Twilight Gets Hit by a Car

by Edmar Fecler

Rating: teen
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Human, Other, Comedy
Length: 13232

this is the sory of how accidentally running over Twilight inevitably led to me being committed.

Good morning, afternoon, night, or whenever you're reading this. My name is Edward, aka 'patient 42', and I am currently residing in an insane asylum.
Why?
I suppose it all started When the ruler of this place called Equestria tasked her personal student, Twilight Sparkle, to travel to Earth and study the human race.
Unfortunately for Twilight, when she teleported to our world she, well... she appeared in the middle of the road. Right in front of my car. Needless to say, this put a pretty big dent in her expedition. ...as well as my car's bumper.

Sounds crazy, right? But hey, maybe thats the reason why I'm in this cell.
Point is, The story I'm about to tell you is the tale of events sparked by that ill-fated night.

note: In this plane of existence, the franchise "My Little Pony" does not exist. In short; this is not, nor will it ever be, a 'brony meets pony' story.
Also, on a more recent note, I had this idea and began writing way back in S2, so this is in no way inspired by EqG. (also, its non-alicorn twilight)

Published 2013-10-26 15:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2014-02-08 18:16:52 UTC

Chapter 1

I’m sitting in a metal chair in the middle of a stark white room totally devoid of any other objects, silently watching the door before me. It was built to look like part of the wall, so it’s considerably hard to identify unless you already know where it is. No handles, no windows. There was only a small slot at the floor that opened up long enough to slide a plate of food into my cell when it’s meal time.

Earlier, they had told me that a doctor would be coming to talk with me. They, of course, being the bodiless voices that spoke to me through the intercom built into my cell. ...I have yet to find the speakers.

The door opened, and in stepped the doctor. He pushed another metal chair in front of him, which he stopped a few feet in front of me. After arranging it to his liking, he sat down and looked me in the eye. “Good morning, patient 42.”

“Good morning doctor,” I began, “And please, don’t call me a number. It’s degrading.”

“Alright, what would you prefer?”

“My name. My real name. Edward. Oh, and please do NOT call me Ed. I loathe that nickname.”

“Alright, Edward, how are you feeling today?”

“Bored, as always. Not exactly like I have much to do,” I continued, motioning to my empty surroundings.

“Mmm… So do you know why you are here?”

“Because you all don’t believe I am what I say I am, despite my appearance. You all think I’m delusional. That’s why you locked me up in the loony-bin, correct?”

“…More or less. But you see, what you were claiming before is impossible-”

“Then why are you here to ‘interview’ me, or whatever you want to call it?”

“I’m here to help.”

“HA! HAHAHAhahahahaaaaaaa… …Right, help me. That’s what the doctors always say. What you mean is that you are here to try and convince me that what I know is wrong, according to you. That, what I was claiming before is impossible.”

The doctor sat silently for a moment before continuing. “Well, I wouldn’t really say that-”

“Of course you wouldn’t.”

“-But for now, I am here to hear your story. To listen to what you have to say.”

I thought to myself silently for a second. “…Alright. Where would you like me to begin?”

“At the beginning,” the doctor continued as he pulled out a pen and notepad.

“Alright.” I clapped my hands together. “In the beginning, God created all of existence-”

“Patient- err… Edward, not that beginning. Perhaps one more relevant to you specifically?”

“Oh, that beginning,” I said with a sly grin. “You see, when a mommy and a daddy love each other very much…” The doctor’s expression was dead. “…You’re not any fun, you know that?”

“I’m not here to have fun.”

I sighed. “Fine, I’ll cut to the chase. It all started on the drive home one day…”

“I been in the right place, but it must have been the wrong time,” I sang with my car radio. It was about eight at night as I recall. It had been just another good day for me so far. Worked my shift as a bank teller, got my monthly paycheck, went to Burger King to buy some scrumptious Whoppers, and began the drive home.

“I had said the right thing, but I must have used the wrong line.” I turned onto the one-lane road that drove through my neighborhood and reduced my speed appropriately, keeping a close eye on the road to avoid hitting any animal that might be attempting a crossing.

“I been on the right trip, but I must have used the wrong car-” Suddenly a blinding light flashed in the middle of the road, causing me to shield my eyes and slam on the breaks. I heard the thud of something hitting my bumper overtop the screeching of my tires.

The car stopped a second later, giving me the chance to put the gear shifter into park and turn the radio off. It took a moment to rub the spots out of my eyes before I was able to open them. “Damnit,” I groaned, pain stabbing at my eye sockets, “What the heck was that?”

I looked around outside the front of my car before glancing up at my rearview mirror. In it, I noticed something outlined by my taillights in the road behind me. “What the…” As I looked harder, it began to look like an animal about the size of a dog.

“…Aw crap…”

I unbuckled my seatbelt and jumped out of the car as fast as I could. Once outside of my car, I looked back at the figure outlined and saw that it was clearly some kind of animal. I stared at it silently as dozens of bad scenarios flashed through my mind. It took me a moment to snap out of it and run back down the road towards it.

I couldn’t just hit some poor animal and leave it for dead. And even if it was already dead, I still couldn’t just leave it in the middle of the road for the next guy to come along and mangle it any further. A shiver ran down my mind at the sentiment.

I stopped within a few feet of the animal. The first thing I noticed was that it was obviously equine. Hooves, mane, tail, covered in fur, the whole bit. However it’s surprisingly small size meant it was some kind of pony. As I stepped closer I noticed some kind of brand on its flank, though it was hard to make out in the poor lighting of my taillights.

I ran my hands through my hair nervously as I glanced to the pastures on either side of the road. If this pony was branded, then surely it must belong to somebody. I could get in a lot of trouble for hitting somebody’s animal.

I could see the pony’s chest rising and falling as I knelt down beside it. It was a relief to see that I had not killed it, though whether it would live was yet to be seen. I knew for sure that I had hit it, so I had to find the injury and determine how severe it was. I looked over what I could without touching it starting at its back legs, which bore no apparent injuries. Upon a closer look at the brand, I thought I could make out a formation of stars.

As I conducted my search for injuries further, the only sign of a wound I found was a patch of matted hair in its mane, right next to its horn. Wait, what?!

It took me a second to comprehend the possibility that this was a real unicorn. Taking a closer look at the swirled horn, I could see that it merged seamlessly with the skin amongst the naturally parted mane. I fell back and stared at the unicorn in shock.

Of course. The first living, breathing unicorn anyone has ever seen, and I run over it with my car.

Freakin’ typical.

But wait… It was branded. Did someone own it? Was it a part of some kind of secret unicorn farm for the government?! Had unicorns actually existed all this time, and I was just kept in the dark?!? Why was I asking so many pointless questions when there was a unicorn lying in front of me with a head wound from where I hit it with my car?!?!

I scrambled back up on my knees and bent over to examine the wound closer. I touched the matted section of the mane delicately, and found it to be sopping wet. Even though my hand was already red from the taillight’s glow, I didn’t need a color to tell me what that liquid was. Knowing I had to act fast, I started making a plan.

I couldn’t help it here. I had no medical supplies. And even if I did; the middle of a road at night, an operation room does not make. I had to get it home, where it was clean. Well… clean-er. In any case, I had some medical supplies there that would go a long way in helping me with the wound.

I remembered I had some towels in my car that I kept for emergencies. I could wrap one around its head until I got home. It wasn’t the best idea, but it would have to do. After a quick trip to my car and back, I wrapped a white towel around the wound as gently as I could. I could worry about the stains later.

With the wound wrapped for the time being, I carefully reached my arms underneath its midsection and lifted it up as I stood. The first thing I noticed was how incredibly soft and plush-like it felt. If the situation were different, I might have given it a big ol’ hug.

Back at the car, I lay the unicorn on another towel I had spread across the seat. I made sure that it was all inside before I closed the car door. The last thing it needed was a door slammed on one of its legs. With the pony secure in the back seat, I got back in the driver’s seat. I didn’t bother with the seatbelt since I was only a few minutes from home.

