back flips before landing back on her barrel. Her giant bat wings were larger than that average pegasi, giving her a large advantage in endurance and balance.
“Woah! Six points for Blitz!” Pop said as Blitz leaped into the air again, landing on her hands and then flipping back to her hooves “And a two point maneuver!”
“Holy Cannoli! yelled Pinkie “Team Chaos is dominating the battlefield! Can Team Harmony catch up?!”
Blitz grinned at hearing that, winking at Dash
“Catch up? I doubt it, ha!”
“Using those freakishly huge wings is cheating!” protested Rainbow Dash, who was desperately using her own wings for balance as she attempted to speed up to match the spin of Blitz’s barrel.
The competition was intense, but the four contestants were tiring out. Still, Blitz kept a smug look on her face, showing no hit of exhaustion to her rival, giving off the attitude that she knew she was going to win. Dash couldn’t accept that, she was the only one who hadn’t really done any tricks yet, and hence didn’t have any extra points. That was unacceptable! She came up with new tricks all the time! No, she wasn’t going to get shown up here! She couldn’t!
With a hard flap of her wings, Rainbow Dash launched herself in the air, did two flips, and prepared to land on a single hand. She’d take the lead for sure! Unfortunately she miscalculated and landed on her face instead.
“Rainbow Dash is disqualified!” announced Party Pop and Pinkie Pie together as Dash splashed into the cool waters of the pool.
Applejack frowned, she was going to have to bring it since RD was out. She flipped forward, landing on her hands, then used the momentum to flip again to land on her hooves, She keep this going, using the spin of the barrel itself to help her, five times before sticking the landing and going back to spinning her barrel.
“Wowy! Ten points for Applejack!” cheered Pinkie
“Wow!” exclaimed Pop “Team Chaos is going to have to do something incredible to beat this! Can they do it!?”
“Looks like the good guys are back in the lead” giggle Pinkie Pie
“We still have two members on the field though!” reminded Party Pop.
Pinkie just blew a raspberry at Pop, who blew one right back.
Back in the pool, Bad Seed scowled at Applejack “Anything you can do, Ah can do better!” she yelled out, flipping forward as well in an attempt to mimic the move. She, however, miscalculated the speed of her barrel and ended up slipping up and falling into the water. She frowned and turned to Blitz “Crab apples! It’s all up to you now!” she called to her friend.
Applejack stared at Shadow Blitz, who just grinned and flipped forward. One time, two times, three times, four times, five times, six times, seven times, and then with a might flap of her wings she launched into the air and somersaulted, landing on her hands with perfect balance.
“That’s...That’s a nineteen point maneuver!” yelled out Pop.
Applejack grit her teeth, but groaned. She was at her limit. She knew she could keep her balance and speed a little longer, but there was no way she could pull off any more tricks; she just didn’t have any energy left. In the end, Applejack sighed and hopped off the barrel into the water; admitting her defeat.
“With Applejack calling it quits, Shadow Blitz wins! That means another point for Team Chaos!” called out Party Pop.
Blitz grinned and hopped off the barrel and used her magic to form a purple cloud in the air. The cloud began raining sports drink over a patch of pitcher plants Bad Seed grew, filling them up with the refreshing beverage. The two gestured to their rivals.
“Thanks…” said Rainbow begrudgingly as she took a pitcher and began drinking. She couldn’t believe that not only had she been the first one to lose, she didn’t even score any points! Not only that, her rival was the one who won! She won’t forget this!
“Come on girls! We can’t let them get the lead like this! The bad guys aren’t supposed to win!!” shouted Pinkie. Applejack and Rainbow Dash gritted their teeth in frustration, but they dug down deep and used that anger to fuel their determination.
The next contest was the tug-of-war. It being a contest of pure strength and not skill, Applejack and Bad Seed were evenly matched. The decided factor was Blitz’s wings. Their larger size gave them more back thrust than Dash’s resulting in another win for Chaos.
After that was a dart throwing competition. Years of playing darts at various pubs made Rainbow Dash confident in her abilities, and Applejack knew she had a keen eye. In all rights, team Harmony should have won, if not for the fact that Team Chaos’s combat training with Maelstrom included throwing weapons. It was close, but Team Chaos took the win.
“This just isn’t fair!” cried Rainbow Dash, as the teams took an intermission to rest and gave the crowds a change to stretch their legs and get more snacks. “They’re cheating somehow!”
“Of course they’re cheatin!” said Applejack angrily “It’s what they do, they lie and cheat! Don’t let it get to you though, we gotta keep on, we can’t go givin up!”
“Why not?! They’re just going to keep on cheating!!!”
“Cus even if they keep cheatin, we’ll come through in the end. We stand for Harmony,and Harmony will always defeat chaos” Applejack said, holding her head high.
Rainbow nodded, feeling a new fire burn within her “Yea! We’re the good guys, and the good guys don’t lose!”
They gave each other a fist bump as their friends walked over.
“How are you two holding up?” asked Twilight, using her magic to make sure her friends weren’t injured or too fatigued.
“We’re fine. Better than fine!” Rainbow proclaimed, standing up and stretching.
Applejack nodded and stretched as well.
Fluttershy, who has been quietly observing her friends gave a worried look before speaking up “But, Team Chaos...”
“Team Chaos will get theirs in the end, just like every other baddie we had to fight!” proclaimed Applejack “Cheaters never win”
Inside the dimensionally altered ex-cutiemark crusaders treehouse that doubled as the temporary regional office of the Masters of Mayhem, Maelstrom was looking over several proposals and reports presented to them by their properly primed proteges.
Similarly to how Celestia made Twilight send her friendship reports, Mael had their team constantly send them reports and updates on their various acts of chaos, mayhem, and general disarray. The main difference between the two mentors, however, was that Mael was doing it to file and send up the corporate ladder, as it was part of the job. Celestia was doing it to be a control freak.
There was a burst of heat and purple flame, causing Maelstrom to look up from the papers in front of them and smile.
“Disarray, Hymnphonic, what a pleasant surprise. I thought you two were still out on your date” they said.
The two in question stuttered and blushed.
“I-it wasn’t a date! We were just hanging out! As friends!” said Disarray.
“Y-yeah! We can totally hang out as just...you know….friends and stuff…” said Hymnphonic.
Maelstrom burst out laughing “You two are too easy to fluster, haha”
There was a second bit of snickering from pony number two in the room, causing Mael to lift a brow “and who is this?”
Without a chance to blink, Mael had teleported right in front of Rumble, looking them over. The stallion had immediately stopped his snickering and stared wide eyed at the chaos god. Disarray and Hymnphonic intimidated him, and he grew up with them when they were...well...not gods! This being though. Maelstrom. It was something else. Just being in their presence felt other worldly, and if he squinted he could see reality itself seem to bend a little just by the presence of this three eyed deity.
Mael continued to look him over as the two masters of mayhem spoke up.
“This is Rumble, we’ve known him since we were foals” said Hymn “we was trying to spy on us for Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon. They constantly pick on him for being a blank flank and promised they’d stop if he could figure out what the cutiemark crusaders were up to”
“Blank flank huh?” Mael muttered, looking the stallion in the eyes “weren’t expecting to end up here huh?”
“N-n-no….” Rumble stuttered out.
“Relax, I’m not going to hurt you. Now, why do you think you’re here?”
“I-I don’t know. Sweetie, I mean Hymnphonic, said they’d protect me from Diamond and Silver, but then Disarray said something about giving me the power to fight them off on my own. Then there was a lot of purple fire, and I was here. Please don’t hurt me! I didn’t mean to spy on the masters of mayhem!! I mean, I did, but I didn’t know they were the new gods of chaos! I’m sorry! I’m sorry!!”
Mael turned to Disarray and raised a brow, as if to silently ask ‘really?...’
Disarray in turn shrugged and spoke up “You were looking for another pegasus…”
Mael sighed but trusted Disarray’s judgement, sitting back down at one of the conference table chairs and gesturing to Rumble to do the same.
“So, Rumble was it? Tell me about yourself, your life, your family. Hymn says you’re a blank flank right? Bit old to still be bare, why do you think that is?”
Rumble sighed and looked down “I dunno...my family are all Wonderbolts. My parents, my brother...I’m supposed to be a Wonderbolt too eventually, that’s what they say…”
“Are you not good at flying?” asked Mael
Rumble shook his head furiously “I’m GREAT at flying! I mean, I’m no Rainbow Dash, but my family has taught me more arial tricks than anypony I know! Everything ever written in training manuals, and techniques they said were in the family for generations!”
“So then, if you’re so talented, why still blank?”
“I….I mean….I don’t know….” Rumbled sighed again.
Disarray and especially Hymn gave him a sympathetic look. It was painful to talk about, but necessary for Mael to make a decision.
“I mean, I talk to Devil and-” Rumble continued before he was cut off
“Wait, Devil? Who’s that?” asked Mael, interest peaked.
“My pet rabbit, Devil Bunny. She’s just the sweetest thing, and always has the best advice!” Rumble said with a huge grin, remember his bestest friend in the world.
“And...you talk to her?” Mael asked, a small smirk growing on their face
“Yea, we talk all the time, she’s always there to lend an ear”
“But you understand her…”
“I understand all animals, always been able to, they can be real chatterboxes sometimes though. Why? What does that have to do with anything?”
Mael just grinned, turning to look at the other two. Disarray was also just grinning, while Hymn both smirked and facepalmed.
Turning back to Rumble, Maelstrom smiled and placed a small stack of papers on the table, pulling them seemingly out of nowhere.
“So, where’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to give you the powers to fight your bullies. I’m going to help you get your cutiemark, AND much more. All you gotta do is sign right here. So how about it?”
Rumble read the first couple paragraphs of the contract before going wide eyed, his head shooting up to stare dumbly at god and then over to the other two who were nodding at him encouragingly.
“You...you’re offering me a job?”
Mael nodded “That’s right. So, ever wanted to be a god?”
Things were really heating up at the Iron Pony competition.
“Recapping, for those who weren’t paying attention!” cried out Pop
“Or those who were elsewhere!” cried out Pinkie
“Things have been wild here! Team Chaos and Team Harmony have both donned their swimwear and are going at it in one of the most highly watched sports among stallions. I’m of course talking about Volleyball! Man it’s a good thing this isn’t a body contest or Team Chaos would have mopped the floor with Team Harmony” said Pop
Pinkie Pie held back a giggle and playfully punched her rival in the arm “Thats mean” she said, with a smirk, adding with a whisper “but true…”
Pop grinned and kept going “Well none of our combatants are really working with much, Applejack and Bad Seed being more bottom heavy, and Shadow Blitz being more athletic and aerodynamic….Rainbow Dash’s complete lack of...well...anything, top or bottom, deals a devastating blow to Team Harmony”
“HEY!” screamed out Rainbow Dash
“But thank goodness this isn’t that kind of competition! Instead our competitors will have to use skill and power, along with teamwork, to win. From the looks of things, both teams have the teamwork aspect down, but Harmony seems to be pulling ahead steadily. They may win this one! Go Team Harmony!” cheered Pinkie.
Pop shook her head and shrugged “I’m not one for throwing in the towel, but when you’re right, you’re right. This round just isn’t ours”
The two teams in question had been in a very intense volleyball match. At first, the two teams seemed tied, but Team Harmony used their frustration of losing even a single round to their rivals to fuel their determination.
Applejack and Rainbow Dash were using every maneuver they knew, and even some they came up with on the spot, to pull into the lead. Rainbow Dash would constantly dive, having nothing on her chest to worry about, and use her wings to save a spiked ball, and Applejack would spike it over with as much force as she could muster.
Applejack's spikes were so powerful in fact that they left small creators in the sand. The only pony who would hope to save and return such a spike was Bad Seed, and that was only if she could see it coming and start a counter swing in time, if not than it was a broken wrist, something she didn’t want.
In the end, Team Harmony won. Using their ‘righteous fury’ they pulled through. They did it again at the next event, double dutch.
The crowds were going wild, the loudest amongst them being the other three members of the mane six. It seemed that Team Harmony finally found their groove.
“We just gotta win this last one and we got it!” said Rainbow Dash as the four combatants walked over to the area where the last event was going to be hosted.
That last event was The Barrel Throw. Each combatant had to throw an empty barrel as far as they could. Unlike the Pumpkin Chucking contest, which was more about accuracy, this was was about pure strength and power. Team Harmony was hoping to bring it home with this one. After all, Applejack was one of the strongest mares in Equestria.
The contestants moved to the waiting area as Rainbow Dash moved into place, being the first to go. She picked up her barrel and used her wings to launch herself into the air. She flew in tiny little circles, building momentum until she let go and sent the barrel flying. It went far, but not very.
Rainbow Dash smuggly walked back over to the waiting area as Shadow took her place and threw how own barrel. Even with her larger wings, it seems there was a trick to throwing them that she didn’t understand because it didn’t go as far as Rainbow’s.
Team Harmony was in the lead, and it was Applejacks turn, meaning it was going to stay that way. The two harmony teammates gave each other a smile and a firsbump as Applejack walked out and took her place. Time to end this.
Taking the barrel with both hands she picked it up and began spinning, going faster and faster before releasing and sending the barrel flying; it easily going three times as far as Rainbow Dash’s.
Now it was Bad Seed’s turn. It was all down to this. The crowd was silent as she moved into position, picked up her barrel, and began spinning with it as well. Faster and faster she went until she released it and sent it sailing. It kept going and going before landing seemingly right next to Applejack’s.
There were mutters and murmurs going through the crowd. Could it be they tied again? Big Mac ran out with a long measuring tape and got to it, Applejack calling out to him.
“It….ain’t actually tied is it?....”
After a minute or two of measuring, Big Mac gave his answer.
“Eeyup”
“What?! No! It can’t be tied, I demand a second opinion!” cried Rainbow Dash.
A second measuring tape floated out of nowhere as Rarity and the others came walking over.
“Allow me, Darling” said the fashionista, who also began measuring the distance of the barrels. Her face went from calm, to curious, then to slightly amused as she looked over at her two friends “It would seem that it really is tied..”
“If it’s a tie than that means…..TEAM CHAOS WINS!” cried out Pop, the sky lighting up with fireworks and raining confetti. The crowds roared and cheered. This had been a great Iron Pony event!
“Wait! Wins?!” screamed the five other members of Team Harmony.
Pinkie Pie nodded, pointing to the talley board “With that last tie, Team Chaos kept their lead. They win, six to five! Guys, I know we lost, and that sucks and all, but I'm still throwing a party right? Right?!?!”
“No need, I got that covered!” giggled Party pop, leaning over and giving her rival a sideways hug before bounding off to join her friends, who had been excitedly hopping up and down at their victory.
Applejack and Rainbow Dash were furious!
“This just ain’t right! How could they win?! They were cheatin, I just know it!” said Applejack in a huff.
“I don’t think so” replied Twilight “I had been monitoring the whole event, scanning them for any flares of chaos magic. There wasn’t any. Maelstrom and Disarray didn’t even show up to help them or stop you. As far as I can tell, they won fair and square”
“But...That means…” grumbled Rainbow
“That means you lost fair and square” said Rarity “Now, be angry all you want, but go and congratulate your rivals. It would be unsportsmare-like to sit here brood about your lose. You do pride yourselves on being true antheles after all”
The duo sighed
“Yer right….we gotta be the better mare and take the high road. It’s only proper” said Applejack as the two walked over to the still celebrating Masters of Mayhem.
“Good job…..on winning and stuff….” muttered Rainbow through slightly clenched teeth, holding out a hand.
“Yea….good job…” said Applejack.
Their rivals bounded over and eagerly shook the hands.
“Yea! It was fun!” said Bad Seed with a huge grin.
“Same time next year?” ask Shadow Blitz with a cocky smile.
There was silence for a few seconds as Applejack and Rainbow Dash just looked at their rivals, then each other; a smile starting to creep onto their faces.
“You know what? Yea! Same time next year!” replied Rainbow with a huge smile
“We’ll beat ya then fer sure!” Applejack said with one last harty shake of Bad Seed’s hand.
“Well, as heartwarming as it is, seeing rivals come together, these two have a celebratory party to go to!” interjected Party Pop as she grabbed her friends and started pulling them towards the nearly door to a supply shed.
“Party?! Can we go?! Pllleeeeeaaaassseeee?????” cried Pinkie, popping out of nowhere.
With a smirk, Pop opened the door and winked “Sorry, Chaos only, you’re not ready for a Party Pop party. See ya rival!” she said before her and the other two disappeared through the doorway, the door shutting behind them before Pinkie Pie could bolt through.
The party mare threw open the door, only to reveal the partially empty supply closet.
“Awwwwwwwww…....”
It had been a little over two months since Disarray had accepted the job as a god of chaos. However, even though they were supposed to be enemies, Twilight and Disarray still shared a strong sibling bond. If Twilight were honest with herself, she somewhat enjoyed Disarray’s constant small pranks around the castle. It was making her mentally quick on her hooves and forcing her to think tactically. The brain teasers she used to do every morning could be completed in a forth of the time now. Her memorization, which was already impressive, was now twice as good. Yes, she could feel herself growing mentally stronger everyday.
It was similar for Disarray. Matching minds with Twilight meant constantly innovating and coming up with something new and unexpected. He was constantly pushed beyond the limits of his imagination and creativity. He was always trying his best to think outside the box, and see things every way possible, and even personalize pranks to fit the prankee for maximum enjoyment.
Yes, the two weren’t enemies in the slightest. They enjoyed their battles of wits, it was fun for both. Twilight would even go so far as to admit that her baby brother made for a very decent rival.
So it was odd to her that this morning there was...well...nothing. Her door wasn’t enchantedly locked with the riddle of the day, she didn’t have to figure out a complex tile pattern to traverse the hallways, nor did she have to levitate herself through a maze of super slippery soap bubbles. There were no showers full of slime, or sentient slippers, or even singing pants. No, she woke and went to the kitchen to find Disarray calmly eating some breakfast.
“Nothing today?” asked Twilight. “I heard you mumbling about portals and thought you were going to use the crazy doors this morning”
Disarray smirked a little as Twilight poured herself a bowl of cereal. Since he stopped being her personal assistant she had to be more self sufficient. This meant cooking for herself, something Twilight was terrible at. The last time she tried to make oatmeal for herself it hardened into cement. The time before that it was so watery it was basically soup. The time before that she’d actually managed to burn the oatmeal. Needless to say, a bowl of cold cereal and maybe toast was the best she could manage on her own. At least she could make her own coffee.
“Nothing today sis. I’m going to have a very busy morning” replied the drake.
Twilight couldn’t help but give a smirk of her own “I was wondering why you were up so early. Since you stopped being my assistant you’ve really been sleeping in”
Disarray nodded and was about to respond but was cut off by a bright flash of blue.
“Princess Luna! What a pleasant surprise, what are you doing here?! Is something wrong?!” ask Twilight in a mild panic.
“Must something be the matter for me to want to visit? Am I not welcome otherwise?” asked Luna cooly.
“Wha-NO! You can come whenever you like! I didn’t mean to insinuate...I m-mean! I don’t want you to think...no! I-I mean….” stuttered Twilight, stumbling over her words.
Luna couldn’t hide a small chuckle that escaped her lips as she patted Twilight on the head. “Be at peace, I only jest. You can also stop with the ‘Princess’ thing. You are one too, and we are friends, you don’t need to call me such. However, to answer your question; in truth, I am here for Disarray”
“Me? Luna, if you’re upset about the salad prank, I already told you I’m not apologizing” the shadow drake said, finishing his breakfast.
“Oh no, I think back on those memories with great amusement. I will let you know, however, that those five lunar guard still walk funny” Luna replied, barely able to hide a giggle.
“No, I’m here on behalf of my sister” she added, gaining the attention of Twilight
“Princess Celestia? Why?” asked Twilight, concerned for her mentor.
“My sister is too prideful to ask this of you herself Disarray, but do you think you could give her some of your Candy of All Candies? She’d become rather obsessed with replicating it on her own as of late and to put it bluntly she’s gotten rather...bothersome” said Luna, giving an annoyed sigh every younger sibling could relate to.
Disarray had finished his breakfast and poofed into a black shirt and jeans “I’d love to but you’ll have to remind me later. I’m already late for some things I need to go, and then I have a meeting later that Maelstrom called. They seemed really excited now that they had employed six of us. Anywho, I got to go!”
The drake walked over to a nearly closet and opened the door, the sound of a roaring waterfall could be heard through the doorway as he hurried through, the door magically closing behind him.
“Wait! SIX?!” Twilight practically screamed, looking at the spot Disarray had been “Oh no…”
“So now you’re six versus six” smiled Luna “A full team versus a full team. If Maelstrom and the Masters of Mayhem hadn’t already shown themselves to be harmless fun pranksters, I’d be worried about Equestria’s future”
Twilight just shook her head.
“This can’t be happening. This can’t be happening. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?! Why would Maelstrom need six extra individuals to face us??? I mean, I understand Disarray to an extent, he a young impressionable dragon and he knows us very well, but why do they feel they need the other five?”
Luna sighed and sat at the table with Twilight.
“It’s because Maelstrom isn’t like Discord. They’re much much older and don’t share Discord’s weaknesses; mainly his desire to always do things solo. They understand where true strength comes from, while Discord did not. Think about it Twilight, Discord greatest flaw was that he didn’t understand the magic and power of friendship and that’s why friendship was the key element to defeating him since...well, always. Maelstrom isn’t like that though, they not only understand friendship, but see it as a tactical necessity; as having it takes away your greatest advantage over Chaos”
Twilight, in response, groaned and banged her head against the table.
“So what do we do Luna?! Even without the magic of friendship on our side, Chaos can’t be more powerful than Harmony!!”
“Honestly, young Twilight, I don’t see what the grand issue is. Remember, the Masters of Mayhem are harmless pranksters, and Maelstrom seems more interested in having fun than causing any real problems”
“But Team Chaos is just so unpredictable! If we could find out who the other members were, we might be able form some sort of countermeasures. They seem young, around Dissaray’s age, so maybe we could just tell their parents”
Luna shrugged “Then it would seem the most logical course of action would be to figure out who the other members are”
“But it’s not that simple!” cried Twilight “Disarray is extremely loyal to his teammates and wont tell us who they are!”
“You’ll very intelligent Twilight Sparkle, you’ll figure it out eventually. Ah, yes, speaking of intelligence, this is for you” Luna said, poofing a sealed envelope into Twilight’s hands. “The ESS requests an update on your...projects, details are in the letter”
Twilight nodded and opened the letter, reading over it’s contents before using her magic to levitate and burn it.
“Now, if you’ll excuse me” said Luna, yawning “It may be your morning, but it’s my bedtime, so I’ll bid thee farewell. Do try to have a nice day Twilight”
And with that, the lunar princess teleported away, leaving Twilight with her thoughts. She decided to use the note from the ESS, the Equestrian Secret Service, to distract her from the whole Disarray thing.
The ESS was an elite top secret military agency composed of thee most powerful and highly trained spies in all of Equestria. Where Team Harmony is sent out to deal with monsters, powerful evil villains, and world ending threats, the ESS is sent out to stop underground criminal syndicates, crime rings, and terrorist organizations; all without the public’s knowledge.
Twilight herself was part of that powerful organization; heading the weapons R&D division. When she ascended to an alicorn, Celestia gave her the option to quit and focus solely on leading Team Harmony, but Twilight kept her position; primarily because she knew she was the best, and because she loved it so much.
Wait! That’s it! With her status as a princess, she could now order ESS agents and assign missions! If anypony could figure out who the rest of the Master’s of Mayhem were it was the ESS. No, specifically, it was him! The greatest secret agent the ESS ever had! He was the absolute best of the best!
Calmly, Twilight went back to her bedroom, locking the door behind herself. Giving a small smile she went to her personal bookshelf filled with rare finds and first editions. Her horn sparked to life as she funneled magic into several of the books, the crystals embedded into the spines glowing brightly before the whole bookshelf moved to the side revealing a secret room.
The room was filled with all sorts of half completed contraptions, scrolls and blueprints, and various crystals. Twilight walked up to a large crystal slab hanging from the wall, her magic bringing it to life as a face began to become clear on its surface.
“Hello Agent Blueblood”
Celestria’s nephew, known to be the whiniest, snobbiest, most spoiled brat in all of Equestria, smiled at her.
“Ah, Princess Twilight, you received my letter, yes? Good, a situation has arose so I won’t be able to personally retrieve the shipments. Please deliver the new tech to my second in command as soon as you can”
“I received your letter, yes. Luna delivered it herself. Also, a situation?” questioned Twilight “Report”
Blueblood nodded “Our recent intelligence informs us that one of the leaders of the terrorist organization known as Salvation has been making some rather large ripples in the Equestrian underground. We think they’re up to something big. Worse still, some of the nobles are starting to suspect that I am hiding something. While such things are common among the nobility, it's still rather bothersom to have my name circulating around the rumor mill for all the wrong reasons. I fear they will be watching me like a well trained hawk. It’s nothing too dire, but I’d rather not risk anything. Besides, my second in command is more than capable of safely delivering the weapons without being noticed. It’s urgent we get that new crystal tech”
“Blue…” Twilight said with a nod “I’ll do my best, you know that, but I’m not one to sacrifice quality for speed. I’ll work on finishing the new tech in a timely manner, but I’m not cutting corners”
Blueblood smiled “That’s why your tech is the best”
Twilight couldn’t help but blush a little at that and return the smile. “In the meantime, there’s something I need you to do for me. You know I still view myself as an agent, just like all of you, but I need to use my royal position for the first time. I, Princess Twilight Sparkle, formally request the aid of the Secret Service”
The master spy nodded “Of course Your Majesty, your orders?”
Twilight took a deep breath and explained.
“Ok Agent Blueblood. As you know, my younger brother, Spike Draco Sparkle aka Disarray, has sided with the being known as Maelstrom, the new god of chaos that took over after Discord retired and left the planet”
Blueblood nodded “I have read about some of that in the newspapers, yes. You all managing to constantly fight them off and hold fast to Harmony is truly admirable”
“Thank you Agent Blue. My point is he isn’t working alone. As you know he has a team helping him. Together they have dubbed themselves the Masters of Mayhem. Your orders are this; I need you to find out who the other members are, and collect any intelligence you can on them to report back to me. While we know and trust Disarray, these new mysterious characters could prove major threats, and we must be ready with countermeasures. I am giving you clearance to mobilize the entire Ponyville division if you feel it necessary”
The spy prince had a sweat drop on his forehead.
“You...um...are aware that we are currently dealing with three major terrorist organizations, right?”
“I know Blueblood, but I really need this information. If these other members can’t be trusted, we could have a bigger problem on our hands. Especially so if it turns out any of the members are in league with these organizations. Besides, you said you suspect the other nobiles may be watching you. A few days vacation in Ponyville and they'll move on to the next latest bit of gossip. I don’t mean to pull rank, but this is an order from your princess”
Blueblood sighed.
“I’ll gear up and be on my way post haste”
Twilight smiled and nodded, ending communications.
Blueblood sat alone with his thoughts, holding his communication screen which was cleverly disguised as a hand mirror. He sighed. ‘Oh come on, we’re soldiers, spies, assassins, not the fucking Guardians of Harmony! This has nothing to do with us, fighting the forces of chaos is their arena ’ he thought to himself.
What to do, what to do. He firmly believed this was a waste of resources, but he couldn’t disobey a direct order from a princess. Wait! That’s it! He’ll have to go talk to both his and Twilight’s superior; Princess Celestia.
As always, he approached the throne room doors throwing a tantrum demanding for his auntie’s attention. He cut the line of noble already waiting for their turn to have an audience with the princess, he shoved the one that was already halfway through a boring speech out the throne room, and proceeded to whine and complain about how he was more important than any of them. Eventually Celestia gave a groan of annoyance, and ordered her guards to send everyone else away and leave them. Day court was done for the day so she could deal with her good for nothing nephew.
When they were finally alone, Celestia’s face softened and she smiled.
“Thanks for that Blueblood, I don’t know how much more of these nobles I could take”
“Oh auntie, I know exactly what you’re talking about.
They both shared a laugh before Celestia leaned in.
“So what’s the situation Agent Blueblood?”
“Leaving aside that we have enough evidence to start a formal investigation against both Fancy Pants and Spit Fire as two of the leaders of the terrorist organization Salvation, Twilight called me a little while ago and formally requested the help of the SS to find the identity of the Masters of Mayhem”
Celestia sighed and facepalmed “Seriously?...”
“Completely. So, how shall I proceed? Shall I listen or decline her? Your orders?”
Celestia remained silent for awhile before a small sly smile started to creep across her face.
“Well, Twilight is a princess now and that makes her your superior. I’m not going to undermine her authority by belaying her commands behind her back, so you are to proceed as she orders you to. However, whatever you find out, I am to receive a copy as well, understand? I expect a full report.
Blueblood saluted “As you wish, your agent obeys” he said before turning to leave.
“Oh, and before you leave...I have an extra mission for you as well Agent Blueblood” added Celestia. “Since you are going to most likely spy on Disarray and infiltrate his personal abode I require you to bring me a sample of his evil Candy of All Candies. It’s of the utmost importance that you complete this mission.
Blueblood raised a brow, but wisely decided not to say anything or ask to many questions. He was a soldier, a spy; he followed his orders, not questioned them.
With a final salute, he left to go back and get ready for his mission.
Back in ponyville, Disarray had been watching the newest member of the team. Rumble had been given the new name of Chimera. Like the others, his fur was dark grey, almost black. His eyes and slicked back mane were blue. He had two ram’s horns coming out of his head. Instead of the normal pony hooves, his were cloven. His oversized wings were both webbed and feathered simultaneously. Instead of hands, he had dragon claws. Instead of a normal pony’s tail, he had a long serpentine one. He wore patched up black shorts and a blue shirt with long oversized sleeves that were ripped at the shoulders and also covered in patchwork.
Chimera was currently squating down, listening to the whinings of a small green frog.
“No!...No way, are you serious?!.....She really did that?!.....mhm…..uh huh…..well that pony obviously deserves punishment!” he said, using his enhanced ability to talk to animals.
“You’re lucky you came across me. Don’t worry, Rum-I mean Chimera is here to help!”
“What’s the frog going on about?” asked Disarray curiously
“Diamond Tiara I think, she doesn’t know the pony’s name, but from the description I think it’s Diamond. That cruel mare found her hidey hole in the Rich’s garden pond and had a servant kick Froggy out of her beloved home. I mean, that pond had been there before the Rich’s even had their mansion built and Froggy’s family had been living in it for generations. Now in comes Diamond Tiara and just kicks her out, just like that. No, I can’t allow that to happen again! Not on my watch!”
Looking down at the small green frog, Chimera smiled “get ready”
Chimera took a deep breath and blew a blue mist over the frog, who instantly began to change. It grew and grew, its legs becoming comically big, it’s muscles swelling. For some strange reason it had a heart tattoo on one of its now muscular arms with the words MOM in the middle. The frog, now waist height to Chimera, kissed her muscular arms before jumping up to the Rich’s mansion door, kicking it open, and proceeding to hop right in. There was the sound of fighting, things breaking, and some minor screaming, but eventually Diamond Tiara came flying out of her open doorway, landing face first in the dirt. The frog then hopped out, landing on Diamonds head, and proceeded to hop away back to her pond.
Naturally, the two Master of Mayhem were on the ground laughing.
“You!” came a both loud but soft voice.
The two turned to spot Fluttershy storming over to them, Chimera specifically. She didn’t waste a second and instantly began hitting him with her Stare when she was close enough at full potency.
“I just saw what you did to that frog! You turned her into that...that…”
“I gave her the opportunity to get revenge on a pony that had been cruel to her!” said Chimera, hitting Fluttershy with his own Glare. “It’s my role to play in this world of chaos. I change animals and let them do what they want”
“I don’t care about your role to play, nothing gives you the right to use animals for your own twisted fun. It’s cruel, and mean, and...and…”
“And Hypocritical!” said Chimera, his Glare countering her Stare. “You’re supposed to be all about kindness, well, I’m doing something kind! I’m helping them get back at somepony that wronged them! What’s more kind than that?!”
Fluttershy just stuttered. The little bit of adrenaline she had built up from seeing an animal turned into a monster had worn off quick thanks to that Glare. She’d never had to deal with something like that before!
“B-But...I mean...um….” her voice cracked and got quieter and quieter.
Chimera took the opportunity to fly away with Disarray close behind.
“Well, that was interesting, so what are we doing now?” asked the shadow pony.
“Well, I was supposed to find you and bring to the HQ. Maelstrom called us for a meeting. I bet they’re all there waiting for us” replied the dark drake.
Chimera grinned and excited flew down into an alleyway, up to a random back door.
“Ooo allow me! I’ve been waiting to do this!” he said before swinging the door open and quickly going through.
Disarray followed through and closed the door behind himself. Looking around, he saw that they were in the regional office, aka, the cutiemark crusader treehouse.
“Well, seems no one’s here. We must be early or something” pondered Chimera out loud.
Disarray chuckled “This isn’t the HQ. This is just the regional office”
“It’s not?? No, I guess it wouldn’t be. It’d be way to obvious if you all were using the clubhouse as a headquarters. So where in the world is it???” asked Chimera.
The chaotic dragon just grinned and walked over to the door, opening it “it’s not” he said as he walked through. Chimera quickly followed, the door closing magically behind them.
Chimera couldn’t believe what he was seeing. There was so much cool stuff all around him and he had no idea what any of it did! Bad Seed and Party Pop were lounging on one of the couches, playing video games on one of the massive tvs. Maelstrom was reading a book while lounging in what appeared to be an extremely comfy chair. Hymnphonic was leaning against a jukebox, headphones plugged in, snapping her fingers to a beat only she could hear.
“Ah, so you two finally arrived” said Shadow Blitz, causing the boys to turn to look at her, then blush and look away due to what she was wearing. It was obvious she had just come from the HQ’s gym, as she was sweaty and only wearing athletic shorts and a sports bra. Chimera may have stared a bit more than he meant to.
“So, Welcome to the Headquarters of the Masters of Mayhem!” said Disarray, gesturing to the expanse of hallways, rooms, lounges, and the like, that surrounded them.
“This...this is incredible!” cried Chimera.
“Oh, you haven’t seen anything yet. But we’ll get you fully caught up with everything later, right now, I have an incredibly important news to give you all, so gather around” said Maelstrom.
Team Chaos quickly sat down in from of the chair Mael was in, giving the god their utmost attention.
“So, I’ve been thinking. You all have have been doing an absolutely amazing job. Like, spot on, flying colors, all lights green, bangup job. So I decided, today’s gonna be a Pay Day! Since you work for me, and not the corporation directly, I’m in charge of paying ya. So what’ll it be? Name it, anything you want, anything at all!”
They all just stared at Mael wide eyed.
“Wait, we get paid?!” asked Pop.
“Yea, it IS a job after all” replied Disarray.
Mael nodded and smiled “So name it, anything you want, and it’s yours. Within reason of course, I’m not giving you your own planet. At least, not yet”
Hymn took some time to think about it before replying.
“I would….hmmmm….I would like a Total Knockout makeup set, the deluxe edition with all the extra brushes. I want to get better at makeup for...um….reasons….
“HA! Lame!” laughed Shadow “I want tickets...no...Season passes to go see the Shadowbolts! They’ve been completely dominating the Wonderbolts in nearly every show they perform. They’re going to be performing in Canterlot soon and I really want to see the show!”
Party Pop thought for a moment, before giving a huge grin “Ooo! Ooo! I want a new sound system! Speakers! Reaaaaaaaalllllly BIG ones!”
“Do I get paid? I just started….” asked Chimera
Mael smiled “everyone’s getting paid, you know what you want?”
Chimera nodded “I want some new toys for Devil Bunny!”
“WAIT!!”
“Hm? What’s wrong Seed? Can’t think of something you want?” asked Disarray.
“No, it’s not that. Just, everypony, think a little, okay?” If we suddenly just appear with all this new stuff we didn’t have before, our families are going to know something is up and wonder where we got it all. Our siblings may act dense a lot of the time, but they’re not idiots. They’ll begin to suspect something was up and before we know it, boom, they know we’re the masters of mayhem. I don’t know about you guys but I’m still not ready to cross that bridge.”
They all sighed. Bad Seed what right.
“So then what?...” asked Hymn
There was long pause of silence before Chimera spoke up.
“Oh! I know! We can go on vacation to a reaaallly nice place! During the Crazy Doors Incident my family and I ended up on a very crazy cool beach where they had this super luxurious beach resort and spa. I’m talking the whole package! We couldn’t afford to actually stay there at the resort, but it looked really cool. I really want to be able to go there...um...Royal Ponmerion I think it’s called. It’s great and the weather is perfect, so let’s just go there!”
The others looked at each other, big smiles growing on their face.
“That's an excellent idea Chimera!” praised Maelstrom “I’ll make the reservations and we’ll all go this weekend!”
Bad Seed just sighed “we still kinda have the same problem. Our families are going to notice if we suddenly disappear for a whole weekend”
“oh yea…” said Chimera, before giving a sly smirk and a wink “What if they never notice we’re gone? Boss, you got near unlimited chaos power right?”
“Yes?” replied Maelstrom
“So you can whip us up some replica’s right? Could make them all sick so that they spend the weekend in bed. No one will be the wiser!”
Mael grinned “Chimera, you are just too clever. I’m so glad you joined the team”
Seed nodded “That is a clever plan, and I can’t see it not working”
“And it solves more than just that one problem. People will see us in our chaos forms, but our families will think you all are sick in bed. Stories will spread of Team Chaos on vacation. I think Twilight is starting to suspect who you all are, she’s really been hounding me to tell her you all’s identities and you know how Twilight gets when there’s something she wants to know. If you all are in two places at once, your siblings will be able to verify you are in bed and she’ll be able to verify we were all on vacation, the scent goes cold” added Disarray.
“You got a real talent for this Chimera” said Shadow
Chimera just shrugged and blushed a little.
With that, the meeting was concluded and everyone went back to doing what they wanted to, with Mael explaining the Company, Mr Boss, the Departments, and of course The Headquarters to Chimera.
In Canterlot, Luna was relaxing in the royal spa. Hot springs were a wonderful thing.
“Lulu!” called out Celestia as she entered, having nothing on but a towel, which she quickly discarded as she slipped into the wonderfully hot water and found a comfortable spot next to her sister. “Lulu, you won’t guess what Twilight just did!” she said.
“Hmm? What did she do? Did she use her authority to call in the secret service to investigate the Masters of Mayhem?” chuckled Luna softly.
Celestia froze in surprise, looking over at her sister
“Yes, that’s exactly it. How’d you know?”
“Well, I may have had a hand in instigating the idea in her head. I have a few suspicions, but I need Blueblood to confirm them”
The solar princess nodded and slid further down into the water “Well, I’m having him send a copy of his findings to me, so I’ll let you know when I get his report”
Luna just nodded with a tiny sly smirk and slid further down into the water herself.
“Wait, Lulu, what kind of suspicions were you talking about?”
“Relaxing first, conspiracies later”
The rest of the week passed by very quickly, with Chimera still excited about his new powers and helping animals get their revenge. He was limited to ponyville at first, but when he was taught how to open crazy doors he soon began causing havoc all across Equestria. Animals rose up and revolted and pets enacted their revenge against their owners.
Of course the rest of Team Harmony were informed of this new player, much to their chagrin. Things were looking bad for them now, now that they had to go up against a full team. This wasn’t going to be easy and Twilight was convinced they were up to something big. Her and the girls were constantly going all around Equestria solving animals problems.
The weekend had finally arrived and Disarray was just locking his bedroom door when Twilight came marching up.
“Oh, hey sis. What’s up?” he asked.
“Oh don’t what’s up me! Do you know what that new little friend of yours did?! He and that Bad Seed mutated some animals and crops by Baltimare! It was a full out war between bunnies and carrots when we got there Disarray. A WAR! So I’ve tried being patient, and respect your loyalty to your friends. But you need to tell me who they are!” the purple princess said, stomping her hoof for emphasis.
Disarray shrugged. “Well, it’s really not my place to say. Good to hear the new guy is doing such a good job. I’ll have to relay that to the boss. Anywho, I’ll be gone all weekend, so hold down the fort.”
“That’s another thing! Why do you hold that Maelstrom in such high regard?! Also...wait, what did you say? Gone? Why?” asked Twilight
“Oh, didn’t I tell you? The whole team is going on vacation” replied Disarray cooly
“VACATION?!” screamed Twilight
“Yea, we think we’ve earned one. It’s at this super high end luxury resort too, gonna be a total blast! Anyways, see you Twilight. Hope you don’t get too bored without us” and in a puff of purple flame, he was gone.
Twilight just stood there. Vacation. They were going on a luxury vacation, because they earned it?! If anything, SHE earned one! Her and the girls have been having to deal with their crap for months now and THEY get to go on a vacation?! She’ll have to remember to send a strongly worded letter to Princess Celestia about this.
However, another more pressing thought entered her head. If Disarray was going to be gone the whole weekend, that means she’d be in the clear to do...that. She’d given him one last chance to tell her who the other Masters of Mayhem were. He refused, so now it was time to do it the hard way. Blueblood had gotten into town a couple days ago and was laying low waiting for her signal. Now was the perfect time, she’ll call in Blueblood and the SS will break into Disarray's bedroom and see if they can find not only the information she seeks, but anything about Team Chaos’ future plans. She powered up her horn and ignited the crystal in an unsuspecting ring she was wearing.
Across Ponyville, at the town’s hotel, a ring around the finger of Equestria’s top spy, Special Agent Blueblood, flashed purple three times before turning green. Blueblood sighed and pulled out his hand mirror, the face of his second in command on its surface.
“I just received the signal, the operation is a go. All assigned units are to report in. I want to wrap this up and finish this as soon as possible”
View Online
Chapter 8 - Operation Dragon Horde is GO! Part 1
Blueblood quickly ducked down an alley and, using a special grappling hook, pulled himself up onto a nearby roof. Down bellow a trio of angry mares stopped and looked around confused.
“I know I saw that spoiled lout go this way!” said Roseluck.
“Maybe he doubled back somehow?” asked Daisy.
The trio looks around for a few more seconds before turning and going back the way they came. Blueblood gave a sigh of relief. He had received a few unpleasant encounters in this town, but none were as extreme as those three.
The first was of course with Ms Rarity Belle. Blueblood had originally gone to her shop to apologize for that unfortunate night at the gala, but before he could get a single word out she was already yelling at him and pushing him out her store. What followed was a few days of laying low and receiving the odd glare when ponies thought he hadn’t noticed them. It made sense that Rarity would be held in such esteem here. She was, after all, a hero of equestria. It was also no surprise that tales of his atrocious behaviour towards said hero would circulate the rumor mill in such a small town. Especially since Rarity was the gossipy type.
Now just to be clear, ponies not liking him was something he could handle. After all, his cover was that of a spoiled self-entitled brat. Ponies not liking you was just part of the job. No, what was causing him a migraine was that particular trio of ponies, Rarity’s more...eh…’enthusiastic’ supporters, constantly chasing him around Ponyville. What they were going to do to him if they caught him, he’d never find out.
