“I-I can’t believe it. I have written so many, but…”

“Dude, you’re going to have to turn in your nerd card. You said it yourself after all.”

“But, but how was I supposed to know she was going to say no?”

Shining wondered the same thing as he strode away from his friends, heading into his room instead of to the basement with his friends. After all, he didn’t feel like going over a recap of how badly they had screwed up that night. Of how all they had ended up doing just to try to win him the princess had, well… Failed.

Closing his door, and only now hearing his friends begin to stop beating on Gaffer long enough to notice he had gone away from them, he sighed with a small smile on his face. After all, at least it hadn’t been a total party wipe. No, they were all going to be fine. It was just the paladin that got slayed.

Shining sat down on his bed, groaning as he rubbed the back of his head. He could already hear what his Sergeant would say on Monday. That this was nothing. That the princesses gave plenty of guardsmen ‘funny feelings’, and that was something he would just have to shove down into the darkest part of his soul, and drink it away every Friday.

And then he’d say it was just an example, Shining thought with a smile. It was honesty a common joke amongst the junior guards at school because of their Sergeant. Every member had to fall for a princess, but guards didn’t get with them. At best, maybe the captain, but that wasn’t happening until they graduated. That was just how things were.

Shining was the only one stupid enough not to believe in the old superstitions. To buy into the old beliefs that shit like him being a nerd mattered so much that he’d had no chance. After all, he never cared about that shit, especially when anyone told him that he shouldn’t hang with Poindexter just because he was low born, and Shining was from minor nobility himself.

Though, speaking of which, he heard the fellow nerd’s voice come through the door now as he said, “Hey, Shining, come on out. We don’t want you to be alone, and hey, Gaffer thinks he can even make a better campaign out of tonight. One where you can smash both the jock and the princess in their corrupted, demonic forms. Doesn’t that sound like fun?”

Shining chuckled at the idea, but it was hollow. The same sort of thing he normally did when he wasn’t feeling good and didn’t want anyone else to know. Not that was really possible when his chest hurt this much. When it felt like the demons had indeed won and ripped his heart from himself.

Honestly, more than anything else, he just wanted to forget about it. Forget about her. Not that that was going to be possible, seeing as she was an idol for the entire school, so someone was almost always talking about her. Add to that that she was a princess and his sister’s foalsitter...

He shut his eyes, one of his hands curling into a fist as he grit his teeth against the pain. It hurt. It hurt so much. It was also done now. Clear and cut, with the ring of “Sorry, but I don’t like you like that,” ringing in his ears. She hadn’t even treated it as anything that bad. Anything that special. Just another stallion that she’d needed to let down easy and then allow to blend into her crowd of admirers again.

It wasn’t anything new, and nothing he did would change it. Now it was time for him to figure out what he would do next. To him, that meant likely sleep. Lots of sleep. Like, the entire weekend spent asleep.

For his friends, it meant trying again to push him to do something. Anything. Or, in Gaffer’s case, what he knew best: Campaigns. “Hey, Shining, I know you don’t want to play, but maybe you could try, I don’t know, making your own campaign? Just… Let some of this out? You could even make it about you! I know I’d like a campaign where I’m the hero for once.”

“Then stop making bards, and maybe you can be useful to the party!”

“Bards are the best, Bit!”

Shining shook his head, sighing at the idea. After all, what did Gaffer expect from him? Some campaign where he gets Cadance? He tried that, and it failed, and Shining wasn’t… Entirely interested in a campaign where he got all the mares. Still, the idea of a campaign for him…

He glanced at his desk, not considering the fact that he hadn’t left his own Game Master’s notebook out when he had left, but something did call him to it. To just let himself enjoy some fun with old Ulfer, Hightinger. Yeah, jotting down some silly notes about his paladin being a… Well, being a paladin, sounded really nice right about now. Maybe even in a world that’s just getting sillier around him.

Yeah, Shining Armor liked that idea, and so sat at his desk, smiling at the book as he took to his pen, not noticing as either glowed.

Story Start: The world is in chaos after a secret ritual to set the world off kilter has succeeded for once. Chaos, clicks, and all sorts of nonsense normally seen in a high school are now widespread, taking over the world with their horrible ways and hate. Ulfer is set to make things right, especially since he was at the epicenter of it all. He got to see the princess herself killed. Her horrible, wretched, beautiful, wonderful, demonic, angelic

Shining stopped for a moment, blinking a little as he reminded himself not to make this about Cadance. To just… Just forget about her.

And so he turned his attention back to the book, getting ready to write about the first scenario, or big difference to world Ulfer found himself him, unaware of the fact that his words had much more power than he could have ever imagined.

Author's Note

So, a few rules as always:
1) Only one scenario and/or wish per day, so don't expect him to suddenly be able to read minds, be the ultimate magic user, and fight off an army of goblins all in one day.

2) As said in the description: Leave comments! However! As a twist, they do need to be adventure scenarios such as "Ulfer comes to a town where the mares are afflicted by a curse that has made all of them have at least D cups!" or "Ulfer finds a pool that is crawling with Sirens that are hungry for his flesh!" This way I can have more fun with the actual effects of them, and such like that.

3) He will never get the princess. Shining will never write that Ulfer gets the princess, so Cadance is off the table, in part so I can have fun with Shining outside of her.