Glitchy Treasures

by locke_jaw

Rating: everyone
Tags: Alternate Universe, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Random, Slice of Life
Length: 4327

Just a short story with a bit of an RPG feel to it...

An Adventurer had just fought a real hard battle causing him to deplete all health, mana, and potions. And he can't go back to town now or else he'd risk another encounter. But at least he got this magical jar that may contain some legendary treasure inside, right? Or a health potion at least...

Published 2018-08-05 04:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2018-08-05 04:00:01 UTC

Persistent Glitches

It was a bright a sunny day. A Merchant was trotting happily in the plains of the Hipaine Grassland. His coin purse jingled heavily with each step of his hoof. Even though it’s not noon yet, he’s gonna call it day. Well maybe do a bit of restocking of his wares first when he steps into town and after that, just hang out at the pub for a while to grab a cold drink or two.

He was just a couple of miles away from the town of Rybbonie when he spotted a small figure from afar. He approached it, although carefully, to take a look.

From what he can tell, it looked like it’s an Adventurer. He’s just sitting there on the grass, probably knocked out or something. That’s a weird way to lose your consciousness, he thought. He slowly approached the unconscious Adventurer.

Seeing folks like them get knocked out in the middle of nowhere, and maybe on the verge of death too is not an uncommon sight. It’s like a way of life for these ponies now. Though things like these usually happens to those who prefer to do their adventuring solo, or the ones who haven’t joined a party yet. But still, even a party of Adventurers get conked up at times. Sure it rarely happens but still, it happens.

Once the Merchant got close, he noticed something come out of the Adventurer. It was his existence cubes. The small glowing blue blocks of life were coming out of his back and fading into the air. He looked like a puzzle slowly disassembling itself away piece by piece.

The Merchant looked above the Adventurer’s head to see what’s causing this. Two images can be seen: the first one was a small yellow square with a lightning bolt inside while the other was a purple square with of bubbles of the same color at its center.

Keen Hornet sting, the Merchant quickly concluded. The Adventurer was currently suffering from paralysis and poison. He can’t move a muscle and the poison was slowly eating him out.

With a swipe of his hoof at the air, the Merchant’s inventory screen popped out. He selected a cureall potion on the screen and a small vial with green liquid inside flew its way out of the Merchant’s bag and into his hoof.

The Merchant popped the vial’s cork and poured all of its contents into the Adventurer. Once the green liquid has soaked his body, he gently glowed and the abnormal statuses that were floating on his head disappeared.

The Adventurer suddenly gasped loudly. It was the typical reaction after somepony woke from being paralyzed. Anypony would easily get startled by that reaction, but not the Merchant. He’s so used to pouring that potion on dozens and dozens of adventurers that the best response he can give was a slow, bored blink.

“Oh Goddesses.” The Adventurer sighed as he looked up to the Merchant. “Thanks for the cureall. It’s not every day you get to see an adventurer give away free stuff.”

“Actually I’m a Merchant. And that’ll be a hundred bits.”

“Geez. What a way to wake up.” The Adventurer grumpily retorted as he opened his inventory screen. He selected ‘bits’ and typed in the amount he wanted to give the merchant. After the adventurer closed his screen, an array of gold coins swiftly flew out of his coin purse and headed straight into the Merchant’s.

The Merchant heard a beeping sound followed by an image of a small circle with an exclamation point at the upper right corner of his vision. With another swipe of his hoof, a notification window popped out telling him that he received a hundred bits. Transaction Complete.

“Well, if it hadn’t been for me you wouldn’t have woken up at all.” He quickly replied. The Merchant looked down at the Adventurer who was still sitting on the ground. He didn’t know why he just noticed it now but apparently, the Adventurer was holding a jar, a magical jar.

It was pretty weird considering that those things only appear along with monsters during encounters and would later vanish if they’re not broken before the fight ended. And yet this Adventurer right here was holding one, in his hooves.

“What’s up with the jar anyway? I thought those things disappear when they’re not broken in combat.”

“I know right?” The Adventurer replied, almost shouting. “I snatched it after my fight with a Keen Hornet. And now I’m here holding it tight, never letting go. It might disappear if I did.”

“Well, it’s a wise decision. Considering that you’re hugging a metal class magic jar. How are you going to break it though?

The Adventurer scratched his chin with a hoof before answering. “Which reminds me, do you have any magic hammer for sale? My physical attacks are useless against this thing. Even my criticals only shed one point off of it!”

