Pop Fountain

by fourths

Rating: teen
Tags: Other, Fluttershy, Rarity, Random, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 9681

To have tea together is their greatest pleasure, so Rares and Shy sit, sip, and talk.

To have tea together is their greatest pleasure, so Rares and Shy sit, sip, and talk.

Inspired by Ryan North’s Dinosaur Comics.
Sorry.

Published 2018-05-15 18:40:06 UTC
Last updated 2018-12-12 03:50:09 UTC

Pinkie-in’ in the Cupboard

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“Oh, I do love these little get-togethers we have. We should do this more often,” Rarity said.

“We really should. I know I’m busy with the animals so much of the time, but that’s not a reason not to see you.” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “Oh, yes, yes. And I with my boutiques. Honestly, some of the time I can hardly remember I’ve got three of them!”

“It’s really quite impressive. I don’t know how you keep up with it all. Even just that one day in the Manehattan boutique was so much work...”

“Say, could you be a dear and get some more tea?” Rarity asked.

“I would happily do that, Rarity.”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. BOOM!

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“Don’t worry, I’ve got it!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“Oh well,” Fluttershy said wearily. “At least you saved the teapot.”

“I only wish I could have saved you as well, darling.” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“Never fear, Pinkie’s here!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “Hooooooow’s it going?!”

Rarity facehoofed. “How in Celestia’s name did you even get in here?”

“Nice to see you, Pinkie,” Fluttershy remarked.

“Good to see you too, Flutter Butter!” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “Mmmm, this is delicious.”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“That hardly seems sanitary, dear.”

“Sanitary? I hardly even know ’er!” the pink pony said with a grin. “...Wait, is that how that one goes?”

“I’ve definitely never heard that one before,” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “Well excuuuuse me if you can’t tea my creative genius.”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“Care to stay? I can make some more tea.”

“That sounds absolutely splendiferously terrificamundo!”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.

Tootsie Pop Fountain

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“I’ve been pondering some very big questions lately. Hard not to think of such things, what with everything that’s been going on,” Rarity said.

“I do imagine almost dying would do that to you. Even if that’s never happened to me, specifically.” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “I guess I just wonder sometimes whether perhaps it would have been better if I hadn’t been revived. You and the girls could get on without me, and you know the legacy of a brilliant artist who dies young is always much more majestic than that of some old mare long past her prime.”

“Well, for what it’s worth, I’m glad you’re here. You bring a little sweetness to my life—no, all of our lives.”

“Hmm, alright. Say, speaking of sweetness, do you know how many licks it takes to get to the centre of a Tootsie Pop?” Rarity asked.

“I don’t know—I usually just bite it.”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. SQUARSH!

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“Oh! Seven-hundred eighty and two!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“I guess I thought it would be much less,” Fluttershy said wearily. “What’s the average size of those licks?”

“Well, they’d be the licks of a grown mare, of course. But I’m not sure of the exact area of each lick.” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“You fools!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “Blow Pops are infinitely superior to Tootsie Pops!”

Rarity facehoofed. “And what makes you say that? Perhaps they are paying you to spread this propaganda and lies?”

“Blow Pops aren’t bad, but I don’t think I’d ever choose one over a Tootsie Pop,” Fluttershy remarked.

“Ugh, you two are really unenlightened.” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “And I bet you don’t even know how to lick! This is how you do it, so make sure to take notes.”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“I should have you know that back in the day I licked professionally, and I was quite good at it.”

“Yeah, but only in the minor leagues!” the pink pony said with a grin. “I was a major leaguer, and I did it for like seven years!”

“Then what was your licking name?” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “Lickamina Diane Pie, baby.”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“You really used that?”

“Sure as sugar, Rare-Bear.”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.

Smoke and Mare-ors

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“I feel like I’ve been off the dating scene too long. I just really don’t even know where I’d start,” Rarity said.

“I know how you feel... but I believe in you. Who wouldn’t want that hot piece of ass?” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “Anypony, if my luck is to be trusted. I may be attractive as all get out, but if anypony agrees, they just aren’t showing it.”

“Well I think you’re hot. I’d ask you out myself if I weren’t...”

