Are you guys still 'chillaxing' now?

"Yep."

"Of course."

"Eeyup."

"What else would we be doing?"

Hmm, oh, I don't know. Maybeeee.....actual CRIME FIGHTING?! You ARE superponies after all.

"I have an idea!"

P1nK!E st0P m3sS/nG WitH mY LEtT3RZ!!!
/)(\

"Okie dokie lokie pokie!"

"Our hero, everypony."
"I know, aren't we awesome?!"

*sigh* Where's that script?

"Riiight here!"

Okay, let's see...

To-Do List

-Bake cherrychangas
-Stay incredibly awesome (as usual)
-Bake MORE cherrychangas
-Participate in this year's Death Battle
-Bah sum appuls
-Amaze you with how many cherrychangas I'll bake
-Annoy...basically everypony
-Repair alt. universe I overenthusiastically destroyed (sorry 'bout that)
-Get a life Just kidding! Needed a good laugh this morning

Pinkie, this is your to do list.

"Oops, sorry let me get that."

She reaches into her pockets and pulls out a piñata shaped like Tirek, year-old Nightmare Night candy, a rubber duck, until-

"You're right here, why are you still narrating?"

Force of habit...

"Oh, okay, then. Here it is!"

Alright, just a few more adjustments. Buck all that, edit THAT aaand...

Suddenly, the sky fast forwards through the night and to the next morning. Eventually, a pigeon flies through the window carrying a scroll and passes it to Bronzus.

"Hm, Mayor Milton 'Frisbee' Disk wants us to show up on Mane Street for the annual city parade this afternoon."

That's MUCH better.

"Killjoy..."

On Mane Street

The city ponies shortly arrive on the street as the police block off the surrounding roads for the event. Foals were shaking in anticipation, security was...adequately tight, and comic geeks waiting to spot their 'Best Superpony'.

"If I'm not in there, I'm raising Tartarus!"

"Who are you talking to?"

"None of your business, Reflecto! Let's go!"

The Z-Force gear up for their appearance in the parade that is MOST certainly, 100% positively not gonna get crashed in the slightest.

"You're not even TRYING are you?"
"I believe him."

"Okay, we'll just fly over the balloons a few times, do some air tricks, and then- Pinkie what are you doing?" Bronzus asked.

"Taking my tricycle. Somethin' wrong with that?"

"I-It's a tricycle. Not really the most SUPER way to appear." Rubble states.

"ExCUSE me?! This is the
Cool
Unit
Pony-proofed
Credibly
Armored
Kookie
Envoy
or C.U.P.C.A.K.E for short!"

"Pinkie, I'm not sure if-"

"TOO LATE!"

She hops on the 'C.U.P.C.A.K.E' and pedals off in the blink of an eye.

"Let her go." Stronghold huffs. "She's Pinkie."

The rest of the team board the BlueBird and fly off into the city while the pink menace takes the ~~long~~ super mega fun way.

Pinkie, this isn't the Emperess' New Jam.

"I REGRET NOTHING!!!"

Meanwhile, in the 'Bad Guy Check #5: abandoned observatory', a brown stallion watches the parade unfold with his Baddy Check #17: 'dumb as buck henchponies', Patsy 1 and Patsy 2. Soon, his walkie buzzes to Baddy Check #63:

"Is your team in position?"

"Affirmative, sir."

"Excellent."

'Secret Boss'.

"Yo, trainee." he calls out in the walkie.

"Roger, boss?"

"Who's Roger?" he says to himself. "A-Anyways, you're up today."

"Oh that is superly duperly fantastic to here! What to wear, what to wear! Maybe a green- NO a red!"

"Just hurry!"

"Oops, alrighty!"

"Ugh, all these sugar fueled kids annoy me so." the boss groans.

"Heh, I feel your pain. I hate sugar."

As Pinkie zigzags through the streets, her mysterious Pinkie sense throws her off...

Of the bike, screaming.

"Pinkie, is everything alright down there?" Bronzus calls on her earpiece worried.

"I-I'm good! I just felt...a disturbance." she pants.

