I came to surrounded by nothing. Literally, I was floating in nothing, surrounded by a blank, white expanse of nothing. I could not tell how far the nothing stretched, because there was nothing to give me any sense of scale. I felt like I should probably start panicking, but I couldn’t quite bring myself to do so.

“So. . . . This is death, then.”

“Nope!” Said a cheerful voice from beside me, and I gasped, jerking in surprise and spotted. . . .

“Pinkie Pie?!” At least, I thought it was Pinkie. She looked a bit. . . .different.

“Do ya like it?!” She asked, enthusiastically, and stepped back, spreading her arms to gesture at her bipedal body, while her ears flicked back and forth atop her head. She was still a pony, but she was now much, MUCH more anthropomorphic than she had been before, with two long, human like legs, two arms and two hands. She was also much, MUCH more noticeably naked than before.

“Um , , , are those D cup?”

“Yeppers! I thought about going bigger, but just the thought made my back hurt!”

“Yeah, no, that’s fine. . . Um, but. . . why, though?”

“Why not?”

And with that reminder not to question the pink pony, I sighed, shaking my head and looked around. “So, if I’m not dead, where the Hel am I? What happened?”

“This place is called the Ether. A veil of mist and shadows that seperates our world from all the multitudinous others that exist out in the cosmos. . . . “ I stared at her, narrowing my eyes suspiciously. “. . . Yada, yada, yada, big words, poetic stuff, whatEVER! Basically, picture this: The multiverse is a great big, triple decker, mega-super-awesome Death-By-Chocolate Cake, and the Ether is the sweet, sweet strawberry-vanilla frosting that keeps it all together!”

Ah, there we go. A much more Pinkie answer.

“So, how’d I get here?”

“Simple, silly! I brought you here!” She giggled and snorted in the most adorable fashion that she had, covering her mouth with one gorgeous hand. She was beautiful, sexy and cute, all at the same time in this form. . . .

“Hehehe! You must like what you see, if you’re getting that turned on!” I went a bit wide eyed, and glanced down, realizing that I was for some reason naked, and now very obviously aroused. She waved a hand at me. “Oh, don’t be embarrassed! It’s perfectly fine!”

I looked away from her, sighing. “But, it’s not though, is it?”

“Fyren?”

I glanced back at the soft, worried sound of her voice. Her eyes locked with mine and I saw a depth of concern in them that I was not due. I shook my head. “I did all of this to myself. All because of these damned. . . . Your world is one of joy, and love and harmony. I mean. . . In my world. . . Um. . . .”

“We’re a kid’s show, yeah, I know.”

I looked at her for a second, then just shook my head with a small laugh. “So, you see. . . what the problem is.”

“Not really, no.” She said, voice gone abnormally calm and serious. I looked at her, seeing a face filled with determination. “I’m guessing you think what’s happened to you now, having Discord try to play mind games with you, all of that . . . I guess you think you deserve it. Right?”

I nodded, glancing away from her. “I didn’t belong in Equestria, Pinkie. It’s a place of purity and innocence. And all I brought to it was corruption and perversion. Objectification.”

“Objectification? Objectification?!” I glanced up, shocked by the vehemence in her voice, and saw her standing right in front of me, eye to angry, blue eye. “So, what? We were all just toys to you? Things to do with as you pleased, is that it? Is that how you looked at me?!”

I looked away, but her hand, surprisingly soft and warm, caught me by the chin and made me meet her eyes. “Well? You better start talking, buster, or I’m gonna get angry!”

I gulped and shook her hand off of me. “I guess, evidently, yes! That IS how I looked at you all. I mean, all I did since my other self started writing this was try to have sex with all of you, in as many obscene, twisted ways possible!”

“And now you’re tearing yourself up about it, huh?”

I looked at her, seeing her anger, and nodded, silently, looking down once more in shame.

When she burst out laughing, I looked up, eyes wide in surprise, before I felt a bit of anger spike it’s way through my despair. “Gee, thanks, Pinkie.”

She waved a hand, bending double and slapping her knees in mirth. “I-I’m sorry, Fyre! S-s-sorry! It’s just. . . Hahaha! It-It’s just, snrrk!” After a minute or so, she finally got her laughter under control and stood up straight, shaking her head and looking at me with bright, shining eyes.

“Okay, first off. . . I know you pretty well, Fyre. Better than you probably think. And, if our world was so ‘Pure’ and ‘Innocent’, I doubt you’d be so big a fan of it! My Little Pony does things that no other kid’s show does, or has done, in, like, forever!”

“Is it okay for you to be this meta?”

“I’m Pinkie Pie, I can do whatever I want!”

I bite back my initial response, mostly because she’s probably right, and sit back. She does have a point. I love the show for many reasons. It’s good, wholesome message is a part of it. But so is the fact that it’s not only willing, but ready to tackle issues like divorce, child abuse and even death, while doing so in an intelligent and thoughtful manner that doesn’t steal anything from the show’s ability to make you smile. It also makes me laugh, cheer, weep and feel. . . . How to describe it. . . . ?
“. . . . Whole?” Pinkie says, softly, and I look up at her, and feel my eyes start to sting with tears. I nod, once again remaining silent. She doesn’t need me to speak aloud for her to know what I’m thinking, anyway.

She smiles softly, and steps up, wrapping her arms around me. I stand there, weeping silently while she hugs me. She leans back, looking me in the eye and nods. “I understand, Fyren, believe me. You feel the show, our show, is the greatest thing to come into your life in a very, very long time, and you’re afraid that your sexuality and so forth might pervert, if not the actual show, then how you view it. Right?”