“Wait, you’re dating somepony?” Rarity asked.

“Welllll... maaaaaaaybe.”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. JORPK!

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“Is it Big Macintosh?!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“If it were, I’d have already told you,” Fluttershy said wearily. “No, it’s actually a psychological construct of my own invention. It’s called a tulpa. Her name is Smokey Eye.”

“A psychological construct of your own invention, huh? Maybe I should try doing that.” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“I heard somepony talking about me!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “Fluttershy! My dear baby girl! I love you so much!”

Rarity facehoofed. “Is this Smokey Eye? How come her coat isn’t, like, smokey-coloured?”

“She was going to be, but my mane fell into my eyes when I was designing her in my mind and I got distracted,” Fluttershy remarked.

“Oh, Fluttershy, you’re such a silly filly. That’s why I love you so much!” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “Ooh, is this punch? Who the hell just sits around on a Saturday morning drinking punch?”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“I happen to think punch is quite delicious.”

“So do I, honey!” the pink pony said with a grin. “I’m just calling you a wacko, wacko.”

“You say this like you aren’t one as well,” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “At least I don’t actually exist.”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“So, how did you two meet? I mean, where did Fluttershy create you?”

“Welllll, it all started back in Cantercún...”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.

P.O. Box 12

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“We should make a podcast,” Rarity said.

“Ooh, I was just thinking the same thing! What do you think it should be about?” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “That’s the hard part, isn’t it? Really, all the most interesting topics have been done to death. We’ve got to think outside of the box.”

“Or... we could always try thinking inside of the box.”

“Oh? Whatever do you mean by that, darling?” Rarity asked.

“Okay, hear me out, but... what if we did box reviews? We could get a bunch of cardboard boxes—I know the Apples have a ton of them—and we could climb into them and talk about which ones are the most comfortable.”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. HRR-KRTCHT!

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“I’d love to talk about boxes!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“Oh, I’m so glad, Rarity,” Fluttershy said wearily. “I was a little afraid that you might not want to... it’s not exactly your usual style, you know.”

“Oh, but I am quite familiar with boxes. I often have to use them when packaging up some items to be sent across Equestria to my other boutiques. Not really the dresses, but more hats and other accoutrements.” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“Boxing is the best!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “I am so freaking ready to punch things!”

Rarity facehoofed. “Not that kind of box, Pinkie. Less Strong Bad hands, more cardboard.”

“I’m quite fond of those big refrigerator ones, they’re really quite cosy,” Fluttershy remarked.

“Yeah, they can be great to punch!.” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “Hey, this is also punch! Weird.”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“That’s tea, darling. What in Celestia’s great green Equestria gave you the idea that it’s punch?”

“Everything’s punch!” the pink pony said with a grin. “At least if you don’t think about it.”

“Uh-huh. Anyway, back to the cardboard boxes,” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “Ugh, but that makes me so card-bored.”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“Pinkie, could you please get out of my house? We have some podcast planning to do, and it would be much easier if you didn’t interrupt us all the time.”

“Only if you make me! Hee-hee!”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.

Hop to It

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“I do always love hearing about your animals,” Rarity said.

“As I love talking about them with you.” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “But it’s been a while since I’ve heard you speak about that Angel, that dear little devil. How has he been?”

“Oh, Angel and I parted ways a couple of months ago.”

“Parted ways? What do you mean?” Rarity asked.

“Yes, he left the company. Really quite a shame, but not much to do about it. I haven’t seen him since then...”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. BOING!

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“Oh my goodness! That was a close one!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“Thanks, Rarity,” Fluttershy said wearily. “Anyway, as I was saying, I haven’t seen him. Honestly, he could have been eaten by timberwolves or something.”

“A fate befitting for that dumb bitch. I never did like him.” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“Aha! It is I!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “Angel, reborn as a pony! Also I’m a girl now!”

Rarity facehoofed. “Oh goodness, you heard everything I said, didn’t you?”

“You really should have been careful,” Fluttershy remarked.

“I heard everything, in spades. But meh, I understand.” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “Oh, this is the good stuff. But yeah, I was pretty sucky, wasn’t I?”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“‘Pretty sucky’ is a bit of an understatement, dear.”

