Screw The Rules, I Have Pony: Part Deux

by DmitriTheWriter

Rating: everyone
Tags: Main 6, Other, Yu-Gi-Oh, Spike, Comedy, Princess Celestia, Crossover, Random, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Human
Length: 1313

Seto Kaiba wants a rematch with Yami Yugi after the events of 'Screw The Rules, I Have Pony'. Absolute absurdity ensues.

After the events of 'Screw The Rules, I Have Pony', Seto Kaiba challenges Yami Yugi to a rematch, intending to use every made-up card and made-up rule he can think of to win. Problem is, Yami Yugi intends to do the same. More MLP characters are summoned as monster cards and reality quickly goes out to lunch.

Published 2018-06-06 05:10:07 UTC
Last updated 2018-06-06 05:10:07 UTC

The Rematch Nobody Asked For

Seto Kaiba and Yami Yugi were back at Kaiba's holographic system, ready to summon virtual monsters in a hopefully coherent duel this time.

"Kaiba, are you ready?!" Yami asked.

"Let's finish this once and for all!" Kaiba replied.

Yami started the duel with 2,000 Life Points, while Kaiba started with 78,841.

"My mo-"

"It's my turn!" Kaiba interrupted. "I play the Pot of Greed magic card! This allows me to draw seven more cards!" Kaiba drew seven more cards. "I also summon Celestia, the Alicorn Princess in attack mode and end my turn!"

Princess Celestia shimmered onto the field, with 3,500 Attack Points.

"This seems awfully familiar," Yami noticed.

"Just wait, Yugi," Kaiba said.

"It's my move!" Yami shouted. "I cast Polymerization and fusion summon the Cutie Mark Crusaders in attack mode!"

The Cutie Mark Crusaders shimmered onto the field with 2,000 Attack Points.

"What in tarnation is this?!" Apple Bloom questioned.

"Is that Princess Celestia?" Sweetie Belle asked.

"Whoa, this is so cool!" Scootaloo said.

"I see you're using fake cards as well, Yugi," Kaiba said.

"Well you're the one who started it," Yami said. "I set two cards face down on the field and end my turn!"

"Let me show you how a real duelist plays, Yugi!" Kaiba said. "I send Celestia to the Graveyard in order to tribute summon Nightmare Moon in attack mode!"

Celestia's form shattered into shards of yellow light, and the shards flew over to the Graveyard. Soon, a purple light began to shine on one of the spaces on Kaiba's side of the field. From that light, a chariot appeared, pulled by pegasi with bat wings and piloted by Nightmare Moon, who had 5,000 Attack Points. On Yami's side, the Cutie Mark Crusaders' legs shook violently, with Sweetie Belle hiding behind Apple Bloom and Scootaloo shivering.

"I thought you needed to tribute more monsters to summon that!" Yami shouted.

"I'm Seto Kaiba, I can do what I want," Kaiba retorted. "I set one card face down on the field and end my turn!"

"Unless I can draw something good here, I'm done for," Yami thought. He then drew a card, which was exactly the card he needed.

"I summon the Elements of Harmony!" On Yami's central monster space, a portal of pure white light opened up, and the Mane Six, donned with their respective Element, rose from the portal before it closed.

"This again?" Twilight Sparkle asked annoyedly.

"Didn't we beat Nightmare Moon years ago?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"I attack Nightmare Moon with the Rainbow of Light!" Yami shouted. The Elements of Harmony each shot out a colored beam, which converged to form a rainbow bound for Nightmare Moon.

"Not so fast, Yugi!" Kaiba said. "I activate my trap card, Negate Attack!" Kaiba laughed as his trap card absorbed the powerful rainbow. Yami slammed his hand onto his playing surface, his teeth gritted and his hope fading.

"I guess that ends my turn," Yami conceded.

"It's my move!" Kaiba declared. "First, I play my Everfree Seeds magic card, which destroys your Elements of Harmony!" The Elements crumbled to dust from where the Mane Six were still wearing them. They immediately noticed and started to panic. "Next I play Polymerization and fusion summon my Blue-Eyes Ultimate Dragon in attack mode!"

On Kaiba's side of the field, a white light began to shine, which revealed...Spike yet again taking his midday nap. he had 50 Attack Points.

"Are you kidding me? Again?" Kaiba was not amused.

"I don't know what to tell you, Mr. Kaiba. Blue-Eyes is out sick again." Spike said.

