Sycamore Trees

“We open on a barren wasteland. Everything in dark green and brown tones, no sharp lines-- only the thick and stifling haze of smog hiding dangers unknown. In the distance, a--”

“What are you doing?” I squinted at the strange zebra. “I thought you were here to analyze my dreams, not describe them to me.”

His eyes snapped open to look at me. His sunglasses slipped down over his eyes, which made him jump. “This is just how I work, Princess. No disrespect, but I'm the expert, here, and I'd appreciate if--”

I cleared my throat. Hector pushed his sunglasses back up into his coifed mane.

The meeting hall was huge with only the two of us sitting here. Every word, sound, and movement echoed profusely. It was not the most welcoming space, that’s for sure.

Hector leaned forward, his elbow on the table between us. “Look, I studied to be a playwright. This is how I see things. I’m gonna describe your dream to you, you tell me how the stuff made you feel,” he said. His voice was very low, like he was sharing a secret.

“What if you’re wrong about something? Wouldn’t it be easier if I just told you?” I matched his volume in an attempt to be respectful.

Hector laughed, and all the respect went out the window. He had heard this before, very clearly. “Look, your majesty: ponies lie about their dreams, even to therapists. They’re personal, they’re probing. If I tell you, we cut the shit and get straight to the point.”

I arched an eyebrow.

“Pardon my Prench. I don’t mean no disrespect.”

Of course.

Call me crazy, but there was something about his demeanor that made me wonder how professional Hector was. Sunglasses, coif, a distinctly NON-Zebracan accent… was this guy for real, or were those stripes painted on?

“Hey!” He glared at me knowingly. “I’m the real deal, Princess!”

So he was slightly psychic. I guess that meant he was telling the truth about something.

“My family’s been here for a long time, that’s all.” He leaned back in his chair. His rear hooves up on the table. “Nearly pure-blooded zebra. Got one Pony ancestor, though; nice fella. A little weird, but sweet, you know? Funny story, actually: he almost married--”

“We’re paying you by the hour, aren’t we?”

His hooves slid off the table and hit the marble with a hollow thud. The chair fell forward as well. It was hard not to think about what kind of damage this unwanted guest was doing to our showiest room.

He gulped. “Uh, where was I?”

“The distance?”

“Right. In the distance… a spire. You can’t tell if it’s natural or ponymade… but it is tall and threatening. How did that make you feel?”

“Threatened?” I guessed, casting a condescending glance at Hector. A tiny smirk broke through my deadpan exterior.

“My mistake. Moving on… you look behind you, realizing for the first time that you carry a torch with your magic. It is now obvious that it is night. The moon hangs above you, missing Luna’s silhouette. Behind you, a forest. How do you feel about the forest?”

I sighed and closed my eyes to focus on the latent image. “It’s… unfamiliar. I’m glad to be out of it, but I’m more afraid of what’s ahead of me.”

“Good, good. Do you recognize what’s ahead of you?”

“No…” I snuck an eye open to peek at Hector. He was sitting pretzel-legged on the chair across from me. What a turd.

“That’s fine.” He nodded slowly. “You refocus on the path ahead. The haze surrounds you, not smothering you, but obscuring everything except the spire. There is a sound in the distance… it’s hard to make out because of the echoes. Some sort of instrument? One minute, I’ll get it…”

“It’s a voice, not an instrument.” I corrected. “Just making melodic vocalizations.”

“And how do you know that?” A hint of superiority. It’s my dream, Hector… Please keep that in mind.

I shrugged. “Again, it feels familiar, but I can’t remember hearing anything like it. It sounds a little like that Countess RaRa song that came out last year, I suppose.”

Hector opened his eyes to beam at me. “I love that song! Is that what that is?” He started to hum the chorus of Sweet Romance.

“I don’t know, Hector!” I spat at him. “I’m guessing! Keep going. The song isn’t what’s bothering me.”

“Okay, whatever you say, Princess.” He wriggled a bit, settling back into his yogi position on the chair. “Um… you were thinking something here. What were you thinking?”

I rolled my neck back to look up at the ceiling, struggling to remember my exact thoughts. “Something about crows?”

“Crows?” Hector repeated. “What do crows mean to you? Anything?”

I shook my head. “I’m… looking for one, I believe.”

“Mm-hm…” Hector nodded slowly, studying me. “Alright, after you think about the crow, you start to walk. The smog is clearing as you move forward, and you see a shape at the top of the spire. You think you recognize it, and then…” He squirmed in his seat a bit.

I hung my head. “And then someone asks me why I’m not doing anything. I say ‘it’s because I’m scared,' and then they tell me to stop being a baby and 'kill it.' That’s the end of the dream.”