With a click of the gear shifter, I put the car in drive and started forward cautiously. I knew I had to keep the unicorn as still as possible, lest I risk making the wound worse. It took no time at all to pass the three houses on the left and another cow pasture to the right. After that, the road narrowed and led to a mansion-sized house on the crest of a hill. If only I could live there…

Instead of driving the rest of the road-slash-driveway, I turned left onto a gravel road that weaved through a section of the woods. The aptly named ‘Green Tunnel,’ as I had come to know it. Not only was the road winding, but the rout was rather bumpy as well. I slowed down further and made my way through the woods, occasionally looking back to make sure the unicorn was remaining still.

It took only two or three minutes to make it through the green tunnel, but the next part was what concerned me the most. The road beside the last house and its front yard looked like a pair of meteors had rained down and left craters.

Slowing to a snail’s pace, I slowly let the front wheels dip into the first oversized pothole. The back wheels slipped in just as the front ones made it to the top of the other side. I repeated the process on the second crater. But since it was deeper than the first, the underside of my car scraped the lips a bit. I should really dig the edges out some time to avoid that…

Once past the craters, I could see my house across the empty field behind it. The ground sloped down in front of it and stretched out until it hit the lake. It makes for a simply gorgeous view in the morning when the sun comes up past the hills far beyond the lake. In fact, the view almost made up for the house being an L-shaped, single-story, three room lake cabin. …almost.

The gravel driveway kept to the edge of the field and stopped beside my house, as did I. Once the car came to a stop, I put it in park and turned the engine off. I got out and opened the back door, finding the unicorn exactly where I had put it. I wrapped the towel it was lying on around it and picked it up again. It was a bit difficult walking across the roots that stuck out of the path, courtesy of the small tree that had grown in the few feet between the road and my house, but I managed.

After a moment of struggling with the doorknob (it’s rather hard to turn with a pony in your arms) I managed to get the door open. Now where was I going to put this thing while I doctored its wound? Both the guest bedroom and my bedroom were out of the question, lest it start acting up and trashing the place. The back porch was a possibility, but the pony had a better chance at breaking out and running off out there.

…Which left me with the bathroom. Now that I thought about it, the bathtub would be the easiest place to clean if I doctored it there. I hadn’t been able to take a bath in it for years anyway; not since I got to be too tall to fit.

With my destination set, I turned and went straight to the bathroom. Thankfully the door was cracked, so I nudged it open with my knee and stepped inside. I gently lay the towel-wrapped unicorn into the tub and went to the medicine cabinet. I grabbed a roll of bandages, a bottle of peroxide, a few Q-tips, and a cotton pad before closing the cabinet. I placed another towel across the toilet seat before spreading the medical supplies across it. With the rudimentary operation scene set up, I got on my knees and leaned over the edge of the bathtub.

As I was unwrapping the unicorn I noticed yet another fact about it. It was purple! I had not noticed before due to a combination of poor lighting and a bit of panic, but there it was. A purple unicorn pony. It wasn’t one-eyed and I had no idea if it flew, so I didn’t have to worry about if it was a people eater.

But seriously; now wasn’t a good time for jokes.

I shook myself from the funny thought and set to work dipping a Q-tip in peroxide. After all, the first step in treating an injury is to make sure the wound is clean. I carefully parted the unicorn’s hair, revealing the bloody wound. Upon seeing the wound for the first time, I removed my hand from its hair and balanced the Q-tip down on the peroxide bottle’s lid. There was too much blood caked around the wound to clearly see how bad it was.

I reached behind myself and grabbed a plastic cup I kept by the sink. After moving it below the tub’s faucet I turned the warm water on and filled it up. Once the cup was full I turned the water off and spread the unicorn’s hair again. I paused for a moment, realizing that unless I had knocked this thing into a coma (which I sincerely hoped I hadn’t), then it would probably wake up at the application of water to its open wound. But in either case it had to be done, so I braced for whatever might happen and poured the water.

The instant that the warm water made contact, the unicorn’s (unnaturally) large eyes shot open and began darting around. Then its eyes met mine. I pulled my hand away and barely avoided dropping the entire cup on its head when it pulled away from me and pushed itself against the side of the tub to try and get away. Now, I sometimes get a worried look from adults, or even fearful glances from children at my job, but I suppose those looks are only natural for a six-foot ten giant such as me. Even so, never before had I seen any animal or human as utterly afraid as that unicorn when it woke up.

I slowly set the cup on the toweled toilet seat with the other supplies and raised my hands in a defensive manner. “Eeaasy now, eeeaasy,” I began in a cautious manner, as if I would to a human in the situation. The unicorn’s eyes widened even further and its pupils shrank to about the size of ping-pong balls.

“Just take it easy, alright? I need to treat your wounds.” I picked the cup of warm water back up, watching as the unicorn’s eyes darted between it and my face. The expressions in this thing’s body language were so vivid, I could almost read its emotions like a book. And Right now it was on the ‘unbridled fear’ chapter.

“Easy…” I cautiously moved the cup closer, staying alert in case this thing tried to bite me. “Have to clean the wound…” Its pupils dilated slightly and its slack jaw began to close, so I gently parted its hair for a third time before pouring more water over the wound.

It hissed slightly in pain and jerked its head back. “Hey,” I said with a touch of seriousness in my tone. “I said take it easy. If you go jerkin’ your head around while I’m doing this it might make the wound worse.” No doubt this thing didn’t even know what I was saying, but I still had to try, I guess.

Its mouth finally closed the rest of the way and its eyes returned to their normal (?) size. While the panic was still there, I could also make out a hint of sadness in its eyes, as if to say it was sorry. It moved its head back to my hands. “Alright, that’s better.”

I poured the rest of the water across the wound, revealing it to be nothing more than a large whelp with a medium sized cut across it. Hopefully it was nothing too serious in terms of this thing’s biology. After setting the empty cup down, I picked the Q-tip back up and brought it to the cut.

The unicorn winced in pain at initial contact, as would anyone, so I pulled it back briefly before dabbing the cut again. All the while I was cleaning the wound, the unicorn held its eyes shut and scrunched its mouth. Once done with cleaning the wound, I tossed the Q-tip into the trash bin beneath the sink. The most difficult part was behind us now.

The unicorn watched as I spread a touch of green-salve across one of the gauze pads I had gotten. My mother had convinced me when I was little that green-salve was something of a miracle solvent that healed wounds faster, so I had always used it for band-aids and other such bandages.

Once I had a decent amount of green-salve on the gauze pad, I, once again, parted the unicorn’s hair gently to grant me access to the wound. The unicorn scrunched its face in preparation for pain, but none came. It opened one eye cautiously, and then the other before looking up to the pad I was holding on the wound. Knowing the feeling of green-salve, there was probably a cool, numbing sensation spreading across the wound.

Unfortunately for me, unrolling the gauze-wrap was proving to be rather difficult with my left hand occupied in holding the pad on the wound. As I was fumbling with the wrap, I suddenly felt something unfamiliar on my other hand. I nearly jumped as I spun around to find that the unicorn had moved one of its hooves up to my hand.

My eye twitched slightly. Wasn’t it kind of, I don’t know, impossible for an animal’s limbs to move that way? And besides, what could it be doing that for? Surely it wasn’t intelligent enough to understand what I was doing to try to help it. …right?

A few seconds of awkward silence passed. “You, uh…” I blinked. “Y-you got it?” The unicorn nodded slowly, making sure not to shift the pad. “Uh… o-ok then, I guess…” Its hoof took my hand’s place as I pulled it away. Damn, this was getting really, really weird.

Now with both hands at my disposal, I was able to unroll a good stretch of gauss-wrap and cut it from the roll. The unicorn removed its hoof as I applied the bandage to it and began wrapping it around its head. With a small stretch of tape to make sure the gauss would not unwrap, the job was about as done as I could get it with the supplies I had.

