There are a lot of things that I hate in this world and Earth, stairs is one of them. The other is a test. Test, test, test. The thing that thoroughly thrills Twilight, tests. Ugh, I had just about enough of that word before I even MET Twilight, we need to run another test, we need to test this, we need to test that! I swear to the ancient lords of all that is metal I wish the word test was thrown out of the dictionary and beat down like the printer in Office Space. I'm sick of that word, test, in fact I'm going to stop writing it, it shall now be known as quiz, that's much better, it has a q and a z in it.

That being said, let's quit my hang up about a synonym for quiz and get back to the task at hand, which means. I'm in the lab watching Twilight, we had showered and she had restrained herself so that she didn't try to do anything untoward, I explained to her that I wasn't good at sex in the shower. She understood, and she was...quizzing my DNA again, she was done up in her sciencey outfit again while I sat in a chair with my legs crossed to keep myself from popping a boner. I absolutely love the sexy nurse routine, and Twilight's a sexy scientist so that's close enough to get me excited. She had safety goggles on and was looking through a microscope while humming to herself, she then moved on to a rudimentary mass spectrometer. Twilight did a few more things and then destroyed the DNA samples, as I requested the last time I was in the lab. Every time I come here I always want to say either 'to the lab' or call it the 'laboratory' like Dexter, alas no one would understand my witticisms, maybe Discord, but he wasn't here.

Twilight looked at me, "Good news! From what I've discovered I can make you something to cancel out your anti-magic aura. Therefore I can make you grow, the bad news is concerning your health. It wouldn't be healthy for such a drastic change immediately, so we'll have to do it gradually and by my calculations it would take a year or so for you to get used to your new size, also there's the deal with spinal compression and making sure you don't cripple yourself while we do this."

"Yeah, anything over 7 feet tall and we may have some problems." I said, "Whatever makes me taller, I'm willing to put in the work."

"You'll have to increase your protein intake, which means that you'll have to eat more meat. I'm willing to order some...steaks from the griffon empire, meat has become a little known export of theirs since they've started to rebuild their kingdom."

I had heard of that from Pinkie and Rainbow, apparently they needed a nudge in the right direction, I'm glad I didn't go. I probably would've murdered someone for trying to steal my money from me, I work hard for my things. I'm also a poor bastard but that's besides the fact, so I'll need to change my diet. "So what else would I need to do?"

"Build more muscle." Twilight said and I looked at her. "Oh, right your metabolism. Then you'll need to go to the gym regularly. Your '13 weeks of hell' works for you, but more regularity would help with the adjustment."

"I suppose I can do that." I nodded. "But you have to do it alongside me." I got up and poked her belly. "Because your diet of chips and soda late at night while studying has put an extra layer of fat in the wrong places."

"Celestia said it would go to my rear..." Twilight looked at her stomach.

"I'm not body shaming you Twily, I'm just saying that you could exercise a bit more." I smiled.

"Hmm, even Rarity goes to the gym. She says sweaty and beauty ends with a ty and you'll say thank you when you're done."

"I told her that, after she downed several pints of ice cream over a date that went in the wrong direction fast." I said, "I told her about yoga and pilates, the rest was history."

"Yoga?" Twilight asked.

"It's a more graceful way to exercise, talk to Rarity about it. She knows more." I said, "Exercise and you'll order more meat for me, I got a question. How come you haven't ordered meat for Spike?"

"He...doesn't want to be ostracized for it...hence why he's as tall as you are."

"You want me to talk to him?" I asked.

"If you would please? You're the only other non pony here and he looks up to you more than you would know." She said.

"Alright, I'll talk to him." I got up and then realized my mistake, I still had a blatant erection.

Twilight looked at me and then looked away, "Um, Mickey. You're...um...showing..."

"Oh shit!" I covered my pants with my hand. "Try to scrub that from your memory."

"It'll be hard not to." Twilight blushed.

I smirked and rolled my eyes, I then walked up the stairs and spotted Spike reshelving some books whilst he was upon a ladder. "Need a hand?" I offered.

"Uh, no thanks this is the last one." Spike shot down my offer politely.

"Okay, well Twilight actually wanted me to talk to you for a bit. When you got the time."

"I've got some time right now." Spike slid down off the ladder.

"Alright then, let's take a walk." I motioned to the outside door, Spike decided to walk ahead and I followed him.

