Fluttershy’s Final Words

by Silver Shadows

Rating: teen
Tags: Fluttershy, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Death, Sad, Suicide / Self Harm
Length: 2259

Ever since that wicked Friendship Journel was released, Fluttershy felt depresssed. It became worse and worse until she decided to go...

Fluttershy, Element of Kindness, had been depressed for many years. She had never gotten the courage to meet a therapist and it had been swallowing her whole. Since the Friendship Journel had been released, she retreated further and further, until she had isolated herself in her cottage.

Published 2018-08-06 21:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2018-08-06 21:20:01 UTC

Last. Day. Here.

It had been a long time since her last suicidal impulse that was triggered by Rainbow Dash downplaying her the entire time they were going to the dragon’s cave. As much as Fluttershy saw the weakest side of herself, seeing Rainbow, her absolute best friend, continue to speak behind her as if she wasn’t there, had hurt her. Fluttershy still held onto it today, however, she didn’t think much about it. It had been a long time and Rainbow had apologized to her afterwards. That’s all that counts, right?

The Friendship Journel was released this very day and Fluttershy was faced with mobs and mobs of ponies wanting to hurt her. Fluttershy heard every single one of their insults and remembered them, each one stabbing her in the heart like a needle stabbing her. Each little insult, all the way from before Flight Camp, was a stab that continued to repeat over and over again. She was sick of them and she doubted that she would be able to stick up to them if she was a time traveler, even though she had faced a hungry manticore before.

Fluttershy hummed, “A true true friend helps a true true friend...” She wondered if telling her friends would help before deciding against it. Her friends didn’t need to see her be more of a weakling than she already was.

Fluttershy couldn’t stand it anymore. The shouting outside.

“Fluttershy is the worst! I hate her so much. Does she seriously have to learn a lesson twenty times in a month to let it stick for one bucking day?” A pony outside shouted.

She looked down and sighed before quickly locking all of the windows and she turned to Angel, “Oh Angel, I’m so sorry... I’m sure that Twilight can take care of you. Now, please Angel, go outside and don’t come back until I call you back.” Angel pouted before he hopped out the door. Fluttershy shut the door behind him quickly.

She blinked a few tears out of her eyes, took some pieces of paper and a quill.

Shakily, she started to write,

Dear Twilight Sparkle,
I’m sure that you came in and saw my body. If you didn’t, then... I’m sure that you’ll see it soon. Please please please don’t examine my body to see how I died. It’s an easy way and I don’t want any other ponies to go the way I am going to... Or did, by the time you read this.

You’re a really really good friend and nopony needs to prove that. You’re the Princess of Friendship! I’m just myself... the Element of Kindness. I’m sure that my element will choose another bearer in the future. If you’re allowed to choose the next bearer, I’m sure that he or she would be the kindest spirit there ever was before. If you can take care of Angel in the meantime, I would appreciate that a lot.

Love,
Fluttershy

Fluttershy was surprised to find teardrops slipping off of her muzzle, dropping onto the paper. She quickly cried on the nearest sofa, none of her animals there to really comfort her. She had told them sternly to go. Her sobs grew louder before she sniffled, not wanting any creature to hear her and find out about what was going on.

She took the second piece of paper and trembled as she wrote

Dear Rarity,
You’re the most generous creature that I have ever come across. When I need anything, no matter what it is, you would do your best to give them to me. I was very surprised when we went to Manehatten and you gave those ponies so many things- just for free!

Please don’t mourn for me. I want you to look your very best every single day, okay?

Love,
Fluttershy

P.S. Rarity, please tell my parents that I’m no longer here...

Fluttershy carefully put the paper next to Twilight’s before sobbing again. She hadn’t even thought of her parents. She felt selfish for leaving them but selfless for leaving the world, to leave room for her critters. Her brother would likely use her bedroom as something else but that was okay... besides, it wasn’t like she was going to use it again.

She started writing the next one
Dear Pinkie Pie,
Please be happy. I am choosing the move on by death, and frankly, that’s the only way to escape this life. I don’t think your Pinkie Sense can sense a pony about to die by suicide so don’t blame the sense, especially since everypony’s laughing around you and things are a little strange.

I know that you’re going to host the funeral party and I want you to. I had written my will a long time ago, just to be safe. The mayor has the copy. Please make sure that it’s read and done.

You’re a really really good friend and you have the talent to make every creature smile. Even Angel likes you and you’re easy to be with. You’re funny and encouraging. Please don’t lose this because of me.

Love,
Fluttershy

Fluttershy set the paper next to Rarity’s and put the next one in front of her. She smiled a little as tears slipped off of her muzzle. Her funeral. She would never see it but she knew that Pinkie would make it the ‘Bestest Funeral!’, in Pinkie’s words.

Dear Applejack,
Stop drinking cider. I know that you are because you just saw me, didn’t you? I want you to make sure that Rainbow Dash doesn’t drink it because of me either.

You’re the most honest pony I’ve ever met in my life. You are strong, not just physically, not mentally too. Never break that spirit.

Also, if you can round up the animals around my house and send them to the animal sanctuary, I would very much appreciate it. Besides Angel, I asked Twilight to take care of her.

Love,
Fluttershy

Fluttershy knew that the letter didn’t feel finished. She wasn’t completely sure of what to write. She didn’t want to mention the bats, especially when that wasn’t a good memory, and she didn’t personally hang out with Applejack enough to really know her as well as the others.

Last letter. She gulped.

Dear Rainbow Dash,
You’re my best friend. You always stand up for me when I’m too scared too and I could never ask for a better friend. You’re loyal and I would always expect you to have my back.

I wish that you’ve seen the signs but I’ve been depressed for a long time, bullied by my younger brother when I was young and then at Flight Camp, even before you’ve met me. Also, I am very very shy and when I had been you, well, I act the same way, don’t I? Please live on for me.

