I was spread out atop Rarity's duvet, mind drifting, when the door opened and the horse lady in question strolled back to the side of the bed. My head rose and I started to rouse but she shot me a little smile and a tiny shake of the head. In her hands were a soft looking flannel and a downy looking towel. Held aloft to her side was a washbowl floating by virtue of 'los magicos'.

“Don't you get up on my account darling, here, let me take care of you.” she said as she placed the bowl on her bedside table, placed the towel by my head, then moved to dampen the flannel in the bowl. “It shall take but a moment”

Rarity is many things, far too many to mention to be honest, but one of those things though is a nurturing sort. I laid my head back on the bed after giving a small nod and smile, getting one in return in addition to a boop on the nose. I closed my eyes as I was pampered by the silly horse woman.

There was nothing sexual about it, just gentle little strokes as she removed her own juices from my genitals and cleaned me up. Delicate little strokes that were punctuated with the dipping of the flannel back in the warm water and her ringing it out.

Perhaps it was her penchant for cleanliness, or a pragmatic wish for me not to drip on the polished wooden floor of her shop floor, but I certainly wasn't complaining. There is something just nice about having someone you trust cleaning you in such an intimate place. Even when her cloth dropped down below my balls and brushed the lips of my lady parts I couldn't help but relax. It wasn't leading to sex, it was that perfect post sex time where everything just seems a little better. The calm after the storm.

It only took her a couple of minutes before she was finished with the flannel and she proceeded to pat me down with the fluffy towel.

“I will have to head back to the store now Brian, now you can stay here a little and just let your stress melt away, ok?”

“I might just do that Rares,” I sighed out “my head's been pounding all day. I think I'm probably still a bit hung over from the party at AJ's last night”.

“Well then, you just rest your head and close your eyes and rouse when you want,” she said before she stood up and leaned over to place a little peck on my lips and give me a nuzzle and sniff behind the ear. “if you need anything I will just be downstairs.” Without further ado she turned and walked to the door, cleaning tools held in hands and majeek and clicked the door closed.

Now, life in horse land for me was a peculiar thing, let me explain. Don't misunderstand either, horses had their professions, but they just didn't have careers. There was no dead-end jobs, or first rung of a corporate ladder. Horses had a big thing about 'destiny' and there is no bigger sign of that destiny than the giant ass tattoos they generally get when they mature. This leads to horses living their lives bound to the role that their ass tattoo affirms. There isn't the slightest hint of any job searching, interviews, promotions and sackings. There isn't a job section in the local newspaper. If you have an ass tattoo that says one thing, that is just what you do.

And they don't just 'deal with it' by the way, each and every horse I have met loves their job.

Did you get an ass tattoo of an anvil yesterday? Oh well, head down to the local blacksmith and pull up a pew! That's your job now!

Did you get a shield painted on your ass? Well congratulations, you are now a Royal Guard!

It's simple and it works. I don't know how, it just does.

Now, what about those outliers who have no brand on their ass like me? Social outcast you say?

Nope.

These unlucky individuals (or lucky depending on who you are) are a certain class that is pretty rare, but not unheard of, but they are certainly not treated with any kind of scorn.

If anything they are given all the encouragement they need in the form of a generous stipend from the crown.

I am actually quite well off, truth be told.

Supposedly the money is meant so that the horse in question can travel and 'find their destiny'. It works of course, this is horse land. Every horse has a place. But for me? Well.. I pretty much lived my life drifting from one crappy job to another, anything to pay the bills. I never really had a job I actually liked, let alone loved.

So that leaves me new to the world, blank of flank and about as much money that I have ever had. I don't pay rent or a mortgage. There is no utility bills to pay or council tax. Every penny (or bit) is there just for me.

And these horses don't care what I do with it.

So my life, at least until I get some form of adornment on my arse (which remains to be seen) is pretty much that of a well off manchild.

I was a Lady of Leasure.

A 'Lady What Lunches'.

I had no pressing engagements, no appointments to meet. I had money in the bank and a beautifully plain arse on show.

It was pretty damn boring truth be told.

