Raven taps the mic, makeing sure it works, “Welcome, welcome, welcome! Welcome to the first broadcast ever on omniuniversal radio! This is 85.5: The Talk, thank you all for tuning in. Here with your hosts, Ravens Breath!”

The others all lean in and say their names, “The Courier!”

“Avatar!”

“Chem!”

“Survivor!”

“And last but not least, me, Slenderman!”

A single blast from a trombone plays in the background, “And here with us today is special guest: Survivor’s Discord!”

Discord floats his mic up to him, “Hello Everypony, and every human! It is indeed I, Discord, Lord of Chaos! Of corse, I’m only the one from Survivor’s universe.”

Raven holds his mic up with a skeletal hand, “It is good to have you on the show, Discord.”

“Oh, please, it’s my honor to appear on the first broadcast. Especially when Survivor is one of the hosts, and it’s basically just me hanging with friends.”

Slendy holds his mic up with a tentical, “So, Raven, what’s the topic today?”

Raven looks over at Slendy, “Glad you asked, Slendy. Today, we’re awnsering questions from Discord!”

A round of applause is in the background, “Oh, moi? Why, I’m honored!”

Chem floats his mic up, “So, Discord, what do you wish to ask us?”

Discord leans back in his chair, “Hmm, yes, what should I ask?” He snaps, “Oh, I know!” He leans back inwards, “Why don’t we hear about your first experiences with the Heat?”

Survivor jerks his head to look at Discord, “The Heat!? You want us to talk about that!?”

Raven joins Survivor, “Yeah, I mean, that was traumatic! And I am older than the world itself!”

Slendy shudders, “My tenticals were... defiled... they are no longer pure.”

The other three wear confused looks, “What’s the Heat?”

Discord snaps, and ponts over at them, “See! They don’t even know what it is!”

Survivor looks at them, “You don’t know what the Heat is?”

They all shake their heads no.

Raven looks at the others, “Guys, we can save them from that!”

Discord puts on a smile, and leans forward, “And imagine how many listeners might not have experienced it. You could save a lot of helpless stallions.”

Slendy looks between the other two, “We have to share our stories, for the greater good. To protect those who are innocent!”

Discord nods rapidly, “Yes! To save all those out there! I mean, we’re all males here, let’s exchange our war stories!”

Survivor sighs, “Fine, I guess we can... relive those memories. Raven, why don’t you go first?”

Raven’s face drops like he is going through a PTSD flashback, “It was before the war, in fact, it was on my second year there. For those who don’t know, Sweetie and I were dateing back then, now we’re getting married, but that’s beside the point. It started out as a normal spring day, a Monday in fact. Little did I know, this was the day all the mares went into Heat.”

Discord jumps in, “For all out there that don’t know what Heat is, allow me to explain.” He pulls a chalkboard out of nowhere, “See, ponies can only get pregnant when they are in Heat. This means their libido is increased, for the mares. The stallions do not have the same effect happen to them. Yada, yada, basically, the stallion has to either be married or hide if he wants to survive. If a single stallion is unlucky enough to travel out... they never come back the same.”

Raven nods, “Yeah, and their were no other males outside. I wondered why, but decided not to care. I planned to hang out with Sweetie that day, the worst mistake I’ve ever made. This was the first Heat that Sweetie had ever gone through, and a quick warning, the first Heat is the worst, and it is then that they are the scariest. After the first, it becomes slightly better, but that first is something a male never wants to be near.”

Discord snaps some popcorn into existence, “Do tell.”

Raven continues on, “I found her at her house, as usual. I was a bit surprised when Rarity wasn’t there, but she was going through the same thing as well. I eventually found Sweetie in her room... and this is a Teen broadcast, not Mature. Put it simply, I ran, I ran far and as fast as possible. I tried to hide at Apple Bloom’s farm, another mistake when she saw me as well. Scootaloo somehow figured out where I was, and I was running away from three Necromancer mares in Heat.”

Survivor grabs some popcorn, “How did you escape?”

Raven thinks for a bit, “I think I ran for an entire day, then Sombra found me. He saw what was happening, and nearly sacrificed himself to help me. He grabbed me up in smoke form, and we barely managed to fly to the highest tower in Canterlot. Where I saw Luna with a guard and... we flew to another tower and hid up there until the week was over.”

Discord claps, “So, first lesson we’ve learned: don’t go outside, and don’t forget the day it starts. Also, don’t go near those going through it for the first time. How about Slendy beings us the next story.”

Slender shudders, his tentacles unconsciously curleing and uncurling, “Slenderman, the orignal personality, apparently accesed a few of my memories. He manages to take control of the body and... we... we did them like that Japanese stuff. It’s very fuzzy in my mind, because he was in control, I just remember waking up in a pile of mares and stallions alike.”

Discord’s eyes widen, “Well, that’s... interesting? We can’t really learn a lesson from that other than don’t let an alternate personality take over during Heat. Now, how about you, Survivor?”

Survivor’s pain from remembering can be seen through his mask, “I was visiting Ponyville, wich is a mare heavy town. I caught the attention of Twilight, and apparently left the day before it started. When I got back to New Vegas, another mare heavy town, it had already begun, and I managed to baracade myself in my office with the sacrifice of a few brave stallions along the way. When I was done barricadeing myself in, Twilight teleported in.”

Discord laughs as he thinks, “Oh yes, she made you read science textbooks!”

Survivor pulls out his revolver, pointing it at Discord, “Don’t remind me.”

Discord still laughs, “And tell about human inventions!”

Survivor cocks back the hammer, “One last chance!”

Discord doesn’t stop, “And she tought you math!”

“Discord, you bastard!”

*Bang!*

—(Techinical difficulties, please wait.)—

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!”

—(Technicial-)—

Slendy’s voice cuts back in, “Why is the microphone a potato!”

—(Tech-)—

Chem can be heard in the background, “Why are my potatoes microphones! Fix this Discord!”

—(T-)—

“You’ll never take me alive!”

*Bang!*

“Oh shit, I forgot I can’t die! They’re taking me alive!”

—(Diff-)—

It cuts back in, as it was before, only Discord has a black eye. Survivor picks up his microphone, “Well, that’s all that we’re doing today. This has been 85.5: The Talk.”

Raven picks his up as well, “All viewers are allowed to call in! Just send a question to our sponser, and we’ll awnser it next show! And remember, be careful around Heat week.”

Author's Note

If you want to ask a question to the crew, simply send a PM to me with the question, and it may be featured next time!