“The absolute worst!” the pink pony said with a grin. “And I’m here to finish what I started.”

“You don’t seriously think I’m going to put up with this, do you?” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “You’re just An-jealous.”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“Do you want to come home with me, Angel?”

“No, I’ve got some murders to do.”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.

You Are What You Eat

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“Fluttershy, I don’t know what to say. It really wasn’t me,” Rarity said.

“You keep saying that, but you really have no proof to the contrary. You’re the most likely suspect until my little baby is found.” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “Innocent until proven guilty.”

“Only in a court of law. As for our friendship...”

“What would I have to do to get in your good graces?” Rarity asked.

“Find my little baby raccoon-pony hybrid child, and bring him back home. Assuming you didn’t eat him, that is.”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. PREEOW!

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“See! I am a good pony! I would never do such a thing!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“Rarity, you know how much I’d like to believe that,” Fluttershy said wearily. “But all signs point to you. Nobody else in this town has such a ravenous appetite for small rodents. And my raccoon husband says he last saw you skulking suspiciously around outside my house.”

“A lady does not skulk. I was simply inspecting the beautiful flowers on display!” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“It was not Rarity—it was I!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “Pinkamena Diane Pie, now with a thirst for blood!”

Rarity facehoofed. “You see, Fluttershy? This really had nothing to do with me.”

“Eh, I’m not a hundred percent convinced. That’s kind of way too convenient of an explanation,” Fluttershy remarked.

“No, really. I thirst for two things: blood, and tea.” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “And I’m almost out of tea.”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“Do you have any proof you did that to my poor child?”

“Do I ever!” the pink pony said with a grin. “Blood and guts all over my bathroom floor. I can take you there now if you like.”

“Why would she need to prove she’s done it, while you’re just assuming I’m guilty by default?” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “You know how easy it is to go from fashion threads to bashin’ heads!”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“That wasn’t even a real joke.”

“Who cares?”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.

Mildly Of-fence-ive

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“I’m thinking about getting into fencing,” Rarity said.

“Oh, like, the sport? With weapons and stuff? My brother used to do that back when we were younger.” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “Oh, Zephyr? I wonder if he would... tutor me...”

“Oh, Rarity, it’s been years since he’s done it, back when we were just kids. I’m sure he doesn’t remember anything.”

“Oh, but I’m sure it would all come back to him once we started, don’t you think?” Rarity asked.

“No, not really. That’s kind of ridiculous”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. HURP!

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“What in the heck was that?!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“Definitely wasn’t me,” Fluttershy said wearily. “Maybe it came from outside.”

“Oh, whatever. What were we talking about again? Oh, yes, fencing...” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“Did someone say fencing?!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “Ahhhhh, stick ’em up! Let’s goooo!”

Rarity facehoofed. “Pinkie, I was just talking about it. I haven’t actually started lessons.”

“I bet you could take her,” Fluttershy remarked.

“Nah, I’m way too good.” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “Got me some mad skillz.”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“Why... why are you drinking the tea from the floor?”

“It’s not tea, it’s super fencing power energy juice!” the pink pony said with a grin. “I’ve got to lap all of it up for the big tournament.”

“I’ve never heard of any tournament,” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “Yeah, it’s a secret right now. You could try asking Mayor Mare about it, but I’ve heard she gets real de-fence-ive.”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“You think I could maybe start training, be ready in time for this tournament?”

“Oh definitely, silly! And I’d be happy to help ya! Though not too much. I still need to win, heehee.”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.

Smooth Like Silk

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“I've always wondered what a cloud tastes like,” Rarity said.

“And didn't you get a chance to find out, what with the Best Young Flyer contest?” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “I could have. But I was so caught up in the moment, you know, and I forgot.”

“That seems like it's kind of on you, then. I mean, I would have reminded you if you asked.”

“When did I ever say it wasn't my own fault?” Rarity asked.

“Fair point.”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. GARBDZH!

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“I'll be damned if I let that break—it's my grandmother's!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“Oh good,” Fluttershy said wearily. “Thanks for that.”