She gets back on and rides off.

"I think it's about time I kick into my super jams. GET IN THE ZONE!"

Pinkie pushes a button on the C.U.P.C.A.K.E.

"Let's hit it!"

Eventually, she reaches the blocked off roads and hurdles over every single one.

"Where are the police at this time?
"In the parade, of course!"
"Yeah, I got that. But they ARE aware of the risks of criminals running around, right?"

"Smart Me, you're over thinking things. Everything'll be fi-"

A group of masked stallions on a nearby building carrying small crates catches her eye.

"O-Or maaayybe you could be-"

"Abso-bucking-lutely right!"

"Whatever, you're lucky you're a disembodied voice."

Pinkie turns a corner and leaps onto an Angry Curds float, gaining curious looks from the audience. She launches herself and the C.U.P.C.A.K.E off their trademark slingshot and flies over the crowd and lands on the building's roof.

As she ascends, a spray can falls from her belt and catches the attention of little Babs Seed.

"H-Hey, ya dropped your can!"

Yeah, like she'd hear her from that high.

"Surprise, bad guys!"

The four criminals jolt in shock.

"What is this?" one of them asks.

"I believe this is called a...'con-fron-ta-shun'?"

"Get the super!"

Pinks pedals to the metal- er, plastic, and rushes at Baddy Check #18: 'the charging, POWERLESS henchponies'. With enough speed, she spins the tricycle into a wheelie that slugs a stallion in the jaw as she jumps and tackles another. She hammers a balloon into his face, flips over and lands on one's mane and tugs at his hair, making him punch himself silly.

"HA! IT ACTUALLY WORKED! THANK YOU RAT-PATOOTY!!!"

Funny how, out of ALL this acrobatic skills, not ONE enemy falls off the building.

"Rated E, remember?"

Yeah, but remember the Incredible Bulk game? He slammed a freakin' train car on somepony! It's a faaaamily game.

"Yeah...it was rated 'F' for Foals and everything."
"There was pony juice everywhere..."

"Whatever, obscure references can be such a PAIN!" she says, striking the last enemy to the ground. "Hoo! Great way to start off your mornings."

"Patsy #4, come in. Where are ya guys with the gear?"

Pinkie hops over and grabs the henchpony's walkie.

"On the way, boss." she mimics the stallion's gruff voice perfectly. "But uh, hypothetically speaking, where would we be taking this stuff?"

"Ugh, we went through this a hundred times, if the building looks old and/or abandoned, I'm most likely there. Sweet Celestia, DERP-3 would make a better help."

"Duh, 'kay. See ya then."

"Wow. That was on point."
"Oh that's COOL! Do Chrysalis!"

Pinkie clears her throat.

"Bow to me, for I have CHEESE legs! Aren't they just GOUDA!"

The three giggle their flanks off as they locate the boss.

At the hideout

"Yes sir, we're right on schedule...yes, Mr. Snuffy's been fed today...no I'm not PLAYING with it!" he says, holding a crystal that shrinks a mug on the table.

Suddenly, there's a knock at the door.

"There they are. Gotta go, boss."

When he opens the door, however-

"Special delivery, friend!"

A wall of confetti bursts through the door, throwing the stallion against the wall.

"Let's get it started in here!"

"Who are you?" he winces.

"I'm Pinkie-Pool, who the buck are you?"

"Name's Apex. It WOULD'VE been a pleasure to meet you."

"How co- whoop!"

Pinkie leans back as Apex nearly slices at her with a glowing axe. As he pulls back to attack again, a stray piece of paper falls out of his coat.

"Oh no."

The mare's eyes widen and jaw dropped at first sight of the note.

"Your real name is PRANCES?!"

The superpony bursts into a hysterical laughter, angering the stallion.

"Ha! Priceless!"
"And I thought Blasterface was a goofy name."

He pulls out a crystal and aims it at the mare.

"I can't even say it anymore, I'm sorry!" she wheezes.

"See ya, friend."