If you’re reading this to Tank too, tell him that he’s the best tortoise (not turtle, Rainbow) that I’ve ever had.

Your best friend,
Fluttershy

Fluttershy looked a tough her last letter, the letter that she had signed differently and set it next to Applejack’s letter.

She used some rope to bind her wings. She climbed to the noose and tied it, her rear hooves balancing on a chair.

Three...
Two...
One...

She kicked the chair backwards.

3 days later...

Three days later...

“Where’s Fluttershy?” Twilight asked. They were in her castle, the five friends seeing one another. It had taken three days for the crowd to calm down and move onto the next thing, whatever that may be. They were still popular, after all, their whole lives were pretty much in the Journel that everypony had read. They were in the throne room, each one of them sitting in their rightful seats. Only one throne remained empty, the butterfly mark on it faded.

Applejack took another glance at Fluttershy’s throne, “Ah’m worried. Ya know how that gal is when there’s a crowd. The thing Ah’m worried is about her throne.”

Rainbow flared her wings, looking worried, “We’ve gotta find her!”

Rarity sighed, “As much as I think that breaking into her cottage is an unladylike thing to do, even I must admit that I am indeed very worried for her.”

Pinkie spoke quickly, “Oh. My. Celestia. What is Fluttershy has been eaten by a hungry manticore that isn’t going to threaten all of Equestria? Or-Or eating cupcakes and getting fatty meat? Or maybe Fluttershy was secretly depressed and killed herself?! Ahhhhh!”

Twilight said calmly, “I doubt that that had happened, Pinkie. We’re her friends and I’m sure that she would’ve told us if she was depressed or in danger from any of her critters. Besides, she an animal expert and probably would be able to handle it better than any of us. However, I do agree that we should go to her cottage and find her.” The five quickly trotted out of the castle, keeping their heads low from the rest of Ponyville. Apparently, dolls were the new trending item in Ponyville. Nopony really knew why, but there wasn’t a single pony that questioned the strange nature of Ponyville.

Fluttershy’s cottage was much more different than any of them had seen. They all stared at the cottage, flabbergasted at the sight of it. There were critters running around. Some were dead and there were less critters than any of them expected, so some had to be eaten by the others. The grass around the cottage was gone and there weren’t any plants. The birdhouses were tipped over and birdseed was scattered everywhere on the ground, with the birds hurriedly grabbing as much food as they can before flying away so they wouldn’t get eaten.

The cottage’s windows were shattered into pieces and there were a couple holes in the wall. None of the walls were big enough for a pony, so it seemed like insects were making their way through to eat whatever they could get.

Applejack voiced what they were thinking, “What is Equestria happened to this place?”

Rainbow knocked on the door, “Fluttershy? Fluttershy! Hello? Is anypony in there?”

Twilight opened the door with her magic and trotted in, “Fluttershy? Flutter-oh no...”

She hesitated before trotting in and saying, “Girls... Come in.” The others quickly trotted in and they gasped when they saw Fluttershy. Fluttershy was held us by a noose and her head was half off due to the tight rope around her neck. There was dry blood on the floor of her cottage.

Twilight was the one to snap out of it the quickest, “Everypony, we need to find what happened. Are there any papers around here?”

Applejack pointed to a desk that had five pieces of paper, “There’s some over there.”

Rarity levitated the papers the her and gasped, “Oh my. They’re addressed to each of us.” She levitated the paper to the pony it concerned.

Twilight nearly dropped hers after she read it, “She.... She killed herself.” Each of them cried after finishing their letters and they went their separate ways.

Pinkie’s hair was completely flat as she spoke with the Mayor. She trotted to the Cakes and asked for a day off before heading to her room. Wait, Fluttershy wants the bestest funeral! I will fulfill it!

Twilight flew to her castle, her eyes watering as she spoke to Spike about it. Spike quickly wrote a letter to Princess Celestia about Fluttershy’s death. The ruler replied quickly, saying that she would be there the next day.

Rarity had cast a cloudwalking spell on herself and borrowed a balloon, informing Fluttershy’s parents before completely breaking down in tears.

Applejack went to her farm and true to her word, she didn’t drink a drop of cider. She felt like a Fluttershy would be proud of her.

Out of everypony, Rainbow was taking it the hardest. She regretted teasing Fluttershy for her shyness and she should’ve spotted the signs a long time ago and helped.

The mayor called for everypony’s attention after a day, when Pinkie finished decorating for the funeral (don’t question Pinkie), “Good afternoon everypony. I have come with grave news. One of our dear friends has died. Many of you have corresponded with her I believe. Her name was Fluttershy, the Bearer of Kindness.” A few cries went out.

The mayor paused for a minute to let the news sink in before continuing, “I will now read her will:
Last Will and Testament

Fluttershy // Over 18 // Citizen of Ponyville
I am creating this will with a clear mind.
This is my last will and this will would revoke any other will created by me.

I want Rainbow Dash to be the executor of my will. If Rainbow Dash cannot carry out the contents of my will, my alternatives will be Twilight Sparkle and Pinkie Pie. Under any situation in which Rainbow Dash needs help with, I want any of my friends to help her with what she needs to complete it.

I wish for Treehugger to be the heir of my cottage along with any critters. If she cannot be found in any case, I want the animal sanctuary to have the animals and the mayor to decide what to do with the land. I have a drawer of pictures and a journel in my closet that I want Rainbow Dash to inherit. Rarity will inherit my dresses. My books will go to Princess Twilight Sparkle.

My pet, Angel Bunny, will be the responsibility of Princess Twilight Sparkle.

Signed by Fluttershy
Witnesses: Treehugger , Zephyr