Hector struggled to find a response. I was certain he had heard stranger and more disturbing dreams in the past. He must have been shocked to hear the phrase “stop being a baby” from royalty. I guess “kill it” was probably fairly distressing, as well.

“Um…” He shifted in his seat. “Why did you want me to analyze this dream, exactly?”

I released a huge breath, falling back into the chair like it was an old friend. My neck flopped over the back a bit, and I stared at the ceiling in disgust with myself. “Because I’ve had it every night for a week. I was worried it could be an omen of some kind, but I must be losing my touch. I can’t, for the life of me, figure out what it’s supposed to mean.”

“Why not talk to ponies you know? Friends?” he asked. “Why call a shrink?”

I straightened my neck to look at Hector. “I figured a zebra would know better than I, or any of the ponies I know. Am I wrong?”

Hector, suddenly back in therapist mode, sat away from me. “Well, pardon me for interfering, but isn't your sister kinda... good with this stuff? Why not talk to her?”

My eyes flicked to the floor. "That's, erm... complicated."

"Do you feel any animosity towards your sister?"

I shook my head with undue force.

“Is there anypony else in your past that might stir up anger or resentment? Peer-pressuring college roommate, for example?” he suggested.

“No.”

“Um… smothering parents?”

“I promise, all of my relationships are healthy and well-kept.”

Hector rubbed the back of his head with a hoof. “Well… fog could represent a question you have, or a secret you’re keeping.”

I gave a dry chuckle. “I don’t have any skeletons in my closet, if that’s what you’re getting at.”

“Of course not, Princess.”

There was a long silence as Hector tried to think of something to say. I wouldn’t even be speaking with him had Luna not paid for him to come here. She was sick of my insomnia. Hooves on marble floors made quite a bit of racket. My sleepless nights were hers.

Large meeting rooms such as this one were marvelous for summits and the like. With only two of us here, though… The vaulted ceilings, uncomfortable chairs, and life-sized stained glass portraits did not make for a therapeutic environment. Cold and clinical did not make me want to spill my feelings.

Hector leaned back in his chair. “I’m sorry, your majesty. In my professional opinion, you’ve got something other than dreams running through that head. You need a zebra better than me to crack that code.”

I was silent.

“I mean… you can still talk to me if you wanna finish out the hour. I’m happy to listen.” A flash of genuine kindness.

“That’s very sweet.”

Hector smiled softly, blushing as he looked at the floor. “Yeah, well…”

“What do I owe you?”

He stood up. “It’s on me, Princess. If you’re not completely satisfied, yada, yada, yada…”

“Well, at least let me cover your travel expenses. You came a long way for a ten minute conversation, and I just--”

“No, no.” He grabbed a baseball cap off the table where he had left it, pulling it down over his head very tightly. “Don’t worry, I’ll be home in no time. It’s no problem.”

“At least stay the night,” I suggested. Hector was already standing in front of the double doors.

“I’d really better get back. Catch you on the flipside, Princess.”

I frowned and watched him leave. An odd little character… I wonder where Luna had dug him up.

Just as I was about to leave myself, Hector’s head appeared once again between the double doors. “If I could just give one free piece of advice?”

I bit my lip and nodded curtly.

“Not everything is the end of the world. A lot of weird stuff helps in ways you don’t even realize.” He shook his head. “What I mean is… maybe being up all night worrying about your dream stopped something else from happening, and you don’t even know it yet. Maybe somepony was fixing to rob the place, but the guard was alert watching you and they didn’t. Maybe--”

“Thank you, Hector. I’ll keep that in mind.”

He smiled down at the floor. “I don’t know much, but I know that beating yourself up over something like this isn’t gonna make it better.”

“Yes, thank you, Hector,” I said a little more forcefully.

He got the message. “Right. I’ll just, uh…”

Hector struggled to close the heavy door behind him. With a thud, he was gone.

My eyelids were heavy with the hours of sleep I had missed. Maybe the little zebra was right. If I could only find a way to get past my fear that I was missing some sort of important message…

Luna was waiting anxiously right outside the door at the opposite end of the hall. “Well? That was very fast. Should I be concerned that it was so fast?”

I shrugged and passed her without a word. She trotted back to my side.

“Sister, I’m sure you’ll stop having this strange dream soon enough. Maybe even tonight!” She flashed a forced grin.

“Please don’t lie to me,” I muttered. “You said yourself: it’s not even a dream. You can’t see it, you can’t interact with it, you can’t fix it… things like this don’t just fix themselves. That would be like… it would be like the moon coming up all on its own. Like the seasons turning over without the help of the ponies. Like--”

Luna stopped me with a gentle hoof on my shoulder. She said nothing, but looked me right in the eyes, a mixture of worry and sorrow filling her own. “If it were truly important, don’t you think I would be having the dreams as well? Or Twilight, or Cadence?”