Blueblood looked out from his hidden rooftop perch and sighed.
Truthfully that night wasn’t even fully his fault. He had just confused Rarity with a high priority target he was supposed to be getting close to, to see if he could gleam information from them. When he realized his mistake, he tried to make her leave by acting like a jerk.
So here he was, sitting on a rooftop to hide from three crazy mares, organizing a full scale operation for Princess Twilight. A mission he felt was a complete waste of time. At the least, he didn’t need to be there personally. There were four agents who already lived here in Ponyville! Twilight may have been his best friend’s little sister, but she could truly be exasperating sometimes.
“Hey! Boss! What’s up? Besides you, of course, HA!” called a mint-green unicorn with yellow eyes.
“Is the area clear?” Blueblood called back.
The mare looks around before looking back up and nodding. Blue smirked and parkoured down to the ground in front of her.
“Whew, that a relief. Special Agent Heartstrings, it’s good to see you. How have you been?” Blueblood asked with a genuine smile.
“Pretty cool, thanks” replied Lyra “I wanted to talk to you again about the whole keeping secrets from my marefriend thing. I just...I want to tell her the truth about me. She used to work for the MHE, so that has to count for something, right?”
Blueblood sighed “Lyra, we’ve discussed this before. I cannot approve that unless either you two get married or she joins the ESS. She’s already turned down the proposal twice”
“That's because she just wants to protect me! She won’t take a job like this, thinking her work would put me in danger! If you let me tell her the truth, I know she’d join then!”
“You know it doesn’t work that way Lyra, we have protocols. Either she joins, or you put a ring on it and maybe I’ll be able to stretch a few of the rules”
It was Lyra’s turn to sigh now “Yea yea….whatever. Anyway, the rest of the team is here!”
Agent Blueblood turned around and smiled. Walking up the alley was Special Agent Octavia Melody and Special Agent Fancy Vanille; or as she liked to go by, Vinyl Scratch. Coming up behind them was Blueblood’s second in command, and most trusted agent, Special Agent Derpy Hooves.
“First things first” said Derpy, taking a small crystal out of her pocket and tossing it on the ground between them all. The crystal glowed and emitted a small forcefield around the group of spies. If anyone where to look down the alleyway, it would look completely barren.
“Let’s get this over with as soon as possible. We all have more important things to do. What have you found out so far?” asked Blueblood
Octavia pulled out a folder and handed it over to their leader, inside were papers full of information, and several pictures.
“The stallion, if that’s what you want to call him, seems to go by the alias ‘Chimera’ and is both the newest and currently most active member of Team Chaos”
Lyra pointed to a few of the papers as Blueblood read over them, speaking up.
“From our intell, it seems each of the Masters of Mayhem are rivals to the members of Team Harmony in more than just name. Each one is not only tailored to go hoof to hoof with them, but is very similar in natural talents. Case in point number one; Chimera. He is the Element of Kindness’ rival. Similar to her, he has shown the ability to talk to animals, however, he has also demonstrated the ability to warp them into mutants and monsters” she said, pulling out a few more photos “we’ve chronicled a few, but it seems there’s no actual patterns or limitations to the transformations, just chaotic randomness”
Octavia spoke back up “And that’s not all, Chimera has demonstrated the ability to warp any part of his body into that of any known and some unknown creatures, even going so far as to become the creature entirely”
Blueblood just stood silent, reading over the files and listening to the reports. He could somewhat understand Twilight’s concern now. When you started to understand them and what they could do, the threat that Team Chaos presented was nothing to brush aside. Sure everypony saw the Masters of Mayhem as bearers of fun at best and pests at worst, but if they were to go truly evil they could really wreck some havoc.
Vinyl handed over a couple more folders.
“The red eyed one goes by the alias Bad Seed, she appears to have complete control over all plant life. She can make seemingly any and all plantlife to grow where no plant should be able to grow, and seemingly is able to give them some kind of mild sentience. However, that’s not the interesting bit. What’s interesting are these things she creates that we’ve dubbed ‘Apples of Anarchy’. Said apple-like fruits have a solid black exterior and purple interior. Their taste is completely random, as are the effects if you eat them. The Effects only last four hours if you eat only one bite, but is halved if you eat the whole apple. We don’t understand why” she explained, moving on to the next file.
“The pink eyed one is known as Shadow Blitz. She is currently documented as the fastest flying thing we have on record, ever”
That got Blueblood’s attention “Faster than Rainbow Dash? Has she replicated the Sonic Rainboom?”
Vinyl nodded “The Element of Loyalty’s top recorded speed is mach two point six. If our instruments are correct, Shadow Blitz has a cruising speed, on average, mach five point three. She pulls off a move dubbed “The Sonic Shadowboom” that produces a grayscale sonic boom. But that's not all sir. She has demonstrated the ability to control the weather and change it in ways that defy all logic and reason”
“Yes, I’m reading the report now. Hailing hayburgers, bubblegum clouds...raining grape juice. Remind me to invite her to the next company cookout ha!” joked Blueblood, though he was giving these reports a serious looking over.
Truthfully he had never before given Team Chaos much thought. He was constantly busy with what he considered more important work, and Team Harmony always seemed to take care of things with a firm handle on any problem Chaos could come up with. If he were being honest, he considered the actions of Team Chaos to be akin to foalish games, more immature than threatening. However the more he read, the more worried he became. The more he looked over, the more he started to understand Twilight’s concerns. These beings had the potential to wreck all of Equestria if they wanted to. The destructive power in just one of them was mind blowing.
Octavia handed over another file and began to speak.
“Next we have the green eyed one who identifies as Hymnphonic. Her powers are very simple. She has the magic levels of an Sigma class unicorn, and seems to be getting stronger with every confrontation between the two teams. She can cast very complex spells some mages spend decades trying to master. But that isn’t the scariest part”
Blueblood had to ask “what’s the scariest part about this mare?”
“Her voice. It has hypnotic properties that can force ponies to not only do whatever she wants them to do, but also get them to generally WANT to do it. Victims of her hypnosis say they didn’t really feel any real desire to fight against it. At this time, we have no idea of the full scale of her power level. We don’t know how many people she can control at once, the range and carry her voice has, or even the complexity of the commands she can give. All we know for certain is that as long as you can hear her voice, she can hypnotize you”
Blueblood nodded, Hynphonic could definitely be a threat. He opened the next file, only to raise a brow at the empty folder. Well, it was empty save for one picture. Of a black mare with yellow eyes and hair, giving a huge grin and waving at the camera enthusiastically. Something about the mare felt really...off…
“And….this one?” he asked.
The other agents all just shivered before Derpy spoke up “Mare goes by the name of Party Pop. We...can’t figure out what the full extent of her powers are, all we could discern is that she’s supposed to be the chaotic version of the Element of Laughter, Pinkie Pie”
Now it was Blueblood’s turn to shiver, he quickly closed the the file and opened the final file, which was one of the largest.
“Disarray, also known as Spike Draco Sparkle, Princess Twilight Sparkle’s adopted younger brother, dragon, age eighteen, male. He has demonstrated master level tactician skills, master level problem solving skills, and has a knack for imagination and creativity. He seems to have an in depth knowledge of the inner workings of magic and according to our scanners his power output levels are on par with, if not greater than, that of Princess Twilight herself. That makes sense, considering he’s Twilight’s rival and most likely has undergone magical alterations to be able to compete with her on her level. Like how a unicorn channels magic through their horn, Disarray seems to channel it through his fire breath, unleashing blasts of flame that can warp reality itself. We aren’t sure to what extent he could warp it and it seems it can only be fixed with a harmony wave”
Blueblood nodded, closing the file and sighing. He was a fool for thinking this mission was a waste of time. They should have had files open on Team Chaos since day one. Speaking of…
“What about their leader, the blue three eyed being?”
“Yes, the being goes by the name Maelstrom. They are the current acting god of chaos, since Discord ‘retired’...we are still unsure if that is literal or code for something more sinister. Either way, we have no data on Maelstrom. All we can do is logically assume that if Team Chaos is willing to follow them, they must be some kind of next level powerful” replied Lyra.
Well, that was troubling, however something else caught his attention.
“I noticed the only actual name you had on here was Disarray’s. Could none of you figure out the names of the other members of Team Chaos?”
The other agents looked everywhere but at Blueblood. Finally Derpy spoke up.
“We tried our best boss. But they just didn’t slip out. We thought were on to something with Party Pop, but then she just turned and waved directly at the camera like she knew it was there all along. We had thought we had been compromised”
Nodding understandingly, Blueblood paced a little as he thought to himself.
There was no real need for panic, because there’s a high chance Team Chaos doesn’t know the ESS even exists, and it would be towards their benefit to keep it that way. Yes, staying in the shadows was the best thing to do. Still, it seems they were going to have to move on to phase two. He was hoping this would have all the info he needed and could then go home, but no, it was never that easy.
“With all of that out the way, the second phase of the operation is a go. I’ll head to the castle to meet with Agent Sparkle, in the meantime all units are to continue treat this as a priority C level mission; I want to finish this as quickly as possible.”
Derpy nodded before turning to the others “You heard him, Observe and record only, we continue collecting information”
With a nod, all the spies saluted each other and left without a trace. Blueblood sighed as he stealthily made his way to the Castle of Friendship. This was going to be a long weekend he thought to himself.
Meanwhile at the Hotel Royal Ponimeron:
Team Chaos had appeared in a purple and golden flash in front of the famous resort. Grinning at each other, the team made their way up the front door, their luggage magically floating behind them.
“Vacation, here we come! All play, all relaxation, and no pesky agents of harmony to ruin our fun!” exclaimed Maelstrom, stretching out their four arms.
“This is going to be great!” agreed Disarray, admiring the class and architecture of the huge lobby they stepped into.
“And the best part is, we can be in our natural chaotic forms here, no need to hide or be on the lookout for this or that!” said Party Pop excitedly.
“Natural form?” questioned Chimera
Hymn nodded and spoke up “Doesn’t your chaotic form feel more natural to you than your old pony form? It feels that way for me. When I have to take my old form around my sister, it feels like I’m just wearing a mask, like it’s not who I truly am”
Chimera slowly nodded “Yea...I get it, I’ve always kinda felt that way around my family, now even more so”
"Hey! Hey! Enough with the deep depressing stuff, it’s vacation time!” chimed in Bad Seed.
With that settled the team continued up to the front desk to check in, but stopped when they heard two familiar voices.
“Stop complaining Diamond, this is just what we needed; a nice long weekend away from those blank flank losers. Think about it, our bad luck started when we began following them around. Let’s just relax and not think about them for a few days”
“Yea, I guess you’re right Silver...I won’t let them bother me anymore! It’ll just be us, relaxing and forgetting about everything. HA! I bet those three dream about coming to a place as expensive as this. It’s a shame this place is so exclusive only the truly elite even know of it. I’d love to rub it in their faces”
Both mares shared a laugh.
“That’s the spirit Diamond, but let’s not even talk about them” said Silver Spoon “It’ll just bring on more bad luck, this weekend, it’s just about us”
Silver then wrapped her arms around Diamond, and pulled her in for a quick kiss. Diamond's eyes widened in surprise, but then softened as she returned the gesture, kissing back.
“Yes. Just about us”
At that point a small cough was heard and the two mares turned, blushing slightly, to a nearby stalion wearing a butler’s uniform “Miss Diamond, Miss Silver, I have precured your membership identification” he said, holding out two silk bracelets, both encrusted with emeralds.
“All Inclusive package, right Silver Platter? That’s what daddy said he got us” Diamond asked, taking the bracelet and putting it on. It would show their status among the elite around the resort and allow them to pretty much do whatever they wanted.
“Of course, Ma’am. Only the best for you two” Silver Platter answered with a smile. “You have free reign of the resort, with the exception of the royalty wing for obvious reasons. I have already sent your luggage to your room. I shall be at your beck and call should you require anything. Might I be so bold as to say, Miss Diamond, it is so good to see you smiling again”
“You are such a good butler, I don’t tell you that enough” said Diamond, looking over at Silver spoon with a small smile on her face, reaching over and grabbing her marefriend’s hand “And well; not a dork in sight, my mare beside me, at a high class resort for the whole weekend? I have a lot to smile about” she said, pulling Silver away to their room to unpack their stuff and figure out what they were going to do first.
Silver Spoon giggled as she followed behind her mare and looked back at Silver Platter, mouthing “Thank you dad, love you.” The stallion just grinning and giving a professional bow as he turned and made his way to his own room over in the servants’ wing.
Team Chaos has been watching the whole thing unfold with their mouths literally on the floor. One by one they picked up their dislocated jaws, looking at each other pondering what they just saw.
“Well….that was….um….interesting…” said Disarray slowly
“Who knew those two were dating…....kind of obvious though when you think about it…….” added Hymnphonic.
“Or that Silver Spoon’s dad was Diamond Tiara’s personal butler” chimed in Party Pop.
“I’m just glad they didn’t notice us..” Chimera said with a sign of releif
“Enough pondering about them, let’s just get checked in” said Mael, floating over to the receptionist’s desk.
The mare behind the counter was shocked, seeing the gods of chaos standing before her, but she managed to keep her sense of professionalism. “Ah, welcome to The Royal Ponimerion, how might I be of service on this perfect day?”
Maelstrom raised a brow at the lack of a reaction and smirked a little. Ok, this mare earned herself a tip. “Maelstrom and the Master of Mayhem checking in”
The mare, whose name tag said ‘Prim Rose’, pulled out a red book and looked through it, frowning before glancing up at the deity “I’m sorry, I don’t see you on the booking ledger…”
Mael just raised a brow, causing the mare to sweat a little “Of course, guests as esteemed as yourselves would have an all inclusive stay, not a simple regular booking for common elites!” she nervously said, pulling out an emerald green book and looked through it, frowning again when she couldn’t find what she was looking for.
The rest of the team were to busy talking amongst themselves about what they had just learned about Diamond and Silver to notice the exchange. Maelstrom sighed and leaned over the counter, all three eyes trained on the mare who was now profusely sweating. Other staff at the counter had noticed the group and Prim Rose, who looked like a deer in the headlights. All of them felt bad for the her. None of them moved an inch to help her.
Prim Rose looked into the golden eyes of Maelstrom; they seemed to bore through her, into her very essence, her very soul.
“This is the Royal Ponimeron, one of the most exclusive, high end, luxury resorts on Equis is it not?” asked Maelstrom.
“yes…” squeaked the mare.
“And you recognize me, correct?”
“y-yes”
“Who am I?”
“Th-the new god of chaos...Maelstrom….”
Maelstrom nodded and then focused their eyes back on Prim Rose.
“That’s right, a god. So, you checked the regular ledger, and then you checked the luxury ledger. But what you should have checked, what you should have reached for first, what you should have had at the ready...was the Royalty ledger.”
The mare just stared, slightly slack jawed “B-but, that ledger is for royalty and-”
“And a god is lesser than a royal? Check the ledger and I believe you shall find my name and booking for myself and the Masters of Mayhem. There should also be some identification bracelets already made up for us” There goes her tip.
With no hesitation, the mare opened a safe under the desk and pulled out a golden book. The pages seemed to have been made of leaflets of pure silver. The mare opened the book and looked to the last pages for newer entries.
There is was, etched into the silver, the names of Maelstrom and each of the Masters of Mayhem. Maelstrom just smiled as the mare stared dumbly at the page.
Within a second, she had put on her smile and mask of professionalism “I’m so sorry for the inconvenience and delay, your royal suite is all ready for you and the servants will take care of your luggage. Please, if there is anything you need, never hesitate to ask” she said, pulling seven small ornate boxes out and handed them over to Maelstrom who just floated them into the air. With a final smirk the deity turned away from the desk and back to their team. The receptionist just let loose a sigh of relief.
“Ok gang, gather around, you need your membership bracelets” Mael said, handing each team member a box.
“Yea, Diamond had one, what’s up with those?” asked Shadow
“A very good question. Well, turns out this place isn’t just some luxury resort, it’s THEE luxury resort, rather hush hush. It’s mainly a place where the nobility, royalty, and super elite of the world can come and not be bothered with the common folk. Well, they need a way to identify if you’re a member without giving away the resort and obviously membership cards won’t work for a place you want to keep secret so…”
“So they use jewelry instead. A common pony or whomever wouldn’t think twice about seeing some rich person walking around with jewelry on!” said Disarray, wide eyed.
“Right, the different materials used, the type of encrusted gems, even the patterns, help identify you as not only someone in the know, but your standing amongst the elites”
The team opened their boxed, putting on their bracelets. Said bracelets were a mixture of gold and silver, encrusted with both diamonds and emeralds in an ornate pattern.
“So what does this mean?” asked Bad Seed.
Maelstrom started to answer, but was cut off as a nearby mare cleared her throat. Said mare, a pegasus, was timidly looking at each of them as her hands fiddled with her maid outfit.
“Greetings, I’m Feather Duster, I’ll be one of your servants for the duration of your stay here at the Royal Ponimarion, If you’ll follow me, I’ll escort you to your suite in the royal wing.”
The group smiled and followed Feather Duster as Maelstrom spoke up “To answer your question, before I was so rudely interrupted..” Feather Duster flinched “Our bracelets identify us as royalty. Think of it as a lifetime all expenses paid completely and truly all inclusive package”
“Woah, how much does something like that even cost?!” asked Chimera.
“It’s not about just money. Just having money isn't enough to buy this. It’s about power, influence, and status. We’re gods, that puts us on the same level, if not higher, than royalty. This weekend, we’re going to be pampered as such.”
Feather Duster wisely chose to stay silent and wait till Maelstrom finished their explanation before opening the double doors in front of them and speaking up “Masters, Mistresses, your suite. Should you require anything, we are your humble servants at your beck and call” she said, walking over to a nearby servant’s door and going through.
The team just stared. Suite? This was no suite. It was a mini palace. Mael just grinning “It’ll do”
At the Castle of Friendship:
Agent Blueblood stood in the main foyer of the palace as Twilight closed the doors behind him, placing a charm on them to alert her if anypony, or dragon, tries to enter the castle.
“I’m glad you came Blue, tell me, what do you know so far” asked Twilight, an expectant yet worried look on her face.
“Let me start by apologizing. I had thought this whole assignment would be a waste of ESS resources, but what my team has uncovered changed my view of the threat level of the Masters of Mayhem. We weren’t able to obtain their true identities, but we have chronicled their powers, and I do believe that they may pose a significant threat to Equestria’s safety. So I apologize for doubting your reasoning Twilight”
The purple princess smiled “No apology necessary Blue, I’m just glad somepony else understands the gravity of the situation. I would love to see the data you’ve collected on their powers, I myself have been trying to collect data on the full extent of their abilities, but right now we need to focus on figuring out their identities and plans”
Blueblood nodded “To Disarray's room then?” he said, making a mental note to compare notes with Twilight.
“Yes, follow me and stay close, Disarray left some boobytrap pranks around” replied Twilight, leading the way through the castle.
As the two navigated their way, Blueblood remembered something important he needed to talk to Twilight about “Twilight, could I receive an update on that new equipment I had requested?”
Twilight nodded “It’s pretty much done. Just finishing up some final testing, looking for any bugs, you should have it before mid week. But right now we need to concentrate on the mission at hand, this is the most dangerous part”
Blue nodded as they reached Disarray’s room. Twilight immediately began scanning the door for traps. As soon as her magic touched the door, the two were blasted from seemingly nowhere with gallons of honey followed by a bath of feathers covering them completely and for the grand finale the floor become slippery with oil and the two ended up sliding down the hall, down a flight of stairs, and right out the front door.
Blueblood just layed their, sighing “so about that equipment…”
Twilight sat up, staring angrily at the castle “Fine, Disarray wins this round, I’ll get cleaned up and get it finished, give me an hour or two”
At the Royal Ponimeron’s indoor pool (not to be confused with their outdoor one):
“Girls, Girls! Check this out!” called Party Pop from the top of the largest diving board at the pool. “This is something I’ve always wanted to try; get ready!” She said, bouncing higher and higher, almost comically so. A life guard had noticed the mare and was currently climbing the ladder to stop her from hurting herself.
Down on the ground however, her friends cheered her on.
“Show us what you can do!” called out Disarray.
“You can do it! You got this!” cheered Chimera.
Maelstrom and Hymnphonic were lounging on pool chairs. Hymn looked up and smiled “This has the opportunity to be quite the epic moment” she added.
“Show em you’re a true apple!” cheered Bad Seed
“This is going to be good…” commented Mael
“Pop! Pop! Pop! Pop!” chanted Shadow Blitz
The lifeguard had made it about halfway up the ladder when Pop jumped extra comically high, did several flips and proceeded to fall in what appeared to be the position for a belly flop. To any onlooker it looks like she was about to either knock herself out, fracture her ribs, or at the least be in some serious pain. All watching cringed to various degree as she neared the water...only to slow down to a near stop, suspended in air for a few seconds, long enough for the lifeguard to mutter “that the hay” before Party Pop gently plinked into the water without so much as a ripple.
The rest of the team burst out laughing, congratulating Pop as she climbed out of the pool and bowed.
“That was one of Pinkie’s moves, right?” asked Chimera.
“Yup! It’s a shame she isn’t here to see me, but I’ll have my chance to show her what I can do. It’s so much fun having these powers.”
“That it is Pop, that it is” chuckled Mael.
From the other side of pool, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon looked on at the scene with a stare of mild confusion, anger, and reprove. Who let these uncultured disruptive idiots into their paradise?!
“Such manners…” sighed Silver.
“They’re as noisy as those blank flanks! You’d think gods would have a bit more class!” complained Diamond with a ‘hmph!’
Silver spoon sighed again as Silver Platter brought them both over another drink. She looked over at the group of dark ponies and suddenly noticed something.
“Wait a second! Diamond look! Isn’t that...what’s his name...Rumble?”
“Huh? Rumble who? Or yea, that loser I gave the camera to. What in the world would he being doing here? Are you sure?”
Silver nodded “Yea! I saw it, he changed from that weird creature, into Rumble, and then one of the mares said something to him, and he glanced around and turned back into that creature! And now that I’m looking over there more, it seems the whole team is here. Look, there’s that dragon over there with them. It’s that same dragon that was always around Princess Twilight, the one that joined the Masters of Mayhem? Over there! Look! There’s that new god of chaos too, lounging on one of the pool chairs!”
Diamond looked closer and nodded, yup there was that dragon. Disarray, she thinks he calls himself now. Also, yes, there was the new god of chaos. Turning, she looked over at the blue haired dark stallion. That mixed matched thing was Rumble? How? When?
“Why would that be Rumble though, the last time we saw him, we told him to follow the blank flanks around…” said Diamond, pondering out loud “And why would he be with that dragon…”
“I heard the dragon doesn’t even work for Princess Twilight anymore, as soon as he joined up with Chaos, he was fired. At least, that’s what I overheard Miss Rarity talking to Roseluck about” added Silver
Diamond was deep in through, trying to put all the pieces together. Rumble was sent to follow the blank flanks, and somehow is now a Master of Mayhem. Spike joins Maelstrom, turns into Disarray, gets a new form. Where’s the connection?
Suddenly, her eyes got wide “No….NO WAY!”
“What!? What is it??” asked Silver
“That dragon, Disarray, joins chaos. Then that nightmare night with that evil candy happens. Remember back then?”
“Ugh, don’t remind me, I can’t even enjoy my favorite cocktails anymore, have to settle for dryer drinks” groaned Silver
“No, but think! Back then, he had three mares helping him! An earth pony, a unicorn, and a pegasus! Yea they may look different, but what other trio matching that do we know?”
Silver thought for a moment before going wide eyed herself “No….there’s no way…”
Diamond’s brain was whirling “If the dragon gets a new form, and Rumble got a new form...wouldn't those loosers also get a new form? After that Nightmare Night, those three were part of a handful of ponies not affected by that candy. If they were the one’s giving it out, then of course they wouldn’t eat any! And I said it back then, remember? They were acting weirder than normal, like they were up to something! And that dragon worked for the princess, who’s friends with their sisters, of course he’d know them! It all just makes too much sense!”
Silver nodded slowly, still wide eyed, looking across the pool at the playing group “but...that still doesn’t explain Rumble, or that other mare….unless…”
“Unless they recruited Rumble, another blank flank, into their weirdo club when we sent him to watch them. We should have done it ourselves, there was no way a blank flank wasn’t going to mess that simple task up! As for that other mare, it could be...who was it, that one mare that was related to Applebloom?”
The both sat in silence and thought before turning to each other “Babs!” they said in unison “That little traiter” Diamond added.
“Holy Celestia, this makes way to much sense. If we’re right...their sister’s are going to kill them! We’re going to need proof though” Silver said, looking over to Diamond with a dark grin
“Well get our proof. We’ll expose them and it’ll be their end…” replied Diamond as she looks over at Silver with the same dark grin “But first…” she added, pulling her mare in for a kiss.
Unaware of the ‘danger’ they were in, Team Chaos dried themselves off and made their way out of the pool area, walking through the hallways just enjoying themselves.
“Hey Look, they have a nightclub here!” said Hymnphonic, noticing the framed poster on the wall.
“REALLY?!” Pop practically screamed. “We’re going right?! We’re so totally going!!”
Bad Seed shrugged and smiled “Seemed like a fun idea”
“Perfect way to end the first night of our vacation” agreed Disarray.
Before they could contemplate the night any further, their were interrupted by both Shadow Blitz and Disarry’s growling stomachs.
“Lets head back to our suite and order some food first” suggest Mael with a chuckle.
“Shouldn’t we go to the dining hall?” asked Seed.
“There are no dining halls here, only various restaurants. We’ll visit those in time, but we have some of the finest room service at our disposal, it would be a waste not to use it.
With a grin, the team turned to head back to their room, all thinking of the yummy things they’d order. All except one. Hymn reached out and grabbed Disarray’s arm, the drake turning and raising a brow.
“Hey...um...tonight, I was wondering if you’d like to, you know, dance with me?” she asked, blushing, thankful her dark grey fur hid it.
Disarray smiled.
“Of course Hymn, it’ll be fun”
Hymn smiled back and both of them went to catch up with the others.
Unbenounst to the two, they were being followed.
Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon walked down the hallway, quiet enough not to draw attention to themselves, but without any real fear or care. After all, they had all inclussive memberships, there wasn't anywhere they couldn't go. They were going to find out which room the Master of Mayhem were staying in, and then spy on them. It seemed like a good plan, until they were stopped by a pegasus.
"What the...move out the way servant!" Diamond almost growled.
"I-I'm afraid I can't do that. This area is off limits" responded Feather Duster
"Off limits?? Off Limits?! Do you see this?" said Diamond, holding up her wrist to show her bracelet "This means I'm a Luxury member, this means I can go wherever I want! Now move!"
Feather Duster squeeked a little at the agressive mare in front of her but held her ground. Silver Spoon decided to take a cooler approach.
"As you can see, you can't stop us. We were just trying to meet up with some of our friends who we just saw enter this way. The Blank Flan-I mean, Masters of Mayhem, perhaps you've heard of them?" she asked calmly.
Feather just shook her head "You are friends with th-the M-Masters of Mayhem?! I'm terribly sorry!" stuttered Feather.
"Well, you had better be bu-" Silver had begun to say but was cut off.
"but even Luxury members aren't allowed in the Royal wing, If you'd like, I'd be more than happy to go and alert them of your arrival" finished Feather Duster.
Both Diamond Tiara just stared. The Royal wing. Those annoying dorks were staying in the Royal Wing??? HOW?!
Silver quickly spoke up when Feather Duster turned to complete her task "No! No no, that won't be nessisary. We wouldn't want to bother them" she said, faking a sigh "I supposed we'll just have to see if they'll be in the gardens for afternoon tea"
Diamond nodded and the two turned and left, leaving a frazzled Feather Duster in their wake.
"How how how how HOW do THOSE LOSERS get to stay in Royalty wing?! It's not fair! This was supposed to be OUR vacation! OUR paradise!" Diamond whispered, quietly fumming as the duo walked back to their own suite.
Silver Spoon looked at her angry marefriend and nodded, glaring back down the hall towards the royal wing. It was supposed to be the perfect vacation, just her and her mare. She had been so excited; just the two of them together in paradise! Now those dorks just HAD to come and RUIN it just like they ruin everything! Oh they were going to pay...
View Online
Chapter 9 - Operation Dragon Horde is GO! Part 2
Ponyville; Castle of Friendship:
“Twilight, I’m not sure this is such a good idea…” said Blueblood; super secret super spy and secret agent extraordinaire “Why don’t we put this on hold, go back to the drawing board, and brainstorm? We’ll come up with a new plan and try again tomorrow, what do you say?”
“Oh come now Blue, you’re supposed to be an elite soldier right? Master of espionage? I’m sure this isn’t the first time you’ve had to infiltrate a compound by sneaking in the third floor window” replied Twilight Sparkle, princess of friendship and current wearer of a black skin tight leotard; because stealth.
“Obviously not, but I would still strongly suggest caution. Please think a little more about what we are attempting to do, and more importantly who we are trying to do this too, after all this is a god of chaos...and I barely survived the last three attempts!”
“Blue, you’re just being paranoid, and coming from me that’s saying something” the purple alicorn sighed “Look, if something happens to you, I’ll pay all your medical bills and compensate you with some new crystal tech or something, how does that sound? Just ask and it’s yours”
“You better…” grumbled the blonde haired secret agent as he checked and double checked his equipment; a harness and high tension rope along with a special grappling hook and launcher. He had also decided to wear an emergency parachute just in case and was also dressed in a black skin tight bodysuit, though his was more tactical than a conventional leotard.
The duo slowly began their assent, climbing up the ‘trunk’ of crystal structure before making it to the walls of the castle proper. From there, they added an emergency anchor to the castle side and proceeded to slowly make their way over to Disaray’s window.
“See? What did I tell you? Nothing to worry abou-” Twilight began, but stopped abruptly as the window opened and the barrel of a comically large cannon swivelled out and pointed down at them.
A low hum was heard as the cannon looked like it was sucking up light itself as the inside of the barrel glowed. The two’s horns lit up as they instinctively erected shields.
“See? Still nothing to worry about….” Twilight nervously said, more for reassurance that any actual belief.
Blueblood just sighed, resigning himself to his fate, his mind wandering to thoughts of retirement.
The cannon finished charging and there was a few second of silent stillness before both ponies were overtaken by a blinding flash. Slowly they managed to regain enough of their sight to look around them. They were currently in a tree. More specifically they were currently in an apple tree on the Apple family orchard. An apple tree that was right about to be bucked by one Big Mac.
The farm stallion bucked and apples fell, along with two ponies, landing perfectly in the laid out baskets.
“I told you it was a bad idea from the start….” sighed Blueblood
Twilight remained silent for a bit before sighing herself “Back to the drawing board?....”
Back with Team Chaos at the Pony Ponymeron:
Team Chaos was excited, they were going to a luxury nightclub! They quickly made their way to the back of the line of waiting elites. That is, until Mael gestured to them to follow. The group walked past the long line of ponies right up to the roped off entrance and the large minotaur bouncer, who gave them a look before nodding and undoing the rope, letting them pass. Behind them they could hear various stuffy ponies complaining and trying to raise a fuse, only to be silenced by the unamused snort of the bouncer.
The whole place seemed...rather cheesy. There was loud disco music, an old school light up dance floor, an open bar, and even a disco ball. It was the kind of place you’d expect from stuck up nobles who were out of touch with the times. It was sad really, more like a fancy expensive disco hall than a modern luxury nightclub. Their smiles slowly started to fall as they looked around.
“I can’t help but feel that the luxuries of our own headquarters has spoiled us to what would be considered high class luxuries here…” muttered Disarray, the others nodding in agreement.
“Well, we ARE the ultimate force of change right? There’s gotta be something we can do about this...whatever this is supposed to be” added Blitz, gesturing to the club.
“This...I think this is what happens when a bunch of old rich ponies try to act ‘hip’...dagnabbit, I grew up on a farm and I’m not this out of touch!” added Seed
Maelstrom just smile and looked over to Pop, who looked back and grinned, a sparkle in the shadow pony’s yellow eyes “Just say the word boss…”
“Party Pop, show these uppity ponies what a REAL nightclub should be like”
With a salute, the yellow party pony was gone in a blur. The group watched as the blur moved around the club at breakneck speeds, a whirlwind following in its wake. Decorations were replaced. Lights were switched out. The dance floor was replaced with a bright LED one. Even the walls were seemingly replasterd and repainted.
“Ok you ponies!” screamed Party Pop from behind the new, larger, DJ booth. There were mutters of confusion as heads turned, then murmurs of excitement as the faces in the club recognized the Master of Mayhem. “Who’s ready to PARTY?!” she screamed, getting cheers from the growing audience.
“You all are the elite of the elite! You came here to experience the best of the best; and there ain’t no party like a Party Pop party!” Pop continued on, spinning some of the records on the table. At this point the crowd was really started to get hyped. They WERE the elite of the elite, and this WAS supposed to be the best nightclub in the world! Many ponies shouted and cheered out in agreement to the yellow chaos goddess.
“So I’ll ask you again...WHO’S READY TO P-TO-THE-A-TO-THE-T-AND-Y?!” Party Pop screamed into a mic at the top of her lungs.
“Why?!” the crowd chanted back.
Party Pop just grinned darkly “Because we gotta….” she said before bass boosted music began to wub out of the speakers “Who am I?!” she yelled.
“Party Pop!” the crowd yelled back.
“Awwww here we go” said Maelstrom, moving towards the stage.
“Let’s do this!” said Blitz, grinning and dragging Chimera along.
“Woo!” cheered Seed. Her, Hymn, and Disarray making their way towards the stage as well.
The crowd was going nuts! Not one, but ALL of the gods of chaos here?! To throw them a private party?! This was worth every bit they paid to be here!! Party Pop looked at her friends and grinned before starting to sing. “Party Pop is in the house tonight! Everypony just have a good time! And I’m gon’ make you lose your mind! Everypony just have a good time!”
“Clap!” commanded Hymnphonic to the crowd. They didn’t have to be told twice, partly because of the hype and partly because of Hymnphonic’s powers, and all began clapping their hands and stomping their hooves to the beat.
“Party Pop is in the house tonight! Everypony just have a good time! And I’m gon’ make you lose your mind! I just wanna see ya….hehehe...Shake That~”
Disarray looked over at Hymn. They both grinned and said the same thing; “Erreh day I’m shufflin!’”
As Party Pop preformed, as the crowd danced and partied away, and as the staff who were busy serving drinks were off trying to find the resort owners to let them know what was going on, a duo of mares were off in a private corner booth, glaring with hatred at an oblivious Team Chaos.
Honestly, even if they knew that Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon were plotting their undoing….they were currently having too much fun to care. So ‘Party Pop’s Pop Up Party Palooza’ began in earnest, and all the elite agreed, it was the best all nighter they’ve ever attended.
Back in Ponyville; the following morning:
Blueblood was enjoying a very fine cup of amazing coffee in the cafe attached to the inn, after the most delightful night’s rest when Twilight furiously teleported in with a burst of magic.
“Blueblood! I waited up for you the whole night!” fumed the purple princess.
The super secret super spy just took a sip from his coffee, decreatly casting a sound suppressing spell around them so no one could listen in.
“I needed a rest Twilight...after what happened I think it’s the least I deserve, don’t you?”
Twilight couldn't help but deflate a little bit, her anger slipping away. Blueblood was right of course. She never would have guessed Disarray’s room would have been so well guarded and have so many traps. Sure she suspected a few, but it seemed everything they came up with Disarray had a contingency for. She was beginning to think she might have been underestimating her baby brother.
“Yea….” she finally said, sighing “You’re right, of course. I was just hoping to call in a quick and easy favor, I never could have guessed it would have ended up being this hard”
The white stallion smirked “Yes, who would have thought that breaking into a young dragon’s bedroom in a princess’ crystal castle would have proven to be thee most difficult task of my career”
They both shared a chuckle before Blueblood continued “However, that night’s rest and time to step back and think did allow me to have a clearer idea of what we’re dealing with”
Twilight nodded in agreement “When you didn’t show up, I took the opportunity to think up a few new strategies myself. I also took the liberty of working on couple of inventions to aid us...and to also say I’m sorry for dragging you in this mess. Though, the knowledge of who the Masters of Mayhem are is invaluable to putting a stop to them once and for all.”
Blueblood nodded and took another sip of his coffee “Yes. As you know, I have several agents stationed in Ponyville, but even they were unable to find anything” he said, finishing his coffee and standing up. “Now, shall we make haste to your castle? Burning daylight and all that”
Twilight smiled and nodded, admiring the Prince’s sense of duty and wit.
The duo made their way to the Castle of Friendship for the next, and hopefully final, round of Disarray’s traps. This wasn’t going to be easy, but with determination, they would succeed. For the good of Equestria, no, for all of Equis.
Twilight kneeled down a little ways away from Disarray’s door, Blueblood was next to her. The two had spent almost half an hour setting up Twilight’s new invention, positioning various sensored and thingamabobs in key locations and erecting a small blast shield in the hallway.
“It’s now or never” she said, taking another small object and tossed it over to the door. The object hummed before emitting a burst of magic energy, triggering the door’s many traps. Honey and feather fell from the ceiling, the floor turned to soap, the doorknob sparked with electricity, and fire shot out from around the door frame; however this time the duo weren’t affected.
Twilight smiled and checked the readings from the sensors, nodding to herself as she wrote down calculations on parchment and double checked them with the readings.
“Well?”asked Blueblood.
“Well...it seems the door itself is the trap. I suspect it’s the same with the windows, which is why we couldn’t get in that way. He specifically enchanted the items themselves, so I think the only and safest way to proceed would be to create a hole in the wall. I don’t think he expects me to intentionally destroy my own castle. I know a spell that will repair the damage...I’ve had a LOT of practice using it….”
Blueblood thought it over and nodded “Sounds like a plan, and crazy enough to work. Do you know a laser spell that’ll cut through the castle’s crystal?”
Twilight shook her head “I have laser spells, but they would blow away the whole room, not just cut a small hole in the wall.”
Smiling, Blueblood straightened his tie and fired up his horn “Then allow me” he said, the tip glowing brighter and a small beam of light shooting out and hitting the crystal wall. It was slow work, but eventually a hole was carved.
“Annnd there we go. Ladies first”
“Oh no you dont. I’m just a lab agent, you’re the field agent”
“I’m also the head field agent, so I’m ordering you to go first”
“Well, I’m a princess so I don't have to listen to your orders and am instead ordering YOU to go first”
With a sigh, Blueblood grumbled and nodded, before straightening his shirt and tie and stepping through the hole, ready for anything.
As soon as he had made it through, the hole sealed itself behind him. He could hear Twilight’s muffled gasp as he rolled his eyes. He knew this was a trap. The dragon lord of chaos had been extra thorough so far. If Disarray had magic in place to prevent ponies from teleporting into his room, there was no way he hadn’t thought about something coming through a wall.
The prince was curious though. Why go through all the trouble? What was it the drake was trying to hide? He began poking around while he was able, looking for any sort of folders or documentation...and of course that one special item he was tasked to find.
“Candy...Candy of All Candies….where would you be…” he muttered to himself, putting on a special pair of glasses that allowed him to slightly see through objects. Nothing, just as he had feared. “I guess Disarray just makes the candy appear on the spot when he needs some, not stores it anywhere. Which makes the most logical sense when you think about it…...Oh well, lets see if we can find any documents”
That also proved fruitless. To Bluebloods trained eyes, the room just looked like the normal room of a young adults. Action figures, comic books, various posters. Nothing out of the ordinary. A part of him wondered if it was all just a trick to hide something greater. Another part of him was beginning to believe this was just a normal bedroom. Why go through all the trouble of keeping ponies out then?
He moved to the door, reaching out to try and open it but deciding better of it.
“Hmm, I’d better not...and I don’t think I should try cutting through the wall again...how to get out…”
He moved around the room, inspecting everything one again. He thought about using the window, but remembered that it would be trapped as well. Wait! The bathroom! Disarray’s room had its own bathroom, there might be a way out in there!
Blueblood quickly made his way over and opened the door and slowly made his way inside, eyes scanning the room. As soon as he was over the threshold, the door slammed shut behind him, looking him inside.
“Should have figured…” he said, his ears picking up the sound of running water.
He turned and saw both the sink and tub overflowing onto the floor, tempting to drown the prince inside the small room.
“Huh, pretty generic but rather dark...drowning huh?...Maybe I can get that bathroom window open..”
Moving over to said window, Blueblood attempted to open it with both his hands and magic, failing to get it to budge. He was about to try again when a foofing sound from above caught his attention. He looked up just in time to see a snow of white powder coat him and everything.
Slowly, he brought a finger up to his mouth and licked. “Baking soda?...Why would….wait….” he said, looking down at the fizzing and bubbling that was happening at his hooved. More powder appeared and both the sink and tub began unleashing their contents in a massive torrent.
“Well played Disarray….well played….”
Outside, Rarity and Applejack were walking to Twilight’s palace.
“So little Bloom is sick as well? Poor thing, Sweetie has been down with a horrible case of the sniffles herself” said Rarity to her friend.
“Gosh darn it, I keep tellin ‘er to be more careful when they’re out there doin their ‘crusadin’ and the like. Gotta remember to check in with Dash about Scoots.” replied Applejack with a huff.
“Well, they aren’t little fillies anymore, a head cold isn’t going to do them in. Though, I don’t like seeing my sweet little Sweetie suffering so, Also, did you say crusading? While it does lead to them in quite the...mess...it’s good to hear they’re back to being their old selves.” replied Rarity.
“Old selves?” asked Applejack
“Oh, you didn’t know? They had stopped after the...Candy of All Candies incident…” they both shivered and Rarity continued with a soft yet overly dramatic sigh “I figured it was because of them finding out one of their best friends had turned evil. The three had grown really close to little Spikey Wikey over the past few years, so him turning into that...Disarray...must have really hit them hard. Especially Sweetie, she had a crush on him you know”
“Naw, I didn’t know that…huh….How did YOU know?” Applejack replied.
Rarity’s eyes lit up and she was about to go into Gossip mode when a giant stream of foam exploded out of one of the castle’s windows, expelling a well known and well dressed white unicorn right in front of them. Said unicorn was very thankful that there was so much foam that it cushioned his fall somewhat so he didn’t break anything.
“....Blueblood? Is that you?” asked Rarity cautiously.
“Good Morning Miss Rarity Belle” responded the prince, as he stood up and carefully began wiping the foam off this soaked clothing. “Miss Applejack as well, always a pleasure”
With a pop, Twilight teleported in, immediately flying towards the stallion. “Blueblood! Are you alright?!”
He smirked and nodded, continuing to clean himself off as Twilight continued to ramble on.
“Oh I’m so sorry! When the hole closed behind you I tried to open a new one, but some sort of shielding stopped me and then I tried yelling, but I think it was soundproofing the room, then I tried-”
Blueblood cut her off, shaking his head “It’s alright Twilight, but I am curious. How much respect did you and Spike have for each other before he turned into Disarray?”
The question caught Twilight off guard and she could only stutter “Huh? Um..w-why do you ask?”