I looked at my watch. Ten-a-clock already? Sheesh, I guess time flies when you’re medically treating a fairy tale creature. I stood up and put the medical supplies back in their respective places before tossing the toilet seat towel up on top on the shelf of towels. I would wash it and the others later.

I turned back to the unicorn as it continued staring at me with its massive eyes. “You, uh… You can sleep in here I guess. I think the wound will have a better chance of healing if you don’t get too active.” It looked over the edge of the tub at the plastic, white tiled floor, and then it looked back up to me with a very un-amused expression plastered on its face. At least it wasn’t scared out of its skin anymore.

“Sorry,” I concluded with a shrug. After all, it would be a lot simpler to clean up if/when this thing decided to do its ‘business’. That’s what bathrooms were for, after all.

I closed the door behind me and walked left to my bedroom. It was only now that I realized just how tired I seemed to be, causing my legs to buckle slightly. I opened the bedroom door and closed it behind me before falling face-first into the soft stack of mattresses and covers. “Man, what a day,” I managed to mumble through the covers before falling into a deep sleep, filled with bizarre dreams of magical ponies, star wars, and exploding turtles.

Author's Note

Note: yes, this chapter was written almost a year ago. The reason its available now is because I didnt want to make it public until I was ready to work on it, Which i am, which is why I submitted it.

Basically; its looks old, but I will be working on it, so dont fret.

Hope ya'll enjoyed.
~Fecler

Chapter 2

The natural alarm clock inside my brain began going off and I rolled over to stare up at the wooden ceiling. I laid there a moment to let my mind try to wake up some more. I slung my legs off the side of the bed and sat up, causing blood to rush to my brain. I sat there a moment to let the dizziness subside before standing up.

I don’t know why, but I felt unusually groggy that morning. My eyes and ears were barely registering anything that was going on. I also had something nagging in the back of my head about last night, but I was still too dreary to concentrate on it. Fortunately, I knew exactly how to clear my head in a situation like this. All I needed was a big, warm cup o’ Jimmie.

…What’s that? What is a “cup o’ Jimmie,” you ask? Well to put it simply, it’s a mug of hot chocolate. The way I see it, if coffee can be called “a cup a’ Joe,” then why not call hot chocolate “a cup a’ Jimmie?” But I digress…

I stood up suddenly, causing me to stumble and almost fall. After I regained my balance, I opened my bedroom door. From where I stood, the kitchen to my right and the hallway before me formed an L-shape around the bathroom, and at the end of the hall was the door to the guest bedroom. I turned left, looking into the living room that shared an inner wall with my bedroom.

I continued into the kitchen as the morning sun shone through the window, lighting the hallway and countertops. Walking up to the window, I gazed across the broad section of my yard that it overlooked. The dew-soaked grass glistened in the morning’s warm rays, and the reed-filled marsh blew lazily in the cool morning breeze. Beyond the marsh, the lake sparkled and shimmered as the rising sun reflected off its light blue surface. I took a deep breath as I overlooked the gorgeous view before me.

“…Wonder why this curtain’s open,” I muttered to myself before closing the thick curtain, casting the inside of my home into relative darkness. As I turned around, I saw that the terrarium was empty; the loose lid was pushed aside, leaving a narrow gap open to the world, and the rock that had been resting on the lid was now lying on the floor.

“…Not again,” I grumbled as I rubbed my forehead and sighed begrudgingly. This had to be the fifth time he had gotten out in the last three months. If I didn’t know better, I’d say he was trying to escape. “Guess I’ll keep an eye out for him,” I muttered to myself.

Seeing as my grogginess wasn’t going to get any better, I figured it was about time for that cup o’ Jimmie. I put a kettle in the sink and began to run the hot water as I flicked on the lights for the kitchen and adjacent hall. Returning to the sink, I waited for the kettle to finish filling with water before turning the sink off and removing it. I placed the kettle on the stove and turned to high. Now all I had to do was wait.

A few minutes passed as I leaned against the sink and stared at the kettle, waiting for it to begin whistling. ‘A watched pot never boils,’ I recalled my mom telling me, so I figured I might as well get ready with the rest of the ingredients while I waited.

I turned around and opened the right-most shelves above the sink and browsed its various contents before grabbing the box of hot chocolate mix and setting it on the counter. I stepped over to the left-most cabinet and grabbed a mug from the second shelf. It had a drawing of an orange and black cat that had his paw in a goldfish bowl painted on its side. “Call it an ethnic weakness,” read the cat’s thought bubble.

I set it beside the box of hot chocolate mix after looking at the cartoon for a moment. Pulling out a drawer to the right of the sink, I grabbed a large spoon and set it inside the mug. With the last of the hot chocolate essentials added, I leaned back against the sink and crossed my arms.

I don’t know what it was, but I couldn’t help but feel like I was forgetting something. Something to do with last night…

My cloudy thoughts were interrupted by the kettle beginning to whistle in that loud, high-pitched way it does. Not finding the whistling pleasant to my ears, I set the kettle on a hot-pad and turned the stove off.

“Oooh, what’re you making?” A feminine voice asked me from the hallway.

“Hot chocolate,” I instinctively responded, though I hadn’t fully registered that anything had been said.

“Oh, that sounds nice. May I have some?”

“Mehh, sure.” I turned back to the cabinet and grabbed another mug, this one without any decoration. I half-filled both mugs with hot water before stirring 2 packs of hot chocolate mix into the plain mug.

“…One or two,” I asked, still barely aware I was even talking.

“Just one, thank you.”

“Mmm,” I murmured in response. I poured a single pack of mix in the cartoon mug and turned around to the sink, where I filled the plain mug the rest of the way with cool water to avoid scalding my tongue. True, the cartoon one was my favorite, but something inside me decided to do the polite thing and let the stranger use the better mug.

“Ah-” the voice cut in as I lowered the cartoon mug to the sink, “I’d like it hot, if you don’t mind.”

I shrugged and filled it the rest of the way with the hot water. I set the cartoon mug on the counter before leaning against the sink. I heard what sounded like clopping as the voice walked up to the counter beside me. “Thanks,” it said politely. My cloudy mind continued to pay the voice no heed as it grasped the mug and took a slurpy sip of hot chocolate.

As it drank its chocolaty morning beverage, I cradled the plain mug, letting my hands absorb its soothing warmth. I brought it up to my nose, taking in a deep breath of its sweet aroma before I lowered it back to my lips and took a long, savory swig of the chocolaty goodness.

“Now that’s a damn good cup o’ Jimmie,” I said, looking down at the now half-full mug with a wide grin. I could already feel my brain getting alert as the sugar rush began to kick in.

“While I wouldn’t use swearing to describe it, I would have to agree with you there. This is some good hot chocolate.” The voice said pleasantly beside me. A second of silence passed before it began to chuckle lightly. “Clever joke,” it said as it looked at the mug’s cartoon.

Of course, now that my brain was beginning to get into gear, I suddenly realized, ‘Oh hey! There’s something standing beside me drinking hot chocolate as it makes polite conversation! Maybe I should address that!’ My happy expression slowly faded as my brain put the pieces together. Unsure of what else to do, I looked down to my right to see the voice’s source.

Now, I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t at least a little surprised, but I think I took it pretty well.

My eyes widened as I saw the purple unicorn standing beside me. Its head, which reached my waist, turned and looked up from the mug that it was somehow holding in its right hoof. Noticing I was looking at it, a big smile spread across its face to the point where it had to close its eyes.

“Thanks for the hot chocolate,” it said in the feminine voice I had heard before. “To be honest, I was afraid you weren’t going to take it as well as you are, what with seeing a ‘creature’ that’s alien to your world.”

“…It- It talks…” My eye twitched as I lost feelings in my limbs. Subsequently, I totally forgot that I was holding a mug of hot chocolate, which slid out of my grasp. Shards of glass and hot chocolate splattered across the floor around my feet at it shattered. “W-why does it talk?”