“It wasn't for you, dear; it was for me.” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“Did somepony say something about the taste of clouds?!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “’Cause they're scrumdiddlydumptious!”

Rarity facehoofed. “Aren't you a little late on that?”

“Maybe her surveillance camera has a delay,” Fluttershy remarked.

“Flutter-Butter's on the money.” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “Though this tea isn't. Nowhere as good as a cloud.”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“So then how tastes a cloud, dear?”

“Like cotton candy!” the pink pony said with a grin. “Exactly what you'd think.”

“That seems a little obvious,” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “You're just too up in the clouds to believe me!”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“Wanna see if Twilight will cast that spell again?”

“Why bother with that when I've got a hot air balloon, silly?”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.

More and More

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“No one ever told me life would be this long,” Rarity said.

“I know, isn't it wonderful? So much time to do everything you want. I don't have to worry about running out of time; I can set my own pace.” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “I didn't quite mean it in a good way, darling. I mean, you're right, plenty of time to do things... but it is rather exhausting, isn't it?”

“I guess I've never thought about it that way.”

“Really? Not ever?” Rarity asked.

“No... I just find it so nice and calm.”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. HMMPH.

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“Well this isn't quite calm, now is it?!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“Well, sure,” Fluttershy said wearily. “And I get anxious in these moments... but I remind myself that they pass, eventually. And time goes on.”

“Go on it does. For better or for worse.” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“But not uninterrupted!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “Variety is the spice of life, sillies!”

Rarity facehoofed. “As is scaring your friends?”

“I didn't find it scary,” Fluttershy remarked.

“Scary, but fun!” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “And delicious... like this tea! Mmmmmm...”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“It is good tea, Rarity.”

“And how!” the pink pony said with a grin. “And that's what makes everything worth it!”

“Good tea makes the monotonous drone of life more bearable,” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “As I said: varie-tea is the spice of life.”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“Are you convinced yet, Rarity?”

“Well, not for the tea. But perhaps it's the jokes that make it all worth, my dear Element of Laughter.”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.

Youth Culture Killed My Pop

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“It is a pity that youth is wasted on the young,” Rarity said.

“If it weren’t the young with youth, it wouldn’t be youth.” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “I mean, I suppose that is technically correct. But you know what I mean—the energy, the fervour, the life, the ability to sleep on the floor and not have back problems the next five days.”

“I don’t think that changes my point. If it weren’t the young who had those things, then that wouldn’t be youth.”

“Why do you always have to be so right about everything, dear?” Rarity asked.

“I don’t think I’m always right. But I do have some wisdom. I think it comes with the job of being the oldest of our little group of friends.”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. HOGKT!

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“Never fear, youth is here!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“Perhaps youth isn’t wasted on the young at all,” Fluttershy said wearily. “Us old mares just need to keep around fillies like you so you can save us with your reflexes.”

“Sure, sure. I see what you’re saying.” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“Aha!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “I knew Rarity was secretly a li’l babby!”

Rarity facehoofed. “Pinkie, I’m a year older than you.”

“Don’t worry, Rarity, you’ll always be a li’l babby to me,” Fluttershy remarked.

“Babbies for everyone! Woo-hoo!” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “Except me. I’m only twelve.”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“That’s rather uncouth, darling.”

“Couth! That rhymes with youth!” the pink pony said with a grin. “Forsooth, loose tooth, a bottle of vermouth!”

“If you’re twelve, you really shouldn’t have a bottle of vermouth,” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “Twelve is just twenty-one backwards, silly! And besides, you’re two to one.”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“Are you really on her side here, Fluttershy?”

“Oh, Rarity, don’t make me say it. You know I don’t want to lie to you.”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.

Viola-tor

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“I’m thinking about taking up the cello,” Rarity said.

“Oh, playing instruments is quite nice. Very relaxing.” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “It does seem that way, doesn’t it? Though from what I hear, it’s very difficult. I talked with that cellist Octavia after the Gala that one year, and she warned me off with tales of the years it took to master holding the bow in the frog of her hoof.”

“You could always use your magic, you know.”