“It’s just a thought really” shrugged the prince “He’s gone through a lot of trouble to keep people out of his room. I don’t think Canterlot Castle has this much security, not to mention all the failsafes. I might be completely wrong in my way of thinking here, but I don’t think he’d go through all the effort if he truly trusted his family.”
Twilight just sighed and glanced down.
“It’s just a thought though” said Blueblood. “Either way, I declare this mission a failure. I’m packing it up and heading back home”
Twilight just nodded “You dismissed Agent Blueblood…Thanks for all your help” she said at the prince nodded and walked away, muttering about how many showers he’s going to need to get the vinegar smell out of his fur.
“Mission a failure?” asked Applejack.
“Agent?” asked Rarity.
Twilight had forgotten they were there. She looked at her friends, then looked at her castle and the stream of foam still coming out the one window. She smiled a little and turned back to the mares. Normally she’d have to keep things like the ESS a secret. But they were both her bestest friends and fellow Elements of Harmony, if anypony needed to know, it’d be them.
“Yes, Agent Blueblood of the ESS...It’s a long story...over tea?”
“That would be lovely darling”
“Only if ya have apple spice”
Canterlot Castle; Celestia’s private study:
Blueblood entered the room, holding several folders in his magic and smelling very clean.
“Hardest weekend of my career and if I’m being honest I don’t know if you’ll be satisfied with the results…” he said, placing the folders on the desk in front of the smiling princess. “As you ordered, a copy of everything we’ve managed to find out. Princess Twilight is still waiting on my report. Unfortunately I couldn’t locate any of that Candy of All Candies but this is as far as I’m willing to go on the matter. Now, I’ll be taking me leave. Princess Twilight bought me a cruise to a luxury resort, supposedly the best on Equis, as an apology for all I had to endure. If you’ll excuse me, my princess.”
With that, Blueblood turned on his hooves and left without another word. Celestia smirked and opened the first of the folders. While it was truly a shame she couldn’t get her hands on one of those candies, this will have to do.
As she read on, her smirk turned into a frown. There was little to no useful information in the files. Nothing about their whereabouts. Nothing about their identities. Nothing about future plans. However, what was there, caused her great concern. The Masters of Mayhem were more powerful than she had originally given them credit for. They could pose a massive threat to her little ponies.
She read through each of the files, finally getting to the one on Maelstrom; the being that started this whole fiasco.
She was about to open it when Luna appeared behind her, offering her a single brown candy on a small silver saucer.
“Is….is that…”
“The Candy of All Candies? Yes dear sister”
“Lulu! How did you get this?!” asked Celestia, practically leaping at her younger sister, who stayed out of reach.
The princess of the night just shrugged “I asked Disarray for some. Unlike you, I still possess my common sense”
Celestia stared at her sister, teary eyes full of gratitude. She reached out to take it, but Luna pulled the saucer away.
“Not so fast, give me that folder on Maelstrom”
Celestia frowned.
“Luna, why? What would you possibly want with that folder”
“That's for me to know and you to find out. I told you, I have some personal theorems to confirm. Now give me the folder if you want the candy”
It was by far one of the hardest choices Celestia had ever had to make in her thousands of years of life. She weighed pros and cons, she argued with herself in her head, but in the end the Princess of the Sun gave in, and gave Luna the folder.
“Little sisters…” the sun princess grumbled, taking the candy and popping it into her mouth “they can be such a nuisance at times…” she muttered as waves of euphoria washed over her. Truly this was bliss. This is what she had been missing. This. This. This!
Luna just smiled sweetly as she turned and began walking out of room, mumbling “Oh you have no idea…”
Turning back to her older sister, Luna grinned darkly “Oh, by the way, I was only given the one piece. He said it would be enough for you to figure out how to reverse engineer it. Or you could just eat it, your choice really” she said innocently, leaving the study and closing the door behind her.
Celestia just stared, glassy eyed. That was the only one. Months of failure, months of going without sweets. Months of no candies and no cakes! She had had the answer in her grasp! She had been so close and now it’s gone! SHE ATE HER LAST CHANCE!
“No…” she muttered, eyes tearing up. “What have I done….” She could taste the flavor of the ultimate candy slipping away on her tongue. “no no no No No NO NO NO!”
From outside the room, walking down the hall, Luna smiled “It’s my turn to play, big sister, and this time I’m playing on the winning team” she whispered to herself, as Celestia’s voice echoed through the halls.
“NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooo!!!!”
Chapter 10 - Read At Your Own Peril
It was supposed to have been a quiet Tuesday morning. A certain purple alicorn princess was trying her best to partake in one of her favorite relaxing activities; reading her favorite books. This particular morning she had chosen a personal favorite: The Life of Star Swirl the Bearded. These special times, when she could just relax and enjoy herself, had regrettably become few and far between since her baby brother had become Disarray.
Admittingly a small part of her was happy he was growing into his own drake. Another part of her however was upset that she had failed him so, for him to go down such a dark and twisted path. He had become a villain. Granted there were still times they joked and laughed together just like they used to, as if nothing had ever changed. However she’d be lying to herself if she still wasn’t unnerved by his appearance; those black scales and glowing eyes. Then there were those ponies he teamed up with. He was her brother and she loved him, but she just couldn’t trust those Masters of Mayhem. They were rotten to the core, to borrow one of Applejack’s sayings, and they were just going to corrupt him and push him further down his dark path.
Oh if only she had discovered their identities when she had gained access to his room. Maybe if she had put more power into it? Maybe if she had turned the whole place upside down and inside out she would have found what she was looking for. He wouldn’t be happy, but surely he’d understand she was doing this all for him. Maybe he’d see reason, stop acting out like this, and go back to being her number one assistant; just like how things were. Just like how things should be.
Twilight was pulled from her musings by various loud and unusual noises coming from Disaray’s room. With a sigh she tried to concentrate, but the odd string of buzzing, boinging, hammering, drilling, whirling, and what sounded like wonky clockwork were driving her bonkers! It was bad enough he had to act out like he did and drive her up the way with his pranks. Bad enough her and the girls were constantly having to clean up the messes he and his team left behind. But to have him mess with her reading time?! To get between her and her favorite book?! That was it! With a huff, Twilight teleported right to the front of Disaray’s door, banging on it with her fist.
“Disarray! Disarray I know you hear me in there! What the buck do you think you’re doing?! You know fully well my reading time is sacred! SACRED! I don’t care if you’re the new god of chaos or not, you let me read! Do you hear me?! LET. ME. READ! Don’t you have something, anything, better to do than just annoy me?? You know, go hang out with your ‘friends’ or something, I don’t care, just let me be!”
Slowly the door opened, and there stood Disarray, arms folded with a very annoyed expression on his face.
“This can’t and won’t wait. Somepony broke into my room, or at least tried to. So I’m upgrading my security system. I thought a few well placed pranks here and there would do it, but clearly that’s not enough. I’m rewriting the very fabric of reality for this one!” the drake said, raising a brow at his big sister “Say, by the way, you wouldn’t happen to have any idea who tried to break in would you? Any sieges on the castle while I was gone or anything?”
Twilight blanched, the color slightly draining from her face as well as all semblance annoyance and anger. She was the guilty party, of course, but she couldn’t let him know that. The whole thing had been a bust anyways, Blueblood’s agents couldn’t uncover anything either, what little information they presented she had already known. She blushed a little and gave a sheepish smile to her brother who at this point was looking royally pissed.
“N-no. No one tried to break into the castle or anything. Maybe somepony was just trying to get you back for some of the pranks you’ve pulled? Seems perfectly logical, you HAVE managed to upset a good size of the Equestrian population”
Disarray studied her face, his anger seeming to flare for a bit before fizzling out. With a sigh he just shook his head. “Like us or hate us, you’d have to be insane to try to step up to us. I mean, we’re gods and the gags are just that...a joke. Let me be honest with you Twi...I don’t even keep anything valuable in my room. Nothing was stolen. The things that were messed up could be easily replaced…” The dragon turned away, seemingly lost in a thought. “It just the principle of the matter….” he said softly.
Twilight let loose the breath she didn’t realize she was holding. A part of her was relieved that she hadn’t been found out, another part was frustrated that it was all for naught anyways as there never was anything in his room. She was about to open her mouth to respond when Disarray softly said
“...the pony or ponies would HAVE to have realized I would know who’d done it…that I’d be more upset about….” He trailed off.
She froze.
“Look, Twilight” the drake said, fixing her with his gaze “you can read later, I need to finish upgrading my security system…” Disarray gave her one last look of...what was that? Betrayal? Disappointment? Those were definitely there, she could see them flash across his face. No, the expression she saw, one that made her heart sink a little, was his look of sad acceptance.
He turned away and the door started to close on its own before she stopped it with her magic. He knew. Oh no, he knew! How could she have been so stupid, of course he’d know! She had to get him to see. She did it FOR him.
“Look, Disarray...this whole Masters of Mayhem thing...it’s starting to get out of hand and I’m worried for you. I love you. You’re my baby brother.” She saw him flinch a little when she said that, but paid it no mind “Even if you have magic and powers now, I trust you. But what about the others? What about them? Are they trustworthy? Perhaps they are a lot more sinister and evil than you realize? Please, Disarray, just tell me who they are. I don’t want to see them hurting you. I...I tried to break into your room. It was me. I promise I won’t try to do it again if you’d just please tell me who they are…”
Disarray just rolled his eyes.
“I told you Twilight; that’s their secret. It isn’t mine to share. Besides, a very important part of friendship is trust, remember? No, you’ve clearly forgotten that. I trust them. They’re my friends. You should be able to trust in my judgement, and that should be enough”
Twilight just nodded slowly, ashamed of herself. She was supposed to be the princess of friendship after all. “I...I understand Disarray...but could you please do this later? I’ll even help you if you’d like, but please let me read”
A small puff of smoke escaped Disarray nostrils. “You read every single day. I’ll finish this in no time, granted you stop bothering me. Don’t tell me you can’t spend a single day without opening a book”
“What are you talking about?!” Twilight gasped. “Reading is very important for adults and foals alike! Books are a magic all their own, able to expand our minds and fill our imaginations. You could take the greatest and best trips in all Equestria! See far off lands! Learn about all sorts of plants! Explore never before seen places! All within a book!”
“Yes, yes, blah blah blah take a look it’s in a book, I know the speech Twi. Besides, I can go wherever I want with just a thought” said Disarray before disappearing and reappearing in a burst of purple flames, holding a miniature of the Eiffel Tower. “See? A nice souvenir from Maris, Prance. Now, if you’ll excuse me…”
Twilight frowned and stared at Disarray.
“I want to read…”
That was the point when the dragon lost his patience, and the last one of his fucks for the day fluttered away.
“Reading, reading, reading! If it was up to you, everything would be reading! No one would talk anymore, you’d have to read everything! I’ll be the first to admit the importance of knowledge, and that a good book can bring you lots of fun, but not everything is reading! Besides, you read every day, and I’ll finish this in like a few hours! Why don’t you read at any other time?!”
“Other time? Other time?! You don’t know how many headaches I have to deal with now when I organize my day to day schedule! My whole day is full of paperwork and appointments. Everything has to be planned out! I’ve already lost a ton of time just from this pointless conversation alone so no, I can’t just read some other time! And another thing. YES! Yes, I would do anything to live in a book, but since I can’t I have to conform to just an hour or so of reading in the library. So please, please, PLEASE pause your little project until then”
Twilight took a couple deep breaths to calm herself down. She didn’t mean to snap at him like that but he was being so difficult. It was about that time she started noticing black and purple energy arcing across his scales. What was originally just a wisp were now two black plumes of smoke pouring out of his nostrils. Purple flames leapt out the corners of his mouth and down his body. She finally started to understand just how angry Disarray was…
“Always bossing me around. Always making me stop anything I want to do, anything I needed to do, anything I enjoy doing, just because of your stupid books.” he said, flames shooting out of his mouth with each word.
With a growl that deep inhale, Disarray blew purple flames. They mixed with the arching energy and then pushed out like a pulse. This was the first time Twilight had really seen his powers at work, she could swear she could see reality itself rippling as his powers pulsed out over all of Equestria. It was so fascinating, but oh so very terrifying.
For the first time since his transformation, Twilight Sparkle didn’t see her rebellious baby brother Spike Sparkle. She saw Disarray; God of Chaos and Mayhem.
“Wh-what have you done?” asked Twilight, timidly.
Disarray just smiled as a ridiculously long beard appeared on the purple alicorn’s face, followed by a certain mage’s robes and hat, bells include. She quickly summoned a mirror.
“I’m...Star Swirl?” she asked out loud, giggling a little. At first she was worried, now she was amused “By my beard, thee shall know the full power of Star Swirl! Haha, this is pretty fun!”
Slowly, a realization begin to dawn on her. She was still her, in a way, but it seemed that the character of Star Swirl had been layered on over her. It was the incarnation of him from his early years, back when he was still an explorer. It was her favorite part. Back then, he was fearless, courageous, inventive, outgoing. She could feel all of it and more. Pools of ancient knowledge was flooding her head. She knew and understood things she knew she never knew before. She shaved her beard off magically, noticing how more and more of her mind was seemingly being overwritten by that of Star Swirls.
“No. No, I must resist” mumbled the alicorn, and slowly, slowly, she succeeded. “What did you do this time Disarray? This can’t be all of it!”
Twilight turned to find a closed and locked bedroom door, the strange noises having already restarted. With a shrug, Twilight took a few moments to enjoy her newly acquired ancient knowledge, letting her mind wander over subject matter she’d never even thought to think of.
“Hm, okay, this definitely is awesome. Maybe things won’t turn out so bad this time. I mean, come on, I’m Twilight the Bearded! Ha! Disarray, if you were trying to annoy me, you have failed absolutely miserably!”
She grinned and pranced around in place a bit “So much knowledge! To much to experiment with! So much to explore and experience! This is going to be the best day ever!” she proclaimed, throwing open the window to observe the world through the lens of her new mind. What she saw caused her to freeze, and her jaw threatened to drop to the floor. Disarray’s prank wasn’t nearly as amazing as she had originally thought it was.
Outside was Time Turner, an avid lover of dark scifi with a horror lean. He always borrowed books like H.L. Ponycraft from the library. Twilight watched as he was engulfed in purple flames and arching black energy and transformed into an eldritch horror; a creature as big as a dragon with a face covered in tentacles, enormous claws for hands, and giant webbed wings on it’s back. Orange eyes surveyed Ponyville. Cthulhu had been freed.
“That...that is definitely not right…” muttered Twilight with a gulp.
Behind her, Disarray chuckled. “Literature can be amazing, wondrous, and charming. It can also be very dangerous and in some cases quite alarming” hinted the dragon.
Twilight turned to face him, noting his own choice of costume; Humdrum from the Power Ponies.
“All have their favorite character from book, comic, tale, and fable. Try to stop this one, if you’re able.”
“I thought you didn’t like Humdrum…” said Twilight with a small frown, not liking the sudden direction the day was taking.
“Oh, not at first, but after what happened in issue number two hundred and fifty nine, where the Mane-iac dies, I can’t help but love the guy. You see, it turned out that the chemicals that gave Mane-iac her powers and drove her insane had also been slowly poisoning her the whole time. In her last moments she confides in Humdrum, who apparently was her childhood friend or something, and turns him into Ultra-Drum; the Power Ponies’ new arch nemesis. He was a complete failure as a hero, but as a villain he is amazing. Unlike Mane-iac who was just insane, Ultra-Drum is truly evil” answered Disarray with a grin.
“....seriously?” asked Twilight. “How long ago did that happen?”
“Hmmm, ironically it was around the same time I joined Team Chaos. Funny right? Anyhow, you’ll finally see how dangerous reading too much can be! Now, if you’re excuse me, I Have a security system to upgrade”
He teleported away and Twilight looked through the window again. Outside was pure chaos. She spotted Rainbow Dash in an explorer’s outfit fighting with a whip, not at all surprising, alongside Long Joan Silver the pirate. Ok, a little more surprising. Some noise caught her attention and she turned her head in time to see Fluttershy swinging from a vine giving a triumphant yell, leading a band of gorillas towards the Everfree Forest.
In other parts of town a suspiciously green Santa Hooves was climbing in and out of chimneys. In another part the derpy Mad Hatter and dinky Alice were sitting at an crooked table drinking tea. A squadron of flying monkeys flew over head at the orders of the wicked witch of the west. A worm drove by in an apple wagon, a mouse ran down the road with an overly large cookie, a fox in bright blue sox danced a jig, and a large caterpillar at a peach but still looked hungry.
“At least not everypony likes dangerous creatures…” sighed Twilight. “Well, here we go, same routine as always; gotta go find the girls”
Meanwhile, in Canterlot, in a dedicated wing of the palace, a select group of researchers, chefs, and experienced confectioners were studying a single crumb from a strange candle the Princess gave them using the best equipment bits could buy. Celestia thanked the sun she was messy eater in private or else she wouldn’t have had that crumb. She also thanked her desperation and frantic spell casting to search her whole study for any remaining specks of the candy she had so carelessly consumed. Now things were finally going her way. She would find out how to replicate that damned candy no matter the cost!
“So?...” she asked the ponies. “Mares and gentlecolts, you’ve had three days. Have you figured out anything? Anything at all?”
A researcher walked over to the princess, reading a clipboard “Princess, we’ve studies the speck as well as we good, and even though we didn’t have much to work with, we managed to get some molecular scans of it…” she began. “It truly is a wonder, by all reason it should be able to exist. It would be impossible to recreate such a thing using pony magic”
“Oh?” Celestia responded with a frown.
“I’m truly sorry Princess, we’ve managed to identify some components, but there are...components of the candy that we can’t identify. If I had to wage a guess, I’d hypothesis that they aren’t even of this world, as they don’t match anything we know or understand of reality. We can’t recreate things that are both magically and scientifically unclassifiable and frankly, impossible”
A chef piped up “Yea, we can’t recreate something that by all accounts shouldn’t even exist in the first place”
The vein on Celestia’s forehead bulged.
“Impossible? Impossible?! NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE!! IF THAT DRAGON COULD CREATE THIS THEN CERTAINLY THE BEST OF THE BEST IN EQUESTRIA COULD!”
“But Princess…”
“NO BUTS! I want that Candy of All Candies replicated as soon as possible!”
“Princess, in order to achieve that we would need teams of chemists, pharmacists, mages well versed in transmutation, schoolers of Fabric theory, botanists, and even herbalists just to name a few. We make candy, not mad impossible science. This marvel needs culinary skill, magic, and science to be created. We only ask for more help!”
After a few seconds of silence Celestia nodded, much calmer. Of course she would need a lot of help to recreate the Candy of All Candies. It’s only logical after all.
“Alight, I’ll start looking…” she began to say before jerking her head to side, ears erect to full alert. With all she had to do in support of the past few months of damage control due to to the Master of Mayhem, she had spell and wards put in place to alert her of any surge of chaos magic heading towards the castle.
She concentrated and poured all her power into created a small shield around that room. The idea was the block the magic to keep her staff from distraction. The shockwave caused by the clashing of Light and Chaos magic almost destroyed the lab, but the kitchen was ok.
“Princess, wince we are unable continue forward with the project, may we please go home?” as a chef near the back of the room.
“...Yes, I suppose you’d better” sighed Celestial. “When this is all over, we’ll resume and concentrate efforts into looking for more specialized personnel to support this investigation. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go see what Team Chaos did now”
Chefs and confectioners said their goodbyes and Celestia made her way to the throne room trying to guess what the prank was this time. Knowing what she did about Team Chaos, it could be almost anything. Nothing seemed to outlandish or silly for them. As she rounded a corner she came face to face with a pony she had hoped to never see again.
“Nightmare Moon!” she said, preparing for a fight.
The dark alicorn stood tall, her normal regalia and armor gone and in its place was a tight fitting pinstripe dress, complete with matching pumps with little skulls on them. She looked at Celestia with both confusion and suspicion.
“And just who in tartarus are you?”
“What do you mean who am I? I’m Celestia, your older sister!”
“Sister? I don’t have any sisters. I am alone...alone. Why are you hear? Why do you mock me so? Have you come to take my title as the Pumpkin Queen?”
Celestia knew there was never any point to trying to reason with Luna in this state, so she just sighed and let her magic flow through her horn, charging for an attack. Nightmare just let out an exhausted laugh.
“If that’s what you want….go ahead, take it”
Celestia felt as if she had been smacked across the fact. Her magic sputtered and she just stared at Nightmare Moon in front of her. She must have been hearing things.
“I’m sorry...what?”
“My title. Take it. I don’t want to be the Pumpkin Queen anymore”
Celestia was so confused. She looked at the dark mare in front of her as said mare make her way over to a nearby window, looking out with sad longing, music beginning to play from both nowhere and everywhere. What the hay was happening?! Celestia was about to vocally question what was going on when Nightmare Moon began to sing;
“There are few who can deny that what I do I am the best
For my talents are renowned far and wide
When it comes to surprises in the moonlit night
I excel without ever really trying
With the slightest little effort of my ghostlike charms
I have seen grown mares give out a shriek
With a wave of my hand and a well placed moan
I have left the bravests’ knees feeling weak”
Blue flames appeared, seemingly dancing along to the sad music. Nightmare Moon then turned to Celestia, the later still having a look of confusion as she facepalmed as the former continued to sing. It was clear now that this Nightmare Moon had nothing to do with the original.
“I’m the mistress of fright, a demon of the night
And I’ll scare you right out of your pants
To a guy in Cantucky, I’m Lady Unlucky
And I’m known throughout Ponyngland and Prance”
“And since I am undead, I can take off my head
To recite Shakesmarean quotations
From the worst to the best, no mare dare to contest
With the fury of my recitation”
Nightmare walked over to Celestia, sighed and sat down on a nearby chair. Celestia was curious where this was going, and even she had to admit...it was a really good song. Nightmare moon gave out a sigh, tears starting to roll down her cheeks as she muttered out “But who could ever understand...the Pumpkin Queen with the evil grin would tire of her crown. If only they understood...that I’d give it up if only I could”
“Oh, there’s a void down deep in my bones
That calls out for something unknown
The fame and praise come year after year
Does nothing for these empty tears…”
At this point Nightmare Moon was silently weeping, looking off to the horizon longingly.
This whole thing was just weird for Celestia. The song was beautiful, she had to admit, but seeing Nightmare Moon like this was strange. Still, it hurt to see her sister crying, so she charged her horn and hit her sister with a memory spell. Sad expression was replaced with confusion as Nightmare looked looked around.
“Huh….that was pretty interesting” the black alicorn said with a small smile.
“Indeed it was” agreed Celestia. “What was with that song of yours?”
Luna, still in Nightmare form, simply scratched her head
“I’m not sure, but it reminds me of a tale young Pip wrote me last Nightmare Night”
“Pip? Ah, that young stallion who admires you and sends you letters almost weekly?”
“Yes! That story is my favorite” said Nightmare “He wrote it himself. It’s about how there is a world of holidays, and Nightmare Moon rules over Nightmare Night as queen. It’s a town full of monsters and horrid creatures, who spend all year planning the next Nightmare Night and how they’re going to scare ponies. All for fun of course. Nightmare Moon gets bored and lonely of both her title and of doing the same thing year after year for centuries and decides to steal Heart Warming Eve”
“Is that so?”
“Yes, it has a lot of wonderful songs also written by Pip. The one I was singing was called Moon’s Lament if I am remembering it right. I love every part of his story, especially the ending when I found out that in the bottom of my heart I didn’t need a new holiday, I already had everything, I just needed somepony to share it with. I needed love, from his character also named Pipsqueak”
Celestia chuckled “well, as charming as it sounds, and I would love to read it later, we really need to figure out what the Masters of Mayhem are up to”
Without really anything better to do, Luna followed her sister; both ready for anything. As they made their way to the throne room together they found guards impersonating various characters, like one of the Musketeers who offered Celestia a diamond for her collar. One said he buried his treasure on the island of Monte Celestia.
One of the guards talked about finding treasure island, another laughed and talking about drilling to the center of Equis. Before both could argue, a third popped in and proclaimed he would fly around the world in only eighty days.
“Ah, well, Mystery solved then” said Luna “We’ve all been transformed into our favorite characters from our favorite books. Let us wait for the Bearers to solve this”
“How can you be so sure Luna?” asked Celestia
“Because I turned into a singing version of Nightmare Moon, these three guards are planning global ventures, and We do believe We hear one down the hall proclaiming something about a white whale. Moby Dick, a classic griffin tale. Either way, now we know what’s going on”
Celestia nodded. “I suppose we should wait”
“Do what you want, I plan on enjoying this”
And thus, Nightmare began to sing again, dancing her way down the hall.
Celestia looked on with a sigh “Oh great...I kind of wish I was affected by this….”
Back in Ponyville, Twilight finally managed to corner Rainbow Dash and blasted her with a memory spell.
“Twilight! Wow, so this is what it feels like to be Daring Do? This is so cool!”
“I know right?! Actually being Star Swirl is amazing! But we need to hurry and fix this before something bad happens”
“Something bad? Like what? Asked Daring Dash.
Twilight the Bearded pointed to her left...where a manticore roared loudly trying to fight Poinicules who was leaping left and right, avoiding the stinger of the beast. Suddenly Flutteryshy landed nearby with her army of gorillas.
“I, as queen of the jungle, demand you leave now or accept the consequences! I won’t tolerate ponies that attack my animal friends!” she proclaimed, pointing a finger at Ponicules.
Dash just raised an eyebrow and looked over to Twilight who just sighed and responded “Tarzan, King of the Jungle by Edgy Rice”
“Whatever, let’s hurry this up already!”
Rainbow quickly tackled Fluttershy while Twilight pulled the manticore away with her magic. One of Fluttershy’s gorillas pulled Dash away and attempted to throw her, but she recovered thanks to her Daring Do abilities. With her whip, she was able to keep the gorillas at bay.
“A little help Twilight!” urged Daring Dash
“Hold on for a few more seconds, we may have a bigger problem on the way” responded Twilight, looking up as a giant dragon flew over Ponyville.
“WHERE ARE YOU, LITTLE THIEF?!” it bellowed out.
On the other side of town, Hymnpnonic and Bad Seed were enjoying the show.
“Ah really should read more, there are so many interesting characters around and Ah only know where around half of em are from” the dark earth pony said, looking at a stallion who had turned into a mare, who was then narrating the events of another pony who was currently rubbing a gold lamp.
“Yea, but some aren’t that good…” sighed Hymn, looking at Applejack who had simply turned into a botanist and was just walking around telling everypony she came across about apple trees.
They shrugged and moved on, calmly walking down the street, simply enjoying the chaos around them since they already had orders not to intervene this time.
“Have you seen Disarray?” asked Seed
“Yea…” sighed Hymn “I’ve never seen him so pissed off. If I were Twilight, I’d go hide for at least a week”
Back with Twilight and Dash, they had managed to scare off the gorillas with some help from Ponircules and immobilized Fluttershy. One memory spell later and the yellow pegasus was profusely apologizing.
“Oh girls I’m so sorry! I never meant to attack you with gorillas! You should be very upset…”
“Not with you Fluttershy, not with you…” said Twilight, glancing back towards her palace. “Now, lets go get the others and be done with this craziness already. That damned Disarray! I’m actually thinking about not reading for awhile”
“I...um...I mean…” stuttered Fluttershy, staring at Twilight wide eyed.
Daring Dash raised a brow in equal shock “I never thought I’d ever here you say that, egghead…”
Twilight only grumbled in annoyance as the trio went to Rarity’s. Approaching Carousel Boutique they took note how it was oddly quiet. Dash leaned over to Fluttershy.
“What do you think Rarity’s favorite book is?” she asked, to which Fluttershy just shrugged.
They reached the door and knocked. Rarity answered, opening the door, but the white unicorn looked...different. Her usual perfectly curly mane was now completely straight and a few shades darker, her pristine white coat had a greyish tone to it, and her bored expression rivaled that of Maud Pie. Well not boredom per say; weariness.
“What, prey tell, do you want here...in this place?” asked Rarity.
“Um...are you feeling alright Rarity?” asked Twilight in response.
“Rarity? Is that my name? I can’t remember, but then again I can’t remember anything about my history, life, motivations, interests, passions, or really anything that would drive a story or provide plot development or even just a decent fleshed out character. Not that it matters. All that matters is Trender Hoof. He is an over a hundred year old vampire who wants to drink my blood and also is obsessed with my body. He likes to sneak into my house at night and watch me sleep, which I find romantic for some weird reason. All that matters is that I, a barely eighteen year old, am completely and unconditionally in love with him despite no actual reasoning and in the face of all logic and decent story telling. Somehow this is all seen as perfectly ok…not that it matters”
With that, she shut the door.
After a facepalm hard enough to give herself a headache, Twilight explained.
“That was a reference to-”
“Don’t bother Twi, who doesn’t know about that stupid vampire saga?” sighed Dash. “And just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse they went and had to make a play about it!”
Fluttershy agreed. “I went and saw it. It was painful.”
Twilight shrugged and forced open the boutique door with her magic and entered. The two outside could hear her struggling to secure and recover their friend.
“NO! STAY AWAY FROM ME YOU SERVANTS OF THE ZOLTURI! I BELONG TO TRENDER HOOF, HE’LL MAKE ME IMMORTAL!!”
There was a flash of light and Rarity calmly walked out of the door fixing her hair. Twilight followed behind, sighing and shaking her head.
“We won’t ever speak of this again. Ever! Understood?” Rarity asked sternly. Fluttershy nodded her head, Dash just tried to hold back snickers.
“Just two more to go” said Twilight “Applejack and Pinkie Pie. Pinkie’s house is the closest, let's hurry!”
They ran to Sugarcube Corner, but instead of the small bakery, they were greeted by an enormous factory protected by an iron gate that opened as they approached.
“Please, enter” a voice commanded over a loudspeaker. They slowly entered, looking around nervously.
“P-Pinkie?” called out Twilight.
“Come forward” the same voice commanded. They hesitantly began moving into the courtyard of the massive complex. “Close the gate.”
As the gate close, ominous organ music began to play and the girls got a good scope on how big the factory was. Slowly they made their way to the large front doors of the factory.
“Dear visitors and best friends, it is my absolute pleasure to welcome to my humble factory” the voice spoke out again. “And who am I? Well….”
Twilight was trying to figure out what book this was from, it was on the tip of her tongue when suddenly the doors and walls in front of them slid away, revealing a stage full of marionettes, puppets, and fireworks. Before any of the girls could comprehend what was happening in front of them, the puppets began to sing.
Pinkie Ponka, Pinkie Ponka
The Amazing Chocolatier
Pinkie Ponka, Pinkie Ponka
Everybody Give a cheer! Hooray!
She’s marvelous, clever, and so smart
She barely can restrain it
Filled with so much joy and laugher
There is no way to contain it
To contain it
To contain to contain to contain
Pinkie Ponka, Pinkie Ponka
She’s the one that you’re about to meet
Pinkie Ponka, Pinkie Ponka
She’s a pony who just can’t be beat
A genius and a chocolate wiz
The best darn mare who ever lived
PINKIE PONKA HERE SHE IS!
As the song finished a red throne with the letters PP engraved in gold rose from the floor center stage as several fireworks activated lighting the happy looking marionettes and puppets, making them melt and look really really creepy.
The five ponies just stood there in shock before one started to enthusiastically clap and cheer. The other four turned to the whooping fifth. It was Pinkie Pie, decked out in a red satin tailed coat, dark goggles, and a chocolate brown top hat.
“Bravo! Amazing! Spectacular! At first I was worried it was getting a little boring around the middle, but that ending! I mean wow!”
Twilight felt a huge sweatdrop on her forehead as she gestured to her friend.
“Pinkie...um...shouldn’t you be sitting up there?” she asked, pointing to the throne.
“Well, if I was sitting up there, how was I supposed to enjoy the show? Duh!” the pink party pony responded, looking at her friends and taking out a small stack of cards out of her coat pocket.
“Ahem. Now, let’s see here...Welcome distinguished guests and finders of the golden tickets, I am Pinkie Ponka” she began. “I will be personally giving you a guided tour through my amazing factory and afterwards each of you will leave with a truck full of Pinkie’s finest chocolate.”
Twilight shot her with a memory spell.
“What book was that?” asked Fluttershy.
“Calm Heart and the Chocolate Factory!” said Pinkie, bouncing happily. “It’s really fun and every time I read it I have to eat like ten or twenty chocolate bars of it would be absolutely torture! Delicious, yummy torture. So, what’s the big evil scheme this time?”
The girls explained it to her on their way to Sweet Apple Acres. Upon arriving, they found Applejack in her barn, standing in front of several chalkboards. The farmmare quickly ushered them in, sat then down on nearly placed hay bales, and began her speech.
“In today’s lesson, we shall delve deeper into the subject of Malus Domestica, better known as the domesticated apple tree. A tree from the rose family, it is cultivated worldwide as a fruit tree with the most common species being that in the genus Malus. Domesticated over fifteen thousand years ago by early pony settlers, today we count well over one thousand varieties as a result of countless hybrids between both farmed and wild varieties. If you’ll look to the board, I have taken the liberty to draw up a few charts, showing the genetic path took to create the variety commonly referred to as the ‘Golden Delicious’. Roughly several thousand years ago…”
“Oh sweet Celestia let’s do something before she bores us all to death!” protested Dash, covering her ears and rolling on the ground.
Twilight sheepishly raised her hand. “But it’s interesting!”
“Twilight!” protested the others.
Again a mare was shot, reluctantly, with a memory spell.
“Yee-hah!” cheered Applejack “That was mighty informative! Who woulda guessed Ah’d become the auther of mah favorite book?”
“We can discuss it later, and I may want to borrow that book..” said Twilight. “Right now, we need to finish this, quickly. How dare Disarray use my hobby against me! He can’t fool me, I know he did all this just to keep me away from him so he can finish his stupid project! Hmph! Well, lets undo this mess, we’re going to need to concentrate to really take care of this one, who knows how far the effects go.”
The girls nodded and they all got in a circle, holding each other hands. As soon as the ring was complete, they were overtaken by a purple flash of light. When their eyes finally adjusted they found themselves back in the Castle of Friendship. Down on the ground in between them was a single comic book. A comic book crackling with chaos energy.
“Oh ya got to be buckin kiddin me…” groaned Applejack as her clothes magically transformed into that of Mare-Velous.
The others quickly noticed their Power Ponies uniforms and sighs erupted from the group. Sighs and the sound of chuckling. Quickly turning, Team Harmony came face to face with Disarray, still dressed as Ultra-Drum, with a smirk on his face and a dark glint in his glowing purple eyes.
“Let me explain how this is going to proceed, hm? Do you still think that your want for books are more important than my needs or plans, Twi? Do you still think that your desire takes priority over my privacy? I already finished upgrading my security system hours ago, just like I said I would, but this is far from over. You pissed me off Twi, you really did. So do you want to end this? Defeat me. You as Matter-Horn and me as Ultra-Drum. You can even ask your friends for help, but in the end this is between you and me”
“Disarray, look...I know you’re angry but we can settle this as adults. There’s no reason to fight” pleaded Twilight.
The dark drake just shook his head.
“You still don't understand, do you? It’s always the same with you, you didn’t respect me before; hardly listening to me, always interrupting me, always sending me here or there at your will and if I didn’t want to you’d force me to do it with your magic. Enough! At first I thought you respected me a bit more when I became one of the new gods of chaos, but while I was away on vacation you went behind my back and tried to break into my room to snoop! To try and find out about private things you have no business knowing! So what do I do? I upgrade my security system. Twilight, I shouldn’t even have a security system in the first place, but I can’t trust you! I can’t trust you because you don’t trust or respect me….”
The anger and hurt was almost tangible in Disarray’s eyes.
“Best of luck Twi…” he said darkly “You’re going to need it. Power Ponies is a lot more mature now; darker with a lot more violence.”
With that, he seemed to melt into shadows and vanish away. The others turned to face Twilight.
“Seriously? You tried to break into his room? The room of your baby brother who happens to be a god of chaos? Not only have you crossed a line Twilight, this is just downright idiotic!” scolded Rainbow Dash.
Rarity nodded in agreement “And this is coming from Rainbow Dash darling…”
“Hey!”
“Why did you do it?” Fluttershy asked quietly “I mean, he may be a chaos god now, and be kinda scary...he still deserves a bit of privacy…”
Pinkie Pie didn’t say anything, just shook her head slowly in disapproval.
Applejack sighed “Ya really screwed up big this time Twi, he seemed right steamed at ya…”
Twilight lowered her head, slightly ashamed.
“Yes, I broke into his room...but I only did it because I wanted to know more about his friends, the other Masters of Mayhem! I thought if I could find out any more information them, like who they really were, we would be better able at handling them. Maybe even find a way to stop them for good and save Disarray...but I admit, I shouldn’t have broken his trust like that. It’s unfair to him. Sorry.”
“We ain’t the ones ya gotta say sorry to. Apologize ta Disarray when ya see him” said Applejack “And ah mean it; apologize!”
Twilight nodded. She would think of the proper way to say she was sorry later, right now it was time to fight and finally put an end to this mess.
Her bravado was short lived at the comic book flew open and sucked Team Harmony inside. The last thing she could remember seeing was the ‘T for Teen’ rating on the cover.
“Disarray, please stop this, I’m begging you!” screamed Twilight as her Power Pony alter-ego Matter-Horn “I won’t invade your privacy every again, I swear on Celestia! Now please let us out! One of the girls or I could get really hurt!”
Silence. There was no answer, nothing but the distant sounds of sirens, running water, and the crumbling of buildings. Maretropolis was a warzone. As soon as the team arrived they were jumped by gangs, grunts, and hench-ponies. They had to fight their way through wave after wave, block after block, using much more violence then the old comic rating would have ever allowed.
Finally, they found a break in the seemingly endless waves of generic baddies to catch their breath. Twilight took the time to try to once again plead with her baby brother, but he wasn’t there to hear her.
“I don’t think it’s going to work…” said Fluttershy quietly, now Saddle Rager. “We have to defeat the big bad guy to get out...but do you think Disarray really wants to...to hurt us?”
“Naw sugarcube, it aint US he’s mad at” replied Applejack, now as Mistress Mare-velous. She gave a brief glare to Twilight before turning to the others “We gotta figure out who the big baddie is here an what their evil plans are, and we gotta do it fast. Ah think the best thing ta do would be ta split up an cover more ground”
“No, wait!” called out called out Rainbow Dash, beginning to think. “Disarray had said something about being our villain here too, right? Something about an ‘Ultra-Drum’. Whatever that means…”
Matter-Horn nodded. “Ultra-Drum, the ultimate form of Humdrum. Yeah, he told me a little about that. Evidently Humdrum goes evil in the comics and becomes the Power Ponies’ greatest rival or something. From how Disarray was describing it, Ulta-Drum had their backs to the wall, like he was really a force to be reckoned with”
As the others were processing this information, an earthquake violently shook the entirety of Maretropolis, startling them Above them, projected across the sky, was the giant sinisterly smiling face of Ultra-Drum. The team could hear the terrified and panic screams of citizens throughout the city.
“Good Evening Maretropolis. It is I! Your worst nightmare incarnate; Ultra-Drum!”
Bright purple fireworks shot across the sky as six different spotlights shot their beams into the air.
“Allow me to explain tonight’s game. Atop of six skyscrapers throughout the city there are six beacons. Each beacon is attached to a bomb. That bomb is capable of leveling everything within a three block radius. At exactly midnight the bombs will go off simultaneously...unless your beloved heroines can deactivate them in time. Eh, more accurately, can deactivate them at the SAME time. Doesn’t that sound like fun? Power Ponies, I’m speaking directly to you now, I know you’re listening. I’ll get you back for what you did. I’ll avenge Hair Beauty. I’ll exterminate you, even if it means leveling this entire city! So let's see if you’re as powerful as you boast, because one little slip up and this will be your last night alive!”
He laughed evilly as the project faded away.
“...Is it just me or did this comic get like mucho darker?” giggled Pinkie Pie. “I never knew Disarray was into these kinds of dark comics. Then again, he IS one of our bad guys now. Like, in the real world, not in the comic. But now he IS one of our bad guys in the comic. So, is he like...DOUBLE bad now? Or is he just as bad but is just spreading it out? Did you see how well he got into character back there? He looked really frightening, massive chills! Oh! Oh! I need to get into character too!” said the now in character Fili-Second.
Matter-Horn sighed in annoyance. “As soon as we get out of here, I’ll writing a strongly worded letter to the author about this. These kinds of comics can’t be good for young minds”
“Ya mean before or afta you apologize ta Disarray? Cus Ah don’t reckon he’d be to apreciative about you messin with his comics too” scolded Mare-velous “But in the meantime, let’s get a move on!”
Radiance looked to Matter-Horn. “Alright darling, you’re the leader, what should we do?”
The purple alicorn turned superhero looked at her suit, then at her friends. “Right. All the bravado aside, we got a lot of information. Ultra-Drum warned us what would happen if we acted separately and rashly. Zapp, Fili-Second, If I’m right then you two will be the first ones to arrive to your beacons. Please don’t deactivate the bombs until ten minutes to midnight. Eleven fifty, understood? We’ll synchronize our watches, it’s our only chance. Remember, not until eleven fifty”
What if...what if we don't make it?” asked Saddle Rager. “I don’t mean to sound pessimistic, but you know, what if more henchmen come to stop us? How can we be sure the others made it in time?”
“I was right about to get to that” said Matter-Horn. “Fili-Second, go buy us six industrial brightness flashlights, and six sheets of cellophane paper, all different colors. As soon as one of us arrives to our bomb, we signal the others”
Fili-Second disappeared and reappeared with the requested items.
“You owe me twenty five bits M.H.”
“Got it” replied Matter-Horn. “Now, when you see the other five lights in the sky, that would mean you’re clear to deactivate your bomb. But NOT until eleven fifty! Alright?”
“Okey-Dokey-Lokey! Power Ponies; assemble! I mean, separate!” cheers out Fili-Second before disappearing in a flash.
Zapp was dying to get into the action and, as Matter-Horn predicted, was the first to arrive to her bomb site. The device in question was sitting out in the open in the middle of the room. Too easy. As Zapp flew up to the device, she suddenly felt as though she were being watched. She turned around to find the was surrounded by ponies dressed in black with a silver U embroidered on their chests.
“Ultra-Drum’s hench-ponies I presume” said Zapp, taking her amulet in hand. A small tornado would easily do the trick.
The winds began to blow around her enemies. Enemies that were all suspiciously wearing gas masks. That was when Zapp noticed said winds were lifting a strange and rather suspect white powder off the floor around her. A powder that was causing her to cough and gag.
“I-I have more than just tornados!” she said between coughs, extending her wings to scatter the white powder away from her and then summoning bolts of lightning to finish the henchmen.
It seemed Ultra-Drum was still a few steps ahead as the power was explosive in nature. The sparks from the lightning bolts ignited it and caused an explosion that ending up sending Zapp into a nearby wall.
