Viva New Vegas

by ChAoS pOnY

Rating: mature
Tags: Gore, Dazzlings, Comedy, Adventure, Equestria Girls, Sex, Fallout, Sunset Shimmer, Random, Violence, Crossover, Death, Alternate Universe, Human, Narcotics
Length: 1577

The Mojave Wasteland is about to get a new courier it won't soon forget and her bestiest sisters are along for the ride for realzies.

The Mojave Wasteland is about to get a new courier it won't soon forget and her bestiest sisters are along for the ride for realzies.

Published 2018-09-06 15:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2018-09-06 15:10:01 UTC

What's Up Doc

"Ouchie!" Sonata said as she woke up.

"Ah, you're awake." a man's voice said before grumbling, "Maybe now your sisters will stop pestering..."

Sonata tried to do her usual jump out of bed with a smile but landed flat on her face with a "Double Ouchie!"

"Hey now, take it easy, you've been out a couple of days." The old man said as he helped her back onto the bed. "Do you remember your name?"

"Umm..." Sonata said before she heard Adagio.

"Don't worry, you can tell him." With that her two sisters came into the room.

"It's Sonata Dusk and I'm the youngest of the Siren Sisters." Sonata chirped up happily.

"Not what I would have named someone as perky and happy as you, but if that's you name then that's your name." The kindly old man said. "My name is Doc Mitchell and welcome to Goodsprings." He then got out his stethoscope and said, "Now hold still while I check you over before we try getting you back up again."

After a few moments of giving her an exam he said, "Okay, now I want you to get up slowly and walk over by that vigor tester machine, but take it slowly, it's not a...never mind." Doc Mitchell sighed as Sonata skipped across the room.

"That's actually pretty normal for her." Adagio told him as they walked over to the machine.

"That and pushing on a door for hours on end until one of us finally pulls it open for her." Aria snickered.

"Not to bright huh?" Doc Mitchell asked.

"Yeah, but lucky like you wouldn't believe." Adagio told him. "I mean what are the chances of getting shot near enough to someone who could not only save her life, but also fix our vocal cords as well. Thank you by the way."

"Think nothing of it, I'm just glad to help." He then turned on the machine and said, "Okay, now grab the handle and it will tell us if all of your dogs are barking."

Sonata grabbed the handle and giggled at the funny feeling in her hand as the numbers flipped over back and forth before stopping. "Huh, I guess you really are lucky." Doc Mitchell said as he looked over her stats:
Strength 7
Perception 3
Endurance 6
Charisma 7
Intelligence 1
Agility 6
Luck 10

"Now why don't you head into the other room and..." Doc Mitchell started to say and watched as she broke the handle on the machine when she forgot to let go of it.

"Give me that and go sit on the couch while I fix this you nut job." Aria said as she yanked the handle out of her hand and got to work fixing it. "I've got this Doc, it's not the first time or the thousandth that I've had to fix something she's broken over the years. I've kind of gotten good at fixing things because of her."

"Thank you." Doc Mitchell said before walking into the other room where Adagio had made Sonata sit down on the couch. "All right. I'm going to say a word. I want you to say the first thing that comes to mind... Dog."

"Play, but not the bad type of sexy fun time play that creepy guy wanted to record a holotape of me doing with the cute poochie he had before Adagio and Aria beat him up over it. Adagio, do you think Poochie was happy with that ranger girl who said she'd train him and give him a good home." Sonata asked.

"I think Ranger Wendy and Poochie are very happy together." Adagio told her before mouthing the words 'Don't ask' to Doc Mitchell.

"House"

"Making pancakes for my sisters every sunday morning." Sonata said as she licked her lips. "Folded in half with eggs and bacon inside so you can eat them like tacos, yummy."

"Night."

"Light... I miss Ms. Happy Blue Bunny scaring all the bad dreams away." Sonata said with a sad look in her eyes before she perked up. "But Adagio promised to get me a robot to chase the bad dreams away with a laser that goes 'pew pew pew'!"

"Bandit."

"The Sexy fun time party those meany pants Khans promised me before that guy in the funny coat shot me." Sonata said with a frown. "They still owe me a sexy fun time party."

"Light."

"The fuse on the fireworks because they're pretty."

"Mother."

"Biggest Badass Bitch Ever!" Sonata shouted. "You name it, Mommy beat the ever living fuck out of it."

"Do I even want to know about what type of childhood you had?" Doc Mitchell asked Adagio.

"No, you don't." Adagio replied.