Kaiba placed his right thumb and index finger on the bridge of his nose and grunted. "Alright then. I attack Twilight Sparkle with Nightmare Moon!" Twilight's eyes bulged upon hearing this.

"Oh no, this is absolutely horrible!" Rarity said.

"You can say that again, Rarity," Sweetie Belle replied.

"Apple Bloom? Sweetie Belle? Scootaloo? What are you doing here?" Twilight asked. None of the Cutie Mark Crusaders had any response.

"Ha! You just activated my trap card, Kaiba!" Yami shouted confidently. "I activate Swords of Revealing Light!" Three shining white swords came down from the sky in front of Nightmare Moon. "This prevents you from attacking for three turns!"

"I know what the card does, Yugi!" Kaiba shouted.

"You can do this, Seto!" Mokuba shouted from the bleachers adjacent to the battlefield.

"Shut up, Mokuba," Kaiba replied. "I guess that ends my turn,"

"It's my move!" Yami shouted. "I cast Monster Reborn, which allows me to take any card from the Graveyard and summon it to the field! And I choose Celestia, the Alicorn Princess!"

Celestia shimmered back onto the field with her 3,500 Attack Points, this time on Yami's side of the field.

"Can you even take cards from my Graveyard using Monster Reborn?" Kaiba asked quizzically.

"Who cares? It's what I'm doing," Yami replied flippantly.

"You can do this Yugi!" Joey called out.

"Yeah, you can do this! We support you!" Tea added.

"I'm just here for the food," Tristan said.

"Where did you guys come from?!" Yami asked. "Oh forget it, I attack Nightmare Moon with Celestia!" Celestia shot a magic blast at Nightmare Moon.

"Nightmare Moon is stronger than Celestia! Your attack is useless!" Kaiba declared confidently. His face changed from a smug smirk to a mouth agape in shock when Celestia's magic blast actually dissolved Nightmare Moon. "Wha-! But how?!"

"Screw the rules, I'm a main character!" Yami shouted. "I end my turn!"

"It's my turn!" Kaiba declared. "Since I'm the president of the world's largest gaming corporation, I get one free monster to summon from my deck! And I summon Chrysalis, Queen of the Changelings!"

Chrysalis shimmered onto the field with a black and green glow about her. She had 3,800 Attack Points.

"I activate a quick-play spell!" Yami shouted. "Phoenix Down! This instantly sends any undead monster on the field that I choose to the Graveyard! And I choose Chrysalis!"

Aaaaand she's gone.

"Aah, impossible!" Kaiba said.

"And I send Rarity and Fluttershy to the Graveyard in order to tribute summon my Dark Magician!" Yami added.

"Wait, WHAT!" Rarity could not believe what she was hearing.

"Isn't it still my turn?" Kaiba asked.

"Well you don't seem to care either way," Yami replied.

"In that case, as president of KaibaCorp, I declare this invalid!" Kaiba declared.

Rarity and Fluttershy breathed sighs of relief.

"I set a card face down on the field and attack Twilight Sparkle with Nightmare Moon. I end my turn!" Kaiba shouted.

Nightmare Moon reappeared onto the field. She pawed at the ground and charged at Twilight, and Twilight braced for impact. At that moment, her amount of Attack Points was revealed...to be 5,001. Nightmare Moon promptly dissolved again, and Kaiba's Life Points went down to 78,840.

"That's what you get for trying to cheat, Kaiba!" Yami said.

"Wait, what?" Kaiba said, trying to figure out what just happened.

"It's my move!" Yami shouted. "I use Twilight Sparkle to attack your life points directly!"

"Okay then," Twilight said as she fired a magic blast in Kaiba's direction.

"You just activated my trap card, Yugi!" Kaiba declared. "Giant Mirror! It takes any attack against me and uses it to attack your Life Points directly!"

"Oh not this crap again!" Yami said.

Twilight's magic blast reflected against the mirror and hit Yami for massive damage. His life points scrolled all the way to 0.

"NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!" Yami screamed as the Mane Six and Cutie Mark Crusaders dissolved before his eyes.

Kaiba laughed. "I have finally beaten you in a duel, Yugi Moto!"

"Yugi lost?!" Joey shouted.

"How could this have happened?!" Tea asked.

"I'm just here for the food," Tristan said.

"I guess I lost. Congratulations, Kaiba," Yami left the battlefield with his friends.

"You won, Seto! Congratulations!" Mokuba said,

"Shut up, Mokuba," Kaiba replied.