My Random Dream

by ConnVolpe

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Human
Length: 18744

(Hiatus) Random Dreams I've been having in story form as suggested by my friend.

-HIATUS - TO BE REWRITTEN-
This is the story of how I, Connor, came to be in Ponyville and the awkward and slightly confusing encounters I've had.
These are a series of Random Dreams I've had in story form as suggested by my friends. Hence the Random tag…

Occasionally preread by cueno and Keropokemon (of DeviantArt). Thanks!

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2012-09-20 21:17:25 UTC

Prologue: Down the Rabbit Hole

Author’s Note

Sorry about the randomness of this. Basing something like this on dreams isn’t a good way to get a sensible and readable story, especially my dreams. I once dreamt I was a balloon, so… yeah. About 20% of the details are filling in the blanks. My head always seems to skip the little things. Anyway, on with the story.

“Ugh. Damn Sun.” Trying to relax on a hill in 100+ degrees Fahrenheit is not a good way to avoid other people. In fact, it’s definitely up there with the worst ways ever, especially when that hill is next to the one of two lakes in your community. It was getting late in the afternoon, and several of the families that had once sat and chatted amongst themselves were now gone. Only handful of couples remained, the younger ones making out, the elder ones laying down, staring at the sky. I, however, was alone. I liked being alone. I could actually talk aloud without sounding like an idiot, I could think without distractions and most of all, I could relax and be myself. I’m a teenage brony, too busy to contribute anything good to the community and too much free time to not have my parents pestering me about going out with friends, who all seemed to be on holiday or have disappeared.

It was a quiet day today though. Nothing going on, parents occupied with helping my sister with homework. I got time to relax and let my thoughts run away and be free. I closed my eyes and lay back on the soft green grass, acting almost like a pillow. With a blank mind and peaceful attitude, I almost fell asleep. Almost.

Some splashing from the lake went unnoticed by everyone else. I could hear someone gasping for breath as small white arms struggled to keep above water level. I sat up and stared at this oddity, wondering if anyone would do anything about it. No one did, leaving me to be the saviour and rescuer of the small child-like being drowning as I looked on.

I bolted onto my feet as I pulled my red t-shirt off reveal unimpressive physique and abdominal muscles. I’m not fat but I could do with losing a few pounds. They jiggled as I ran and dived into the lake, head first, only to hit my head on the bottom of the deceivingly shallow waters. I cursed my stupidity and eyesight as I crawled my way to the panicking figure. I reached both hands to save them, having both grabbed almost instantly, pulling me under for a brief second. Whatever had grabbed was either heavy or strong but from what I could see, it was quite small. My head was pulled to the bottom, doubling me over and making me tumble under. I hit my head once again, cursing afterwards. Realising you need air to curse, I jolted back out of the water and caught my breath to complete my heroic rescue, feeling that something was off.

I yanked my arms out of the water as I saw something unbelievable flailing on my arms. A small beady-eyed white rabbit. I walked over to the nearby shore and set it down, wondering how on earth it had reached so far out into the lake without almost drowning earlier.

As it coughed and spluttered, I patted it on the back, trying to simulate its gag reflex. When it did, half a cup of water poured out of its mouth and gasped a lungful of oxygen. It started to pant like a dog before calming its nerves and standing up. It crossed its arms and made a sarcastic expression. I looked back at it in amazement, wondering how it could make such a facial expression. After a second or two of wondering, I noticed that it wasn’t a normal rabbit. It was a cartoon-like rabbit that I recognised almost instantly from my many hours of browsing the internet. My eyes widened with the realisation and I started to Hyperventilate.

“You’re…But…Ponies…Real…You.” I managed to stammer, with each breath becoming less useful than the last while my vision darkened. I collapsed onto the floor, conscious but unresponsive to the prodding by the rabbit. It decided to buck me in the face, to no avail. I lay on the grass, trying to comprehend what had just happened. Was it Angel? If it was, then are the ponies real? What if the ponies don’t like me?

Luckily, my questions were answered by a quiet and soft squeak coming from a nearby bush. I turned to glance at the source. It was just a bush, nothing out of the ordinary visually, but a barely audible scream indicated that the bush was inhabited by something, or some pony. I sat upright and raised one eyebrow. If I hadn’t realised which of the many candy-coloured equines was hiding in the bush from the squeaking, I should have realised from who the small white bunny belonged to.

I looked at the bush once again for any signs of life. Nothing. I slowly picked myself up off the ground and shuffled over to the bush. “It’s okay, I won’t harm you. I’m friendly,” I pleaded, arms in the air showing no weapons, “I’m Connor. May I ask your name?” Knowing that the mare was Fluttershy, element of kindness and Ponyville’s pet consultant, I knelt in front of the bush, and pushed branches away to peer into the middle, but nothing was there. I looked closer in disbelief. Where was she? What was the whimpering?

“Ummm…Can I ask what you’re doing, Sir?” a quiet voice squeaked from behind me. It surprised me and a hit my head on a branch in the bush as I tried to withdraw. “Oh my. Are you okay? I didn’t me to scare you like that; I just wanted to ask what you were doing. I’m sorry.” She squeaked once again, almost rushing to my aid, if I were not already out of the bush, rubbing the back of my head.

“It’s fine. I’m okay, really. Anyways, I thought I heard something in the bush. Turns out it was you were instead behind me, ready to give me that shock, eh?” I joked, trying to get on Fluttershy’s good side, “I was going to ask what your name is?” I knew her name already, but I didn’t want to invoke further curiosity or fright out of the fragile Pegasus. Celestia know how that could turn out…

“I’m…” She trailed off, brushing a hoof against the ground, avoiding eye contact. Pretty much her go to move to avoid telling too much to strangers. It was quite awkward to have it happen in person. “I’m sorry. I didn’t hear it too well. Fluttershy, was it? It’s nice to meet you. I’m Connor.” I said with what I thought was comforting smile. She actually looked up at me, only to bend her head down again, with a stifled giggle. Apparently, it wasn’t all that comforting, but slightly funny looking. She covered her mouth with a hoof and muttered a quiet apology. She sat on her haunches and proceeded to stare and kick at a rock on the floor in front of her. I smiled at the timid creature sitting before me and walked over to her. I noticed the rabbit pulling on her pink mane and when she looked the rabbit started pointing at me, making all sorts of gestures, that she seemed to understand. I picked up a few signs as well, and as far as I could tell, he was telling her of his near death experience and how he survived. Holding his nose and squatting meant drowning.  Holding his paws in front of him and raising them over his head meant pulling. And lastly, pointing at me and then, with the back of his paw on his forehead, falling backwards meant I fainted, something I surely didn’t do.

“Hey, I didn’t faint. I just collapsed out of disbelief. It’s not every day you see a semi-famous rabbit and...” I stopped and face-palmed as soon as I realised my mistake. I had just said that Angel was famous, and as a result of that, receive two fairly quizzical looks. I just smiled and avoided eye contact.

“F-famous? How so, umm, if you don’t mind me asking?” Fluttershy asked, still confused. The rabbit was now staring at me with one eyebrow (or whatever it is rabbits have) raised. I almost became hysterical, or at least more hysterical than I already was. How could I make a mistake so early? I had to make up something quick, something believable.

“I think I saw him on TV once. Nature Watch, last week.” I claimed, exaggerating the truth. I had in fact seen a rabbit bearing similar resemblance to Angel on that show. The fabrication was that I wasn’t referencing that rabbit. It was in fact the show I had watched afterwards that had this particular rabbit, and the many Technicolor ponies, inhabiting the world. Unfortunately, only the rabbit seemed to relax and release his baffled expression. Fluttershy just tried to comprehend some part of that sentence. Something about it had made her even more confused. My eyes darted around the room, giving off the impression that I was lying, even though I had only stretched the truth.

“Umm…What’s a TV? I mean, I’ve never heard of it, but it sounds interesting…” Fluttershy mumbled, audible but quiet, going back into her retracted and timid state. I had forgotten there are no TVs in Equestria. It was a stupid mistake and another one that would add to the levels of suspicion Fluttershy would have. I had to confess to Fluttershy. I dropped to my rear and sat fiddling with grass, between my fingers, smiling. I looked up for the first time that afternoon and recognised nothing. It certainly wasn’t the slopes where the couples had once lain. It was flat land, next to a river and just in front a small house sitting on a hill to my right. Fluttershy’s cottage. I gasped at the conclusion I had made. I was in Equestria! I could live every brony’s dream! My jaw was on the ground in sheer scepticism. I was in Equestria!

“Are you okay, Sir?” Fluttershy asked, still giving me a look of bemusement. She seemed to be prodding at my leg and jumped when I finally stopped daydreaming. She squeaked a little and retreated into her shoulders, much like a tortoise. I sighed and looked over to her. This time the comforting mile was automatic and didn’t look funny at all. It actually led to her coming back out and returning a smile.

“No need to keep calling me Sir. Just Connor is fine. And I guess I am alright.” I chuckled. All the fan fictions I’d read told of the character freaking out, and the ponies trying to calm them down. I obviously was close to following half of that tradition, in my beliefs. I wasn’t freaking out just yet, but I was trying to be calmed by a pony. I could count that as a sort of win.

“Anyway, err, Connor. Thank you for saving Angel. I couldn’t have possibly have done it myself.  I’d like to see you again. This evening…if that’s okay with you, I mean. ” Fluttershy continued, realising that I couldn’t explain what one was. She had never heard of it so she probably wouldn’t understand it, or at least, that’s what I thought. She just wanted to speed up a fairly slow conversation. “Oh. Yeah, sure. I’d be more than happy to.” I said, grinning. I was actually being asked to meet Fluttershy, even though I guess I already had. I was on the brink of laughing at that thought but, uncharacteristically, Fluttershy half shouted “Oh, I’m late. I’m late. For a very important date. I’ll have to see you later. I need to meet my friend, Rarity, at Sugar Cube Corner, in town. It was nice meeting you.” And with that she galloped off towards the barely visible town of Ponyville. Angel Bunny didn’t go with her though. He stood next to me in the same disbelief that such a shy pony would run off in a hurry like that. It must have been important. Something I wanted to get through my head, but I was interrupted by a soft ‘yay’. My text alert.

{NEW MESSAGE}

NIALL – received seconds ago.

>Jamie and I heard you dropped into Equestria. Meet me this evening, at Sugar Cube Corner. I’ve got plans.

I read the text without suspicion until I finished it. I caught on a few seconds later. My friends are in Ponyville. I guess it explains their lack of being available. Without a second thought, I set off to Sugar Cube Corner, wondering what their ‘plans’ were, leaving a fairly bemused Rabbit behind. Their last plan, like the many others before, got us banned from our Lunch room. Whatever the plan was, I knew that there was going to be some problem.