The cyan pegasus spit out some blood and grinned “this comic just got twenty percent cooler…”
The henchmen were approaching, some brandishing various weapons. Leaping onto her hooves, Zapp punched the one closest to her, and gave a power kick to the next. There only a handful of ways she could ever see herself being defeated but by a group of push over henchmen wasn’t one of them. Zapp quickly took her amulet and summoned a hail storm against her attackers, who ended up knocked out by it.
At least she thought they were, after a few seconds the bagan to get back up, shaking off the attack like it was nothing.
“We’re a lot stronger than before Zapp. We had to get some...improvements, when the new boss took over.”
Zapp just grinned. “Sounds fun, but I’m on the clock. So if you’ll excuse me, I’ll finish you off now”
Once again Zapp took her amulet in hand and sent a blizzard that both blew away the powered and floze the henchmen in place. Then finished the job with lightning bolts; one for each henchpony. With the grunts now out of the way, Zapp was free to access her bomb.
“That was fun, but I don’t think Radiance and Saddle are up for T rated comics. I’d better go help out”
And with that, she flew off to aid her friends.
Meanwhile, back at Twilight’s Palace, Hymnphonic was walking around the castle’s library looking for something. Eventually, after checking the catalog cards twice, she found it.
“HA! Gotcha! The complete works of H.L. Ponycraft volume one!” she announced happily, looking through a window “this ought to be amazing. According to this, those two weird things fighting out there are Cthulhu and Yog-Sothoth. Two evil alien gods created by this author. That’s so cool! I have to read more in my free time.”
“You know it's rude to talk about your coworkers behind their back” said Maelstrom idily, as they flipped through a book on the history of radishes “and Ponycraft didn’t create them, she just kinda...realized their existence”
“Wait, so they actually exist?!” screamed Hymn “Can I meet them?!”
“Of course they do, they are like super stars around the department. Been doing it even longer than I have, waaaaaay longer. I’ll introduce you at the next department shindig, ok Hymn?” asked Mael, in time to get tackle-hugged by a grinning unicorn
“you’re like the best boss ever, you know that?”
“I try”
“Hey, look at this guys. Isn’t that Pipsqueak?” asked Shadow Blitz, who had been looking out another window.
As the two ponies turned cosmic beings were fighting, out of nowhere Pip charged into the battle, swinging around on some sort of steam powered contraption. The small stallion was in a blind rage.
“I’M GONNA KILL THEM ALL! I’M GOING TO KILL ALL THE TITANS!!!”
When he was close enough, he bit his own hand and turned into a giant monster who roared and joined the fight.
“Cool!” cheered both Cimera and Party Pop.
“Yeah” commented Blitz “Didn’t know Pip liked Attack on Titan”
“I’m more surprised about Feather Weight” said Bad Seed. Said pony was dressed in a light blue jacket and red scarf, running towards a volcano in the distance.
Some ponies were really obscure, making it hard to figure out who both their character’s and the pony’s identity. Others, not so much. For example, the human who was currently running down the street screaming “See?! I Exist! I Exist!” had to be none other than Lyra.
Bad Seed glanced back at the Power Ponies Comic. It’s cover still crackling with chaotic energy, and every so often the comic would twitch a little.
“Are any of you worried about them? I mean, that issue is where things get pretty dark, not to mention rather violent. Do you think they’ll be ok in there?”
“Meh, they’ll be fine, their Harmony powers will protect them from the worse of anything Disarray dishes out at them” replied Maelstrom, now reading a book on the history of The Funky Chicken.
“What do you mean by that?” asked Hymn.
“Well, just like I gave you all access to the powers of Chaos, they have access to the powers of Harmony. They just don’t realize it yet, which is why we get to have so much fun. However, some of their more passive powers should activate on their own”
Now it was Seed’s turn to be curious “Passive Powers?”
“Yea, things connected to their element. Ever notice how no matter how glum the situation, Pinkie Pie can make it seem cheerful? Or how even though Rarity is self-entitled, snooty, pompous, and rather full of herself, she can’t help but act generous...and those generous acts seem to have a direct positive impact on her, whether it be items or favors or prestige? Or even how your own sister, Applejack, seems to be a walking lie detector, and also seems incapable of lying? Passive harmony powers and effects” said Mael, nodding sagely “Both Harmony and Chaos have active and passive powers. If you don't know what they are, and the other side does, sometimes they can manipulate them to their own benefit”
Bad Seed, Hymnphonic, Shadow Blitz, Chimera, and Party Pop looked at their boss wide eyed as Maelstrom grinned.
“In fact, that gives me an idea for our next big thing….”
Back in the comic book, in the fictional city of Maretropolis, Saddle-Rager was immobilized by four of Ultra-Drum’s henchponies. She was trapped, scared, and wishing she could just be home in bed. Having been cornered, she currently had her back to the wall, surrounded by four henchponies.
She was frantically looking around for any way out when she saw a fifth hench-ponies slightly kick a stray cat that was getting too close as they walked towards the group. Something inside of Saddle-Rager snapped, causing the once timid hero to turn into an irrational muscle mass of might and fury that tackled the nearest hench-ponies and began punching them over and over again. Another tried to be brave and rush her, but she just backhanded them through a nearby wall, said henchpony didn’t get up. With a growl, Saddle-Rager leaped into the air, landing with an impact that cratered the ground and threw the remaining hench-ponies off their hooves. Saddle than grabbed one by their leg and used them to beat another until neither moved anymore. She then flung the limp pony in her hand over a nearby building.
“I WILL DESTROY YOU ALL!!!!!”
The last hench-pony just stood there in a small puddle of their own urine, staring wide eyed and frozen in fear as Saddle-Rager balled her hands into large fists and leaped into the air with a loud shout.
“SADDLE SMASH!!”
The hench-pony knew pain, then nothing.
It took smashing a nearby dumpster, but Saddle-Rager managed to calm down. The poor pegasus breathing erratically at the sight of the destruction, mangled bodies, and her own bloody hands.
“Oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no wh-what have I done? What have I done???”
“It’s ok S.R.” said Zapp, flying above her. “It’s fine. This is a T rated comic, a lot more violence”
“But-but I really hurt them” whimpered Saddle-Rager
“Saddle...they aren’t real. None of this is, it’s just a comic. So you didn’t really hurt anypony” replied Zapp, landing her to her friend and rubbing her trembling shoulder.
“....r-really?” squeaked out Saddle-Rager.
“Really Really, now let's go save the day” Zapp said, gesturing towards another wave of hench-ponies that were running towards them. One of the hench-ponies made the mistake of stepping on a rat’s tail, making it squeal in pain. Saddle-Rager’s blood boiled. She felt herself become become enraged and gave out a roar, leaping towards the Henchponies.
Zapp smiled and gave a proud nod, softly saying “You go get em mare” before flying off. It seemed Saddle-Rager had things covered at her beacon. The weather mare wondered how the others were doing, especially how Rarity was holding up. Even with her powers as Radiance, she wasn’t the most ‘hardcore’ so to say.
Speaking of Radiance. She was currently using her light crystals to create cages, large pillows, and paper balls to attack and keep the baddies away. Surprisingly it was very effective. This was mainly due to the confusion her attacks were causing the hench-ponies who were trying to understand the heroine’s new strategy.
“I...I don’t get it. Do you think she’s trying to lure us in, thinking she’s gone soft, then knock us out with a pulsewave?”
“Naw, I think she’s just trying to get us to lower our guard so she can do to use what she did to Bob”
“Oh don’t remind me! That poor guy, did he ever wake up from the coma?”
Suddenly a cage of light appeared around the two hench-ponies, who looked around frantically until their eyes met that of Radiance. Said heroine was camly walking up to them.
“Excuse me darlings, but what exactly did I do to your friend? I don’t remember.”
“Don’t remember?! You almost killed him!” one of the hench-ponies angrily proclaimed before remembering that they were stuck in a cage and may suffer a similar fate.
“Yea!” the other spoke up, feeling a little better as Radiance dropped the cage. At least now they could possibly run away if they needed to. “You knocked up into the air and threw a building with a giant bat, then fly up and smash him into the ground with a giant energy fist. It was scary.”
Radiance just blinked in surprise “I did all that?”
“Of course you did! That why we don’t understand your moves now!”
Radiance was about to answer when Fili-Second appeared next to her, giggling.
“Oh, hi Radiance! I came to help you because I saw you fighting and while throwing pillows can be super fun this is a big kid book and those are kiddy comic book moves and you need to really start to get in there and fight so i thought you could use a quick lesson in comic violence beat-em-ups so I came running over to show how it’s done!” Fili said, then inhaled. “Now check my moves!”
Radiance just shook her head.
“Fili-Second, I am well aware of how teenage comics are. I CHOOSE not to partake in such filth, I know how overly violent and...sexual...they can by. That’s why I NEVER allowed Sweetie Belle to read such things”
“But isn’t your favorite book series…” Fili-Second began to ask.
“Completely different! That’s TASTEFUL violence, and POETIC sexuality! Totally different! Anywho, I don’t need help, I have anything under control here”
Of course, Fili-Second wasn’t listening. She grinned and focused on a baddie who began to sweat nervously. Crouching in a runners position, she gave a wink to Radiance and took off at full speed, hitting the henchponie in the chest. Said pony beck knocked back a little, but none of the worse for wear, looking around confused to see where Fili-Second had gone. She was nowhere to be seen as she was picking up speed, running around the planet.
Running an entire lap after just ten seconds, she came back up on the guy, this time punching him with enough force to launch him several meters into the air. Without missing an instant, or loosing any speed, Fili ran up the side of a building and launched herself off, punching the guy mid air and knocking him higher. She then landed on another building, ran up a little, launching and knocked higher. She kept this up until the two were almost a hundred meters off the ground. She then ran up, launched into the air on last time, and landed a downward kick that knocked the guy down so hard it left a small crater.
“Just. Like. That!” Cheered Fili-Second “It’s easy, try it!”
Back in the outside world, the Master of Mayhem were all crowded around the comic, reading what was transpiring within
“Oooo, I think I felt that one. Poor guy” commented Blitz.
“Just look at Rarity, she’s in total shock!” giggled Party Pop.
“Did you sis really ban you from reading teen comics?” asked Chimera.
“Puh-lease! I’ve been reading ADULT comics since I was a teenager. Have a nice collection stashed away too. But yea, look at my sister tremble, she looked like she’s about to freak!”
The others just giggled as they went back to reading.
Back in the comic world Radiance gulped, still in shock at the demonstration of blatant violence and the fact that Fili-Second just assumed her role in this crass comic so naturally. She would have to remember to ask Twilight about keeping an eye on her. The remaining hench-ponies were slowly backing away, not wanting to have to deal with both Radiance and Fili-Second.
In another part of Maretropolis, Mare-velous didn’t have any problems accepting the new nature of the comic; especially when she had to defend herself from a group of ponies with knives and swords. With her unbreakable lasso she opened a can of whoop-ass on them something fierce.Another wave appear and she just ginned. It’s been awhile since she’s gotten to use her full strength. Seems the only thing that can get her serious is that rival of hers Bad Seed. Mare-velous frowned. Best to not think about Bad Seed right now and just focus on the task at hand.
With the final grunts out the way, she walked up the bomb and turned on her flashlight. Looking out onto the city’s skyline, she could see Fili’s signal, Zapp’s, Saddle-Rager’s, and Radiance’s. There was just one more to go. She checked her watch. There was still enough time, but they may be cutting it close.
“Almost there. Come on Matter-Horn, apologize. Do the right thing”
Back in the real world, in Canterlot, Princess Celestia was enjoying herself by looking out over her city and guessing who were who. After a couple hours of this, she had come to the conclusion that she had a lot to read. Rather sad that she got so behind, but paperwork is no joke.
She saw many princesses from old folk stories and tales. She saw animals from fables. She saw beings that could only exist in the imagination.
One of her female guards was wearing a black dress and showing to a bunch of winged monkeys. “Fly, Fly my minions! Bring me the red slippers! Now fly!”
Another guard with wild hair was just walking around muttering “Who created the Pyramids? Humans! Who is conspiring with the government? Humans! What’s the answer to all the mysteries of Equis? Humans!”
It was chaos, but enjoyable chaos. Everypony liked different things, and it was nice to see so much diversity. Ponies like to act like one big uniform herd, but they are all different, they are all individuals.
Smiling happily, Celestial went back to the Throne Room. Inside, Nightmare Moon was sitting in the middle of tables full of Hearts Warming decorations and Scientific equipment.
“Luna? Nightmare? What’s up with you?”
Nightmare Moon, the pumpkin queen, grinded her teeth in frustration and began to sing.
“Hearts Warming, buzzing in my skull
Will it let me be? I cannot tell
There are so many things I cannot grap
When I think I’ve got it, and then at last
Through my thin fingers it does slip
Like a snowflake in a fiery grip”
“Something’s here I’m not quite getting
Though I try, I keep forgetting
Like a memory long since past
Here in an instant, gone in a flash
What does it mean?
What does it mean?”
“Luna? Sis, are you feeling alright?” asked Celestia. Nightmare just ignored her and continued her song.
Simple Objects, nothing more
But something’s hidden through a door
Though I do not have the key
Something’s there I cannot see
What does it mean?
What does it mean?
What does it mean?
hmm…
I’ve read these Hearts Warming books so many times
I know the stories and I know the rhymes
I know Hearts Warming carols by heart
My head’s so full It’s tearing me apart
As often as I’ve read them, something’s wrong
So hard to put my dark finger on.
Again Celestia shot her sister with a memory spell, more worried than before. Luna just looked around confused, than gave her sister an equally worried look.
“Tia, we must hurry! The more time we spend like this, the more the character takes control of our minds! What delay’s Twilight Sparkle and her friends? What haven’t they stopped this already?”
“There must be something holding them up” reasoned Celestia, getting slightly worried. “Perhaps the Master of Mayhems’ tricks are affecting them just as much as they’re affecting you. I’ll help them, but you need to stay here. This version of Nightmare Moon, she isn’t dangerous is she?”
“No. I think the most I’ll try to do is steal Hearts Warming Eve, maybe scare a few ponies, but nothing more”
Celestia nodded and left the throne room. Quickly she found the nearest balcony and took off, flying to the aid of her once faithful student now fellow princess. She could see tall creatures in the distance; from giants, to elder dragons, to strange beasts.
After almost fifteen minutes of flying she arrived at Twilight’s castle, eluding the battle between Smog and a colossal pony. Stopping for a moment, she wondered to herself why she didn’t just teleport like she always did, remembering the lessons of the first prank.
“Twilight? Twilight where are you?” she called out as she entered through the front door. She easily deduced that Twilight would have been turned into a version of Starswirl, and so would probably be in her library reading. The solar alicorn quickly made her way. However, instead of finding Twilight, she found Maelstrom and the Masters of Mayhem casually reading a comic book.
Chimera looked up and smirked “Huh, Princess Celestia. I’m guessing from her autobiography?”
“No, it’s actually me. Thanks for asking” she responded, looking at each member. This was the first time she’d seen Party Pop and Chimera. They were strong, she could feel the chaotic energy they gave off. In fact, she could feel the energy all the members of Team Harmony gave off. She could feel the difference in power from when she first met the few back during their first prank, to now. They were definitely getting stronger. What unnerved her the most was Maelstrom. She couldn’t detect anything from them.
Celestia wasn’t in any way worried about Team Chaos though. She had thousands of years more experience than they did. Besides, she was here for Team Harmony.
“Where are your counterparts?” she asked.
The green haired one, Hymnphonic, just pointed to the comic they were reading.
“In there, after Twilight got Team Harmony back together, Disarray laid a trap for them and zapped them into the comic. I think he’s trying to work out some things with Twilight. Believe me, I’ve never seen him that pissed off before in my life”
“Pissed off?” asked the sun princess.
“Popcorn?” offered Maelstrom. “This is really starting to get good”
Celestia thought for a moment, weighed her options, then nodded and sat down next to the multi-limbed blue chaos god, reading the comic alongside the others.
Matter-Horn ascended level after level of her building, reaching the top no problem. There were minimal goons, all of them pushovers. The way might as well have been completely clear for her. Soon she was at the top, staring at the beacon and bomb. It was all too easy and she knew it.
“What’s going on here?” pondered Matter-Horn.
As she walked towards the bomb, she stepped on a landmine that sent her flying into a nearby wall. She felt like she might have actually sprained something. “Oww……”
Ultra-Drum’s laugh could be heard echoing around the room as he appeared, purple fire dancing off his black scaled body. “I hope you’re ready Twilight…”
“R-ready for what?”
“For a rated T comic. This is going to get violent.”
Twilight gulped. “Do you think you’re really capable of hurting me?”
“Oh, I don’t know. Do you think you’re really capable of breaking into my room?”
Twilight cringed a little at that, looking into the solid purple eyes of the being that was her baby brother and pleaded with him. “Please Disarray! I’m sorry! I know I shouldn’t have done that but please try to understand. I was just so afraid for you, and wanted to make sure your friends weren’t a threat to you, or to the rest of Equis. Please Disarray, I HAD to do it!”
“THAT DOESN’T EXCUSE WHAT YOU DID! DOES MY TRUST MEAN SO LITTLE TO YOU?! I’m the team leader. They answer to me and I answer for them. Doesn’t my word mean anything to do? I was your oldest and closest friend, I’m your little brother, doesn’t my trust mean enough for you to not break it so casually? Why can’t you trust my decisions?”
“Disarray…I...”
“It’s so much deeper than that. You didn’t respect me before, and you don’t respect me now, even though I have the power to warp reality itself at my claw tips. I’m as powerful as you are in magic, and yet you try to pull this? You betray what trust I have in you just because you had a hunch it’ll serve some greater good? All because you couldn’t trust me and my judgement”
Disarray sighed and continued “Honestly, I know it looks like I’m blowing this out of proportion. After all, all you did was go in my room without permission. But this isn’t the first time you’ve betrayed my trust. This is just the latest piece of hay in an ever growing stack. Do you realize how much I had to stuffer all these years before I got these powers?”
“Disarray...no, Spike, try to remember! We spent so many great times together!” This was it. She’s reach him and turn him good again! If she could break the spell Discord had put on her friends all those years ago, she can undo whatever that Maelstrom did to her brother! “Remember all the friendship lessons? All the adventures we had together? The diary! Remember the diary we all wrote together? Me, you, and the girls?”
“You mean that stupid diary you made ME write FOR you all when you all had those adventures without me? Do you even realize I wasn’t there for nearly all of that? Did you ever realize? Did you even care that you always left me behind? Did the thought ever even pop in your mind?”
With each question, the flames around Disarray began growing bigger and more wild
“And by the by, in case you still don’t get it, my name isn’t Spike anymore. It’s Disarray! Draconic God of Chaos! Chief Master of Mayhem! You can go straight to Tartarus Twilight, now prepare yourself!”
The two stared at each other, a pair of eyes literally sparking with fury, and other pair teary and ashamed. It was around this time Twilight began to realize the truth. This whole thing wasn’t the temper tantrum of a child begging for attention, or the wrongdoings of a corrupted teen acting out just to be rebellious and edgy. No, these were the cries of somepony hurting. Her brother was hurting, and it was all her fault.
After almost a minute of silence, Twilight lowered her head.
“Just….do it. Get it over with”
Disarray just raised a brow “what?”
“I realize I should have respected you more, and I’m sorry Disarray. You were...ARE...my best friend, my first friend next to Shining. You’re my baby brother and I love you. I love you, and I hurt you. If beating me up makes you feel any better, if it stops the hurting, than go ahead. I won’t fight back, I promise. I deserve it, so just go right ahead, beat me all you want”
With a roar, Disarray lunged. His large clawed hand engulfed in purple flames and crackling with black energy arching towards Twilight, who just closed her eyes and awaited the inevitable.
The lavender princess could feel the air heat up. She felt hot wind moving past her face as Disarray’s attack got closer and closer. Just as it was about to make contact with her face, he stopped.
“I can’t…”
“Huh?”
“In the comic...this comic...I’m supposed to kill you. There’s this big fight scene, and some stuff is said, and Ultra-Drum kills Matter-Horn...but I can’t do it”
Disarray let his arms fall to his sides, sighing. “I won't…”
Twilight gave a half smile and hugged him.
“Thank you. I know I hurt you but I promise I’ll make it all up to you. Everything is going to change from now you, you have my word. We’ll be closer than ever, and do all kinds of stuff together. I’m not just saying this cus you’re a chaos god now. I’m saying this because I really owe you big time. I hurt you, and I’m going to make up for it.”
Disarray shrugged sadly “Too little too late Twi, sorry...I have my own life now. I have my own group of friends, and my own place in the world. We joke around and do crazy things. We see exciting new places. We have our own adventures, just like how you and your friends do. We have our own goals and dreams…” the black drake said, before taking out a small remote and click it. The bomb behind them beeped a few times before shutting down.
“Just for the record” Disarray said “You would have lost”
“How do you figure that?” asked Twilight.
“Well while the Power Ponies could have handled it...and you pretty much did almost exactly what they did in the comic...I don't think Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, or Applejack know how to disarm a bomb. One mistake would have set off all the bombs, and boom, bye bye Power Ponies”
Twilight just stared. How’d she miss such a simple but critical detail.
“Hey, don’t sweat it. You all were really getting into character back there. Now, how about a Harmony Wave to fix this whole mess?” he asked. Twilight nodded and Disarray snapped his claws, teleporting him and Team Harmony out of the comic and back into the real world.
“Hey team, whats up?” greeted the dark drake.
The team in question, Team Chaos, was currently still lounging around the comic, snacks and drinks all around them as the were reading. The Master of Mayhem were trying to avoid their team leader’s eye contact, as to not unintentionally cause an uncomfortable moment by mentioning the conversation had occurred between Ultra-Drum and Matter-Horn near the end.
Maelstrom couldn’t care less and casually said “Was a good read, lots of action, great set up, however the ending was rather sappy and anti-climatic”
Disarray gave his boss a glare, who the chaos entity returned, before the two chuckled and Disarray turned to the others.
“Whoever said reading was boring, obviously never opened a book” Hymn said, pointing out the window “I really wanna learn more about those two big guys” she said, gesturing to Cthulhu and Yog-Sothoth.
“That's the spirit Hymn, one can always expand your horizons with a good book” respond Mael with a smile and nod.
“I wholeheartedly agree. I have sadly gotten behind on my reading, I’ve seen so many interesting characters that I haven’t the slightest idea where they’re from” added Celestia.
Disarray blinked in surprise. “Celestia? What are you doing here?”
“Since this particular ‘prank’ had been going on longer than normal, I came to check up on Twilight and the girls to see if they needed my help”
Disarray shrugged and pointed to the pile of ponies who were currently shaking off some dizziness, and dusting themselves and their normal clothing off. “They seem alright. Shook up, but alright”
Celestia nodded and pulled Disarray into a hug. “I’m proud of you”
“Huh? For what?” replied the drake.
“You had every right to be mad. Furious even. You felt justified in what you were doing, and you had the chance to really hurt Twilight...but in the end you didn’t. You controlled yourself, and that’s something worth praise”
Disarray just smiled sheepishly.
“Aw, I knew he wasn’t going to do it” Maelstrom said, smirking.
“Oh? And how would you know that?” questioned Celestia, raising an eyebrow.
“Simple” they responded, smiling at Disarray who in turned smiled back “I have full trust in my team”
Mael reached out with one of their arms, and brofirsted Disarray. The rest of the team talked about how much fun this prank was, even if it was rather spontaneous and they didn’t have any real part of it. Mael opened a nearby door, ushering their team through “Looks like Team Harmony’s gearing up to blast away our fun, time to go gang”
As the door shut behind them, Team Harmony blasted their Harmony Wave, and everything went back to normal. The girls all said their goodbyes, and then left the castle, going about the rest of their day. Soon it was just Celestia and Twilight. The former looking down motherly at the later.
“Twilight, you do realize this was a wake up call of sorts, right? Disarray is a good drake, you’re lucky he isn’t the vengeful type of this could have gotten really ugly really fast. He’s calmed down now, but wounds like that don’t just heal overnight. You’re going to still need to not only earn his forgiveness, but re-earn his trust as well”
Twilight sighed, ashamed.
“I know, I know. Because of his power, his anger could drive him to do incredibly terrible things. He could become actually evil, and pose a real threat to Equis. I never thought in a million years he’d ever become as powerful as me...”
“Twilight, no!” protested Celestia “You don’t try to earn his forgiveness because he may be a threat. You don’t try to re-earn his trust because he’s as powerful as you. You do it because he’s your little brother and you hurt him. You hurt him for years. But he’s a special kind of soul, he’ll forgive you in time”
Twilight nodded as Celestia spoke up again.
“By the way, and it is vitally important you understand this. He is not as powerful as you. The Masters of Mayhem aren’t as powerful as you. Maelstrom himself isn’t as powerful as you.”
“Huh? But he said…”
“Think Twilight, think. Why do you think I had to team up with Luna every time we faced Discord? We had to fight him at full power on top of using the elements of harmony, and we barely managed to beat him every time. Maelstrom is much much older and much more powerful than Discord. Power that they then transferred and freely share with Disarray and the Masters of Mayhem.
The gears in Twilight’s head came to a dead stop when she finally realized what Celestia was saying. She pailed. “Y-you mean…”
“Oh yes. Team Chaos isn’t as strong as you...they’re way way stronger”
Chapter 12 - Harmony Rangers
Author's Note
Well, it's been a long time coming. And I do so appologize to those who were actually enjoying this story. I wasn't lying when I said I was working on it and that it wasn't dead. It's not, I have a lot of stuff physically written down in notebooks and binders. I'll be working on it more again.
Anywho, I hope you all enjoy this. I'll begin working on the NEXT chapter right away, and hopefully it won't take a whole year to get it out (maybe a week or two, I had been working on it when I should have been working on THIS chapter, so parts of it are done)
Again, hope you like it, leave a comment, I love hearing from you all and will answer any questions you have.
Enjoy the return to chaos.
Chapter 12 - Harmony Rangers
Twilight laid awake in her bed. It had been a couple days since the Living Books prank and like the worst kind of mind worm she just couldn’t get Celestia’s warning out of her head. Disarray being stronger than her? Team Chaos being stronger than Team Harmony? It just didn’t make sense. Chaos stronger than harmony, why it went against the natural order of things! They were the bad guys, she and her friends were the good guys; heroes even! No matter what they did her team always came out on top. No matter the prank or the ill deed, Team Harmony always put things right. That meant they were stronger, didn’t it? She was stronger. They won, time and time again, they won.
The purple princess shifted around, sighing. Her special talent was magic. She was the princess of friendship, a whole genre of magic. A magic that was voided due to Team Chaos also utilizing a kind of ‘friendship’ with their teamwork. She still had her doubts about the prospect of bad guys truly being friends. Every bad guy who became her friend had turned good first after all.
Her thoughts wandered back to Disarray. He was her best friend. Was. She messed that up...and now he’s nowhere to be found. Since their last spat he hadn't even been home, and not mane nor tail was seen of the other Masters of Mayhem. She knew they had to be up to something. She just knew. She always knew.
Just like how she knew Disarray was being angsty, childish, and was just acting out. She had been absolutely dead wrong about that.
What else was she wrong about? What else didn’t she know? What was the bigger picture?
Twilight banged her head against her pillow. It was all just so frustrating! She was stressed and worried, but didn’t know if it was for her brother, or fear from what he might do.
Finally, the alicorn drifted off to sleep, mentally exhausted. Tomorrow is another day, she’ll figure it out tomorrow.
It had been nearly two weeks since the Living Books prank. Deep in the Amarezon rainforest, Daring Doo and her assistant were excavating remnants of a seemingly long lost civilization.
“This find is amazing! Just think about all the knowledge that could be gleaned from these ruins!” proclaimed Daring Do excitedly.
“Yeah! These runes must be at least three thousand years old, maybe older! I'm thinking Pre-Discord era" responded her assistant “What do you suppose that thing is?”
The thing in question was a sarcophagus-like stone box. Across its surface were carved various magical circles along with inlaid jewels that gave off a dull light.
“I don’t know …help me open it!” exclaimed Daring, gesturing over as she tried to push the lid off.
“I don't think that’s the best of ideas…” replied her assistant, the mildly inappropriately named Gutsy Trailblazer.
“Oh come on, where's your sense of adventure?” goaded Daring, already trying to pry open the stone box with a crowbar. “Well, don't just stand there fidgeting Guts, help me!”
“I got a bad feeling about this….” Gutsy responded as she grabbed another crowbar.
The two shoved and pushed and pried the lid, but it didn’t seem to budge. Right as they were about to give up they heard a loud hiss, like air being released from a bottle. The lid was loose!
Daring Doo gave an excited squee and reached to push it off the rest of the way when the duo were blinded by a bright flash of purple light and thrown into the nearby wall as the lid exploded into many pieces. The last thing Gutsy heard before losing consciousness was a group of sinister laughter and an overly dramatic voice proclaiming boldly:
“Ah, after ten thousand years I’m free! It’s time to conquer Equis!”
It had been two and a half weeks since the Living Books prank, and Twilight was enjoying tea over at Sugarcube Corner with Rarity, Fluttershy, and a temporarily on break Pinkie Pie. There had still been no sightings of any members of Team Chaos and Disarray still hadn’t come home. Twilight was worried, really worried, and her friends had hoped that a nice outing with some calming tea would help ease her nerves. It was helping...a little…
“I just don’t know girls, something doesn’t feel right. They’re up to something big! That’s the only reason things would be so quiet. It has to be! That’s why Disarray hasn’t been home, he’s been helping with some really big prank they’re all going to pull!” said Twilight, gulping down her calming tea and pouring another cup.
“Now Twilight, darling, I know you’re worried about Disarray, I’m worried about my little Dissy-wissy too...huh, that doesn’t have the same ring to it as Spikey-Wikey…” replied Rarity, muttering that last part mainly to herself. “It’s not like him to be away for so long. I do miss the days when he would practically be in one of our shadows, but I’m sure he’s fine. He’s probably just still a little upset and went off to vent or something”
None of the girls wanted to tell Twilight what they were really thinking in the far back of their minds. The small thoughts that had been swimming around since that last fiasco. They remembered how angry Disarray had been at Twilight. They all thought it, though none would speak of it for fear of Twilight having a full blown panic attack. ‘What if...Disarray is gone for good? ’
“I...um...I think the quiet is nice…” added Fluttershy, calmly sipping her tea, as one should sip tea. “Maybe they’re just giving us all a break? Because a break from all the chaos would be nice…”
“I think they’re planning us a super huge awesome surprise party!” Pinkie Pie practically screamed
“Of course you would darling” chuckled Rarity. “Though, we are talking about Team Chaos, so it’s not out of the realm of possibilities. They may do it just to trip us up”
“EXACTLY!” screamed Pinkie Pie, jumping up in her seat.
Twilight was about to add her own thoughts of the probability of Team Chaos throwing a surprise party for Team Harmony when the door to Sugarcube Corner burst open, a battered and slightly frantic mare looking around before locking eyes on the booth in the back, running over the purple princess and her friends.
“I’ve found you! I finally found you! Please, I need your help!” screamed the battered up mare.
“What's wrong?? You look like you’ve been through a battle, do you need medical attention!?” asked Twilight, standing up. This was it, she knew it.
“Um...who are you?...if you don’t mind me asking” added Fluttershy.
“My name is Gutsy Trailblazer and I’m the assistant to Daring Do! There’s no time! We need to go now, the monsters are coming!”
“MONSTERS?!” Twilight, Rarity, and Pinkie Pie screamed. Fluttershy just sort of squeaked.
Before Gutsy could respond, the four members of Team Harmony were bathed in a white light and were gone.
“Buh...w-wha …where? But the...the monsters….” Gutsy muttered, looking around frantically before passing out right there in Sugarcube Corner.
After the flash of light faded Twilight and her group, which now included Applejack and Rainbow Dash, found themselves in the throne room of the Canterlot palace. At least, they think it was the throne room. The overall layout was similar but the room itself was very different. The marble pillars that normally lined the walls were replaced with white crystal that glowed with a soft yellow light. The pillars went up and up, to a seemingly enchanted ceiling that showed delightfully cloudy sunrise. Around the room, along the walls, around the pillars, were various consoles and terminals, screens, and buttons that lit up in seemingly random patterns.
It was all so surreal, like something out of a comic book. However, the biggest shock came to them when they all turned their eyes to where the throne was supposed to be. Instead of the tall golden throne of their solar princess there was a pillar of polished glass, and floating in the cylinder was the giant smiling head of
“CELESTIA!” the girls cried out.
“Yes, yes it is I” responded the princess
“What happened to you?!” Twilight practically screamed.
“I can’t really say. I woke up like this almost two and a half weeks ago. I had my assistant Raven cancel all my appointments, and we haven’t been able to conduct day court for obvious reasons. Really, it’s all been rather relaxing, a much needed R&R as it were. The only people who know about this are Raven, Luna of course, a trusted platoon of guards, and now you”
“How can you be so calm?” questioned Twilight, the others still staring in shock, except for Pinkie who was busy pushing buttons on a console and reading the images that were popping up on a nearby screen.
“Well, I’m not in any pain and am really quite comfortable. I originally figured this was just another one of Team Chaos’ games” replied the solar diarch, her face suddenly becoming very serious. “On that note, I have teleported you all here for a super serious reason. There is a new threat to Equestria. Nay, the whole world! It’s super super serious!”
This got all their attention, Rarity speaking up first “Yes, we had a little run in with Gutsy, you know Daring Doo’s assistant? Anywho she-”
“You got to meet Gutsy Trailblazer?!” Rainbow Dash blurted out before stopping herself and turning away with a small blush “I mean, that’s cool, what did she want?”
“As I was about to say before I was so rudely interrupted” Rarity continued with a small ‘hmph’ “The poor dear came in a complete disheveled mess. Was saying something about monsters”
It was at this point Celestia chimed in “Yes. Maelstrom and the Masters of Mayhem have unleashed ancient chaos onto Equestria. You must go and defeat them...as Power Rangers!”
A silence filled the room.
“Power what now?” asked Applejack, raising a brow.
“Power Rangers.” restated Celestia. “An elite team of champions formed to battle the forces of darkness and evil. It’s all very serious! Each of you is an element of harmony, but you have yet to truly tap into the full extent of your powers. It is time to change that!” she proclaimed as a light shot from her horn towards the girls, an ornate medallion appearing around each of their necks”
“These will let us tap into our powers?” questioned Twilight, running a finger gently over the cold metal. This was it, this was the boost she needed, that they all needed.
“Not exactly” responded Celestia “Those medallions are manifestations, created by your power of Harmony. They act as a focus that will allow you to morph into Power Rangers”
“M-morph?” asked Fluttershy.
“You know, Metamorphosis, it means transform” answered Twilight, still staring at the medallion. “My question is how does it work?”
“Yea, just how much about our powers don’t we know about? I need to know just how awesome I am” piped up Rainbow Dash, earning an eye roll from everyone in the room.
Before Celestia could answer any more questions, a guard burst into the room.
“Your highness! We’ve received reports of monsters attacking Ponyville!”
Celestia nodded as best she could without a neck or body and turned to Team Harmony. “Things just got extra super serious! No time for further explanation! Just let go, and go with the flow. The power will know what to do, just trust in it and each other” she said, a white light surrounding the team. “I’m teleporting you back to Ponyville. May the power protect you.”
In a flash of warm white light, they were gone. From behind Celestia’s cylinder a figure moved from where they had been watching in the shadows.
“Did you really have to be so dramatic Tia?” Luna said, still giggling “The look on their faces…”
Celestia couldn’t help it, and started laughing herself. “Maybe I didn’t, but at the same time when else would I have had the opportunity to copy Zordon’s schtick. Oh, I can’t wait to tell him at the next office meeting, it’ll be a laugh. In all...well...seriousness; this will be an important lesson for them, giving them better insight into their powers and abilities and could help turn the tide against chaos and that Maelstrom. I’m telling you Lulu, I don't trust them”
“And that has nothing to do with eating sweets…” Luna responded with a smirk and an eye roll.
“Worse! In this form I’m not able to eat ANYTHING!” Celestia whined. “Granted I don’t get hungry in this form either but it’s the principle of the matter! I don’t know how Zordon did this for thousands of years!”
Luna just giggled at her sister’s expense.
Ponyville was on fire. Now, this wasn’t the first time ponyville had been on fire. Not even the first time that month. Still, it was the first time the fire was caused by a large group of black and purple pony-like beings who looked like they were made out of clay, seemingly had only basic motor functions, and muttered ‘coi’ over and over again under their breath.
Twilight and her team arrived just in time to see Carrot Top’s roof cave into her home, the whole thing collapsing, as a group of these strange putty-like ponies chased the screaming orange maned mare down the street.
“What are those things?!” yelled Rarity.
“Don’t know, but they’re bout ta enter a world o`hurt'' replied Applejack through gritted teeth. Without any hesitation she charged right up and kicked the nearest one...which promptly exploded into purple smoke.
“That was….surprisingly easy…” Twilight observed, expecting these...whatever they were...to put up more resistance. The thing hadn’t even tried to defend itself!
“Yea…” muttered Applejack as she bucked another to the same effect. The ease in which she was dispatching these things had almost taken the wind out of her sails.
“It’s just us being awesome!” cheered Rainbow Dash as she swooped it, double punching two at the same time, both exploding into purple smoke. “You heard the Princess! We’re power-whatevers! We’re just too awesome for these stupid...things.”
“Power Rangers.” corrected Twilight “and maybe you’re right...Princess Celestria did say we’d be unlocking new power levels. Either way, we need to stop these things from destroying the town!”
With that, Team Harmony made quick work of the...things. Even Fluttershy managed to hit one...softly. The thing grabbed it’s chest as if it were having a heart attack, keeled over, and blew up in a cloud of purple smoke.
“Yes! Our new powers rock!” cheered Rainbow Dash when the last of the things had blown up.
“I must say, I do feel rather invigorated” added Rarity, with Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy nodding enthusiastically.
“I don't know...somethin’ still don’t feel right…” muttered Applejack, looking around.
Twilight was too busy looking at her medallion to pay attention to what the others were saying. If this thing really was powering them up, then her theory on their powers would be thrown right out the window. However, the princess hadn’t said it would power them up did she? She had said it would work as a focus, meaning the power had been in them the whole time. Unless that was wrong too?
Twilight groaned, she had so many questions!
She was about to voice her ideas to her friends when the building behind her blew up. “Quills & Sofas! NOOOOOOOOOO!” Twilight screams.
Out of the fire and rubble of what used to be a shop stepped out what the girls could only describe as a monster. It was vaguely pony-shaped and scarecrow-like, but with mannequin parts sticking out randomly. Parts of it seemed crudely sown together from different (and very contradictory according to Rarity) pieces of fabric. It’s clashing colors were so gaudy that it was mildly painful to look at. Without any time to collect themselves the monster shot a beam from a long sewing needle it was brandishing like a wand. The beam hit Team Harmony before they could brace themselves, the grass around them exploding and knocking them back.
“Is everypony ok?” asked Twilight as she asked as she helped Applejack onto her hooves. Whatever that thing had hit them with, they didn’t seem all that worse for wear. Maybe they WERE stronger.
Before Twilight could think more on this, she heard Rarity scream. It was a horrified scream, a scream of pure terror.
“Rarity!” she and the other yelled, whipping around to see their friend laying on the ground, rocking back and forth, clutching her head and whimpering. Her normally very stylish clothes had been replaced with the ugliest outfit any of them had ever seen. Not one bit of it matched, and it was mildly dizzying to look at.
“So….tacky...so...ugly…” Rarity continued to whimper, over and over, dry heaving as she seemed to be resisting the urge to throw up.
The girls looked down at their own and each other’s outfits as well...and then quickly looked away. Their outfits were just as horrible.
The monster laughed, pointing one of its arms at Team Harmony “I will turn ALL the world’s clothes tacky! Oh, what a fun game!”
“You FIEND!!” screamed Rarity, charging at the monster who merely back-handed her to the ground.
“Chaoids!” scream the monster, pointing out its needle-wand at the ground in front of them, more of those black and purple grunts appearing in a poof of smoke “Attack!”
Quickly as they could, Team Harmony leapt to their feet, preparing to fight the coming horde. Before the two sides could clash however, an explosion of black and purple smoke appeared before them. Both Team Harmony and the Chaoids were forced to retreat as the smoke began to clear and four individuals walked out.
“You!” hissed Applejack.
“Me~” replied Bad Seed.
“Disarray!” Twilight and Rarity cried to the caped being standing in the group of arrivals, his back to them with Shadow Blitz and Hymnphonic standing on either side of him..
“Greetings Twilight, Rarity” responded Disarray, glancing over his shoulder at them before turning his attention to the small army of Chaoids in front of him. His eyes scanned the mass of strange beings, before settling on the monster. “Schlockybot, go take a walk. We’ll handle this”
The big tacky monstrosity nodded one of it’s heads and lumbered away, off to cause mischief in the name of Mayhem elsewhere.
“Now, as for you lot. It’s time to get your heads in the game ” Disarray said, finally turning and fully addressing Team Harmony, silently evaluating them before raising a clawed hand. “Chaoids….ATTACK!!”
Before Team Harmony had time to react, the army of grunts charged forward. They clumsily bumped into each other and knocked over anything that was in their way as they made their way to Team Harmony.
“Let’s kick their sorry flanks!” yelled Rainbow Dash, rushing forward, diving right into a mass of the creatures and obliterating them with a fury of punches and kicks.
“Yeehah!” cheered Applejack, also charging into the fray.
While Dash and Applejack took care of the larger clusters on the ground, Twilight had taken to the air, sniping any who strayed too far with a quick magic blast.
“Now wait just a moment-” Rarity began to complain before she was overwhelmed by chaoids “Ow! Ew! Hey, where do you think you’re grabbing!”
“Oh no, Rarity!” Twilight gasped, using her magic to blast away the chaoids surrounding her friend “Are you ok?!” she called down to the white mare.
“They mussed up my hair!” cried Rarity, on her hooves in an instant, fury burning in her eyes “NO ONE TOUCHES A LADY’S HAIR!” she screamed; rushing forward to join Applejack and Rainbow Dash in the fight before getting overrun again by a cluster of chaoids.
About a quarter of a block away, Pinkie Pie was trying to convince Fluttershy to join in the fight with the others, with Fluttershy arguing that she wasn’t a fighter or a soldier and that the chaoids were too scary.
Applejack and Rainbow Dash kicked and punched their way through seemingly endless waves of chaoids, unaware that Disarray himself had his eyes on them. With a deep breath, the dark dragon of chaos opened his mouth and fired a fiery beam of dragon-fire magic aimed in the general direction of the two mares. The beam struck the ground right in front of them and hit them squarely in their chests with a flurry of sparks. The impact to their chests caused them to fly forward as the ground behind them exploded in a giant fireball that neither burned or scorched anything around it.
It didn’t make much sense, but wow did it look dramatic.
“No!” screamed Twilight, swooping low and landing in front of her two fallen teammates and friends. Spreading her wings out to shield them, she turned and glared at Disarray “I won’t let you hurt them!”
“Noble of you Twi” sneered Disarray immoderately. “But your head’s still not in the game, how do you plan on stopping me?”