I just nod, biting my lip as I look anywhere but her eyes. With a little laugh, she tilts my head around to look her in the eyes once again. “Fyre, you silly human. That is such bullshit, and you know it.”

I blink at her language, frowning, and open my mouth to reply, but she puts a finger up against my mouth, silencing me.

“Fyre, you love to watch our show, because it reminds you of what it was like, in some small way, to be a kid again, and to not worry about things. To believe in Harmony, and to know what is right and wrong without having to think about it. But, you’re not a kid, anymore. You’ve grown up, and that’s fine. It’s perfectly normal and natural to do so. And, likewise, it’s also natural for your mind and body to become more sexually active, as you grow up. You love our show, for pure reasons, and you love us, the characters, for the same reasons. You do not objectify us, Fyren. Did you have sex with Flutters?”

At her question I blanched, biting my lip. “N-No. I wanted to, but. . . But it wouldn’t have felt right. It would have hurt her. . . . “

“Exactly! If you were viewing her as an object, you wouldnt’ve cared about her feelings! You’d’ve just done whatever and said to hell with it! When you had sex with Twilight and Rainbow, did you view them as objects? What about Starlight and Trixie?”

“I. . . . I. . . . “

“It doesn’t seem like it, to me!” She said, looking up from a book she suddenly held in her hands, the cover displaying the title and cover of my story. Yes. . . . My story. I wrote it, didn’t I?

“Existential crisis later! Look at me! It’s true, some of the sexy stuff here, and what you had planned for the future might have been a bit sudden, or not so well thought out, but, let’s face it, you’re not the greatest writer in the world, here, bub.”

I opened my mouth to protest, but, simply put, I had nothing. When the pink pony is right, she’s right.

“Exactarooney! Listen, throughout all of it, even when you got kinky and weird with Twi and the others, even when I rutted you into oblivion (sorry about that, btw), you never once forgot that we were more than just characters in a story. To you, we’re friends. Family, even. You love us as much as you do anyone from your real world life, and you would never do anything to hurt any of us. Right?”

I thought about her words for a long, long time, floating there in the white, empty blanket of the Ether. I was so uncertain, about everything. I wasn’t sure what to say, or do with what she had laid out before me. I felt the warmth of her hand, brushing a tear off my cheek, and looked up, locking eyes with her again.

“We all know that you mean us no harm, Fyre. We love you, too, ya know? Without you, and fans like you, we wouldn’t exist, in all our many different forms.”

I bit my lip, and shook my head. “I dunno, Pinkie. Maybe you’re right. But I just don’t know what to do. . . . “

“Simple, silly! Smile! And don’t worry too much about it. Go take a break for a while, write some other small horse words, get your groove back. We won’t go anywhere. I won’t go anywhere.”

With that, she leaned forward, and pressed her lips to mine, the kiss soft and gentle, and tasting of sweet strawberries, cherries and cotton candy all rolled into one. I melted into it, wrapping my arms around her and holding her close. This wasn’t about sex, or pleasure. That was forgotten in the simple warmth and comfort of a friend. Of being close to another, someone, somepony that brought a smile to my face and joy to my heart.

As the kiss broke, I sighed softly, and smiled at her, which made her grin broadly. “Atta boy! Go on and get ‘em, leopard!” I chuckled, stepping back and, with a mischievous glint in my eye, booped her nose.

“I’ll be back, Pinkie. Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!” I said, making the motions, and never had I meant something so much as I meant that Pinkie Promise.

She smiled at me and winked. “And we’ll all be here waiting for you, when you come back, Fyre.”

I nodded, and turned away, seeing a shimmer of what may have been a tear in her eyes before I lost sight of her.

* * *

Somewhere between looking at her, and turning around, I woke up in my closet, back home on Earth Prime. I slowly sat up, feeling that the binds that Eris had put on me were gone now. I took a breath, shaking my head as my bearings reset, and stood, fumbling until I found the doorknob.

I opened up the closet and stepped out into my small, cramped little bedroom. I sighed softly, feeling . . . alone. More than anything, right then, I felt so alone. My heart felt slow and heavy in my chest as I walked over to my desk, my laptop glowing away on it, and flopped into my chair.

Had ANY of that been real? Was it all just a dream? Had I suffered some psychotic episode?

Would I ever see my friends again?

I leaned forward, looking at the story that was written so far on the screen, and blinked, as my eyes scanned it, finding a video file linked that I had not put there. Clicking on it, I was greeted with this:

. . . . . .

I wiped the tear from my eye and smiled softly. sitting back and looking it over. It was only for a little while, and then I’d be back. I Pinkie Promised, after all. And everypony knows better than to break a Pinkie Promise.

Author's Note

To everyone reading, sorry if this got weird, but I didn’t want to leave this arc undone, and I didn’t feel like doing what I originally had planned. I guess I thought; when in need of random, go to Pinkie. XD

Thanks to everyone who’s liked it so far, or left a comment, or added it to their shelves, or just freakin’ read it. I know this is weird, and random, and probably not that well written. It could do with better editing, for sure. But, just knowing that maybe I made someone smile, or laugh, or have any kind of reaction at all is nice to think. I promise you, this isn’t over, I just need some time away to think about other things, for a bit.

And, last but most certainly not least:
Thank you, Pinkie, for always being there to make me smile, even when I don’t really feel like it. I’ll see you soon, Ponka.

Harmonia Resurgent, and keep on rockin’, everypony!