Blind Date

I’m lost. I’ve been past Carousel Boutique three times, and had no answer when I wanted to ask for directions. It wasn’t until the fourth time that I realised that I could see the market place, where Sugar Cube Corner resided. When I exclaimed out loud my ignorance, I heard a female giggle. It quickly shut up when I looked around. I was being watched. I slowly crept towards the market place, looking for any sign of movement that may be following me. None appeared so I holstered my curiosity and turned to walk normally towards the Cake’s Cake shop. A small sigh, barely audible, could be heard but I thought nothing of it.

As I passed through town, I noticed several ponies staring at me. I could understand why, but it was still annoying me. If my friends were in town, why are they staring at me like I’m something new? I would have done something about it or ignored it any other time but my mind was on other things. Walking through town by myself gave be some much needed time to think things over.  How had Niall and Jamie got here?  Had they been just as bored or saved some pony from trouble? Knowing them, they’d probably just hit the wrong buttons on their computers. I would be surprised if they didn’t.

I was fairly surprised when I came to spot Sugar Cube Corner over a few of the stalls. It looked exactly like it should have; it was a mirror image of the show’s drawing apart from one small detail. There were a few tables set out in front of the shop, with parasols protecting the few couples that sat beneath them from a fairly intense summer’s heat. I would have cursed Celestia there and then, but I decided against it. I didn’t want to be judged so early in my time here. The couple sitting under the nearest parasol were already giving me a nasty look but I just ignored them. The next few parasols were empty, apart from one pony sitting that I recognised from the show, Bon-Bon. I was slightly surprised to see her by herself as she always seemed to be with crowds, never by herself. The fact that two pieces of the cake were set out suggested that some pony had either stood her up or left to go somewhere.

I quickly notice a very energetic argument going on the second to late table, between two very different personalities that I recognised very well. On one side was my favourite mare. She was girly, fashionable and usually graceful in the show. Rarity. No one really understood why I’d taken to her but I did. She was almost the opposite of me and I often got along with people like that, mostly because I could have fun doing anything. The other was the friend that I usually would go along with. Generally a good friend, Niall and I would always meet up at breaks between lessons to chat. We always had fun, and we’d always exchange a few laughs. He was almost always calm but when he lost his temper, he lost it hard. And it looked like that was what was going on in front of me. Niall and Rarity were having a seemingly passionate argument about each other.

“I really don’t understand why we’re, and more importantly, I’m, doing this…” Niall groaned, rolling his eyes.

“For your simple mind to understand it, I asked her to meet us here so we could arrange this for her. She is fairly shy, you know. She’d never do this by herself.” Rarity responded, pleading to Niall’s usually abundant kindness. She gave him the puppy dog eyes that I’d imagined had manipulated many a stallion.

“So why am I here?”

“You’re my date and I’m yours. Basically, if I’m with some pony, or somebody in this case, hopefully Fluttershy won’t be so nervous.”

“Okay. I think I’ve got that. But still, why do I have to pay?”

“As I have already said twice, your friends are our guests at this dinner, and it is customary for the stallion to pay on a date.”

“But I’m not a stallion and this wasn’t my idea!”

“Frankly, Darling, I don’t give a damn.”

“Why are you the Element of Generosity again?”

I found their heated conversation to be quite humorous, especially the intense stare down that had started at the end of Niall’s question. A quiet snarl could be heard emanating from one of them, but which one was indecipherable. I didn’t want to get in the middle of the problem, as I had learnt from previous experience, but I knew that I couldn’t just stand there and watch them. I decided to stand next to a bush, pretending I hadn’t noticed them. I would wait for them to spot me, and usher me over, if not for the yellow Pegasus that just noticed me.

“Oh, hello. What are you doing here, if you don’t mind me asking?” Fluttershy asked, seeing my attempts to remain incognito from the displeased couple. She glanced over to them and realised my motives. She giggled slightly as I tried to hide behind her. “I know you’re only trying to not get yourself in trouble but your friend looks like he needs your help.” Niall, looking fairly anxious, was slouched in his chair to the irritation of the white mare across from him.

“He looks like he can handle her on his own. I have a feeling I’d only get used by her against him.” I chuckle in reply. She knew I wasn’t about to get in the middle of them and I had a hunch she knew why.  I couldn’t remember whether it was cannon or not, but I always felt that Rarity would be good at inspiration. A lesser known fact was that Rarity was going to be the Element of Inspiration, changed because it was ‘too tough for kids to wrap their heads around’. She always seemed passionate and to have conviction in her efforts, something I admired greatly. I had once gotten in the way of someone determined to be the best at everything. It ended in me receiving a fractured shoulder from a fall, caused by a push from a sore loser. I knew Rarity wouldn’t physically harm me (or I hoped so) but Niall was quite the opposite. He may not have been very physical with me in the past but I’d seen him lose his cool and the consequences weren’t pretty.

“Ugh. Fine. I’ll pay. But don’t let me hear you whining about how I act.” Niall once again groaned. He seemed to be defeated in the argument but he wasn’t going down without the last say. I could see how it would play out if it got any further. Niall moaning, Rarity getting annoyed, tensions riding high. The pair getting annoyed at their friends for not turning up on time even though it was only a few seconds past the time they said they’d meet. It had happened before to say the least. I had to intervene. I sighed and started to walk towards the dispute. Fluttershy followed suit, hidden behind me.

“Hey, Niall. Who’s your friend?” I asked, seeing if I could get at least one side of the tension to lighten. I winked at her for added effect, and the mare giggled and smiled slightly. I stifled a chuckle and looked to Niall who was frowning.  I almost went into hysterics. The look on his face was priceless. A mixture of confusion and disappointment.

“Rarity, darling. Come, sit. We asked you to come here to set up something between you and… Fluttershy? I’m sorry, I didn’t see you there. Anyway, we were going to set up a blind date between you and her.” Rarity explained. It was something hard to take in. I was being set up on a date with Fluttershy. And with that came something else.  I realised why Niall may have been so cranky. Fluttershy is his favourite pony.  I don’t know the specific reason for his attachment to her over other ponies but and they share some very similar traits. Both were quite shy and kind. I occasionally made that link to him when talking about the subject of favourite ponies.

As I took my seat across from Niall and next to Rarity, I realised something was missing. “Niall, where’s Jamie?” I asked, confused at my other friend’s lack of being here. Niall stopped frowning and explained that it was Jamie being Jamie. Sometimes tardy but never too late. He also went on to explain that Jamie was spending a lot of time with Pinkie Pie after their first experimental blind date. They seemed happy for it too. Jamie had recently started to stay with Pinkie overnight, although it was ‘that’ serious. It all made sense. Once again, Jamie was quite similar to Pinkie. Eccentric, probably the youngest of the group, and creative. All traits they have in common. And once again, she was his favourite pony. In retrospect, that was probably why Niall set it up.

I looked around the table as the four of us read menus. The tension seemed to have disappeared for now but I knew at some point it would come back. I could see it in the occasional twitch shown by the both of them. I took the opportunity to look at my own menu. Most names had a list of ingredients afterwards. Daisies and Daffodils appeared more than once.  They were some odd things on the menu, although I suppose they’d be good for ponies. After reading, I just decided to have the same as Fluttershy, mostly because Niall was having the worst possible cake ever. Coffee. I didn’t have anything against the drink but Coffee cake was something I never wanted to try again. It was a few minutes of an awkward silence before Pinkie to come over to take out orders.

“Surprise!” Pinkie shouted in my ear from behind, making me jump and the others sigh. “I knew you were having a friend over and I thought I’d surprise him so, Surprise!” She shouted again, grinning. I looked up in a daze and saw the three of them giggling, even Niall.

“Pinkie, this is Connor. Connor, Pinkie.” Rarity introduced me to the hyper energetic mare, still giggling. I smiled at Pinkie, realising that she was inevitably going to interrupt me if I did. “Hi, I’m Pinkie,” she blurted, “I’m Rarity and Fluttershy’s friend, but you knew that. Silly me.” I nodded in acknowledgement as she suddenly appeared between Rarity and Niall, her hooves around them both, still grinning.

“Pinkie, where’s Jamie? I thought he’d be with you.” Niall asked, looking bored. I’d expected him to be with Pinkie to after the explanation from earlier. Pinkie looked around the table, frowning. By the looks of it, she had expected him to be here, with us. I had a quick glance behind me to check if Jamie was going to shout in my ear as well. It appeared as though he wasn’t. Instead he just walked out of the building, already eating a cupcake. He glanced towards me, chocolate frosting around his mouth, which was turning into a ‘O’.

I started laughing. It may not have been Jamie’s usually behaviour but I could see him doing it in real life. Real Life. It suddenly occurred to me that I might not be able to get back. My parents could get worried. Oh well. Screw ‘em. It’s not like we had anything planned for the next month. But I’d probably have that nipping at me for the rest of the time I was here.

“Oh, I found Jamie. What do I win?” Pinkie asked, gleeful in her discovery. She smiled as she looked for an answer. “You win Jamie for the rest of the evening. He knows he wants it.” Niall joked, grinning at Jamie. Jamie gave him a look of disapproval, as did Rarity. “Niall, why do you tease your friends like that? It seems petty.” Rarity complained, rolling her eyes.

“And you’re not, with your ‘petty’ whining” Niall mocked Rarity’s posh accent, much to the anger of the mare. The tension was coming back, both Fluttershy and I realised it and shrunk in our seats, hoping to avoid the stares from other tables. Staring at her inconsiderate friend, Rarity growled “I wasn’t whining. I was….” “Complaining? And no, we don’t want to hear you whining. You’re annoying enough. I don’t see why I put up with you.” Niall interrupted, being snarky in his comeback. I think the tension broke with that last word as it rolled of his tongue. Rarity’s eye started twitching and she got up from her seat. She sighed and started walking away, muttering something along the lines of ‘we’re through’ as she walked past Niall. He turned and snarled at her, “Fine…”

As he turned around, he met the gaze of the eight eyes now staring at him. “Sorry about that. I guess that relationship is over. Does someone want to go after her?” Niall immediately looked at the floor and clenched a fist. He knew his guilt but he wasn’t going to admit it. A moment passed before Pinkie chirped up, volunteering to go after her. She hopped off her seat and almost yanked Jaime out of his as went passed, “Come on prize, we’re going to cheer up a sad mare.” Jaime looked to me to pull him back before giving up after a fraction of a seconds worth of resistance. He sighed. “Okie dokie lokie.” I stopped myself laughing, realising that Jamie was trying to mimic Pinkie’s voice. As he was dragged away, he turned to Pinkie and asked, “What actually happened?”

Fluttershy was whimpering slightly, trying to avoid any gazes. It only pulled mine in. She looked worried. I could empathise, but I was still trying to overcome my confusion of Rarity’s statement. Niall and Rarity had been going out? It had gone straight over my head. I face palmed as realisation possessed me. The lover’s quarrel, the matchmaking assistance, as well as other things, it should have been obvious. How had I missed it?