The unicorn’s gaze darted down to the mess of mug and hot chocolate, then back up to my face. “Why did you do that?!” It asked in a mix of surprise and shock.

Ignoring its question entirely, I continued to stare at it, a dumbstruck expression plastered on my face. Eying me back with a concerned expression, the unicorn set her mug on the cabinet and took a step away from me. “Are you okay? …Hello?” It asked.

I blinked a couple of times as its words brought me back to reality, assuming this was, in fact, reality. “…What the-?” As my mind snapped out of its daze, the realization that there was broken glass and hot chocolate causing significant pain to my bare feet hit me like a train. My gaze shifted down from the unicorn to the mess at my feet.

“…AAAAAAAAAAAAA-”

The unicorn jumped from my outburst. “Gah!”

“-AAHHHHHHHH! My feet! What- what’s going on?!“ I began stammering as I looked between the unicorn and my feet, which were beginning to bleed slightly. “Why are my feet covered with broken glass?! Why am I talking to a unicorn?! ….WHY IS IT TALKING BACK?!”

The unicorn in question raised its hooves defensively. “Hey now, take it easy… I can explain.”

“Bu-!“

“No! Now would you please stop screaming and listen? I know it’s difficult to take in, but I’m a unicorn. My name is Twilight.”

My shocked expression faded as I looked up to her. “…Twilight?”

“That’s my name, yes,” She said slowly.

My gaping mouth curled into a smile as I repeated its name in my head. “Pfft-HAAAHAHAHA!”

Twilight recoiled a bit. “…What? What’s so funny?” An answer to her question didn’t come as I continued to laugh uncontrollably.

“Oh, oh that’s bad!” I managed through the laughter, “What, do you sparkle too?!”

“Actually, that’s my last name.”

I stopped laughing abruptly and looked at the bewildered expression on her face. “…Oh wait, you’re serious. Let me laugh even harder! BWAAAAHAHAHAHAAAAAA-!”

Twilight’s expression deadpanned as she continued looking at me. I paid the look on her face no heed as I continued laughing loudly. “I-it’s just... such HORRIBLE movies! HeheheHEHEHAHAHA-!”

After a minute or two of side-splitting laughter and hyperventilation, my laughter finally began to die down.

“Are you done yet?” Twilight asked dryly.

“Hehe ehhhh… yea, I think so.”

“You mind explaining all that?”

“Later. I actually feel a lot better now that all that adrenaline is out of my system.” I stood up from where I had been hunched over in laughter. “In fact, I’d like some answers from you as well. …Just as soon as I’m done getting the glass out of my feet and cleaning up in here.”

Twilight’s expression lightened a bit. “Oh, of course. An explanation on my part is probably due, after all.”

“Right. So, um, I guess you can go on in the living room and have a seat. Just don’t touch anything, if you would please.”

Twilight nodded, grabbed her mug of hot chocolate, and turned to the living room.

“Wait-“ I said, stopping her. “You don’t, like, shed or anything, do you?”

Twilight turned back at me, a deadpan expression back on her face.

“…No, then. Okay. I’ll, uh, be there in a bit, I guess,” I replied to her cold stare.

She continued into the living room as I looked down and began stepping carefully around the mess of glass, blood, and hot chocolate. As I did, something inside my head told me that it was going to be a long day.

Author's Note

Yay, next chaper! I know its a bit short, but short and sweet means more frequent chapters. :raritywink:

Chapter 3

Thankfully it hadn’t taken me long to clean the mess I had made in the kitchen, and I walked in to find the pony sipping away at her hot chocolate as she sat in my large armchair, which rested in the center of the living room. I sat down in the rolling chair in front of my computer desk and drawing table, which was located in the corner of the room that shared a wall with my bedroom. Trying to be as casual as possible so as to not warrant any concern from my ‘guest,’ I leaned back slowly and meshed my fingers together beneath my chin.

“…I’d just like to start off by apologizing about my earlier actions. It was the bad combination of a sugar rush and realizing I was standing next to a purple talking fairy tale creature, and I over reacted.”

Twilight rolled her eyes casually. “Its fine, I guess. To be honest, I was expecting far worse.”

“So…” I began, keeping my eyes on the purple unicorn sitting in my comfy arm chair. Twilight swallowed what cocoa she had in her mouth and lowered the mug to her lap as her gaze met mine. “…Who should go first?”

“I’ll start, if you don’t mind.”

I shrugged. “By all means, ask away.”

“I’d like to know where I am, and how exactly I came to be here. The last thing I remember before waking up in your bathtub is a blinding white light.”

I swallowed nervously at the last part. Yes, it was an accident, but I still had no idea about this thing’s intentions. For all I knew, this ‘happy-cheerful’ stuff could be nothing but a ruse, masking some kind of dark intent of vengeance. I would have to approach the subject very carefully.

“Well,” I began, “To answer where you are, you’re in a three room lake cabin that’s Isolated and relatively secluded from the world. The city is mostly across the lake, on the island-like inlet and the surrounding areas past it, but I don’t really think that’s important at the moment. As for how you got here…” Oh man, here’s the hard part. “Well, I found you in the road on the way here, and I couldn’t just let a hurt animal lay in the middle of the street with a head injury. You would’ve died.” Yes, good. That’s the truth. It’s not the whole truth, but it’ll do for now.

“So… you just found me lying in the road?” She reached her open hoof up to the bandages around her head. Her eyes seemed to look off into the distance, as if something was troubling her.

“Yea,” I said, cutting into her train of thought. I could only hope it didn’t involve my hitting her. “Lyin’ there with that nasty bump. How’s it doin’, by the way?”

Twilight’s eyes focused back on me. “Oh, it’s doing fine.” She said in a softer tone of voice. “Thanks again for helping me like that.”

I shrugged casually. “No problem. Though to be honest, considering the circumstances, I think you’re lucky someone else didn’t run into you.” …Damn, did I really just say that?! “Chances are most other people would’ve freaked out and called the cops, or something like that.”

"Cops?”

“Local law enforcment. You know, the guys who catch criminals and stuff.” Twilight nodded, taking in every word I said. “But yea, I figured calling them wouldn’t be a smart thing to do, considering. I mean, I have no idea what you are or where you come from. The last thing I’d want is something bad happening and getting either of us in trouble… Speaking of which, I think it’s time for some of my questions.”

“Go right ahead,” Twilight responded. “I mean, Celestia knows, you must be pretty curious about me.”

I stared at her blankly for a second, puzzled over what this 'celestia' might be. “Riiiight… So, um, what exactly are you? And, if you don’t mind, how and why are you here?”

“Mmm…” she initially responded. I could tell by the way she scrunched her lips that she was conflicted about saying something. “Well, I’m a pony, a unicorn to be more specific, from the land of Equestria.”

“Appropriate name for a place filled with unicorns,” I said with a touch of harmless sarcasm.

“Well not just unicorns, but pegasi and earth ponies as well. Our three species live in harmony, and our lands thrive,” she continued, sounding like she was at the brink of a cocoa-driven lecture.

“Sounds sweet, I guess,” I replied, not really sure how to picture such a place. “Ok, so why are you here? Did something go horribly wrong and you made a hasty escape?”

“Huh?”

“Or were you sent here to destroy mankind?”

“W-what?! No, I-“

“Or are you here to study us, learn about our customs and characteristics so that you may get a better understanding of our species?”

Twilight looked at me with a dumfounded look on her face. “Actually… you pretty much nailed it with the latter,but, how did you-“

“Collaborated knowledge from movies, video games, and the internet.” I said proudly, crossing my arms. “And to think, most people think they make you more dumber.” I grinned slyly at my intentionally incorrect wording.

“…Right. Well, as you guessed, I was tasked by my leaders to come here and study mankind incognito. Though I guess the incognito part was kind of ruined when you found me in the road.”

I couldn’t help but chuckle a bit. “Yea, not the best place to, um… arrive, I guess. Just how did you get here, anyways?”