"Okay. Now I've got a few statements. I want you to tell me how much they sound like something you'd say." Doc Mitchell said to Sonata. "Conflict just ain't in my nature."

"Super Nopers." Sonata said with a smile.

"I ain't given to relying on others for support."

"Super Nopers again." Sonata said before pointing to Adagio and Aria in the other room. "I always have my sisters backs and they have mine."

"I'm always fixing to be the center of attention."

"Super Duper Yes because we sing and dance a lot."

"I'm slow to embrace new ideas."

"Umm... I don't know."

"I charge in to deal with my problems head-on."

"Super Nopers again because that's how you get ouchies."

Doc Mitchell could already feel a headache coming on and was glad they were almost done. "Almost done here. What do you say you have a look at this? Tell me what you see." With that he held up the first card.

"A hallway with a door at the end." Sonata said before pointing at the bottom of the picture and said. "See there's the door right there"

"And this one?"

"Aria's sexy fun time toy, Mr. Buzzy"

"AARRGGGAARRWWW!" Adagio barely caught a screaming, infuriated, and blushing Aria before she could strangle Sonata.

"Last one before your sister kills you." Doc Mitchell said quickly.

"Two sumo wrestling bears high fiving each other because they're awesome." Sonata said before jumping off the couch and fleeing an enraged Aria.

"Before you ask." Adagio said "Yes, our mom did drop her on her head... repeatedly while drunk."

Author's Note

Sonata Traits:
Party Girl: Life is a party and everyone's invited. +15 speech, immune to addiction, +1 Agility due to your dance moves.

Sexy Siren: Male, Female, Trans, human or ghoul it doesn't matter you love it all. +10 damage to any sex in combat, opens up interesting dialogue with all potential partners/victims.

Slightly Cracked: Centuries of being alive have made you a bit unstable... Oh who are we kidding, you're completely insane and loving every minute of it. Enemies have -50% chance of scoring a critical hit on you due to how erratic you are, opens interesting dialogue.

Wild Wasteland: Wild Wasteland unleashes the most bizarre and silly elements of post-apocalyptic America. Not for the faint of heart or the serious of temperament.

Sonata Skills:
Guns 30
Explosives 30
Speech 55
Survival 45
Unarmed 30

Aria Special:
Strength 7
Perception 5
Endurance 5
Charisma 4
Intelligence 7
Agility 7
Luck 5

Aria Traits:
Party Girl: Life is a party and everyone's invited. +15 speech, immune to addiction, +1 Agility due to your dance moves.

Sexy Siren: Male, Female, Trans, human or ghoul it doesn't matter you love it all. +10 damage to any sex in combat, opens up interesting dialogue with all potential partners/victims.

Anger Issues: You're a ticking time bomb ready to explode. +1 Strength, +1 Endurance, -50% chance of getting a critical hit in combat, +25% chance of randomly being attacked, +50% chance of dialogue becoming an argument, you also gain an additional 65 hit points.

Hot Wire: To say you can walk into a junkyard and drive out in a rolls-royce is an understatement. +25 repair, you also happen to know the secret to actually getting a 200 year old vehicle up and actually running if you can find the right parts and enough flammer fuel or Moonshine. Unfortunately your anger issues means you're not a very good driver.

Aria Skills:
Lockpick 25
Melee Weapons 40
Repair 55
Unarmed 40
Speech 30

Adagio Special:
Strength 5
Perception 5
Endurance 5
Charisma 7
Intelligence 8
Agility 5
Luck 5

Adagio Traits:
Party Girl: Life is a party and everyone's invited. +15 speech, immune to addiction, +1 Agility due to your dance moves.

Sexy Siren: Male, Female, Trans, human or ghoul it doesn't matter you love it all. +10 damage to any sex in combat, opens up interesting dialogue with all potential partners/victims.

Lead Singer: You've kept your group together over the years and picked up plenty of skills along the way. +1 Intelligence, +10 Barter, +10 Speech, +10 science, +10 Medicine

Klepto Hair: Like your sisters you have issues, with you it's kleptomania and everything you keep in your hair. You can now carry +25 lbs. additional weight in your hair. +20 Sneak, +50% chance of pickpocketing the ammo from your enemies guns, +50% chance of concealing weapons in your hair, If caught stealing you can try to turn it into something sexual to cover it up in dialogue with a 50/50 chance of succeeding, but you will also be labeled a pervert.

Adagio Skills:
Barter 40
Energy Weapons 25
Medicine 35
Science 45
Sneak 40