Phoenix Wright decided to be in his house one day. But, he was sad because he was poor and ugly, because he didn't have a lot of money.
"Shit" said Phoenix.
Phoenix was so tired of being living in Ace Attorney world which is the world he lives in, he was tired of defending idiots and buying Burgers for Maya and having to fight Manfred von Karma's ghost. He decided, finally day, he was gonna take a VACATION.
Phoenix grabbed his suitcase and got all his vacation things: His clothes, his 70 matching wigs, his lawyer gun, and his evidence. Wright got his stuff and left the house but don't worry he put a note on the door that said "Im going to the place that I don't know where I'm going yet". Phoenix got on his bike because he doesn't have a driver license and he drove to a mountain with snow in it, it was called Mount Ass.
When he got there he climbed to the top of the mountain and he relaxed with a cup of hot chocolate but it was cold outside so it made the hot chocolate cold so it was actually cold chocolate. He drank it really fast and relaxed in the sun which made the hot chocolate hot again.
"I love relaxing chocolate," said Phoenix but he was disturbied by something.
"What the fuck is that noise," said Phoenix. Suddenly the ground RUMBIED and a big CRACK opened in the ground!
"What the fuck is that noise," said Phoenix. He looked in the crack but then his FACE got hit by a ton of RAINBOWS and shit so he went uncoscious.
"Fuck I don't like being unconscious" said Phoenix.
~ LATER TIME ~
Phoenix woke up in grass. He lookd up and saw he was inside a room of a castle, and there were walls and a floor and a ceiling and windows and also a castle.
"Fuck how did I get in Edgeworths house" said Phoenix but then he stoped when he looked in the mirror, because they was something different about him.
HE WASNT A PONY! Which was actually normal because Phoenix Wirght is a human.
"Oh that's good" said Phoenix "If I was a pony that would be really weird. Its a good thing ponies arent real" he said and he looked out the window and there are ponies.
"Oh fuck," said Phoenix "Never mind I guess they are real." So he went out the door of his room and went around the castle for a long time so long that his legs got tired so he start walking on his arms instead.
Phoenix eventually got to throne room, where was a big White Pony called Princess Celestia.
"What the fuck" said Phoenix "You are a bigbig pony, why you so big?"
"Phoenix Wright you met me before remember?"
"WHAT WHEN?"
"In Phoenix Wright Turnabout Portal by jakkid166 you appeared here with Gumshoe in the first chapter. Its a good story you should read it."
"Oh shit you're right," said Phoenix. "Okay but why am I here again? I dident even go into a portal."
"Because we need yoru help," said Celestia "We need you to defend a pony."
"FUCK" said Phoenix "I came to vacation so I wouldent have to work!"
"Yeah well if you don't defend them then you'll get convicted too because thats how the law works in Equestria."
"Oh okay." said Phoenix. "But who am I defending?"
"I dont know the crime hasnt happened yet." said Celestia "Just stay in Equestria until it happens"
"Shit." said the Phoenix. "Okay fine." So he went out the doors and went to Ponyville to do some stuff.
Phoenix got on the train to Ponyville and he sat down and I was also on the train.
"Oh hi Detective Jakkid166 the greatest detective in the world what are you doing here?" said Phoenix.
"I am here to investigate the crime," said me.
"What crime," said Phoenix.
"That crime." I said and I pointed to the dead pony that was on the floor in the car with us.
"Oh shit," said Phoenix. "You're right, why is it dead?"
"I don't know I just got here," said me and I used my magnifying glass to look at the pony.
"What can you find out?" said Phoenix
"The pony is dead," said me.
"Shit, then who killed it?"
"I dont know, maybe it was YOU!" I said and I handcuffed phoenix except I also handcuffed him to the dead pony on accident.
"WHAT?" said Phoenix. "How cold I have done it I just got here?"
"Oh shit youre right," said me and I uncuffed him. "Okay well im gonna go accuse some pony of the murder. Then you will defend them in court and find the TRUTH"
"But isn't it your job to find out what happened?"
"Yea but Detective Jakkid166 is a loose cannon," I said and I jumped out the window.
So Phoenix was annoyed cause he had to share his car with a dead pony. When the train stopped he jumped out the door and called the police with his cell phone.
"Hello this is Equestria police how can I help you?"
"THE PONY IS DEAD, I need to know who did it so I can defend them."
"Okay it the person accused was called Applejack, she has a hat and apples."
"Okay thank you and also can you deliver some food to the courtroom for when I get there?"
"Sure"
~ IN THE COURT HOUSE ~
"Are you sure you can defend me Phoenix Wright" said Twilight.
"Don't worry Twilight I've defended tons of people, I even have a award for defending the whole earth from a giant robot. Ill be fine and also good."
"Okay thank you" said Twilight but she was still scared because she didn't know Phoenix and he hadn't never defended people in Equestria before so he was new to Equestria law.
When they went in the court room Phoenix went and stood at the defense bench but there wasnt a prosecutor there for some reason.
"Oh Hi Phoenix Wright," said the Judge who was also there for some reason. "Where is the prosecutor?" He said but then the prosecutor wasn't missing anymore, because they were in the courtroom. And the prosecutor was DISCORD!
"Oh shit its that person who I don't know who you are!" said Phoenix. "Who are you?"
"I am Discord, the mater of chaos," said Discord. "I became a prosecutor so I can bring CHAOS LAW into Equestria!"