I was still confused as I started to blurt out what was on my mind. “Come on, let’s get out of here. I don’t think we need this attention. Can we go to yours Fluttershy?” I was almost surprised when she nodded in acceptation and moved from her seat. She looked to Niall and gestured for him to follow. I don’t think she realised how much that meant to him.

Sugar with Water in it

“What’s this green stuff floating in my tea?” Niall asked, prodding at the specks in the warm liquid. I giggled a little bit. We were sat on the couch in Fluttershy’s cottage while she made some lunch as we had mistakenly forgot to actually eat on the failed lunch ‘date’ which ended with Niall and Rarity breaking up. I still couldn’t believe it.

“I can’t believe you were going out with Rarity…” I laughed. Niall looked up from his hands and sighed. “Why Rarity if you didn’t like her? I mean, you never seemed to like her before. Why not Fluttershy?” I asked, elaborating, hoping to refine his answer and not let him avoid the main details. He turned to face me, scowl adorning his face, and almost impaled me with his stare until it fell to the floor.

“I used her… I used Rarity to get closer to Fluttershy.  I never like Rarity, but if I could make a good impression on her friends, I might have been able to be her’s. I guess I didn’t think about how Rarity would take it, eh?” he joked, smiling trough his explanation. I could see that he wasn’t lying from the body language. He was slouching, sighing, annoyed et cetera. I sat back and soaked it in. I understood his plan near perfectly, it was just the fact that he had chosen Rarity as the friend he would use. It didn’t seem all that wise, especially when they had conflicting personalities. I’m sure he would have seen that too, but perhaps I overestimated him. It was always me who analysed people, Niall was more the trust everybody, judge nobody type.

Fluttershy son walked in with bowl of salad on her back. She set it down in the corner and waited for a speedy rabbit to almost dive into the bowl before she came to sit with us. With a smile on her face, she turned and planted her rear on the cushions of the sofa. I moved along a bit to give her more room but she just shuffled the same way as me. I wasn’t squashed but I was wondering why she had just moved. Niall saw her move and shuffled slightly less toward me. There was almost a full cushion unclaimed on the other end of three-seat sofa. It was then I realised that an awkward silence was forming. It happened way too often for my liking.

“Thank for the tea.” I exclaimed almost randomly, inciting both Niall and the yellow Pegasus to look at me. I put on a fake smile and they returned to whatever they were doing before. “How do you think Rarity’s doing?” I asked, still trying to avoid silence.

“I think she’ll be over it. She doesn’t usually dote on relationships, ever since the Gala incident.” Fluttershy mumbled, causing me to lean to hear her clearly. When she turned to look at me, we bumped noses. We both recoiled and blinked a few times. We weren’t sure what happened. But Niall seemed sure we’d kissed. He looked at me, narrowing his eyes. He seemed almost repelled by the accident and open is both to say something until I interrupted him.

“I didn’t mean that.” I snapped, trying to disrupt his thought patterns before he could formulate a sentence. Fluttershy was rubbing her nose and looked at me. She giggled as she turned away and immediately looked sorry. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to giggle.” she apologised.  She looked up to me with puppy dog eyes. It might as well have been the stare, because I couldn’t say no to that face. “It’s okay. You didn’t have to apologise. I found it a bit funny too. It’s not every day you accidently bump noses with some pony.”

Niall, still annoyed, grunted and left to go outside. Fluttershy turned to go after him but I caught her before she got up. “I think he just needs to calm down. His emotions are still on a high.” I explained, knowing the best methods for dealing with Niall. Fluttershy returned to her seated position as Niall continued walked towards the door. As he pushed it open, he gasped and was almost trampled by what had spilled in. Two drunks, laughing their rears off. Jamie seemed to be riding Pinkie, jabbing her in the side with his heels, as she reared up and whinnied. He fell off straight after, rolling on the floor hysterical. The pink mare was just as hysterical but she also seemed to be handling whatever intoxicating substance they were on better than Jamie was.

“Oops, did we interrupt something?” Jamie snorted, staring up at us from the floor. Niall gave him a look of disappointment and he curled up into foetal position. He looked glum; he was no longer giggling and was now pouting. It was quite pathetic sight. Pinkie saw the downcast look on his face and seemed to almost burst into tears herself. She shuffled over to Jamie and tried to draw his attention with a few nudges and lastly, a peck on the cheek. He just groaned and rolled over, clutching his head. She looked slightly upset. It was obvious to me that Pinkie actually cared about Jamie, or at least cared about what happens to him.

“What’s the matter, frowny face?” Pinkie asked, almost touching Jamie’s nose with her own. She was staring into his squinting eyes. Pinkie tilted her head to the side, her ears folding. She tutted and gave him another kiss on the cheek. She walked away, mumbling something to herself. She disappeared into the kitchen and, I assumed, caused some very odd noises. I’m not sure how construction noises could come from a kitchen. Fluttershy didn’t seem to know either, but seemed less concerned than I was. I’d probably need more than just a minutes worth of dealing with her to adjust as well as her.

“Where’d Pinkie go?” Jamie moaned, still holding his head. “And why do I feel hung-over?” Jamie had somehow moved to sit himself up against the wall. He was slumped slightly and seemed to be suffering from the symptoms of a hangover. He groaned and tried to stand up. He accomplished regaining his balance but fell to his knees with a single step. He still held his head in his hands and moaned a little bit. He was definitely suffering the effects of intoxication.

“To answer the first question, she’s doing something in the kitchen. I can’t answer the first, but I believe you were intoxicated on some substance or other.” I replied, stating all the details that I cared to. If I said that he burst in riding Pinkie, he may have taken it the wrong way. Unlike Niall, he also didn’t mind the NSFW side of the fandom, and even joked about it. It was why I was willing to and planning to spend 2 hours in a car travelling to and from a smoky warehouse-like laser tag area to ‘’battle’ a range of people from 5 year old boys to 45 year old dads. Or as I called it, ‘Fun’.

It was seconds before Pinkie came out of the kitchen carrying only a glass of water and a small leaf of some sort of salad. It took me by surprise. Water and Salad. That’s what all the noise was about. My jaw almost dropped to the floor when she put it down in front of Jamie and provoked him to grab it. Water might help hangovers but Jamie was way too young to drink. He hadn’t had he? Pinkie planted her plot on the nearest cushioned surface and sat staring as Jamie took a small sip from the glass. He immediately put the glass down and bounced to his feet, mouthing something in disbelief. My jaw dropped again, just as it had wound itself back up. He seemed to have the drunkenness thrown out of him as he shook his limbs and started bouncing in a Pinkie Pie like manner, going out of the door. Something had given him a shot of energy. God knows I could use something like that. It was getting late and I hadn’t had much more than a can of Pepsi and bowl of cereal since that morning. And oddly enough, saving a rabbit from a watery grave, getting transported to a land full of Technicolor ponies and putting up a grumpy friend really takes it out of you.

“Pinkie, can I have one of ‘those’?” I asked, pointing towards the glass that remained rooted to the floor while Jamie knocked it whilst bouncing. Pinkie looked towards the glass and giggled. “That?” she chuckled, “That’s just Sugar silly…” I raised an eyebrow in confusion. How could that be Sugar? It was a clear looking liquid. It was water, wasn’t it? “Sugar, with a Pinkie twist.” She grinned, as she bounded to her hooves and skipped to the kitchen, “Water. It’s Sugar with water in it.” I face palmed and started to laugh. I’d learnt the first time to take Pinkie’s antics to heart, so that’s what I did. Pinkie came back after a few seconds of construction noise with another glass of ‘sugar’.

I took a sip expecting something sugary. Immediately I wanted to spit out the salty liquid in my mouth back into my glass, but I swallowed, sending shivers down my spine. “This isn’t meant to be salty is it?” I groaned, trying to regain any moisture in my mouth. She just laughed and face hoofed. “Oopsie.” She laughed, in a sarcastic manner, “Jamie said you knew when you were being messed with. I asked Fluttershy in the kitchen and she said fine. I knew she would say fine but-"

“Fluttershy in the kitchen? No she right…here?” I interrupted her mid-sentence for belief that Fluttershy was right next to me. Yet she had not been for a while evidently. “Pinkie did she say she was going somewhere?” I was slightly worried. Although Fluttershy usually avoided conversation with those she didn’t know too well, it was unlike her to leave when she had guests. For some reason, the first thought that popped into my head about this was that ‘it’s very uncouth.’ Pinkie looked deep in thought when I looked back to her, after looking at the recently evacuated seat next to me. “Oh, sorry I was thinking how I got the Salt and Sugar mixed up. It’s happened before but-” she said, snapping out her day dream. I once again interrupted her, trying to get her to spill the imperative beans on where the Pegasus had gone.

“Oh, she went to Rarity’s to check up on her. I wonder if she went for the high caffeine drink we had. It was really yummy, even if Jamie got the jitters. I had the jitters once but I think it was from something other than caffeine.” Once again, Pinkie was daydreaming or recalling memories or something. But I couldn’t wait for her to finish, Fluttershy had gone off and as her ‘friend’ (that word got me every time I thought it, I’m friends with a pony), I would need to go after her.

I raced out of the door and bounced backwards as I hit the wall in front of me. I groaned, spread eagle across the floor. Once I regained enough composure to stand up again, I felt myself being dragged to my feet by a taller being, Niall. “Why are you in a rush? What’s wrong?” Niall, calmer than his previously stroppy form, had blocked my way out. He looked concerned and I had no reason to hold back any details from him.

“Fluttershy, Carousel, Gone, Rarity, Missing, Find her!” I spurted out, in a rush. I couldn’t say I tried to give him all the details, but I wanted to find her hopefully before she got to Rarity’s just so I could ask her why she ran off. At this rate, she might have already gotten there, so I ran off without a second though, leaving Niall to cough up dust and chase after me.

It wasn’t moments until he caught up considering I ran to Sugar Cube Corner to ask directions, only to find that the only pony to give me direction was a still lonely Bon-Bon. Sitting at her table, still waiting for some pony. She seemed to be sobbing and I should have stopped, but going to random stranger and asking them what was wrong never seemed to pay off. Usually, I was given the finger (although I suppose she couldn’t give me the finger) and told to mind my own business, something I still had to do. As I went left her to wallow in whatever ponies wallow in, I heard her mumble something about Lyra and her obsession to find something. That’s when I spotted Niall in front of me; he had taken a shortcut through the school I was guessing.

As I continued to run, I tried to catch Niall up. I would have had him just as I passed out of the market place, except I was tackled into an alleyway. My head bounced off a nearby wall that I had flown into in my attempt to dodge the tackle. I groaned and my consciousness faded as a bump formed on my head. With one last glance, I memorised what few remaining senses were doing. Something brushed against my leg, I heard a whimper and lastly, I saw a mint green flash…

Lyra and Love Lost

“OhmigoshOhmigoshOhmigosh”

Ugh, why are my eyelids heavy? They feel like 16 tonne weights.