“Uh...” The Merchant looked away before continuing. “I’d love to sell you my wares, but I just ran into this raiding party at Muvin Vine Forest. So I’m pretty much sold out in the moment. Except for that one cureall of course, must have missed one. Lucky for you, eh?”

“Really? Not a even single health potion?”

“Those red bottles always go first. I’m selling bits though. I could sell you one for the price of two.”

The Merchant giggled softly. “It’s a joke, I’m joking.”

The Adventurer crossed his forelegs on the jar’s lid, resting his head on them after. “Great. How am I gonna get to Rybbonie now? I’m just an encounter away from joining the Goddesses’ dining table.”

The Merchant swiped a hoof to open the Adventurer’s profile. A small blue square appeared in front of him showing the Adventurer’s name, class, attributes, level, health and mana bars. He ignored the other details and just focused on his health and mana. He’s right. The red bar on his health gauge was so low that even a measly slime could deliver him the killing blow.

His mana gauge doesn’t fare well either. It was all depleted that there’s no blue bar anymore, just a long black rectangle replacing the spot where the blue bar should have been. Defeating a Keen Hornet isn’t that hard, is it? Even he, whose level really isn’t that high could easily vanquish those hornets with just one swing of his mace, and he’s a merchant so fighting really isn’t his forte, so why can’t he when he’s supposed to be the adventurer here?

He looked at the golden square beside his health and mana gauges to see if his level matches the area he’s currently venturing in. The Hipaine Grasslands is only suited for adventurers of level twenty and up and his level is...

“You’re still at level twelve? What are you doing in Hipaine? You should’ve stuck with Lopaine, slashing slimes and goblins and stuff.”

The Adventurer shrugged. “What’s the difference?”

“Well, the fact that the syllables ‘hi’ and ‘lo’ are attached to the word ‘paine’ is one. They call this place ‘Hipaine’ because the monsters in this area deal high pain damage. Seriously, every town here is named after their most distinct characteristics. Like Rybbonie is called like that because its main export is ribbons. And don’t get me started on Muvin Vine Forest.”

The Adventurer raised his head in realization. “Huh, that’s why it took me everything to take down that one Keen Hornet. But at least I have this magic jar in my hooves. Who knows, it might contain awesome gear or something, or a freaking health potion.”

“I still can’t believe you’re doing something that’s never been done before. I mean, it’s just impossible.”

“I thought so too. But then that got me thinking, with me holding this jar and all. Pretty impossible, I know. But what if, just what if? That this world, just our world...”

The Adventurer gestured on the patch of grass beside him, drawing a circle in the air repeatedly to emphasize his point.

“...particularly in this area, is having a glitch? Just a small one, not really damaging. Heck, not even worth waking the legendary heroes to save the day. Just small scale, very small, but nevertheless, a glitch?”

“Where are you going with this?” The Merchant said, raising a brow.

“With the flow, I guess.” The Adventurer replied, forelegs rising slightly as he shrugged. “Let’s just imagine that this glitch is a small tear in our fabric of existence. It’s no bigger than a freckle so there’s no universe-wide consequence when we tamper with it. And by tamper, I mean to rip this lid off without the necessary magical tools.”

The Merchant scoffed at the line. “Ripping it right off with your hooves?”

The Adventurer nodded.

“Just your hooves?”

The Adventurer nodded again.

“You’re being delusional.”

“I would’ve agreed with the sentiment too if I were standing on a different situation, but the proof is sitting right here on my lap! An existing loophole, just waiting for us to bypass it and reap its rewards! Don’t you want to see somepony do something impossible today?”

“Nah, I’m more curious about what’s inside the jar.”

“Oh yeah, that too. Well, you’re welcome to stay if you like.” The Adventurer turned to look at the jar and proceeded to rub his hooves in anticipation. “Now excuse me while I pop its cap right off.”

The Merchant found himself a nice spot patch of grass to sit on while watching the odd spectacle unfold itself in front of him. It’s not like he’s doing anything interesting today anyway so why not burn a couple of sunlight to watch somepony do something stupid? It’s much better than hanging out at the pub at daytime.

He can already hear the Adventurer’s grunts and pants as he continued pulling the jar’s lid off with his bare hooves. To shelter himself from the heat of the sun, he pulled out a large umbrella from his inventory, and stabbed the hard end on the ground to make it stand.