“Fluttershy! This is a noble art! Do you really think a mare of such class like moi could be seen in public playing such a magnificent instrument so utterly and horrifyingly wrong?” Rarity asked.

“It’s only wrong if you believe it is.”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. SKWAAA!

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“To tea or not to tea!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“That is the question,” Fluttershy said wearily. “But I think you already answered it, and the right way, too.”

“Hehe, quite.” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“Did I hear something about Gratuitous Sax and Senseless Violins?!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “That’s, like, my favourite Sparks album! ‘When Do I Get to Sing “My Way”’ is a masterpiece!”

Rarity facehoofed. “Pinkie, where in Tartarus did you come from and what in the hay are you even talking about?”

“I like Lil’ Beethoven,” Fluttershy remarked.

“Eh. They shoulda stuck to disco.” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “Mmmmm slurp slurp slurp slurp slurp.”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“Why are you saying ‘slurp’ instead of actually just slurping?”

“It’s what I do, baby!” the pink pony said with a grin. “Non sequiturs are on the house today.”

“Well, okay. But if you’ll excuse us, we’re going to get back to talking about playing the cello,” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “Aw, you don’t mean that, Rarity! You’re just cellous!”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“Oh, hey, how do you feel about Kimono My House?”

“Urgh... this boutique just ain’t big enough for both of us.”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.

Oh God

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“I’ve been thinking a lot, and I’ve come to the conclusion that God loves all her children,” Rarity said.

“Eheh... what’s ‘God’?” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “Surely you must be joking, dear. I know Cloudsdale is full of heathens, but I would have thought you’d have had some education on the subject.”

“Is this another thing where you make fun of me for dropping out of school and not having a strong grasp of cultural knowledge instead of helping me to understand what you’re actually talking about?”

“Could it ever be anything else?” Rarity asked.

“Good point.”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. AHHHHH!

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“Well! I believe in miracles!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“You sexy thing,” Fluttershy said wearily. “Isn’t that a song?”

“We are all songs, in one way or another. Simple words and melodies adrift on the breeze, morphing and repeating and colliding.” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“Well what do we have here?!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “It is I, God!”

Rarity facehoofed. “Do you love all your children?”

“Too bad it’s not Godot,” Fluttershy remarked.

“I Godon’t know what you’re talking about.” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “But I come because I was summoned by this delicious offering!”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“You mean the ground-punch.”

“Yes, quite indeedily sew!” the pink pony said with a grin. “I am a ground-punch connoisseur, and this is some of the best I’ve ever tasted.”

“That’s not punch, it’s tea,” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “It teakes one to know one.”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“I don’t even think I should dignify that one with a response.”

“God damn you mares are so weird.”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.

Abject in the Abstract

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“Ichor sticks shit-like in my throat,” Rarity said.

“At least you’ve ichor to begin with, you know. Not everyone’s so lucky.” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “The truth stings how it stings of course, for me just a pockmark but for you just as death.”

“Death doesn’t hurt once the chemicals kick in.”

“How would you know?” Rarity asked.

“I don’t, it’s just a guess. But that’s what I’ve heard, that’s what ponies these days tend to think.”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. GORMLESS!

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“Your heart!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“Thank you so much for getting that, Rarity,” Fluttershy said wearily. “I’d probably be okay even if my heart did spill out onto the floor, but it would have been a pretty heavy toll on my well-being for a few days.”

“Anything, anything for you, darling.” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“Stick ’em up!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “This is a holdup!”

Rarity facehoofed. “Oh, good grief.”

“What are you holding us up for this time?” Fluttershy remarked.

“Bloody hell, who cares anymore?” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “This is so much better than what I came for, and I came for some good shit!”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“What did you come for, anyway?”

“Oh, you know!” the pink pony said with a grin. “Just my two bestest friends in the whole wide pony world.”

“And which friends would that be?” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch!”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“Where even is Marky Mark living these days?”

“I think somewhere in the north of town, but don’t quote me on that. That’s where his last garage sale was, but he could have moved since then.”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.

Forging On

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“Sometimes it seems like Rainbow Dash might never come back,” Rarity said.