"Chaos law? But that has only been taught down for five generations by only the most exclusive attorneys," said Phoenix who was looking at Discord with his eyes. "You cannot learn it by being a prosecutor!"
"Well see about that," said Discord. "I call my first whiteness to the stand."
TO BE CONTINUED
"Yeah well Dick Cord who is your witness then you say?" said Phoenix who was exercising his objection arm to prepare for objections.
"I call Detective jakkid166 to the stand," said Discord. And then I was on the witness stand and I was there.
"Give us you name and your job that you do," said Discord but I dident respond to what he saying for some reason.
"Wtf the fuck" said Phoenix and he went over to me and I was laying on the ground. "Wait a minute hes DEAD!"
"WHat?!"!!" said the Judge "How the fuck did that happen"
"Discord must have been the MURDERED HIM!" said Phoenix and he sat down on the floor ground and cried out of his eyes and nose. "Nooooo Detective jakkid166 whyy???? You were ALWAYS the greatest detective even before you was born on Christmas day december 25th which actually is your birthday which is really weird."
"But hes my witness why would I kill him you fucking idiot," said Discord "Cleerly you were the one who did it."
"LIAR LIAR PANTS ON FIRE!" SCREAMED Phoenix. "It mustve been someone else who isnt in the courtroom!"
"But who could that be" said the Judge who was alive.
Phoenix looke dup at the sky "It had to have been.... the TRUE MURDERER!"
_ MEANWHILE TIME_
Twilight sparkle was walking in the house of Ponyville with Spike who was also there with her cause they was gone out grocery shopping to buy bread and also some food like apples and steak so they can make apple and steak pie except ponies cant eat steak so it was actualy fake steak made from began beans.
"Okay spike now we have to go home so we can eat dinner or lunch" said Twilight "Or breakfast if it was morning.But its not so its actually lunch."
But then Phoenix ran over to the in front of Twilight. "TWILIGHT youll never guess what happened!" He said a lot.
"What is it hurry up already I need to go eat," said Twilight.
"Detective jakkid166 has got killed on!" said Wright "We gotta go find the murderer."
"Oh shit," said Twilight "Okay lets go"
so Phoenix grabbed a wheelchair and sat in it and Twilight pushe him into town. They went around lookin for potential suspects and stuff but there wasnt only anyone that looked like a bad guy except for Discord and Lord Tirek but they dont count.
"Wait a minute" said phoenix "Look its EDGEWORTH GHOST!" he said and he pointed at edgeworth objectionly and Edgeworth ghost was sitting on a park bench feeding ghost birds with ghost bird seeds.
Phoenix got outta he wheel chair and went to Edgeworth "Hey edgeghost how are you doing after you died after I killed you on accident that time long ago?"
"Oh hello Phoenix my love," said Edgeworth "Im doing good I'm only dead and stuff."
"Stop callng me that" said Wright "Anyway we need your HELP TO SOLVE THE MURDER!"
"Okay" said Edgeworth "Its time for Ace Attorney Investigations."
And cause Edgeworth is in the Ace Attorney INvestigations games that means he has the power of walking and investigating. But they were hungry first so they went to sugargube corner to eat some lunch.
Phoenix went in and went to the counter and Pinkie Pie was there, who was baking cupcakes in the cash register. "Oh hi Phoenix Wright what do you want?" she said and she was rocking out to heavy metal music cause it was playing on the radio.
"Hmmm lets see I think ill have some EVIDENCE" said Phoenix. "Aha thats right you see I actually came here to order evidence from you instead of food."
"Oh ok" said Pinkie and she served Phoenix some evidence and it costed him 500 dollars.
"What the fuck" said Phoenix "Why is it so expensive"
"And then phoenix paid for the food and sit down." said Pinkie.
Phoenix looked at the evidence because it was in a briefcase. "Wait a minute" he said "This evidence is a BLUE CLOTH!" said him. "That must mean the murderer wears BLUE CLOTHES!"
"But you wear blue clothes" said Twilight.
"Ah but thats also another the not the most thing about this cloth," said Phoenix "This is GHOST CLOTH!"
"What the fuck" said Edgeworth "What does that mean?"
"Who do we know thats both a ghost and a bad guy" said Phoenix
"Manfred von KARMA!" said Edgeworth.
and THEN all of a sudden the sky got blue and dark and the clouds came in and it was dark and the sky was dark and everything was dark and the lights went out in sugarcube corner and it was dark in there. But then all the candles lighted up and a figure appear in the middle of them....
it was MANFRED VON KRMA
"Hahaha I see you have discovered my plans" said Manfred "Long time no pee phoenix."
"Manfred von fuck shit did you kill the pony?" said Phoenix.
"I cant tell you that" said Manfred and he pulled out a g host gun and SHOT EDGEWORTH.
"What the fuck" said Phoenix and Edgeworth died but since he was a ghost when he died already that means he just came back to life as a living person.
"Dammit I liked being dead," said Edgeworth "Now Im hungry."
"But why did you bring back Edgeworth to life?" said Rarity
"Because I cant let him use his ghost powers to stop me. And because Im a ghost now there is NO way for you to arrest me!" He spacked loudy. "Now you will have to use the evidence to find the true killer who isnt me."
"Oh really?" said Phoenix "If you dident kill jakkid166 then who did"
"I dont know" said von Karma "I cant tell you cause that would shit my plans. You gotta SOLVE THE MYSTERY YOUSELF" said Manfred and he disappeared away into smoke and fash.
"Damn." said Phoenix "Okay lets what the fuck."
