“Attention all units,” Jessamine said over the announcement system of the underground complex as the combat simulation siren began to blare. “Combat training has now begun. All magic artifacts, save for melee weapons, now require energy crystals to serve as ammunition rather than your own internal magic. Additional magic artifacts can be found throughout the combat arena and the full-use spell is now in effect, meaning that anypony can use any artifact they encounter or steal from another creature, save, of course, for Founder Artifacts. Caboose will be allowed to provide support from the control room. The objective of all other units is now to defeat Tempest Fizzlepop in combat or through environmental means.

“Gentlecolts, good luck,” she added and hung up. And she didn’t need to wait long for the chaos to begin.

“RUUUUUN!” Simmer yelled in a panic as he, Sarge, and Grind Stone came galloping out of the hallway leading towards the exit where Tempest had been waiting in ambush.

“OH CRAP, WHERE IS SHE!?” Grind Stone yelled as they jumped down from the elevated platform and into the maze of shipping containers. Sarge, at least, had the common sense to fire off a few shots from his magic cannon back the way they had come, and even threw a magic bomb down the hallway to try and delay Tempest for a couple of seconds.

“I DON’T WANT TO DIE!” Simmer screamed hysterically as they disappeared into the maze of containers. Jess tried not to facehoof.

“Jess! We have to help them!” Caboose exclaimed, prancing from hoof to hoof in the control room next to Jessamine’s station of monitors. Jessamine hid a sigh. Even though she had explained what was going to happen before the exercise began, she knew Caboose would likely still be lost for quite a bit.

“You can’t help them, Caboose, at least not directly. Only they are allowed to directly fight Tempest.”

As if summoned by her name, Tempest came sprinting out of the hallway and practically flung herself from the raised platform onto one of the shipping containers, disappearing into the maze in hot pursuit of Red Team. Well, MOST of Red Team, given that Donut, along with Wash, was undergoing his yearly psychological evaluation.

Maybe that was for the best. Knowing Donut, if he was here, there’d be a lot of glitter involved and this whole training session was already enough of a mess.

“The only thing you can use is the control console in front of you to help them.”

“But she’ll kill them!” Caboose exclaimed, pointing out the window dramatically.

“They’ll be fine,” Jessamine said with a small eyeroll. “All safety spells are now set to ‘endurance,’ and you remember what that means, right? If they get hit with something, it’ll hurt, but the spells will block pretty much all the actual damage. Same with everypony’s weapons – they’re all stuck on ‘stun’ mode. Your team will be a bit sore, maybe a little bruised, but they’ll be all right.”

I hope, she added to herself as she turned back to the cameras. It only took a moment for her to locate the Red team, and she could tell that things were just getting started.

“Come on, stallions! Double time! Hay, I’d settle for single time!” Sarge exclaimed, his head swiveling around as Simmer and Grind Stone tried to catch their breaths.

“Maybe we should just fight,” Simmer said, using a wall to push himself back into a standing position. “I’m afraid she’s gonna start picking us off one by—”

BANG!

“ONE!” Simmer screamed in terror as a black armored hoof punched through the wall and grabbed him by the throat.

Oh boy…

“Heeerrrre’s TEMPEST!” Tempest screamed in what Jess could only describe as sadistic joy, pulling Simmer’s face into the wall with a loud clang of his helmet and then kicking the entire wall across the floor and into the maroon pony.

“OW!” Simmer’s muffled yell came from behind the wall.

That had to hurt, Jess thought with a small grimace. He’ll be ok though. No pony dies from being bruised.

“Lesson one, anything can be a weapon if you try hard enough!” Tempest yelled to the trapped pony before turning towards Grind Stone and Sarge.

Grind Stone, despite clearly panicking, tried to summon his founder’s weapon, but Tempest was faster and hurled a broken chunk of wall at him, knocking the crystal gauntlet off his leg before it could materialize the weapon. Sarge tried to bring his weapon to bear, but Tempest was already moving and knocked the cannon upward as he pulled the trigger. The magic blast flew straight up and rained sparks down as Tempest gave Sarge a quick punch to the stomach and threw the red stallion towards Grind Stone.

Unfortunately for the orange stallion, between his panicked backpedaling and Sarge tripping over the piece of wall, Sarge’s head ended up nailing Grind Stone right between the legs. Even Jess winced at that.

“OWww!” Grind Stone cried, whinnying in pain as Sarge staggered back to his hooves. The orange stallion fumbled for his gauntlet, but it was too far away and neither he nor Sarge could recover before Tempest charged them, tackling them through three wooden walls and hurling them into a strangely tall tower of metal drums.

Jess slammed her hoof on the announcement system. “Tempest! What did we say about hitting below the belt?”

“Hey, that was a complete accident!” Tempest defended. “How was I supposed to know Sarge would trip? Just thought they would crash into each other!”

“I understand that, but you need still need to be more careful,” Jess said, trying not to let her annoyance leak into her tone. “Grind Stone’s had enough injures down there after yesterday, and even if he’s been given extra magic protection today, I don’t need you causing any more med wing trips by going too hard.”

“Noted. I’ll do what I can to avoid any unnecessary injuries,” Tempest said with a nod. However, she was still grinning slightly as she began to stalk towards the downed Red Team members.

Note to self: Accident or not, I need to keep an eye out for any more improper strikes.

“Hmmm…” Caboose said, prompting Jess to look over at the blue stallion. Said stallion was staring intently at the control panel. So intently, in fact, it looked like he might be trying to psychically communicate with it. Which, if it happened, wouldn’t be the strangest thing he would have done. Shaking her head, she turned back to the cameras.

On another monitor, she noticed Simmer finally managed to free himself from between the wall and the crate he had been pinned to. Yet strangely, she still couldn’t see Church or Tucker on any of the monitors. Where WERE they?

“Oh harmony, forget this! I need a bigger weapon!” Simmer exclaimed to no pony in particular before rushing off back the way Red Team had come.

Another note to self: Simmer talks to himself when stressed and may potentially give away important information. Have Wash help him with that, Jess thought as she watched Simmer run towards the control booth.

Within seconds, he was standing on a platform looking up at Caboose and Jess with big, nervous eyes. “Caboose, help us!”

“How? Jess won’t let me!” Caboose exclaimed, giving her his best pouty face. “She’s being mean! This place is filled with mean ladies!”

Jess rolled her eyes again, but she couldn’t quite hide her smile all the way.

“Push some buttons? I don’t know!” Simmer said, waving wildly at the console in front of Caboose.

Caboose blinked.

Then blinked again.

Then smiled widely.

Here we go.

“Buttons!?” he exclaimed like a foal on Hearth’s Warming Day. “OH PONY, I LOVE BUTTONS! Beep bop bo boop…”

His hooves began hitting every button he could find on the console (and a couple off of it…somehow). Up above Simmer, a smaller storage container tipped over, dumping a load of unbonded magic weapon gems and ammo crystals at Simmer’s hooves.

Jess knew the whole area was filled with hidden caches of training gear to be found during these exercises, so finding one in a place only a pegasus might be able to get to wasn’t surprising at all. She was, however, a little surprised that one had been placed on a random box of all places, especially with so many ammo crystals.

Simmer grabbed one that transformed into a large set of side-mounted magic projectile launchers! “Wow! That actually worked perfectly! Thanks!” he yelled, grabbing as many of the ammo energy crystals as he could before running off.

“Great!” Caboose yelled out happily after Simmer, before turning to Jess with dopey confusion on his face. “How the heck did I do that?”

“Invisible magic,” Jess said. Despite all of his prowess with machinery (when he wasn’t breaking it, of course), Caboose had basically no understanding of electricity, but somehow, replacing the word ‘electricity’ with ‘invisible magic’ just WORKED for him. Jess had no idea who figured that out, but on days like today, she was glad for it. No reason to make Caboose even more confused with everything going on.

“Oooh, ok,” Caboose said, satisfied.

Jess gave him a quick pat on the head and turned back to the cameras. With those magic launchers now in play, maybe the Reds and Blues would actually stand a chance against Tempest now.

Maybe.

Ok, a small chance, but still a chance.

Jess turned back to the maze camera just in time to see a blur of aqua as Tucker collided with Simmer as the maroon pony rounded the corner, both ponies falling to the ground with a painful thump.

THERE’S Tucker! Seriously, where the hay was he? He was on the other side of the maze, not the other side of the ISLAND! How did it take him this long to catch up after I made the announcement? Did he not try flying over the crates to find the disturbance? Or did he not want to risk Tempest finding out where he was? Note to self, again: Teach Tucker about using flight in short bursts to gather reconnaissance without compromising your position.

“Hey, Simmer, what the hay is going on in there?” Tucker exclaimed, staggering back to his hooves as the crystal pony groaned. “Church and I split up, but then I heard the announcement and couldn’t find him again. Well, I heard part of it. I think the speakers are bugged. They cut out before I could hear half the message.”

Ok, another note to self: have maintenance check the speaker systems before the next training round. And if Church isn’t with Tucker, then WHERE IS HE? I can’t see him on any of the monitors. Hopefully he didn’t turn off his ears again. King Sparrow still doesn’t know how Church managed to create that feature in the first place…

“Ow!” came a pained cry from Grind Stone, yanking Jess out of her thoughts.