So I lazed about on Rarity's bed and let my thoughts drift. I didn't want to head out and catch the last vestiges of the lunchtime rush at the market so I resigned myself to a little snooze, nothing much, perhaps half an hour or an hour. I was pretty hungry but I ignored it, after all the only thing I had had to eat today had been Clothes Horses' meaty sausage with a side of tartare sauce.

I closed my eyes and drifted off.

I awakened not much later, a glance to the clock on the bedside table told me it was heading for two o'clock. Not bad. My head was still a little sore but nothing serious so I got up and put my kilt back on before heading downstairs.

Rarity was curled over a sewing machine joining two scandalously thin bits of fabric, I knew better than to bother her too much when she was 'in the zone' but I nevertheless walked up behind her and give her a kiss on the shoulder and peek over at her work.

“I'm heading out to get some scran pet, you fancy owt?, I'm probs going to head over to see AJ or Flutters after but I can bring something back if you want?” My accent slipped in a little to begin with but I was sure she knew what the fuck I was going on about.

She turned her head a little to rest a cheek against mine and patted me on the gently on the other. “Don't worry about little old me darling, my muse waits for no-pony, I expect after the lunch I had today my tummy shall be full for weeks”

“Yeah yeah, flattery will get you everywhere and all that” I chirped back at her. “catch you later sugar”

“Oh, you have most certainly already caught me Brian”

I gave her a chuckle as I walked to the front door “Don't work too hard, arrite?” I said as I went through to the street outside.

It was a baking hot day, sun blaring down, but a gentle breeze made it bearable. I needed to scarf some food so I committed myself to a dash of the Party Horse. Sugarcube corner was only a couple of minutes walk away so I put my head down and strolled there.

I didn't bother chatting to any of the horses on the way, it was pretty quiet and everyhorse seemed to have a place they needed to be. So I walked up to the door, braced myself a little in preparation and booled in.

A cast a quick glance around and I saw a few couples in the booths. Plenty of seats, so I wasn't going to have to take my bounty to the park or something. There is something distinctively disturbing about children in horse land frolicking about without a shred of clothing on that will put you right off any meal. I walked up to the vacant counter and could see the pink menace battering around a big lump of dough with her fists.

“Hey Pinks” I called over, her head spun around from her work as her trademark face splitting grin spread across her features.

“Hi's Bry's” she said as she started to bounce on her hooves, “what's occurin'” She rinsed off her hands before bouncing over to the counter like a weird horse kangaroo. Now Party Horse was a weird one, she totally freaked me out when I first met her, there is nothing in the world that will prepare you for her utter weirdness.

But after a while, it becomes your new normal. 'Its just Pinkie being Pinkie' is bandied around quite a bit, and it works.

She is a real short-arse, well below your average for a horse woman, probably around four and a half feet at most. You could never know her true height though considering her default setting is: 'bouncing off the walls'.

Literally.

Thankfully she was wearing her work attire so I wasn't given an eye full.

Ponk was the curviest horse in horse town, well aside from some of the older horse women that is, nevertheless she had a truly gargantuan set of tits for her tiny height. Also the biggest curviest hips you could ever see and a big plush ass that was as soft as one of those giant beanbag chairs.

She wasn't really my type to be honest, but tell your knob that when the softest ass you can possibly imagine is bouncing up and down on it. I wouldn't say she was obese or anything, but there was definitely a healthy layer on her that's for sure.

The poor apron she wore (for that was the entirety of her attire) strained and creaked at the bouncing motions her or mammoth mammaries, before abruptly she stood stock still and her eyes narrowed at me a little.

What now?

The next instant her hand shot to her nose and she pinched her nostrils. “PheeewwWWIE” she barked as if someone had just let out a particularly nasty wet fart. “Somepony's got it BAD huh?”

What?

“What?” my mouth echoed my brain.

“Didn't anypony ever tell you about the cake in the oven? Bry-Bry” She said in a sing song voice. “or is that the birds in the cake?” she tilted her head in thought whilst she brought a hand to her chin.

“What's going on Pinkie?”

She gave me another queer look and narrowed her eyes further before rattling off. “I was just pounding some dough to turn in to baps then I heard you and I'm all like 'HI BRY!' And you are all like 'HEY' so I come out here and” she shot forward in the blink of an eye and spread her hands so fast in my vision I didn't see them move “...POW! it hits me, well not hits me but it was like a wall, or is that a door” her hands dropped “and then you are all like 'wut' and I'm all like NOOO WAAAAY” she howled probably about five octaves higher than necessary. She waited a beat and recommenced her bouncing, although at a more sedate pace.

