Randy Orton vs. Gilda the Griffon

by acknapp18

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Yona, Alternate Universe, Human, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Gilda, Profanity, Random
Length: 1133

After landing a match-winning RKO, Randy Orton is suddenly transported to Equestria to solve a bullying problem

Gilda the Griffon has long been able to get away with bullying everypony in Equestria. But today, that's gonna change... outta nowhere!

Published 2018-05-31 11:30:07 UTC
Last updated 2018-05-31 11:30:07 UTC

Arrival

"And now, Randy Orton is gonna try to hit Styles with a DDT!", said Jim Ross, the lead commentator for the WWE Network. Randy jumped up on top of Styles, and, twisting his body, landed a modified powerbomb RKO.

"OH! OH MY GOODNESS!!! AN RKO!!! OUTTA NOWHERE!!", Ross and his assistant, Jerry Lawler, screamed. Randy now jumped on top of Styles, landing a DDT and pinning him for 3 seconds.

Or at least he thought it was.

Styles had somehow been able to kick out from under Randy before grabbing Randy and finishing him with his finisher, the Styles Clash, slamming into the mat.

"OH, NO!!", shouted Ross. "Styles just hit Orton with the Clash, and Orton is down! He might lose this match!".

"How on Earth did Styles recover that quickly?!", asked Lawler, who was stunned that Orton was about to lose.

"The countdown for Orton is on right now! It's gonna be a huge upset for Styles!", screamed Ross.

Suddenly, Jinder Mahal came flying into the ring, further finishing Orton with his finisher, the Khallas!

"Oh, Jinder Mahal's in the ring! He came outta nowhere!", shouted Lawler. "And now he and Styles are gonna finish off Orton for good!".

Mahal and Styles combined their finishers into a move they called the Cobra Clash!

Unfortunately, when they executed it, Randy was sent through a worm hole in the middle of the mat that had suddenly appeared!

"Whoa! What the hell was that?!", shouted Ross, not knowing what had happened to Orton.

"He's gone! Randy Orton gone! I can't believe this!", said Lawler.

"Where did he go?!", screamed Ross.

WATCH OUT WATCH OUT WATCH OUT!!!

Randy Orton. A name so familiar with wrestling, but not with Equestria. Randy himself had landed there due to a magical mishap in his world. Now all he had to do was get back home in time for that night's Raw. But first, he had to find his way around the peaceful land without causing any trouble.

"So, Randy,", asked Rainbow, the two of them sitting at a small table at a restaurant. "What's your job?".

"Uh, well..", said Randy nervously. He had never spoken to a talking pony before, so he wasn't sure what to say. "I, uh... I compete in this, uh, semi-professional wrestling league called SmackDown.".

"Really?", asked Rainbow excitedly. "What kind of stuff do you do?".

"Uh, well,", said Randy. "Each wrestler has their own particular move set that they use during each match, and they also have match-winning moves called finishers. My finisher is called the RKO, which is my own personal move AND finisher. Nobody else uses it."

"How does it work?!", squeed Rainbow.

"So what I do", said Randy, acting it out with his hands, "is I grab my opponent's neck facing backwards from them, lift 'em up, and then slam 'em down facefirst on the mat. It looks pretty violent for a newbie to WWE, but it's perfectly safe."

"AHHHH!!", screamed Rainbow. "That sounds amazing!!".

"Ah, thank you", said Randy, rubbing his ear from the noise.

Randy got up with Rainbow and left the restaurant. Suddenly, the two of them heard shouting from Sugarcube Corner.

"What do ya think that is?", asked Randy, out of curiosity.

"I don't know", said Rainbow. "Let's go check it out".

What Kind of World Has Talkin' Horses?!

Randy Orton groaned and sat up in a field just outside of Ponyville. He wondered what kind of world looked cartoonish, as if he were in a little girl's dream. Suddenly, he heard a growling sound coming from behind him. He turned around and saw a giant wolf made out of of wood charging at him.

Wolves made outta solid wood?! thought Orton. What kind of bullshit is that? No place on Earth could have wolves like that, and yet, here was a big one charging right at him. Randy jumped up on top top of the wolf, stunning it with a DDT. He then turned around, twisting his body into the RKO position, and RKO'd the wolf coming at him.

Unfortunately, the wolf reformed, reassembling itself.

Oh, you want some more, huh? chuckled Randy. You're about to get it!

This time, Randy jumped up and applied an RKO he had previously used on Seth Rollins, completely destroying the wolf. Randy scattered the remains so it wouldn't reform again.

There. said Randy. Maybe next time you won't think about messin' with the Viper!

Suddenly, a high-pitched scream wave hit Randy in the face.

"That was SO AWESOME!!!".

Randy immediately fainted.

RKO!!!

Randy and Rainbow Dash now knew each other so well that they had formulated a plan to take down whoever was causing the commotion. In fact, Randy had taught Rainbow his signature phrase, "It only takes one.. outta nowhere!".

"Man, Gilda's really letting that yak have it.", said Randy. "I always hated bullying.

"Really?", said Rainbow. "Is it a big problem in your world?".

"Definitely", said Randy. "Think I should take her down?".

"Oh, yeah!", said Rainbow. "Maybe you can RKO her. That would teach her a lesson!".

"All right, if you want me to!", chuckled Randy. He had to make sure he didn't hurt Gilda.

Randy entered Sugarcube Corner quietly, so that Gilda didn't hear or see him.

Rainbow dashed into Sugarcube Corner, where Gilda was insulting Yona over her heritage.

"Did I mention how STUPID yaks are some of the time?", said Gilda, continuing her debate on her historical accord of Yakyakistan.

"Hey! Yaks not stupid! Yaks strong and tough!", snorted Yona, the yak being bullied.

"Hey, Gilda!", said Rainbow Dash angrily. "I've had enough of your rotten attitude around ponies! And to make you apologize, I brought a friend!".

"Yeah?", smirked Gilda. "Which one of your other non-pony noobs did ya bring?".

"She brought me, you stupid griffin.". said a voice behind Rainbow. "It's one thing to be racist, especially in my circuit, but being racist to other SPECIES? That's a new low for anyone. Time to pay up!".

Gilda gasped as a large, bipedal figure flew into her, seemingly out of nowhere. Suddenly, she felt her breath being cut off as the bipedal figure grabbed her by the neck. Gilda only had a half-second to react, if that, before her face impacted a white folding table that had someow appeared out of nowhere. The table collapsed with Gilda laying facedown on it, not moving at all. Randy knew he had won, and to make sure of it, he laid down on top of the griffon for 3 seconds to clinch the victory before getting up.

"It only takes one... outta nowhere!", shouted Randy victoriously.

With Gilda finally dealt with, Rainbow took Randy back to Twilight, where she sent him back to his world for that night's Raw.