“It’s only been a couple months. She’s doing good work, give her time...” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “I know she is, and I know so many ponies are alive solely because of the good work she’s doing. But still somewhere, deep down... I’m so afraid that, for whatever reason, she’ll be in danger.”

“She’s been in danger before, plenty of times. It might not be her real middle name, but she’s got plenty of experience with handling sticky situations.”

“But even with her skill, won’t her luck run out eventually if she keeps doing this?” Rarity asked.

“...It’s possible, Rarity. I don’t know the statistics. All I can do is trust in Rainbow to bring herself home... and that’s really all you can do, too.”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. HORTZL!

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“I’ve got it!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“Good work, Rarity,” Fluttershy said wearily. “See, that’s probably how Rainbow Dash is handling things—just perfectly, just well enough.”

“But with just one slip-up, one mistake, that would have gone careening off the rails. And my great aunt’s treasured china... would be gone. And, as you know, Rainbow Dash is much more valuable to me than something like this.” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“Did somepony say Rainbow Dash?!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “I just got a letter from that gay skyhorse!”

Rarity facehoofed. “Pinkie, what are you doing in my—wait, she sent you a letter? Recently? She hasn’t sent me anything in more than a week...”

“I... I also received a letter, just yesterday,” Fluttershy remarked.

“Yep, mine came today.” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “Did yours include a secret super-special surprise, Flutter-Butter?”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“What sort of surprise do you mean, darling?”

“If ya didn’t get a letter, I can’t tell ya,” the pink pony said with a grin. “That’s what Dashie said and I don’t go against what Dashie wants, no, no, no.”

“Are you sure?” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “Sure as Sherman’s March to the Sea!”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“Do you think our friend Rainbow doesn’t care for me anymore?”

“Probably!”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.

Don't Call Me Daughter

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“I do hope it starts raining soon—I’m quite sick of the summer, and the fall’s been slow-going to begin,” Rarity said.

“I’m sure it’ll come soon enough. I know I personally am quite excited to see the leaves turn the different colours. I’ve been enlisted by Pinkie to rake the leaves out in front of Sugarcube Corner—which I wouldn’t do, but I know the twins will love playing in the piles.” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “Oh, that does sound adorable. You know, someday, I’d love to have kids of my own.”

“Heh, yeah, I think you’ve mentioned that before. For me, I guess... it’s a nice thought, but I can’t really ever imagine doing that—it seems like a lot of work, and I don’t think I’d be all that good at it.”

“Really? I can’t imagine anypony more prepared—don’t you think all your experience taking care of the animals would help you?” Rarity asked.

“Hmm, I’m not so sure it translates directly like that.”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. PPPPPPOP...

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“I’ve saved the dear from certain doom!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“See, that’s exactly what I mean,” Fluttershy said wearily. “Imagine that were my poor child, and I sent her spiralling down to near-death... I’m too clumsy, too careless.”

“Oh, nonsense. Absolutely ridiculous nonsense, I say.” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“I agree!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “I can absolutely guarantee that Fluttershy is a terrific mom!”

Rarity facehoofed. “And how would you know that? Also, who are you?”

“I... think she might be my daughter...” Fluttershy remarked.

“You’re right on the money, Mom.” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “Though jeez, it’s so weird to see you this young. You can’t be much older than me, huh?”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“How... how did you get here, uhm, sweetie?”

“Time travel!” the pink pony said with a grin. “And it’s some invention of Auntie Twilight’s, I don’t really know how it works but it’s magic and stuff.”

“Why would she send you back?” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “To butt into this conversation to make sure Mom figures out she can take care of kids so that I don’t fizzle out of existence!”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“So if I decide I definitely don’t want to have kids, you’ll just... disappear?”

“Yeah, that’s pretty much exactly what will ha—”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.

Mostly Sprite

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“Soooo... you know what I’m thinking?” Rarity said.

“What are you thinking, Rarity?” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “Oh, I was hoping you knew. I don’t know either, honestly. I wish I did.”

“Something about the upcoming winter, I’m sure? Do you have your winter fashions planned out?”

“Do you know what all your animals will be doing with regards to hibernation?” Rarity asked.

“I do, in fact... but hold on, let me get more tea. I can explain, though.”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. PORDGE!!