I was still in a state of utter confusion, not entirely against the norm to be honest for a trip to see the pink menace.

Before I knew it the world shifted and blurred and I was sitting in one of the more private booths in the corner, quite alone, with a pair hot cross buns in front of me and what looked like a mocha to the side. Well, when in Rome? I was still pretty hungry after all.

I can't have taken my second bite before a girthy pink leg wrapped around the partition between booths in a cheesy femme fatale manner. Next a shoulder and head, mane styled in an intricate sort of braid keeping her usually unruly mane back off her face and down her spine.

“Hey sweetie, this seat taken” she pointed to the chair opposite to me with a elbow length gloved hand.

“Go ahead Pinks”

“Well thank you kindly sweetie” she breathed out as she brought the rest of herself around the partition. She had somehow managed to conjure a strapless floor length black dress out of thin air, split scandalously beyond her hips and barely containing her breasts.

Pretty standard Pinks to be honest.

She walked past the offered chair and swung herself around before planting her padded posterior on my lap, both of her legs pointing back towards the centre of the shop, her back to the window outside. One of her silky gloved arms wrapped around my neck and caressed my mane, and the other pulled what looked like a cigarette holder with cigarette attached at the end out of somewhere, which she brought to her lips.

And blew some bubbles .

I mean, I know this kind of behaviour should be throwing up some red flags, but honestly... Pinkie.

I once came in here and I swear on my immortal soul, she was using a ladle to spoon chunks of a jam filled sponge cake in to her face.

Dressed as Ripley from Alien.

“What's a little cutie like yourself doing in a lowdown drinkin' den like this” she purred.

I had learned long ago that it's easiest just to roll with the punches instead of getting confused.

“Just came in for a bite to eat”

“Well you just keep yourself seated here honey, and aunt Pinkie Pie will clear everything up for ya” she used the p's in her name to puff my mane out of my face.

“Right you are then” I said as I took a bite of the bun, struggling to chew properly as my chin was nestled on the arch of her right tit. A couple of crumbs sprinkled her cleavage.

Look, if she is going do this she can't expect everyone to put their lives on hold.

She let out a sultry chuckle. “Such a mess, you really are a dirty little filly” she said as she wriggled her cushy tushy.“Now, comes a time in everyponies life where they are ready to take the plunge” she purred in to my ear “don't you feel it sweetie pie”

“hmph”

“Don't you feel that burning ache, just like you are ready to explode” she snaked her spine and gave out a shiver that rippled from her juicy mounds right down to her juicy arse. “tell me it aint so, sweet cheeks” she said in faux surprise “you aint never been in season before, have you now” She pressed a slow kiss to my temple.

She giggled.

What...

For a moment my heart stopped beating and my mouth dropped open. Pogo Horse leapt up off my lap and bounced around the table and appeared in front of me in her usual work apron. “Silly Brian, you're in heat! I can smell it a mile off!”

I gasped in a breath.

“I bet that you have had more than one pony sniffing around you today, eh? eh?” she giggled out as my brain caught up. “Had yourself a good cream stuffing yet? The first time is just the BEST, better hurry though your first heat is only a couple of days!”

I sat there utterly still, bun half way to mouth.

“Well three at most, but usually two!”

Then it clicked. Everything fell in to place.

I was craving meaty dicks, my mind was awash with the thought of being pummeled. It all made delicious glorious sense now.

I was absolutely not a cock whore!.

It was my stupid horse body doing this to me! I mean, fuck, nobody goes to bed one day being sexually repulsed by a man sausage then wakes up the next and does a full one eighty. How didn't I piece this together myself.

Then other thoughts pushed themselves in to my mind unwittingly.

Rainbow had woke me up this morning with her rod on full display. She MUST have known. Why didn't she tell me?

Was... was she trying to take advantage of me?

And Rarity, she was more than eager to scratch my itch.

Was SHE trying to take advantage? A horse in heat walks in to her store and not thirty minutes later she is rolling around in her bed?

My mind misfired and all of a sudden there was an emptiness in my stomach that was nothing to do with my hunger.