“Tucker! It’s you! You gotta to help us!” Simmer cried, finally managing to shake off the impact and leaping back to his hooves. He pointed at the crystal wristband around Tucker’s leg. “Do you know how to use that thing!?”

“My sword? Hay yeah, I know how to use it,” Tucker cockily exclaimed, puffing his chest and wings out in pride. “What’s not to understand about swish-swish-stab? It’s a freaking sword dude, not an airship.”

I’d HOPE it wasn’t an airship. I can’t even imagine the amount of chaos you all would cause with an airship. Sarge causes enough chaos with that vehicle of his even when it’s broken!

“Then come help me,” Simmer grumbled, charging off past Tucker. The greenish-blue pegasus shrugged and followed behind the irritated unicorn.

Tempest, meanwhile, was decidedly kicking Grind Stone and Sarge’s collective plots as she knocked them to the ground once again. Both ponies tried to stagger back to their hooves, but only Grind Stone managed to pull himself together in time to dodge metal drum Tempest threw next. Sarge wasn’t so lucky and was nailed in the face with it, staggering away as Grind Stone frantically materialized his back-up weapon. He fired a burst of lasers at Tempest, but the mare was too fast and dodged the inaccurate shots with ease, closing the distance to the two stallions.

“Lesson two,” Tempest yelled. “Recover quickly and be aware of follow-up attacks. Never assume the enemy will wait for you!”

And yet you attacked them before they even COULD recover! Jess thought, suppressing a small sigh. I need to remember to talk to her about this later. Jess turned her attention back to the cameras.

Quick as a flash, Tempest grabbed both Grind Stone and Sarge by the necks, smashed their heads together, then punched them both so hard that the stallions spun in place. Sarge tried to use his magic cannon, but a quick buck from Tempest sent the shot wide and made the older stallion collapse. Grind Stone tried to fire again, but Tempest dodged and knocked the weapon away.

“Time for some close quarters combat training!” Tempest yelled as she proceeded to strike Grind Stone with a series of quick jabs and kicks, forcing him back. She delivered a powerful buck, knocking the orange stallion over, but before he hit the floor, she grabbed his leg and yanked him back to her, raising her hoof for a dramatic downward strike.

DON’T YOU DARE, TEMPEST!

“WAITWAITWAIT—” Grind Stone screamed, desperately waving his hooves in a blind panic.

Thankfully, Tempest adjusted her aim at the last second, scoring a brutal blow to Grind Stone’s stomach instead. But Jess could barely let out the breath she was holding before the unicorn drove her hind hoof into Grind Stone’s side, sending him flying into a nearby storage container.

“Tempest, don’t think I didn’t see where you were about to punch Grind Stone!” she yelled into the microphone as Grind Stone moaned in pain and fumbled to find his hooves. “What did I just say two minutes ago?!”

I don’t care if that could have been so much worse – she should NOT have been aiming there.

“But I didn’t hit him there! And I wasn’t going to! In fact, Grind Stone! Lesson three! The enemy will always seek to exploit any opening, no matter how underhoofed! You can’t let yourself be caught in that position! When I was trained, my opponents wouldn’t hesitate to exploit such an opening,” Tempest called out, earning another groan from Grind Stone. Jess just facehoofed.

She looked up again just in time to see a large orange rectangular device that had been precariously balanced on the smashed storage container wobble and drop, falling onto the still-struggling-to-stand Grind Stone. He vanished, only to come flying out of the nearby blue rectangular device, flopping across the ground in pain. Jess saw Tempest blink, then looked at back at the orange device.

“Oooooh, right. The teleporters are available today. Neat.” Tempest said, looking at the device thoughtfully.

At least the teleporter means Grind Stone is out of melee range for the moment, Jess thought as she shook her head. Just because it’s better than when you were trained doesn’t mean that it’s acceptable here. Even if she IS following my order and avoiding unnecessary injuries. However, before she could tell Tempest that such a move was excessive, another voice yelled out.

“Hey, sweetcheeks!”

Tempest whirled around to face the voice, before quickly ducking to avoid a blue orb flying directly towards her face. The orb instead hit the wall nearby and erupted in a burst of magic, raining sparks over Tempest and Grind Stone. Grind Stone didn’t react, but Tempest leapt back to her hooves in a battle stance, her eyes quickly locking onto her newest challenger.

“Remember me? Step away from the idiots!” Tucker called out, flying down and stylishly sliding across the floor into a two-legged stance. His crystal wristband glowed a bright green and, with a dramatic swish of his foreleg, two beams of pure magic exploded out from the band, extending away from Tucker’s hoof into a razor-sharp dual-bladed sword.

And then, for no reason, he posed dramatically, as if he was some famous knight about to do battle against Akumu itself. All while giving Tempest his cockiest grin.

Why WOULDN’T she remember you? You literally just saw each other about an hour ago before the match started. And why are you POSING!? This is a guard training session, not some famous play! If you hadn’t yelled, you might have even been able to launch a stealth attack against Tempest! Why are you LIKE THIS, Tucker!?

Tempest, however, gave a downright predatory grin and cracked her neck in anticipation.

“Finally, somepony who might actually give me a good workout. Let’s see if you know how to really fight. And if not, I’ll be sure to give you some tips,” she said enthusiastically, slowly walking forward to meet Tucker. Tucker matched her pace, and the two of them slowly began to circle one another.

Jess leaned back in her chair, trying to prepare for whatever nonsense would come out of this match, but a smudge of maroon appeared on a storage container behind Tempest’s head, followed by a very panicked-looking Simmer.

She clicked over to a camera that was closer to him as he slowly clambered onto the container, dragging a rocket launcher with him.

Now THIS could be interesting. What is HE up to?

“Oh harmony, please don’t let her see me,” Simmer whispered, carefully loading the ammo into his weapon. His voice was so soft that even with the closer camera, Jess could barely hear him, but she could tell it was shaking. Badly

“What’s this button do?”

Jess turned just in time to watch Caboose hit a purple button on the console.

Clank!

BANG!

“Huh?” Tucker exclaimed in shock.

Jess whipped her head back to the cameras just as a large storage container slammed down in front of Tucker, cutting him off from Tempest.

The unicorn on the other hoof, jumped back in surprise. “Where the heck did that come from?” she asked to no one in particular.

“Yes! I saved Tucker!” Caboose yelled over the intercom in excitement. “OH WAIT! I saved Tucker.”

You don’t need to sound so depressed about that, Caboose, Jess thought, unable to hold back her chuckle at the sheer absurdity of…whatever was happening here. She would have said that she had long since lost the plot, but she wasn’t entirely sure these guys ever HAD a plot to begin with.

“Caboose, what are you doing?!” Tucker yelled in annoyance. “You’re messing up my plan with Simmer! I was supposed to distract her for him!”

Jess double-facehoofed.

WHY would you yell that out ON THE MIDDLE OF THE BATTLEFIELD! You NEVER YELL YOUR PLAN AT THE ENEMY! For Harmony’s sake, Tucker!

“What!?” Tempest yelled, whirling around just in time to see Simmer finish loading the ammo into the battle saddle.

“YOU RATTED ME OUT, YOU IDIOT!” Simmer screamed in a highly justified panic. He frantically took aim at Tempest and firing the first shot from the right launcher. An oval of magic came blasting out, speeding towards its target on a stream of magic fire. Tempest leapt to the side, barely dodging the ensuing explosion as the projectile hit the floor next to her.

Tempest sprinted over and grabbed the blue teleporter device. “Lesson four! Never give away the location of a teammate moving to flank. Hey, Simmer!” she yelled, hurling the teleporter at the panicking unicorn stallion. “CATCH!”

“Oh, buck!” Simmer yelled, frantically backpedaling and firing his left weapon at the teleporter. Jess was fairly certain he meant to hit the EDGE of the device and knock it away from him, but instead the blast went straight through the blue device—

—and came out of the orange device at the base of the storage container, homing in on Simmer and sending him soaring into the blue teleporter.

“Oh, BUUUUUUUUUUCK!” Simmer yelled, flailing as he hit the blue teleporter and immediately emerged from the orange one. Tempest was waiting right there to grab him, flip him over her head, and buck him across the room.

Because of course she was.

“That was awesome—OW!” Tucker exclaimed as he flew over the container, only for Simmer to collide with him in mid-air and send both of them to the ground in a painful heap.

“Lesson five – always watch for friendly fire.” Tempest said, far too happily.

Jess sighed and sank back in her seat, rubbing her forehead. It was times like these that made Jess wonder just HOW these goofballs had been so successful on all their previous missions. Even before she and Wash had joined the squad, they had always done extremely well in the field. But anytime they were in a training environment, things just didn’t seem to click.

Maybe I should just end this now. They haven’t had any luck so far…But they are all together now, save for Church, so maybe things will change? Sparrow still wants to learn how they’ve been so successful, so maybe they just need a bit more time to find their momentum. Plus, I still need to gather more info on how Tempest tries to teach others.

…Ok, I’ll give them another fifteen minutes unless something goes truly wrong. Then I’ll end it if they haven’t found their groove.

Meanwhile, next to her, Caboose was tapping his hooves together, clearly still trying to figure out how exactly he could help his teammates. Suffice to say, it wasn’t going well.