I drew in a harsh breath. “Maybe this is something I have to face on my own.”

Luna chuckled. “In the interest of fairness, I would say you’ve had enough alone time. I’m not sure what the universe has in mind, but spending a thousand years ruling Equestria solo seems plenty.”

I yawned.

“It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.”

I squinted at her. “Did you just quote A.K. Yearling at me?”

“Damn, I was hoping you wouldn’t notice…”

I laughed. “You underestimate my memory.”

“I think we all underestimate you, sister.”

Luna drew the shades gently closed. “Just try to sleep for an hour. If you have the nightmare again, come get me in the library.”

“What if I can’t fall asleep?” I asked, my voice as innocent as a sleepy foal.

Luna glanced at me, shying away from the question. “All due respect, sister, but those dark circles could be team spirit paint by now. I don’t think you’ll have any trouble getting to sleep.”

I growled softly and rubbed my cheeks, as though that would wipe away the marks of sleep deprivation.

“And don’t try to stay awake just to spite me.”

My covers lit up blue as Luna tucked me in tight. She left the room without another word, closing the door softly behind her.

It wasn’t hard for me to find a comfortable position. I think I could have fallen asleep in the mosh pit at a death metal concert.

Of course, the dream came again.

A feeling of dread washed over me before the scene even registered. I had been trudging through thick and foul-smelling green-brown smog. Everything was green-brown, in fact. It was a dichrome hell.

My brain was working hard to process both my personal thoughts and my in-dream thoughts. Personally, I was just scared and disgusted. My dream-self, however, was confused and disturbed. Something about this repressed and repulsive landscape was bothering me in a different way… it wasn't unlike the creeping dread of realizing you are lost and alone.

I looked behind me. The flame of the torch, the soft glow of the ancient moon. Brambles and bushes receding from my thoughts, disappearing into the distance.

My focus returned to the wasteland ahead of me. I have to find the crow.

Stupid crow. That stupid, mysterious crow was on my mind at all times. I have to find the crow.

Out of the darkness, then, came the angelic voice. It was so far away and soft that it was impossible to tell who was singing, or what the piece was. But it was so beautiful… I just knew it was a voice. And it was the voice of somepony I cared for, deeply.

Logic said that the voice came from the shape on the spire, but that was the one gut feeling I didn’t seem to have.

Just as a flicker of familiarity came to me, just as I thought I knew what the shape was, another voice interrupted.

“Why aren’t you doing anything?” she shouted in distress.

“I’m scared…” I whispered.

She scoffed. “You big baby! Kill it already!”

It was all very familiar. Except--

“Sis! Crush it!” Luna shrieked. “It’s your turn!”

“What?”

“I’ll tell!” she threatened. Her face was so much… younger. So sweet and gentle. “Okay, I won’t tell… but, dammit, this is the deal!”

Of course. That’s the deal. We hate killing spiders.

I smashed the spider with my hoof and wiped it off on the carpet.

Luna shivered a little. “Gross. I hate spiders.”

“I must have sleep-walked down here…” I murmured. “Was I acting weird at all?”

Luna gave me an odd look, then laughed goofily. “Yeah, right. You sleep-ran down here and sleep-told-me-off for sleep-being-a-wimp.”

I ignored her mistake. “I had the dream again. I’ll have to kill time until sundown. Unless, of course, you’re willing to bring the moon up right now.” I laughed.

Another exaggeratedly confused look. “What in the hell are you talking about? And, by the way, I don’t appreciate you making jokes just because I can’t move the moon yet. Dad says I’ll get it soon enough.”

There was a far-off chime of a clock tower.

“Speaking of!” Luna brushed past me. “It’s time for my lesson with him.”

Had the dream finally changed? My heart leapt with delight. I would surely wake up soon… I would surely find Luna here in the library, back to her usual, subdued self.

But there was something about the way her pale-blue mane bounced that told me this was real.

Was this the warning the dream was trying to give me? Had Luna… regressed? I mean, it wouldn’t be the first time. She had had a very difficult couple of weeks trying to return to normal after the latest Nightmare Moon incident. That moon phase magic had a very strange effect on her… If she had crawled back into her shell, though, what was it that had set her off this time?

I was in my own little world as I trotted through the castle halls and back to my bedroom. It was a dream. Luna was fine. She was very strong now, very responsible. There was nothing that could shake her, certainly.

A guard snapped to attention as I moved past him. “Princess Celestia!”