“Oh, I used an advanced teleportation spell. Though, I’m not sure whether it was the spell, or the concussion, but I can’t do much magic at the moment. So much for my disguise,” she said, whispering the last part.

“What was that?” I said with a cocked eyebrow.

“N-nothing. In any case, I’m sure my magic will recharge over time.”

Now it was my turn to have a dumfounded look on their face. “Spells? Magic? You’re kidding, right? That stuff doesn’t exist here.”

“You can guess why I’m here, but you don’t believe me when I tell you about magic? Also, you don’t have any magic here?”

“Nope. Well, aside from works of fiction, there’s acts and cheap parlor tricks, but all that is staged. But hey, who needs magic when we got the intellect to create almost anything. Emphasis on the ‘almost.’”

Twilight opened her mouth as if to say something, but I beat her to it. “But that can wait ‘til later.” I said, resulting in a pout from the unicorn.

“Something else I’d like to know is, how were you planning on studying us? I mean, I’m pretty sure people you notice something like you walking around.”

“Well, there again, I know a special spell to turn me into a human, and still retain my magical abilities. Even though I was taught by my mentor, it still took me almost a month to master it.”

My brow furrowed. “Wait, you’re here to study humans, right? But this is your first time seeing one, I presume?” I asked as I began to grow a bit concerned.

“In person, yes.”

“…Then how did you know how we looked like, much less how to change your body to match that of a human’s?”

Twilight paused to contemplate the question. “Well, my mentor showed me how, step by step. She even lent me a diagram or two on human anatomy to study so that I wouldn’t be damaging myself internally during the transformation. However, I’m not sure how she knows about human anatomy. When I asked her about it, she never really gave me a straight answer…”

“Well gee, that’s not suspicious at all,” I remarked, this time allowing my sarcasm to flow freely. But seriously though, something about what she was saying made me incredibly uncomfortable. But, not wanting to take the risk, I concluded to inquire upon the subject at a later time.

“Right, well… is there anything else you’d like to know?” she asked. I rubbed my chin in thought for a second.

“Nnnnnope, I got nothin’ else right now. Maybe later, though.”

“Guess it’s my turn,” she said, leaning up in my chair. “So, do you know anything else about what happened to me in the road? I mean, what do you think hit me?”

“Probably a car. They have a nasty tendency to drive on roads, you see,” I said jokingly to try and cover for my twitching eye. “Then again, do you even know what a car is?”

“Nope,” she said with a shake of her head.

“Well, where to begin… You see, a car is a complicated machine. It’s got a fuel-driven engine that turns a set of four wheels beneath it-“

“So it’s an automobile?”

“Yea, basically.” A puzzled look grew on my face. “But I thought you said you didn’t know what a car was.”

“I know what an automobile is, yes. I’ve just never heard it called a ‘car’ before. Besides, only the richer ponies use them as a sort of luxury.”

“hmph. We’ve moved far beyond that over here. Cars are mass-produced on a factory lines day by day.” I said, thinking back to what it might have been like in the early 1900’s, back when cars were the newest ‘craze’.

“Woah… that sounds amazing,” Twilight said in a sense of awe, her eyes growing ever bigger.

“I suppose. Though, I don’t know much about that sort of thing. Anything else you’d like to know?” Twilight shook her head to clear away the initial fascination.

“Right, sorry. So you say I was hit by a car? How do you think it happened?”

“Well, I’m just guessing here, but I’d say you accidentally ‘teleported’ in front of one as it was driving by. Not that I’d know that, of course. I didn’t see anything or anyone around when I found you,” I said, beginning to get nervous.

“C’mon man, keep it together!” a voice in my head said. As it did, two mental duplicates of myself appeared in my head. One had a white shirt that said ‘impulse’ in black, whereas the other had a black shirt that said ‘logic’.

“Don’t you crack now, man, you don’t know what this thing’ll do if it knows you hit her!” Logic continued sternly.

“Dangit, we can’t keep lying forever!” Impulse interjected. “She’s gonna find out, man! I know it!”

“I said keep it together!” Logic said as he grabbed Impulse’s shirt. “We can’t let ourselves slip!”

“Oh man…” Impulse said, his lip beginning to quiver. “What if it really is magical? What if it’s reading our mind? What if it already knows we hit it, and is just toying with us while it waits for its moment to strike?!”

“What are you, crazy?” Logic slapped impulse across the face. “It can’t read minds, you idiot!”

“If it can teleport here and turn itself into a human, who says it can’t read minds?” They both looked to Twilight, who just sat there looking at me in silence. A nervous look was growing on her face as I sat there.

“Oh lord…” Logic said in a deep, fearful voice. “You’re right… Quickly, act natural! Lalalalalalalalala-”

Twilight shifted her eyes a bit, slowly taking another sip of her cup o’ jimmie.

“It’s not workin man! She’s onto us!” Impulse cried out in panic.

“Damnit! Act more natural! LALALALALALALALALALALA-“

“So-“ Twilight said, breaking the silence.

“Hmm?” I blinked a few times to regain focus.

“I, uh… I was wondering, why did you react the way you did when you heard my name? Something about a movie?”

“Oh, that-”

“Thank heavens, she’s changing the subject,” Logic said with a relieved sigh.

“-Well, the ‘Twilight’ films are movie renditions of a popular book series about vampires and werewolves and crap. It’s just… the movies are so horrible. The story is bunk, the characters are about as bland as a bowl of rice, and… and… its shit!” Twilight’s eyes widened slightly at the cursing.

“Some idiot teenager chick falls in love with a moronic emo vampire named Edward, who I loathe in particular for making my name look bad, and then some werewolf falls in love with her, and a war starts, and she gets pregnant, and she dies, and then she’s a vampire, and vampires don’t F*CKING SPARKLE IN THE SUN-“ I cut myself short, realizing I was losing my grip. “…Sorry, I can get carried away at times. But yea, I’m not a fan.”

“Well…” Twilight blinked her widened eyes. “That’s, um… I guess that explains why you freaked out earlier.” I nodded my head to one side.

“Anyways, changing the subject, are you hungry? Cause’ I sure am.”

“I could go for something a bit more substantial than a cup of hot chocolate, yes.”

“How’s pancakes and eggs sound?” A grin began to spread across my face.

“That sounds good!”

“Not only that, but they are good. I don’t want to seem like I’m bragging, but I can make some pretty darn good pancakes.” I chuckled. “Heck, I’d even go so far as to say it’s my special talent. Though my other hobbies would be a close second,” I said, motioning to the work station behind me.

“Oooh, what do you do?”

“Banker by profession, but writer, drawer, and part-time animator by personal interest. I’ve written a couple of popular stories so far, though I’m focusing a bit more on the drawing side of things recently.”

“Sounds interesting” she continued, looking past me to the equipment I had set up.

“It has its ups and downs, but more on that later. I’m hungry!” I stood up and walked over to Twilight. “You want another glass o’ jimmie before I get cookin?” She nodded and held up the mug with a hoof. I grabbed the mug but paused for a second, wondering how she was even able to hold it without any fingers.

“Thanks,” she said kindly, cutting off my curious thought.

“Huh? Oh, right, no problem.” I turned and walked to the kitchen with a smile on my face.

“That’s right, go make her some of your pancakes. Anything to keep her from asking us about how she got hit,” Logic said.

“Shhhhh! She could still be listening!” Impulse waved his arms around, but Logic pushed him away.

“Right, act natural. Just smile and wave, friend,” Logic said as I turned and gave a little wave, to which Twilight smiled and returned the kind gesture.

“Just smile and wave.”

Author's Note

Post releaase note: yes, aparently the site or story or something is bugged, making it not show updates for most people. In fact, It didnt even register as published for me until over half an hour later.

In light of this, for those people who arent getting its updates, just keep an eye out for it on saturday about every two weeks. With any luck, I'll be able to post steady chapters along this schedule.

Again, I apologize for the technical issues, but I know as much about it as you folks.