“Can we use turrets on her? Or some exploding fiery things?” he asked hopefully. Jess just shook her head.

“No, Caboose. You only have access to the crane controls and the cameras,” she said, pointing at the buttons on the console. “That’s it. I explained the controls to you when you first came in here, remember? It’s up to you to figure out how you can use that to help your team.”

Caboose pouted, then looked back at the console and hit a big blue button. For some unexplained reason, the sound of a confetti cannon sounded somewhere nearby, though Jess had no idea where. Freckles wasn’t even deployed right now, and she knew that none of the buttons were supposed to do that.

Oh, what the hay. It was Caboose.

Jess brushed it off and turned back to the cameras. On the floor of the facility, the Reds and Tucker all staggered back to their hooves. She could tell from their pained groaning that they were sore, and the looks of worry on their faces told her that they knew this wasn’t over yet.

“I certainly hope that isn’t the best you can do,” Tempest taunted, sounding almost giddy. “I have so many more lessons to teach.”

Jess definitely needed to have a word with Tempest after this. Maybe several. She was clearly having WAY too much fun with all of this.

“What do we do, Sarge?” Grind Stone asked almost drunkenly, looking around in a panic. He patted frantically at his armor, and it took Jess a second to realize he was missing now both his weapons.

Interesting. Let’s see what Mr. Lazy Bones does now.

“Don’t know. I’ve never hit a girl in my life!” Sarge exclaimed in concern, readying his cannon and pointing it towards Tempest as she stalked towards them.

“Yeah, I noticed. TRY HARDER!” Simmer squeaked, his legs shaking even harder as he aimed his rocket weapon. Tucker grunted and deployed his sword again, taking a fighting stance. Grind Stone, apparently giving up on locating either of his weapons, elected to grab a nearby traffic cone and hold it at the ready with a loud “HAH!”

Right…They store some of the construction materials down here too. Of course…

Jess facehooved again as Tempest laughed and charged forward.

Jess could only compare what happened next to watching a dancer in motion. Tempest dodged another blast from Sarge’s magic cannon, snatched it out of his grasp, and kicked him away. Tucker tried to follow up with a stab, only to be kicked in the face and smacked with the cannon. Simmer tried to fire another rocket, but Tempest easily leaned back, the breeze from the rocket gently blowing her mane.

“What the bu—” Simmer began, only for Tempest to kick him in the chest, sending him flying back through a teleporter as she turned back and aimed Sarge’s weapon at the terrified Grind Stone.

“—UUUUUUUUUUCK!” Simmer cried as he flew out of one teleporter on top of a nearby container, landed in another one, and then flew out of THAT one and slammed into Grind Stone’s back. The orange pony staggered forward with his cone, and Tempest leaped in, kicked him in the face so hard he was knocked onto his back, and landed on his chest with Sarge’s cannon now pointed directly at Grind Stone’s face.

“Ha-how,” Grind Stone groaned in pain, only to squeak as he noticed the cannon.

“Lesson six. Enemies can be projectiles too if you try hard enough,” Tempest said, arming the stolen weapon with a menacing click-click.

“Oh no! Grind Stone!” Simmer called in a panic, but he had been thrown clear in the shuffle and Jess knew there was nothing he could do in time.

“Bye-bye!” Tempest exclaimed as she pulled the trigger.

“Yipe!” Grind Stone shrieked.

But the cannon didn’t fire. Instead, it let out an anticlimactic clicking noise.

Tempest and Grind Stone both blinked in surprise. Jess felt her right eye starting to twitch.

Did Sarge run out of ammo in the middle of a fight? AGAIN? Why wouldn’t he bring more? I told them to pack as if they were going into a situation where they could only use ammo crystals, so why …Wait, don’t tell me.

“Private Grind Stone! You should be ashamed of yourself!” Sarge shouted as Jess watched Tempest try to figure out why the weapon wouldn’t fire, even going so far at to point the barrel at her own face and look down it like it had personally betrayed her. “We’ve run out of ammo crystals AGAIN! THAT’S YOUR RESPONSIBILITY!”

I knew it.

I would say I’m surprised.

But I’m not.

“Why is HE, the LAZIEST PONY IN THE SQUAD, in charge of THAT!?” Tempest asked incredulously. “Especially if this has already happened MULTIPLE TIMES! That only makes it worse!”

She was, however, ignored by the ponies on the floor (save for Tucker, who still looked so stunned that Jess wasn’t sure he was aware of ANYTHING right now) as Grind Stone just let out a relieved laugh.

“Huh, I guess this is the first time my laziness would have actually saved my—LIFE!” he squeaked as Tempest firmly planted a leg on his stomach and held the cannon above her head like a golf club. His eyes went wide and he began to desperately flail around under Tempest.

Why do I have a bad feeling about this? Jess thought to herself.

“FOOORRRREEEEEEE!” Tempest yelled, grinning like a loon as she lined up the shot with Grind Stone’s side.

“PROTECT ME, CONE!” Grind Stone yelled, holding his traffic cone above his head as he thrashed. But the cone could do nothing as Tempest swung downwards. And unfortunately, at the last possible second, Grind’s last panicked flail caused his body to shift heavily to the right and the butt of the cannon slammed between his legs rather than his side, sending him flying off and crashing into Simmer.

“Watch it!” Simmer cried as the two tumbled.

“YOU watch it!” Grind Stone retorted, his voice at least three pitches higher than normal.

OH FOR—If that wasn’t clearly an accident, I would end this fight here and now! Jess all but screamed in her mind as she let out an exasperated groan. She hit the button to unmute the microphone, only to think better of it and release the button again. The only thing that made her feel slightly better was that Tempest was clearly frustrated with herself at the incident.

Jess could see the discomfort and self-anger in Tempest’s eyes as she looked between Grind Stone and the cannon before throwing the weapon away in disgust. She then vigorously shook her head and took a few deep, quick breaths. Jess had been her parole officer long enough to tell that Tempest was trying to recenter herself.

I wonder what she’s thinking, Jess thought. Tempest is clearly a bit shaken by that accident, but it looks like she is trying to get back into it. Will she dial back her attacks now? She eyed the button that would end the training simulation. She debated hitting it, before groaning and shaking her head in exasperation. The last hit was an accident, and she needed to see how Tempest altered her fighting style given what just occurred (or, more importantly, if she DIDN’T alter her fighting style). That didn’t stop her from doublechecking the safety spell readouts to make sure they were set at the correct levels.

Still, the fact that Jess was the one overseeing this whole training session, and had been the one to approve it, led to a knot of guilt forming in her chest. She owed Grind Stone an apology after all this. He may be the most irritating lazy bum Jess had ever met, but everything about this training session had turned into a huge mess and that wasn’t right. She also would definitely need to retake charge of his training personally once this was all over, as clearly Tempest’s style (if it could be called that) didn’t mesh well with his character.

I don’t know how well THAT’S going to work, given how much trouble I had training him in the past, but clearly this current arrangement is even worse than anything I had with him. At least the safety spells look to be holding steady.

“You idiots! Let me show you how it’s done!” Sarge exclaimed dramatically, pulling Jess back to the camera feeds. He had his hooves up in a fighting stance, but for whatever reason, he was putting all his attention on the crumpled forms of Grind Stone and Simmer and COMPLETELY ignoring Tempest even as she clanked her way towards him. The moment he turned, he received an armored hoof to his helmet’s faceshield, which sent him flying gracefully through the air down to join his team.

“Nice demonstration, Sarge,” Grind Stone said. Jess could practically feel the sarcasm dripping in his tone as the orange pony staggered back to his hooves.

“Oh, shut up,” Sarge grumbled.

“Ok, I feel better now. I’m ready to keep fighting,” Tempest sighed as she cracked her neck, clearly feeling a bit better. Jess groaned at the red team’s shenanigans, though out of the corner of her eye she could see Tucker climbing back to his hooves.

She could also see Caboose hit a large green button, causing a large container to slowly move over Tucker and Tempest.

Interesting. I want to see what the Reds and Blues do next. They have a good opportunity here.

“Hey guys, look up there,” Simmer whispered, pointing to the box. Tucker, who finally managed to pull himself together, looked up and immediately had an expression on his face that just screamed ‘I have a horrible idea, but it might just work.’

“Hey Caboose!” he yelled. “Remember when I said not to help me? Forget that! I need you to help me! RIGHT NOW!”

Oh dear.

“What holds up that crate!?” Caboose asked Jess excitedly, looking over the console.

“The crane controls are on the left side of the console,” Jess said, leaning forward, actually curious if this would work or not. Tempest WAS pretty strong, and while the enchantments in the room would protect her regardless, would it be enough to let her keep fighting if the crate hit her?

Caboose took a quick look at her, outright giggled, and began hitting every possible button on the left side of the console.

CLANK!

The crane released, and the large rectangular container dropped. Tucker dove out of the way just as Tempest saw what was happening.

“Oh, for Harmony’s SAKE!” Tempest screamed as the container plummeted towards her.

THUNK!

“I can’t believe that worked!” Tucker cried in what Jess could only describe as joy-at-no-longer-at-risk-of-being-punched, sliding to a stop, only to turn and see something no pony was expecting. Something that had even Jess’s jaw falling open in surprise.