“With this!” proclaimed Twilight triumphantly, holding out the medallion. “Celestia said it would help unlock new and greater power! Power that is great enough to stop you!”
“And yet here you are, unable to unlock said power. You have no idea how to use that medallion do you?” Disarray responded with a deadpan expression, slightly shaking his head in disappointment. For a moment, his shoulders seemed to sag, and he looked as if all the bravado he showed before had just slipped out of his reach. It was like an actor who realized no one was in the audience; or more actually an actor who realized his co-actor hadn’t remembered their lines. “All that book smarts really doesn’t account for squat when it comes to creativity, ingenuity, and imagination huh?” he muttered, before giving a huff and puffing out his chest “Or could it be that you just aren’t used to dealing with an actually competent villain?” he mocked, with an over dramatic laugh. “Well, what are you waiting for? Come on, hit me!”
Twilight grit her teeth and got herself in what she thought was a good combat stance. After all, she had read various books on self defense and martial arts, it isn’t so hard once you understand the basics. Giving Disarray a determined look she took a step forward, ready to charge him. In a blink the dark drake used his draconic speed to cover the distance, punching Twilight square in the gut and sending her flying. The purple princess flailed dramatically as she sailed through the sky, landing next to her felled friends.
The three shakily got to their hooves as the other three finally joined them. Pinkie Pie had to practically drag Fluttershy. With a smirk Disarray shot another fury black that again landed in front of the group of ponies causing them to fly forwards as the ground behind them exploded in a purple fireball. When they looked up they found themselves in a rock quarry.
“Since when did Ponyville have a rock quarry?!” asked Rainbow Dash, looking around in confusion as she tried to get to her hooves with a groan.
“Bigger Question is how did we even get here!” Twilight added, giving a frustrating grunt as she tried to get to her hooves as well, but found she was too weak and tired and collapsed back into the gravel.. “We were in the middle of town and only fell forward a few hooves. For that matter, how do you get hit in the chest and fall FORWARD?!”
Pinkie Pie was just grumbling something about rock farming and how most of the rocks in the quarry would be the equivalent of weeds.
“Oh Come on Twilight get up, it’s not that hard. You should have more fight in you. Pull it together, get your head in the game, and start playing around” Disarray said, looking down at Twilight, who could only look up and see the shadow of his face.
“You mean stop playing around” corrected Twilight instinctively.
“I said what I meant” replied Disarray “are you even having fun yet?”
Before Twilight could answer Disarray turned away with an exaggerated swoosh of his cape “Come all, we’re leaving, this WEAKLINGS aren’t worth our time!” he declared flamboyantly. “We’ll return to finish them off later”
With a snap of his fingers Disarray, along with the rest of Team Chaos, the chaoids, and monster who had happened to be standing beside Team Chaos, were gone in a fiery flash of purple flames; leaving behind a burned and ruined town and a beaten and bruised Team Harmony.
The team limped back to ponyville, finding out they had been blasted to the outskirts of town and it’d only take a few minutes to get back. Silver linings and all that.
Back in town they took refuge in the surprisingly untouched Sugarcube corner. At least, the building had been untouched.
“I can fix this. I mean, maybe I can salvage some of...this…” muttered Pinkie to herself as she ran her head though her noticeably straighter mane. It seemed that even though the building wasn’t destroyed, the Chaoids had helped themselves to all the baked treats inside, and had gone wild making a mess of all the ingredients in the kitchen and basement. Such a sight has had an instantly negative effect on the party pony, who now was rummaging about to see what was left, using an empty flour sack to save whatever she could.
“It’ll be ok Pinkie…” said Fluttershy softly, stroking the pink mare’s back. Said mare had seemingly given up, plopping into a nearby seat and moped “We’ll stop those meaning and fix all this”
“You think so?” asked Pinkie Pie.
The shy pegasus just gave a small smile and a nod.
“Ya gotta admit, Team Chaos took things a tad far this time” said Applejack, piping up for the first time since they got back from their fight with their sworn enemies. She had been fuming that she had lost so easily, but now she just looked slightly perplexed.
“I know what you mean Applejack, it really doesn’t seem their style to destroy things like this, and on this scale. At least, not without some sort of simple way to fix it” added Rarity.
“I don’t know...they seemed really serious. You really think this is all some sort of prank? Because I know pranks, and this one is a really big prank to pull.” asked Rainbow Dash.
“I have to…” replied Rarity, looking down at her clothes and dry heaving again. “It’s my belief that this is neither serious nor permanent that is keeping me sane. That and I truly don’t think even that Wicked Maelstrom could be so cruel”
“Too cruel…” mutter Pinkie Pie, cleaning up some half eaten chocolate donuts.
“There there….” comforted Fluttershy “It’ll be ok”
Pinkie Pie just shook her head slowly “No, they’re being too cruel. Like, over the top cruel. No, not cruel, they’re being-”
“Mean.” finished Twilight. They’re being overdramatically mean, villainous even. Then there's their nonchalant attitude about all of this. It’s as if it doesn’t matter to them, like it’s all just a game”
From outside they heard a distant explosion followed by the sounds of screaming and running. It seemed Disarray and Team Chaos were back.
“Come on girls, it’s time to move! We’ll put an end to this” said Twilight as she rushed for the door. The others nodded and followed, with Pinkie Pie rushing forward to run next to Twilight.
“I think this is actually a big game,” she said to her friend. “They wouldn’t do all this damage and hurt ponies if there wasn’t an easy way to ‘win’ or ‘lose’ or something. Even when they’re being super duper wacky, it’s still always just a game”
“Come to think of it, I don’t think anypony is actually hurt” added Rainbow Dash from behind them. “Like, there’s a LOT of property damage and stuff got smashed up, but I don’t think anypony was actually hurt during any of it. At least from what I’ve noticed it isn’t anymore more than a bruise or scrape”
“Yea, it don’t seem like they’re being too serious, now that I have some time to cool my head and think on it. They seemed more disappointed and bored than anything” Applejack added, jogging next to Rainbow Dash.
They arrived at the outskirts of town; at the same abandoned rock quarry from before. They stood close, looking around for any sign of Team Chaos. Said team was standing across the quarry from them, striking dramatic villous poses.
“Ah, it’s the power rangers, come to face your doom” said Disarray loudly, giving a flap of his cape and a slightly hopeful look towards Team Harmony. That look deflating to disappointment yet again when they didn’t react like he’d hoped they would.
“Ya, disappointment” sighed Pinkie Pie, standing next to Twilight. “But I’d be really really disappointed too if I’d went through all the trouble of setting up a new game for everyone to play and no one was playing along”
“Game…..game….” Twilight muttered. Team Chaos had been saying that all day. They weren’t taking this at all seriously! This isn’t a game...unless it was. Maybe...no. It couldn’t be that simple…
Twilight thought about all of it; the identical faceless grunts, the over the top mannerisms and crazy convoluted plans, team chaos’ typical wacky antics, even the advice Celestia herself gave her.
Her eyes widened in realization, this WAS just a game. This was all for fun. They get to play over exaggerated, over the top villains, meaning Team Harmony gets to play...gets to play heroes…
The purple princess looked down at the crystal Harmony Medallion, Celestia’s voice echoed in her head. Her incorporeal bodiless teacher had told her to “Just let go, and go with the flow. The power will know what to do”. Twilight looked up and gave Disarray a knowing smirk. The dragon smiled back. She was finally starting to realize!
“Ok girls! Follow my lead!” she said, striking a heroic pose. Pinkie grinned, striking a silly if not also heroic pose next to Twilight. Applejack and Rainbow Dash smirked and struck their own poses. Fluttershy and Rarity just looked confused, but still got into a pose of their own.
“Finally starting to get your head in the game?” asked Disarray as the mares lined up next to each other. “Took you long enough”
Taking her medallion in hand Twilight grinned. “Alright, let’s go! It’s time to turn it on!” she called out.
“Um, turn what on darling?” asked Rarity.
Twilight didn’t respond, she just pointed a finger at Team Chaos who had big grins plastered over their faces. “And let me set the record straight, we’re coming in here to right the wrong.” She said, clutching her medallion. “Fight evil, Ranger Power standing strong. We got it goin on! Harmin Mysto!”
With those two magic words, all six medallions started glowing. Pinkie clutched hers and smiled, picking up where Twilight left off.
“We won’t back down, we're going to set the pace! We’re always on the case, to blast your butts to outer space! Bad colts, bad mares, we see your every move! Power Rangers never lose! Always going to show it through!” She sang.
“Stop! Freeze! Rangers here! There’s no need to fret!” called out Rainbow Dash “We’re the ones that will make a way here to make a change”
“When there’s trouble we don’t quit! Come together to save the day!” chimed in Applejack.
“LET’S GO!” They all cheered together. Twilight glared at Team Chaos as she muttered “It’s morphin time…”
Together, all six hold out their medallions, calling out “Harmonic Source, Friendship Force! Harmin! Mystos! Ranger!” before being engulfed in light. Twilight felt a power swell in her. It was both familiar and something she could only describe as otherworldly.
Starting in her core, she felt the familiar swelling of her element as if she was about to do a normal rainbow wave of harmony, but then it all changed. It seems to ignite her blood, flow through her veins, she felt tingles of power traveling through her nervous system into her brain. Energy shifted and moved across her skin, hard light forming fabric, armor. It swirled around her head, like a helmet, draped behind her along her wings. In that moment she felt more powerful than she had ever felt before.
The light shattered like glass, dissolving into silver dust that swirled around them as they each struck a new pose. Their clothes had transformed into skin-tight armor matching their colors complete with belts of gold and white silk, and a helmet made of crystal with a big heart shaped visor in the center. Their element’s marks were smack in the middle of their chests with the trim bright and golden. Rarity, Pinkie Pie, and Applejack had capes with white inlay while Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Twilight had golden armor along their wings. You could feel the magic and power coming off of them.
“Magically Mighty! Purple Harmony Ranger!”
“Bubbling Laughter! Pink Harmony Ranger!”
“Unwavering Loyalty! Blue Harmony Ranger!”
“Honest Integrity! Orange Harmony Ranger!”
“Gentle Kindness! Yellow Harmony Ranger!”
“Elegantly Generous! White Harmony Ranger!”
With that called out, they struck a group pose, proudly proclaiming “Upholding Harmony through the unlimited magic of Friendship! Yujo Sentai Harmonger!” as the grass behind them exploded into rainbow smoke.
“This is so bucking cool!” screamed Rainbow Dash, taking to the air.
Fluttershy followed close behind “This is for being big meanie-heads!!” she called out, zipping past Dash, bolder than any of them had ever seen her.
“Wait for me!” called out Rainbow Dash. But before she could chase after the yellow pegasus, she was struck by a strong blast of wind which caused her to stumble off course and almost collide with a nearby bolder. Scowling, Rainbow glared at the shadow pegasus who was hovering above her laughing.
“Watch out, you almost wrecked there Rainbow CRASH!” Shadow Blitz cackled mockingly.
“Nopony, and I mean NOPONY, calls me Rainbow Crash and gets away with it!” screamed the cyan element of loyalty.
“Looks like I’ll be the first then. Unless you think you’re going to do something about it?”
“With these powers?!” proclaimed Dash heroically, “There’s no contest! Harmony Slicers!” she called out, glowing rainbow blades extended along her wings. Shadow responded by extending her own dark crystal wingblades.
With a cry, both raced towards each other, the sound of thunder rolling across the sky every time their blade met.
Twilight and Rarity held out their arms “Harmony Saber!” they both said in unison, a long glowing rainbow bladed rapier in each outstretched hand as they rushed Hymnphonic and Disarray. The two Masters of Mayhem brandishing their own swords of black metal, the blades crackling with purple lightning.
Shadow Blitz continued to meet Rainbow Dash blow for blow in the air, Wingblades crashing against Wingblades as they swooped and twisted through the sky; an aerial display for the history books.
Blades clashed as rival fought rival. Applejack and Fluttershy were bucking and punching the crud out of the Chaoids; one with glee and the other with never before seen determination, “Ha! One good buck and they’re down and out”
“Enough!” Disarray yelled suddenly, with a dramatic flip of his cape “You weaklings have proven you aren’t worth our time. We’ll let the Schlockybot take care of them. Come along you lot!” and with another flip of his cape, he disappeared in a burst of flames, the other Master’s of Mayhem following suit.
“Hey get back here you coward!” screamed Rainbow Dash, swooping around to see if she could spot Shadow Blitz.
“Oh dear, I had almost forgotten all about that...thing” muttered Rarity, pointing her sword at the amalgamation lumbering towards them.
Twilight just laughed. “HA! Don’t you see?! This is them giving up, we won! Now, let’s take these monsters out...WITH THE INCREDIBLE POWER OF HARMONY!” she finished with a yell, raising her sword in the air, the blade glowing. The others followed suit as they rushed the monster who was now taking a few cautious steps back.
“Ancient Mystic Power! Harmony Spell Seal!” they all screamed together, slicing in unison at the Schlockybot. Familiar rainbow energy arched from their blades in unison, colliding with the monster who screamed in overdramatic pain and exploded a stupendous multicolored fireball. Team Harmony didn’t see this however, as they had turned a hundred and eighty degrees on their heels and stuck a pose.
A strong wind blew past them as a rainbow wave washed over the land, repairing damages and healing all it touched. Up in Castle Canterlot, the princess of the sun was sitting on her throne again, relieved “it took them long enough” she sighed as a servant brought her a slice of cake “So hungry…” Celestia muttered before taking a large bite...and almost gagging. “It...It still tastes inferior!! Curse you Disarray!!!!”
Back in Ponyville, the six friends and members of Team Harmony sat around a table at Sugarcube Corner enjoying some juice and snacks, compliments of the house for saving the day yet again.
“Wowie! What an adventure!” proclaims Pinkie Pie before stuffing three whole muffins in her mouth.
“You said it partner” agreed Applejack, who calmly sipped her ice tea, a small smile on her face. “Ah don’t right remember the last time ah was able to just let loose like that. Felt nice.”
“Buck ya!” added Rainbow Dash, flexing her arms. “A real brawl! I just wish that wussy Shadow Blitz hadn’t run off like she did. I felt like I could beat her that time!” the cyan pegasus proclaimed bravado. However, her mind was reeling over something that she just couldn’t let go. Something Shadow Blitz had said during their fight. The shadow mare had called her Rainbow Crash. She could assume it was a coincidence due to her actually almost crashing, but the way her sworn rival had put such emphasis on it, almost as if she KNEW it would hurt her. But how could she? Only a handful of ponies even KNOW about the ‘rainbow crash’ incident. The thoughts kept swirling and swirling around Rainbow’s head. She gingerly gave her head a shake, taking a long swig of her milkshake. She could think about it more later, right now it was time to celebrate their victory!
Rarity scoffed at Dash’s use of crass language as she daintily nibbled on a cookie, just glad that order had been restored to the world of fashion.
Fluttershy was busy feeding Angel carrots, who was sitting on her lap and kept glancing around protectively.
Twilight just smiled at her friends. It has been an interesting adventure to be sure, but she was now confident that no matter what Team Chaos came up with, Team Harmony would be able to stop them. Those nagging thoughts in the back of her head that the whole thing was just an elaborate game and that Team Chaos wasn’t actually being serious and WANTED to lose? She’ll just ignore that, it gets easier to do every passing hour. Right now, she’ll focus on the positives. Team Harmony got some new powers. She’s even come up with a name for them; Harmony Power Mode. Yes, everything was looking up. Everything was indeed great. One might say that everything was awesome.
Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter. In the far north beyond the borders of Equestria, surrounded by ice and snow, lay the Crystal Empire. A beacon of light, of peace, and of comfort amidst the cold and dark. No other kingdoms could claim to shine brighter. No other country could boast a greater wealth than that of the empire. Their gem mines ran deep, their waters ran pure. Beauty, music, art, and the passions of craft could be seen everywhere. Outside of Equestrian influence, the church of the Crystal Heart flourished, spreading love far and wide.
Most of the pranks that affected Equestria didn't affect the empire to the north. In fact, the rest of the world remained virtually un-harassed by The Masters of Mayhem. Truthfully, many countries looked upon the mischievousness of the chaos gods and the plight of Equestria as a source of quality entertainment. What little that DID affect the whole world usually resulted in the creation of a new holiday and was usually taken in stride as good fun. In some far off lands there were even rumors saying that Disarray was beginning to be worshiped, but for now those were just rumors.
The Crystal Empire had no worshippers of chaos. Why would they, when their own patron deities are so close and shined so brightly? Empress Mi Amore Cadenza and young Princess Flurry Heart; the physical embodiments of love, and Emperor Shining Armor; the physical embodiment of protection.
Here in the frozen lands, where love reigned supreme, all was well.
Was.
It started as a typical day in the empire. The sun rose over the horizon, making all the crystal spires sparkle and shine. Not only was it one of the most beautiful sights on Equis, it also worked as an alarm clock for everypony...everypony except for the empress who managed to keep dozing anyway. Not even the noise of Shining Armor, or the bustling of maids and castle staff cleaning the room or laying out her outfit for the day, could disturb Cadance of slumber. After over two years of marriage, this fact still amused Shining.
Stepping out of bed, the crowned emperor immediately noticed something was off. His pajamas felt too large, while tight in weird places; such as his chest and hips, and was it his imagination or had he shrunk in the night? He wasn’t sure if he should be freaking out or if he were still asleep and this was some weird disorienting dream.
When he caught a glance of himself in one of the many mirrors around their bed he finally fully awoke with a jolt; instead of a tall muscular stallion he saw a beautiful mare. Said mare looked just like him; except she was smaller than he ought to be, had wide foal-bearing hips, and a rack he would normally drool over. The same rack, in fact, that he saw when he looked down at his own body. Her own body. Shining's reaction was swift as it was obvious; she screamed in fear.
That managed to wake Cadance up.
“Shiny?” she asked in a sleepy, not quite awake, voice. She stared at the being next to her, who was staring back at her with wide fearful eyes. Cadance had to shake her head a few times to make sure she wasn’t dreaming. “Shiny?”
Once recovered from the overall shock of the situation, Shining’s initial fright turned to irritation as she gave an adorable pout.
“Cady, we agreed we’d only do this once and wouldn’t ever talk about it again!” she said, her cute voice attempting to sound harsh and firm but she only managed an adorable whine. Cadance was forced to make a great effort not to giggle and coo at that.
“My love, I swear this time I had nothing to do with this!” Cadance said, still holding in her mirth.
Shining just gave her an unbelieving look, folding her arms under her ample bosom.
“Really! I didn’t!” the pink empress said, giggling “but...we could take advantage of it? Right? As the avatar and patron deity of love, I am open to all sorts of intimacy. So come here, my beautiful mare?”
It was spoken like an invitation, as if the empress were asking, however before Shining Armor (or rather Gleaming Shield) could react, she found herself pinned to the bed on her back, her wife over her, their lips locked.
There was a flash of purple light. The smell of honey and freshly baked cookies. And when they both opened their eyes they were surprised to see Cadance had changed as well. The alicorn of love was now taller and had a new layer of lean muscle. Her face was sharper, yet very androgynous. Gleaming Shield couldn’t help but audibly gulp as just looking at her wife...husband?...caused a heat that throbbed in her very core.
“What the heck?!” the new emperor said in a voice that could swoon a thousand mares.
“Are...um...are you sure you didn’t do this?” asked Gleaming, her eyes greedy soaking every inch of her husband’s body, as Cadance...no...Amore...often slept in the nude.
Emperor Amore stared down at his wife. His eyes were just as full of lustful greed as he memorized every curve. “I am going to melt from such radiant beauty, but I swear I didn’t do this. However, let’s not waste this gift. Beloved, where were we?”
The marriage of the Emperor and Empress (or Empress and Emperor now), was very strong in that sense; the two being the living embodiment of The Lovers; according to the church of the Heart. Her Highness was the manifestation of all love in its rawest, softest, and most pure form, and his Highness was the manifestation of the refined love, hard, and protective. However, due to the effects her vast power had on her physical body, Cadence was practically insatiable. She loved to experiment with all kinds of new things and experience love in as many different ways as possible. Shining of course didn’t complain. As a loving husband and partner to his soulmate, he was always open to experiment along with his wife, and this time would be no different. Emperor Amore’s lips pressed strongly against Gleaming's. Tongues wrestled in a battle Gleaming knew she would lose. As Amore’s hands roamed over the new mare's body every touch seemed to throw more and more fuel on the fire burning in her core. A hand gripped her rear and she let out a moan, louder than any groan or grunt she ever made as a stallion. The sound drove Amore wild.
Just as they were about to start, so close they could feel the heat from each other’s groin, the door opened and a maid walked in. Quickly taking stock of the situation, she bowed an apology and left in haste. After all, every member of the castle staff knew that service to their Majesties means occasionally getting an eyeful of things some may deem highly inappropriate. Nopony dared to complain though. After all, who were they to scorn The Lovers? When their Majesties were in the throes of passion, the whole castle could feel the waves of pure love washing over them, and in turn their own love for their rulers and patron deities grew. That was the way of things, and the maid couldn’t help give a soft smile to herself. She was proud that she was fortunate enough to witness such a scene. She skipped down the hallway, humming a happy tune, determined to do the best she could as thanks for such a gift.
“Talk about killing the mood…” sighed Amore
Gleaming blushed, still feeling Amores' stiffness rubbing against her. “We...have a busy day. Many things to do. But, later we could continue this...I want...no...NEED you inside me...please don’t make me say that again!” the mare whined
Amore sighed but held her close. “I know what you mean, as I desire to make love to you with all the passion and power I can muster. By Celestia’s fat ass! Is this how you stallions feel all the time?! I thought I was horny enough as a mare, but being the embodiment of love AND a stallion?! The fires of passion I feel are ten times worse! My balls ache to empty themselves into you. Every glance at you, every smell, every sound you make. It fills me with such hunger for you. My love, how do you deal with this!? I am about ready to say buck this day, and buck all engagements! Let me buck my wife, dammit!” the pink emperor lamented, again giving a heavy sigh of exasperation.
Gleaming grinned “I had my soulmate at my side, with a hunger just a deep. But please, let me up and change us back. If you don’t, I fear we’ll never leave this bed”
Amore smiled back and nodded “I love you so much, and as much as I want to plow you into the mattress, you’re right.” he said as his horn lit and they both were covered in a pale blue light as Amore attempted to use a spell to put them back in their proper bodies. Nothing happened. He tried again, and this time even Gleaming tried to help, but again and again nothing happened.
“Well, at least I’ll admit that this wasn’t your doing” sighed Gleaming. “Now what?”
Amore shrugged. “Now we must continue on with our day, what else?”
“Wait, what?! I can’t go out like this! I will be the laughing stock of all branches of the guard for months!” cried Gleaming, hopping to her hooves and waving her arms frantically.
Amore couldn’t help but smirk “Do you think this will be a walk in the park for me? The press are going to have a field day. Though, I will admit, I don’t think they will have too much negative to say”
With it decided, they both dressed the best they could, however they found that they had to borrow each other’s clothes and even then Cadence’s old tops were too tight for Gleaming, something Amore was both envious of and promised to thoroughly enjoy later.
Unfortunately for Gleaming Shield, as the thought had slipped her mind, the first pony they saw into was the last Gleaming wanted to run into; their door-guard Flash Sentry.
Said guard was currently on the ground in front of them, nearly completely incapacitated...due to how hard he was laughing.
“It’s not funny Flash!” pouted Gleaming Shield, which only made Flash laugh even harder.
“Ahahahahahahahahahaha!!! Seriously, you’re both like two of my best friends, so I know you both get up to some kinky stuff, but what kinda games were you Cadance playing this time?! You lost a bet or something? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!”
Gleaming continued to pout and give him a tiny kick out of frustration. The effect was immediate. A purple light surrounded the guard and there was the smell of honey and freshly baked cookies as his features changed right before their eyes and his laugh rose in octaves, and slowly died off as the now changed guard rose to her hooves. Flare Warden looked at herself with wide shocked eyes, wincing at her now ill-fitting armor.
“W-W-What the buck?!” she exclaimed, accidentally backing up into a group of guards patrolling the hallways, the same flash of light and change happening to all of them.
Amore raised a brow.
“Now that I think of it, didn’t I change when I touched you?”
Gleaming nodded slowly “My head was swimming when it happened, but yea, it was after you kissed me…”
They both shared a knowing look and nodded.
“I need the castle locked down immediately! No one in, no one out! We need to contain this before it spreads over the entire empire!” ordered Emperor Amore.
“Flash...er...Flare, round up those guards there, divide, and spread the orders around to each gate and entrance. Complete lockdown until we can get a handle on what’s going on” continued Empress Gleaming Shield.
The previous frazzled guards stood at attention best they could, given how uncomfortable in their own armor they looked.
“After we have things locked down, then what?” Asked Flare Warden. “We can’t stay like this forever! I don’t want to be a mare!”
“There is something we are going to do” said Amore “we are going to write to my aunts...if they are even still my aunts...I have a sneaky suspicion the Masters of Mayhem are behind this. When those guards changed, I could detect chaos magic”
Gleaming sighed in exasperation. Of course it was those trouble makers. However, thankfully they had ruined their plans by isolating the castle, so they could afford to be a bit calm about it.
The issue was that the Crystal Empire wasn’t the only nation affected.
At the palace of Canterlot, perched majestically upon the throne of the sun, was Prince Solaris. His long mane flowed with an unseen ethereal breeze and shone with all the colors of the sky. His alabaster fur shone pristine along his tall chiseled body. A body that radiated power and grace. He couldn’t be called anything but flawless. The prince of the sun, lord and ruler of Equestria; a deity in physical form. The mares couldn’t help but swoon, the stallions felt filled with admiration. All who gazed on this figure, clad in naught but a toga and golden regalia, were swept away by his majesty.
Prince Solaris was brooding. He went to bed last night as Princess Celestia, and was now this. Not to mention his sister (who was now his brother) had all but tackled him in a mild panic after their own transformation. Evidently it was something involving her night guard.
Said brother was now entering the throne room, wearing a form-fitting three piece suit. The dark blues and purples matched their fur color immaculately, and their long flowing hair so full of the cosmos added an air of mystery to them. Prince of the night, of the moon, and the stars. Guardian of dreams, and secrets, and mysteries. Like his brother, Prince Artemis radiated power.
“Have you given more thought to our current predicament brother?” asked Artemis
Prince Solaris grumbled annoyed, but nodded. “This is a tricky one. I can say that while I have a very good idea who is behind this, there are aspects of this ‘prank’ still eluding me. All I know is that right after I raised the sun, I heard a scream from right outside my chambers. I immediately went to investigate, finding captain Sharp Steel in the throes of a panic attack. I tried to aid him only to find out that he was now a she. I touched her to calm her, and no sooner had I done so than I became this.
Prince Artemis nodded, looking over to the captain in question. The captain, nodding as well, agreeing with the retelling of recent events.
“I heard similar screams from from the quarters of my own captains. It was from holding back to take in and investigate the scene that I was able to confirm that whatever this is, it is transferred by physical contact. I would have made a retreat and quarantined the area had not a guard stumbled into me in their panic.” said Artemis.
“I have already given the order to quarantine the castle. We must keep this as isolated as possible” replied Solaris, who received a nod from his brother.
Just as they were about to conclude on the matter, they both heard several screams and a din of commotion just outside the throne room doors. This immediately captured both royal sibling’s attention.
After a few more moments, the doors burst open, and the once male cryer who was now wearing an ill fitting uniform called out “Now presenting to their Majesties, Princess Bluebelle!”
Said mare quickly entered the throne room, looking very agitated and scared. Outside the room in the hallways came the panic cries of ponies Bluebelle touched in her race to get to her uncles.
“Aunties...er...Uncles! Something horrible is happening!” cried Bluebelle.
“And you just made it worse you fool!” cried Artemis, looking past his now niece at the guards and servants turned opposite screaming and panicking through the hallways. “What is wrong with you? You’re supposed to be a trained elite soldier! Surely this shouldn’t cause you to panic like that!”
Bluebelle fixed her mane, a gesture she already had while being Blue Blood, but it seemed to fit better with her new self.
“Ahem, well, with all due respect this is an unknown situation we had no prior training or briefing for, even the leader of the secret service is allowed certain leeway when it comes to one’s own mental shock!”
Solaris’ eyes widened and in an instant he was up from his throne, gripping Bluebelle by the shoulders; the poor mare being violently shaken. “What did you just say?!”
“U-uncle! You’re hurting me! This isn’t how you treat a lady!” Bluebelle cried in fear.
Prince Solaris stopped shaking the mare, but didn’t release her. “What did you just say Bluebelle!? Before I grabbed you!”
“That...that even the leader of the secret service is allowed certain leeway?”
Prince Artemis understood almost instantly. “Military leaders!” he cried out.
Solaris nodded and began pacing the throne room. “Dammit Dammit Dammit! I guess Cadance can handle Shining Armor. Hell, those two will probably use it as an excuse to stay in bed all day. However, we have to isolate the Solar Guard, the Lunar Guard, the Secret Service, and the Equestrian Bureau of Investigations in order to try and contain this…”
Artemis froze. “Sis-I mean, Brother! The EBI, Dammit! Their leader lives in the middle of the red district! That means…”
“It’s too late for the city….” Solaris continued.
Bluebelle nodded solemnly in agreement, then added “So...explain to me how I made it worse?”
The Equestrian Bureau of Investigations, or EBI, was a special elite military branch founded by Luna many years before her banishment. It was given the power and authority to investigate any reported crime no matter the rank or social status of the individual, and in turn reported solely to the crown. This was a way to investigate nobles and people in political positions who would abuse their power while being too big to prosecute by the average citizen or local law enforcement, and track down dangerous criminals avoiding the law. Luna had believed that the best way to catch a crook was to think like one, so a lot of the agents of the EBI were reformed criminals given a second chance to use their contacts, information, and expertise of the dark underbelly of society for the betterment of ponykind. It was a very dangerous job and only the best of the best could handle it. It was said, for those in the know, that the EBI was on par with the ESS. Currently, the leader of this elite organization was one of the most resourceful and vicious bounty hunters of the age: the ex-wanted criminal Beatrix Lulamoon; the great and powerful mistress of trickery.
Trixie Lulamoon, now known as Trixster Lulamoon, was currently staring at his body in a full length mirror. “Oh buck oh buck what the buck?! How the buck?! Dammit, what is this?!”
Suddenly, there was a knock at the door, a muffled voice asking “Hey, Trixie? You ok in there? It sounds like somepony else is in there with you”
Still very confused, Trixster walked over to the door, opening it to reveal her two right hands; the twins Flim and Flam.
At first the twins were just as confused, but soon recognized their boss.
“So...trying a new disguise spell, Trixie?” asked Flam.
“Let me guess, Vito Colteone again?” commented Flim.
“I really appreciate the concern, but right now Trixster needs his privacy” Trickster replied, pushing the two of them out of his doorway in exasperation.
The effect was immediate. There was a purple flash, the smell of cookies, and the twins transformed into mares; Shim and Sham, who’s reactions were obvious as they were predictable.
They screamed.
Then they ran. A panicked kind of sprint. The kind where you shove everyone out of your way, in a beeline to get to where you feel secure. It was beautiful, in a chaotic way.
Other ponies immediately shifted, the spell taking effect instantaneously. They in turn screamed and ran, touching more. There are few things on Equis quite like a pony stampede. They are a naturally flighty animal, ponies. That, plus their herding instincts, can cause such glorious chaos when introduced to the right catalysts.
Fortunately for Trixster, years of training and showbiz had tempered his instincts to panic. Instead he just listened to the screams and sounds of stampeding hooves echoing from down the halls with a heavy sigh.
“This….is not good…” he managed to say before he was enveloped in a blue light and teleported straight to Canterlot Castle, right at the hooves of his boss, a male princess Luna. Next to the well dressed prince was a male princess Celestria wearing a toga. Off to the side was a female Blueblood who was visibly flustered and trying to take sly glances at the stallion.
Trixster was curious as to why Blue would be blushing the way she was. Trying to look professional, while still stealing glances at the showpony. It was then he remembered that he was currently only dressed in the gray sweatpants he normally slept in.
The blue stallion nearly had a panic attack about not having a top on until he remembered…he was a stallion now. Who cared if he had a shirt on or not.
Trixster stood to his full height, placed a hand on his hip, and gave Bluebelle a wink before turning to Prince Artemis.
“So, Trixster is correct in assuming he wasn’t singled out for this…gender bender…thing…”
Artemis nodded, “First, let me apologize for the rudely abrupt teleportation, time was of the essence. Secondly, let me confirm your assumption by informing you of what we know thus far; all military leaders in Equestria have swapped sexes. This effect isn’t limited to only military personnel, but can be passed on through touch. Would We be safe in assuming you haven’t touched anypony since your wake?”
Trixster shook his head, sighing “Sorry, but Trixster touched his two seconds in command, Shim and Sham. Well, ‘touch’ is putting it mildly. Trixster was trying to shove them out of his apartment”
Prince Solaris stamped his hove on the ground, leaving small cracks in the marble as he threw his head back and bellowed to the heavens.
“BUCK!”
“Trixter would like to add that they had run away post transformation in a panic” added the blue showpony sheepishly. “They may or may not have also touched a rather large amount of citizens, resulting in more panic. Trixster may or may not have heard the stomping hooves of a panic stampede right before he was teleported…”
The solar prince’s eye twitched.
“Calm, brother” the lunar prince said softly, turning to Trixster “I suppose we can’t find fault in your actions. However, now we must act with even greater urgency. Sky Lancer!”
A young mare in ill-fitting armor appeared and saluted the princes.
“Your orders my lord?”
Artemis nodded “Isolate Canterlot. Complete lock down. No pony in or out. We must stop the spread before it affects all of Equestria!”
Sky nodded and teleported straight to the officers' barracks. “Attention all guards! Orders from the top! We have a situation on our hands! A gender-bending spell is spreading through the city via physical contact. The princes want the guard to lock down Canterlot. Full lockdown. Any questions?”
The officers, who had immediately stood at attention when Sky Lancer teleported in, looked at each other before one raised his hand and gave Sky a cheeky smirk. “While you’re like that, could you give us some advice on how to hit on hot mares like you captain?”
The other officers snickered a bit as Sky Lancer sighed, walked over to the Officer, and placed a finger on his forehead. The effect was immediate; there was a purple flash, the smell of cookies, and a confused mare wearing ill-fitting armor.
“Anypony else think this is a joke?!” Silence. “Well, you have your orders. Canterlot on lockdown. Ready your platoons and MOVE OUT!”
In Ponyville, Twilight awoke early, sleepily walking down the hall to her kitchen when she noticed a black scaled figure walking out of her brother’s old room. “Disarray?! You’re back?!” Twilight asked happily, wiping the sleep out of her eyes. She must still be half asleep because Disarray’s form looked very effeminate.
“Good morning to you too Twi” greeted Disarray cheerfully, her voice sweet and airy, with a hint of draconic growliness, giving it a delightful vibe of mystery. She was rather proud of her new voice. “Yes, I decided to come check on you. See how you were holding up”
Twilight was fully awake now, and stared at the dragoness in front of her. She was stunning, giving Dragon Lord Ember a run for her money in terms of looks…not that Twilight ever thought of Ember that way, or was curious at all about…ANYWAYS. “What did you do Disarray?...”
Disarray giggled and walked past Twilight to the kitchen, a sway in her hips. “Well, we were doing our weekly group training exercises” she began, raising a brow at Twilight’s slightly shocked expression. “What? Doesn’t Team Harmony have team training? Pity. Anywho, Maelstrom was teaching us how to shapeshift our form. It’s one of our many abilities you know. All of a sudden Chimera expresses his curiosity about being a mare. Well then Shadow Blitz wondered if being a stallion was all that different. More questions were asked, some conversations were had, and presto change-o we all decided to spend the day as the opposite gender”
Twilight facepalmed. “So your latest prank is to walk around as a dragoness and confuse ponies?”
“Oh, I didn’t say that~” purred Disarray as she reached out and touched Twilight, transforming instantly. “Do have fun with that, I have to get a move on, the spa is waiting.”
“Wait, wha-” Dusk Shine started to say, but stopped abruptly, surprised by the sound of his own deep voice. “Wait, you can’t leave me like this!”
“Ta-ta~” replied Disarray with a smirk and a wink, disappearing in a flash of purple and green flame.
Dusk Shine sighed, went to the bathroom, and took an aspirin. It was way too early in the morning for this. “I need to find a change of clothes,” he muttered to himself, becoming aware of how uncomfortable his pants were in the front. It also dawned on him that he had yet to complete his morning ritual. Looking down at the bulge in his pants, and taking note of the growing need for a morning piss, he cursed Disarray with every swear he knew.
After doing his typical morning routine, Dusk Shine found himself at a crossroads. On the one hand, he could let this prank play out for a bit longer, as this could provide him valuable intel on the inner workings of the stallion mind. The very thought of acquiring elusive knowledge was very tempting. On the other hand, he wanted to get another win over Team Chaos. This was a pretty tame prank, all things considered.
Thinking about it, Dusk figured it best to let his friends decide. Maybe they’ll leave it for a few days, maybe they’ll choose to end it immediately. Figuring that as fair, he left his castle and made his way to the marketplace. One thing, he thought, that would be interesting to observe would be how the rest of Ponyville was taking this.
Walking into the market square he saw exactly what he expected. A small group of ponies were running around panicking, but the vast majority of ponies around were calmly going about their day. He had to guess that living in Ponyville for so long had made the regular residents rather accepting of the craziness around them.
Walking up to Applejack’s stand, Dusk couldn’t help but admire the chilled farm ponies. It would seem that the two eldest apple siblings had switched clothes, neither quite fitting. Applejack was toned and strong, but nowhere near as big as Big Mac was, so him wearing his older sibling’s shirt, all open and loose…the sweat running down his chest as he heaved those heavy apple crates…
Dusk Shine had to look away and exhale the breath he didn’t realize he was holding.
Big Gala on the other hand, was a bit too big for her siblings' clothes; the daisy dukes and tied off top were hugging every one of her curves in the best possible ways. Dusk Shine began to question if he was, in fact, bisexual.
“Twi? That you? Am ah glad to have run into you! Look at what happened to us!” Applejack said, standing tall. Dusk Shine was definitely looking. “Ah woke up this mornin all buff-like and stallion-fied and figure ‘ooooh wee this is gonna be one of THOSE days’ ya know? So ah go an ask Big Mac if ah can borrow some of his britches cus there ain’t no way ah’m stuffin all of this into mah ol shorts'' Dusk shine had to take out a hanky and remove some sweat from his brow as his eyes moved down to the noticeable bulge in Applejack’s pants. Yea, there was no way the golden farm pony would be able to stuff that into his old shorts…as much as Dusk Shine wanted to see him try.
“So Ah’m grabbin his clothes right? Our hands meet, and poof, Ah gots me a new sister, Big Gala over there” Applejack continued, gesturing over to the very tall, red, muscular, curvy, amarezonian form that was Big Gala. The mare in question heaving a large barrel of apples next to their stall, glancing up at Dusk, who was busy not trying to catch an eye-full of cleavage, and giving a simple “eeyup”.
“Anywho, so we both trade clothes and head down to breakfast. All things considered, this is pretty tame to some of the stuff we all get up to round here…” Applejack continued. Dusk Shine nodded in agreement. “Ah end up touchin Bloom, and Mac…er…Gala, ends up touchin Grammy…and well, now Ah has a lil brother and a granpappy!”
Dusk decided now was the time to chime in. “Yea, it’s another prank from Chaos, Disarray kinda explained it to me. Passed by touch. Come on, lets round up the others”
A sudden shriek from Carrousel Boutique caught their attention, a noticeably baritone shriek.
“We should probably start with Rarity, who knows what kind of mental state she’s in!” Dusk said.
“Right with ya Twi!” Applejack agreed, following behind Alicorn who took off running towards the boutique.
“While I’m like this, call me Dusk. Dusk Shine. I don’t know, it just feels…right” Dusk called back.
Applejack nodded. “That's what Big Gala said, that it just felt right. You can keep callin me Applejack, that still feels right for me.
The two ran right up to Carousel Boutique and right through the front door, expecting to find the worst. What they didn’t expect was to see Rarity…a male Rarity, wearing a white three piece suit, complete with top hat, cane, tails, and the whole nine yards. Said stallion was striking poses in the showroom mirrors, gushing over himself.
“Um…Rarity?” asked Dusk.
“Elusive, darling. Call me…Elusive” the stallion said, turning to face his two friends.
Both Applejack and Dusk Shine felt their heart skip a beat. No stallion should be allowed to be that gorgeous. It wasn’t fair. To call Elusive smooth, or suave, would be selling the stallion short.
“We-uh, we heard ya scream so we thought…” Applejack added, opening and closing his mouth.
“Oh that? Pish Posh, I had just surprised myself. I knew I looked good, but wow do I look GOOD.” Elusive said, doing another turn in the mirror. “I’ve had male models before, and have of course designed various suits and tuxedos; but never have I had the opportunity to take such an…intimate…approach. My mind is absolutely full to bursting with ideas!”
“Well…um…we’re happy for you Elusive…” Dusk stuttered out. As Twilight, he had never been good at talking to handsome stallions, and that trait seemed to carry over at Dusk. “We’re gathering everypony so…”
“Oh do we HAVE to end this one so soon? I would like to get some of my ideas sketched out and experiment a bit, darling” Elusive asked with a pout.
“Well, that's why we’re gathering everypony. So we can vote and see if we want to end it right away.” Dusk added.
Applejack shrugged “I don’t mind one way or the other”
“Really?” asked Dusk. Applejack just nodded and shrugged.
Meanwhile, on the other side of town. Applebuck and Sweetie Beau had caught up with Scooter and the three were on their way to meet up with the rest of their team at the Chaos Regional HQ (aka, the old cutie mark crusaders treehouse) when Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon intercepted them.
“What do you want now?” asked Scooter. “We’re busy”
“To put you in your place once and for all of course” said Diamond smugly “Do you think some boys clothes are going to fool anyone? No, we are going to expose you all as the Masters of Mayhem and-”
Sweetie just rolled his eyes and flicked them both on the nose. The effect was instantaneous.
“I…what?....What is this?! WHAT IS THIS?! I'M A BOY?!?!?! DADDDDDYYYYY!!!!!!”
Mr. Rich came running over, a surprised look on his face.
“Diamond Tiara? Is that you? But…you’re a…a boy? What in the world? How did this happen?”
“They happened!” cried the effeminate coltish stallion wearing capris, a tube top, and a silver diamond encrusted tiara who was pointing a perfectly painted and manicured finger at the trio “They transformed me into a boooooyyyyyyy!!”
Apple Buck approached, holding his hands up. “It was an accident! This is all a new prank from the Masters of Mayhem! You have to be very careful not to touch nopony or the spell will transform you too!”
Filthy Rich stared at the stallion for a second before recognizing Apple Bloom. With an eye roll he nodded, of course it had to be those new lords of chaos.
“I get it.” he said, before running off towards his business, Barnyard Bargains, and returned wearing rubber gloves and a bee keeper’s outfit, before poking his son with the end of a mop handle “Firstly, I’ve always wanted to have a son, but your mom got her tubes tied after you were born. Isn’t this great?! Now, let's get you home to change!”