“I can’t wait to tell Bon-Bon she’s wrong. She’s never wrong. I finally get to do my ‘I-was-right, you-were-wrong dance.'”

Huh? Who’s there??

“They’re moving! He must be waking up. I’ve got to hide the camera…”

“Ugh, what a dream. I thought I was in Equestria…” I sighed, stretching my arms. I yawned as my eyes slightly opened to reveal a mint green pony, smiling awkward at me.

“You are in Equestria, silly.” She giggled, still grinning in an odd manner. She planted her plot on the stone floor and stared at me. It was very odd to say the least. She’d always been hyper-energetic about things like this in the fan fiction and the comics but I never thought she’d actually be like that. Lyra Heartstrings, lifetime human fanatic. It never came across me that she’d actually be here try to talk to me.

“Ummm, yeah. I am, aren’t I? I guess I’ve got to go. Bye.” I didn’t want to spend ages with Lyra, I had to find Fluttershy. But Lyra obviously didn’t have the intention to let me go yet, blocking my way out of the moon-lit alleyway in which we were sitting.

“No! I mean, no. Please, I’ve spent all week trying to talk to somepo- someone about you. Actually, funny story, I’ve been trying to work up the courage to talk to you or your friends since this morning. I actually ended up hiding in a bush to avoid you.” She faked a chuckle at the end of her sentence, just to make it seem like she thought it was a ‘funny story’. It wasn’t.

“So you’ve been following us around? Like a stalker?” I asked. I knew it was an unfair question that she could either tell an unbelievable lie to or an irresponsible truth. She just sat there, her lip quivering as she realised her misdeed. Her eyes grew watery and she started to pout. I think she was about to cry. I didn’t need that on my conscience.

“Hey, look. I didn’t mean it. We’re talking now. Calm down, okay? It was a joke. I’m laughing. See.” I chuckled dryly, faking it every part of it. It wasn’t a joke but I didn’t want a blubbering pony on my hands. She looked up at me with damp patches of fur around her eyes and smiled. She giggled. “I think my fake laugh is better than yours.” She grinned, almost immediately turning off the waterworks. I couldn’t help but smile. I got played by a pony.

“I don’t think it is… Anyway, what’s your name?” Reading people’s next move was not one of my strong suits, so I had no idea when she started to talk about herself in fairly deep detail. I found out a few things I hadn’t known before, Bon-Bon was her roommate and was trying to get her to move into the same bedroom, but Lyra didn’t want to because of personal reasons, she had played at every Grand Galloping Gala since she was thirteen, except last years because Bon-Bon was bedridden, and Lyra cared for Bon-Bon more than she had cared for any other pony before. But I couldn’t help wonder, did Lyra know she had stood Bon-Bon up at Sugar Cube Corner?

“Bon-Bon was at Sugar Cube Corner today.” I had interrupted her midway through talking about how she’d discover humans. She’d found a book in her Dad’s library or something like that. She didn’t seem too concerned about it but she’d apparently started to tell me her life story. But at the mention of Bon-Bon, she looked fairly guilty.

“Oh, no” she whispered to herself, “Bon-Bon. How could I forget?” She’d immediately gotten up and sighed. “Connor, I hope I can see you again but I’ve got to make something up to some pony special. See you.” She leant in, gave me a kiss on the cheek and suddenly ran off, toward the centre of town. I sat there stunned. She just kissed me… Why would she kiss me? Didn’t she just say that Bon-Bon was her special some pony? Blushing, I slowly lifted myself up off the floor and crept towards the exit of the alleyway. Luna’s night sure was beautiful. The largest light source was a glistening white orb, surrounded by the twinkle of many smaller-looking stars. It was everything compared to the night sky I used to stare at. I think knowing that someone (or in this case, some pony) has put so much effort into every little detail raises your appreciation for them and their work.  I would admit it but Luna was definitely the mare I wanted to meet for real. I know how it felt to be left alone (although I’m sure she didn’t enjoy it as often I tend to).

Without realising it, I was already on my way to Rarity’s Carousel Boutique. It was the one place in Ponyville I had made sure to memorise. That way if I got lost (again), I knew where I was if I could reach Carousel Boutique. It was a silly thing that only someone like me would actually use, because of so many other factors. The real truth about it was that I’d memorised where certain things in Ponyville were, in distance from Carousel Boutique. That was the simplest way I can explain it, without going into detail. Anyway, I’d passed Sugar Cube Corner as soon as I’d spotted the Carousel, and a figure running off into the distance as I approached. I looked for the figure, disguised by darkness, believing it to be their friend. It was, for now, while I chased them with no knowledge of what could await me.

As I ran through near pitch black darkness, I tried to draw up some conclusions on what had happened over the course of the afternoon I had spent. I had arrived in Equestria after saving a rabbit, I had eavesdropped on my friend’s slightly awkward conversation, I had been on a blind date that had resulted in the matchmakers breaking up and finally I had seemingly upset one of them further by accidently bumping noses with some pony he’d liked. Most of this was because of me and what I’d done since arriving. I had to do something to make this up to every pony when I could. But for now, that was some odd fantasy that I was entertaining. I couldn’t think of that right now, I was following a very elusive pony, which was seemingly heading South West, towards one of two collections of trees that I knew to be near Ponyville.

It took a while but the chase came to an anticlimactic end. After another moment or two, we reached the edge of town. As far as we’d gone, I had only got nearer and nearer to the pony, who I could clearly spot as a pegasi, due to the appendages currently sticking up at the sides of the whimpering pony. The whimpering was distinct and recognisable enough to almost confirm my suspicions. But I still had to be sure, even if a squeaking Pegasus running through a farm that only a few could know how to navigate wasn’t clear enough. I still had to see for her myself. If only rotten apples lying on the ground weren’t so slippery. I fell over in a fairly comical manner, arms flailing at my sides until brought them down onto the floor with a thud. A break fall. Something I had been grateful to learn at age 5 as balance when moving wasn’t very good, even now my foot-eye coordination was off. As I lay with my head in mush and a fleeing Pegasus escaping, I realised that must get up, but I found myself staring at the Prussian blue sky in all its glory.

But enough of that, I still had a duty to my friend, even if I’d only known her for a few hours. I picked myself up and observed the orchard for any movement. My eyes weren’t betraying me, just missing everything that I could use them for. Nothing even flinched apart from the leaves in the gentle breeze. It was my ear that proved most useful yet again as I was in hearing range of several snapping twigs and a small whisper.

Sensing the direction she had fled to, I followed her once again through pitch blackness, knowing not where the chase would lead. Thoughts of what I’d actually do when I caught the pony came to me as I dodge countless trees in my attempts to close the distance. It was clichéd that I hadn’t thought it through. But that didn’t matter if I didn’t catch up. They were gone from sight and only their panting led me to them. I was so close, but it stopped, leaving me blind. My only lead gone, I was left to stumble around the apple orchard, trying to navigate.

That was when I heard sobbing. Heart-wrenching sobbing. Sobbing that I couldn’t for the life of me ignore, I had the investigate it. I blocked out everything else, to focus on the origin of the distracting noise. I figured out where it was coming from and thought this couldn’t get any worse. I was wrong. With each few steps I took, the sobbing grew louder and more tear-jerking.  I believe I shed a tear when I was close. I peered left and right when I’d come to the fence. She’d escaped Sweet Apple Acres, but only seemed to have hidden rather than escape further.

As I climbed over the solid wooden fence, I noticed something flinch in between some nearby bushes. As I approached, I heard a slight gasp as two yellow ears pricked up in front of me. I stopped in my tracks as I awaited her unintentional permission to get closer. Her ears relaxed and she sighed, body language for ‘fine, come on over.’ I crept into view of the pony, looking up from between her hooves, her blue eyes able to melt any heart given the chance.  A crystal-like tear on her cheek as she quietly sobbed into her mane.

“May I sit?” I asked, knowing that I wouldn’t get a worded response. She nodded, barely noticeable behind her mane. I crossed my legs as I sat beside her. I remained in her line of sight and softly rested a hand on her back against my better judgement. She whimpered slightly when it was on but she seemed to try and keep it when I tried moving it off. “It’s okay. I’m here to help. Now tell me, what’s wrong?” I asked, leaning towards her and trying to coax her face out from behind her mane. A mumbling noise became audible and I only understood a few words. “…just…friend…like…upset.” She whimpered once again and stopped. “Fluttershy, please speak up. I can’t help if I don’t understand.” I stated, using a fairly commanding voice. I had previous experience with non-cooperating friends with problems.

She opened up from her ball slightly but she still hid her face behind her mane. “It just, if it’s okay, your friend, I think, he likes me and I like him but I made him upset. He stormed out and I feel terrible. I want to make it up to him.” She murmured, once again barely audible. I understood it instantly. Niall did like her, and I’m sure he’d shown it, but I wasn’t sure how much Fluttershy knew about Niall’s fancy. He wasn’t the type to harbour desirous feelings for fictional characters, nor did he like the more grisly and lewd side of the fandom. But I definitely had a hunch that if any pony took his fancy, it would be her.

“Connor, umm, are you okay?” Fluttershy asked, waving a hoof in front of my face. She was staring into my eyes and appeared to have finished her story. “You’re scaring me.” She shrunk back into her mane, her face previously centimetres away from my own. When I moved once more, I realised I’d faded away into thought. I would apologise but doing it so suddenly might make her flinch. I leant back slightly and sighed. I had to make it happen. My idea would allow Niall to get what he wants, and Fluttershy to get want she wants. It may be a stupid idea but if it worked, every pony would be happy, although I may regret it. It may have been my only chance, but I’d have to severe ties to make it work. Even though we’d been set up, and I didn’t know how she felt or what she thought of us, but I had to friend zone her.

I told you it was a stupid idea.

Author’s note

If any pony thinks of a better title for this chapter, feel free to tell me. I came up with the name before I finished and now I can’t think of one that actually suits it. Also, I hope that you’re all enjoying this but I regret to inform you that if the dreams don’t start up again, I’ll have to put it on hiatus until they do. Please tell me if you don’t mind me making it up from here, because so far all I’ve had to make up were minute details and a few lines of dialogue.

Regret

Author’s Note

Sorry this is a few hundred words short; I’m running out of material. The next chapter will be the last because that will be everything gone. I’m going to test something before I start making things up because… well, I don't want it falling to any more of a shambles than it is already is. Hope you enjoyed this any who so thanks…

“Y’know Fluttershy, I’m sure Niall would love to meet you again, he just missed interpreted when we bumped noses. His only fault is caring too much” I told Fluttershy, making Niall sound as nice as possible. If my plan to try to set them up together would mean I’d have to bend the rules a little but since a lot of things in the world are already different, hopefully nice guys don’t finish last. She smiled and tilted her head. “I’m sure you would get along. You’re very similar and it sounds like he likes you.” I thought about what I had said for a second only to I realised it wasn’t a total lie, and I really did think they’d get along but I found myself unable to believe what was coming out of my mouth.