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“You did it, girl, you did it!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“I guess I can do something after all,” Fluttershy said wearily. “Who knew?”

“I did, my darling.” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“But what is knowage?!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “Don’t tell me you can definitively say what it is to know!”

Rarity facehoofed. “Pinkie, what the h—?”

“Tartarus. She means Tartarus,” Fluttershy remarked.

“It’s fine either way, I really don’t mind.” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “The thirst for knowledge will never be sated, you know? That’s just how it goes.”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“I’m not so sure about that, darling—you definitely can learn enough.”

“Learn enough... ha!” the pink pony said with a grin. “There’s so much out there!”

“Sure, but not all of it could possibly interest you,” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “Interest? I hardly know ’est!”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“Seriously, that one again?”

“You know me—I never fail to disappoint!”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.

Marble Madness!!

The sun shone brightly through the window, a bright warm blanket of light draped over the table in the kitchen of Carousel Boutique. To one side sat the alabaster unicorn who lived there; on the other side, the buttercream pegasus who was her best friend. As they sat, they sipped from their cups.

“You know, Fluttershy, I’ve always been quite impressed that you just go through your life with a mouthful of marbles all of the time. I know I sure couldn’t do it,” Rarity said.

“Yeah, I mean, not even in the metaphorical sense. I truly am gargling dozens of glass balls at any given moment, though of course they’re not always the same ones. I like to change them up from time to time.” Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity let out a little sigh. “I didn’t know that bit, dear. What do you do with the old ones when you’re done with them? Throw them out?”

“Some girls spit, but I swallow.”

“And it doesn’t hurt or anything?” Rarity asked.

“It gives me some intestinal pain, but it’s pretty much worth it basically all the time.”

Fluttershy scooted her chair out from the table and stood up, trotting over to the kitchen counter. From the stovetop, she picked up a teapot—an ornate, ancient thing—and started to walk back to the table with the thing between her teeth.

Suddenly, there was a very loud noise. HARGL-BARGL-GARGLE!!!

Fluttershy jumped, startled, dropping the teapot in the process. Time seemed to slow down as the antique china spiralled towards the ground, and—

“Don’t lose your marbles, it’s alright!” Rarity exclaimed. Fluttershy opened her eyes—which had instinctively snapped shut—to see that, miraculously, the teapot hadn’t fallen to the ground and shattered; it was suspended aloft by a shimmering blue magical aura. Yet even though the teapot was saved, a pool of the liquid had spilled onto the floor, soaking Fluttershy’s hooves.

“Oh, thank the goodness and such,” Fluttershy said wearily. “I would have hated to have spilled any of my marbles, my precious, precious marbles.”

“Nothing to fear, you wild butter-yellow pegasus, you. Your marbles are safe.” Rarity set the teapot down on the table, and then picked up a cloth rag from the counter in her magic. She moved as if to wipe up the liquid, but—

“Safe from all but the one and only world class marble thief!” another voice exclaimed. The cabinet beneath the kitchen counter burst open and a smiling pink pony popped out, her mane floofing up as she stood up. “Me! And I learned from the best!”

Rarity facehoofed. “Pinkie, your sister doesn’t count as a marble thief.”

“Oh, but she does. That dastardly filly once stole a whole hoofful, straight from between my teeth. It was quite disgusting,” Fluttershy remarked.

“And an inspiration to us all.” The pink pony leapt over to the puddle on the ground, and started licking. “At least the ones of us paying attention, you know?”

Rarity grimaced; Fluttershy just stared.

“So, if you’re going to steal Fluttershy’s marbles, why haven’t you?”

“I’m working on it!” the pink pony said with a grin. “Just gotta do some slurps.”

“Slurps,” Rarity said, skeptical.

The pink one smirked. “Look... if anything, since this is so fucking insane, anyway... haven’t your marbles already been lost?”

A beat. Then, all three of them laughed, uproariously.

“No, I still have all of my marbles in my mouth right here, and I’m just sitting here gargling them. It’s pretty dope.”

“You’re pretty dope, you son of a gun.”

And, much as the sun kept shining on down through the window of the Boutique, life went on.