The day before was Hearts and Hooves Day (thus making today, as Pinkie would call it, Discounted Chocolate Day). After another disappointing year without a romantic prospect to share the day, Rarity had called all of her friends for a sleepover, mostly as the perfect opportunity to vent and gripe about it with them. They'd arrived to find Carousel Boutique lit by dozens of candles and packed to the gills with chocolates and other decadents. They piled in, and before long, Rarity had got them discussing their own romantic experience.
"Honestly, I don't understand why I've had such poor luck," Rarity said through a mouthful of chocolate turtles. "It seems to me as though every stallion I fall in love with is either a brute or a clueless dolt."
"Ah've been tryin' to tell ya, Rares," said Applejack, "what ya really need is a fellow businesspony to match wits with ya. What happened to that gentlecolt who runs the music shop I set you up with?"
Rarity snorted. "Please. If the goal of dating him was to 'match wits,' he was sorely lacking on that front. No thank you." She looked over at Fluttershy. "Has Applejack been setting you up with dates, too, darling?"
"Sometimes," she replied softly. "I went on three dates with Razzlebright, the berry grocer. She was nice, but..." She looked over at Applejack and cringed. "...loud."
"Wait, Razzlebright's available?" said Starlight, peeking up from her scroll. "I thought for sure she was seeing that shipping stallion. I may have to go ask her out tomorrow."
"Well, my relationship with Soarin' is going great!" said Rainbow Dash.
"Ya've been on one date with him," Applejack remarked.
"Y-yeah, well, it's going well for one date! And he's the first stallion I've gone out with, so I want to make sure it turns out okay."
"Not to mention you work with him," Pinkie Pie added. "I'm sure it'd be reeeeally awkward if you broke up."
Rainbow Dash blushed and pursed her lips. "...Eeyeah." She shook her head. "What about you, then, Pinkie? Who's been your special somepony?"
"I'm never going to settle down with just one pony!" Pinkie replied cheerfully. "My heart's just waaaay too big for that! But I have gotten all kissy-face with..." She held out her hooves and began to count. "Three pony stallions, six pony mares, two griffon sires, a changeling, a hippogriff mare, and two humans in Twilight's mirror world."
"Pinkie!" Twilight waved an accusing hoof. "The mirror isn't supposed to be used for you to... to get more notches in your saddle belt! When did you even do that?"
"You had it open that one time, and I slipped in! C'mon, it's not that big a deal." Pinkie paused. "Granted, one of those two humans was the mirror version of me, but--"
"PINKIE!!!"
"All right, all right, let's all just let it go for now," said Applejack.
"Very well. We still need to hear from you, miss matchmaker," said Rarity. "I hope you're more successful than you've been with Fluttershy and myself."
"W-well, y'know..." Applejack, suddenly embarrassed, ran a hoof through her mane and sported a prominent blush. "Ah haven't had the time, you know, always workin' on the farm. I know I gotta find a stallion to continue the Apple line, but... I dunno, it can wait, I s'pose."
"Nonsense. You've got two siblings who can carry on the bloodline, if that's really so important. If you fall in love with a mare, or aren't looking for anypony at all, that's perfectly okay." Rarity gave a warm smile, and Applejack blushed again and looked away.
"Yer right, of course," Applejack replied. "Even Starlight's had her say, so that leaves just one. You ever been on a date, Twi?"
Twilight hemmed and hawed for a moment, before saying, "Not really."
Rarity began, "Well, that's quite all right, just like I was saying for Applejack, you can--"
"Although I am, uh, married. Kind of."
The silence in that moment was palpable. Rainbow Dash was the first one to speak. "How can you be 'kind of' married, Twilight?!"
"Well, it's complicated, but--"
"Where is your ring, dear?" Rarity butted in. "I know you're not the flashiest accessorizer, but surely you've got your wedding band somewhere amid your things!"
"I don't have one; look, it'll be easier if I--"
"Stallion or mare? Ooh, or both, double marriage, so intense!"
"Stallion, but like I was trying to say--"
"How come ya'll've never mentioned him before? I want to meet him!"
"Well, that's going to be difficult, because--"
"Is it because it didn't work out, Twilight?"
"No, it--GIRLS!"
All at once, everypony stopped talking. Starlight looked up from her scroll. "I'm sorry, did I miss something?"
"Twilight was just telling us she's married, 'kind of,' and we're trying to figure out just what she means by that!" said Rainbow Dash.
"Oh!" She looked at Twilight closely, then her horn lit up, and her magic scanned over Twilight's body. Her eyes lit up, and she smiled. "Fifth-century Korproksima marriage ritual?"
Twilight sighed. "Yep, that's the one."
"Cool." Then she wound her hoof into the scroll and turned to the next section.
"...Explanations for the non-unicorns here?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"And for all the confused unicorns, too?" Rarity added.
