PonyballzKai: Adventures In Equestria

by Spider5939

Chapter 30: Spice Up Your Life

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Celestia’s sun was now beginning to set on the mystical land of Equestria as Saffron, Cyre, and Pinkie struggled to get any customers for the tasty treat. Cyre was starting to get angrier with how prudish Canterlot ponies could be. He just was glad he didn’t know any royals like that... other than Vegeta of course, but he’s not really much of a prince anymore.

“The day is almost over, and we haven't found any ponies! What will we do?” Saffron Masala was understandably discouraged, given how well they’d say had gone with advertising. Pinkie’s resolve only made her try harder as two ponies walked up to her.

“How many hooves does it have?”

“No hooves yet, but hopefully soon!”

“Well, when it gets rated, let us know.” After this notion, the two mates walked away. This only made Pinkie, as well as Cyre angry. He’d seen snobbish people on earth, but nothing as bad as this as far as he’s known! However, two that ponies had shown up, by the name of Chargrill Breadwinner and Orange Slice, who were actually interested in trying something other than literally everything else in canterlot.

Chargrill Was visiting Canterlot with Orange to be adventurous but was rather disappointed with the food and had plainly stated that the food in all those fancy places tasted like “somepony cooked up nothin' with a side o' nothin'.”

“Well, please, come try the Tasty Treat. I think it's going to be exactly what you're looking for.” Saffron was quick to say as the three of them walked back to the tasty treat as Rarity finished the “minor” modifications.


All three quickly made it back, with Pinkie, Saffron and Cyre all horrified by what Rarity had done to the place. It also didn’t help that Cyre saw Ruby and Mita in hoity-toity outfits that they clearly weren’t comfortable in. And along with all that, Cumin was even more unenthusiastic than before. Pinkie was the first to voice her concerns.

Rarity just brushed it all off and wasn’t upset at all. “I know. Isn't it perfect? Zesty is sure to love it.”

“I thought we were trying to make this the most unique and beautiful restaurant in Canterlot! Not make it exactly like every other restaurant!” This response from pinkie only made Rarity laugh at her valid complaints.

“We want to help our friends by getting them three hooves. That will only happen if this is like every other restaurant.” As much as Cyre hated Rarity saying it, she wasn’t Really wrong. So far only identical restaurants have seemed to do well. But Celestia damn it, he wanted this restaurant to at least try to be an outlier!

Saffron Masala was shown the new food by her Father, much time her horror and disgust. “Father, what is this?!”

“Not that! Anything but that!” both Cyre and Pinkie chimed in agreement.

“This is what we must cook if we want to succeed here!” Coriander tried to calm his daughter, but to no avail.

“This isn't what I wanted! I wanted Canterlot to like us for us!” Saffron said as Pinkie confronted Rarity, as she told her she had ruined the restaurant.

Rarity again brushed it off. “Oh, pff. Kch. Ts! We helped save the restaurant. Now, where are the other guests? How many other ponies are coming?”

Pinkie, Saffron, and Cyre stared amongst themselves, before turning to Rarity. “Two.”

Now it was Rarity’s turn to be surprised. “Just two?! I thought you said you could pack the place with ponies no matter what!”

You said you would make the restaurant better... so I guess we both didn't know what we were talking about!” Rarity gasped at Pinkies statement. But before she could utter a word of protest, there was a knock at the door, which made Rarity gasp again as she knew instantly who it was.

“Zesty Gourmand! Everypony, places!” Everyone managed to get into proper position (or just stand in place) as the door opened to reveal zesty gourmand, plus the two other ponies that had agreed to come along. As Rarity gulped in anticipation, Cyre just cringed. He was never a fan of critics, but he could stand to learn from them. This pony here though... he wasn’t quite sure.

Zesty took a seat as Coriander walked over unenthusiastically. “Welcome to The Tasty Treat. What can I get you this evening?”

“I hardly think it matters, but by all means, try your best to impress.” Zesty responded with barely a hint of emotion.

Orange Slice, one of the other two ponies that came there, made an order as well. “Well, we'll both try the special this evening. Maybe with a little kick to it, eh? Yeah, we've been craving some food with actual taste.”

“Saffron Masala, what are you doing?!” This was in response to Saffron bringing out a soup for Zesty to try, much to Coriander’s and Rarity’s ire.

“I'm trying to save our reputations! I've given it at least a little bit of flavor.”

Rarity protested against bringing it out, much to Cyre’s and Pinkie’s confusions. “No-no-n-n-no, but that's not what Zesty wants!”

“What kind of food expert doesn't want flavor?! That's insane!” pinkie quickly poured some of the soup into the bowl and bring it outside. However, due to an argument about it, the bowl ended up landing on Zesty’s head. Rarity tried to get her to stay, but she was promptly shut down.