She blushed, but didn’t hide it like I expected her too. If that was a sign for anything, I though it to be a sign of interest. “You really think so. I think I like him. I’m glad he likes me too. Thanks Connor.” She lifted herself to her hooves and walked to my side. She turned and wrapped her hooves around my neck and nuzzled my neck slightly. “Thanks for everything. You’re a good friend.” As she hugged me, I returned the hug and faked a smile. I think I just got friend zoned by her, or at least that’s what it felt like. I think I was regretting it slightly. I thought I’d even seen Niall smiling from behind a nearby wall. It wasn’t until I blinked that I realised I wasn’t hallucinating. I think he was just eavesdropping, but I think he’d have to explain himself when I was through with Fluttershy and my regret…

“You too. Now, if you don’t mind I want to have a chat with someone about… something.” I released her from my grasp as she did the same. I looked into her eyes and smiled. Yeah, I was regretting it. How did I just let possibly the kindest mare imaginable go and hook her up with my friend? It was an incredibly stupid thing I’d just done. As I got up, Fluttershy did too and she casually trotted away, a skip in her step.

“Fluttershy” I called out, almost planning to take back what I said. She turned and looked at me with her kind eyes and I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. I was being stupid; I just tried to set her up with Niall and if I tried to get her back now I wouldn’t just be harming myself. “See you soon.” As she returned to walking away, I found myself thinking about stuff. Most of all, I found myself thinking about how I hated to see her go but loved to see her leave. I shouldn’t have thought that at all. I put it down to regret, tiredness and possibly the side effect of my sugar crash after the sugary water, or possibly watery sugar.

“Connor, I was just coming to find you…” Niall said, walking over to me and standing beside me, “but I see you’re how the plot of your dream is developing.” He chuckled when he noticed that even after berating myself, I was still fixated on Fluttershy as she walked away. I blushed when I realised what I was doing. I mumbled something, making it inaudible to Niall. He realised I’d said something but ignored it. “Anyhow, I still want to talk to you about… well, things.”

I looked towards Niall to find him scratching the back of his head and looking nervous. “It just, I think I came across too strong and I wanted to apologise about my actions” Niall murmured, “After breaking up with Rarity, I just wanted something to fill that void. Even if I used her, I still liked her. She’s my second favourite pony after all. But still, I went for the one mare that I’d always liked and had planned to get. It wasn’t until you barged past me that I realised that I’d set you two up together. So, I just wanted to say I’m sorry and that she’s all yours…”

“Not anymore. I kind of just stopped seeing her” I said, chuckling. Maybe he hadn’t overheard us. “I actually just set you two up. Figured you needed some pony to show you some kindness.” Niall gave me a stare of amusement. I sighed, considering that I should have known that he’d do this. “Niall, don’t do anything stupid. I’m really regretting what I just did so don’t think I wouldn’t be waiting for you to mess up.” As Niall shifted to a now thoughtful position, I shook my head and walked away, hoping to not get called back for any reason and just go back to Fluttershy’s place. I figure that even if I had set them up, I could ask Fluttershy for a place to stay the night. She’s hardly the mare to say no to some pony in need.

“I guess I didn’t need some pony, I guess just needed you. Figures that I wished for the element of kindness, and you’re here now.” Niall chuckled as he looked at me leaving. I stopped but didn’t turn. “Shame I didn’t realise that earlier… It would have saved me making so many mistakes here, trying to get close to Fluttershy.” He was playing for the sympathy vote and I knew that it would be wrong to not take the bait, as obvious as it was that I was trying to get away.

“I guess it would have. So you want to do something tomorrow” I asked, thinking about what I’d do, because today had been nothing but go one place or another and usually watch something bad unfold in front of us. Tomorrow, I wanted to sort everything out so I could actually stay here a while. I needed to find Twilight maybe and explain myself. I looked to Niall and he looked deep in thought. “Something on your mind?” He looked down to me and returned a smile.

“Actually, I can’t. I’m going to make sure Fluttershy knows about my feelings. I was thinking about hanging with some pony tomorrow and she said she was free for a chat. You’ll probably recognise her.” Niall smiled and looked through his pocket. He handed me a note with a time and place on it. “If I see her, I’ll tell her you’re going to swing by. Otherwise, try to put up with her. She’s a little brash and I know for a fact that you were warming up to her before. See you tomorrow night maybe. If all goes well, maybe we’ll double up again.”

Niall winked and walked off nonchalant, starting humming a fairly recognisable tune. I thought about what it was for barely a second before I began to wonder if any pony could hum anything else. Still thinking about what tomorrow would hold for me, I set off to ask Fluttershy for a place to sleep...

Introduction

“Hello, little Birdie. What are you doing in here?” I asked, eyes closed and smiling at the calm wake up call. As the bird tweeted, I took a breath of morning air trying to remember what had happened the night before. I remembered talking to Fluttershy and getting ultimately friend-zoned by her when I was setting her up with Niall. I immediately started regretting it again. I groaned and rolled to the side, and fell. A one foot drop never hurt so much. I moaned in discomfort and cracked open my eyes slightly to see the sunrise. It’s like I’m not looking out a window, I thought, until I realised there wasn’t a window, nor a wall, nor a bed.

Figures I wouldn’t make it to her house, I’d fallen asleep on a bench and was currently on my side on the floor. I wouldn’t have been too self-conscious of my position if I didn’t spot three pairs of eyes staring at me from a bush. At first, I thought it to be Lyra but then I realised that neither does she three pairs of eyes nor purple, green or orange eyes. I also realised that Lyra probably wouldn’t have such high-pitched giggles. Whilst I lay there on the cobble path, I took my turn to eavesdrop.

“Ah told you. He’s new. He ain’t any of the ones that have been hanging out with ma sister’s friends.”

“Yes, we get it. But who is he then? Rarity only said that there were two of them.”

“He looks sad. Maybe we should help him.”

“And get close to him? He might try to attack us.”

“What are ya, Chicken?”

“Don’t answer that. You remember what arguing with Apple Bloom got me.”

“Well ya are a chicken.”

“Am not!”

“Prove it!”

I groaned again, hoping to frighten them off. Instead of running away, one of them came out of the bush, also groaning. Scootaloo. She slowly and cautiously walked over to where I was laying, stopping when she was only centimetres away from my face. She lifted one of her hooves up and prodded me in the chest. I coughed involuntarily and she jumped slightly. I heard snickering from the bush, and a low growl from the filly in front of me. She prodded me once again, pushing me onto my back. She leant in closer, noticing that I was still breathing. She sighed in relief that I was in fact not dead. She hadn’t noticed that I was now staring at the strange actions she was performing on me and it came as a shock when I asked her “May I help you?”

She jumped and fell onto her haunches in fright. I used the pause to sit myself upright and yawn. It must have been contagious as four seconds of deep eye contact later, she also yawned. He chuckled slightly as I realised the similarities between home and Equestria. It always the little things that matter in making me feel safe and secure. She gave me an odd look before turning to look at her friends. From what I could see, it looked as though the fillies in the bush were encouraging her to carry on. She looked back to me and sighed.

“Could…Could you help me up, maybe?” I smiled, looking into her grayish-purple eyes and pouting. She looked at me, slightly confused at what I was doing. I gestured for her to take my hand and pull me up. She rolled her eyes and held out her hoof. I latched on and pulled. I managed to get off the floor, only to pull Scootaloo down when I slipped. Two loud gasps could be heard as she landed with a thud on top of me, her chin hitting my shoulder, cushioning the impact for her. My head, however, received a full blow as it hit the floor. I groaned once again and went dizzy.  I shook my head to relieve it of its pain, only to gain a headache. This wasn’t my day, and it had only just begun. I looked to Scootaloo, checking she was okay. She was rolling about on the floor, giggling. I started to chuckle and sat up. At least, some pony was enjoying this morning. She was rolling about for a few seconds until she stopped and wiped away a tear of joy from the corner of her eye. “Are you done laughing at my misery,” I asked. She looked up from her hysterical stupor and laughed a bit more.

“Well, some pony has to laugh at it.” I rolled my eyes at the comment and pulled myself up onto the bench. I self-righted to a sitting position and smiled. I moaned in agreement as she sat on the bench too. “You sit a lot like one of the other ponies in town. Liar, I think her name was?” I could help but almost fall of the bench at the mistake Scootaloo had made.  She looked at me oddly, clearly ignorant to her mistake. I was almost copying the hysterical laughing and rolling about that Scootaloo had demonstrated only a few seconds ago. She groaned in annoyance as I wouldn’t stop laughing.

“Are you quite done?” I looked up at the confused and slightly agitated filly, who was giving me a nasty glare. I took a few seconds to calm down and got to my feet. I looked down on her, being almost double her height. I began to speak but she ran off, towards her friends after checking I was alright.

“Come out, guys. He’s not that bad.”

“I don’t know, he seems… quirky.”

“Ah have to agree with Sweetie there. Do you even know his name?”

“It’s… I dunno.”

“Beg ya pardon. Ah didn’t quite catch them.”

“I said I dunno. It might be Calvin, it was on his underwear.”

I seemed to have added to Scootaloo’s problems, and she’d not run away, so I could at least repay her with introducing myself. It also meant more than three ponies knew my name.

“I’m Connor. Don’t worry I’m not here to hurt any pony. I’m harmless as long as no pony is being an idiot.”

The fillies all went silent and began to look at each other. They slowly huddled together and conferred with each other, leaving me feeling left out. I overheard a couple of sentences, such as “What does it mean?”, “Is it bad?” and “Go on. Ask him. You’re the dictionary.” Finally, Sweetie Belle broke from the group and faced me to ask something I was definitely not prepared for.

“What’s an idiot?” As innocent as the question was, I couldn’t help but smirk. But I bit my lip when I realised I had to explain it. I was apparently standing there for a while, as Apple Bloom proceeded to prod me and wave her hoof in front of my face. It took me a while but I phased back into my situation.

“Let’s see. Idiots are things that fit either one of a few descriptions. The first being something ignorant and… the opposite of Twilight, I guess.” I looked up to see if it had gotten through. Sweetie and Scootaloo were sitting with blank stares while Apple Bloom was stroking her chin.

“Ya mean stupid, don’t ya?” I nodded and she grinned at her friends. They looked back confused. It was quite humorous, in addition to the dialogue that followed.

“I told you she was the dictionary and not me.”

“You’re both dictionaries. Deal with it.”

“Better a dictionary than a chicken.”

“I’m not a chicken!”

“And Ah’m not a dictionary.”

“Guys, let’s face it. We’re a group of two dictionaries and a chicken.”