Tempest had caught the container, not only with her hooves, but also with her MAGIC!

Jess quickly swapped one of the cameras to the ground-level one, giving her a clear view of the almost-pinned Tempest. The purple mare’s eyes had become pure blue, like the lightning sparking all over the container and her body, and her horn was glowing like a miniature sun. She was forced into a kneeling position, her face only inches from the floor, but Jess took a quick glance at the health monitor and Tempest was completely unhurt.

“Heck. Yeah,” Tempest grunted, slowly standing back up. She hefted the container up with both her hooves and her magic, and once it was higher, Jess could see that the unicorn had left a massive dent in the side.

Tempest’s mouth was pulled into a strained grin as she stared at Tucker proudly. “Now. We’re. Talking.”

“Oh buck, that didn’t work!” Tucker exclaimed, frantically jumping up in a clear panic.

“I’m actually surprised that DIDN’T work,” Jess admitted to herself. Caboose wasn’t listening; he looked wholly captivated with the sparking lightning flying all around Tempest. “She just used magic for the first time last night. I know Tempest is a bit of a badass, but I didn’t expect her magic to be this strong so soon after recovering her abilities. Maybe that was just the crack in the wall she needed to break through and use all of her potential.”

Could it be that the danger of the container dropping on her triggered a magic surge? Or could it be something else? Tempest did say that she used to use a lot of magic at once to fire her lightning bolts. Could she struggle with smaller tasks but excel at full magic casting? I should have Doc look into this.

“Hey, Tucker!” Tempest yelled, pulling Jess back just in time to see the magenta unicorn’s strained face twisting into a manic smile. “CATCH!”

With a powerful shout, her magic and physical strength came together to fling the massive crate at the aqua stallion and the Red team crowded against the wall behind him.

Come on, Tucker. You know what to do here.

“We gotta get outta here!” Grind Stone screamed in terror, frantically looking for a way out of the dead end they were trapped in.

“We’ll be crushed!” Simmer cried.

“Don’t worry, guys!” Tucker exclaimed, deploying his sword. “I got this!”

The weapon in his hoof glowed aqua and doubled in length almost immediately, and just as the box was about to reach them, he swung forward with a loud ‘SWISH!’

A massive blue-green wave of energy emerged from the sword and perfectly sliced the box in half.

Perfect. Well done, Tucker…Wait, what?

Tucker smirked and gave his sword a little twirl, but his celebration was cut short by a number of pained cries. The container had been full of, ironically enough, med kits. Med kits which now completely buried the Reds as they spilled out of the container.

Jess winced, just a little this time. That was just bad luck, but Tucker was getting quite a lot better at controlling his founder’s weapon. Six months ago, that move would have only been half its current size.

“We were crushed,” Grind Stone moaned, poking his head up from beneath a mountain of kits, his eyes rolling in opposite directions.

“Oh, blueberries,” Tucker muttered. “Tempest, can you please—OW!”

He turned to face Tempest, only for the somehow-not-exhausted unicorn to kick him in the chest and keep walking. HOW she wasn’t exhausted to the point where she couldn’t move was beyond Jess, but she could have Doc look into that later too.

“Focus, Tucker! Lesson seven! The enemy isn’t going to give you a break just because you pull off a flashy move!” she said, and to Jess’s surprise, she nodded as Tucker recovered his balance and glared at her.

Is Tempest actually impressed with him?

“All right, you know what, that’s it. Come here!” Tucker grunted, charging Tempest.

Meanwhile, on another monitor, Jess saw Simmer emerge from behind the cut container piece. “Oh, thank Harmony, I thought I was a goner,” he exhaled, running over and beginning to look through the piles of med kits. “Sarge, where are you?”

“Here!” Sarge exclaimed, bursting out of a heap of med kits with one perfectly speared on his horn. “What happened? I feel defeated, and yet inexplicably rejuvenated!”

Why does he sound so happy about that?

Grind Stone rolled his eyes, and Jess was sorely tempted to do the same.

She turned back to the first monitor, where Tucker was trying to land a hit on Tempest. Unfortunately, he wasn’t having much success.

“Swish—gah!” he yelled, swinging his sword, only for Tempest to dodge and deliver two quick punches to his ribs.

“Return to your stance faster! Don’t leave yourself open!” Tempest chided.

“Swish—ow!” Tucker tried a reverse swing, only for the same result.

“Don’t stop if it leaves your back open to the enemy! Follow through, or even spin to get back into a defensible position!”

“STAB!” He thrust his sword at Tempest, but she dodged and grabbed his leg. “Harmony damn it!” She twisted his leg behind his back, grabbed the weapon, and delivered a kick to his faceplate, disarming him.

I wonder if she could teach me that move, Jess thought, though she couldn’t help but wince at the same time.

“Oh come on!” Tucker yelled as he was knocked across the floor face-first, sliding past the reds and flipping directly into a teleporter. “This is ridiculous!”

“Whoa, did you see that?” Grind Stone exclaimed in shock.

“How would I have missed that?” Simmer asked in pure deadpan as he picked the magic launcher device back up and reequipped it.

Back across the room, Tucker stumbled out of the portal, his armor and fur now covered in strange black and dark purple splotches. But before he could try to regain his balance, Tempest was there, catching him by the throat with one hoof and holding the sword with the other.

However, before she could attack, the sword powered down and vanished.

“Huh? I thought all weapons could be used by anypony in this training?” Tempest asked.

“The founders’ weapons don’t apply to that rule,” Jess said over the loudspeaker. “They aren’t affected by that spell. I told you that before we started, and during the opening announcement.”

“Oh, right,” Tempest groaned, and Jess was pretty sure she would have facehoofed if she wasn’t still holding Tucker by the neck. Speaking of said (mostly) greenish-blue pony, Jess saw a smirk play across his lips that let her know that he was about to say something monumentally stupid.

Tucker, please don—

“What’s the matter, Tempest? Having trouble keeping it up? Don’t worry, it happens to everypony. Well, not me but—"

Jess’s eye twitched.

He just…I can’t EVEN! Did he learn nothing from Wash!?

Jess was so flabbergasted at his stupidity that she couldn’t muster the will to chastise Tucker for his stupidity, or even move, for that matter. However, after a minute, she felt somepony’s hoof grab her own. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a confused Caboose grabbing her left forehoof, before he gently brought it to her face in the perfect motion of a facehoof. The fact that he looked at her like a puppy begging for a treat did make her grin a little, at least.

“Thank you, Caboose,” she said from behind the hoof, earning a happy smile from the blue pony before he went back to hitting all the buttons on the control panel. Somewhere out on the floor, a slide whistle sounded.

Jess wasn’t even going to question it this time.

As Jess brought her hoof down, she could see Tempest’s eyes light up in understanding.

“Oh, you PERVERTED little—” she growled.

Tucker flinched, and Jess could clearly see that he realized his mistake.

Whatever comes next is your own dang fault, Tucker.

Meanwhile, the Reds, clearly in no hurry to be thoroughly thrashed again, simply watched as Tempest began to beat up Tucker. Well, Grind Stone and Simmer watched. Sarge, however, had that look he always had when he was assessing the battlefield. As he scanned the area, his eyes locked onto the launcher Simmer was carrying, then at Tempest, and then back again. His face lit up in excitement.

“Hey, that launcher one of the modified versions, right?”

“Oh, yeah, I think it is. I didn’t even notice that,” Simmer admitted, poking around at the green band on the launcher.

“Ow, OW, HEY, DON’T—OW!” Tucker shouted, prompting Jess to check back in on the camera watching him. She winced.

“LESSON EIGHT! DON’T TAUNT AN ENEMY WHO HAS YOU BY THE THROAT!!!” Tempest yelled angrily.

“Tempest, I’m pretty sure legs aren’t supposed to bend that way! I know Tucker’s not injured like Grind Stone, but keep it to normal punishments, please! I don’t care how much he was asking for it!”

“Understood!” Tempest yelled up, before resuming her beatdown with a fair bit less intensity – which was, unfortunately, still WAY too intense for Tucker.

“And that means it has heat seeking!” Sarge exclaimed in glee, pulling Jess back to the Red’s monitor just in time to see the red pony smiling widely.

“OW, come on, can’t you take a jok—OW!”

Jess checked the other monitor quickly, shook her head, and turned her attention back to the Reds.

Wash tried to teach you why your jokes were a bad idea, Tucker. You should have listened.

“Now, lock on and let her rip!”

“Oh, right, I forgot about that,” Simmer said.

“Holy Harmony, OW, you can’t do this—” Tucker said, before he was cut off and the Reds turned to see him get thrown bodily out of the teleporter.

“—iiiiiich!” he finished as he fell to the floor with a loud clang, coughing as he looked at himself. By now, his armor was now completely black and his fur was now completely dark purple. “Darn it, I hate this black stuff, what the hay is it!?”

I don’t think even Sparrow could answer that question, Tucker. Nor could he explain why it only happens to you.

“There she is!” Grind Stone cried, pointing at the discolored Tucker.

Jess’s eyes widened in surprise. Wait, what? Do they actually think that he’s—

“Huh?” Tucker asked, looking up.

“Get her!” Sarge yelled.