“...change?” asked Diamond timidly.
“Yes, change. Tiaras are for ladies and twinks, my son. As a stallion, you are going to have to wear something more appropriate. A tie perhaps? Yes, we'll go through my collection of ties for you. Oh, a wonderful idea, your new name shall be Splendor Tie! Anyways, let's move!”
Filthy Rich continued to herd a pouting, whining, crying newly named Splendor Tie back to their mansion as Silver Spoon followed behind silently, shooting angry glares at the trio as they tried their best not to break down laughing.
“So what now?” asked Scootaloo, once the Riches were out of sight.
“What we’d normally do on a day like today?” answered Apple Buck with a shrug.
The other two shrugged as well, and off they went to the local spa, taking a second or two to duck down an alleyway and shift into their chaotic forms. Even while genderbent, their chaotic forms was an unmistakable look.
The three talked down the streets of Ponyville, taking in the reactions the residents had of them. Some, like the flower sisters, screamed and ran in the opposite direction. Some just parted aside, staring on in a mixture of mistrust and disgust. What surprised the trio were the looks of reverence, awe, and even admiration , hidden among the groups of glares and scoffs.
As the trio walked into their destination, the Ponyville spa, they could hear the disgruntled attendants, and the giggling of one chaotic dragoness.
“Give us one good reason we should serve you today after the stunt you pulled?!” Demanded Lichen. Both him and his twin brother were staring at the black scaled dragoness who was currently smirking at the two.
Said dragoness simply materialized a small pile of large gems on the receptionist’s desk, gesturing to it and causing the two attendants to sigh.
“...Ok, fine. What do you want?”
“The usual, Full Package” Disarray responded, before the trio behind her piped in as well.
“We’d like the Full Package as well” said Hymnphonic, wrapping his arm around Disarray’s waist.
The twin brothers shrugged and led the four off to the changing rooms, then the saunas. Disarray wrapped a couple towels around herself and walked down the halls, pondering the mess of things Team Harmony had to be making right now. This was such a simple prank, and she got to have a nice spa day while the whole world was being turned on its head. Lovely.
The draconic goddess of chaos gave her friends a wave and headed into the female sauna. A sauna that was currently occupied by a relaxing Mayor Mare. Said mare who quickly grabbed her towels to cover herself as the dragon walked in, took a seat, and began to stretch herself out.
“Um, excuse me Disarray, this is the LADIES sauna!” Mayor Mare said indignantly, before gawking at Disarray’s body as the dragoness undid her towels and proceeded to lay along the sauna benches.
“And today, I am a lady~” answered the Disarray. “I know many ponies have never seen a dragoness before, but seriously mayor, tis rude to stare”
The mayor quickly turned away with a small blush, giving a few small coughs before turning back and asking “What is your game this time?” with a bit of annoyance.
“This~” answered the dragoness, who reached out and touched the mare’s thigh. The change was instantaneous.
“What the hay?! What did you do to me?!”
“Oh come now Mr. Mayor, it would have happened today sooner or later. Now, to remind you, this is the LADIES sauna” Disarray said, giving the middle aged mayor a shit eating grin.
“What?! But I AM a lady!” the stallion responded.
Disarray ignored the words, directing her attention to the stallion’s body “Oh wow Mr. Mayor, I’m flattered~”
Mayor Mustang looked down to where Disarray was looking. The stallion was sporting a rather impressive erection.
With a shriek of surprise and a face turning beet red, the stallion got up and made a hasty exit to the other sauna.
Back in Canterlot, captain Sky Lancer was working side by side with the lunar guard captains Ebony Ice and Light Parry along with one of the heads of the EBI; Trickster Lulamoon, and the head of the ESS; Bluebelle.
Unfortunately, their best efforts to quarantine Canterlot after the fiasco with Shim and Sham proved in vain as messengers were arriving, reporting gender-bending outbreaks in every major city in Equestria. Really, you couldn’t even blame the twins; but Sky Lancer was going to try.
“All this chaos, because Prince Artemis thought it was a good idea to use criminals for his secret investigations squad!”
“That's the Equestrian Bureau of Investigations, thank you very much! Also, we could have been much faster if you had allowed the EBI and Lunar guard to do our jobs without Solar interference”
“He’s right” agreed Ebony. “No one knows the Red district like Tricker, and us Lunar guards are trained for speed. If you hadn’t insisted on including Solar guards in every squad, we could have had the majority of the city locked down in time”
“Well, it doesn’t matter now” Sky Lancer said dismissively. “From the reports, it seems those insufferable Masters of Mayhem had spread this to every major city in Equestria”
The Solar captain cursed the ‘deities’ of chaos under her breath, clutching the golden sun totem she wore around her neck.
Back in Ponyville, in Sugarcube Corner, an energetic stallion named Bubble Berry bounced through the shop to the bathrooms where he accidentally found Lyra, Bon Bon, and Vinyl Scratch.
“OH! Get out!” “What the buck?!” “Mares Only dude!”
“Upsi! Sorry sorry, I forgot I’m not Pinkie anymore, my mistake!” Bubble Berry apologized before turning away to leave.
“Wait! Pinkie? Pinkie Pie is that you?!” Lyra asked, grabbing the pink stallion by the shoulder “What did you mean…” The effect was immediate.
Bubble Berry bounded away, leaving Vinyl, Bon Bon, and a very confused Harpsi.
“Wha-what the buck?! Bon Bon Im a…a…” the stallion said, hyperventilating.
“Calm down Lyra, hunnybun, calm down…” Bon Bon said encouragingly as Harpsi pressed his side against a wall as he held onto a sink for seemingly dear life, gawking at his reflection in the mirror.
“I can’t…I can’t…Bon Bon…I like STALLIONS now!!” he said, his eyes running over the reflection of his body before turning to his fiancée. “Stallions, Bon Bon, I want them…I want them to…I…I…ARGH!” he groaned.
“I’m not just gonna give up on us, We’ll figure this out” Bon Bon said, reaching out to grab and hold onto her fiance. “We’ll-” the effect was immediate.
The both gazed at each other silently, soaking in the appearance of the other. Finally, Babar broke the silence with a chuckle “See Harpsi? One little touch is all it took…”
They smiled.
They wrapped their arms around each other.
They kissed, passionately.
Vinyl just scratched her head as she looked at her two friends and tried to escape before things got weirder. She was scooting along the wall towards the exit when she grazed against the two as they made out, instantly turning into Vinny Skratch.
“...Da buck?!” Vinny exclaimed, looking himself over before shrugging “Guess I’ll go find Ocavia for…reasons…” he said, leaving the bathroom just as Cup Cake was entertaining.
The blue mare took in the sight; two stallions making out as another watched in the mare's bathroom, and screamed.
“AAHH PERVERTS!”
“Oh, save it, Cup Cake” Vinny groaned, flicking Cup Cake on the forehead and instantly changing her into a stallion.
Up in the skies above Ponyville, Rainbow Blitz was grumbling, curing his bad luck. It all started when he was visiting Fluttershy that morning and had bumped into Derpo as the mail-stallion was making his rounds. Now Rainbow had only one goal, to locate the source of this chaos and punch them in the face!
“Come on Rainbow, this is useless. I think we should go meet up with others” said Butterscotch next to him; even Fluttershy had transformed.
“Yea….yea I think you’re right. Won’t be able to undo this without the others anyways” sighed the blue stallion.
Off they flew to the Castle of Friendship, eyes peeled for any of the Masters of Mayhem. Yet, they didn’t see mane nor tail of them, which was weird.
The Agents of Mayhem, however, were busy relaxing at the Spa. All six members were relaxing in one of the hot tubs.
“Ah, nothing like a good day of chaos and relaxation” sighed Disarray happily.
“You said it!” agreed Bad Seed as he slid a little further into the water.
Hymnphonic didn’t respond, just deciding to be a little bold and moved closer to the dragoness, wrapping one of his arms around her waist. Disarray didn’t seem to mind this, and even leaned against the green haired stallion.
“Oh yea” the dragoness said, addressing the two members who had shown up not fifteen minutes prior. “Did you complete your rounds?”
Party Pop and Chimera grinned in unison.
“Ohhhh yea” giggled Pop “We visited nearly every country and kingdom on Equis. This prank is spread all kinds of far and wide”
The dark scaled dragoness just smiled. “Good. Good.”
In Canterlot, the Princess had assembled all their military leaders in the throne room. The plan to isolate the city to stop the spread had proven futile, as reports were coming in from all major cities in Equestria. Prince Solaris sighed as he stared out of one of the stained glass windows.
“All efforts to contain this have failed. Our only hope lies with elements of harmony now…”
Back in Ponyville, Team Harmony was sitting on their thrones around the Crystal Map. Deep in debate.
“I saw we just zap ourselves back now!” argued Rainbow Blitz.
“Now now, let's not be too hasty” said Elusive as he sketched away on an art pad. “There are so many benefits to consider”
“What benefits!?” Rainbow practically shouted back.
“Seeing things from a different perspective of course. I’ve come up with so many new designs, it would be a shame to stop now darling. ``I vote we wait a bit longer before reversing the prank” the white stallion responded.
“We’ll, ah’m rather indifferent on it” Applejack added, looking at his arm and giving it a few flexes “Mare or stallion, ah’m still me, still strong, so one way or the other, don’t matter. If the majority want it, ah’m gonna go that way”
Bubble bounced in his seat, giggling “Oh yea yea, I know what you mean! I mean, I love being a mare, but when I'm like this, only my butt bounces around when I prance around ooh ooh and I can actually see my hooves when I look down! It's kind of nice. I miss the twins though….” he said, holding his hand up to his chest to cup nonexistent boobs. “I vote to change back now”
Dusk nodded, “That's the majority, Elusive”
“Oh well, I guess I got enough sketches down anyways, let's change it back” the white stallion sighed.
At that moment, Disarray decided to walk into the Map room, her scales shimmering. “Wow what a wonderful day. Nothing beats a good spa day…”
The mane six stared at the dragoness from their thrones, each face showing a bevy of emotions.
Holding up her clawed hands, Disarray smiled “Hey, hey, I just came to give you all some advice for ending this prank. See, the whole world is affected…”
“THE WHOLE WORLD?!” Dusk Shine cut in, strands of his mane starting to stand out in different directions.
“The whole world is affected…” Disarray continued. “So a normal harmony wave won’t cut it. That’s good for fixing Equestria, but isn’t really gonna work globally. Now, you could just leave the rest of the world to it’s fate….or you can produce a Super Wave”
This got team harmony’s attention.
“A what now?” asked Applejack.
“A Super Harmony Wave. It’s simple, you use the castle itself as a conduit. Focus on producing a harmonic wave like normal, but this time, stay on your thrones and focus the energy into the map itself, the castle will do the rest” Disarray explained, heading towards the door.
“And why should we believe anything you say?” Rainbow asked, frowning at the black scaled dragoness.
“Do or don’t, I don’t care. Fire a normal harmony wave, save equestria, forget about the rest of the world. Try and fire a Super Harmony Wave and save everyone across the globe. The choice is yours, I’ve had my fun. Anywho, I have places to be, so I’ll be taking my leave. Tootles~”
And with that, Disarray the dragoness disappeared in a flash of purple and green flames.
Team Harmony stared at each other. One by one each placed their hands on the crystal map table. They nodded to each other, their eyes glowed, the map glowed, the castle glowed.
All will be made right.
It had been two weeks since what had been dubbed “The Great Gender Bender Prank”, and Gleaming Shield was currently praying to the porcelain god. Her, along with a bunch of other ex-males from around the world have found themselves unable to change back, no matter how much harmony magic they were flooded with.
It was a confusing predicament to be sure. Some Equestrian nobles thought it was a grand conspiracy of the Masters of Mayhem to lower Equestra’s already small male population. The real reason was much simpler and fantastic.
Every male who had been changed and who couldn’t change back….was currently pregnant.
Gleaming Shield threw up again as Empress Cadance patted her wife’s back comfortably, holding her hair out of the way for her.
“That’s it love, let it out” she cooed gently.
“I d-don’t remember it being this bad when you had Flurry” groaned Gleaming, giving a few more dry heaves.
“That's because it wasn’t, alicorn physiology and all that” Cadance explained, helping her wife to her hooves and wiping her mouth with some tissue.
In Ponyville, the girls sat in their normal booth, chatting amongst themselves, as the Cakes came over with their orders.
“Now, hun I told you I’m still capable of carrying trays of food”
“I just don’t want you to over excerpt yourself in your condition…”
Pinkie giggled “Thanks for bringing over our orders Mrs. Cake and Mrs. Cake”
“I told you dear, just call me Cup and her Carrot, it’ll be a lot less confusing” the plump blue mare said, her wife giving a chuckle as the ginger-maned mare straightened up with a stretch.
“And if you girls need anything, don’t hesitate to ask” added Carrot Cake.
“I’ll help you carry it out next time” added Pinkie
“Oh, not you too, I told you both, I’m still perfectly capable of carrying things on my own” complained Carrot, with a roll of her eyes.
“For now dear, we’ll see how big you get, and if you’ll be singing a different tune then” added Cup Cake, laying a hand against her wife’s currently flat belly. Carrot smiled, leaned in, and gave her wife a kiss. Their family was growing. Granted, by unconventional means, but the two couldn’t be happier.
That was generally the sentiment globally, according to all the correspondents and ambassadors that Celestia had to deal with.
The Minotaurs saw the event as a minor annoyance, as the bulls turned cows complained about their acquired hefty assets. Over all however, they report the population boom as a net positive. Same could be said for the Yaks. Yakistan declared the “Day of Different Genders” a national holiday, full of feasting and “much frocking, yak style!” to quote the yak ambassador.
The Griffin Empire seemed to have taken very negatively to the prank, and claim the event as “the Equestrian gods interfering and meddling in griffin affairs.” Celestia was quick to send many letters explaining that the Masters of Mayhem, and by extension Maelstrom, were not recognized as official Equestrian deities and aren’t representatives of Equestria and her interests; thus Equestria bears no responsibility for their actions. If she was being honest though, the griffins just liked complaining, and would gripe and complain about being ‘left out’ if they hadn’t been affected.
The biggest shocker came from the dragon lands though. They sent many letters from the various Dragon Lords and even the dragon’s High King himself, praising the prank. The letters wrote of new holidays, celebrations, and feasts held in Disarray’s honor. Never have the dragon lands been so full of eggs. Many dragoness’ were egg-heavy and this was cause for celebration!
Disarray put down the scroll he had been reading. It was from his friend, Dragon Lord Ember. She had written to inform him that Garble and his, now her, crew were all very egg-heavy. She figured Disarray would get a kick out of hearing the fate of his old tormentors. She was right, as the black scaled drake couldn’t hold back his snickering.
All in all, the whole world saw his prank as a positive, and with all that chaos’ influence was growing. There were whispers in the shadow, people were starting to notice. Things were starting to move. Pieces were in place.
Oh yea, it was all coming together.
Chapter 16 - Game Day Part 1
“Thanks for dinner tonight, Dash!” Scootaloo exclaimed as she stretched out on her
couch. A yawn escaped her as she smiled at the cyan pegasus. “It seems we don’t hang out much these days…”
Rainbow Dash smiled back and let herself fall lazily onto the other side of the couch, causing Scootaloo to move her legs quickly.
“Hey! I'm around whenever you need me, Squirt!” Rainbow replied, chuckling sheepishly as the nineteen-year-old mare raised an eyebrow at her. “I guess you’re a bit too old for me to call you Squirt, huh?”
“Yeah, I’d say more than a bit,” the orange mare agreed with a dry chuckle, reaching over to grab a slice of pizza from one of the three stacked boxes nearby.
In truth, Scootaloo had no real desire to spend the afternoon with her ‘idol and adoptive sister.’ She had been wanting to spend some time in the HQ training rooms, practicing her air maneuverability and storm powers. However, the rainbow-maned menace seemed to have different plans. She intercepted the young mare as Scootaloo was walking home from Sugarcube Corner. It had been so long since Scootaloo had just strolled through Ponyville, and she had been enjoying herself until Rainbow Dash “invited” herself over, refusing to take no for an answer. Dash flew off to buy pizza and said, “I’ll meet back up at your place, Squirt!” By Celestia’s saggy tits, Scootaloo hated that nickname.
“You're always so busy nowadays,” Scootaloo began, reaching for another slice. “With your Wonderbolts training and your hero work, I thought you had forgotten about little old me.” Rainbow Dash, for her part, looked a bit guilty at that. “I know, I know. I need to make more time for my little sis, but so much has been going on! Life in the fast lane, you know? Fortunately, everypony was busy today, so I had some free time to hang out with you! Awesome, right?”
Scootaloo let out a dry chuckle and rolled her eyes. “It's all cool, and we aren't sisters,” she said, letting Rainbow know she wasn't truly hurt by it. This was the truth. Rainbow Dash’s obliviousness when it came to taking care of her ‘sister’ gave Scootaloo all the leeway she needed when it came to her chaotic life. Honestly, it was both infuriating and relieving that Rainbow didn’t seem to care much about the smaller pegasus’s daily struggles. Dash only called her ‘sister’ because she ‘unofficially adopted’ Scootaloo back when she was sixteen. At that time, it felt like a dream come true. However, as time went on, the celebrity fog in Scootaloo’s mind began to clear, and she realized that nothing had changed; she was still on her own. Her new ‘big sister’ was just where she always was—flying overhead. Meanwhile, little near-flightless Scootaloo remained where she always was, staring up from under Rainbow’s shadow, desperately trying to keep up.
To make matters worse, Scootaloo discovered that Dash and her friends had assumed she was an orphan. This, of course, wasn't true; her parents were in the military and were frequently deployed, sometimes together. From a young age, she had grown accustomed to her parents leaving for extended periods. During those times, her aunts, who were also in the royal guard and often deployed, would visit and check in on her.
Scootaloo would spend long periods alone, but when her parents returned home, they showered her with affection and shared stories about the world beyond Equestria. There were many occasions when she found herself at home all by herself. Although Scootaloo was fully capable of cooking, cleaning, and managing her household, she often felt very lonely. To ease her loneliness, she would stay over at Applebloom's and Sweetie Belle's houses as much as possible.
These frequent sleepovers led Applejack and Rarity, along with others, to conclude that Scootaloo was an orphan. She never understood why they never reported what they believed to be a teenage orphan living alone in a house, able to buy groceries regularly. However, she later learned that this assumption prompted Rainbow Dash to try to adopt her, making a big show of it in typical Dash fashion.
When the truth came out and Dash realized she couldn't adopt her, she attempted to save face by ‘unofficially adopting’ Scootaloo. Initially, this seemed sweet, and Scootaloo was genuinely touched. However, she soon found out that Rainbow's motivation stemmed primarily from jealousy over Rarity and Applejack’s relationships with their siblings, as well as her own feelings of loneliness as an only child.
Over time, Scootaloo came to understand what Rainbow Dash truly expected from her. Rainbow didn't want a younger sibling to take care of; she wanted a cheerleader to sing her praises. Having observed how her friends' younger siblings looked at them with admiration, Rainbow craved that same adoration. Although Scootaloo might have considered playing that role when she was around ten, it was now too late. The orange pegasus saw Rainbow as nothing more than an ego-driven blowhard who needed to learn some humility.
Scootaloo had also asked Rainbow not to call her "sister" since they weren't related, and it only served to confuse other ponies. However, like much of the information she shared with Rainbow Dash, it seemed to go in one ear and out the other.
“Come on Scoots, I’ll teach ya some of my new Wonderbolts routines!” exclaimed Rainbow Dash, hopping up and speeding out the door. Scootaloo rolled her eyes and followed behind at a slower pace. Her much smaller wings only gave her enough lift to hover just above the ground. This was normal for the duo, Rainbow Dash had taken it upon herself after ‘adopting’ Scootaloo to ‘teach her how to fly properly’. Naturally, this started when Scootaloo was sixteen and had already taught herself how to fly the best she could, given her underdeveloped wings. This was an especially sore subject for Scootaloo. The blue pegasus couldn’t be bothered to teach her when she was younger and couldn’t propel herself off the ground; but after she taught HERSELF how to fly…here comes Rainbow Dash, swooping in and acting like some savior. “Oh, you can finally fly, but I’ma teach you how to REALLY fly!” she’d say. The rainbow maned mare would then proceed to show off trick after trick, most of which Scootaloo had no hope of doing with her small wings. It was just another way for Rainbow to show off. At first Scootaloo felt somewhat hopeful. Then she felt disheartened. Then angry. Then she finally accepted not only who she was, but who Rainbow Dash was; and in her heart
she moved on. Rainbow Dash, in typical Dash fashion, remained oblivious, basking in the perceived admiration of her ‘number one fan’.
So here they were; Scootaloo sitting on a park bench, Rainbow Dash showing off in the air.
“Did you see that last spiral? Pretty wicked, right?” Dash asked as she landed next to the bench and plopped down on it.
“Yeah, it was cool. You got some great hangtime on that last loop, too. I thought you were going to stall for a second there,” Scootaloo replied. In all honesty, she had zoned out and wasn’t paying attention to the impromptu aerial show; her mind was occupied with pranks to play and she was wondering if this is what earth ponies felt like, watching pegasi dance across the sky. Rainbow Dash had always been such a predictable flier that the orange pegasus was just guessing at what she did.
“Ha! Did you see that? Total skill! I’m going to show that one to Spitfire and see if I can add it to the show. The audience loves a good fake-out!” Rainbow boasted. “I hope you were paying attention. I’ve got to make sure my sister is just as cool as I am, after all.”
“Dash, I don’t think I’d be able to do any of that with my wings. I’ve come to terms with that,” Scootaloo replied, her voice calm and measured. “And we aren’t sisters.”
“Adopted sisters are just the same as real sisters, Squirt,” Rainbow responded, closing her eyes and nodding her head as if she had just said something profound.
“You didn’t adopt me,” Scootaloo pointedly said. “I have parents.”
“Yeah, but like, I almost adopted you,” Rainbow shrugged. “That counts.”
“I have parents, Rainbow! Loving parents! They’re just busy!” Scootaloo said, a frown forming on her face. She didn’t like where this conversation was headed.
“Yeah, so busy that they aren’t around!” Rainbow Dash rebutted. “It’s not MY fault that everypony in town thought you were an orphan!”
“Only you and your friends thought that! They’re around plenty! They’re just deployed in the military and have to go on long tours occasionally! They wanted me to move with them, but I wanted to stay here with MY friends! We own our home, and they send me a monthly allowance! I’ve told you that even before you tried to ‘adopt’ me, but you never listened!”
“That’s no excuse to not be around for their kid!” argued Dash.
“You’re still not listening!” Scootaloo cried out, glaring at the pegasus in front of her. Her tone turned cold. “Stop talking bad about my mom and dad! They’re working hard protecting Equestria!”
“So do I!” replied Rainbow Dash haughtily. “Hello! Greatest flier ever? Wonderbolt? Defender of Harmony? Defeater of Chaos? Hero of Equestria? Sound familiar?”
“And you aren’t around either! So just drop it about my parents! I'm proud of my mom and dad! I love them! I’m THEIR daughter, NOT your sister!” the orange mare screamed before turning and sprinting away.
“Squirt! Wait!” cried Rainbow Dash, flying after the distraught pegasus. However, as the blue flier rounded a corner in pursuit of Scootaloo, the mare was nowhere to be seen. “What the buck?” muttered Dash as she looked around. Scootaloo had simply vanished. “Squirt? Squirt?! I didn't mean it like that! I’m sorry you got upset about what I said about your folks!” called out Rainbow as she flew around the town, her eyes scanning for the orange mare.
After flying a few more laps around the town without success, she sighed in frustration. “Bah! I’ll just leave her alone until she cools down. Jeez, she doesn’t need to be so sensitive; I was just trying to make a point…” muttered Rainbow Dash as she circled back, heading towards the Castle of Friendship. “Maybe Twilight needs me for something. The hero's work is never done. I wonder how Scootaloo disappeared like that…”
By the time the blue blur landed in front of the crystal castle, things had taken a turn for the weird. Oh yeah, Twilight was going to need her for something. The world around her was off. She could feel it. Chaos was in the air. She didn’t want to deal with another prank from the Masters of Mayhem but the hero’s work is never done.
Around her, the world warped and changed. Checkered paths sprawled beneath her, giant dice of various shapes and sizes dotted the landscape, and chess pieces were scattered everywhere. Strange contraptions reminiscent of the game 'Mouse Trap' reached skyward. Castles soared into the air, while pipes and slides erupted from the streets, and long ladders stretched up toward the clouds. All sorts of bizarre creatures flew, bounded, and dashed around. It was utter chaos as if Equestria had transformed into a combination of every board game ever created.
Rainbow Dash soared high above, surveying the checkered landscape that resembled a giant board game. In the distance, she spotted Shadow Blitz and Disarray. The dark pegasus lounged on a low-hanging cloud, while the chaotic dragon relaxed on a floating lounge chair behind her. Rainbow Dash wasted no time and flew over to confront them, catching the tail end of their conversation.
“Who does she think she is?!” fumed Shadow Blitz through clenched teeth. “She acts like she’s Celestia’s gift to Ponykind! That egomaniac needs to be brought down a peg or four!”
‘Is there trouble among the team?’ Rainbow thought. ‘I’m assuming she’s talking about the green-haired diva who’s always going after Rarity.’
“Hey now,” soothed Disarray, holding out his claws. “Momentai. This idea of yours is brilliant, so just go wild and let chaos work its magic. You know what you’re going to do, right?”
Shadow Blitz opened her mouth to respond when she spotted Rainbow rocketing towards them. With a smirk she spread her impressive wingspan and pushed herself off the cloud, hovering in the air. “Well well well, what do we have here? Come to stop us by yourself Rainbow Crash? Shouldn’t be a problem for a big strong hero of Equestria right?”
Rainbow was in no mood for games. She frowned at the shadow mare, stopping just a few hooves away, hovering herself. “I am going to wipe that smirk off your face…” she said in a low growl.
“Try it, Crash” Shadow Blitz snapped back darkly.
“It’s DASH!” the cyan flier nearly screamed. “Rainbow Dash! I’ll make sure you don’t forget it!!”
“Sure, whatever, I’ll deal with you later” Blitz responded dismissively before flying away.
“On that note” chimed in Disarray. “This is gonna be a doozy, we put some…effort…into this one. You best go find your friends”
With a flash of purple fire, the chaos dragon was gone too.
Rainbow Dash wanted to scream in frustration but she managed to hold it in. The hero never loses her cool after all. While those two were beyond frustrating, Disarray was right. She needed her friends for this.
With a burst of speed, she was on her way back to the Castle of Friendship. She could already see her friends standing out front, talking to…was that a pair of puppets?
Landing next to Twilight, Applejack, Fluttershy, and Rarity, Rainbow Dash confirmed that yes, her friends were in fact talking to a pair of Punch and Judy puppets.
“Well well,” said the Judy puppet snidely, “The fastest flier is the last to arrive.”
“HEY!” shouted Dash indignantly. She was not about to be insulted by puppets.
“We’re not gonna waste any more of OUR precious time on you bunch! You four can explain it to the slowpoke, we’re out of here!” the Punch puppet said before both disappeared below the children’s puppet booth they had been situated in.
“I..wha…but…HEY!!!” Dash shouted again, angry and confused at being so blatantly insulted.
“Let it go Sugarcube, those things were ruder than a dentist in a candy store. They laid into all of us, ah was ‘bout ready to deck one of ‘em” Applejack said, placing a hand on Rainbow Dash’s shoulder.
“They did explain everything to us though” chimed in Twilight, gesturing to where the path split six ways; at the head of each path was a simple wooden sign with a picture on it. “The Masters of Mayhem have turned the whole world into various board games. We have to follow these paths, one each, and take them on. When we win, we will be able to reunite at the castle and fire a harmony wave to undo this mess!”
“Buck that!” exclaimed Rainbow Dash, balling her hands into fists “Why can’t we just fire one off now?”
“Because, Darling” Rarity said with a sigh, gesturing to one of the paths’ signs; that specific one showing a picture of various candies “Pinkie Pie has already rushed ahead…”
Rainbow Dash swore and sagged her shoulders. Today just wasn’t her day.
“Ah know, ah know, but we got this!” Applejack said with an encouraging grin and giving her friend a playful punch on the arm. “Since Pinkie went and chose that one…ah guess ah’ll take this one over here” She exclaimed, before turning and walking down a path; the sign showing pictures of trees with round red fruits on them.
“I shall be taking that one” piped in Rarity, the sign on her path showing a couple of buildings with money symbols on them.
“I believe this one was made with me in mind…” Twilight added, gesturing to the sign that showed two chess pieces, one in the shape of an alicorn, the other a dragon.
“T-then I guess I’ll…” Fluttershy started to say, softly.
“I’ll take this one!” Rainbow Dash said, interrupting the butter yellow pony, as she marched down a path with a sign depicting the yellow silhouette of a pegasus.
Fluttershy looked around, all alone; her friends had already disappeared from view. “But I was gonna…I mean…I guess I’ll take the last path then….” she said, mostly to herself, as she walked down a path with a sign showing a sailboat, sailing amongst the clouds.
Applejack walked along the dirt path in front of her. To her left and right were huge trees; more beautiful, healthy, and green than any trees back at Sweet Apple Acres. Around the trees were wicker baskets, just like the ones she used back home. On the trees were bright red fruits. However, they weren’t the fruits she had been expecting. No, instead they were…
“Cherries?!” the farm-mare exclaimed, a look of confusion and mild disgust on her face as she glanced from tree to tree.
“You should try some. Some of the best cherries you’ll ever eat!” came a voice above her and to her right. Applejack looked up at a lazily lounging Bad Seed, happily munching on the fruits. In one smooth movement, the mare hopped off of the low branch she was on, dusted herself down, and stood before her rival. “Welcome to Hi-Ho Cherry-O!”
“Hi-Ho what now?” replied Applejack in confusion.
“Hi-Ho Cherry-O '' responded Bad Seed with a genuine smile “Look, it’s simple. When the game starts we both buck the trees to get the cherries to fall into the baskets. Whoever clears the tree wins it, then the tree is marked with a ribbon; orange for you, red for me. Whoever has the most ribbons in the end, wins. See? Simple.”
Bad Seed gave Applejack a grin as the farm-mare eyed the shadow pony up and down. It didn’t seem like Bad Seed was lying or anything, Applejack could tell, but this all seemed too easy. “Ain’t no way you’re beatin me in a buckin 'contest. Ah don’t care what kinda magic powers ya got. So what’s the catch here?”
“Oh yea, there is one thing I forgot to mention…” said Seed “When the game starts, numbers will appear on the trees. You have to buck that exact number of cherries off to win the tree. Mess up and the number resets. Ready to start? Good! Let's get it goin’!”
Before Applejack could respond about how what Bad Seed was proposing was impossible, the shadow mare raised her hand and snapped her fingers.
“Weeeeelllll HOWDY Y’all!! It's time for another game of Hi-Ho Cherry-O! YeeeeeeeeeHAW!” boomed out a thick country voice from everywhere and nowhere. “Now, ah want a nice clean game ya hear! At the sound of the bell, ya’ll get ta buckin’!”
Applejack did a couple of quick crunches to stretch her legs, impossible task or not, no way was she losing to Bad Seed. Next to her brother, she was one of the strongest ponies in Equestria, and no one in the Apple family could boast faster hooves. She had this, she would own this, this would be as easy as pi-
*DING* *WHACK!*
“An’ that there is one tree for Team Red! Quick to the draw, that one. Watch out Team Orange!” came the announcer's voice as Applejack could only blink, staring at the red ribbon tied around the tree in front of her. It had all been so fast she didn’t even see it. She barely got a chance to see the number before the tree was bucked. It was a ten, she was sure of it. She looked down at the basket, and sure enough there were ten cherries in it. She looked up at Bad Seed who gave her a shit-eating grin, winked, and casually walked over to another tree; a big 33 on its trunk.
*WHACK!*
“An’ that's another tree for Team Red!”
Bad Seed didn’t have to start on the same tree Applejack did; she knew this. She knew her sister knew this. There was a bit of satisfaction, she had to admit, in seeing Applejack’s dumbfounded face though. She had been practicing her precision in the HQ’s ChronoGym for the past seven years of her relative time. Becoming Ageless had its perks. It had started as just mild curiosity; she wanted to know if she could. When she found out that yes she had the skills she began honing them. Like a quality blade, she sharpened her precision to a fine edge.
*Whack!*
“Sorry Team Orange, that ain’t right. Gotta try again!”
Applejack grumbled. She bucked the tree like she always did at home. She got every cherry on the tree to fall neatly in the baskets. In any other situation, such a feat would be rather impressive. Not here though. The big 65 on the tree trunk changed to a 23 and bright red cherries quickly grew to replace the ones she’d bucked off.
*WHACK!*
“An’ that’s another tree for Team Red!”
*Whack!* and all the cherries fell.
“Sorry Team Orange, that ain’t right. Gotta try again!”
*Whack!* and again all the cherries fell.
“Sorry Team Orange, that ain’t right. Gotta try again!”
*Whack!*
“Sorry Team Orang-”
“AARRGGHHH!!!!” Screamed Applejack in frustration. If she could glare at the tree in front of her any harder it just might’ve burst into flames.
“Oh, I didn’t think you’d be that bad at this, given what you do every da-er…I mean...Don’t you buck trees for a living? I could give you some pointers if you wanted” said Bad Seed. Applejack was getting more and more frustrated, but she still had enough of her wits about her to know not to give in to Bad Seed’s obvious taunting. The shadow mare calmly walked over to the tree in front of Applejack, eyeing it for a few seconds before giving it a fast kick.
*WHACK!*
“An’ that’s another tree for Team Red!”
“HOW?!” yelled Applejack, turning with a stomp to face Bad Seed. “Yer cheat'n somehow! Ah know you are! How!? Probably using yer chaos magic to make the cherries fall?! Ain’t no way no pony can buck just five cherries off a tree! Admit it ya cheater! This game is rigged!”
Bad Seed frowned, a look of hurt on her face for only a second before she pulled her hat down over her eyes and gave a low sigh “I ain’t no cheater…you just suck.”
“What…did you…say?” Applejack asked slowly, her eyes narrowing dangerously.
“I said you suck!” Bad Seed responded, returning Applejack’s glare. “I’m tired of you always accusing me of cheating. I don’t cheat! I’m no cheater! You. Just. Suck. Sure you’re strong. One of the strongest mares there is. But you got no idea what to do with all the power, do you? Heck, I bet you don’t even realize just how much power you got. You talk high and mighty about being down to earth and humble, but you’re quick to brag about how strong and hard working you are. Well, this game ain’t about being strong! Any idiot can buck a tree hard. This is about precision. Control. Which you got none.”
Applejack was fuming “Ah got ‘enough control to keep myself from tannin’ your hide..”
“You couldn’t even if you wanted to. I'm stronger than you, smarter than you, faster than you” Bad Seed responds “And Ah actually know how to fight”
“Ah know how to fight!! Keep talkin’ and you’ll find that out firsthand!” Applejack yelled back, so angry a vein was beginning to bulge on her forehead.
“Ya know how to tussle. Not fight. Keep on keeping on Applejack, You're gonna buck around and find out just how a chaos god throws down! You can’t even access your harmony powers properly. You don’t even know how they work!” Bad Seed said before taking a few breaths to calm down, taking a few steps back to get some space between the two. A gesture to make it clear that even though she was angry, she didn’t actually want to physically fight. “Look here. I’ll give you a hint,” she continued, calmly. “Being an Element of Harmony boosts all your other magic too” she said, giving the ground a hard stomp.
“That’s three trees for Team Red! Yeehaw!” the announcer's voice called out.
“When you use your earth pony magic to help you control how-” Bad Seed had begun her explanation; however, she was cut off by an increasingly angry Applejack.
“SEE?! YA ADMIT IT! YA ARE USING MAGIC!!!” Yelled Applejack, pointing an accusing finger at the shadow mare.
“Earth pony magic-” Bad Seed tried to explain again, only to quickly move out of the way to avoid a hoof flying at her.
“You low down lyin’, cheatin’, chaos spawn!!!” Applejack cried out as she let fly another kick, followed by a few punches. She was beyond furious. This Element of Harmony would show this cheater what for!
Bad Seed moved out of the way, dodging all of Applejack's attacks. At first, she looked surprised, but now she had a sort of grim acceptance and boredom on her face. “I don’t actually wanna fight you.” she calmly said, dodging another punch.
“Ha! Like ah’d believe that! Yer just sayin that so ah’ll lower mah guard! You were talkin’ all that good buckin’ shit a second ago! Come on then! Ah’ll show you how an Apple settles business!” replied Applejack, throwing kick after kick, punch after punch. Filled to bursting with righteous fury.
“I’m not fighting you!” Bad Seed said firmly, continuing to dodge attack after attack, each one becoming faster and stronger than the last. “Let’s just play the game!”
The cry fell on deaf ears. Applejack was furious beyond reasoning.
The orange mare just couldn’t take it anymore; being bested by this lyin’, cheatin’, whorse over and over again. All her life she was an honest, hard-working mare. Heck, she was THEE Honest hard working mare! So why was she the one coming second fiddle to a mare who didn’t put in any honest work and got her strength and powers from dark chaos magic?! Wasn’t she supposed to be a hero? An element of harmony?! Good was always supposed to triumph over evil, that was the natural order of things right?! This no-good-rotten-to-the-core Bad Seed was a dirty filthy liar and cheater. Her very existence was Dishonest, and if there was one thing Applejack couldn’t tolerate it was dishonesty.
She kept on attacking, getting lost deeper and deeper in her anger. Wanting to prove once and for all who the strongest mare was. However, Bad Seed kept on dodging. Blow after blow, strike after strike, the shadow mare just kept dodging. This only made Applejack angrier, and her attacks became faster, more true, and more powerful.
Suddenly Bad Seed just stopped moving and stood still, looking at Applejack with a face of bored pity.
Something in Applejack snapped.
She could feel it in her core. Harmony magic ignited within her in a way she’d never felt before. The Earth magic within her responded in some sort of resonance, both coming together, swirling and swelling up, flowing through her, filling her to the brim. She felt more powerful than she’d ever felt in her life. She felt indestructible. She was going to win this fight. She was going to wreck this mare. Precision be damned. She was going to show her just how strong and fast she could be. She’d shut her up. She’d shut her up! She’d shut her up!! …Permanently.
She kicked.
Bucking harder than she’d ever bucked anything before.
*CRACK-BOOM!!!*
The resounding bang of a kick breaking the sound barrier reverberated around the cherry orchard. The trees around the two were blown back by the shock wave; some were completely uprooted, and others bent oddly.
The two stared at each other; one in shock and disbelief, the other…calm.
Applejack had been aiming for the mare's head. The realization of what she was willing to do in her fury shocked all the anger out of her. The fact that she could kick with so much power almost scared her. However, the thing that shook her the most…was that Bad Seed had caught her hoof. Just several centimeters from her head, Bad Seed had caught and held her hoof. The shadow mare’s face was calm, but her red eyes showed deep disappointment.
“Sorry Team Orange, that ain’t right. Gotta try again!” the announcer’s voice rang out; the trees around them righting themselves as new cherries began to grow on them.
“...Ya done?” asked Bad Seed flatly. “This prank had nothing to do with you or me. I just wanted to play a game with you. Tease you a little. Maybe teach you a little something I had recently figured out. But no. Your pride couldn’t handle that. No fun’s allowed when Applejack's ego is bruised. You’re almost as bad as Rainbow Dash…”
Seed let go of Applejack’s hoof and the farm-mare lowered it, still wide-eyed. Bad Seed was stronger than her. Truly stronger than her. It's a good thing too, because if she wasn’t then Applejack would have…
The orange mare shuttered.
“A-Ah’m sorry, ah didn’t mean to get so mad…but you were sayin’ all that stuff…and things got out of control…and then…but you were usin’ magic and…” Applejack began, trying to find a justification for how she acted.
“An’ that’s time!!” came the voice of the announcer “Seven to Zero; Team Red Wins! Yeeeeehaaaawww!!! Thanks for playin’ Hi-Ho Cherry-O! Till next time y’all, happy trails!”
A doorway appeared a ways down the path. Bad Seed walked past Applejack.
“It's the same Earth pony magic you have as well, I just wanted to teach you how to…” a sigh “Just cus you don’t understand how to use your power properly, doesn’t make me a cheater…” The shadow mare said calmly, making her way down the path.
“Wait!” called out Applejack. “Can ya…can ya tell me how yer so strong? It can’t all be magic, can it? Ah mean, ah’m supposed to have this Element…this ultimate power…but you’re still so much…more…please, ah don’t understand.”
Bad Seed just stood there, back to Applejack. The orchard was silent, except for the wind blowing through the trees.
After a few more moments, Seed spoke.
“After I got my powers…my powers to match your strength and speed…I didn’t just sit around. I trained every day”
“Ah train every day too!” Applejack cut in before catching herself. “...sorry…”
“Working on the farm every day isn’t really the same as specialized training Applejack” Bad Seed responded. “It’s just exercise; you worked yourself to be strong…and only strong.”
Bad Seed finally turned around, facing Applejack. They stared at each other, rival to rival.
“I didn’t just exercise and train my strength; I pushed myself even further. I decided to take hold of these powers and worked to hone them— to truly own them. It took me a long time, but I dedicated myself to mastering every earth pony fighting style known to ponykind." The shadow mare chuckled softly. "I perfected a few techniques and even invented a couple of new ones along the way. And that's nothing compared to my power over plants…”
The mare turned back around and resumed her walk toward the doorway. “With chaos magic, earth pony magic, strength, speed, and technique, I work hard every day not only to master every skill I possess but also to perfect them and push the boundaries even further by inventing new techniques. I push myself to my limits and then break through them. That’s my way; that’s what my kin taught me. That’s what I believed they upheld.” She whispered, “Honestly, I’m not so sure anymore…”
With that, the mare walked through the doorway and was gone.
Applejack just stood there. Alone. A full minute went past before the orange mare began to slowly make her way down the path as well, through the doorway, back to Equestria; her heart was heavy, and she had a lot on her mind.
The room was breathtaking. A checkered marble floor stretched beneath tall Greco-Roman pillars, with hanging velvet drapes framing the windows. In the center stood a large, ornate mahogany table. On this table was an impressively large chess set—much bigger than any normal chess set. The board had what appeared to be four times the usual number of spaces! From what Twilight could see, it still had the same number of major pieces as a standard chess set but featured a long line of pawns stretching the length of the board. Disarray was already seated at one side of the table, intently eyeing the board, deep in thought. Instead of his usual outfit, he wore a black velvet three-piece suit, complemented by a purple satin shirt with emerald buttons and cufflinks, and a green satin tie that tied the look together. He looked dashing, ever the gentle-stallion, as he gestured to the seat across from him.
Twilight looked down at herself and noticed she was wearing a purple satin dress, feeling the star-diamond-encrusted necklace around her neck and her royal tiara perched on her head. Calmly and gracefully, she walked over, and the chair magically pulled itself out for her. She couldn’t help but give a small, hopeful smile. “Hello… Disarray,” she said softly in greeting. seat across from him.