My mind drifted to the cleft between my legs and I could feel it. There was a tingling flittering like feathers up and down my labia. I could feel the moisture there as I squirmed in my chair and my lips brushed against each-other.

My mind drifted away again in a dizzying haze to thoughts about the horse people and how they manage their heat.

With their spouses. How could I have been so naïve?

Am I horse married? Did I unknowingly get hitched to some horse meat without ever realizing? Who are my horse wives?

Rarity and Rainbows faces immediately flashed across my vision. Followed by a select few others.

Twilight and her dorky grin.

Applejack and her stoic facade.

Fluttershy and her girlish smile.

Pinkie?

I looked up at the pink lunatic for the first time in what could have been an hour. Her happy smile and her bubbly demeanour.

No.

The answer came in almost an instant. I don't know why but I knew it for certain. She was one of my closest friends. Probably as close to being family now that I had long since resigned myself to the fact that I was never getting home. This was my home now.

“Pinkie” I said as my thoughts began to clear “do you think of us as being...”

“Oh silly Bry Bry, who would take care of all the single ponies if we were in a herd”

I ignored Pinkies admission that she single handedly serviced a whole towns worth of single ponies in heat to bring my thoughts back inward again.

A herd, that's what they call horse marriage.

When did that happen? Did I just drift in to this? Was there any signs that I totally missed? I must admit, as many similarities as there is between our body language there is as many inconsistencies. That's without adding in wings and scent. That left me with my usual answer to what to do when I don't fully understand. Was it all just... Lost in translation?

Ask.

But I'm fucked if I am going to ask this loon sitting across from me.

I plucked a coin from the fold in my kilt and mentally assigned two horse people. Sun side was the Work Horse, moon side for Butterhorse.

I flicked the coin, caught it in one hand and slapped it on the back of my other hand.

"Gotta head out Pinkie, thanks for the buns"

I was walking through the middle of Horseville with a purpose, I needed answers, unfortunately I was certain that the only answers I was going to get were going to be fairly cryptic from the horse I was heading to see. At the very least I knew my destination and I held on to that.

A blue blur caught my attention in my peripheral vision and before a moment passed Speedy Horse was setting herself down in my path.

“Hey, Bry”

I shot her the look but she was already glancing down at her hooves and kicking at a stone.

"So, I woke up and you were gone” she looked in to my eyes scratching her forearm “what's up with that?” she gave a couple of shifty looks over her shoulder seemingly looking to see if she was being watched before she darted in and gave me a chaste kiss on the lips. “what are you up to huh? R'you ok?”

I took a moment to form my words.

In the space of about ten seconds I had gone from slightly pissed at her, to really looking at her.

She looked vulnerable. It was so out of character for her that I thought for a moment I had stumbled upon her antipodean cousin.

But it was undeniably her. I knew her as well as just about anyone can know anyhorse. And I knew that she wasn't taking me for a ride. I was hers and she was mine. It was clear and defined. There was no maybes or could-be's about it.

This was a horse woman who was just looking after her herd.

I was simultaneously weirded out and flattered. It brought back a little warmth to my belly and a smile to my face.

“Hey Skittles, I'm fine” I said, “just out for a stroll, paid a visit to Rares” and before she had a chance to get away I leaned over and kissed her on the cheek causing her to blush uncontrollably.

“Bry!”

“Got a couple of things to do today I reckon though, probs going to kip at the hobbit hole this evening, you don't mind?”

“Nah” she shrugged “just don't want you to be alone is all, you had me worried for a minute” she pushed her bangs behind her ears “not that I worry or anything, you know. Monsters or something” she amended swiftly “you want me to fly you somewhere?”

“You know I'm scared of heights you mad horse, plus I just fancied a bit of fresh air”

“Yeah yeah, slow pony likes to walk I get it”

“I'll catch you tomorrow, alright?”

“Sure Bry” and before I had a chance to embarrass her further by sneaking in a full tongue frenchie she was off.

I honestly don't know what I was expecting. I had allowed myself to brew a tasty broth of indignation, and I still didn't know whether my hormones were dulling my mental acuity but a conversation little more than a few minutes helped to still the waters of my thoughts.

First of all I was a horse woman.

Second, I had a mighty man spear.