The next thing that came out from his bag was a piece of sandwich that he made this morning to eat for lunch. The hefty combination of bread, meat and vegetables has enough healing properties inside it that can restore fifteen health points once consumed. Not that the Merchant needed it since his health bar was already full but he can still enjoy it as a hearty meal.

Sounds of frustrated grunting and pleasured munching can be heard as the time passed by in the Hipaine Grasslands.

Once the Merchant was done with his meal, he topped it down with a mug of cider. Chugging down the contents until half is left and then leisurely sipping the rest. This is what he really liked about magical inventories, you can put something like a mug of cider in it and it’ll never spill and ruin the other objects inside. Plus, the beverage still tasted cool and refreshing after hours of containment.

With mug in hoof, he looked at the struggling Adventurer who still hasn’t made any progress with the jar whatsoever.

“So how’s that loophole faring?” The Merchant began. “Tighter than expected, I presume?”

“Smaller...” The Adventurer replied, still grunting as he continued pulling the jar’s lid. “Than a...needle’s hole.” He raised both his forelegs, giving up. He looked at the Merchant, who was now hoofing him a mug of cider without getting up from his spot. With his horn, he levitated the mug off the Merchant’s hoof and directed it to his. He thirstily drank the rest of the cider. Once the beverage was fully consumed, the mug exploded into tiny bits of existence cubes and faded into the air.

“I never thought it’d be this hard. But then again, when are things easy?” And with that, he continued to pull the lid off again.

“You better give up while it’s still early.” The Merchant said. “Everypony knows that you can only shatter a magical jar with a magical hammer. Or at least, a continuous surge of physical attacks.”

The Adventurer ceased his actions. “Now that’s a thought.” He pointed a hoof at the merchant. “How about you...” “He then pointed the hoof back at him.”Help me...” And then he pointed at the jar. “Break this vase? Uh-I mean this jar? Break this jar?”

The Merchant slouched and narrowed his eyes at the Adventurer. “Well, I’d love to, but my services aren’t free.” He said so while caressing his imaginary beard.

The Adventurer scoffed. “So what, you’re a merc now?”

“I put the ‘merc’ in merchant son! Seriously, I’m joking. I’m a merchant, earning money is what I do best.”

“Of course it is. So what are your terms then?”

The Merchant leaned in closer. “I want half of what’s inside that jar. It doesn’t matter what the content is, I want half of it. If it’s bits, simple. Divide it by two, give it to me and you. A rare potion? Consumable, or any of that stuff? Funnel it down into two containers. Legendary gear? Two options, you could transfer the effects to your current one and I’ll just take the shell, still worth a couple of bits in certain markets. Or we could sell it altogether and split the profits with each other. So, what do you say?”

“You’ve been meaning to say that for a quite a while now, haven’t you?”

“Since you’re pulling that lid off like a mad stallion, yeah.”

The Adventurer sighed. “Well, I’m in no grounds to make any conditions in my current state but, can I at least request something small before we seal the deal?”

“Technically, it’s still a condition. But as long as it’s small, sure I’ll hear it out.”

“I promise to you, it’s a really small request. I just want you to take me to Rybbonie safely.”

The Merchant snickered a bit.”Don’t you think it’s a bit ironic? A merchant accompanying an adventurer? If it’s the other way around, it’ll trigger an escort quest. Okay. It’s a deal. Let’s shake hooves as a makeshift contract that will seal this agreement. That way, you’ll lose karma points should you instigate a betrayal against me.”

“Really?” The Adventurer doesn’t know if he should feel praised or offended. “Betray you? In my current condition?”

“Just upping my back.” The Merchant raised his hoof, the Adventurer followed. The two engaged in a brief hoofshake to solidify their deal, at least morally.

The Merchant opened his inventory and pulled out an iron mace. “Now the jar?”

With the metal jar in his lap, the Adventurer couldn’t do anything except look away.

“Be gentle.”

The merchant stretched his hoof, the one that’s holding the mace to his back as far as he could. Certain that it could no longer stretch any further, he hurled it back to his front as hard as he could. The mace approached the jar at great speeds. Gusts of air spiralled around its sharp tip as the momentum increased while its distance from the jar decreased.

And then, contact!