“Twilight,” he responded.
“Chess?” asked the alicorn.
“It seemed appropriate” responded the dragon, “the leaders of two factions. One a princess and alicorn deity, the other a draconic chaos god. What better game for us to play?”
Twilight couldn’t help but scoff a bit at that. Sure Disarray was powerful, but she wouldn’t go so far as to call him a god. “Do you think you stand a chance against me at chess though?” she asked innocently as she took her seat.
Disarray huffed, a slight frown on his face “You really need to stop looking down on everyone’s intelligence, it’s unbecoming. Yes, we all know you’re smart, but that doesn’t mean you can just throw it in everyone’s faces all the time.”
Twilight stared at the dragon in mild shock at his blunt comment, before responding apologetically. “You’re….right. I’m sorry. I’m just used to always being the smartest pony in the room an-”
“You’re used to THINKING you’re the smartest pony in the room. You have no way of verifying it one way or the other” Disarray corrected, interrupting Twilight. “But, your apology is accepted, on the technicality that this time you ARE the smartest PONY in the room. However! Try not to insult my intelligence again.” The last bit said with a slight glare and more than a little bite. One wouldn’t need to be a genius to understand Disarray was referencing more than this current faux pas.
Twilight flinched a bit “You’re still upset about…before?” she asked hesitantly.
Disarray didn’t respond right away, he just looked down at the board. He looked over his obsidian and gold pieces, and to her polished marble and silver pieces. “It’s your move,” he said after a few seconds.
With a sigh, Twilight moved one of her pawns. “I AM sorry…”
“No you’re not” responded Disarray quietly, moving a pawn of his own. “Not truly"
“How would you know if I’m truly sorry or not?! You have no way of verifying THAT one way or the other,” she responded, throwing his previous statement back at him as she moved another pawn.
Disarray looked up from the board, staring Twilight right in her eyes. She saw so much in them. Nostalgia and familiarity. Intelligence and wisdom. Loneliness. Hurt. Distrust. Acceptance.
“How can you truly be sorry, when you don’t even understand what you’re sorry for?”
One of Disarray’s knights moved on its own, its shape twisting and changing to resemble that of Shadow Blitz.
Twilight was taken aback; by both what Disarray had said and the changing, self-moving piece. She had no real answer to his question. Instead, she decided to silently take her turn. She had begun to reach for her knight when its form changed as well, resembling Rainbow Dash. The piece, just like Disarray’s, moved on its own.
“Hey, wait, I wasn’t going to move that there!” she complained, looking at the dragon. The dark drake only shrugged as he moved another pawn forward two spaces.
“Yeah, sometimes our pieces don’t behave the way we want them to. Some are headstrong, moving ahead on their own. The trick is to observe the situation and determine what moves they CAN make while also understanding them well enough to predict what moves they WILL make. Do you think you can manage that?” he asked as one of his bishops twisted and warped to resemble Party Pop and made its way across the board.
Twilight huffed and reached for one of her rooks. This time, nothing happened as she attempted to move it forward two spaces. “I trust my friends, if that's what you're asking; and they aren’t just pieces in some game.”
Disarray smiled—a sweet, knowing, yet melancholic smile. It was the kind of smile you give to a naive child. “Silly mare, that’s exactly what they are… that’s exactly what we all are…”
Pinkie Pie was in heaven. There was no other explanation for the paradise she found herself in. She was in a thick woodland of gingerbread trees. How did she know they were gingerbread trees? Because she tasted them, of course! Each one had branches heavy with large gummy fruits of all different kinds. The pink party mare happily walked down a multicolored cobblestone path made of rock candy while munching on a huge gummy peach.
“I was wondering when you’d show up!” she said suddenly, as she turned to the pony who appeared beside her, walking in step.
Party Pop giggled, “I was waiting for you. You know where we are, right?”
“CANDYLAND!!!” Pinkie cheered, bouncing up and down with the biggest, most genuine smile she thought she had ever given, threatening to split her face in two. “We’re in Candyland! I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy, never EVER!”
Pop smiled back, nodding enthusiastically, plucking a bonbon off a nearby bush and popping it in her mouth. “There isn’t any game here” she admitted, grabbing a few more before she started to make her way down the path “I mean, how would you even play a life-sized Candyland? Stand around on each stone on the path as someone draws a colored card? Booooring! I figured we could just have fun here until the others finished their game. What do you say?”
“Three words,” replied Pinkie. “Bestest. Day. EVER!!!”
With a laugh, the two continued on their way down the path, only stopping to wave and say hi to Plumpy the plum troll; the green furry caretaker of the gingerbread woods, and Mama Ginger Tree; who insisted they take some sugar plums for their journey.
They talked, joked, and laughed their way into and through the Peppermint Forest, where they stopped to help Mr. Mint chop down some peppermint sticks. He rewarded them with what Pinkie thought was the richest and best hot cocoa she’d ever had.
Pinkie was happy, truly happy. She was living a dream, joyfully prancing through a perfect world of treats and sweets. Not only that but at her side was a pony who could not only keep up with her silly antics but match them. Party Pop understood her better than any pony she’d ever met. It was a shame that they were supposed to be enemies because no one pony ever came so close to being so much like Pinkie Pie
Down the path they marched on, seeing long licorice vines creeping along the peppermint trees.
“Looks like we’re getting close to the Licorice Thicket. We’d better be careful, we don’t want to come across any trouble, or traps, from Lord Licorice”
Pikie was silent, nibbling on a strawberry licorice vine.
“Pinkie?”
“...are you really like me?” asked the pink mare after a few more moments of silence.
“What? What do you mean?” asked Pop.
“I mean…we’re a lot alike. Like, A LOT a lot. I know it’s because you’re my rival and everything…but I don’t get it…are you REALLY like me? Like, were you always like me? Or did Maelstrom MAKE you like me? I mean…this connection I feel towards you. Is it real? Or is it something somepony just…made up?”
The duo stopped and Party Pop stared at her pink counterpart for a few moments before responding “Oh Pinkie Pie…ALL connections are made by someone at some point”
“I know, but I feel like there’s something…deeper, between us. My Pinkie-sense doesn’t work on you! You do all the things I do and more! You seem to understand me better than even my sisters do…” replied Pinkie softly.
“I…understand what you’re trying to ask me…” Party Pop responded slowly, taking Pinkie by the hand and gently leading her down the path toward Licorice Thicket. “To answer it…yes the chaos magic gifted to me plays a very large role in my mood and personality. No, I wasn’t always like this, exactly. There are so many different types of energies constantly swirling around inside of me; it takes my regular…quirkiness?…and cranks the dial up past max. WAY past max. Also no, I’m not REALLY like you…”
“I see…” Pinkie responded, giving a bittersweet smile.
“...You’re like me” finished Pop.
“Wait, what?” the pink mare asked, stopping in her tracks. “I’m pretty sure I’m older than you…”
“You are, that’s not what I meant. I meant…well…let me put it this way, you’re the element of Laughter right?” asked Pop.
“Right?” Pinkie responded questioningly with a lopsided grin.
“Wrong. It’s Joy. The proper label for your element is Joy, not Laughter. It's a mistranslation some pony made thousands of years ago, and now everypony thinks it’s laughter, but no. You are the Element of Joy”
“But..what does that have to do with…”
“Do you feel more compelled to make people laugh, or bring them joy?” asked Pop.
Pinkie had to stop and think about that for a moment. Sure, the desire to bring joy was there, she wanted to bring joy everywhere she went…however…when she really thought about it, one desire was stronger. The desire to see people smile…to hear them laugh.
“...Laughter I guess…but what does that have to do with…”
“And when did you first feel this way?” interrupted Party Pop again, a knowing smile on her face.
“Oh! Back when I first got my cutiemark! I saw a sonic rainboom and it filled me up with so much joy, I couldn’t help but smile! Then I knew what I wanted to do, I wanted to share laughter with everypony everywhere!”
“It filled you with Joy, so you wanted to share Laughter?” Pop asked, that smile never leaving her face.
Pinkie paused again. That couldn’t be right…right? She was filled with JOY…and wanted to spread LAUGHTER…Obviously, that was because they were the same thing. Right? She had always figured they were interchangeable; joy, laughter, happiness, smiles. It all meant the same thing. If that were the case, then why was Party Pop talking as if they were different?
“Let's try looking at it like this; were you like…well…you, back then? The way you are now I mean,” asked Pop.
By this point, they had made it nearly halfway through Licorice Thicket. No sign of Lord Licorice or any of his pets, though they were taking a long way around, keeping away from his castle so they could continue their conversation uninterrupted.
“Haha, oh no. I was a lot like my sisters. Then boom, sonic rainboom, and boom, now I’m the super happy fun loving Pinkie Pie you see today!”
“Exactly! Something else happened to you that day,” said Pop.
Pinkie gave the yellow-haired mare next to her a confused look. “Something else happened?”
“Yeah, for some reason Pinkie Pie…you got Chaos magic in you”
Pinkie opened her mouth to protest but Pop shoved a marshmallow in it and continued talking.
“Think about it. Your pinkie sense, your ability to move around, teleport, and defy all known laws of physics, your deep desire to make people giggle. Pinkie, joy is harmonious, laughter is chaotic. You have a bit of chaos magic in you, and because you’re the element of Joy, the two work in synchronicity, one unable to overpower the other, creating..well…you. Do you understand?”
The pink pony nodded slowly, “But…how am I like you?”
“I’m what you could have been, should have been, if you hadn’t become an element of harmony. Chaos magic grows, Pinkie, it changes and evolves. Even now I can feel my powers shifting and changing. I can feel my very being shifting and changing. I’m like a caterpillar spinning a cocoon, and I have no idea what I will become. Isn’t that exciting?”
“We are both obsessed with celebrations, but for different reasons,” Party Pop continued. “You want to bring joy and laughter, throwing parties to achieve this. I aim to create merriment and happy chaos through celebrations. It may seem similar, but unlike you, I don’t need to hide caches of emergency snacks or party supplies everywhere.”
Pop placed a party hat on Pinkie’s head and added, “I just do what I want. I don’t need charts or folders filled with birthday information or details about a pony’s favorite flavor of ice cream or cupcake.” She then shoved a cupcake into Pinkie’s mouth; it was her secret favorite flavor, just like Grandma Pie used to make. No one had been able to replicate that old recipe—not even Pinkie.
“I just know. Every birthday, every holiday, every celebration—both those celebrated today and those long forgotten—I know them all. Because I can. Because I will. Because I am.”
The two-party ponies continued out of the Licorice Thicket, making their way through the Gumdrop Mountains, pausing to taste some of the tasty candies and to speak with Jolly the Sweet Monster, to whom Pinkie Pie gave a big hug. After filling their pockets with more candy goodies, they continued on their way. The pink party mare had a lot to think about.
Rarity could hardly believe her eyes as she stood before a sprawling city, larger than any she had ever seen. She noticed creative elements reminiscent of Los Pegasus, Canterlot, Manehattan, and even some architecture from Prance. The buildings soared high into the clouds, taller than she had ever imagined. She watched ponies of all types flying around, entering malls, salons, casinos, offices, and more. The city was a forest of colored glass and polished silver steel, surrounded by marble walls, limestone pillars, onyx streets, and crystal lights. Rarity could think of only one word to describe this place.
“Utopia…” she muttered.
“Metropolis,” came a voice from behind her.
She turned quickly and came face to face with Hymnphonic, the green-haired mare, who gave a polite wave.
“The word you’re looking for is Metropolis. It’s far from a Utopia,” Hymn said.
“Hmph! I should have known YOU would be here. So, what game are we playing?” Rarity asked indignantly, raising her nose at her rival.
“Monopoly,” replied Hymn simply, with a smile and a shrug.
This got a laugh out of the purple-haired mare. “HA! I’m sorry, YOU want to take on MOI, a business-mare, in Monopoly of all games?! Dear, I think you're a bit out of your depth.”
Hymn responded with a charming smile. “Humor me. This is the biggest and most complex game of Monopoly you’ll ever play. Listen closely. I’ve teleported every rich, high-class, and noble pony in Equestria into this game, and each has been given replicas of their businesses, along with all sorts of amazing amenities. It’s a wealthy mare’s paradise. The goal? Own everything. Absolutely everything. When you take over a business, by whatever means you deem necessary, it will take on a purple motif. For me, it will be a green motif. The entire idea is to gain control of the whole city.”
Rarity went wide-eyed and looked around her again, streets and streets of business, all sorts of high-class and posh ponies walking around, riding in carts, sitting at cafes, shopping in stores. She could spot ponies she knew from Canterlot, like Lyrica Lilac, Upper Crust, and Jet Set. She was speechless.
“I’ve taken the liberty of making a replica of your Manehatten store here. I also brought you an assistant” Hymn continued, gesturing to the mare who was excitingly running up to the two.
“Hm?” Rarity said before turning around, a smile adorning her face. “Coco? Coco Pommel it IS you!” she said, hugging the mare who immediately began talking at high speed.
“I'm not sure what’s going on,” Coco said, “but business is BOOMING here! Clothes are flying off the shelves almost faster than we can make them, we have orders backed up for weeks! It’s wonderful!”
“Time works differently here. We’ll be able to play out this game for however long it takes and you’ll meet up with the others right as they’re finishing theirs. So Rarity, this is the perfect opportunity for you. Live out your dream. Go crazy.”
Rarity looked at the shadow mare in front of her, hand outstretched. She turned and looked at the cityscape around her, then back at the mare, a sly grin forming on her lips.
“Darling? Game. On.”
Pinkie Pie and Party Pop were sitting outside Grandma Nut’s cottage, sipping sweet tea and eating homemade peanut brittle. Pinkie still had a lot on her mind, making her uncharacteristically quiet. A lot of ponies have asked her how she does what she does, and in truth, she never had an answer for them. Not even she knew how she did half the things she did, it just kinda…made sense to her in some way. But this? This explained so much. Yet, at the same time, she had so many questions. How did she get wacky chaos magic powers? How can she have chaos magic in her and be an Element of Harmony at the same time? Is Party Pop telling the truth? The yellow shadow mare doesn’t have any real reason to lie…but if all she said was true…is Pinkie not Pinkie? She’s Pinkie Pie, party planner extraordinaire, Element of Laughter…or Joy?…
This was all so confusing. Every question led to another question. Every realization spiraled into another. She wanted to jump around, be silly, break out into a song, climb a tree, but no. That was the chaos magic in her talking. She understood that now, but to deny it would be to deny a part of who she was.
Pinkie Pie looked up at the cotton candy-clouded sky. “A part of who I am…” she muttered under her breath. The chaos magic in her kept her from unlocking the true potential of her harmony magic. At the same time, her harmony magic kept the chaos magic from blooming. She wasn’t a true Element, yet she wasn’t a true Chaos entity. She had one hoof on either side and the more she thought on it, the louder a single question became. “...but who am I?”
“Well, I mean, you’re Pinkie Pie” answered Party Pop as she got up from her seat, finishing the last of her sweet iced tea.
“Well yea! But what does that mean!” replied Pinkie Pie dramatically, earning a giggle from Pop.
“Come on you, Candyland has more areas to explore,” Party Pop said, and began walking down the main path.
Pinkie downed the rest of her peanut brittle and rushed after her, a big smile on her face.
“Coming!”
Author's Note
I LIVE!
In all seriousness, I know it's been YEARS, and I know everyone thought this story was dead. It wasn't, it's been sitting on my desk, my bookshelves, on my computer, in various scribbled parts. I've been working on it and other stories bit by bit. Most of it is half-baked, but I'm going to try really hard to focus my ADHD brain and get this DONE.
I have all sorts of plans on where this story is going to go, what adventures they'll have, just have to get to those parts haha.
Thanks for everyone for sticking around and not giving up on me.
The next few chapters should wrap up Age of Chaos (finally, right?)
Thanks again, everyone. Hope you enjoy!
Chapter 17 - Game Day Part 2
War is hell. This fact is universal. While some may find it dramatic to compare actual international conflict to what an observer might consider simple war games, one shy pegasus would argue that referring to the chaos around her as ‘simple war games’ was like calling a tornado ‘a tad windy.’
Fluttershy didn’t know what to expect on her path. The sign only showed a small sailboat. Honestly, if she had been given the chance to choose, she wouldn’t have picked that one at all. Everypony else had made their choices already, leaving that path as the only one remaining. She really should have stayed home today to feed her animals and maybe read a book. Why did she always get roped into these situations? Why her? Had she done something bad in a previous life? Weren’t they all supposed to be playing simple board games?! If she had any idea that this path would lead to such chaos, she would have turned around and run home screaming.
These were some of the thoughts racing through her mind as she ignored another round of insistent knocking, followed by an explosion that shook her small cabin. The yellow pegasus curled tighter into a ball, whimpering in her hiding spot under the bed. Another explosion. Then another. The cabin shook again. War is hell.
“Admiral! Admiral, ma’am, please unbarricade the door! We need you on the bridge, we are taking heavy fire! Admiral!” a voice called from outside her little cabin of safety. More knocking. More explosions. Creaking, the sound of something breaking. Wood splintering. Fluttershy managed a squeak, but sentences, and words, were beyond her. She could only shiver, and whimper. Fear. Her world was fear.
The final path, the game that had been left to her, was Battleship. A full-sized, scaled-up, way-to-realistic aerial version of Battleship. The rules were straightforward; beat Shadow Blitz once. That was it. Blast her out of the sky only once and the game is over, Team Harmony Wins, and they all get to go home. It was a simple objective, but the task was proving itself near impossible for Fluttershy.
The first time the game started, she felt utterly confused. She found herself sitting in an ornate captain's chair on the bridge of the most impressive skyship she had ever seen. Nervous and uncertain, she didn't know what to do. Blitz wasted no time in hunting down and destroying her armada.
In her second attempt, she made a genuine effort, but her tendency to second-guess herself led to disaster; a couple of her ships ended up colliding, and the rest were quickly taken down by Blitz.
During her third attempt, she arranged her armada to fly in close formation for both defense and to appear smaller and less threatening, hoping to pursue a diplomatic solution. However, she soon discovered that her radios could only communicate with ships in her own armada. Additionally, she learned that clustering her ships to appear less intimidating wasn't the best strategy, as it made them easier targets.
Fluttershy soon realized that while her radios could only communicate with one another, Shadow Blitz had no such limitation. The shadow mare would gloat, tease, and taunt her over an open broadcast, mocking and belittling her. However, it seemed that Shadow Blitz was under the impression that she was actually fighting against Rainbow Dash. At first, Fluttershy wanted to fly out and correct her, hoping that it might end the game early, as it wasn’t designed with the shy yellow pegasus in mind. The only thing that originally held her back was the fact that the airspace between the two fleets was an active warzone. If she took to the skies, her chances of dying would rise drastically; even though her death would merely reset the round, the pain felt was very real.
By her eighth and ninth rounds, Fluttershy had begun to get a better grasp on commanding her ships. While she still wasn’t very skilled, she no longer got wiped out immediately. Still, like in the previous rounds, they both ended in fiery explosions—time and time again, round after round.
The terrain beneath them changed from round to round. Sometimes it was a vast forest; other times, it was a desert, open plains, oceans, or tundras. The time of day or night also shifted. Even her crew was randomized, with each round featuring a whole new set of ponies awaiting her orders—and their impending deaths. She understood it was just a game, that these weren’t real ponies, but magical constructs designed to toy with her emotions. With chaos magic, the ships could probably fly themselves at her command; there was no need for each to have a full crew. They existed to amplify the impact of her losses.
Despite knowing all this, the emotional toll was still heavy. After so many rounds, the feeling of loss for so many who were undeniably loyal to her and looked up to her for guidance weighed heavily on her psyche.
Round after round, battle after battle, each one ended the same way: with her death. Then she would wake up in a captain's chair, wearing an admiral's uniform, with a brand new crew staring at her with bright eyes, eagerly awaiting her orders.
Sometimes, the stress became overwhelming, and she would have a major meltdown. This was one of those times. The incessant knocking, the pleading voice, the explosions—it was all too much. After a particularly gruesome defeat in the last round, Fluttershy bolted from her seat and ran to the nearest cabin. It wasn't even her cabin, but that didn't matter. She closed and locked the door, barricaded herself inside, and squeezed under the bunk beds, curling into a ball to try to find a happy place away from it all.
She could take this little break. It didn’t really matter if she lost this round; there would always be another. War—war is hell.
An explosion rocked the ship, followed by another. She heard ponies outside the cabin screaming and smelled smoke and burning fur. Another explosion shook the ship, accompanied by a flash of fire, heat, and pressure. Pain followed, and then there was nothing. War is hell.
Life is bliss. That is what Rarity thought as she enjoyed a delightful brunch with her assistant, Coco Pommel, who had brought along her friend, Madam Shining Gem, and Rarity’s special guest, Lady Pascal Palette. It was another glorious day in the Metropolis, and Rarity entertained her guests with stories of her recent business dealings and acquisitions. Over the past eight years, she had made quite a name for herself. What began as a single dress shop had transformed into a full-fledged enterprise. She had either hired or bought out nearly all her competition, thwarted would-be copycats, and dealt with various crooks and scammers. Rarity essentially owned every fashion shop and boutique, spa, and even every textile mill in the city. It wasn't an exaggeration to say she dominated the industry as a whole. Nicknamed the "Queen of Fashion," Rarity sat proudly upon her self-made throne. The fashionista couldn't be happier; this was everything she had ever wanted and more. Now was the time to expand into other industries, particularly fine dining and the arts. The purpose of today’s brunch was to establish connections and lay the groundwork for her expansion into these new ventures.
“I must say, Lady Belle, when the paperwork for your donation; the funds to construct an entire new wing, was placed on my desk…why I almost thought it was some sort of mistake. Such a large amount…” chortled Lady Pascal Pallette, head director of The Metropolis Galleria And Museum of The Arts.
Rarity gave a dainty smile, “Oh think nothing of it, Lady Pallette. It should come as no surprise that I of all mares would be a firm supporter of the arts.”
“Please, call me Pascal, dear.”
“Only if you call me Rarity, darling.”
“It's a deal. I thank you again for inviting me out for brunch. If I’m honest, I’ve been stuck in my office far too much since being brought here to this…city.” Pascal tittered, a playful smirk on her face “Well, ‘stuck’ isn’t the right word. I just haven’t wanted to leave! Being here, in this ‘Metropolis’, has made my work ever so much more enjoyable!”
The two giggled and continued their brunch. Idle chatter, a compliment or two, and light talk of business filled the air. Another perfect day in Rarity’s perfect world.
“I must ask darling,” inquired Rarity as she sipped her mimosa, “What is that wonderful fragrance you’re wearing? It smells simply divine”
Pascal giggled “Oh you noticed? An acquaintance got it for me from this little shop not, oh, five or so blocks from here if I remember correctly.”
“Five or so blocks…wait, you don’t mean THAT shop do you?” Shining Gem interrupted, nervously.
“Oh, ‘that shop’ hmm? You knew about this lovely perfume and kept it all to yourself? For shame Gem!” Coco joked as Rarity got up from the table with a smile “Well darlings, it's worth checking out. If I like all their wares, maybe I’ll go and buy it...the shop, I mean” she giggled.
“That might be a bit difficult…” Gem muttered under her breath as she got up and followed her friend. Rarity called for a carriage, and soon the four of them were on their way. As they traveled, Rarity and Pascal continued to chat, with Coco occasionally joining and leaving the conversation to discuss gala scheduling and upcoming clothing lines. Noticing her friend’s odd silence, Coco turned to the fourth mare in the carriage.
“Everything ok?” she asked, raising a brow at her friend’s odd behavior.
“Hm?” squeaked a startled Gem. “Oh, yes, I’m just fine! I just need to tell you som-”
“We’re here!” interrupted Pascal as the carriage stopped in front of the perfume shop.
The green perfume shop.
“Well, I’ll be…” mutters Rarity.
“I’m sorry I didn’t say anything about it before, I just didn’t want you to freak or anything…” Gem said quickly to Coco; the mare was already getting out of the carriage to follow Rarity who herself was already ahead, getting a good look at the shop.
The alabaster fashionista quickly realized that the shop itself was rather small, resembling more of a walk-in kiosk than an actual store. The upper portion of the building was actually a giant three-sided billboard, with images that were enchanted to light up, move, and even play audio. It was truly revolutionary! A single advertisement played on repeat, featuring the silhouette of Hymnphonic sitting on a jade throne, both sexy and powerful. Her voice, as angelic and otherworldly as always, rang out loud and clear as crystalized emerald letters spelled out:
“All you’ll ever know is life upon the throne
Don't settle for ‘Middle’ or ‘Little’
You want; MORE”
A fragrance by Hymnphonic
Even Rarity has to admit, the presentation was top-notch and grand. However, it was a single green building in a sea of white, silver, and amethyst. The line might be an issue though. It stretched down the block, around the corner, and out of sight.
“Oh dear…” muttered Coco, covering her mouth at the sight of the line “This might be a problem…”
“...Pish posh darling” dismissed Rarity. “This is the first shop of hers I’ve seen. It’s been, what? Nearly a decade? It's an impressive display, I will give her that. But look at it, it sells only one product. It took her eight years to do this? No, once this fad ends and her perfume is yesterday’s news her business will crash. Like I said, darling, she’s no threat.”
“If you’re sure Miss Rarity…what if there are more shops?” asked Coco.
Rarity paused for a second before turning and smiling at her special guest. “Pascal, darling. You haven’t seen any other green-themed businesses around, have you?”
“Oh no, I haven’t seen any green businesses, and I only know about this one through a colleague. From what I understand, it’s only been open for a week or so” the pascal colored mare responded.
“Well, there you go!” Rarity exclaimed. Coco smiled hopefully. Shining Gem looked away.
“What’s wrong?” Rarity asked, noticing Gem’s reaction. “Why the look?”
“I…I think it’d be easier to just show you…” responded Gem.
“Oh, if you are to be galavanting off on an adventure I think I shall take the opportunity to excuse myself. I’ve been away from my office for a while and there’s always some work to do, ta-ta!” Pascal said as she called for another carriage. “We’ll have to do this again sometime.”
“Of course, of course” responded Rarity, giving Lady Pascal one final wave to see her off before returning to her own carriage. “Where to?” she asked Gem before looking back out the window “Coming Coco?”
"I'm afraid I really need to head back to our office. Remember how we've been having some trouble securing materials for our textile mills lately? Their output is down by 20%, which is quite concerning because it means we don’t have as much fabric as we normally would. I’ve managed to postpone all the production orders, but we need to get to the bottom of why this is happening. I'm going to buckle down and review all the shipping paperwork again with Bean Counter from accounting. Do you remember her? She’s the one who came to you with that pantsuit idea. Anyway, I think there might be something I missed."
Gem gave her friend a panicked look “I thought you were gonna come with me!”
“It’ll be fine, Gem. Miss Rarity will look out for you. Until next time!” Coco responded with a wave as the carriage took off. The trip was quiet for a while, with Rarity staring out the window, lost in thought, and Gem nervously trying not to gawk at Rarity. Gem had always admired the mare, one of the heroes of Equestria. Learning that her childhood friend was working for Rarity? That was amazing news! She had nearly lost her mind when Coco invited her out, saying it was a special brunch with her boss. Now she was sitting alone in a carriage with her idol. It should have been a dream come true, yet she felt incredibly nervous.
Rarity continued to gaze out the window. They were passing through areas of Metropolis she had never visited before. The city was larger than she had realized. The architecture adhered to a general theme, but each area had its own unique fingerprint, making it feel fresh and new. The sight that brought a smile to her face, however, was the sea of white and silver buildings, occasionally broken up by splashes of purple.
“This is why you invest in chain establishments,” Rarity proclaimed, and the mare across from her nodded in agreement. That mare also brought a smile to her face. Naturally, Lady Rarity Belle, socialite supreme, could easily spot a nervous, starstruck fan.
Her pleasant mood was abruptly interrupted by a single green building. Then another. A few more here. A whole block of them there. Rarity’s eye twitched a little, as her smile slowly dropped. Gem looked even more nervous and miserable as the carriage passed more and more green buildings until there was nothing but emerald as far as the eye could see.
“I…what…but…my word darling, is this what you wanted to show me? You were right to bring me here, I don’t think I would have believed you if you’d just told me” Rarity huffed out, falling back in her carriage seat, a bit of nervous sweat on her brow. “I don't see a single unclaimed building out there…”
Gem shook her head, giving a sad sigh. Not like this. She didn’t want to meet her idol only to have to disappoint her so horribly.
“There’s more?!” exclaimed Rarity with a gasp “That is to say, there is something worse than all of this??”
Gem nodded and pointed out of the window as the carriage went by a large beautiful crystal sign proclaiming: Welcome to the Emerald City!
“The…Emerald City? What is that, some sort of mall?” Rarity asked as the carriage pulled alongside other carriages, parking outside a large set of doors.
“No, it’s so much more…” said Gem wistfully as they climbed out and gazed at the bright inviting entrance. Large doors opened themselves as they approached, revealing a foyer that left Rarity absolutely speechless. A staff member walked up to the duo, greeting the two. “Welcome back to the Emerald City Madame Shining Gem. Your private suite is ready and the staff is at your beck and call. Your usual amenities have been queued, and as always, if you need anything, anything at all, all you need to do is ask”
Gem looked at Rarity, giving an apologetic smile “You’re…not upset? Please don’t be upset. I idolize you, Lady Rarity! I’ve been your biggest fan since your fight with Nightmare Moon! I’ve bought so many of your dresses…I didn’t want to not support you…I spent my money at all of your shops…but this place, it's just too amazing! A friend brought me here, and it was like I never knew what true bliss was before coming here. It is otherworldly amazing!”
Rarity didn’t know how to respond. Gently, Gem took Rarity’s hand, the staff around them ushering them on “Give it a try. Please. You’ll see what I mean”
“The spa is ready for you ma’am,” an approaching butler said, bowing “we took the liberty of adding your plus one to your itinerary” he continued before turning to Rarity “however, if there is anything at all that catches your fancy, simply let us know. We pride ourselves on our service.”
“Well, indulging a little wouldn’t hurt…” Rarity replied, letting Gem and the staff lead her off.
That had been four days ago—four of the best days in Rarity’s life. She was amazed by all the amenities and services that this incredible place offered. There were themed resorts, luxury hotels, spas, theme parks, water parks, zoos, massive aquariums, malls, casinos, restaurants, gyms, cinemas, opera houses, office spaces, indoor racing tracks, arcades, and every luxury one could desire. Rarity had never been in a building so vast; it was a massive complex the size of a city. A beacon of wealth, even the windows were made of pure emerald, lined with gold trim.
It was all so immaculate, so wondrous, and so perfect. However, a nagging thought kept spinning in the back of her mind: how had she not heard of this place before? Everywhere she went, it was busy. The wealthy were living it up in extreme luxury here, indulging to a completely ludicrous degree. Parties were happening around the clock, and festivities never seemed to end. There were free buffets and open bars. She couldn’t believe she had spent three years without knowing about this place.
Rarity pondered as she strolled through one of the malls, with Gem by her side and several bags being carried by attentive staff members. She couldn’t help but smirk at the sight; nearly all of the clothing stores were stocked with brands she owned. While Hymnphonic had built the mall, Rarity found amusement in the fact that she still profited from it.
Suddenly, she heard someone calling her name and turned to see a butler approaching, bowing respectfully. “My apologies, Lady Rarity, but Her Excellence, Hymnphonic, has requested your presence in her office. She wishes to speak with you.”
“‘Her Excellence’? Ugh, she probably just wants to gloat, but fine, lead the way,” the fashionista replied, turning to bid farewell to Gem and thanking the staff for carrying her bags, informing them where to have the contents delivered.
Following the butler, they exited the mall and surprisingly headed towards one of the casinos. After navigating through several elevators, they finally arrived at the open doorway of an ornate waiting room. Greeting them at the door was a familiar silver-maned mare in a cute blouse and pencil skirt. Rarity recognized her; she had been in Sweetie Belle’s class—Silver something..
Silver Spoon politely bowed and gestured for her to head inside “This way, please. It will only be a moment”
The butler quietly excused himself as Rarity entered the cozy room. A fireplace flickered warmly, surrounded by comfortable couches. On a table in the center, a variety of snacks and a delicate tea set were arranged. Against the far wall stood what Rarity assumed was a reception desk. Behind it were a pair of large emerald, jade, and gold doors that were impossibly ornate—beautiful yet mysterious. The mesmerizing design drew her in, and she had to force herself to look away after realizing she had been staring.
“This room is simply lovely. Excuse me, darling, this might sound a bit rude, but I believe you were in my younger sister’s class. May I have your name?”
At the mention of Rarity's sister, Silver Spoon flinched. She seemed to carry an air of nervousness, like a small animal in the territory of an apex predator or an ant aware of a magnifying glass focused on it.
“Y-yes Lady Rarity. My name is Silver Spoon. I went to school with, uh, Sweetie Belle. It shouldn’t be too much longer ma’am, Hymnphonic’s…eh…personal assistant…will be out shortly to escort you”
Rarity nodded and sat down with a hot cup of tea. It was only a few minutes before the beautiful ornate doors opened, revealing Diamond Tiara. The pink mare was dressed in a Greco-Roman dress, looking every bit the part of a lady-in-waiting.
“Her Excellency will see you now,” Diamond huffed haughtily, a smirk of anticipation on her face.
“It's wonderful of her not to keep a lady waiting,” Rarity replied as she followed Diamond into the massive throne room.
Rarity found herself at a loss for words. The throne room was elegant and glorious beyond measure. Large crystal columns supported a ceiling adorned with jade and gold. The floor featured a stunning tiled mosaic of greens, arranged in intricate, swirling patterns. There were no walls, only railings that allowed one to gaze over the expansive Metropolis surrounding them. The wind was warm and perfect. Rarity gawked, openly astonished, as she finally comprehended her location. She stood in the tallest room of a tower that dwarfed all others—the tallest tower in all of Metropolis. At that moment, she realized she stood at the top of this world.
Before her, seated on a crystal throne, was Hymnphonic. Her presence radiated power and beauty, bathed in a golden light, with her hair flowing in a magical breeze. She gracefully rose from her throne, wearing a form-fitting gown made of silk and dragon scales. Each step across the floor caused the patterns to ripple, making it look as though she was walking across an emerald sea as she approached the center of the room, gesturing for Rarity to come closer.
“You’ve searched for ‘it’ at every stop, and you’ve climbed so high; now you’re at the top,” Hymn sang softly. “Yet here I am, here I was, and here I will forever be.”
“I knew you called me here to gloat,” Rarity attempted to say.
“Did you like my Emerald City?” Hymn interrupted.
“What?” Rarity replied in surprise.
“My Emerald City. Did you like it? You did, didn’t you? It’s perfect after all. Do you know why?” Hymn asked.
“...Oh, is this where I get to talk? You probably used your hypnosis powers to force everyone here to work for you. Normally, I’d say that’s cheating; however, you stated that we were allowed to use any means at our disposal to achieve a monopoly over Metropolis. So while your methods are... uncouth, you haven’t broken any rules.” Rarity replied with a sigh. “You’re probably using your hypnosis powers to keep people inside your ‘Emerald City’ as well.”
Hymn laughed, a regal, melodious laugh. “Oh, it is nothing that complicated or over the top. It’s perfect simply because I declared it to be so. If I say it must be, then it must be,” she said as she led Rarity to the railing, gesturing out over the city.
It was a beauty to behold in its entirety. From this height, even the clouds were below them. On those clouds was an even larger expanse of the sprawling metropolis. Luxury was built upon luxury, floating above more luxury. Spread across this urban sea were many patches of green and purple, moving and shifting as businesses were bought and lost, expanded and sold. Goods and money changed hands; stocks rose and fell. Green, then purple, then back to green, and vice versa. It was an intricate dance.
Rarity could only stare and watch the beautiful interplay of colors play out before her eyes. She was snapped out of her trance by the snap of Hymn's fingers. She observed as, from the base of the tower, green seemed to sweep across the city like a single wave. Her purple businesses stood no chance as they disappeared one after another in the sea of green.
"Wha... but how...?" she softly muttered in shock.
"I just told you how, didn’t I? You never listen, Rarity. It’s happening because I think it should."
Rarity turned to face Hymnphonic, the rebuttal on her tongue dying before it could escape her lips. Their eyes locked—Rarity’s wide blue eyes met Hymnphonic’s solid green ones, aglow with power and radiating strength. At that moment, Hymnphonic seemed bigger, more intimidating. Rarity felt herself slowly sinking to her knees.
"You've always looked down on me, Rarity, always thinking far too little of me. That used to annoy me greatly, more than you will ever know. Now, however, I’ve begun to feel sorry for you. Your personal opinions and biases have given you tunnel vision, making you blind to the bigger picture around you," the emerald shadow mare said. Her voice was calculated and calm, but it bubbled with old anger.
"A blind mare chasing dreams she doesn’t understand, trying to imitate and assimilate into a world beyond herself." Hymnphonic loomed over Rarity, tilting her chin up with her thumb and holding her gaze. Rarity couldn’t look away; she could only listen.
"Queen of Fashion? I determine what is fashionable. What is deemed correct is so solely because I perceive it that way. I AM society. It shifts and changes based on my whims and my design. I originally intended to put you in your place, but you’ve already done that for me. You are exactly where you belong, and you will remain there indefinitely. However, there’s one last matter I need to address with you. The delusions you hold about yourself are between you and your mirror; whatever helps you sleep at night. But the delusions you seem to nurture about taking from me? Oh, those I will not tolerate. Whatever or whomever I desire is mine."
Rarity managed to frown slightly. Whoever could she be talking about?... oh. Oh, no. "Spike isn't yours," Rarity said firmly. "He'll never be yours! We will undo what you... what you harlots did to him, and Spike will return to the sweet friend he once was!"
Hymnphonic fell silent for a moment before using her telekinesis to lift Rarity and turn her to face the city. Rarity watched as the green haze overtook the skyline. She witnessed all she had spent the past eight years building crumble before her eyes—eight years filled with her blood, sweat, and tears. She had done everything she could to chase her dreams, sacrificing her values at times for the sake of her vision. It was her little kingdom, and now it was all washed away like a castle of sand being erased by an ocean wave. Soon, the entire city was engulfed in green, except for one solitary building—a single dot of purple, glowing defiantly in a sea of green.
“You had your chance…” Hymnphonic declared, her voice firm. “You had eight years of chances. This is your only warning. He. Is. MINE!” she snapped. Her voice resonated as if it were coming from everywhere and nowhere at once. “You treated him like a servant. I will love him like a god .”
The two mares stared at each other in silence—one with a look of absolute finality, the other with a crumbling resolve.
“Your Excellency, your next appointment has arrived,” Diamond Tiara announced, breaking the silence. Hymn smiled and nodded in acknowledgment.
“Right on time, of course. Please let her in.”
Diamond bowed, her expression remaining neutral as she signaled to the attendants at the door. Hymn glanced down at Rarity, whose face was etched with shock and disbelief. With a smirk, the green-eyed mare turned her attention to the opening door.
“Ex… excuse me… I was told to come here to finalize the—Miss Rarity?!”
“Coco?!” Rarity exclaimed, whipping her head around to face the mare who was now rushing toward her, tears streaming down her face.
“I don’t know what happened!” Coco sobbed. “Everything has gone so wrong! I got to the office and the secretaries were talking about people quitting, factories shutting down, and some kind of union strike. Then the banks called…” She hiccupped, wiping her tears on the sleeve of her blouse before continuing. “When I finally got inside, Bean Counter said she figured out the materials problem. The farms have been bought out and are sending materials to other textile mills. It seems some new ones have appeared out of nowhere! I received a letter about new brand licensing or something, and another from our dye manufacturers. After that…”
“Darling! Darling! Breathe! I need the shortened version…” Rarity interrupted, using a handkerchief to wipe her assistant's face.
After taking a moment to calm down, Coco responded softly, her voice tinged with defeat, “...it's all gone. Everything. It felt like civilization itself was working against us all at once… I’m only here because… because…”
“She’s here to finalize the paperwork and sign away your original and now last building,” Hymn said coolly. The anger from before had vanished, and she stood there, regal and beautiful, her calm smile suggesting that what was happening was inevitable. “It's the only way to cancel out all your debts. You were quite the busy bee this past decade, weren’t you? Growing so big, so fast, that you racked up a lot of debt. You took out a large amount of loans. You would have paid them all back in about six months, which is quite impressive—let me give credit where it’s due. It's a shame you came here, though. I promised myself that I wouldn’t intervene until you approached me; I was just going to let you have your fun. Oh well. Tell me, was it fun?”
Rarity could only stare at Hymnphonic, seeing this shadow mare in a new light. She appeared even larger, more powerful, and intimidating—yet simultaneously more radiant, otherworldly, and beautiful. It reminded her of being in Celestria’s presence, which scared her a little. No, if she were being honest, it scared her a lot.
“I lied, by the way. Coco? I didn’t need you to be here; the paperwork had already been finalized. Neither of you needs to sign anything. I just thought Rarity could use some emotional support,” cooed Hymn as she moved back to her throne and sat down, smiling warmly at the mare who diligently sat at her hooves.
Diamond Tiara sat on the cushion at her lady’s feet with silent obedience. This had been her life for nearly a decade—extreme luxury and service to a deity. That’s what Hymnphonic was: a deity. This being may have had Sweetie Belle’s memories, but she was not the filly Diamond had gone to school with. She saw that now. Eight years of bliss in her lady’s service had granted her a luxury beyond her wildest dreams, and every day she thanked Hymnphonic for her mercy. Her lady had known their plans all along and had allowed them to stew in their perceived superiority. Now Diamond understood; they had been foolish. What had they intended to do? Tell on the Masters of Mayhem? Try to get Sweetie Belle in trouble? There was no Sweetie Belle—only Hymnphonic. Only her lady.
Now, she watched as her lady worked. Diamond knew what the outcome would be, but a tiny part of her was curious if this Element of Harmony—her lady’s own older sister—would fare better than the countless others who had graced these halls. As she observed the white mare break down into despair, her assistant weeping beside her, Diamond Tiara knew the answer was a definite no. She silently prayed to her lady, thanking her again for her mercy and expressing gratitude that fate had stopped Diamond and Silver Spoon from doing something extremely foolish, like trying to stand in her lady’s way.
"I am very proud of my throne room," Hymn said. "The tippy top of the tallest tower. After all, what can be higher than me? Maybe a queen?" She glanced down at Rarity, who sat on the floor with tears streaming down her face. Eight years of hard work had been undone, and she struggled to comprehend how it had all happened. It had to be a horrible dream—a nightmare from which she would awaken at any moment.
"Well, Queen of Fashion, as you wallow at the base of my throne, how is the view, Your Majesty? Was it worth it?"
Hymn rose from her throne and gracefully walked past the two weeping mares on the floor, heading toward a doorway of light that had appeared in the center of the room.