Third I realized I was horse married to perhaps more than two horse women.

Fourth I was going to speak to the rest of my suspects to see who I had actually managed to hitch.

Finally I realized that my sudden urge to take a thorough pounding in the flaps was most likely due to a biological soup of enzymes and hormones and I absolutely was not going to get stiffed until at the very least my mind was clear and my heat was over. If ever.

I sidled on up the the hobbit hole about an hour later. It was a good thirty minute walk in reality but I was not in a rush. The extra time gave me a chance to ruminate on both the weirdest, and surprisingly, one of the nicest days of my life. I didn't think that I could handle AJ right now, she can be pretty intense shall we say. Her bedroom behaviour can be pretty full on and I really didn't need that, the fates saw fit to turn that coin on the moon side so Butterhorse's doorstep is where I landed.

I knocked and awaited the usual “just a moment” from the other side then waited for the half dozen latches to be released.

Fluttershy's willowy face peeped through the crack just beneath the chain that was still engaged. “Hi Flutters”

The door closed slowly, a little rattling later and it was opened wider this time. “Oh, hello Brian, I was not expecting a visitor today” she whispered out “come in”. I noticed a tiny flaring of her nostrils as she beckoned me back in to her warren.

Now don't get me wrong, Timid Horse is not a slob in the slightest, but her home has a, how shall I put it. Yeah, a lived in feel to it.

It is ostensibly a cozy little cottage. Or perhaps it was at one time, before; animals. There are bundles of fur and feathers everywhere. Every shelf, the mantle piece, walking around downstairs is like using stepping stones to cross a stream. If I didn't know any better I would assume that she is related to Noah. But apart from that the place is actually spotless. There isn't a pissy animal stank to the place. Every exposed area of floor glistens and her thankfully clear sofa and table are spotless, nary a stain. Fluttershy is a homebody in every sense and she takes care to take care of her things.

I space hopped over the slumbering animals, I am not really a animal person so couldn't name them all if I tried, but there was at least a couple of squirrels tucked up to a dog and all manner of mice and hamsters. When you have been here long enough they all seem to fade in to the background and become part of the furniture, like the crystal ornaments my gran always loved so much.

I plonked my arse on the sofa and caught her eye.

Fluttershy was a tiny thing. She had a delicate willowy frame. Some would say, probably cruelly, that she was skinny and could do with a good feed. She had slender legs and slim hips leading to an even slimmer waist.

She had little perky breasts barely hanging over ever so slightly visible ribs. Long slender arms. Her collar bone jutted delicately under her slim neck and her face. Her features were stark, high cheek bone the other obscured by her full bodied flowing pink mane. Her jaw angled down in to a delicate point.

She was the horse equivalent, I suppose, of one of those size zero models that people seem to always bicker about. Honestly, a skinny lass isn't my cup of tea usually, I like a little padding in my ladies.

Really though, this was Fluttershy. This was just how she was, I couldn't and wouldn't judge her like that.

And she was beautiful, she really was.

Her timid demeanour and her shy little smiles. Eyes flicking to the floor whenever you caught them. It just all added to the person that I loved so much, foibles and all. She is also quite tall, if you could manage to straighten out her posture a little she would not be far off eye level with me.

Her wings fluttered as she drifted down beside me, hooves on the sofa. I raised my arm wrapped it around her shoulders allowing her to sink in to my side and rest her head in to the crook of my neck. Her mane drifted down over my horse tits and spilled on to my lap, hiding her face.

Days at Fluttershy's house could be spent simply doing this. She is by far one of the most tactile ponies I have ever met. If you ever get her out of her home she will be plastered to your side with her fingers wrapped around yours.

It's nice.

Really nice in fact.

“Hey Flutters” I murmured as she settled in to place. “Look, I know this is probably going to sound a little weird and all, but are we, y'kno, like in a herd?”

She didn't speak, not that I was surprised about that, although she did reply. She raised her head, held eye contact for a moment, gave a little girlish squeak and blush, then delicately brushed her lips against mine for only a moment before settling herself back down against my side.

I'll take that as a yes then.

Author's Note

No horse fadge battering this time around, this was more of a filler. huehue

Also tidied up previous chapters a little. Not much changed, cosmetic stuff really.