It was pure madness and horror in the city.
Ponies ran around in a panic, desperately trying to stop the horrible creatures from eating literally every available food source, their sheer numbers increasing with every meal. Even an attempt at magic didn’t work, only making them eat NON-edible things, including entire buildings.
Just as things seemed at their worst...it got much, much worse. As the creatures numbers multiplied, soon the sun itself was blotted by their sheer numbers and then...something even worse was formed.
The only course was to run as the entire city was destroyed.
An owl hooted. Pinkamena got up from her bed and onto her hooves. She looked over at her ‘assistant’, a large owl named Owlowicious. She trotted to a small cupboard, opened it and grabbed a small plate to fill it with grains and gave it to the owl, who then proceeded to begin eating his meal. Pinkamena nodded in affirmation at the sight before turning, pulling a pair of large leather bags and placing them onto her back before trotting outside, locking the door behind her as she began the long, long trek down to Ponyville from the mountains near which her farm was situated.
After possible a half hour or even an hour’s worth of walking, she didn’t really pay much attention to the time the trip took, Pinkamena entered the streets of the town proper, a yellow Pegasus flying close and waving cheerfully.
“Hi Pinkie Pie!” Fluttershy greeted as she flew in close with a wide smile.
Pinkamena sighed and began to sing.
“My name’s not Pinkie Pie
And I would like to say
GO AWAY!”
She shouted this as she kicked Fluttershy aside, her face deadpan and neutral as ponies around her grew a little more nervous and stepped aside.
“I don’t care about your smiles
It’s way too busy today
it doesn’t matter anyhow
If you’re sad or blue
It’s none of my business
Pinkamena’s got some other stuff to do
Because I don’t care how much you smile-smile-smile
No I don’t
I just wanna be left alone and not be bothered
So why can’t you all just leave me alone-lone-lone
Because I don’t need these friends of mine”
She trotted along the street, not even bothering to look at anypony as she went along, Fluttershy giggling and following along after her while adding to the song herself
“OH come on Pinkie
I’d love to see you beam!
The corners of your mouth
turned up
would be such a scene!
Don’t be so worried
No need to make that frown
If you just let you feel the joy
Your view will turn upside down!”
Pinkamena rolled her eyes, kicking a rock at the Pegasus as she turned a corner, Fluttershy gliding around it with a giggle.
“Oh just grow-up-up-up
You pinhead
Not all of us can be happy
being so carefree like you
Just leave me alone-lone-lone
I’m not somepony who cheers.”
He grunted, lowering her head as she looked around herself, singing a little quieter to herself.
“Sure, somedays its dark and lonely
and a bit sad
But honestly I’m better off this way
Who needs to be happy?
MY life is worthwhile
I have a job I really do enjoy
After all what more do I need to smile?
I make a lot of money
And I get live free
I don’t need to smile
Or some friends
SO what else do I need?
Because I’m utterly fine-fine-fine
by myself
So tell me what more can say
To make you see?
That it’s true
It would make me happy
If you’d all just. Go. A. Way.
And leave me to my day.”
Fluttershy was about to add more to the song as she caught up to Pinkamena as the earth pony walked into the middle of the market square, only for PInkamena to hold up a hoof and step into the post office, from the window of which hung a sign saying ‘no singing, signing or singeing’.
Fluttershy pouted, folding her hooves. “Poopie.”
Pinkamena trotted towards the shopkeeper, placing one of the large bags she was carrying onto the counter, letting several gemstones and metal ingots spill out. “These are too be delivered to the Royal Guard Blacksmith in Canterlot.” Pinkamena procedded to toss a handful of bits onto the counter.
The grey, blonde maned mare at the counter blinked, one of her eyes staring at the heavy load while the other eye gazed at the earth pony before her. “Well, um, thanks Miss Pinkie...I’ll count up those bits to make sure you payed the right amount for the delivery fee.”
“It’s Pinkamena. And you’ll find that I had given you the correct amount.”
The grey mare smiled softly, looking a little intimidated. “W-well I bet you got some other plans for today? Going shopping?”
“No. I have some trinkets and baubles made from some of my other harvest for the ponies in town to buy. This was just my first stop because this was a more important job paid for in advance.” She turned, trotting off without even a farewell.
“S-see you soon!” The postal worker called out as PInkamena left with a slam of the door.
PInkamena sighed in annoyance, wishing ponies would just let her get on with business instead of wasting her time. She looked around, thankful that Fluttershy had finally gotten bored and flew off elsewhere as she began to trot her way towards the middle of the marketplace where she could set up a stall and get to work. Her stall was a simple box of wood she sat behind, a decently sized sign atop reading ‘metal, gems, trinkets, all priced however I feel like it’. Pinkamena leaned against the counter, her expression blank and inscrutable as always. Hopefully she’ll get an actual customer someday, and once again she found herself cursing the stupidity of the ponies of Ponyville.
Naturally while some ponies gazed at her in curiosity, pretty much everypony trotted from her and gave her a wide berth, put off by her glum demeanour and grumpy attitude to others. Pinkamena didn’t care, sooner or later somepony would come to her and buy from her. She just had to wait it out.
As she sat there for several minutes, the mare’s ears pricked at a sound. She hesitated from referring to it as music as it was more a cacophony of whoopee cushions, rooster calls, trumpets and an assortment of ridiculous, not to mention irritating sounds. The noise grew louder as a large wagon trundled into town, pulled by a grinning stallion with a lightly brownish coat and curly grey mane and muttonchops, his cutie mark a pickaxe. As the curious ponies in the town looked at the newcomer, the strange stallion grinned and ran to stand at the side of his very large caravan.
“Well hi there folks! You look like a town in need of some FUN and LAUGHTER, and I am willing to provide! MY name is Iggy Rock and I am a seller of practical jokes, gags, toys and whatever else will put a smile on somepony’s face! I sure am glad to be able to visit you all and give you all a good time!”
The ponies in the street blinked and looked at each other, trotting towards the caravan as they were drawn by the visitor.
Pinkamena’s hooves clenched the top of her stall counter tightly as she glared angrily at the stallion who proceeded to step into his caravan to pull out supplies and begin setting up a large tent and a sign that said ‘Iggy’s Smile Emporium’. PInkamena knew this stallion very well, and her heart burned with rage at the sheer GALL he had coming here before her.
Her father was here. NOW, of all times, ruining everything and making a fool of himself as usual.
PInkamena growled and started to take down her stall, putting the pieces back into her bag as Rarity walked over in concern.
“Are...are you okay, Pinkamena? You...don’t usually close down your shop this early...”
“I’m fine.” Pinkamena growled, pointedly looking away from the other mare and from the spectacle just a few feet from her. “I just need time to myself, away from that EYESORE.”
Before Rarity could ask for clarification as to the meaning of those words, Pinkamena tossed her bag on her back and trotted off in a huff.
Author's Note
My inclusion of Pinkie's song here is to give a comparison between her canon personality and how she acts here, as I thought it would be a neat way of doing it. as always, I'm not a songwriter so my altered lyrics are liekly very clunky and not very good.