He and Grind Stone charged at Tucker while Simmer hung back, looking from his teammates to the pegasus and back again in pure confusion. Meanwhile, Jess tried not to walk over and slam her entire head into the console Caboose was still playing with. It took WAY more effort than it should have.

“Wait, guys…” Simmer tried to interject, but Grind Stone and Sarge were already whaling on Tucker, who cowered and tried to block their blows. Needless to say, he didn’t do very well.

Tempest, meanwhile, was just watching all of this happen from near the other teleporter, and Jess could tell that she was trying not to laugh. She wasn’t doing very well either.

“OW, come on! I’m not Tempest, I’m a Blue!” Tucker cried, curling in on himself. “I’m not the one we’re all fighting! Leave me alone!”

But the only relief he got was Grind Stone quickly tiring himself out.

Note to self, said Jess’s rational brain, somewhere under all the noise of ‘how on EQUIS did we get HERE?’ the rest of her brain was currently screaming, work to make sure these idiots can recognize their own teammates! Also, develop a new plan to continue working to improve Grind Stone’s stamina.

“Kicking is hard,” the orange stallion muttered. “Why did we need to run so much today if it was just going to tire us out for this stupid exercise?”

Unfortunately, with Grind Stone out of the way, Sarge had the room to grab Tucker, pull him into a headlock, and then begin punching him repeatedly.

“Why are you hitting me, I’m not Tempest!” Tucker yelled as he tried to get free. The real Tempest, meanwhile, was now covering her mouth to muffle her giggles. Jess just groaned.

“Sarge, hold on, hold on!” Simmer yelled, prompting the older stallion to look up at him in confusion. “That’s Tucker, not Tempest! He a pegasus, remember?”

“See, I told you! How’d you miss that I don’t have a horn?” Tucker yelled, earning one more punch from Sarge before he let go. “Ow, why did you do that!?”

“Meh, force o’ habit.”

WHY is that a force of habit? That is the first time you’ve ever managed to get Tucker into a headlock! IT CAN’T BE A HABIT IF IT’S NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE!

“Man, you stallions need to foc—whoa, whoa,” Tucker began, only to stumble on a med kid and lurch backwards into Grind Stone.

“Hey, watch it—whoa, whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa!” Grind Stone called out, staggering back until he finally managed to catch Tucker. “Careful, don’t fall in the…uh.”

Somehow, the two of them had managed to end up balancing perfectly on their hind hooves over the orange teleporter Tucker had been thrown through a minute before. “Hold still, hold still, umm,” Grind Stone muttered, looking around wildly.

Jess could tell that he was looking for Tempest and could spot the moment when he caught sight of her across the training area. Tempest, meanwhile, turned from the boys’ struggle to the blue teleporter next to her.

Oh boy, Jess thought as she saw a faint smile appear on Tempest’s lips as she walked over towards the teleporter.

“I can see her! She’s over there, all the way over there!” Grind Stone called out, pulling Jess’s attention back to the two struggling stallions. “We have time to get out of this!"

“Are you suuuuure?” Tempest asked casually as her head and shoulders emerged below the two precariously balanced stallions.

Maybe I should add a teleporter safety lesson to Tempest’s training. You’re not supposed to remain partially in them like that for too long in case something malfunctions.

“Uh-oh,” Grind Stone squeaked. His expression screamed ‘This will not end well.’

“Grind Stone, I see her,” Tucker whispered. However, before either stallion could do anything, Sarge leapt forward and tried to punch Tempest. Unfortunately for Grind Stone, Tempest simply ducked back through the portal, leaving Sarge’s hoof to connect squarely with the orange stallion’s groin.

This time Jess did face-console. This hit wasn’t Tempest’s fault, but holy Harmony did she feel bad for Grind Stone.

Should I end the session? Jess thought. There’s only five minutes left, but they still haven’t come close to beating Tempest or truly coordinating their efforts, save for Tucker dropping the crate on her. And the injuries are escalating, both for Tucker and for Grind Stone. But Simmer did find the extra feature on the magic launcher.

…Ok, I’ll give them a chance to use he heat seeking missile, then I’ll end it if it fails.

“NOT MY FAULT!” Tempest yelled, her voice tinged with both concern and a slight hint of amusement.

“Hey, that’s my line!” Caboose yelled, sounding very happy that somepony else had said that for once. Jess looked over and saw his hoof on the loudspeaker button. “Now say ‘Tucker did it!”

“TUCKER DID IT!” Tempest yelled.

Jess face-consoled again.

And now Caboose knows where the loudspeaker button is. This will only end well.

“What is the universe’s problem with my balls!?” Grind Stone cried in miserable pain. Jess raised her head just in time to see the orange stallion cover his groin and flop into the teleporter. This, of course, left Tucker by himself, and despite his panicked flailing and flapping of his wings, he was no luckier and fell back into the teleporter as well and into Tempest’s waiting hooves.

Before Tucker could even begin to catch his balance, Tempest caught him around the waist and lifted him up. “SUPLEX!” she cried, slamming Tucker to the metal floor, before flipping over his downed body, pinning him with her hind legs, and proceeding to punch him repeatedly. Again.

It wasn’t a standard combat tactic, but it wasn’t really outside the rules either. Jess groaned, but elected to let Tempest continue unless it got out of hoof again.

“OW, right to the mount huh? OW, not even gonna buy me dinner first? OW, I like your OW style!” Tucker quipped, trying to use his forelegs to block Tempest’s blows, but his sassy commentary was clearly making Tempest punch all the harder.

Jess couldn’t be sure if this was actually some sort of insane plan by Tucker at this point. Because if it was, she failed to see how it was helping at all.

“Shut! UP! ALREADY!” Tempest yelled between punches.

Case and point.

Jess tore her eyes away from the unfortunate sight to check on the other Reds. Simmer had engaged his launcher’s targeting system, the magic reticle hovering just in front of his face, but for some reason he hadn’t fired yet.

“Simmer, what are you waiting for!?” Sarge exclaimed, clearly frustrated.

“They look the same!” Simmer responded in fear, the targeting reticle quickly jumping back and forth as if trying to choose a target. “Which one do I shoot!?”

“OW! SHOOT THE ONE WHO’S WINNING, YOU IDIOT!” Tucker yelled.

It IS always better to air on the side of caution to avoid harming your own allies, Jess noted, nodding thoughtfully. Now we just need to increase Simmer’s confidence in himself and his ability to tell his allies from his enemies in stressful situations. Even if this should be a REALLY easy choice.

Unfortunately, before he could do that, Grind Stone staggered into the shot, still cradling his crotch.

“Grind Stone!” Simmer yelled. “Watch it!”

“Huuuuh?” Grind Stone muttered, clearly still a bit out of it.

Oh for…really? Just really? I don’t even know what to say at this point.

Tempest looked up at the commotion, and her lip curled back in concentration. She kicked Tucker at the orange stallion, knocking him back towards the other Reds. However, before Tucker could get too far away, Tempest grabbed him by the leg, pulled him back towards her and, in a move that Jess swore moved in slow motion, punched the pegasus in mid-air. The hit was so strong that all of the black mess covering Tucker cleared off in a puff as the aqua stallion bounced painfully behind Simmer.

I’m starting to think Tempest’s love of dramatic moves might just match Tucker’s love of sassy catchphrases.

“Wow, she knocked that stuff right off you!” Sarge said, sounding impressed.

“Oww, that wasn’t worth it,” Tucker groaned, slowly getting back up.

“You’re all clear, Simmer!” Sarge yelled. “NOW SHOOT HER!”

FINALLY! The goofballs actually have an advantage! Don’t waste it, you guys! I know you can get at least one good hit in!

Tempest saw what they were about to do and quickly turned to run.

“FIRE IN THE HOLE!” Simmer screamed, pulling the trigger and sending a red magic projectile quickly homing in on Tempest.

“Oh, you want to play? Well then, LET’S PLAY!” Tempest yelled, jumping at the teleporter in front of her. She grabbed the frame as she passed, swinging herself out of the companion teleporter on the floor, and she hit the ground running. The rocket followed her, and Tempest wheeled around, charging right at the Reds and Blues. “SHARING IS CARING!” she cackled.

She is having way too much fun right now. I need to make sure she tones it down if I have her train with the Reds and Blues again. Though at this point, that likely won’t be for quite a long time.

“Are you freaking kidding me!?” Tucker cried in a panic. “RUN!!!”

He spun on his hooves, trying to run, only to bump into Simmer, who in turn smacked Sarge in the face with his projectile launcher.

Jess facehoofed again, but that didn’t stop her from seeing Tempest grin viciously as the guys staggered about. While Jess didn’t know exactly what she was thinking, some part of Tempest’s expression just screamed ‘It’s time to show them my moves!’

“Here’s a shout out to that old griffon, General Falcon!” she laughed, leaping onto her hind hooves as she kept moving forward. “FALCON—” She smashed one forehoof into another — “PUNCH!!!”

She delivered a brutal punch to all three stallions at the same time, knocking them clean over. Only Grind Stone escaped this brutal blow, and Tempest slid right between his legs as he staggered back.

I wonder if she can teach me that move…

“Huh?” Grind Stone said, looking up to see the missile coming right for him.

Uh oh.

“DON’T JUST STAND THERE! DODGE! ROLL! JUMP! DO SOMETHING!” Tempest yelled as she sprinted away.