I paused. That voice… it did not belong to any of my current staff, and yet it sounded familiar.

“You don’t have to do that. Did the other guards tell you that you had to do that?”

His attention faltered slightly. “Erm… you don’t want to be saluted anymore?”

I gave a dry chuckle. “I haven’t wanted a salute for a long time now. Don’t worry, it’s no trouble.”

The guard breathed a sigh of relief. “Apologies, your majesty.”

As he relaxed (somewhat dramatically), the visor on his armor slipped down over his eyes. With a harsh clang, the polished metal caught my warped reflection. A short snout. A diminutive horn. A bobbed, bright-pink mane which lay against my face, perfectly still.

The guard chuckled in embarrassment and pushed the visor back up.

“No, no, wait!” Without thinking, without caring, I slammed the visor back down over his eyes and stared right into the soul of my own reflection.

“Your majesty?” he whispered. “This visor is just for show. I can’t see through it.”

“Holy shit…” I muttered.

He pretended not to hear.

“I’m…” I pressed on my face with one hoof, watching the reflection carefully. “I’m so young!”

“Y-yes. Yes, you are…” he agreed hesitantly.

“What year is this?” I demanded. “What year?”

“It’s 1523, Princess!” he responded. “1523, AUC!”

AUC. Ab urbe condita. 1523 years since the kingdom was established. I was--

“Eighteen!” I shrieked.

The guard slid his visor up. “Um… that’s right, Princess. You just turned eighteen last week, didn’t you? Did it just hit you or something?”

I wanted to just sit down right there. Just sit and not move until this whole thing passed. It had to be a spell, or a vision, or a really, really intense dream. Just sit down. Pull a couple of hairs out of your mane. Put on a band-aid and rip it off. Do something. Wake up, for Tartarus’ sake!

“Princess?” The guard stepped forward. “Do you want me to get your parents? Do you need some… water?”

And then came the strongest impulse I had had in a very long time; stronger than all of my past visions combined.

“I need to find the crow.”

For the next hour or so, I was like a mare possessed. Possessed by what, though? That was the question. I wandered through the streets, pushing past ponies begging to speak with me, entirely absorbed with finding the crow. Of all things to obsess about today, finding a bird should have been lowest on the list. I knew that, somewhere. I think. And yet…

I kept telling myself that this wasn’t real. I just had to get to the crow and it would probably fly at my face and I would wake up. I would wake up, and I would have a new story to tell my sister and my therapist. And then the dreams would stop, and I would be back to helping Twilight and her friends solve their mundane issues.

There was nothing I wanted more than Spike to send me a letter at just this moment. A letter that would fall on my head and bring me back to the real world, to the present.

But this was the present, now. And the event which brought me back was a more-familiar voice shouting a less-familiar word.

“Salamander!” she cried. “Salamander, wait!”

It was Crow. She was right behind me.

I whirled around to see a dark-colored, but brightly-expressed face. It was so very close to being familiar: bright blue eyes and a matching mane which curled around her features, round glasses which sat low on her snout... even her height and frame seemed to stir up dim memories.

As she took in the sight before her, the mare's face fell. It fell past disappointment, past frustration, past even healthy anger and right into full-blown rage. "You?" she whispered, almost huskily. For some reason, my feelings of familiarity tripled.

I looked down my front, somehow expecting to find the reason for her sudden unholy wrath stapled to my chest. "A-are you... crow?"

"I wish to Tartarus I wasn't, but lucky me!" The mare reared up and pounded the pavement with both of her front hooves. "Lucky FUCKIN' me!"

At this, the ponies around us seemed to jump back, now giving our confrontation a wide berth. I could have sworn I heard whispers which included the word "princess," but didn't have the time to give them thought.

"I'm sorry, I think I missed something," I murmured.

"Don't even get me started on what you've missed, Sunny," she snapped. "I can't believe I've been traipsing around with all these damn ponies looking for you. You're not even worth the time of day."

I took a step back, searching for a way out.

"It's me, you idiot!" The mare's left eye shifted slightly, seemed to fade away like a mirage. Beneath the bright and welcoming blue was a sickly green. It flashed with violence and anger.

Realization gripped my chest and tightened on my throat. I tried to run backwards but my hoof slipped out from under me, and the mare was upon me once again.

"You finally fear me?" she asked. "You're right to. I nearly defeated you last time, but in this form you are truly powerless."

I scrambled to get further away. "Changeling..."

"Say my name."

My breath hitched in my throat.

"Say it, Celestia."

"Chrysalis."

A smug grin warmed her face. "That's right, pony," she spat. "And you're getting me back to the present if it kills you."