The crystal shoots a red beam that engulfs the pony, pushing her through the brick wall itself. As she plummets, her cherrychanga recipe flies out of her pocket and at the hooves of the stallion.

"A piece to remember you by!" he says, pocketing the note.

All the commotion alerts the crowd as Pinkie falls on a float dedicated to Captain Equestria.

"Rookie, you're up." Apex says in the walkie as he flees.

"Aye aye, boss!"

The injured super staggers to her hooves and the crowd cheers. When she stands, her face burns hotter than a thousand suns. To protect her identity, she hides under a paper mache shield, takes off her mask and pulls out a makeup mirror.

"Walk it off! Just WALK IT OFF!!!"
"How?! It's on her bucking face! *gags* That's just terrible."

"Maybe...nopony would notice?"

"Y-Yeah, nopony would notice your freak- FACE!"
"I-I'm sorry...you look like one of Derpy's muffin disasters."

Soon, the shield melts into a pool as she dons her mask, when she is confronted by a yellow earth pony with a black mask and red suit.

"Hey there, I heard you're a bit of a troublemaker." he says.

"Well THAT'S the understatement of the day."

"Maybe I am, maybe I'm not. Who are you?"

"I'm Cheesizoid! Member of the League of Ignorant Entertainers or 'L.I.E' for short, and I've been given the greatest task of bringing you in."

"But I didn't do anything wrong!"

"Well, you did
"And filled the team's soap dispensers with whipped cream."
"And let's not forget the amount of property damage in-"

"ALRIGHT, YOU'VE MADE YOUR POINT!" she screams. "Look, Cheesizoid, I don't know who you work for-"

"Neither do I. They just offered me free cheddar with a side of plastic seeds for Boneful here."

Pinkie looks behind him to see a bloated rubber chicken resting on his back with a black mask.

"I see. But I can't let you turn me in so..."

Without warning, she pulls out her cannon and sends the stallion flying into a Haybro themed float, amazing the crowd.

"T-That cannon...so famil-"

Before Cheesizoid could process things, Pinkie comes barreling into him, uppercutting the pony on a tall Trans-morphers statue on the float.

"This is gonna be fun." he chuckles eagerly.

The giddy rookie unrealistically oozes his way into the statue, becoming one with it.

"Uh, team?"

"Yes, Pinkie?" Bronzus chips in.

"Nothing much, just a giant statue of Oblivious Prime is trying to SQUISH ME!" she utters, running from the pursuing behemoth.

"Something you don't hear every day, but we're on it." Stronghold adds.

Eventually, the BlueBird flies overhead as Rubble and Stronghold drop from the ship.

As Prime's about to step on the mare, Stronghold rips off Prime's right limb off as Rubble holds him in place in concrete. Before his arm hits the ground, a yellow ooze clutches it and pulls it back in place.

"Ugh, this is getting ridiculous!"

Rubble turns to cement and slinks her way to his forehooves then to tough stone, doing the whole 'Quit hitting yourself' gag. While he's distracted, Bronzus parks the BlueBird and races towards the giant with Reflecto. The metal super gets a running start as Reflecto uses his 'attractive' powers to fling him full force at the robot's chest, shattering him to pieces. The crowd gives a standing ovation to the show as Cheesizoid morphs back to his normal size, collapsing in defeat.

"THAT was for Shia LaHoof!" Bronzus exclaims.

"Woohoo- ouchie!"

The Z-Force rush to their fallen member, whose wounds take over.

"Pinkie, are you all right!" Rubble asks worriedly.

"I-I'm the prettiest ballerina in the whoooole pickle barrel." she slurs.

"I can't tell!"

"Let's get her back to the mansion."

Cheesizoid tries to stagger off, only to be caught in Dragonflap's toothy grip.

"Oh, you're coming with us." Reflecto says matter of factly.

"Okie...dokie." he sighs.

Everypony jumps aboard as the Mare with the Marshmallows mumbles on.

"Pinkie, rest."

"Come on everypony...smile...smile...smile..."

Then, she passes out.

Author's Note

Google it, you millennials...

You are a millennial, dude!

Zip it!!!