But Grind Stone didn’t move. He only screamed in panic, “Oh Harmony, NOT LIKE THIS!”

Nononononono—I do NOT want Grind Stone to be out of commission for weeks! Tempest, I swear if that rocket hits him where I think it will—

Grind Stone covered his crotch in preparation for pain. However, in an insane piece of luck, the projectile flew neatly between his legs without going off. Grind Stone blinked, then sagged like a sack of potatoes. “OH, thank Harmony. I thought I was…”

Jess turned to the next monitor just in time to see Tempest jump into another teleporter on the ground.

Leaving the rocket to collide with a large pile of explosive magic barrels!

Oh, for the LOVE OF—

“BUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!” Grind Stone yelled as he and the rest of the stallions tried to run. It was all for naught, however, as the rapid set of chain explosions engulfed the four stallions, launching them all into the air in violent and dramatic fashion. The control room shook from the impact, and at least half of the cameras flickered with static.

Meanwhile, Tempest safely rolled out of the teleporter in view of one of the unaffected cameras just in time to see the fireworks, watching as Simmer, Sarge, and Tucker crash to the ground near her.

Jess peeked at the health monitors and let out a sigh. The guys were all fine - aches, bruises, and massive cases of damaged morale, but fine – which was a relief, but she could tell from their moaning and groaning that they were out of the fight for the time being. Tempest stood above them, smirking and dusting off her hooves.

“Another job well done,” she said proudly, before blinking and looking around. Then she tilted her head in confusion. “Wait. What happened to Grind Stone? Hey, Jess, where’s Mister Lazy?”

“I…don’t know?” Jess called back, looking at the cameras. She couldn’t see Grind Stone on any of them. Most of them had cleared up now that the explosion was over, but a few had completely malfunctioned and were full of static. And she couldn’t see or hear anything from outside the control room’s window either. “I can’t locate him. I think he got hit with a barrel, but I lost track of him in the explosion. The protective spells haven’t alerted me that anypony has been teleported to the med bay, so he should still be on the floor.”

“Well, clearly not—” Tempest began.

CRUNCH!

Out of nowhere, Grind Stone fell from the sky and landed squarely on a cement divider being stored on the floor.

Crotch first.

Just like yesterday.

WHY!? WHAT ARE THE FLIPPING CHANCES OF THAT HAPPENING!?

“EEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! WHY WON’T THE UNIVERSE JUST KILL ME!?” he wailed, falling off the block and onto the floor.

“Grind Stone!” Simmer gasped in shock, trying to sit up only to fall back down in exhaustion.

“Where did that divider even come from?” Tucker groaned, trying to stand and failing horribly.

“So beautiful,” Sarge said softly, laying contently on the ground as he smiled.

Jess buried her face in her forelegs, barely managing to contain her frustrated scream. Her whole body started to tremble and massive spike of guilt stabbed at her chest.

I should have followed my gut and ended this earlier!

“Why is Grindy’s screen all red?” Caboose asked, pulling Jess’s eyes over to the medical screen. Red warnings were flashing wildly on the screen as the emergency teleport rapidly charged and an alert was automatically sent to the med bay.

“Oh BUCK! THAT WAS NOT MY INTENTION WHEN I JUMPED IN THE TELEPORTER! What are the chances of that even happening!? I swear I didn’t mean for that to happen!” Tempest exclaimed in shock. “There is no way I could have known!”

Thankfully, as the teleport spell kicked in and warped the sobbing Grind Stone away to the medical wing. Jess could feel her heart rate increasing as the health spells analyzed his injuries, her leg twitching nervously as the progress bar filled the screen far too slowly.

Please let him be ok. Please don’t tell me…

The health screen let out a small ping and the initial analysis popped onto the screen. Scanning it rapidly, Jess could feel herself letting out a breath she didn’t even know she was holding. The spells indicated that Grind Stone’s injuries were non-life threatening and that he did not appear to be at risk of any permanent damage. The protections spells had held together even through the technical glitches. “Thankfully, according to the health spells, Grind Stone doesn’t appear to have any permanent damage,” she announced over the loudspeaker. She could see everypony on the floor relax a bit at the news, Simmer especially, and the guilt in her chest receded ever-so-slightly at the news.

“Oh, thank Harmony. I mean, it IS Grind Stone, so I shouldn’t be too surprised given how I KNOW he can take a beating, but still,” Simmer said, his voice flooded with relief.

“Lucky lazybones,” Sarge muttered just loud enough for the cameras to pick up on.

Tucker huffed out a laugh at that, and Simmer swatted at him with his free hoof, but he was a bit too far away from the pegasus and way too tired to even try sitting up, so his hoof just clipped the edge of Tucker’s armor instead with a weak ‘herg.’ Tucker laughed harder, which then turned into a laugh-slash-strained-groan as his battered body moved too much, and Sarge let out a loud snort.

Jess let them blow off steam for another minute, taking deep breaths and shaking her head to try and regain her focus. It helped, a bit, but not as much as it usually did, and her eyes kept flitting back to Tempest, who was standing awkwardly away from the guys and shifting her weight from one leg to the other.

Clearly, this fight was over, so Jess began to pull up the systems that would disable all the spells that were covering the room. There were a lot of them though, so it would take a few minutes for the system to prepare them all for deactivation. She also sent a quick request to the medical wing for more detailed info on Grind Stone’s injuries. In the meantime, she turned back to the floor.

“I’ll handle training with Grind Stone from now on, Tempest,” Jess said firmly over the intercom. Tempest practically jumped out of her armor and snapped to attention, and an odd, slightly nauseated sensation churned in Jess’s stomach. She took another deep breath before she continued. “Accident or not, you and Grind Stone clearly do NOT work well together. Furthermore, we will hold off on you leading anymore exercises on your own until we can make sure you are ready for the responsibility. No exceptions. For now, just hang tight. I’m going to begin the spell shutdown procedure.”

And I need to apologize to Grind Stone for all of this nonsense. Even if there is no permanent damage, I did put him into a fight with Tempest before both of them were ready. And I was the one to give up on training him in the first place. That’s on me for not sticking with it and working to get him ready for this.

I have to make this right. Somehow.

Meanwhile, Tempest just nodded in response to Jess’s scolding. “Yeah, that might be for the best,” she said, a slight tremor in her voice. “I’m just gonna walk around a little bit…if that’s ok. Try and clear my head a little, let the adrenaline burn off a little bit,” Tempest said, sighing as she began to walk away from the downed stallions.

“That’s fine, but stay within sight of the control tower. Everyone can take a few minutes to calm down, and we debrief everypony once the spells are deactivated before we end for the day.” Jess said, silently wishing she could take a few minutes to go walking as she tried to figure out just what she was going to say to everypony. Unfortunately, she had to keep an eye on Caboose and the spell shutdown progress. She also didn’t want to leave in case an update on Grind Stone’s condition came in.

What AM I going to say? Sorry for putting you in a fight none of you were ready for, including Tempest? Don’t lose hope just because this was a disaster? I know what we need to work on, so all this pain was worth it? I know we NEEDED to run this training exercise both for the boys and for Tempest, but that still doesn’t make dealing with the fallout any easier.

Wait. Wait wait wait. Hold on. I’m forgetting something. I KNOW I am. But what is it. Tempest was fighting Simmer, Grind Stone, Sarge, Tucker—WAIT! What the hey happened to C—

“Hey, Tempest,” a new voice casually called out.

Something flew in from off camera and collided with the side of Tempest’s head, and Jess could see from her wince that this was the first bit of pain she had felt this entire match. Tempest quickly turned to see…a golden tinted metal head?

Church!?

WHERE THE HECK HAVE YOU BEEN!?

Blinking in confusion, Tempest looked up to see the ghostly form of Church standing there, smiling as his weapon floated in his magic. “Why don’t you pick on somepony your own size?”

BRO, YOU ARE LITERALLY SHORTER THAN TEMPEST! What is it with you and Tucker making these ridiculous quips that don’t make any sense in context!? But you know what? You’re a ghost, so go ahead and fight Tempest while the system finish its preparations for the shutdown! It’s not like she’ll be able to hurt you anyway! Don’t get yourself into trouble in the meantime!

Thirty seconds later…

CLONK.

“OW!”

CLONK.

“OOOWW!”

CLONK!

“THIS SHOULDN’T BE PHYSICALLY POSSIBL—”

CLONK!

“OW, Tempest, STOP! You are embarrassing me!” Church cried as, against all laws of physics, Tempest continued to beat his ghostly form into submission with his own head. Having grown up with her brother being a ‘ghost’ for most of his life, in Jess’s professional opinion, this really, REALLY shouldn’t have been physically possible given how Church was intangible in his ‘ghost’ form. Yet Tempest was, somehow, managing to hold ghost-him by the neck as she used Church’s head as a bludgeon.

How that invincibility working out for you little bro? Jess thought with a small giggle. I always warned you that somepony might find a way to fight you in your ghost form, but you never listened. She could see the rest of his body discarded nearby, so he must have specifically left it so he could use his head as a projectile. Which, in this case, left him open to a beatdown by Tempest.

“Where even were you this entire fight!? I just spent twenty minutes showing your team how a Storm Warrior fights AND YOU MISSED ALL OF IT!” Tempest yelled in frustration, delivering another blow with the head.