The attack was so strong that when the mace hit the surface of the jar, it created a loud clanging sound. It was so loud that it echoed throughout the grasslands. A large ripple of air was formed afterwards with the merchant at the center. It was a critical strike. It’s a critical strike at the first blow.

The Merchant rested his mace on his shoulder. He looked smugly at the jar and its cowering owner who has now closed his eyes and had his forelegs covering his ears. That jar will be nothing but a pile of existence cubes soon. He thought.

Something popped out of the jar. It was a large number. All crafted in sparkling gold, a color befitting to that of a critical strike. It has a large golden bar floating beside it.

“Minus one point!?”

The Adventurer openly laughed at him. He just looked so epic a couple seconds ago. He can’t restrain himself. He just can’t help but let out an overwhelming amount of mirth after a flop like that.

Annoyed at the Adventurer’s reaction, the Merchant whacked the jar again, and again, and again. But the results were still as pathetic as the first one. They were either a minus one or a miss. Sometimes the two would alternate, sometimes one prevailed the other. But still, all of them were pretty pathetic.

“Dang it, why isn’t this working!?” The Merchant cried. He was now starting to get exhausted and really frustrated.

“It’s a metal class magic jar, what do you expect?”

The Merchant ignored the Adventurer’s words and gave the jar another round of whacking. The Merchant was using both of his hooves now. He was standing on his hind legs, hitting the jar with his mace like a miner would with a pickaxe.

After releasing that much hits, the Merchant scored another critical strike.

“Finally!”

It was another minus one.

“Goddesses dang it!” The Merchant cussed out while furiously slamming his mace into the ground.

“What’s your level again?” The Adventurer asked the Merchant while he’s on an impromptu break.

“I thought my level of twenty-seven would be enough for thi-”

“Twenty-seven!?”

“Hang on, hang on.” The Merchant interrupted back while picking up his mace. “I’ve got something.”

Powerful energies were starting to gather inside the Merchant’s mace. A heavy aura hovered around the weapon. With each passing second, it gets heavier, the pressure becoming thicker. But the Merchant doesn’t mind any of it.

The mace started glowing red, like heated metal. Then the light began to throb. It continued throbbing, like a heart, a metallic heart. The red glow’s pulsations grew rapidly, as if it was going to explode. The skill was ready. With his body flowing with magic, the Merchant leaped several hooves up the air, much to the Adventurer’s horror.

“Hey, hey, hey! I’m way too close for that skill! I’m way too close!”

“SEISMIC SMASH!”

Like a meteor, the Merchant dove straight down the jar. A large explosion erupted not a second later. A thundering roar resonated everywhere. Clumps of earth rose up from the ground. Clouds of dirt surrounded the Merchant and the Adventurer like a brown mist. Due to the strong impact of the force, a large crater formed on where the Merchant has landed.

It was followed by a short moment of silence, only to be interrupted by the Adventurer’s violent coughing fit.

Dust has filled his eyes to the brim and he swore he could taste dirt in his mouth. “What were you thinking! Using that skill when the target is sitting on me! Thank the Goddesses it’s not a freaking AoE!”

“So how’s the jar?” The Merchant waved a hoof in front of him to help clear out the cloud of dirt.

But his question doesn’t need to be answered. As the dust cloud finally vanished, he got a good look on the metal jar. It was still intact. Aside from the dust and crumbs of earth clinging into it, it appeared to look like it’s never been scratched at all. Once more, another set of numbers came out from its top.

It’s a minus one, again.

“Motherbu-that’s it. I’m emptying my mana gauge on this thing.”

The Adventurer perked up upon hearing those words.

“What!? Don-”

TWELVE SKILLS LATER...

The Merchant was now panting heavily. His mana gauge was drained dry. He can barely keep his right eye open and was now using his mace to support himself or else he’d plop down. He looked at the jar again. It still looked like it was before he unleashed a plethora of spells and skills on it.

“Criticals,” He panted. “One point. Skills, one point. Criticals in skills, one...freaking...point. Seriously, how tough is that thing? It’s just a metal jar for the Goddesses’ sake! A glorified trash can, that’s what it is! I-”

Before he could continue his rant, the Adventurer cut him off.

“Hey take a look at this.” He then turned the jar around so that the Merchant see could what he discovered.

There was a chink in the jar. A small part, just about the size of a bit was chipped away after being rained down by the Merchant’s skills. But that’s not the most intriguing part. There’s something coming out from the hole. They look like small black cubes, slowly floating away from the jar, and fading into the air not a second later.