Thanks for reading, and have a nice day.
~Fecler

Chapter 4

I set Twilight’s mug on the counter before bending down to open one of the cabinets beside the stove. It took me but a moment to find the item of interest – a foldable pancake and waffle maker, which I carefully pulled out and set on the stove. I unfolded it horizontally across the stovetop, making sure the removable metal trays were both flipped to the ‘pancake making’ side. Though I did plug it in, I opted to wait to turn it on, seeing as I still had to mix the batter, fix Twilight’s cup o’ Jimmie, and other such things.

Thinking about my guest first, I opened up the cabinet above the sink and grabbed a couple more bags of hot chocolate mix, as well as an open box of pancake mix. Although…

“Hey Twilight,” I asked loud enough for her to hear. “What kinda’ pancakes you gonna want?”

“…Regular is fine,” she replied after a second or two of silence. I shrugged contently.

“Okie doke, just makin’ sure,” I said, closing the cabinets and setting the box of mix and the chocolate packs on the counter. I ripped open the two packs, pouring them into the mug before adding hot water and stirring them thoroughly. However, as I went to set the pot of hot water back in the sink, a sudden, shrill screech caused me to drop it.

“GAH- What?! What the h-” I was cut short as Twilight shuffled past me as fast as she could inn reverse before slamming into the back door. Even then, her legs were still desperately trying to push her back, as though they were trying to force her through the very fibers of the door.

“S- s- s- s-” she sputtered frightfully, her wide eyes and pinprick pupils focused on the living room.

“S- s- s- something the matter?” I mimicked, trying to calm her down more than make fun.

“S- s- SNAAAAAAKE!!”

“Oh, nice going Brain. Just go ahead and scare the skin off our guest,” Logic shouted irritably.

“Oh, oh! I’m thinking of a funny,” Impulse said giddily. Logic looked to him with a bemused look.

“Might as well hear what you got.” Impulse leaned over and whispered something in his ear. “…That’s actually kinda funny,” Logic said with a chuckle. “Sure, let’s do it. But we’re backing out at the first sign of trouble.”

“But of course.”

“Ok, ok, calm down. I’ll go see what you’re talking about.” Twilight’s eyes shifted up to me for a split second before returning to their previous focus.

I turned and casually headed back into the living room, rolling my eyes at the sight I was confronted with. There, draped across my arm chair, hung my 7-foot, brown and pale-grey corn snake. From the looks of it, I guessed that he had somehow gotten up to the top of the chair and slithered down over Twilights shoulder. He always liked to startle me like that as well. As I approached the large snake, currently beginning to curl up in the seat of the chair, I couldn’t help but cross my arms and shake my head.

“What am I going to do with you?” He stopped moving and looked up to me, flicking his tongue out a couple of times.

“No, I don’t want excuses. You know better than to sneak up and scare visitors like that.” His stare was unrelenting.

“Yes, I know I hardly ever have any guests anyways, but still-” Our eyes met.

“…Dangit, how can I stay mad at you with a face like that?” I bent over and picked him up gingerly, draping him across my shoulders. “You cheeky little rapscallion, you’re just so adowabul! But you gotta’ stop breaking out of your terrarium, ya’ dig? One of these days you’re gonna’ hurt yourself.” I turned to look back at the kitchen.

“…C’mon, I got a plan,” I whispered as I wrapped him around my neck once. Holding the loose loop around my neck with one hand, and the other holding him near his head, I turned and began walking in the most generically ‘scared’ way I could manage.

“Oh no,” I said blandly, “It has me. Aaaaaaah.” I was really beginning to laugh internally until I heard a high pitched yelp, followed by a splash of searing hot chocolate in my face. I scrunched my face up instinctively to try and be a man by toughing out the pain.

“…Ow.” I let go of Brain’s loop around my neck and tried to wipe the liquid from my face. “A bit excessive, don’t you think,” I asked Twilight irritably. When I managed to clear my eyes I saw she was still pushed up against the door, breathing heavily as she stared at me.

“Relax. Brain aint gonna hurt you, are ya’?” I turned his head to me and grinned happily. He simply stared back at me, tickling my nose with a flick of his tongue. “Nawww, he wouldn’t hurt a fly.”

“I- …Ph-phobia-” Twilight stammered.

“Eh? A phobia? …of snakes?” Twilight shook her head vigorously.

“Oh great plan there, ya freakin’ dumbbell.” Logic stated as he slapped the back of Impulse’s head.

“Well you thought it’d be funny too!” Impulse replied defensively. Logic simply stared at him for a second before slapping him across the back of his head again.

“Oh… well dang. Sorry, I had no idea.” I said, my smile falling. “I’ll just put him back in his terrarium.” I walked over and unwrapped Brain from around my neck before gently lowering him into the terrarium and placing the lid back on.

“There, safe and sound. Happy now?” I looked around the corner to see Twilight shaking her head vigorously. “Ok,” I said, rolling my eyes slightly. I stepped into the guest bedroom and grabbed a roll of duct tape off the shelf to the left of the door. As I began to step out of the room, I couldn’t help but look at the long metal box at the foot of the bed, considering its contents. Logic muttered the lock’s combination to himself.

“No,” I thought, “…I shouldn’t jump to such conclusions.” I turned back to the hallway and closed the door behind me. With a loud ‘VWOP’, I pulled out and ripped off a couple of pieces, which I used to tape the lid to the terrarium.

“Ok, the lid is literally taped on. Now are you happy?” I saw that Twilight was still pressing herself against the door.

“You know…” Logic said, a bemused expression creeping onto his face, “I don’t really see this thing as some evil thing that’s ‘playing nice’.”

“Well, maybe… but how can we be sure?” Impulse replied skeptically.

“We can’t. But even so, if she really is evil, I think we could take her.”

“Say whaaaaaaaa-?”

“Look, she’s obviously afraid of snakes, she herself said her magical capabilities were at a minimum, and we’re not exactly some five-foot weakling that can’t defend himself. I’m pretty sure we at least stand a remote chance if things turn pear-shaped.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” Impulse said quietly, considering what Logic had gone over.

“And,” Logic continued, “I think we need to tell her about how we hit her.”

“Wait, what?! Nonono-”

“Yes! Look man, it’s gonna get out sooner or later, and the longer we put it off the bigger hole we’re digging for ourselves. We have to tell her,” Logic continued. Impulse opened his mouth to speak, but closed it and looked away in thought.

“…Okay. Just don’t screw it up though.”

“Do I ever?” Logic concluded sternly.

“Yes,” Impulse said dryly. “[]More often than you’d like to admit.”

Logic simply smirked and rolled his eyes. Although that issue was settled for now, I still had the situation of Twilight’s phobia to deal with. Unable to think of anything, I walked over to where she was and looked down at her.

“Come on,” I said plainly, “You have nothing to fear.” She didn’t even look up to me as I sighed irritably.

“Ok, guess I’ll have to show you.” I reached down and wrapped my right arm under her midsection, which felt brain-numbingly soft, and lifted her up. Immediately she began pushing at me with her hooves, trying to get me to set her down.

“N- no! Let me down!” she cried out frantically.

“Not until you get over this snake thing, and since you’re obviously not going to on your own accord, it seems I’ll have to convince you that Brain is harmless.” I turned, Twilight under arm, and looked into the terrarium. Brain looked up to us from where he lay curled up in the corner.

Twilight stopped squirming and stared at it, her mouth slightly agape. I could feel her breathing increase as she began shaking and sweating as the silent stare-off continued. After what I’m sure felt like an eternity for Twilight, Brain flicked his tongue. And, like the straw that broke the camel’s back, the harmless action caused Twilight to lose it. She let out an ear-tearing scream, causing me to wince and desperately cover my ear with my left hand.

I suddenly began to notice a purple glow rapidly intensifying from Twilight’s horn. Before I could even begin to think about what it was, a bright light flashed in my eyes, similar to how a camera would, and Twilight vanished. At the exact moment I noticed a similar flash coming from the bathroom, and I hurriedly stepped to investigate.