“OW! I split up from Tucker to try and sneak around the outer edge of the room! And I stashed my body nearby so I could move through the floor and the wall to avoid being seen, but I never heard Sis announce that we were actually fighting, so I thought I still had time to finish the exercise! I didn’t know we were fighting until I saw the explosion!” Church yelled, trying to avoid another clonk from the head. “Just let go already!”

“No way, keep hitting him!” Tucker yelled from where he and the Reds were resting after their ordeal. “He needs to get beaten up too!”

“Hey, Sis! A little help here!?” Church yelled to Jess, who was still in the control center watching this very one-sided fight continue. Thankfully, at that exact moment, Jess’s screen lit up to signify that the system was ready to disable all the active spells.

“All right, that’s enough,” Jess announced, letting Caboose hit the large red button he had been eyeing since the beginning of the match. A loud buzzer sounded throughout the facility, followed by a series of small flashes as all the safety spells deactivated. “Training is over. Tempest, you can stop beating my brother with his own head now.” Tempest paused, then grunted in disappointment. Thankfully, she did release the ghostly Church. She also gave him back his head, which Church quickly reattached to the discarded body nearby before phasing into it.

Note to self, again: bring up this strange flaw in Church’s body to Sparrow. The last thing we need is an enemy realizing that Church is vulnerable to being beaten by his own head. And, perhaps more importantly, have someone perform an investigation into Tempest’s magic. Between not burning herself out lifting that crate and now this unusual ability to grab intangible things, clearly something has changed in how her magic works. Her interaction with Church could be a sign that her anima magic is starting to develop. On the other hoof, her not being burned out could be a sign that her standard magic operates under an ‘all or nothing’ effect, which could give her some resistance to burnout. We need investigate to find out just what is happening with her.

“Ow, my jaw’s gonna feel weird for weeks!” Church complained, rubbing it with a hoof.

“Quit whining,” Tucker said. “You didn’t even get blown up!”

“All right, that’s enough,” Jess called out, exiting the command center and flying down to where the assembled ponies were waiting. She swallowed hard and lifted her head high, falling back into ‘drill instructor’ mode and pushing away her concerns and guilt for the moment. I can deal with everything myself in a few minutes. Right now, I to be strong and clear.

“It’s evident that you all need to seriously improve your fighting skills if this training exercise was any indication. Your teams have run quite a few successful missions in the past and you have a reputation for achieving the impossible, but you all still have a long way to go. Don’t start, Tucker,” she added as the aqua pegasus opened his mouth to argue. “You know it’s true. Did you even think to use your magic for anything but your sword?”

Tucker closed his mouth with an audible click and exchanged an awkward look with Sarge, and Simmer looked at the ground guiltily.

I’ll talk to him separately, Jess thought, looking away from the maroon pony before she drew any extra attention to him. This was not the time, place, or company to work through Simmer’s crystalmancer worries. “Tomorrow we’ll be going over your mistakes and focusing much more on personal combat training and teamwork exercises. Dismissed.”

With a closing salute, the stallions all trudged off towards the locker room, grumbling all the way.

Well, save for Caboose, who was just as cheery and bubbly as always. Soon only Jess and Tempest were left, and Jess could feel her emotions begin to shift. The frustration, the guilt, the sense of personal responsibility for this mess all began to creep back in as Jess took a good look at the mare in front of her.

Tempest didn’t look tired, exactly, but she wasn’t exhibiting that same confidence and bravado that she had earlier that day. Her eyes were troubled and uncertain, her posture was more reserved, maybe even hesitant, and her ears were slightly bent back. A far cry from the eager mare who had approached the morning’s training exercises like a warrior ready to fight through any obstacle to obtain her goal.

“Sooooo, am I in trouble again?” Tempest asked, somewhat sheepishly.

“Not directly,” Jess said, her voice firm. “Despite what happened, you did remain within the bounds set by King Sparrow. With Grind Stone, you never directly targeted his injuries from yesterday, and all of the safety spells did their job in keeping him from taking any lasting damage.” Thankfully.

“Still not even sure how that last one happened,” Tempest admitted. “I am sensing a ‘but’ thought.”

“And you’d be right,” Jess said, her gaze becoming a bit more of a glare. “Ignoring Grind Stone’s accidents, you worked to provide a challenge the Reds and Blue well. TOO well. You were clearly enjoying showing them up, to the point where this almost seemed to be a GAME to you. And when they finally got the upper hoof, you actually got upset and started fighting harder.

“You never tried to fight them at their level, providing them with a decent challenge that they could learn from. Your ‘lessons,’ as you called them, were much more like condescending taunts than teaching tools or techniques the guys could actually use, such as when you told them to recover quickly when intentionally not giving them enough time to do so. Or when you told Grind Stone not to let himself be caught in a vulnerable position after nearly punching him below the belt. Even if you were never going to let them win, victory still should have at least felt obtainable to them. Instead, you spent most of the time just showing them up and mopping the floor with them!”

Jess tried to keep her voice from rising too much, but it was a struggle, to say the least.

Keep it together, Jess. You need to keep your cool. Don’t let your frustration get the better of you.

“I…well, when you put it like that, it does make more sense…” Tempest said, scratching the back of her head awkwardly. “But, why didn’t you tell me before we started?”

“Because this was a test for you too,” Jess said. “You were the leader of the Storm King’s army, one of his top generals that led his forces on numerous campaigns. And you only got that far because of your skills and cunning, something that many of the storm beasts we interrogated vouched for. The reason you had been allowed to move up so quickly within the ranks of King Sparrow’s army despite your probation was because we knew you had incredible skill.

“But all of the skills you demonstrated since joining our guard have been combat-based. We know you have experience giving orders and controlling troops, but we had no idea if your leadership skills and style would work well with the rules and regulations set out for our guard commanders. So, my superiors decided to let you lead, at least temporarily, to see if you had what it takes to head your own unit. And we both know what happened on your first day training the Red team.”

Tempest blushed, but the unicorn let Jess continue uninterrupted. “I will admit, I didn’t reprimand you as much as I likely should have.” And that’s on me. “However, given Grind Stone’s long history of infuriating those assigned to train him, King Sparrow decided to let you have another chance with this test. But what happened? You pushed as hard as you could, not trying to help the teams improve through a healthy challenge, but by giving them a beating so hard that it will be a miracle if they aren’t demotivated for the next month.”

Not that I helped much in that regard, she thought with another stab of guilt. My speech to them wasn’t exactly positive or uplifting.

“Yeah, well, that’s the way leadership was in the Storm Army,” Tempest said, her voice carrying with it a weight that made Jess stop and blink in surprise. It was the weight of a pony who had been cut down and broken until the scars had become their armor. “In the Storm Army, training isn’t as clean as it is here. It’s being beaten down every day with grueling drills, being paired against impossible partners with the expectation that you fail, and being given only enough medical care to make sure you can still get up and do it all again tomorrow. There are no motivational speeches, no instructors holding back to teach you. Just you fighting for survival, and making sure to give it all, every day, or you risk falling behind and being left at the back of the pack. If a solder at Grind Stone’s level was pitted against me, I would be expected to go all out, because their logic was that the only way to make him better was to hurt him until he fought back enough to stop the pain.

“I didn’t rise up the ranks because I was smarter or better at training others; it was by being ruthless and watching for the mistakes others made and learning from them. I only started to get actual strategy training and decent instruction once I became an officer. Then it was all about competing with the other officers to prove myself to the Storm King himself. To prove to him that I deserved my deal to be upheld and that I was worthy of his time.” She let out an almost hollow-sounding chuckle. “If only King Sparrow had found me before he did. I might just have become a general in his army by now. All without the years of torment to try and get back something he was willing to give me for free.”

“That…explains a lot, actually,” Jess admitted. She hadn’t been a part of the operation that took down the Storm King, nor the cleanup that occurred afterwards, but she had noticed a lot of subtle signs as Tempest’s parole officer. The way she had flinched during her initial training at every mistake, as if expecting harsh reprimands that never materialized. Her genuine shock at the doctors checking her over after she nearly got hit by the statue in Equestria. Her confusion as to why she was given days off and the fact that Sparrow had actually ordered her not to train on those days.

Jess had reported all of this to Tempest’s counselor, as was standard for Sparrow’s parole procedures, but had been told not to ask Tempest about these behaviors directly. Given the hopeless state she was in only months before and the years she spent in the proximity of an Akumu-corrupted Storm King, the counselor thought it best for Tempest to be allowed to process everything on her own or in the counseling room for the time being. If she wanted to talk about things with anypony else, then it had to be on her own terms, and only when she was ready.

This is the first time I’ve ever heard her talk about the Storm Army in so much detail. She normally just tries to ignore it whenever it comes up, and I made sure that even the Reds and Blues know not to bring it up. Is this a sign of her trusting me more? Or a sign that she is starting to feel better about discussing her past?

Yet, if that ‘always be fighting’ mindset was drilled into her for years, is it any wonder that she went so hard on the guys?