“Black existence cubes? That’s completely unheard of.”

“It’s the glitch!” The Adventurer cried out in glee. “Quick, use another skill.”

“I can’t. I’m spent.”

“Then shove the handle on that mace of yours and use it as a crowbar!”

“It’s too big, it won’t fit.”

The Adventurer giggled softly. “Innuendo. The old-fashioned way it is.” He looked at the Merchant, gesturing him to assist. “Come on, you signed up for this. Help me pull the lid off.”

“I see no benefit in doing this. It’s all wasted effort.”

“Help me anyway.”

The Merchant finally relented and helped the Adventurer pull the lid. “Alright, I’ll help because I’m bound to do so. Normally, I wouldn’t do something like this due to the fact that we’re repeating a failed cause. Do you know that quote about insanity? I forgot most of the words but it goes a little like doing something again and again and hoping for the outcome to...”

The lid snapped open, knocking them back due to the sheer force of their pull.

“Change...”

That was the last word uttered by the two before they were silenced by a giant beam of light piercing through the sky. The beam came from the recently opened jar. Even though it’s still midday, everything around them slowly faded into black, the only thing that can be seen was them, the jar and the giant beam of light.

And all of sudden, feathers rained down upon them. It was like the first days of winter. They look like snow, taking their time in their descent. It truly was a magnificent view, calming even. And to make things even better, another figure came down towards them.

It was bright, almost as bright as the sun, but not entirely blinding when one would focus their eyes on it. It was wearing a gown, a long white gown. Its fabric already reached down the ground even though its wearer was still halfway there. It also has wings, wings that were as big as an Alicorn’s, maybe bigger. They were slowly fluttering, making loud flapping sounds with each wave they make. Its mane sparkled like gold, and almost as long as the gown its wearing. The locks were moving freely, like golden gracious tendrils that swayed beautifully as the wind moved around it. Above its head floated a golden halo, the glowing ring shone on the figure’s head brightly, adding more to its celestial presence.

It was definitely an angel. The two unanimously concluded. The details speak for themselves. But the real question was why did an angel go down from her celestial realm just to meet a couple of mortals?

The angel gave them a smile. It was a benevolent smile, with a hint of pride. It’s not that she was proud of herself but more like she’s proud at the Merchant and Adventurer like they’ve done something noteworthy.

“Brave citizens of this world.” The two mortals melted a bit at hearing her voice. To them it sounded like butter and heaven, buttery heaven, or heavenly butter. Anyway, her voice sounded divine.

“You have stumbled upon one of the hidden challenges the Goddesses have set on this land. The challenge that you just completed teaches you about a lesson in Persistence. Persistence is the quality that allows an individual like you to continue doing something or trying to do something even though all odds are against you. A quality needed to stand against the Demon Lord. And the prize for completing this challenge is enough experience points to propel yourselves five levels up.”

After hearing her speech, the two felt a huge amount of power welling inside them. And the ground that they were standing on glowed yellow. The glow then turned itself into a bright beam of light that’s shooting upwards. And above their heads, a colourful display of words formed saying the line ‘Level Up!’

Notification symbols appeared on the upper right corner of their visions. They then swiped their hooves to open the notification window. They read what’s inside and found out that they have learned new skills. The Adventurer learned a skill called ‘Moon Fang Heaven Piercer’ while the Merchant learned “Hard Bargain II.”

After the two finished checking their new skills, the angel continued.

“That’s it for now, brave citizens. Until the next completed challenge. And may you never cease, until you achieved peace. Farewell.”

The angel then made her way up the heavens again, but this time faster. Once she had disappeared into the clouds above. The giant beam of light coming out from the jar dwindled away like a blown out candle. Everything went bright again. The sky was back and so was the grass.

But the two just stood there, still dumbfounded.

“That was...” The Adventurer said but paused halfway, still searching for a word that will describe what they’ve just experienced.

“Legendary.” The Merchant finished his sentence for him.

“The contents, could be too.”

The two looked at each other before rushing towards the opened jar. Their faces were bumping against each other just to have one eye get look at what’s inside.

Their eyes shrunk down the size of small dots at what they’ve seen.

It was a magic hammer.

“So, you wanna split it?”

Author's Note

Reading this story is also a challenge of persistence...
Thanks for reading.