"Let me start at the beginning." She looked at Pinkie. "Yes, it was a stallion. He lived in a little town at the bottom of Canterlot Mountain, next to the woods. He's still there, so--" She turned to Applejack. "--that's where he is, if you want to meet him. And no--" She turned to Fluttershy. "--we definitely still love each other, but I don't see him very often. Mostly just when I go up to visit the folks in Canterlot.
"We first met when I was still at Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns. I was doing some self-directed study in the library--Princess Celestia gave me a lot of that, she must have known I would learn more that way than in classes--when he walked in. He was tall, with a brown coat and green mane, and he looked so confident walking through the shelves. I-I couldn't look at him for more than a second or two, he had me so nervous. He put three books in his saddlebags--oh, he's an earth pony, just so you know--and then, he just, he just sat right down at my table!" Twilight blushed and looked away. "There aren't a lot of stallions at Celestia's school, and I can count the number of mares I've been attracted to on my hooves. But the moment he sat down across from me... I knew I was in love.
"He opened his first book, but instead of reading, he just stared at me, with this... curious look on his face. Then, after a few seconds, he beamed and said quietly, 'Hi there! What's your name?' And of course, like an idiot, I said something horribly mangled, like, 'TwtwibrightnoactuallyitstwilightsnorkleSPARKLEsparkletwilightsparklethatsmynametwilightsparklewhatsyours?"
"And he just smiled, like I hadn't made a fool of myself, and said, 'Timber. Timber Spruce. What are you reading?' And I said, 'History, what about you?' and he said '"Business Management for Derps,"' and I said, 'Wow, that's interesting, why are you reading about business management,' and he said--"
"All right, darling, I'm sure this conversation was fascinating, but let's move it along a little, shall we?"
Twilight coughed into her hoof. "Right, sorry. Over the next couple months, Timber would come to the library every day, and we would just... study together. Once he finished the business management books, he started reading history books about the same time period I was reading. I'm sure he thought it was super boring--"
"It sounds super boring," Rainbow Dash added.
Twilight fixed Rainbow with a dirty look. "Right, well, he read it all with me so we could talk about it together. We would go into the group study rooms, so we could talk as loudly as we wanted to, and believe me, we got into some very spirited debates about the Thunderclap Splinter!" She laughed a couple times, but seeing the flat reactions of the other six, her laughter died out, and she continued, "Anyway. That was when we started to bond. I loved him, I knew that much, and I could tell he was falling in love with me."
"And then you started smooching in the group study rooms, right?" Pinkie said eagerly.
"No!" Twilight blushed. "Th-they have glass windows. Everypony would have been able to see."
"Oh." Deflated, Pinkie kicked the ground in front of her and pouted.
"We talked about meeting outside of the library, having real romantic dates, but I was busy with classes, and he was busy getting supplies for his and his sister's fledgling business. And besides, we liked studying together; it was a special romantic thing, just for us. It was on September 16--I remember it clearly--that I told him over a fourth-century scroll about jousting, 'I... I love you a lot, you know,' and he said, 'I love you too, Sparkle.' And then we kept reading, just like that!"
While all the others gave their supportive "aww's," Rarity fainted in a graceful arc. While Applejack brought Rarity back to consciousness, Fluttershy asked, "So what happened next?"
"Well, we did that for a while, and then my classes started to wrap up, and Timber decided to head back home at the end of the week with all the supplies he'd collected. We were reading about the fifth century at that point, and we stumbled upon the Korproksima marriage ritual. It was a somewhat popular form of marriage at the time for unicorns, very simple, required basic materials--"
"Super illegal," Starlight chimed in.
"Not illegal, just..." Twilight waved her hooves in the air. "Because it posed some safety concerns, Celestia published a statement against it, and many areas at the time chose not to recognize it as an official marriage."
"When you say 'some safety concerns...'" Applejack asked.
"That's the thing." She stood up and magicked up a small crystal. "This is Thaumerite. It's a synthetic crystal with a special property: whenever it's inside a unicorn's magic, it becomes completely intangible, phasing through all materials." She moved it through her hoof to demonstrate. "But once you release your magic, it will remain perfectly still wherever you put it. Well, after Thaumerite was created, a group of unicorns thought it would be romantic to take a heart-shaped chunk of it and place it here--" she tapped her barrel "--right next to your heart. It would be an everlasting reminder of your love for each other, known only to the two of you."
Rarity stood agog at this. "So you're saying that right now, there's a little piece of that crystal inside you right now?"
"That's right. I imagine that's what Starlight was scanning for before." She looked over at Starlight, who nodded. "The day before we were bound to split up, we promised to love each other forever, then I put the Thaumerite crystals in our chests. Normally, the couple would do it together, but since Timber Spruce isn't a unicorn, he just held my hoof while I did it for the both of us."