"With my victory, the game is over. We can go home, and you and your friends can 'save the world.' You remember your friends, right? After nearly a decade of living out your wildest dreams, you must be so excited to see them again. This was fun! I believe that in the future, you will refrain from underestimating me again. After all, you may have crowned yourself a queen..." Hymn said as she stepped through the doorway, "...but I am a goddess."
So many battles. So many lives lost. War. War never changes. At this point, Fluttershy was starting to feel quite numb to it all. She had lost so many, but she was learning. After all, you can learn a lot more from failure. It’s a harsh teacher who never shies away from making you aware of what you don’t know that you don’t know.
For example, Fluttershy knew basic first aid. That was the extent of her knowledge. She wasn’t a doctor, a combat medic, or even a licensed veterinarian. This truth became increasingly clear as she lost more of her soldiers. She could have probably saved quite a few and treated many more if only she had known how.
Another area where she became uncomfortable and aware of her limitations was strategy. She had always left the planning and heavy thinking to others, simply following along and doing what she was told. This habit had come back to haunt her since she was now the one responsible for planning and strategy. But she was learning. Oh yes, she was learning.
“My shield can’t hold out much longer!” cried the pony to her left on the bridge.
“You can do it, Lt. Blockade! Just hold on a little longer; we’re almost in range!” Fluttershy responded. “Commanders, tell the gunners to ready the forward burst cannons and fire on my mark.”
Two commanders next to her saluted and hurried to the communications room. Fluttershy then turned her full attention to her lieutenant beside her. The stallion was gripping his fists so tightly that his knuckles were white. His eyes were shut tight in concentration, sweat dripped from his brow, and a trickle of blood flowed from his nose. His body shook from exhaustion as he spoke, his voice ragged, “I…I can’t keep up the shield, Admiral! Their firepower is too gre—AUGHH!!”
There was a mighty crack and the sound of tons of glass shattering as the shield around the ship broke apart. Lieutenant Blockade's body crumpled to the floor, the exhausted stallion wheezing.
"I can't... that was all I had..." he coughed out as Fluttershy knelt beside him, helping to support his weight as cannon fire rocked the ship.
"Shhh, hush now, you did great. It was my plan that failed... I'm sorry..." the yellow pegasus whispered.
"W-we were close, though, right?" Blockade asked.
"So close," Fluttershy confirmed with a sad smile. Then, a loud explosion shook the ship, and it lurched downward.
"You’ll get her next time, Admiral. I won’t be there to see it, but I know it’ll be hardcore..."
Fluttershy simply smiled and closed her eyes, accepting the end. Suddenly, the ship stopped abruptly, flinging her forward. There was an explosion, a surge of pressure, a wave of heat, and then pain. And then, nothing.
Author's Note
Hey, its me again. Just wanted to say that I might be going back to clean up previous chapters. So don't be surprised if you re-read the story and it's not exactly like you remembered.
Thanks for reading!
Chapter 1 - The day after the Dawn
Birds chirped outside as the smell of pancakes and fresh coffee awoke Twilight. The purple alicorn groaned as she stretched and rubbed her head. Her neck was sore and she had a few knots in her back, on top of the bruises she has sustained the previous night. She shrugged and chalked it up to an old pillow and sleeping in a bad position. Today was a new day and after what could be said to be the worst night of her life she was going to tackle it full of optimism. Yes, that’s exactly what she’ll do, she’ll be optimistic. Of course she’ll have to send a letter to Celestia about the prank Discord pulled. What he did to her and her friends was simply unacceptable. She’ll also have to write to Luna about a terrible nightmare she had.
Twilight stepped into her bathroom, hoping a hot shower would help relieve her aching body. All in all it did help a little, though her breasts were feeling rather tender. Getting dressed took more effort than she expected. It was official, she WAS getting bigger. Not only did her bras and panties barely fit but she suspected she was taller now too; if how high up her skirt was riding was any indication. Groaning in frustration, she put on a pair of sweatpants and a loose fitting t shirt and went down to the kitchen.
“Good morning Spike” she said with a tired yawn as she walked through the doorway. She went straight for the hot pot of coffee on the stove, her back to her little brother and the kitchen table. “Last night was just terribly, I don’t know what Discord was thinking. I mean sure, who ever knows what Discord is thinking, but still! Anyways, I must have been really out of it when I came home because I had the weirdest nightmare. I dreamed that Discord hadn’t done any of that, that he had actually retired, and this new creature had taken over as god of chaos. Can you imagine, haha?! To make things weirder that creature, whose name I can’t remember right now, said that THEY didn’t do it, but YOU did. Yea, crazy right? You gave yourself a new name too, Dis-something”
“Disarray. My name is Disarray now Twi, not Spike” said the black scaled drake, calmly sitting and eating his breakfast.
Twilight froze and slowly turned around, seeing the dragon sitting there, a massive tower of pancakes on the table. She just stared. Slowly she moved over to a nearby wall and started banging her head against it.
From around the other side of the table, hidden behind the massive stack of pancakes, a tall white finger stood up and moved to the purple princess’ side.
“Are you alright dear Twilight?” Celestia asked soothingly, patting the younger alicorn.
Twilight didn’t even notice who was talking to her, continuing to bang her head against the wall harder and harder.
“Am I alright? I don’t know. I don’t know if I’m alright. Last night was the worst night I’ve ever had. Even with the power of Harmony we weren’t able to stop a stupid joke and ended up utterly humiliated! Can you imagine that? The power of Harmony didn’t work! I’m not sure if anything is ok right now! I get home, ready to freeze Discord in stone again and surprise surprise, Discord is retired and named some weird creature the new god of chaos! And then. AND THEN! To top everything off, it wasn’t even this new creatures fault, it was Spike! Spike, my number one assistant and baby brother, betrayed us and orchestrated the worst night I’ve ever experienced!”
“Disarray” corrected Disarray.
Celestia shot the drake a quick look and turned back to her ex student, placing a hand on her shoulder “It’s ok Twilight, you just had a really bad night is all.”
Twilight, her brain finally recognizing the voice speaking to her, turned around blinking in surprise “Princess Celestia? Oh my gosh I’m so sorry, I just realized it was you! What are you doing here?”
The white alicorn shrugged happily “I just came to see if what Luna told me was true. Spike joining Chaos? If I don't see it, I don't believe it. As for this horrible night and new god of chaos, I know you and your friends can overcome anything this new god can throw at you. You are heroes of Equestria after all.”
Twilight sighed “But last night was just so...horrible. Discord was never this hard to beat…”
“You didn’t have to fight him a couple thousand years ago. Luna and I had to deal with him, and you’ll have to deal with this new god of chaos, and of course their associates. Speaking of whom, Spike…”
“Disarray” the dragon responded.
Celestia smirked and gave a nod “Disarray, just remember; even if you work for chaos, even as you bring disorder to the world, don’t ever forget about true friendship okay? Unlimited power is no substitute for good friends.”
Disarray gave a nod and smiled “Not a problem Princess. Only fun and games, silly pranks, and just the right amount of chaos to spice things up. I’m not Discord, I do things my own way.”
The princess of the sun smiled and nodded her head, satisfied that her ex-student’s assistant hadn’t gone completely evil. “I’m glad to hear it. I’ll take my leave of you two now. Thank you for the most amazing breakfast Spi-I mean Disarray” she said before teleporting back to Canterlot.
Twilight just sighed and sat at the table, all this stress and mild panic was giving her quite the appetite.
“Celestria’s right; I shouldn’t overreact to this. I shouldn’t be too upset about last night either. Spike, er, I mean Disarray, last night as an excellent prank” she said flatly, more to be kind than out of any sincerity. Her baby brother had changed and she needed to accept that and move forward.
She reached out and took some of the pancakes and placed them on a plate. Picking a knife and fork she used her magic to pour some syrup over them. Pancakes and a fresh cup of coffee, not a bad way to start the day. She was about to take a bite when a voice stopped her.
“I wouldn’t eat those if I were you” Disarray warned, continuing to munch on his bowl of gems.
Dismissing him, Twilight huffed “If they’re good enough for the princess they’re good enough for me. Please, I just want a nice breakfast”
Taking a bite, her eyes widened. These there the best pancakes she’d ever eaten. They were perfect! She took another bite, and then another. Soon, her plate was clean and she quickly piled on more pancakes and continued eating. Disarray just shrugged
“Don’t say I didn’t warn you” he said.
“I don’t see what you’re going on about! These are amazing!” Twilight said, shoving another forkful in her mouth
“Sure” Disarray responded “unnaturally amazing even?”
Twilight immediately stopped eating, a feeling of dread washing over her. “Disarray...what did you do?”
“Take a closer look”
The purple princess looked at her food. She couldn’t see anything off. They were just normal chocolate chip pancakes. Well, the chocolate chips were a bit harder than normal...wait...
“No. You didn’t!” she cried
“Didn’t what? Make pancakes using tiny versions of the Candy of all Candies? Because I totally did” the dragon said with a grin, finishing up his breakfast.
“But Princess Celestia ate these! Do you know what that means?!” cried Twilight.
“Of course, it means she’ll no longer be able to eat sweets. Come on Twi, you know how she is. Always complaining about her figure, and then not two hours later going on a candy binge. It’s an endless destructive cycle and I’m helping her break it. If anything I’m doing her a huge favor, I should get a medal haha” Disarray said with a chuckle.
Twilight opened her mouth to respond but Disarray cut her off “As much as I’d looooove to hear a lecture from you Twi” he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm “I have a meeting to get to, so tootles”
With that, Disarray teleported away in a puff of purple flame. Twilight just sat there dumbfounded, staring at the spot Disarray had been, and down to her half eaten plate of pancakes. It was too early for this.
The black scaled dragon arrived just outside the old CMC clubhouse. He could hear the girls talking amongst themselves as he walked up to the door and knocked. The voices quieted down and he heard his boss call out “It’s open Disarray, come on in"
Opening the door and stepping inside, a task that required him ducking his head, Disarray was surprised at what greeted him. The outside of the clubhouse looked exactly the same as aways, an old rundown brightly painted shack built for foals. However, the whole interior had been impossibly expanded and redecorated. Sure it still looked like a wooden room, but the wood was stained and polished, there was a nice carpet on the floor, and in the center of the room was a large conference table.
The girls were already sitting at the table, folders and notebooks laid open in front of them. All three of them had overly giggy expression on their faces “Glad ya could join us Disarray” Bad Seed said with a smirk
The black dragon smiled and took a seat at the table as Hymn spoke up “Mael told us you revealed yourself. Twilight didn’t give you a hard time did she?”
“No” Disarray answered “though I think she’s still coming to terms with it. Anywho, I’m glad to see you three are still here. That means you’ve accepted the position, yes?”
Shadow Blitz nodded and pumped her fist into the air. “You’re looking at the newest Masters of Mayhem!” she said, standing up and pulling her pants down “And look! We finally got our cutiemarks!”
Disarray blushed and looked away “Cool, but you could have just showed me on your shoulder…”
“Ah said the same thing!” agreed Seed
“But you wouldn’t be able to see all the details!” protested Shadow
“ANYWAY! You all didn’t get in trouble with your sister’s did you?” Disarray asked.
Hymn shook her head “Rarity took a long shower and went straight to bed. Wouldn’t even acknowledge I was there, just mumbling about making someone pay and about her hair”
“I stayed over Rainbow’s last night. She was really pissed but she just flew a few laps around ponyville and collapsed on her couch” replied Shadow
“Well, ah didn’t have any problems per say…” began Seed, suddenly finding herself the center of attention in the room “It’s nothin really! Applejack just asked me if I were a part of that mob that got em last night…”
Maelstrom, who up to this point had just been contently listening to the four talk sat up “And what did you tell her?” they asked.
“Ah told her the truth” replied Seed, grinning “She asked if ah was part of the mob, ah told her ah wasn’t”
Disarray had an amused look on his face. Even Maelstrom seemed impressed that Bad Seed was able to pull one over her sister; the element of Honesty. Being able to stretch or twist the truth, to lie without lying, is good skill to have. However the pleasanties were over and now it was time for business.
“I personally want to extend a company thank you to you three for signing on. I’ve made your powers permanent and, just as we talked about the previous night, you are now lesser gods. This comes with all the previous mentioned perks along with immortality. Speaking of immortality, you’ll be able to make yourself look as old or as young as you wish or need to be” explained Mael. The girls look at their new boss excitedly. Hymnphonic slowly raised her hand “Yes Hymn, I gave you three the ability to hide your cutiemarks. I understand why you don’t wish for your siblings and family to know yet.” Hymn lowered her hand. “Good, now, before we begin this meeting in full, does anyone have any new prank ideas they’d like to suggest?”
The room was silent, as the Master’s of Mayhem thought over everything they could do. Eventually Disarray spoke up “I have a few ideas that I think will end up hilarious. They’re all either half baked or too complicated to pull off, so I’ll present them when I hammer out the details”
Mael nodded “Alrighty, keep working on them Disarray. You did an absolutely amazing job planning that prank you all pulled last night, I expect great things from you”
Disarray beamed with pride “I won’t let you down boss!”
“I know you won’t” Mael responded with a soft smile. Addressing everyone, they continued “Before I begin, I would like to let you all know that I am working on making the team an actual office offworld, back at company HQ.” There were murmurs about the prospect of traveling to a different dimension. “It’ll take me a bit, Discord left things a mess, so I have to go through a lot of paperwork, and then actually construct the room. It’s going to take at least a week, so be patient with me.” they concluded, the Masters of Mayhem nodding to the God of Chaos, eyes twinkling with excitement.
Happy to see their team excited about seeing and learning new things Mael continued “now, I haven’t spent a lot of time on this world, so I don’t know exactly how things work around here. So, the first order of business is the general debriefing. I’ll tell you everything Discord told me. We’ll go through all of his files I already have somewhat organized and you’ll help fill in the blanks with current events and cultural norms. Knowing everything you can will make you all better at your jobs in the long run. Afterwards I’ll help all of you train with your powers. Are we all in agreement?”
There were nods around the table and they began in earnest.
Disarray teleported back to the castle, startling Twilight who wasn’t yet used to her baby brother using magic. Ignoring her shocked expression, he gave her one of complete seriousness.
“I was thinking Twi, we need to invite the girls over so I can better explain things to them” he said.
Twilight nodded “That is an excellent idea! You can also take the opportunity to apologize for last night’s prank.”
“Um, no. I’m not apologizing for doing my job” was all Disarray said as he wrote the letter and sent it along with his green messenger breath.
After about fifteen minutes, the rest of the elements arrived. After having calmed down from the previous night, they all willingly and patiently let Disarray explain the new situation to them. In the end they were all nodding in understandment.
“Look, I’ll admit it was a good prank” said Rainbow Dash “but if this is a job for you, you’re gonna have to do much better. I expect the best!”
Disarray grinning “Last night was just a preliminary skirmish. We have some really good stuff in the works”
“Please don’t encourage him Rainbow” Twilight said with an exasperated sigh “So, this Maelstrom character isn’t threatening you or anything?”
“No, I joined her...him...them, on my own. They’ve been nothing but kind and supportive.” the drake answered.
Twilight seemed satisfied with the answer but was still confused as to WHY he decided to join willingly. At least he wasn’t being threatened or hurt.
Applejack then spoke up, adding with a smile “I think we all forgive ya Spi-er, Disarray. Ah’m just glad you didn’t go full evil. Last night was real embarrassing, but even ah have to admit that was a mighty clever prank ya pulled. Also, thank ya for keeping Applebloom out of it. I had asked her last night if she were part of that mob. She said she didn’t even try that candy of yers”
Pinkie moved up close to the dragon and asked “Speaking of...so Disarray, do you think you can hook a mare up with some of that delicious and famous candy of yours? You know, that ‘best candy ever’ Candy of all Candies? I’m DYING to know what it tastes like! I NEEEEEEED to know!”
Rarity grabbed her arm and gently pulled the pink pony back “Darling, a chef depends on their taste and pallet to hone their craft. As a pastry chef I’d highly recommend you not ruin your taste for sweets. However, back to the more important matter at hand; yes I forgive you Spikey-Wikey, but do you have ANY idea how late I had to stay up fixing my hair and tail after that disaster?! Do try to be more careful next time please!”
Disarray only chuckled, thinking to himself I make no promises
“I think it’s alright...I mean as long as you don’t do anything really evil” added Fluttershy softly.
With everything explained and forgiven, there was only one thing left to do.
“You know what this calls for right?” asked Pinkie Pie
“A party?” responded everyone else in unison
“But not just any party! A ‘congrats-on-becoming-our-new-evil-enemy-that-isn’t-really-evil’ party!” the pink earth pony cried out.
Before anyone could object, the pink mare had decorated the room, placed out a table full of snacks and drinks, had music playing, and had even somehow got a cake that read ‘Congrats Disarray’ in frosting. Without any complaints the party began.
Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon sat in Sugarcube Corner keeping a watchful eye on their sworn enemies; the Cutiemark Crusaders. The two young mares were convinced that the trio were up to something. After that cured Nightmare Night a little over a week ago they wouldn’t stop talking and whispering amongst themselves. Normally this wouldn’t be anything out of the ordinary if the general air about them hadn’t shifted so drastically. They appeared calmer, more relaxed and in control. They were still full of energy, but it no longer came off as hyperactive to the ponies around them. It was weird, even for weirdos like them. Silver had even overheard Snips ask Scootaloo what their next stupid hairbrained scheme would be, in an attempt to get her hands on some juicy gossip. Instead of yelling at him for making fun of her or go on about some plan that would never work, Scootaloo just shrugged, said ‘nothing’, and walked away.
“They’re definitely up to something” said Diamond, taking a bite of her cheese croissant, she couldn’t eat sweets anymore due to that Candy of all Candies.
Looking over at the trio eat their large cupcakes, Silver scoffed “they didn’t even eat that evil treat!”
In truth, there was a nice sized handful of kids who weren’t affected by the Nightmare Night prank. Mainly, it was kids who either had decided to not go outside, or were out of town at the time. Across the small bakery, Button Mash could be seen munching on a cookie.
Diamond and Silver continue watching them as stealthily as they could until they say a scroll appear in a small burst of flame and fall in front of Applebloom. The farm mare opened and read it to the other two, with a group giggle all three got up and left after throwing the note in the trash.
“I’ll wait outside and make sure they’re gone, you get the note” said Diamond, Silver simply nodding and moving over to the trash can with a couple napkins in hand. It was a simple task of dropping the napkins in the can and quickly picking up the note before heading out the door.
“Do you have it?” asked Diamond as Silver walked out the pastry show. The grey mare just smiled and raised a hand holding the crumpled piece of paper. “What does it say?”
Opening it up Silver gave a confused expression. “...I don’t get it…”
“Here, let me see” said Diamond, taking the piece of paper and looking it over, her own expression morphing into that of confusion as well.
On the paper was a drawing of a boxing glove with the words “Look closer ” written on it.
Diamond continued staring at the paper until she noticed some tiny print written right on the middle of the drawing. She leaned in, but couldn’t quite make it out. “Can you read what this says Silver?” she asked, pointing to the tiny print.
Silver Spoon leaned in as well to try and make out the print. Diamond Tiara leaned in a bit more. Silver followed along with. Soon they were both cheek to cheek with the paper almost pressed to their faces.
“Wait, I think I got it, it says: Kapow!” said Silver suddenly
“Kapow? What does that mea-” Diamond began but never finished.
Before the two could react a spring loaded boxing glove exploded out the paper, socking them both in the face and knocking them on their asses.
Silver Spoon just laid on her back, looking up at the clouds. She’d never noticed how pretty they were before. Diamond managed to sit up in time to see the piece of paper burn away with purple flames. Only one question came out of her mouth.
“Wha...”
Author's Note
Cutiemark Crusaders no more, they have assended to heights beyond their wildest imagination!
Drawn by MPL
Chapter 14 - Everything is Awesome
There was a bright flash.
Then nothing.
Then...
An alarm pierced the silence and Twilight opened her eyes with a yawn. A small smile gracing her face as she gave a satisfying stretch.
“Another wonderful, amazing, awesome morning” she said to herself as she stared out the window, looking at the perfect sunrise. “Good morning sun! Good morning sky!”
She climbed out of bed with a spring in her step and made her way to the kitchen, passing by a couple spare bedrooms, some closets, and the upper entrance to her library. “Good morning castle, good morning library, and hello good looking books!”
Unable to help herself she browsed some nearby shelves for some awesome breakfast reading. Twilight found herself unable to decide between ‘Trapezoids and You ’ and ‘Magnets: How do they even? ’, ultimately she picked ‘The In-depth Catalog of Catalogs vol 14 ’ and continued on her journey to her kitchen.
Passing by an open window she found herself unable to contain the contentment in her heart any longer. She stuck her head out and joyfully shouted “Good morning Ponyville!” Happy to hear many cheerful greetings from the many denizens of her town already up and active.
Satisfied she once again made her way to her kitchen and had a quick breakfast of cinnamon apple oatmeal and buttered toast. She did some simple and easy exercises, took a nice hot shower, and decided to turn on her radio as she got dressed in her typical shirt and blouse.
A huge grin spread across her face as she recognized the opening notes of a song.
“Oh, I love this one!” she practically squealed as she finished getting dressed and pranced out her door.
“Everything is awesome!” everypony outside sang in unison. “Everything is cool when you’re part of a team! Everything is awesome! When you’re living our dream”
Outside was perfect. Everypony was in harmony. Through the sky the weather team worked, led by Rainbow Dash. Her monochromatic trail zipping and swirling around as the team of pegasus continued to buck clouds in sync, singing along with everypony else. “Everything's better when we stick together! Side by side, you and I gonna win forever! Let’s party forever!”
What could be better than this? Even the birds sang in perfect harmony, testament to Fluttershy’s hard work. Twilight smiled and strolled over to Carousel Boutique to meet with Rarity; the fashionista had said she had something to show her.
Outside the boutique, Rarity was waiting for her. “Right on time Twilight, as always.”
The purple princess smiled at her friend “Punctuality is second only to harmony. So what did you want to show me?”
“Oh! Come in and see my latest and greatest creation!” Rarity proudly proclaimed, all but shoving her friend through the door and into the shop.
The inside looked about the same as always, save for the lack of the usual multitudes of fabric. Rarity swirled in place, gesturing around excitedly. Looking at where Rarity was pointing, Twilight noticed that every ponnequin was wearing the same outfit; a light grey form-fitting jumpsuit.
“These have just been flying off the shelves, I can hardly keep up with demand!” the fashionista giddily explained. “It’s perfect! It’ll keep you cool in the summer, warm in the winter, yet still breaths like the finest silk. It’s form fitting design will hug your curves in all the right ways, showing off a perfect figure every time! It’s the pinnacle of the harmony between form and fashion!”
“That’s amazing Rarity!” Twilight said, sharing her friend’s excitement. “I’d like to place an order for some immediately!”
“Oh pish posh darling” Rarity replied. “I’ve already finished a full set for you and each of our other three friends. Here, you can get changed in the dressing room” she said, handing twilight a brown paper shopping bag.
Twilight quickly changed into the very comfortable and form-flattering jumpsuit, thanked Rarity, and proceeded on her way.
Next stop, Sugarcube Corner.
Making her way through town, Twilight couldn’t help but notice that everypony was wearing the same jumpsuit. Rarity wasn’t kidding about these things selling. Around her the music of harmony continued to swell and play, and she couldn’t help singing with fellow ponies.
“We’re the same, I’m like you, you’re like me. We’re all working in harmony. Everything is awesome! Everything is cool when you’re part of a team. Everything is awesome, when we’re living our dream”
Reaching Sugarcube Corner, Twilight was momentarily perplexed about the lack of the usual line out the door. Ponies were steadily going in and coming out, but only a couple days ago there seemed to be a line almost around the block. Curious, Twilight entered the bakery and walked right up to the counter.
“Heya Twilight!” greeted Pinkie Pie, a huge smile on her face. “Here for your cupcake?”
“What’s the snack of the day?” questioned Twilight. Had she missed some sort of special going on?
“We call it the ‘Chocobomb’ the greatest cupcake EVER!” Pinkie Pie proudly proclaimed. “It's a chocolate cupcake with chocolate fudge filling, chocolate icing, and chocolate sprinkles!” Pinkie said, gesturing to the display case. Every food item in it was a Chocobomb Cupcake.
“What else do you have Pinkie?” asked Twilight.
“Well, ummm….” Pinkie pondered, looking around for a second before reaching under the counter and holding an object out to Twilight. “Apple?”
“I’ll take the cupcake Pinkie” Twilight responded with a laugh and a shake of her head. So that’s why there was no line; with no other options there’s no need to stand around waiting for somepony to finish their orders. Efficient.
Without waiting another moment, Twilight took a bite. It was the single greatest cupcake she had ever eaten. It felt as if the chocolate goodness was lifting her right off the ground.
Wait, she actually WAS off the ground!
Twilight looked over at Pinkie who was floating next to her, the pink mare’s eyes and mouth open unnaturally wide and glowing with a familiar light; she looked almost in pain. Twilight felt the familiar power swell inside her, bursting to explode.
There was a bright flash.
Then nothing.
Then...
An alarm pierced the silence and Twilight opened her eyes with a yawn. A small smile graced her face as she gave a satisfying stretch.
“Another wonderful, amazing, awesome morning” she said to herself as she stared out the window, looking at the perfect sunrise. “Good morning sun! Good morning sky!”
She climbed out of bed with a spring in her step and made her way to the kitchen, passing by a couple spare bedrooms, some closets, and the upper entrance to her library. “Good morning castle, good morning library, and hello good looking books!”
Unable to help herself she browsed some nearby shelves for some awesome breakfast reading. Twilight found herself unable to decide between ‘The Art of Watching Paint Dry vol 2: The Second Coat ’ and ‘Listening to your Lawn: A Grower’s Guide to Advanced Lawnkeeping ’, ultimately she picked ‘The In-depth Catalog of Catalogs vol 14 ’ and continued on her journey to her kitchen.
Passing by an open window she found herself unable to contain the contentment in her heart any longer. She stuck her head out and shouted “Good morning Ponyville!” Happy to hear many cheerful greetings from the many denizens of her town already up and active.
Satisfied she once again made her way to her kitchen and had a quick breakfast of cinnamon oatmeal and buttered toast. She did some simple and easy exercises, took a nice hot shower, and decided to turn on her radio as she got dressed in her typical grey jumpsuit.
A huge grin spread across her face as she recognized the opening notes of a song.
“Oh, I love this one!” she practically squealed as she finished getting dressed and walked out her door.
“Everything is awesome!” everypony outside sang in unison. “Everything is cool when you’re part of a team! Everything is awesome! When you’re living a dream”
Outside was perfect. Everypony was in harmony. Through the sky, the weather team worked, led by Rainbow Dash in her grey jumpsuit. Her monochromatic trail zipping and swirling around as the team of pegasus continued to buck clouds in sync, singing along with everypony else. “Everything's better when we stick together! Side by side, you and I gonna win forever! Let’s party forever!”
What could be better than this? Even the birds sang in perfect harmony. Twilight smiled and strolled over to Carousel Boutique to meet with Rarity.
Outside the boutique, Rarity was waiting for her. “Right on time Twilight, as always.”
The purple princess smiled at her friend “Punctuality is second only to harmony. Congratulations by the way. Everypony seems to love your jumpsuit”
“I know darling! Everypony from here to Manehatten is wearing it” Rarity proudly proclaimed.
“Orders must be backed up then, with all the demand,” said Twilight.
“Oh nothing of the sort darling” Rarity replied. “I haven’t gotten a single order for them. It seems that every other fashion designer in equestria has loved my design so much they’ve adopted it themselves. That means they can fill local orders, and I don’t have to work nearly as hard” the white mare said with a wistful sigh “Well, work at all. Since everypony in Ponyville already has their clothes, I don’t see any orders coming at all in the foreseeable future”
“Rarity, that's amazing! You’ve become the most successful fashion designer in Equestrian history! It’s just what you’ve always wanted!” Twilight said, hugging her friend.
Rarity just smiled and thanked her. Twilight didn’t notice, but it seemed a spark had gone out in the fashionista’s eyes. They looked empty, vacant. “Well, I’m going to go take a nap, I'm feeling a bit tired”
Twilight gave her friend one last hug, wished her the best, and proceeded on her way. Next stop, Sugarcube Corner.
Making her way through town, Twilight couldn’t help but smile. Around her the music of harmony continued to swell and play, and she couldn’t help singing with fellow ponies.
“We’re the same, I’m like you, you’re like me. We’re all working in harmony. Everything is awesome! Everything is cool when you’re part of a team. Everything is awesome, when we’re living our dream”
Reaching Sugarcube Corner, Twilight entered the bakery and walked right up to the counter.
“Heya Twilight!” greeted Pinkie Pie, a huge smile on her face. “Here for your cupcake?”
“What’s the snack of the day?” questioned Twilight. Had she missed some kind of special going on?
“We call it the ‘Chocobomb’ the greatest cupcake EVER!” Pinkie Pie proudly proclaimed. “It's a chocolate cupcake with chocolate fudge filling!” Pinkie said, gesturing to the display case. Every food item in it was a Chocobomb Cupcake.
“I’ll take the one Pinkie” Twilight responded with a laugh and a shake of her head.
Pinkie handed her one and without waiting another moment, Twilight took a bite. It was the single greatest cupcake she had ever eaten. It felt as if the chocolate goodness was lifting her right off the ground.
Wait, she actually WAS off the ground!
Twilight looked over at Pinkie who was floating next to her, the pink mare’s eyes and mouth open unnaturally wide and glowing with a familiar light; she looked almost in pain. She felt the familiar power swell inside her, bursting to explode.
There was a bright flash.
Then nothing.
Then...
An alarm pierced the silence and Twilight opened her eyes with a yawn. A small smile graced her face as she gave a satisfying stretch.
“Another wonderful, amazing, awesome morning” she said to herself as she stared out the window, looking at the perfect sunrise. “Good morning sun. Good morning sky”
She climbed out of bed with a slight spring in her step and made her way to the kitchen, passing by a couple spare bedrooms, some closets, and the upper entrance to her library. “Good morning castle, good morning library, and hello good looking books!”
Unable to help herself she browsed some nearby shelves for some awesome breakfast reading. Twilight found herself unable to decide between ‘The In-depth Catalog of Catalogs vol 12 ’ and ‘The Indepth Catalog of Catalogs vol 13 ’, ultimately she decided to live a little dangerously and picked ‘The In-depth Catalog of Catalogs vol 14 ’ and continued on her journey to her kitchen.
Passing by an open window she found herself unable to contain the contentment in her heart any longer. She poked her head out and shouted “Good morning Ponyville!” Happy to hear many cheerful greetings from the many denizens of her town already up and active.
Satisfied she once again made her way to her kitchen and had a quick breakfast of oatmeal and buttered toast. She did some simple and easy exercises, took a shower, and decided to turn on her radio as she got dressed in her typical grey jumpsuit.
A huge grin spread across her face as she recognized the opening notes of a song.
“Oh, I love this one!” she practically squealed as she finished getting dressed and walked out her door.
“Everything is awesome!” everypony outside sang in unison. “Everything is cool when you’re part of a team! Everything is awesome! When you’re living a dream”
Outside was perfect. Everypony was in harmony. Through the sky the weather team worked; the team of pegasus bucked clouds in sync, singing along with everypony else. “Everything's better when we stick together! Side by side, you and I gonna win forever! Let’s party forever!”
What could be better than this? Twilight smiled and strolled past a closed Carousel Boutique. It made sense that it was closed. Everyone had their jumpsuits, and Rarity deserved some rest. Best not to disturb her friend. On to her next stop; Sugarcube Corner.
Making her way through town, Twilight couldn’t help but smile. Around her the music of harmony continued to swell and play, and she couldn’t help singing with fellow ponies.
“We’re the same, I’m like you, you’re like me. We’re all working in harmony. Everything is awesome! Everything is cool when you’re part of a team. Everything is awesome, when we’re living our dream”
Reaching Sugarcube Corner, Twilight entered the bakery and walked right up to the counter.
“Heya Twilight!” greeted Pinkie Pie, a huge smile on her face. “Here for your muffin?”
“What’s the snack of the day?” questioned Twilight.
“We call it the ‘Chocobomb’ the greatest muffin EVER!” Pinkie Pie proudly proclaimed. “It's a plain brand muffin with chocolate fudge filling!'' Pinkie said, gesturing to the display case. Every food item in it was a Chocobomb muffin.
“I’ll take the one Pinkie” Twilight responded with a laugh and a shake of her head.
Pinkie handed her one and without waiting another moment, Twilight took a bite. It was the single greatest muffin she had ever eaten. It felt as if the chocolate goodness was lifting her right off the ground.
Wait, she actually WAS off the ground!
Twilight looked over at Pinkie who was floating next to her, the pink mare’s eyes and mouth open unnaturally wide and glowing with a familiar light. She felt the familiar power swell inside her, bursting to explode.
There was a bright flash.
Then nothing.
Then...
An alarm pierced the silence and Twilight opened her eyes with a yawn. A small smile graced her face as she gave a satisfying stretch.
“Another wonderful, amazing, awesome morning” she said to herself as she stared out the window, looking at the perfect sunrise. “Good morning sun. Good morning sky”
She climbed out of bed and made her way to the kitchen, passing by a couple spare bedrooms, some closets, and the upper entrance to her library. “Good morning castle, good morning library, and hello good looking books!”
Unable to help herself she browsed some nearby shelves for some awesome breakfast reading. Twilight found herself unable to decide between ‘The In-depth Catalog of Catalogs vol 12 ’ and ‘The In-depth Catalog of Catalogs vol 13 ’, ultimately she picked ‘The Equestrian Dictionary vol 2 ’ and continued on her journey to her kitchen.
Once there she had a quick breakfast of oatmeal and toast. She did some simple and easy exercises, took a nice hot shower, and decided to turn on her radio as she got dressed in her typical grey jumpsuit.
A huge grin spread across her face as she recognized the opening notes of a song.
“Oh, I love this one!” she practically squealed as she finished getting dressed and walked out her door.
“Everything is awesome!” everypony outside sang in unison. “Everything is cool when you’re part of a team! Everything is awesome! When you’re living a dream”
Outside was perfect. Everypony was in harmony. Through the sky the weather team worked; the team of pegasus bucked clouds in sync, singing along with everypony else. “Everything's better when we stick together! Side by side, you and I gonna win forever! Let’s party forever!”
What could be better than this? Twilight smiled and strolled past a closed Carousel Boutique. Her destination; Sugarcube Corner.
Making her way through town, Twilight couldn’t help smile. Around her the music of harmony continued to swell and play, and she couldn’t help singing with fellow ponies.
“We’re the same, I’m like you, you’re like me. We’re all working in harmony. Everything is awesome! Everything is cool when you’re part of a team. Everything is awesome, when we’re living our dream”
Reaching Sugarcube Corner, Twilight entered the bakery and walked right up to the counter.
“Heya Twilight!” greeted Pinkie Pie, a huge smile on her face. “Here for your muffin?”
“What’s the snack of the day?” questioned Twilight.
“We call it the ‘Chocobomb’ the greatest muffin EVER!” Pinkie Pie proudly proclaimed. “It's a plain brand muffin with chocolate chips!” Pinkie said, leaning in close and whispering “You know, to add flavor and excitement” gesturing to the display case. Every food item in it was a Chocobomb muffin.
“I’ll take the one Pinkie” Twilight responded with a laugh and a shake of her head.
Pinkie handed her one and without waiting another moment, Twilight took a bite. It was the single greatest muffin she had ever eaten. It felt as if the chocolate goodness was lifting her right off the ground.
Wait, she actually WAS off the ground!
Twilight looked over at Pinkie who was floating next to her,the pink mare’s eyes and mouth open unnaturally wide and glowing with a familiar light. She felt the familiar power swell inside her, bursting to explode.
There was a bright flash.
Then nothing.
Then...
An alarm pierced the silence and Twilight opened her eyes with a yawn. A small smile graced her face as she gave a satisfying stretch.
“Another wonderful, amazing, awesome morning” she said to herself as she stared out the window, looking at the perfect sunrise. “Good morning sun. Good morning sky”
She climbed out of bed and made her way to the kitchen, passing by a couple spare bedrooms, some closets, and the upper entrance to her library. “Good morning castle, good morning library, and hello good looking books!”
Unable to help herself she browsed some nearby shelves for some awesome breakfast reading. Twilight picked ‘The Equestrian Dictionary vol 2 ’ and continued on her journey to her kitchen.
Once there she had a quick breakfast of plain oatmeal and toast. She did some simple and easy exercises, took a nice hot shower, and decided to turn on her radio as she got dressed in her typical grey jumpsuit.
A small grin graced her face as she recognized the opening notes of a song.
“Oh, I love this one.” she said as she finished getting dressed and walked out her door.
“Everything is awesome!” everypony outside sang in unison. “Everything is cool when you’re part of a team! Everything is awesome! When you’re living a dream”
Outside was perfect. The weather was perfect. Everypony was in harmony. “Everything's better when we stick together! Side by side, you and I gonna win forever! Let’s party forever!”
What could be better than this? Twilight smiled and continued her stroll through Ponyville. Her destination; Sugarcube Corner.
Making her way through town, Twilight couldn’t help but smile. Around her the music of harmony continued to swell and play, and she couldn’t help singing with fellow ponies.
“We’re the same, I’m like you, you’re like me. We’re all working in harmony. Everything is awesome! Everything is cool when you’re part of a team. Everything is awesome, when we’re living our dream”
Reaching Sugarcube Corner, Twilight entered the bakery and walked right up to the counter.
“Heya Twilight!” greeted Pinkie Pie. “Here for your muffin?”
“What’s the snack of the day?” questioned Twilight.
“Oh, just a muffin” Pinkie said, a smile on her face but her eyes vacant and dull. Twilight hadn’t noticed, she was looking at the display case, every food item in it was a muffin.
“I’ll take the one Pinkie” Twilight responded with a laugh and a shake of her head.
Pinkie handed her one and without waiting another moment, Twilight took a bite. It was a tasty muffin.
“Thanks Pinkie” Twilight said, placing a couple bits on the counter and moving towards the door. Pinkie put the coins in the register and yawned, following her friend.
“Oh, anytime Twilight. If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go on break and take a quick nap. All this baking has made me tired” The pink baker said, moving over to the door, locking it from the inside, and switching the ‘Open’ sign to ‘Closed’.
Twilight smiled and finished her muffin as she continued on her way, taking a final glance back at the now closed Sugarcube Corner. Now she needed to visit the mayor about some paperwork. Everything sure was awesome.
Everything was not awesome, though she couldn’t help but sing about it. She wanted to cry, to scream, but all she could do was smile. All she could do was smile. Smile. Smile. Smile. Everything was awesome. Everything was good when you were part of a team. Smile. Smile.
Starlight Glimmer was miserable. Her whole town was; she can see that now. She had taken away their cutiemarks to try and make them all the same. She had forced them to sing and smile. She had thought that it was perfection, perfect equality. Everypony in sync, everypony the same. It was pure torture. Her poor town, ponies she had blindly considered her friends, smiling and singing with absolute glee. She knew better now, she could see it in their eyes. Their empty hollow eyes. She wanted to scream, to cry, but all she could do was smile. Smile. Smile. Everything was awesome. Smile.
Her world had become dull and meaningless. Drained of all true joy it was but a husk, a shell, hollow and empty. In her hopelessness, as her body seemed to move on it’s own, her mind prayed out to the Sun, then the Moon, and even the Star. Of course they didn’t answer her prayers. Why should they? Wasn’t this exactly what they wanted, what she wanted? Wasn’t this a true and perfect Harmony?
Why did she ever wish this? What an absolute foal she had been; a naïve little filly with a head full of stupid little idea. Everything is awesome. Everything is cool when you’re part of a team. Everything is awesome, when you’re living our dream. Smile. Always smile.
She could feel her mind regressing. Slipping. Fading. If she had the mental energy left, she’d probably wonder if this was some kind of self preservation; her inner self trying to protect itself by retreating further into itself. In one last act of desperation she prayed again; this time not to the deities of harmony, but the beings of chaos. She had hated them, thinking them no more than disruptive beasts who stood against everything she held steadfast to as good and pure. Now look at her. What did she even stand for? All this misery? Now they, who she spent too long shunning, were her last hope. Thinking about it, she hadn’t even bothered to learn their names, blindly hating them out of righteous indignation. Still, she prayed. She prayed out to Chaos. She prayed until she felt weak. She prayed as she collapsed onto the dirt road outside her home. She curled into a ball, crying and screaming, her legs held close to her body; and still she prayed.
Suddenly, she stopped; the realization of what she had been doing finally catching up with her exhausted mind. She was crying. No more smiling, no more singing, no more dancing like a puppet on strings. She was free. Shakily getting to her hooves she looked around. The world still seemed dull, the colors muted, but around her other ponies stood confused as well. Some hugged, some cried, others just lay on the grass, enjoying the peace.
That was when she saw them, just a ways away. They sat on a hill, having a picnic of all things. She saw the red haired goddess stretch out her arm as vines and trees filled with all manner of fruits and vegetables sprouted from the ground and filled what were before empty fields around the town. She saw the blue haired one busy chatting with all manner of birds and beasts; with small critters hugging him and chittering happily. In the sky above she saw a trail of magenta and large wings, the largest she’d ever seen on a pony. Behind the sky goddess trailed clouds, breaking the ‘perfect’ weather with the promise of winds both warm and cold and fresh showers to wash away all woes. Starlight Glimmer grinned, a genuine grin from the heart, and she didn’t know if the wetness on her face were her own tears or the lightly falling rain. She saw the dragon, Disarray. He was lounging on the patchwork blanket, his head resting in the lap of the green haired goddess who was softly humming a tune.
Starlight Glimmer could only stare as the gods of chaos stretched their power, putting the world right. She couldn’t believe it. They were here. They had come. They had heard her and answered her prayers. Falling to her knees she began to weep again, feeling as though the last of heavy invisible shackles were falling from her.
“Now, none of that,” a gentle but playful voice spoke behind her.
Starlight whipped her head around and looked up into the face of one of the young gods. This one had wild yellow hair, bright and cheerful yellow eyes, and a smile on their face full of mischief and mirth.
“Look around,” the goddess said “for the age of tears is over, and the sad times are gone and done. Now is the time for celebration! Full of joy and fun!” Leaning in close she added in a gentle whisper “We heard you, through the Order and Harmony we heard your prayer. Because you opened your heart to Chaos, you saved the world”
Poor Starlight Glimmer could hardly process what was said to her. She saved the world? Her?
“Come” beckoned the goddess “Today is a day for festivals and feasts!” and she pulled Starlight onto her hooves and ushered her along. Around them strung on long cords that stretched this way and that were beautiful lights, along with banners and streamers and bells and all manner of joyful things. Tables materialled, heavy with food and drink, and music could be heard all around.
“My Lady” Starlight said meekly “I am ashamed to say, I do not know you”
“Don’t worry too much about that” replied the goddess with a giggle “My name is Party Pop, though I feel that will change soon. In time you will know me and the others very well, for we have a grand plan for you. Questions later, now we party!”
For the first time, in a long time, the residents of Our Town could truthfully say that everything was awesome.