I was laughing my head off. I had once called a team that exact phrase, ‘Two dictionaries and a Chicken.’ It wasn’t a bad team as well, although we came second to ‘Steel Wench.’

“Do you laugh all the time or what? You’re worse than Pinkie Pie.” Sweetie Belle rolled her eyes and sighed. I smiled and took a breath, while the flies calmed down.

“Anyway, the second meaning, and the one I was inferring was, some pony who is being mean or inconsiderate intentionally.”

“That makes a lot of sense. Ah don’t like ponies like that either. Ah’ve always wanted to buck Diamond Tiara right in her pretty lil’ face. Ah gotta go tell ma big sis some pony new is in town. She’s always the most getalotiest pony in Ponyville.” Apple Bloom grinned and went to run before Scootaloo stepped in front of her. She sighed, turned and laughed. “Ah was kidding. Ah’m sure you want to meet her ya-self. Wanna come?”

I thought about it for a second before brushing my hand over the letter. I still had to meet some pony for lunch and I had a good feeling I knew who it was. “Look lasses. I’ve got to be going soon. I’m meeting some pony for a date slash meet up slash introduction thing, so if you don’t mind, rain check?”

The fillies looked at each other. “We thought we were the first you’d met. How can you be meeting some pony? And who is it?” Scootaloo had stepped forward to speak and I crouched to get to her level. I sighed and shrugged. “Who arranged the meeting then? Surely you have some clue.”

I did. The letter. I could be one hundred per cent sure but I thought I knew. Focusing on Scootaloo so my mind wouldn’t wander, she spoke quite nervously. “It could be dangerous. I should go with you. I know every pony in town like the back of my hand.”

I looked at her with a condescending look, “Yes, I believe Lyra would agree with me that that’s not exactly right.” She turned, coughing to hide her embarrassment. The little thought I had given the mystery seemed to point to one mare in particular. Brash, annoying, I’d said to Niall I’d liked her. Several ponies fitted each part of the description but only two I knew fitted the description, more one than the other. Brash and annoying were probably her middle names. “I don’t know,” I lied through my teeth “but I have a hunch. A letter written by that some pony. I have a feeling you might recognise it.” I took the letter out my pocket and opened it up. I looked at the state of the handwriting. Rushed, very much like mine. I handed it over to Scootaloo and her eye lit up like fireworks.

“So I’ll take it my hunch was right. It’s from her.” I was pretty smug. Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom fought to see the letter and Scootaloo was frozen, apart from her bobbing head. “I think you might as well come with me, it could be dangerous.”

Scootaloo took a while to lift her head to make eye contact and nod again. I chuckled and gesture for us to make our way to a very specific place, ‘near the statue, under the cloud.’

I walked off with Scootaloo following at a trot, leaving the other two fillies in our wake, confused. Scootaloo remained silent apart from the occasional word. After heading towards my destination, Scootaloo pointed out that I was in fact going the wrong way. I let her lead me off. I needed a map or something.

Once we’d arrived I notice that I had in fact gone it complete circle around the place and then went the other way. I noticed a bench and sat down. I noticed that Bon-Bon was watching me when I sat down and she looked confused. When I looked at her, she snapped back to walking away from the statue, muttering something. It wasn’t nothing but I chose to ignore it. I sighed and closed my eyes for a fraction of a second, with Scootaloo curled up next to me. She was cute in this position. I d’awwed a little and gave her some space. I fell off the bench, overestimating the room I had to spare and landed on by butt. I sighed once again and groaned. I got to my feet and noticed Scootaloo had fallen asleep and that the sun had moved vastly from where it was. I’d possibly dozed off on the bench for a few hours and found that a cloud had now drifted over my head. It began to rain.

“Oi! Can you stop that?” I was getting drenched and was now generally annoyed at the Pegasus raining on me. The rain stopped and a head poked out to the side. With drenched hair over my eyes I couldn’t tell who it was, but they were laughing.

“Let me help you.” She swooped down and formed a cyclone around me. A natural blow drier, that blew my hair was out of my eyes, but messed up and curly. I felt like I was having Déjà vu. I saw who it was and found my assumptions proved correct. Looked back to Scootaloo and back to the mare. “Oops I guess I over did it? How about this?”

“No no no no no. Please, no.” I was almost on my knees begging. “No more Rain-blow Dry.”

“Oh, okay... Wait a minute, how did you know it was called a Rain-blow Dry. Did Niall tell you? Are you a spy?”

The Dare

Author's Note

Short Chapter because I was bored. I want to get the rest of this out the way so I can start something else. Sorry, but the next chapter is going to be the last. Hope you've enjoyed these but nothing's come my way since the dreams stopped so... yeah. Thanks for reading and I'll possibly update this in the far future when I have some dreams to go on.

“Yes, I’m a spy.” I rolled my eyes and shrugged, “and now you’ve found me out, I must honour the spy’s code by removing the Princess. Oh, well… Arrividerci.” I waved goodbye and began to walk away from the stunned Pegasus. I could almost hear her disbelief. She began to growl and as I looked over my shoulder, she gave be a deathly stare.

“Not cool” she groaned. I laughed a bit, and she groaned again. “Seriously, how do you even come up with such lies?” She took a few steps towards me, eying me cautiously. “I’ll take it Niall’s out with Rarity again.”

It took me by surprise that she didn’t know. I would have thought Rarity would have told her other friends about the problems that had occurred. I shrugged it off and continued the conversation. “Nah, but he did ask for me to come here. I even brought a note.” I took the note out from under the dozing Scootaloo, who had held on to it for the duration of the journey here. Rainbow Dash looked taken aback by the realisation that Scootaloo was with us.

“You… you brought the squirt along.” Rainbow was ignoring me completely, all her attention on Scootaloo. “What’s the deal? Did she follow you here or did you have a run in with the Crusaders?” She smirked. Celestia knows how many times it had happened to her.

“I fell asleep on a park bench and ended up waking up to the Crusaders staking me out.” I glanced over to Scootaloo, who stirred in her sleep. It elected a small d’aww from me, and until I looked over to Rainbow, I was quite content with how it had happened. She was laughing on the floor, almost crying.

“You woke up on a park bench? Sheesh, don’t you have any friends?” She wiped away a tear forming in the corner of her eye and took a deep breath. I groaned and walked around the bench next to Scootaloo, slightly embarrassed. I looked at the note again and read it again, thinking ‘Niall, what did you get me into?’

Midday, near the statue, under the cloud. Will arrange for tonight.

See ya then, Dashie x

I’d gone over it a few times, while Rainbow calmed down. It took me a while to notice one letter that seemed out of place. I smirked and chuckled a little. I think that Niall has some explaining to do. “Dashie? What were you going to arrange with Niall?”

She shut up almost instantly, her eyes as wide as Luna’s moon. “Nothing. Absolutely nothing.” She wasn’t doing a very good job of looking innocent. She was almost to the brink of sweating. She leant forward and stared into my eyes. “What do you think I was going to arrange?”

“If I had to guess, a date, since you’ve used a pet name and an ‘x’. But that would be silly, riiiiiiiight?” I smirked and stared back. I think I was blackmailing her but I wasn’t sure. She looked nervous. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell any pony as long as you meet me tonight. I haven’t got anything to do, so why not meet up with a good friend?” I was blackmailing her now, if I hadn’t been before. She scowled at me for a moment before narrowing her eyes and grinning.

“Okay, but let’s make it interesting since we’re such good friends. You’ve got to tell me your darkest secret, and it has to be extremely embarrassing. And the chances are that nothing you can give me could be worse than telling some pony about darkest secret” she explained, a hint of cunning in her voice. I was shock at the forwardness of her challenge. I didn’t really ever think about the secrets I have locked away in the recesses of my mind. That’s why I’d take her on, but for her, I could only think of one thing that could make her retreat. “Wear a dress.”

“What?”

“I said, you’ve got to wear a dress. A fashionable one. One that Rarity would wear.” I smiled. She just stood there, trying to speak. “Or you could just wear a sign around your neck saying ‘chicken’. That’s a better alternative, right?” She moaned and bee lining for me. She flew up a few inches and forced her head against mine. She was scowling and growling.

“You’re on.” She shoved me away and I stumbled over. She was gone from sight when I looked around for her. She’d flown off, or so I thought. I looked around for a second time and notice Scootaloo sitting up right. She was blank, pondering what had just happened.

“I think you may have hit a nerve. I’ve never seen her fly off like that.” Scootaloo’s tone varied, ranging from worry to concern. I smiled at her and nodded. She sighed and went back to sleep, leaving me alone to wonder what in Celestia’s name I had gotten myself into…

“Stupid, I didn’t even get his name. I should go after him. But he’ll see that as a sign of weakness. I can let him have that on me.”

“Rainbow, darling, why are you mumbling to yourself? It’s most uncouth. And it’s certainly not helping me figure out what is wrong with you and why you, of all ponies, ordered a dress from this evening, that is actually in fashion.”

“Don’t worry. Stallion problems. You’d probably blow it out of proportion.”

“You? Stallion problems? I’m surprised. I thought you’d never settle down to have a special some pony. Who is he? Do I know him?”

“He’s not exactly what you’d call stallion material, more of a rival mate. In a friend sense, not a one night stand sense.”

“I can say I’m surprised. Some pony like you needs some pony else with a competitive edge.”

“That’s the problem, he’s not some pony else. He’s a friend of Niall’s.”

“Niall? Surely I know him. But Pinkie and Fluttershy are dating the both of them, aren’t they?”

“That Jamie guy is still hanging with Pinkie, but the one that’s not Niall, I swear, just challenged me to a date.”

“You mean Connor. He’s alright I suppose. Quite nice, although I sensed he was slightly, err, quirky.”

“He seemed funny, but in both senses of the word.”

“I suppose I don’t know him too well. I was shouting at Niall the whole time we were around him. And then I stormed off in a huff after we broke up in front of him so, I suppose you know him better than I do. Although I believe that he was still with Fluttershy up until last night.”

“Scootaloo, are you sure? Rainbow doesn’t seem like the kind of pony to go for a tuxedo.”

“Relax. Sweetie Belle told me that Rarity told her that Rainbow told her that a stallion who can clean up nicely and still compete with her would be the one for her. And I have no idea what could be better at smartening up a pony than cotton shirts and polyester trousers.”

“But are you sure a tuxedo made for a pony is going to fit me?”

“It doesn’t seem all too different from your clothes now. It just might be a little too short on the legs, but Apple Bloom said it was slightly small for Big Macintosh. And you’re not a big as him, are you?”

“No, but I’ve not had the chance to check.”

“Anyway, here’s the trousers and shirt. Check if they fit.”

“Hang on, the trousers and the shirt are fine. Do you have a bow tie or something?”

“Yeah, but why are you going to wear it? It doesn’t-”

“Trust me on this one; it goes well with a jacket. Pass me them.”

“There isn’t a jacket. There’s only a waist coat and cloth cap left.”