There, curled up in the bathtub, lay Twilight. Her eyes were wide open and her fur was matted from the intense sweating, but the thing I found most troubling was that I saw a crimson spot growing on the bandage wrapped around her head. I knelt down beside the tub and reached toward Twilight’s bandages. To my dismay, she didn’t seem to comprehend my actions, and continued to stare off into space.

I placed a finger on the bandage’s red splotch, noting that it was soaked with exactly what I was afraid it would be. I didn’t know what Twilight had done, aside from the apparent teleportation, but whatever she did was making her wound worse.

“Oh, fantastic job. You broke her!” Logic said snidely.

“It…it’s not my fault!” Impulse pled desperately.

“What were you even trying to do by forcing her to stare at Brain like that, hmm?”

“I was trying to show her that he was harmless, a- and I was going to explain why she shouldn’t be afraid…”

“Well I’d say you were a wee-bit late on that last part; and while explaining is a good idea, might I suggest doing it somewhere where she doesn’t have to stare down her mortal fear?” Logic replied, a touch of sarcasm in his voice.

“Good point.” Impulse replied as I looked back down to Twilight, who was now lying uncomfortably still. “Umm… is she breathing?”

I placed my pointer and index fingers on her neck to check for a pulse. Needless to say, it was a great relief to feel that it was still there. Presuming she had passed out, I pulled her eyelids shut gingerly and stood up. Of course, I couldn’t just leave her bandages in such a poor state; they were likely to get infected if they were kept that way. Getting the medical supplies from the shelves above the toilet, I repeated the process that I had done the night before, however this time Twilight didn’t wake up to help.

After a good ten minutes of doctoring the poor pony, I gently lifted her up and carried her into the living room. I set her on the small sofa in the corner opposite of the entrance since I was afraid that she might get bloodstains on my arm chair. I stood there and looked at her chest rise and fall harmoniously for a moment, and I couldn’t help but feel the relatively chipper mood I had been in earlier get replaced by a concerned knot that was growing in my chest and stomach.

“Oh yeah Edward, great job,” Logic berated, “What a fine way to introduce this magical creature into our world. ‘Let’s hit it with a car, and then nearly kill it again by showing it our pet snake!’ Yeah, a really fine job you’ve done so far, you freakin’ dunce.”

I continued to stand there, rubbing my forehead in concern and trying to think about what I should do, all while listening to Logic’s scorns. After a good five or six minutes of thought, and even a bit of pacing back and forth, I could only think of one thing I could do that might help the situation at this point. I could go make my pancakes, that way they’d be ready for her when she woke up.

Smiling nervously at what I thought could be my only hope of making up all the stuff that’d happened thus far, I went into the kitchen and began pouring the pancake batter ingredients into a big white bowl and mixing them together. After plugging up the foldable griddle and letting it preheat for a bit, I slapped a slab of butter on each side and poured the first two pancakes. The sizzle of the butter and the aroma of cooking batter tingled my senses, helping clear my mind so that I could begin working on a good apology.

Chapter 5

Twilight stirred from her unconscious state, the sweet scent of breakfast filling her nostrils. Her eyes fluttered open, looking around to see where she was. The room was easily identified as the cabin’s living room, which meant that she was on the couch. She couldn’t recall how she had gotten there though. The last thing she could remember was that snake, shuddering at the terrifying recollection.

Trying to push the memory out of her head, she looked into the kitchen. She saw me standing over the stove, but she couldn’t see the stove itself on account of the fridge blocking her view. However, she concluded thatever I was fixing smelled delicious.

About this time, I flipped the last two pancakes onto the serving plate and spread butter over them. Setting the plate to the side, I reached past the foldable griddle to unplug it. Gathering up the utensils, I piled them into the empty batter bowl, and I put them all in the sink before filling the bowl with warm water. I’d have to let the griddle’s cooking-plates cool before washing them, so I moved on to put the tub of butter back in the fridge.

As I closed the refrigerator door, I turned around to see how Twilight was doing. She was laying there with her legs folded beneath her and her head held upright, looking at me in a sort of blank expression. To know she was awake and presumably well brought a smile to my face, though my stomach turned a bit as I recalled how foolish I had been earlier. Trying to focus on more positive thoughts, I stepped back into the kitchen and grabbed the plate of pancakes.

“Wakey wakey, eggs and bakey,” I said light heartedly as I stepped into the room. Her eyes instantly focused on the plate piled with three stacks of four pancakes. I grinned again at the surprised look on her face.

“I didn’t know what kind you liked, so I went ahead and made them all regular, or ‘classic’, as I prefer.” I set the plate on the small eating table, which was pushed into the corner to the right of the couch.

“You eat pancakes, right?” I asked. After all, I honestly had no idea what she ate. We had not yet reached that topic in our earlier conversation before things went pear-shaped.

Twilight nodded, looking from the pancakes to me. “Y-yes, of course. They smell delicious… thank you.”

“No, thank you,” I said politely as I nodded my head a bit. I turned and headed back to the kitchen to get the rest of the food, as well as the utensils. “What about eggs? You eat scrambled eggs?”

“Sometimes, but not that often. Why, did you make some?”

“Yeah, I made a few,” I said clearly so that she could hear me from the kitchen. I lifted out a couple of plates from the cabinet and set them on the counter. “…Don’t suppose you eat bacon though.” I grabbed two sets of silverware and set them on the plates.

“What’s bacon?” Twilight asked plainly.

I grinned as I picked up the serving plate with eggs and bacon in one hand, and the eating plates in the other. “Oh, it’s only the second half of what is considered an average breakfast,” I said as I walked back into the living room and set the plates on the table. “Though, if you’re looking for specifics, it’s fried strips of pig meat.”

Twilight’s curious expression shifted drastically to one of horror, her pupils shrinking and her jaw dropping. Guess she was a vegetarian, just like the ponies here were.

“Now, before you go jumping to conclusions, allow me to explain,” I said abruptly in hopes she was still open to listening to reason. “Humans, as a species, are omnivores, meaning we eat plants and animals. But don’t fret, because we have considerably picky tastes when it comes to our meats. In this region the most preferred meats are cow, also known as beef, pigs, aka pork, chicken, aka… chicken, and turkey.” I took a step toward Twilight, however she recoiled her head slightly at my advancement. “So don’t worry. We don’t eat horses or ponies. …and yes, there are ponies here, though they hardly share any resemblance to you aside from having hooves,” I concluded with a shrug.

Twilight closed her mouth and broke eye contact, looking down in contemplation. I grabbed a strip of bacon and folded it into my mouth, chewing on the savory strip of meat. My actions caught Twilight’s attention. She looked back up to me with a concerned look on her face. An awkward silence fell over the two of us.

My chewing slowed to a stop before I rolled my eyes. “Look, I’m not going to eat you, okay? That is literally never going to happen. So do you wanna take a seat and have some pancakes before they get cold, or would you prefer sitting there staring at me for a while longer?” I said in a playful tone.

An audible gurgling noise came from Twilight’s stomach. “…Yeah, okay,” she said, looking down to her tummy. “I really am hungry now that I think about it.”

I set a plate with silverware at her place on the table before pulling the seat out and motioning to it formally. “Then by all means, please, be seated.”

Twilight carefully got down from the couch and walked over to the chair, hopping up on it. She sat on her rump with her forehooves in-between her legs. I heard a comment in the back of my head at how cute she lookedwhen sitting like that as I pushed the chair back to the table, making sure to leave her enough room. However, seeing that neither the chair nor the table were made ponies, the table was considerably tall for her.

“I could get a pillow for you to sit on, if you want,” I asked her.

She looked up to me with a small smile just noticeable on her face. “I’d appreciate it.”

I reached over to the couch and grabbed a thick, firm pillow from beside the arm rest. “Here,” I said, pulling the chair back out. I placed the pillow on the seat once Twilight had hopped down. I helped her back up on the pillow and pushed the chair back to the table.