“It may have been worse, but that was also during the time I was being corrupted by a creepy fear monster, so I can’t really say how that affected anything,” Tempest said dryly, but when she reached to scratch the back of her head again, her hoof was shaking, and Jess could tell she wanted to move on. The pegasus made a mental note to tell Tempest’s counselor about this conversation, but let the subject change without incident. “But, based on your tone, I failed your hidden test. So, what now? Am I being demoted? More probation? King Sparrow going to come scold me again?” Her voice sounded neutral, or, at least, she tried to make it sound neutral, but Jess could pick up the subtle notes of defeat in it.

“Sparrow will be made aware, but whether or not he comes to ‘scold’ you is up to him,” Jess said, her voice still firm but her glare no longer present. “Same with your probation. However, no, you will not be demoted, and you will not be removed from the team unless Sparrow tells me otherwise. However, you are no longer allowed to supervise any training on your own, and you most definitely won’t be allowed to spar with Grind Stone for the foreseeable future. Either Wash or I will be the ones to lead any future training and will tell you when and where you use your skills and when you should hold back. Additionally, now that we have a better understanding of your leadership skills, you are to begin taking mentoring classes, ones that we can now tailor to your current position and learning style to better help you achieve your goals.

“You have talent, and a lot of potential. Your brief one-on-one with Tucker was close to what we would consider a true teaching session, and while harsher than I would like, it showed me you do have the ability to train others in a constructive way if you try. But as of now, you do not have what it takes to be a leader in Sparrow’s army. But with enough practice and willingness to learn a new way of thinking, I don’t see why you can’t become a strong leader in your own right. Any questions?”

“No, ma’am,” Tempest said, straightening up and saluting, her tone and expressions noticeably perking up in the process.

Maybe I’m not so bad at adding morale to the end of my speeches, Jess thought, feeling her own mood lift slightly. Talking to Tempest was good practice. Now I just need to do the same thing when I meet with everypony individually tomorrow. But if I can do it with Tempest, then there is a chance I can do it with the boys too.

“No, Miss Boss Lady.”

Caboose appeared out of seeming thin air next to them and Tempest jumped sidewise, squealing in surprise. Jess, who was used to Caboose being as stealthy as a ninja, was not phased.

“Would you stop doing that!?” Tempest exclaimed. “That’s the third time this week!”

“Doing what?” Caboose asked, tilting his head innocently.

“Can we help you, Caboose?” Jess asked, wondering why he had come back to the floor. Last she had seen, he was chatting happily to Church, who (as usual) was very much being a grumpypuss about it.

“Yes, hello. I was wondering if the now-somewhat-less-angry Tempest could show me her magic glowy thing again? I couldn’t see it too well up in the control box, but it looked kind of pretty.”

Tempest blinked.

Then blinked again.

Then looked at Jess uncertainly.

Jess grinned, then nodded. “Go ahead, Tempest. We’re done here. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Tempest returned the nod before turning to Caboose, grinning a little herself.

“So, you liked my magic?”
“Yes! It was nice! Almost like Pretty Tornado’s magic, but more sparkly! Was it hard to do?”

“It was, but it was so worth it! And I still can’t believe I did that! I mean, did you SEE the size of that crate!?” Tempest asked, a small bit of filly-like joy working its way out. “I thought for sure I would be taken out of the fight, but then my horn was all like ‘ZOOOOOOM’ and I caught the box! I can’t wait to see what else I can do! Oh, do you think I can teleport, or maybe—”

And off the two of them went, Tempest enthusiastically talking about all of the things she could do now that she had discovered a part of her that had been lost, Caboose eagerly listening even though Jess was sure he didn’t understand half of what she was babbling about. Yet seeing them bond gave Jess hope that Tempest could overcome her struggles, just like Wash had done thanks to the Reds and Blues.

“Enjoying the view, sis?”

Over the years, Jess had long since gotten used to Caboose’s method of stealth and his tendency to pop up at the most random times.

Church, on the other hoof, was a completely different story, and it was only through sheer training and exposure to his shenanigans that prevented her from either throwing something or punching him in a panic.

“Why must you ALWAYS do that?” Jess asked in exasperation, looking down at where her brother’s ghostly head was peeking up from the floor. Church just smirked.

“Tradition,” he said, floating up through the floor to join her. “So, how’s my baby sis doing?”

“I’m doing about as well as can be expected, given how today has been going,” Jess said with a small sigh. “Though I am surprised to see you so soon. I thought you were going to the locker room.”

“I was, but I knew that you, my grumpy sister, would probably be beating yourself up over what happened today, because Tempest failed your test or because you felt bad for us all being smashed flat or both or whatnot. And given that, I figured you would probably need some company tonight. So I decided to be the good big brother that I am and come make sure you weren’t getting all mopey for something that wasn’t your fault.”

“I can’t exactly escape all the blame,” Jess said. Church rolled his eyes yet thankfully remained silent. “Things didn’t go to plan, at all, even if it could have been worse. Much worse, if Tempest’s account of her training was anything to go by. Not to mention the fact that I could have done more to prepare Tempest for the test, or at least better assessed how she might handle a leadership role after what happened yesterday.”

“Hey, the whole point of that test was to see how she does WITHOUT any training or guidance, wasn’t it? So you could see how she operated and how to best help her move forward? And even if it was your fault, so what? You made a mistake. Do you really think that our little group of misfits, who fail on a near daily basis, are going to be upset at you for making a mistake?”

Jess couldn’t help but smile a little at that, especially given how silly Church’s face looked whenever he tried to raise an eyebrow.

“Maybe, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have a lot of work to do to help both Tempest and your ‘little group of misfits’ get prepared for future battles. I need to update our mentorship teacher on what I learned about Tempest so she can start making lesson plans, I need to go over my notes to figure out how to help you all function as part of a somewhat coordinated group, I need to wait until Grind Stone’s test results come back and see if he needs a restricted regimen for a while and figure out how to make up for all the NONSENSE that’s happened to him this week—”

“WELP!” Church exclaimed, and Jess cut off, realizing that her voice had been getting louder and louder with every word. Great, she thought, rubbing her forehead with a hoof. Way to make it obvious, self.

“As awesome as you are, you can’t do all that on an empty stomach now can you?” Church asked, giving her a wide grin that was just a little too knowing for Jess’s taste. “So how about I, your caring and super-smart brother, take you to get something to eat? After all, it had been a while since we’ve had a brother-sister dinner. I’m feeling…pizza.”

“I don’t…maybe,” Jess said uncertainly. “That does sound good, but I’m still worried about Grind Stone. I feel like we should at least check up on him first—”

As if harmony itself was waiting for her to say that, a scroll suddenly appeared between the two siblings in a small pop of teleportation. Jess instantly recognized the medical seal on it, and snatched it out of the air.

And as her eyes scanned each line, Jess could feel some of the tension still left inside her chest slowly start to unwind.

“Now how’s that for timing?” Church chuckled. “So, how’s Mister Lemon Drop?”

“According to the doctors, they want him to take the rest of the week off, but afterwards he should be good to return to fully active duty,” Jess said with a soft sigh. “And, apparently, Simmer has already made his way to the medical wing, and the doctor says the two of them are bickering like an old married couple.”

“HA! If that’s not a good sign, I don’t know what is! So now that we don’t need to worry about Grind Stone…”

You have a very one-track mind sometimes, brother. But it’s times like this that I love you for it.

“Yes Church, I could really go for some pizza,” Jess agreed, her stomach grumbling at the thought. “Some good old Island Paradise, just like the old days.”

“What is it with you and that abomination of a pizza?” Church groaned.

“Hey, it’s delicious. Especially the croutons!”

“You already have the bread in the crust, especially since you tend to get the extra poofy crust! The croutons are just MORE BREAD!”

“And that’s the BEST PART!”

“You’re ridiculous.”

“And YOU put ranch dressing on your pizza! Don’t you tell me I’M ridiculous!” Jess said, earning a soft chuckle from Church.

“Ok, you got me there, but I still think it’s weird.” Church said. “But then again, I am a ghost in a golem body, so I think the ‘weird’ train has left the station a decade or two ago. Heck, I still don’t even know how I still CAN eat while I’m a ghost, but hey? If it works…”

The ghostly stallion floated over to a nearby container, and Jess could just make out the end of a golden hoof sticking out from behind it before Church reclaimed his body. Once the gold had been replaced with the familiar blue of Church’s fur, the stallion happily trotted back to Jess and wrapped a leg around her shoulders as the two of them began to walk towards the exit. It was a familiar feeling, one that worked alongside her brother’s continued rambling to help the stress of the day slowly fade away. She leaned into his grip, sighing softly as her mind finally began to calm.

Author's Note

We interrupt our normal story to bring you one of the best Red Vs Blue episodes. Plus 1 sin. (Current sin count = 3).

But yes, at long last, another story update from the world of Spero. Don't worry, we will get back to the normal story revolving around Twilight in the next chapter. But given how the Red Vs Blue idiots are cannon in this universe, I couldn't resist having this be the 10th chapter of the story. It just fits so well, and also gives us a lot of development into these characters. And they will be popping up throughout the story, so I though it would be a good time to give them some development.

I am just glad that I managed to get this out today as it is none other than my Fiancee/Editors BIRTHDAY! She worked really hard on this story and loved working with these goofballs, so a special thank you to her for all her hard work. Happy Birthday sweetie.

As for all of you, I hope you enjoy the story and I will see you all next time.