“Oh for Celestia’s sake, I’m going to get a double dose of embarrassment.”

“Probably not, actually. You look quite dapper.”

“Do you know what that word even means?”

“Not a clue…”

The Date

“I look like an old man… I feel like an old man.” I was on my way to the agreed rendezvous, Sugar Cube Corner. Why Rainbow had sent a message via Sweetie Belle, I have no idea, but I was also questioning why she’d pick Sugar Cube Corner. She may not have been the fancy pony Rarity was, but I was sure she’d know this wasn’t exactly the best place for her to go as unnoticed as possible in a dress.

“Stop moaning. You look good. Hell, I’d do anything for a date with Rainbow Dash, and look half as good.” I looked to the orange filly and gave her a look of disproval. I smiled when she started to blush at what she had said. “That came out wrong…”

“I’m sure it did. But I don’t think this is a date. I blackmailed Dash into coming and hanging out, and she challenged me to a ‘who can make the other more embarrassed’ competition.” I explain to Scootaloo the situation, as she had dozed through it. She sighed and murmured something about it was Dash we were talking about and that she wasn’t very conventional “when it came to relationships.”

While I sat there waiting for her to arrive, I thought about Scootaloo’s less than enthusiastic mumblings. I suppose Dash’s personality wouldn’t let anything slow her down, let alone another being. Although I had scarcely given it thought, Dash would probably be the type to be in a love-hate relationship, built on one-upping each other. It was quite amusing to think that, considering that our first meeting had instantly involved Dash trying to one up me. It was almost like she’d…

“Hey, why are you blushing?” Scootaloo was staring me up and down, looking to see what had happened. I’d realised I’d accepted. Surely she didn’t think that this was a date. I’d blackmailed her. She’d disliked the idea of going until she brought up the dare. But I couldn’t help my mind wondering about the idea. Dash was pretty cool. I could list several attractive qualities she had, and maybe even more if you expanded on the idea of attractive.

“No” I exclaimed, almost shouting at the filly in front of me, causing her to jump in shock. I took a breath as I came to my senses and realised what had happened. My mind was way too curious; I thought I’d learnt that earlier in life. I had to block the ideas of Dash and me out of my head. We were friends, meeting up at a sweet shop, to chat and mess about. Not in that way! Oh Celestia, this was going to be torture trying to keep the images that were forming from clouding my judgement. I was almost certainly going to be doomed, if not shunned by Rainbow for insinuating she goes out with someone like me. She was way too cool; I was just a slightly nerdy teenager that shares her love of athletic activities and challenges. And besides, I just couldn’t. I had to go home at some point, didn’t I? I couldn’t leave like that without harm some pony that I’d grown close to. It wasn’t for me to decide. I had to do the right thing here, didn’t I? Right?

“Connor? Could I speak with you a moment, darling?” A voice had called me from the back and I had wanted to remain in one place, but Scootaloo’s awkward silence when I looked to her for advice prevented me from staying. I sighed and excused myself. I peered around for the voice. I realised that Sugar Cube Corner was shut for the night and that I was sitting at the only table, in the middle of the place. And I hadn’t seen Pinkie for that matter. I wonder where she was hiding.

As I walked into the only room leading off from the main restaurant, I noticed something I probably would have missed if I hadn’t banged my shin against it. “Owowow…Oh” I whispered to myself. A trail of kitchen utensils, covered in a variety of colourful icings, sprinkles and dough.  I waded through the mess and found myself face to face with a pile of rainbow coloured doughnuts. Every single sprinkle seemed to be place perfectly. My mouth was watering as I looked on. Not only had I not eaten anything but an apple Scootaloo had brought along to the fitting session, I hadn’t had anything sugary and I get paranoid when I get low on energy as well as feeling ill. I didn’t want to go out to Rainbow Dash and whine about it. I could surely have one, no?

I stared at them, salivating. I was convinced an angel and devil would pop up on my shoulders. I wouldn’t have held out much longer if Pinkie hadn’t snored, from behind the counter. It made me jump and finally broke my concentration of the best doughnuts I’d ever seen. As I caught my breath, I peered over the table top to see a fairly cute sight. Opposed to what I would have thought, Pinkie was laying atop of Jamie, using his stomach and chest as a pillow. She seemed to be hugging him and keep rubbing her head against his chest. Jamie was smiling and had a hand on Pinkie’s neck. I let out a small d’aww as I broke into a smile.

“I almost tripped over them when I came here earlier. But alas, I thought it was cute too.” I looked up to the speaker to find Rarity nevertheless. She looked worried. “Er...Hello, Connor. May I ask where you found your attire? I can say I’ve seen anything like it.” She had to hold a hoof to her mouth to stifle a giggle that formed as she looked me up and down.

“Scootaloo, Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle lent it to me. She said it was Big Mac’s. He wears it when going to Manehattan to do business.” I smirked as I recalled the odd conversation with two of the fillies carrying the large pile of clothing and Apple Bloom almost falling over on the stairs. “I take it Sweetie is your sister?” The white unicorn nodded as we both looked away for alternate conversations.

A few moments of an awkward silence passed, where both of us tried to avoid anything to embarrass ourselves and not laugh at the other respectively. “So, have you been busy with Fluttershy lately?” She raised an eyebrow in question, but it dropped slightly when I sighed in regret.

“I… I let her go. I thought I’d be fine with breaking up with her for the greater good of her and Niall going out. But I couldn’t help but feel she friend-zoned me first. I think that’s what’s getting at me. But still, I met Rainbow Dash. We arranged to meet up tonight, even if I had to blackmail her and accept a challenge to get us there.” I smirked as I thought of how I’d messed up, only to get another chance with another famous mare. It seemed very different from my usual luck, or therefore, lack of.

“Good, Good. I’m glad you cleared that up. I thought you’d cheated on Fluttershy for a second. I’d have to do all manner of unpleasant thing if that’s what you’d done.” She laughed a little bit, but I could understand she was just trying to confirm I hadn’t and wouldn’t do any harm to any of her friends. It made me very uncomfortable and I gave a nervous laugh to try and convey that. “Anyhow, I believe you have a da- meet up to attend. Oh, and nice idea getting Dash in a dress. I’ve been trying for ages and she wouldn’t budge. Although you did challenge her pride, which I can’t wholly say I approve of.”

“I couldn’t approve it either. See you around” I replied, looking at the unicorn that had turned to leave. I did my normal gesture of goodbye and made my own exit after a final glance at the sight on the floor. I was almost dumbstruck when I saw that Pinkie was now the cushion and Jamie was laying on her. I wanted to figure out how they’d done it without us noticing but then I realised something. Don’t try to figure out anything that involves Pinkie. I sighed and made my way back to the table.

My eyes widened with the sight. No longer was the little orange filly sitting by the table, legs swinging underneath with boredom. Nay, she had been replaced by the almost unrecognisable mare that looked as good as the doughnuts, if not better. My jaw hung open as I stared. Instead of the Gala dress I had expected, the cyan blue mare had opted for a whole new, and certainly unexpected, look. A long navy dress with white lacing, with a thin white belt around the midsection. It really displayed her athletic physique and natural shape.  But the thing that caught my attention most was her mane. It sat perfectly over her shoulders, possessing a sort of Rarity twang to it, although it wasn’t as styled as her coiffure. It hung down with grace and looked almost like a rainbow coloured waterfall. I had to hand it to her; I didn’t know if I’d fallen for her that very next moment, as she swished it around as she sat down, or if I’d always harboured something. I’d seem to come down with spontaneous amnesia, most likely caused by an accelerated heart rate.

“Whoa.” It was all I could manage. I kept staring as she looked up and noticed me. She blinked a couple of times, eyelashes, accentuated by mascara, fluttering. She smirked and flicked her hair back once again. I think she knew what was going through my head at that moment, because I probably couldn’t have been more obvious. I was currently looking at my own clothing and questioning Scootaloo’s judgement of ‘dapper’, because I certainly didn’t feel it going for me right now.

“I hope you meant current fashion, because I’m not wearing that.” She continued to smirk, knowing I’d be slightly embarrassed by the comment. Anything to get a head start in the dare. I looked to her and blushed, scratching the back of my head. I glanced at my clothing once again. I probably should have gone to the Carousel Boutique for a suit or something. “I guess it was a bit of a rush to get one though considering Rarity spent all evening doing this for me.”

I just continued my disbelief. “Whoa.” She giggled at my oddness. “I-I wasn’t expecting you to go all out with the dare. I thought you’d probably just put your gala or bridesmaid dress on. You look… whoa.” I could say much, shocked by feelings I’d never thought I’d have for Rainbow Dash, let alone a fictional character. I shuffled towards her, focused on nothing but the mare herself. I didn’t break eye contact even as I stumbled into the kitchen utensils again.

As I sat down at the sole table, I finally stopped staring and sighed. When I didn’t look up again, Rainbow knew something was bothering me. “You okay? You seem down.” She lifted my head up with a hoof and looked me in the eye. “Something on your mind?” I beheld the glistening magenta orbs that twinkled in front of me. I wanted to say I was alright then and there. But I couldn’t, I had to tell her something though.

“It’s just, well, I thought you’d turn up in a dress and I’d be myself, making jokes about it and we could laugh about it together. But I think I’m getting a little flustered. It’s not every day you’d find out that the fastest mare in Equestria is also one of the most beautiful.” I smiled as I managed to get something out, but it faded as I realised what had come out. I almost apologised and left, but something she did kept me there and made me think. She blushed.

“Don’t get me acting all sappy. I’m not cut out for that. And anyways, I kind of like your look too. It’s dapper” she said, a hint of embarrassment in her voice, “Or is it Spiffy? I forget which one is which.” I smiled at the complement and refrained from correcting her like I usually would. “Still, do you want to get something to eat? I guess we didn’t come here to exchange cheesy complements.” Continuing to look into her eyes, I nodded and slid her over a menu from the edge of the table. She looked at it and laughed. I peered over mine to look at her. I raised an eyebrow as she explained. “Any sort of Desert. Almost any flavour. It’s not that difficult. I’m going to have a Skittle Cupcake. I haven’t had one in ages.” She smiled as I tried to realise what she had said.

“So Rainbow likes to taste the Rainbow. I never would have guessed.” I gave her a nudge as I browsed my menu to see exactly that. I scowled at it and put the menu back to the side. Rainbow was looking at me, grinning, giving me a look to say ‘told you so.’ “Triple Chocolate Muffin, for me then.” I looked around for a server until I realised she was passed out on the floor of the kitchen. I face-palmed. “Excuse me, I’ll go wake Pinkie. She’s passed out on the floor.”

I got up and turned to walk to the kitchen. I was almost instantly greeted by the pink mare invading my personal space. “Okie dokie lokie. Make sure to wake me up gently. I get cranky when I wake up on the right side of the kitchen. Or is it when I’m on the left side? I forget.” She giggled as she bounced around to Rainbow Dash, leaving me with a confused look. “Hiya Rainbow. Can I getcha anything?”