“Rarity, when it comes to fashion, you are adequate. But take some advice from a friend – keep your opinions out of restaurants. Substandard food, laughable service, and I would think even youcould recognize that the decor here is trying desperately while desperately failing. Recommending a disreputable place such as this could do serious damage to your social standing.”

“Disreputable?! You mean a place with food that actually tastes good?” Pinkie interjected.

“Yeah! Since when are you an ultimate authority on food? You only eat one type of food in canterlot apparently! I don’t see that as valid food critiquing! I could do better as a judge, simply for the fact I’m a saiyan and we stuff our mouths constantly with new food, good or bad!” Cyre said with much contempt. He was already irked, but what was said by zesty next nearly made him lose his cool.

Anypony can throw ingredients together and create an obvious taste that uncultured ponies and bipedal freaks like those three can register But it takes a true culinary artist to create a subtle taste, the barest hint of a sensation. That's what I bring to Canterlot. That's art.”

That nearly made him fly off the handle. But that didn’t stop his new friends from feeling that spike in his anger, in which they rightfully recoiled as Cyre chose to just try to cool off outside as the others wallowed in their newfound shame.

While mother and daughter shared memories of the past of how they cooked together and were far happier then, pinkie and Rarity agreed and apologized to each other, forming a new plan. As they did that, Cyre entered the building, considerably calmer.

“Pinkie, we are the perfect team for this! We were just doing the wrong jobs! I will go out and bring the crowd! You stay here and make sure this place is every bit as unique and rustic as it was the moment we walked in!” Rarity said to Pinkie.

“And? What about us?” Coriander said as he gestured to himself, Cyre, the two girls Cyre brought along, a saffron.

“You two? You are going to cook! Make whatever you want, and make a lot of it! I intend to bring a crowd! Cyre, you Ruby and Mita will join me outside! Oh, and take off those stuffy outfits you two!”

Ruby and Mita never looked happier when she said that and the quickly got out of them as they joined Rarity. A few minutes passed before all of them sat in the dining room for one last meeting.

“It's almost time! Is everypony ready for the grand re-re-opening?” Rarity asked everyone that and Cyre, Ruby and Mita gave thumbs up or nodded. Saffron and Coriander had a message for both Pinkie and Rarity.

“Before we open, my father and I just wanted to say... Thank you for all of your help. We've both been so stressed about the restaurant succeeding that we forgot what it was we loved about it in the first place.” Was Saffron’s message.

“Cooking is something we used to love to do together. No matter what happens next, thank you for reminding us of that.” Was Coriander’s message. Pinkie was ecstatic as they all had a group hug. Excluding Cyre of course, he wasn’t much for that stuffy type of thing. Soon enough, the place was filled with ponies after they opened for the evening. Everything was going quite well... before Zesty ended up showing up at the place again after noticing the business.

“What's this?! What is everypony doing here?! This place has no hooves! It is not in keeping with the level of cuisine that I have set for Canterlot! Nopony told you this place was acceptable!”

Sweet Biscuit, one of the bystanders, spoke up. “Uh, Rarity and her friend said it was good? They told us!”

They told you? And who are theyto tell you anything? Rarity can tell you what hats to wear with which skirts. Her friend can tell you how to maintain a tragic look for a frizzy mane. They can't tell you what food you can eat!”

“No, we can't, and neither can you! Nopony has the right to tell these ponies what to think! Zesty, you have very... specific...”

“And very strange!”

“Yes, and very strange opinions about food, and that's your right. But just because you like your food a certain way, there is no reason to tell these ponies that they need to do the same!”

After the argument between Rarity, Pinkie and Zesty, other shop owners also spoke in defense of Rarity. This made the crowd chatter and cheer in response.

“Rarity is right! I for one think the food here is delicious! I own The Smoked Oat on Restaurant Row; I hate the food we make! From now on, it's all smoked, basted, and grilled!”

“This food is an inspiration! I own The Bake Stop. I'm going to bake my mother's bundt cake the way she made it – full of flavor!”

“Zesty, are you sure you wouldn't like to try the food? Ignoring a unique and fresh establishment such as this could do serious damage to your social standing.” Rarity dealt a real blow, but it was Cyre who had a last word in.

“On top of that, I saved Canterlot just weeks ago. You can’t do any tasting in Canterlot if there is no Canterlot! So on top of that, you have me to thank for saying your sorry excuse of a job, you poser!” Thus made the crowd gasp, and Zesty flabbergasted as she left in a fit, before the crowd cheered once more.

Saffron and Coriander thanked them all as Rarity and Pinkie noticed their cutie marks ringing.

“Nothing can stop the dynamic duo of Pinkie and Rarity!” Pinkie girly said as They all nodded in agreement.


Author's Note

I’m torn on which episode to do next, flutter brutter or to where and back again. I wanna get moving to season 7, but I also do want to move to fast leaving out plot points. Leave which one you’d rather see in the comments below!

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