Teacher of the Month

by Flisky

Rating: teen
Tags: Random, Sandbar, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other
Length: 1033

Twilight replaces Applejack and Rainbow Dash.

Twilight replaces Applejack and Rainbow Dash.

Published 2024-02-27 10:20:00 UTC
Last updated 2024-02-27 10:20:00 UTC

Teacher of the Month

"You're fired!" Shouted Twilight

Applejack and Rainbow Dash did a double take,

"Twi, surely you can't mean that?" Asked Applejack,
"I can, and I do. Your reckless actions nearly killed the students."
"Twi, don't you think you're exaggerating? And it was them what saved us anyhow."
"Poor Yona is traumatised, and won't go anywhere without a pool floatie in case she falls in a puddle. You're not fit to be teachers in my school!"

"I quit the Wonderbolts to be a teacher! You can't do this, I'll lose my home!" Rainbow paused, and her eyes glazed over as the future ran through her mind, "I'll have to live under a bridge, eating nothing but cider and playing the harmonica to ward away the winter's chill."

Twilight considered this for a moment,
"You don't eat cid-"
"Eating nothing but cider!"
And with that, Rainbow Dash and Applejack both burst into tears and ran out of Twilight's office.

Meanwhile, Sandbar, Silverstream, Smolder, Gallus and Yona were standing to the side, and had seen the whole thing.

"Where's Ocellus?" Asked Twilight.
"I'm right here." Said the floatie.
"Oh. Ok." Said Twilight.
"The pool won't let us keep their floatie, so I asked Ocellus to fill in" Explained Sandbar.

"But who's going to be in charge of our field trip now?" Asked Silverstream.

Twilight summoned a poppy in a flowerpot and threw it at the students,
"This flower is in charge of the field trip now. It's not like things could get any worse!"

"What the hay." Said Twilight.

The poppy was sitting on a large, luxurious cushion. A label reading 'Leaf Ericson' had been attached to the pot.
Gallus was off to the side, fanning the flower with a palm frond.
Sandbar and Silverstream were sitting next to the flower. Silverstream was holding a bunch of grapes, and Sandbar was seemingly engaged in a whispered conversation with the flower.
Yona and Smolder were sitting on cushions in front of the flower. Yona was wearing socks, a sweater, a winter jacket and a bomber hat.

"Yona, why are you wearing all that?"
"Yak best at being hot!" Bellowed Yona.
"Say 'ah'" cooed Silverstream as she dropped a grape onto the poppy.

Sandbar finished whispering to the flower and drew himself up,
"Leaf Ericson demands a shrubbery!" At this, Smolder got up and ran off.
"What would a poppy want with a shrubbery?" Asked Twilight.
"He's lonely, and he wants to get into the dating scene."

Twilight removed her hoof from her face, and looked around again,
"Where's Ocellus?"
"I'm right here." Said the palm frond.
"Oh. Ok." Said Twilight.
"We couldn't find a palm tree, so I asked Ocellus to fill in." Explained Sandbar.

Then Smolder came back with a small potted bush and put it on the cushion with the poppy.
"Oh, they look so cute together!" Squeed Silverstream
"Oh, yeah, they're a star couple." Grumbled Twilight, "Next thing you know they're going to get married."

"We are gathered here today," Said Sandbar, "to celebrate the union of Leaf Ericson and Flora Croft."
"Celestia, how did this happen?" Pleaded Twilight. Alas, Celestia was busy eating a cake, and was not listening. Like, seriously, it was a chocolate and raspberry cheesecake, who wouldn't want a piece of that?

Sandbar was standing in the middle of the stage, officiating the wedding.
To the left, Leaf Ericson, Gallus, and a cactus were all standing in a line wearing bow ties.
To the right, Flora Croft, Silverstream and a sunflower were all standing in a line. Flora Croft was wearing a white veil, Silverstream and the sunflower were wearing pink berets.
In the back, Yona was playing an organ.
Twilight, Pinkie Pie, Smolder and a large collection of potted plants of various kinds were sitting in the audience.

"Isn't it weird how Leaf Ericson is a flower and Flora Croft is a bush?
"That's not what flora means, Pinkie. Also, where's Ocellus?"
"I'm right here." Said the organ.
"Oh. Ok." Said Twilight.
"There's no way we could afford an organ, so I asked Ocellus to fill in." Explained Sandbar.

Twilight sighed,
"Well, it's not like this really affects me."

"Leaf Ericson needs you to stand down as Principal." Said Sandbar
Twilight said nothing. She glared. She glared at Sandbar, she glared at Leaf Ericson, she glared at me waitwhat? and she glared at everyone else too.

"This graph here," pontificated Sandbar, "indicates that Leaf Ericson surpasses you in every metric relevant to running a school. Popularity, productivity, student performance, et---cetera. It's gotten to the point where he thinks you're holding the school back, so he wants to take over your position, which will enable him to enact radical reforms to truly shape this place into the school you envisioned."

Twilight slowly stood. She glanced at each of whom was present. Sandbar, Leaf Ericson, Gallus, Silverstream, Yona, Smolder. And then she gave an empassioned speech. Truly it was a grand speech, and in it was every reason why she should remain in her position to lead the school into the glorious future it deserved. Tears were shed at the beauty of the speech, and much applause heralded it's ending.

Panting, Twilight sat down heavily on her chair,
"And where's Ocellus?"
"I'm right here." Said Twilight's chair.
"Oh. Ok." Said Twilight, from the ceiling.
"We accidentally broke your chair and we couldn't get a replacement in time so I asked Ocellus to fill in." Explained Sandbar.
"I'm starting to think you just want me for my body." Said Ocellus.

Twilight sighed,
"Well... At least I still have my home."

Twilight was sitting under a bridge. Applejack and Rainbow Dash were sitting next to her, surrounded by empty bottles of cider.

Rainbow Dash was playing a harmonica. If one listened carefully, one might just have heard a song under the noise, begging for help. It was a freezing, snowy winter day, but their little spot under the bridge was far warmer than their surroundings

Applejack poured some half-frozen cider into her mouth and chewed noisily. She glanced at the half-empty bottle, and then she held it out to Twilight.
"Twi, you wa-"
"SHUT UP!"