Rainbow just laughed as I turned around, still wearing the confused expression on my face. “Seriously, Connor, I think you need to get yourself looked at. No ponies face should be able to make such idiotic looks.” I wasn’t sure whether to laugh or be insulted so I just groan. “Skittle Cupcake for me, Pinkie, and I think Connor wanted one as well.” Pinkie smiled and bounced back to the kitchen where I heard a large clatter. I think she hit the utensils. But as a shout of ‘Oops, my bad’ rang through the shop, I realised that it might not have been Pinkie.

Dash chuckled and muttered something about muffins, whilst I turned see if I could see the grey Pegasus. As the exit from the kitchen slammed shut, it was obvious that some pony had left. “Rainbow, what’s with the cupcake? Why you get me Skittles?” I pouted as I tried to get sympathy and an answer. She smirked as the right words crossed her mind.

“I thought you’d like to try them. Better to regret what you did than what you didn’t.” She smiled as she recited one of the things I’d followed for as long as I could remember. “You like that? I made that up a year or so back when I was at the young fliers’ competition. I kind of go nervous, and kept reciting pep talks I’d received. That was the gist of one of them.” She chuckled a little as I sighed. I wondered what to say next but nothing came to me.

“Y’know Rainbow. You’re pretty cool for a mare.” I had no intention for that to come out of my mouth. I face-palmed almost instantly, blushing like mad. Rainbow sniggered. I snuck a look up and saw Rainbow almost laughing her head off. I was slightly confused, but on the other hand, I could understand that she was laughing at the absurdity and randomness of the comment.

“Heh Thanks. You’re not bad either, for an idiot.” The corners of my mouth turned up, and I laughed too. It lasted for a while, until we were out of breathe and had gone red in our faces. Pinkie turned up not a moment too soon. Oddly enough, Pinkie might have been the only thing that could calm us done.

“Have fun you guys. I’ll be out back with Rarity spying on one of our friends. Apparently they’re on a date.”  She winked and comically bounced away leaving Rainbow to sigh. I think she wasn’t the only one to realise that Pinkie knew who they were spying on.

“Rarity can’t get over the idea that we’re out together. She’s been on my back for months to reach out into the world of romance but I’m not one for all that sappy schmoopy-doo nonsense” she moaned, before taking a bite of the cupcake. Her eyes widened and she smiled. I suppose everything, even bakery, could bring a smile to some pony’s face. I decided to try my own one. The multi-coloured treat couldn’t compare with much I’d ever eaten, it was way better. The sweetness of the cupcake was perfect and the idea of the rainbow was spot on.

I was still getting over the idea of ponies being real. Especially being this open to interspecies relationships. It was said amongst my friends and I that Spike didn’t get Rarity because he was a dragon and she was a pony. Although it could be the fact that Rarity would be dating some pony younger than her sister. But I couldn’t dwell on that, I had to do what I could to make this da- meet up as good as possible. I was eating rainbow cupcakes with Rainbow Dash and we were laughing, albeit we were usually laughing at me. It was like something out of a poor fan fiction, like the quality I usually write. But as I thought of Fan Fictions, one came to mind that brought mental images that I’d rather forget and some odd information I had gained around that time that came with it. I almost felt sick as I thought about what it looked like rather than what it was.

“Whoa. You okay? You look sick all of a sudden.” Rainbow Dash, crumbs stuck to her muzzle, asked through a mouthful of chewed rainbow coloured cupcake. She looked at me and then at the cupcake. “You’re not just being stroppy because you wanted chocolate, are you?” I smiled but still looked a bit sick. I moaned a little in response. “I’ll take it it’s not that then. Come on, I don’t want you to make a mess here. Let’s get some air. I’ll pay.”

Rainbow pulled up her dress slightly to reveal a bag of bits strapped to her thigh. It wasn’t very couth and I probably showed that on my face as my heart continued to race and I went red staring at the sight. She looked up with bits in mouth and put them on the table. She peered over to me and sighed. “I’ve got to keep my bits somewhere. I don’t have a hat or a puffy mane to hide it in, I’m not a unicorn so I have to keep it somewhere on me and I don’t have any saddle bags because to me they’re just extra weight.” I just nodded as she lectured me. She groaned as she thought about what I was thinking about, and blushed when she realised. “Oh, you’re thinking about me. Want to come back to my place?” She bit her lip and swayed her hips as she trotted past me, flicking her tail in my face.

My eyes widened as a response, and I stuttered. “I-I-I… can’t. We’re friends, right? It wasn’t a date, right?” I squeaked on the last word, going red. Rainbow sighed, trotting off. I went after her and caught up to her in barely ten seconds. “You knew that, right?” She nodded, although reluctantly, and gestured to a cloud. I looked up to see her house drifting over town. “That’s your house? That’s bigger than I’d thought it would be, considering the size of your friends houses…”

“Yeah, but to be totally honest, I got it cheap because it’s the house for the weather co-ordinator for Ponyville. I bought it off my company in storm season, because they said it wouldn’t survive. No one minded when I only let the storm last an hour opposed to the full afternoon length. Every pony seemed happy to not have the afternoon ruined.” Rainbow Dash, still trotting alongside me, looking like she wanted to be in the air, explained several other things like why the others didn’t have big houses and other financial problems they’d faced that she hadn’t. The luck she’d had seemed uncanny, but I had other things to worry about. “You know you never actually told me that humiliating secret.”

The comment caught me off guard, so I just stopped and choked. Rainbow looked back at me with a devilish smile. She winked and I knew I was metaphorically cornered. “I just- didn’t get round to it. I’ll…um…tell you when we get to your place. Pinkie Promise,” I asked hopefully. I didn’t want to tell her now. If she could forget about it, I think I’d be better off. Even if she didn’t seem like the type to forget something if it wasn’t convenient, I could hope.

”Fine by me, I just got to get the ladder down now so you can climb up.” She flew up to the cloud house and dropped a ladder on me. We’d reached her house in probably ten seconds flat, an uncanny coincidence when I thought it to be a minute or so away. I had to dismiss it as I climbed, trying to think of my darkest secret. Although I wasn’t the sort to tell my secrets, I didn’t have many to hide. My main one was usually being a brony and ex-furry because of the increase of haters in my school (five in my year group, probably around thirty in the school). But I was quite open with these because I never got asked and I wanted to express myself as an individual occasionally.

My darkest secret I think was something I’d realised just since coming here, to Ponyville and meeting some of the ponies. I climbed the final rung and clambered onto the porch, unable to sink through the unnameable solid beneath me. I stood, thinking as Rainbow opened the door and sped inside. “Don’t come in yet, I’ll just find the enchanted necklace thing that Twilight gave me so Applejack could visit… pony feathers, I think she’s still got it.” I sighed at the prospect of not actually getting inside Rainbow’s house. I sat waiting on the porch as it slowly sank into the cloud. Inch by inch, it got deeper and deeper. I was unaware of it as I was lost in thought, believing that it was a lame secret that Rainbow would probably scoff at.

I heard a creak and Rainbow came dashing through the door, only to see me disappear through the cloud. “OH SH-PONYFEATHERS!” I censored myself unnecessarily as I fell through the air, spreading m limbs to cause as much resistance to the drop as possible. It didn’t help that I was wearing jeans and a t-shirt, and nothing that I could spread like a parachute. I span in mid-air to face the ground. It was a mistake as I realised it approached fast. I span again to see Mach speeds increasing as Rainbow attempted to catch me. I hit cloud after cloud, serving no benefit to stop my fall. I laughed a little. I was going to die because I was too heavy. I was only nine stone, and almost underweight at that.  I smiled at Rainbow as she edged closer and closer. The sound barrier was becoming sharper and sharper as I neared the ground. I could swear I wasn’t that high up to start with. I was only 100m off the ground. I should have been hitting hard half a minute ago.

I took a last glance at Rainbow pulling up as I hit something. A large splash formed as I hit water. I sank like a rock to the bottom in less than 5 seconds and lay motionless as something latched onto me. I tried to cough but spluttered water as I drowned. I was dragged somewhere towards the edge while I blacked out. Happy I’d found seen life in Equestria and would find mine end here.

You can admit it Connor. You think you can hide it. You’ve lost it before, you’ve been disappointed by it, you’ve let it corrupt your actions and you’ve even see it walk away without you, never to see it again. It’s your secret and now no one will know, because you took it to your grave. Now head towards that light over there.

…

Not that one, over there. Not upwards. Not upwards. Come back. It’s your time.

Author’s Note

Well, I think this might be the best chapter but I really bucking hated writing it. I can’t do long stories without making it segmented. I hope you enjoyed this ‘cause I didn’t. But I don’t like leaving things too open ended so I’ve got a little around 400 word chapter coming up to finish this off. If I ever come back to it, I’ll publish a new restart opposed to the 400 words.

Arrivederci,

ConnVolpe

Hiatus Ending

I coughed. I’d never felt such pain before. My insides were flooded and I was vomiting water with each wrenching action. “You saved me… why did you save me?” I suddenly became sad. I’d probably just drowned trying to save that person. Lord knows it’s happened before to others. I looked to my saviour to see something I didn’t expect. Proof that I wasn’t dreaming that wonderful dream.

“What’s with the suicidal tendencies? You just fell of my porch. I had to save you.” That voice was one I’d heard before and one I wanted to hear again. Rainbow Dash. “So tell me, what was that secret? Is it that bad that you wanted to kill yourself?”

“It’s…not something I should be ashamed of. I think I fall in love too quick” I murmured, trying not to make it too obvious.

“I beg your pardon? You said something about love?” I suppose Rainbow hadn’t been friends with Fluttershy since flight school without being able to hear her mumbling.

I nodded and repeated myself. “I think I fall in love to quick. But don’t get me wrong, I don’t fall in love for no reason. Take tonight for example, I admired how much courage it took for you to dress like you did,” I noticed her dress was soaked after saving me, “and how good you looked in it.” She blushed a little. “I also liked how we could mess around with each other, especially with that dare, without hurting the other. I’m always falling for the tomboys, I guess.”

Rainbow sat down, staring me in the eye and blushing. “I kind of like you too but I thought this wasn’t a date…” She smirked a little; think about how I’d told her that. I smiled too, laughing at the awkward situation that was developing.

“I guess you could say that I was trying to convince myself of that more than I was trying to convince you. Even Scootaloo said it was a date.” I blushed more than I’d done ever before, seeing the little spark of hope in Rainbow’s eyes. “I guess we could do better than today.”

What came next was unexpected. I was pulled into a hug, and I went with it. I looked down to Rainbow Dash, a tear sitting on my cheek. “Today was fine. But tomorrow’s going to be at least twenty per cent cooler…”

Author's stupid song that adds nothing to the story

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