"Doesn't it hurt?" Fluttershy asked.
"Not at all! I was very careful with the whole procedure." Twilight stood a little taller, clearly proud. "Sometimes, if I go running, I can feel my heart pounding against it, but it doesn't hurt. It's a nice reminder of him."
"I take it yer parents were a mite shocked that ya'll got hitched in a library without telling 'em," Applejack said sardonically.
"You know, I honestly didn't think of them when we were doing it," she said meekly. "We were just so in love, and..."
"You were teenagers at the time, so yes, I can imagine," Rarity replied.
"But yeah, they were surprised at first, but I'd told them about him, and--."
"What are we waiting for?!" Pinkie said.
"Waiting for...?"
"Let's go to Timber Spruce's town and have a real wedding for the two of you!"
Twilight laughed to herself. "As fun as that would be, I think it'd be very difficult to explain to his wife."
"His WHAT?!" The ponies around the table all gasped in shock.
"His wife. He's married. For about two years now--oh, three on the 19th!" Twilight explained.
"Foxglove, right?" Starlight asked.
"That's right. How'd you...?"
"She lived with me out in the desert for a few months. Didn't stay long. She mentioned him a lot." Starlight shrugged and moved down on the scroll.
"Starlight, this is serious!" Rarity said. "Twilight's true love has been taken by some... some homewrecker, and--"
"I did say the Korproksima marriage was illegal, didn't I?" Starlight reminded them. At Twilight's look, Starlight amended herself, saying, "Sorry, unofficial."
"Right. See, back then, the unicorn tribe had a very... lax idea of marriage. They didn't believe in 'one true love,' but rather the possibility of many 'true loves.' So the Korproksima marriage was never meant to be a binding, exclusive commitment. He... told me about the marriage ahead of time. I'm not going to lie, a part of me felt hurt, like I wasn't enough for him, but I knew that as long as he still loved me, I could be happy with our relationship as it was. In the end, I gave him my full support, and, well, it's been almost three years."
"And this other mare--Foxglove--she knows about... you two?" Rarity asked.
"Of course! I'd met her before they started dating. She knows about our Korproksima marriage, and she believes the same thing I do: as long as he loves her, she could be content with their relationship. In fact, I was the one who put in their Thaumerite during the wedding ceremony."
"Oh!" Fluttershy gave a short gasp. "So Timber has two little crystals now..."
"Mm-hmm. One for me, and one for Foxglove."
There was a pause. Nopony said anything. Then Fluttershy said quietly, "Well, I think it's romantic..."
"I don't think anypony's saying it ain't romantic, but... hoo-wee! I never woulda expected it from you, Twilight," Applejack replied.
"So daring! A forbidden romance across time and space!" Rarity raved.
"I still don't get it, but... you do you, Twi," Rainbow said.
"...Does this mean you don't want to do a 'We Got Fake-Married Years Ago But We Still Love Each Other Even Though He's Married For Realsies And We're Making It Work' party?"
Twilight laughed. "No, Pinkie, we don't need a party, though I appreciate the thought of it."
In all this, Starlight was silent. Then, she leaned over to Twilight, tapped her on the withers to get her attention, and then whispered something into Twilight's ear. After a few seconds, Twilight replied, "Of course I'd do it for you. I'm sure she'd love it."
Starlight nodded and went back to her scroll.
Rarity said, "So... you haven't been on any dates since?"
"I haven't been on any dates at all," Twilight said. She stuck out her tongue and laughed. "But no, I haven't. I still haven't found the right stallion for me. I know I'll probably never feel for another pony the same thing I feel for Timber, but... maybe I can find something close. Maybe even close enough to do the Korproksima ritual again. At this point, I don't know for sure."
"What do ya feel for Timber?" Applejack asked. "Beggin' yer pardon, but... like Rarity said, ya'll were teenagers, you barely knew each other. You didn't just, you know... get over it?"
"No, that's a fair question." Twilight looked up into the air, and a smile came over her face unprompted. "He's still the most handsome, most charming, most confident stallion I've ever met. He cares about everypony, and he runs his and his sister's nature resort like nopony's business! And his eyes... h-his forelegs..." She suddenly looked down, and you could almost see little puffs of steam shoot out from her ears. "So yes, I do still love him," she whispered.
Rarity looked at her, lips tight, then promptly stood up, jostling the table where all the chocolates were sitting. "What's wrong, Rarity?" Twilight asked.
"Oh, nothing," she replied. "It's just that, I've decided I've got a trip to take tomorrow. I want to go visit this nature resort--what was it called?--"
"The Spruce and Daisy," Twilight replied.
"--yes, the Spruce and Daisy. I want to see for myself the stallion that stole dear Twilight's heart."
"He didn't steal it. He just took a small part of it." She placed her hoof on her chest. "And I think I got a pretty good price for it in return."
