Cheese Sandwich awoke. He contemplated calling in sick, but ultimately decided to get up. For he was no couch potato. He rose from his bed, getting Boneless II ready for the day of party-planning and party-executing. He had a big day ahead of him, and if he didn't get cracking, he might backslide into the dreaded generic blues.
After combing his mane and washing up, he and Boneless II left their accordion-shaped house and ventured out into Ponyville. He thought about taking the Jackson Park Express, but he didn't want to be known as another one to ride the bus. Ultimately, he simply walked across the street to Sugarcube Corner, where breakfast–and Pinkie Pie–awaited him.
He walked in, spotting her at the counter. Cheese wanted to rush over and embrace the mare of his dreams, but stopped. She was in the middle of setting out freshly-made baked goods, and it wouldn't do to rush over. It'd be risky, almost as dangerous as running with scissors.
Pinkie Pie finished setting out her wares. She glanced up, spotting Cheese and grinning. Hey, Cheese! Perfect timing!” The grin fell away as her mane bobbed down in front of her eyes. She batted at it, scowling. “Lousy haircut! Last time I have Rainbow Dash do it!”
Cheese trotted over. He looked over the cupcakes, the muffins, the bread, and a few other baked goods. “Hmm, so many choices.”
Pinkie waved him off. “Whatever you choose, you'll just eat it anyway. They won't even have time to be living in the fridge.”
Cheese nodded. “True.” He reared up on his hind legs, forelegs spread wide. “Surprise me-but no alligator this time, Pinkie. I don't think Gummy liked the trip.”
Pinkie rolled her eyes. “Better than that aardvark that almost decapitated Boneless II that one time.” She glanced down at a clipboard on the counter, than up at Cheese. “Sorry to bring this up, but Mister Cake is wondering when you'll repay him those thirty bits you owe him.”
Cheese pasted a grin on his muzzle. “The check is in the mail?” His ears pinned back. “Okay, sorry about that. I overspent on some accordion polish and a new case for it.”
“Such lovely first world problems,” Pinkie finally said, winking at him. “Just letting you know about it. We still on for noon?”
Cheese's brow furrowed. “For noon? What's happening then?” He suddenly gasped. “Is it some sort of super-secret party we'll be putting on?”
Pinkie shook her head. “No, silly. Sometimes, girls just wanna have lunch!”
Cheese left Sugarcube Corner, stomach a little fuller than before. His ears twitched as Lyra and Bonbon rode by on a bicycle built for two. He waved as they passed, grinning.
Lyra, in front, waved back, grinning. Bonbon, in back, rang the bicycle's daisy bell. Lyra's grin fell away and her foreleg slammed back onto the handlebar as the bicycle drifted into the path of an oncoming Scootaloo on a scooter. She swerved, but still clipped Scootaloo, sending her and Bonbon careening into the Apple family's apple stand. Applejack and Big Mac nickered as they dove out of the way. Lyra and Bonbon crashed into several barrels of apples, sending the produce flying.
Cheese shook his head. “I guess it's true what Octavia told me. She does drive like crazy!” He trotted over, cantering about to avoid stepping on any apples rolling his way. He kicked an apple basket off of Lyra. “I know that grapefruit diet's got you hungry, but I think this is a bit too far.”
Lyra's eyes narrowed as she stared up at him. Her horn glowed and several apples floated into the air. She tossed them at Cheese, but he hopped back, his body seeming to turn to rubber as he dodged each and every one. “Ooh, close, but no cigar!”
Applejack walked over to Lyra. “You gonna be paying for those?” she asked, eyes narrowing.
Lyra raised a foreleg and opened her mouth, but let out a short, strangled gasp. She winced and rubbed the back of her neck.
Applejack waved her off. “Oh, no you don't! You're not giving me any sort of achey-breaky song or dance routine, Lyra!” She stamped a hoof on the grass. “With the amount of damage you and Bonbon did here, you could buy me a condo with all the bits you owe us!”
Big Mac trotted up to Applejack's side. “Eyup!”
Cheese cantered back and around to get out of Applejack and Big Mac's line of sight. No way did he want to get caught in the middle of that. “I can't watch this,” he muttered as he trotted away. He glanced back as Applejack continued to harangue Lyra. Featherweight was hovering around them, snapping pictures.
Next to Cheese, Rainbow Dash started snickering. “Heh, that'll make the Foal Free Press, no doubt. Ah, Lyra. What a lame claim to fame!” She looked to Cheese. “Good thing you didn't get caught up in that, Cheese!”
Cheese nodded. “Yup. I have a feeling Lyra might have to sell some of her instruments on Craig's List.”
Rainbow Dash arched an eyebrow. “Sell her instruments on what?”
Cheese's own brow furrowed for a second. “Oh, right. It's an advertisement in the Hoofington's local paper, the Hoofington Hurrah. I guess you wouldn't read that too often?”
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. “Oh, that rag? I accidentally got on a mailing list for it, somehow got twenty copies a day! I had to have Twilight do some royal stuff to get them to stop forwarding those horse apples to me!”
“A shame. Last week they had an article on the biggest ball of twine in Manesota!” With that, Cheese turned and trotted off.
Cheese sat at one of A'la Cart, Ponyville's premier open-air restaurant. Pinkie sat across from him, gesturing wildly with her front hooves. “And then Tender Taps and Apple Bloom did this super-high jump and nearly hit their heads on the rafters! But they managed not to make any holes in the ceiling.” She let out a sigh. “That colt could dance.”
Any response from Cheese was cut off by Filthy Rich and Diamond Tiara as they walked up to the table. Filthy bowed to the pair. “My apologies for interrupting your lunch. I was just wondering how the planning for Diamond Tiara's party was coming along.”
Pinkie Pie reached into her mane, rummaging around a little before pulling out a thick book. She thumped it onto the table, where it sprang open. Confetti and streamers shot from the pages. “Whoops, a little trigger-happy!” she said. Pinkie leafed through the pages. “Ah, here we are!” She rotated it around for Filthy and Diamond Tiara to look over. “The super-duper party ponies are planning it down to the last detail!”
Diamond Tiara leaned over, eyes narrowing. “Well, not bad.” She glanced up. “Just don't do anything crazy or stupid, all right?”
Cheese Sandwich belted out a laugh. “My dear Diamond Tiara? I DARE to be stupid!”
Author's Note
- this is based off of/spun off of/parodied off of Austryeoh by fourths for the Springtime-Sequel-Slash-Sandbox Switcheroo context.
If you're not entirely sure what's going on, go here.
