"Take The Fucking Parakeet!"

by FoxMcCloud7921

Rating: mature
Tags: Comedy, Flim and Flam, Equestria Girls, Sunset Shimmer, Profanity, Twilight Sparkle (EqG)
Length: 1485

Sunset faces off against her greatest challenge yet: ring toss.

Sunset Shimmer has faced against sirens, two fellow humans corrupted by magic, and a mind-wiping stone, but she's about to face off against her greatest challenge yet: ring toss.

Published 2018-07-08 05:00:07 UTC
Last updated 2018-07-08 05:00:07 UTC

Or How to Actually Win a Game of Ring Toss

It was the opening day for Equestria Land, the newest theme park in Canterlot and judging by the amount of people that turned up, it was going to be a successful park. Sunset and the other girls had come to see Rarity as she was now the lead designer for the upcoming parade that was premiering in the evening and had now decided to split up and take part in the festivities. As Sunset and Twilight made their way around the park, Sunset was trying to figure out just how the creator of this park even knew about names such as “Equestria” and “Nightmare Moon” for that matter. I think when I get home I’m going to write Princess Twilight a letter…probably should send Celestia one too.

Still, she had to admit it was an impressive park, with over fifty different rides to choose from as well as just as many concession and food stands. They were now in the games section of park and Twilight couldn’t help but look at each one, a glint of temptation in her eyes. It was when they got to the end of the row of games that Twilight stopped.

The stand in question was a simple game of ring toss which was occupied by a duo of colorful individuals; judging by their looks, it could easily be assumed the two were brothers. The two of them were quick to notice Twilight’s curiosity and quickly took advantage. “Hello there young lady!” one of the brothers said. “I know that glint in your eye when I see it! This girl wants a prize and getting one couldn’t be easier!”

“Too easy in fact!” the other brother said. “All you have to do is get the ring around one of these bottles! That’s all it takes!”
Sunset looked over and saw that Twilight was the one being addressed. “Come on Twilight, don’t even bother with them. You know those games are rigged on purpose to squeeze every bit out of you.”

“Blasphemy!” both brothers scoffed.

“Come now, we wouldn’t do such a tactless thing like that!”

“Sure, it takes a little skill and luck, but it’s not impossible!”

Sunset didn’t seem convinced as she glanced over at Twilight again. However, the girl had a slight grin on her face. “Oh come on Sunset, of course I’m aware how these games work: there’s a trick behind it and usually it depends on air velocity, momentum, the angle at which you throw…”

Sunset could only stare at her as she blanked out for a moment. It’s not that she didn’t understand what Twilight was saying, it was that this world’s physics, as she was still learning, was slightly different than Equestria’s physics. Well, probably more than that. The other thing that was bothering her was that for some reason, these two men reminded her of some ponies she had encountered in Equestria at one point, though she couldn’t remember what their names were. She then sighed in defeat. “Fine, but I did warn you.”

“Excellent! We have ourselves a new challenger!”

“But remember, you only have one shot!”

Twilight took the ring and studied the two rows of bottles carefully. Sunset could imagine the gears turning in her head as she studied the field and prepared her shot. Once she was ready, she flung the ring from her hand and it quickly got around one of the bottles…only to suddenly fly off onto the ground.

“Mm, it was close but not enough I’m afraid.”

Twilight looked stunned. “But… I angled it perfectly! I even made sure to compensate for momentum!”

“I told you, they’re impossible to win,” Sunset said, putting a hand on her shoulder to console her. “Look, let’s just go, I’ll get you a caramel apple to cheer you up.”

“It’s unfortunate, but we understand,” the one brother said snidely.

“The game just isn’t for everyone, so better quit now,” the other added.

Sunset froze. She knew the two of them were taunting them and part of her knew she shouldn’t give in to her words, but this was a matter of pride. Sunset Shimmer, no matter whether she was a former student of Celestia or a girl in high school, was not a quitter. “You know what, on second thought let me give it a try.”

“But you just said…” Twilight said.

“I know what I just said but I’m going to prove these two wrong!” Sunset snapped. She then handed over more tickets to them.

“See, a few words of encouragement were all you needed!”

“We’re certain you’ll get it this time!”

Sunset wasn’t going to follow some formula of physics, but she knew she had to have the ring bounce at the right spot for it to catch instead of just bouncing off. She then noticed the rings were indeed made of rubber, which further explained how these two got away with scamming their customers. Still, she could use that to her advantage. She tossed the ring, aiming for the front and center part of the two rows. Unfortunately, she put a little too much force as the ring merely bounced off the side of one of the bottles.

Sunset growled slightly as she could imagine the two men were probably grinning at her. “No big deal…” She then gave the two more tickets.

“Uh…you sure you don’t need any help with this?” Twilight asked.

“…What do you got?” Sunset asked.

“Give me one second…” Twilight said as she brought out a notebook and pen and started writing. After a few minutes she stopped. “Alright, I got it. Do what you just did but angle your toss about sixty degrees.”

“You’re the expert here.” She aimed her toss carefully…only for it to somehow fall between the bottles. “Oh no no, I’m not giving up!”

“We can do this Sunset!”

Unfortunately, the next three attempts proved to be failures and they were starting to run low on tickets. “Damn it, why aren’t we getting this!?” Sunset said irritably.

“Maybe there’s no possible solution.” As much as Twilight hated to admit it, what other options did they have?

“Alright, this will be the last one,” Sunset said. She decided to throw logic out of the window and decided to wing it, throwing the ring up in the air and somehow praying the ring would just fall on a bottle. At that moment, the ring came down and wrung itself around a bottle almost bottle. Sunset couldn’t believe it. “Twilight, I did it! I finally-”

As soon as she said it, the ring suddenly popped off the bottle and fell onto the ground. Sunset could only stare in horror as she felt her eye start to twitch. “But…it was right there! It was on! How did it-!?” She suddenly glared at the two men. “What did you two do!? You did something for that ring to come off!”

“Ma’am, are you accusing us of interfering?” The two men gasped in what Sunset guessed to be feigned shock. “That’s absurd and quite frankly we’re insulted that you would even-!”

The two of them suddenly stopped. The girl in front of them was clearly upset, but there was something more. She had fire in her eyes, quite literally and the two of them suddenly broke out in a cold sweat. Maybe they were both imagining it, but at the same time they had this horrible feeling about what the girl would do.

“Um…you know…you’re absolutely right! The ring was on there long enough and we’re not sure what happened so…we’ll let you pick a prize!”

“I-I hope you can forgive us for jumping the gun there.” They brought out a green parakeet which Sunset took forcefully from them.

She then handed Twilight the bird. “Here, take it.”

“Um, Sunset-?”

“Take the fucking parakeet!” Sunset had shouted loud enough for most people nearby to hear as they suddenly stared at her.

Twilight quickly took the bird. “Sunset…”

Sunset suddenly blinked as she glanced around and noticed the stares the two of them were getting. “Um…sorry…I don’t know what came over me…”

“I-It’s alright…as long as you’re alright.”

“Actually…yeah I do feel better all of a sudden. You still up for that caramel apple?”

“Hmm…it looks like we got enough tickets to share one at least.”

“Fine by me.” The two of them then headed off while the two brothers, Flim and Flam, sighed in relief.

“Phew…I was worried that was going to end badly,” Flim said.

“You got that right brother…and I thought grannies were the ones to fear.” Flam then looked up and saw that they were getting stares still and went back to his prompt. “Would you look at that!? We finally got a winner over here! Who else wants to win a prize!?”

Author's Note

I'm not sorry.