*“Know thy self, know thy enemy. A thousand battles, a thousand victories.” – Sun Tzu*

My name is Zachary Rivers, or that’s what I used to be called before I was sent to some colorful world after getting shot on the battlefield. The last thing I heard was one of my squadmates saying they have a sniper and then the next thing I knew the only thing I saw was black. As the world faded around me I sat in the darkness of my own mind and a voice called out to me.

“Mr. Zachary Rivers. Mr. Zachery Rivers. What have you gotten yourself into today? I know that you want to protect your country and all but, you didn’t have to get shot you know. "

“First off, who in the fuck are you? Second off, Fuck you. Third off, Where the fuck are you and where the fuck I’m I at?” I yelled at the voice.

The voice sighed and said. " Let’s set some rules here. The first rule is. Your language needs to be more, how should I put this? Less vulgar. The second rule is, Treat me as a god because if you haven’t realized yet I am one. The final rule is, you will stay calm as our conversation will determine what choices you have or if you have a choice in the matter of where you chose to go after death. Now since you asked some questions I have to answer them, The first question I have already answered I am a god and you will treat me as such. Second question, I am everywhere and nowhere at once but if you want a form I’ll give you one if you want one extremely badly.

“Sure, show me what you really look like so I put a face to a name.” After the final word came out the darkness formed into a being showing only light in the room I was in. That moment was the only moment in my life that I was scared of what was shown to me. I saw a beautiful woman that looked like she was out of a world that is only seen in dreams. Her long hair shinned with colors of the rainbow that glistened after a rain shower, She had the body of a goddess’ hourglass figure. If I wasn’t frightened at the sight I would stand on one knee and ask her to marry me in an instant.

“Now your final question to me was. Where are you if I was correct? Now don’t get even more scared now but right now you’re where I like to call The Waiting Room or as you humans call it Purgatory. Now I know what you are thinking and yes you are dead, a .30 caliber bullet to the brain leaves little to no chance of survival. Now on to judgment.” She said while quickly moving towards me and putting her hand on my forehead. “Before you ask why I’m doing this I am thinking if I want to give you a choice from the actions of your sins and what goodwill you have done in this life.”

That’s when I broke and started crying from the memories forming from childhood and on to now, all the good things that I’ve done for other people? That’s not the way I was raised. My family taught me one thing and that was to protect what we believed in and destroying what we didn’t. I believed that I was in the right, I was taught that you have to act like a king then you can get somewhere. This went on for about five minutes but it felt like an eternity.

“Well, I’ve decided that I will give you a choice of where you will spend the rest of your life.” She said while removing her hand. “You have three choices on where you can go. The first the choices should be obvious on what there are, Heaven or Hell.” She smiled as she was about to say the last choice. “I can send you to a world that only had two major fights, Equestria.”

After I did some mental fighting in my head I came with the reasons for where I would like to go, Hell was out of the question. I wasn’t really opposed to Heaven but I can’t stand the color white and gold everywhere so I asked. “What is Equestria?” She looked shocked after I said that. “You know what? Forget that I asked and send me there. I’ve stopped caring” She didn’t look amused when I said that but you know fuck it, whatever I was done with this talk.

“I was hoping you would choose that one.” She smiled and said. “Now one more thing pick a number one through three.” As she raised three fingers up. “This will determine something when you get there.” Her smiled vanished as she seemed to know what I would choose before I said it.

“Give me two.” After I said that she vanished and the white room along with her, the only thing that appeared afterward is a town in the distance below me and the feeling of falling at a speed that I was unfamiliar with. Something in me yelled at me to open up my wings. “Wings?” I said to myself I don’t have wings. The town was closer, about three hundred meters from where I was at that second. I could see the town and what was in it. Ponies are what I saw, not the regular ones back when I was alive but multicolored one with horns and wings. “Are those suits and dresses I see?” Before I realized that I was almost at ground level. “Fuck I’m gonna die again.” I said under my breath.

All I see is darkness again but this time didn’t hear her voice again. What I heard was a heart monitor? As I fully awoken from the darkness again the first thing I saw was a pony in a nurse outfit and a medical cross with a heart on her ass. "

“Oh, you’ve awoken?” She said in a cheery tone. “Are you in any pain?” She asked quickly and scanned my body. “My name is Nurse RedHeart and I’m the one that’s been taking care of you for the past year.” My eyes widened I’m not sure if I was dreaming but a year stuck in the hospital and being nursed back to health by a fucking pony. Of all the shit that I read this takes the fucking cake.

“So you’re telling me that I’ve been in the hospital for a year? After I said that I looked over to my right and outside the door, there was a pure white pony with a rainbow mane the seemed to flow in the wind in the hallway. “Why does she seem so familiar to me?”

The nurse looked and said, " That is Princess Celestia one of the Princesses of Equestria the other being her sister Princess Luna.” She smiled and went out to check on another patient in a separate room.

“Fuck me.” I said as I fell back into the bed and closed my eyes.

Author's Note

New Fanfic from three years of not doing anything and having HEAVY writer's block