"So what did you want to talk about?" Spike asked as I took the lead and walked only slightly ahead of him.

"I talked to Twilight about some personal things, and in doing so it revealed that you aren't eating what you're supposed to be eating."

"I don't know what you're talking about." Spike lied.

"Spike, you can't bullshit a bullshitter, it's just not possible. You aren't eating meat, and while you want to stick to your guns. That's very commendable, but at this point you're risking your health. Do you really want to stay this height, forever?" I asked him.

"No." Spike scratched the back of his head, "I just don't want ponies to think that I'm a monster."

"If the people in your life are so shallow to think that, then maybe you need to reassess who you need to include in your life." I patted him on the back.

"What about Rarity?" Spike asked.

"Just tell her, if she really loves you. She'll accept it." I assured him.

"Thanks Mick." Spike smiled. "I've got a question for you, do you ever have trouble...fitting into your place in the world?"

"Are you asking for you, or for a 'friend'." I put air quotes around the word friend.

"I'm asking for me, for a long time and even before I started to date Rarity I felt like, well the girls didn't respect me. I mean sure they've included me occasionally and we even went into one of my comic books, and they told the villian that I was a part of them, but then it went back to the same old status quo the next day. It, it really hurts." Spike said.

"So the girls are making you feel insecure and you have no self esteem." I asked and Spike just nodded.

"And they've never noticed this, even though they're the pedigree of friendship?" I asked and Spike nodded once again, "Okay that pisses me off."

"What should I do?" Spike asked.

I thought about it, scratching my beard, "You know what?" I looked at him. "I've never been to the Crystal Empire, aren't you regarded as a hero there?"

"Yeah..." Spike was confused, "I don't get what this has to do anything."

"We're going on vacation, just you and me. Two weeks away from the girls, show them how much they need you give them time to reflect." I stated.

"What will Twilight say?" Spike asked.

"Fuck Twilight, you deserve some time off." I said, "You've been busting your ass for how many years now?"

"Since I was hatched, practically." Spike stated.

"Spike, you NEED this. The conditions you've been treated have been borderline on slavery, that's not right. I figure it's time for you to learn a trade or go on a fucking vacation." I stated, "Either way, we're leaving tonight."

"Really?" Spike asked.

"What's life without being a little spontaneous?" I rhetorically asked.

"Okay." Spike half-heartedly said, so I slapped him upside the head. "HEY! WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!"

"You need to stop people from slapping and pushing you around. Take charge of your life man!" I shouted at him.

Spike looked down and when he looked back at me he had a look of determination in his eyes. "Thanks Mick, I think I needed that."

"Alright, then what are you waiting for? Go get your shit." I said as I started to take off towards my house. I had gotten my clothes packed and informed Applejack and Mac of my intentions, and they saw no problem with it, winter was always a slow season for them, it's an apple farm what did you expect? They usually cut down the trees that don't grow anymore apples and it's usually me who does it. I met Spike at the train station and we got our tickets, grabbed our seats, and left for the crystal empire, I smiled because Spike and I rarely had time to bond I had always liked the guy as well he's always been friendly with me so I had a few questions. "Hey, Spike."

"Yeah?"

"Do you mind me dating Twilight and the other girls? I know that we don't really talk as much and I actually never talked about it."

"Actually out of everypony that lives in Ponyville, you're the one that I had hoped that would date the girls the most." Spiked admitted.

"Why?" I asked.

"Because you're a healthy dose of reality, you're realistic and sometimes the girls need an anchor to ground them in reality. Heavens knows that I've done all I can but all they do is see me as a joke, and that's on the best of days." Spike sighed.

I reached up and put my hand on his shoulder. "I'm going to try and help you with that. Okay?"

"I appreciate that Mick." Spike smiled.

"So what do you like to do in your spare time?" I asked Spike.

"I like to read comic books." Spike answered.

"Oh really? Okay, you know us humans have comic books."

"Really?!" Spike was excited.

"Oh yeah! But to pop culture, there are two giants of the comic book industry. They're also making movies about these comics, although one comic company is doing much better in that regard."

"Tell me!" Spike was grinning at this point."

"Alright, it starts at the ass end of World War II."

Author's Note

I commissioned some artwork for both my stories, also I'm turning 20 on saturday! Oh god I'm no longer going to be a teenager.