“How’s that?” I inquired.

“Much better, thanks,” Twilight said sweetly.

I tipped an invisible hat politely in response before moving to the chair adjacent to hers and taking a seat. As I reached my fork out to snag a couple of pancakes, I heard a clatter as Twilight winced. My hand froze as I turned to Twilight, who was rubbing her bandage. A rather dismayed look was on her face as she looked down to the fork, which was laying half way between her plate and the pancakes.

“…Something the matter?” I asked, genuinely concerned.

“Ugh, I can’t even levitate anything!” She looked up to me, blinking at the perplexed look on my face. “…Levitation is one of the most basic spells of magic,” she said matter-of-factly.

“Right… so, you need a hand?” I asked, looking down to the fork.

“I can’t make a hand without my magic, remember?”

“No, no,” I said, grinning at her misunderstanding. “If someone ‘needs a hand’ then they are in need of help.”

“Oh, you mean like lending someone a hoof?”

“Well, I guess that makes sense for ponies…” I zoned out for a second, wondering how many more ponified puns there must be where she comes from. …Would ‘ponified’ even count as one?

Anyways, I pushed the pony-pun-conundrum to the back of my head for later. Using my fork I skewered a couple of pancakes and gingerly moved them to her plate, after which I put my fork down and moved hers back beside the plate. I retracted my hands and smiled hopefully.

“Is that enough pancakes for you, or you want some more?” I inquired.

“That’s enough for now, thank you,” she replied kindly.

“Okie dokie then. Would you like some eggs? Maybe some ba-” I stopped myself, remembering who I was talking to. “Oh… right.”

Twilight’s nose scrunched a bit. “Yeah, no… thanks,” She said, trying to turn down the awkward offer.

“Yeah…” I reached over as subtly as I could and turned the plate so that the bacon was facing me. Picking up my fork again, I stabbed a stack of four pancakes and brought them to my plate. I looked across the table for the syrup, only to mentally slap myself and sigh.

“Derp-it-all, I forgot the syrup,” I said as I stood up from my seat. As I turned I looked down to Twilight, sitting there looking at her pancakes. Her forehooves rested against the side of the table. Again, I slapped myself as another realization hit me.

“Hooves, you fool! How is she to eat without hands?” I thought to myself agitatedly. I stood there a second to ponder the question before sighing and heading towards the kitchen. I just hoped that she wouldn’t eat by shoving her… face, I guess, into the food and snarfing it down. Of course, I had already pegged her to be more civilized than that… then again it was still technically an animal.

“Gah, I don’t know,” I concluded, rolling my eyes. “I just hope she doesn’t make a mess.”

I opened the cabinet and grabbed the nearest open syrup bottle, eyeing it for a brief second to make sure it had enough for the number of pancakes I had fixed. I closed the cabinet and turned to head back to the living room, but froze. I thought I could see Twilight using the utensils. Not just flailing around with them either, oh no. She was clearly holding one in each hoof.

As I got closer to the table, I was sure I wasn’t just seeing stuff. I stood by my place at the table, my face exhibiting a stupefied expression as I watched her cut her pancakes.

“Uhh…” I uttered unintentionally.

Twilight looked up to me, raising a brow. “What…?”

“What, um…” I paused, rubbing my chin scruff as I tried to piece together how I was going to ask this question. “Well, if… if you don’t mind my asking, how are you holding that without hands?” I finally spoke up, pointing to the silverware.

“Oh, well you see, there are a series of neurocells that run through the inner-most circle of our hooves that allow us to…” Her expression flattened slightly when she noticed the extremely confused look on my face.

“…Because magic,” she said bluntly.

I nodded slowly. “Riiight… you want syrup, right?” I asked, trying not to think of her freaky hoof powers.

“Yes please,” She replied.

I drizzled the syrup across her cut-up pancakes before taking a seat and drizzling syrup across my un-cut pancakes. She began eating almost as soon as I had poured the syrup, however I sat there quietly to let my pancakes absorb the syrup. Sitting there also gave me a few moments to go over my thoughts and make sure that what I was about to do went well. After a minute or two of staring at my pancakes on contemplation, I looked up to my guest.

“Hey, Twilight?” I asked politely.

Twilight swallowed her mouthful of syrupy pancake mush and looked to me. “Yes?”

“I… I’d like to apologize for earlier this morning.” I looked down to the table and rubbed my brow as I continued. “I know it was early, but I don’t usually go nutsy like that… Also, I’m sorry about all that with Brain. He really is harmless, but looking back I know that wasn’t exactly the best way to show it. Especially considering your phobia.”

The uncomfortable rumblies in my tummy inclined me to pause a moment to see how Twilight would react. Her gaze seemed to look distant for a moment, deep in thought.

“…It’s okay,” she said plainly. “As I said before, I had expected much worse, considering the foreign nature of this place. For all I knew, the first person I met could try to kill me. In any case, I was most certainly not expecting a hearty pancake breakfast.” She let out a single, somewhat nervous chuckle.

“Speaking of which,” she continued, “These are very good.”

I smiled meekly. “Thank you. I do like to think that if I was good at anything, it would be making pancakes.”

“Well that you certainly are,” Twilight said, stuffing another couple of pancake chunks into her mouth.

“Thanks, I appreciate it.”

My smile faded as I worked up the nerve to continue. Twilight looked at me, obviously taking notice of the concerned look on my face. Her chewing slowed almost to a stop before she swallowed.

“…What is it?” she asked slowly.

I. Looking back, I always have been a bundle of nerves when confronting someone about something that I feared would bring them displeasure. I’m not quite sure why, but it certainly didn’t help me in situations like this.

“Twilight, you need to know,” I began, in a calm tone of voice. “Last night, when you arrived… I hit you with my car.” I paused for a quick moment, figuring out what to say next. “Now, I know how it sounds right off the bat, but trust me. It was a complete accident. I mean, you literally teleported directly in front of my car. I didn’t even know I had hit something- er… you, until I stopped and looked behind me.” I held my hands up defensively. “It was a total accident for which I did, and do, feel bad for, and I truly am sorry for hurting you like I did.”

I crossed my arms, looking around the table in nervous anticipation of Twilight’s reply to the newfound information. After what felt like half an hour, to me at least, I was met with a response.

“…That’s alright,” Twilight said plainly.

I turned to her and cocked an eyebrow, my mouth hanging open slightly in a stupor. “Y-you sure?”

“Well, yeah.” She shrugged. “I mean, you honestly don’t seem like the kind of guy who’d do something like that intentionally. And even if you somehow were, you still took the time to doctor my wounds, and even make a hearty breakfast for me. So, considering the circumstances, I understand that it was an accident, and I appreciate all that you’ve done for me.” A genuine smile spread on her face.

I couldn’t help but chuckle at how well she had taken it. It certainly did relieve any worry of some enraged freak-out. I looked back down to my pancakes and grinned, enjoying the refreshed feeling of letting something off my chest without the situation devolving into some inflamed argument or rant.

I cut a slice out of my stack of syrup-soaked pancakes and stuffed it in my mouth, feeling like I was able to truly savor the sweetness of it. I chewed slowly to make it last before eventually swallowing. As I did, I couldn’t help but feel like it was going to be a good day.

Author's Note

To those of you who are wondering why Edward is describing Twilight's actions in the first two paragraphs, he's adding a few things based on how he thought they would've happend so as to improve the feel of his 'story'. :raritywink:

also, upon readin feedback, allow me to elaborate upon Twilight's reaction to Edward eating meat.
She is not 'freaking out', so much as she is concerned by the revelation that he does eat meat. After all, if you met something that was twice your size that told you "by the way, I eat meat," right before a meal, the i'm sure you would be a little concerned as well. On the other hand, if she was freaking out, she's be trying to get away and/or begin screaming. :twilightblush:
so do with this information what you will, dear readers. :twilightsmile: