Air escaped from Mind's bottle with a loud hiss, the sweet strawberry milk tickled his taste buds and quenched his thirsting throat.

"But yeah, I've figured out what I'm going to do now."

"Oh?" Snowy replied with a raised eyebrow.

"I'm going to take some time to myself. A year, maybe two at most, just to enjoy baby time. Just to recuperate from this whole thing. And then I'm going to go back to college and I’m going to get my doctorate. And after that, I’m going to work for a couple of years, then I'm going to ask Mantra to marry meeeee!" The last word of his sentence was simultaneously an angry groan and Mind mashed buttons on his controller out of mild frustration. "Dude, fuck this guy."

"Do you think Mantra would be willing to wait that long for marriage? You know how mares are with this shit; they always want to tie the knot right away." A smirk spread across the pegasus’ right cheek mid-sentence.

"I'm surprised your first question wasn't something along the lines of 'Marriage? Are you crazy?' Haha." A hoof then sent the controller sliding along the floor to Snowy. "Your turn to try to kill Gatling Gun Guy." The controller sat right where it was instead, letting their adventure run with their character standing still, being unable to actually pause the game.

"We've been friends for years, Mind. I can already tell you’ve thought a lot about this. I guess it was a bit early to ask you before; the situation was a bit different and new things were happening."

"Yeah, that meeting really helped me realize that what's in the past is in the past. I may not have my magic anymore, but I still have my knowledge, and I can still help ponies and do society a great service. Now, you know originally that I wanted to be an NP-”

“Yeah, I was about to ask what made you decide to get your doctorate.”

“Well, I really thought about how much time Mantra and I have to spend our lives together. Becoming a doctor would be significantly lengthier, but what is a decade in comparison to a century?"

"Well like I said," Snowy said upon setting his sippy cup of apple juice back to the floor, "you know how mares are. They usually want to tie the knot as soon as they can."

"Well, good thing Mantra isn't a usual mare.”

“I still can’t get over what you told me your psychology professor said.”

“Oh yeah, when she practically was giving dating advice in class; when she said that mares who are eager to get married are the ones who want to have more sex. ‘High risk, high reward’.” The two then courteously laughed the story off. “You know, realistically I could get my doctorate as well as the title of ‘wizard’. Well wait, without my magic… What would that be called? A PhD? Maybe a ‘PhD in Magical Arts’?”

“A PhD sounds about right. But hey, if you're truly happy with Mantra and sincerely want to do this, I fully support you." Snowy held up his cup. "To friendship~" And the bottle met the sippy cup, the plastics making a clunk to commemorate the moment.

"I do have a question I've been meaning to ask for a while though, Snowy: What is this place?"

"Still in Ponyville, just in a small community on the east side."

"That's not entirely what I'm asking."

"I know, I'm getting to it. Right before the whole mind control thing, Daddy told me about this small ageplayers community, but it didn't really gain a lot of popularity until after you went missing. Or rather, after Mantra abducted you, I guess. When I told you about it, there was only Patty’s shop, but now there are a couple of adult sized baby swings at the park, at least last time I checked, and that carnival we went to so far, but everyone in the community is very supportive of the lifestyle, especially with the support of Twilight, Rainbow, and all of them. It's a paradise in the works, but it's a paradise nonetheless. I can't wait to see what it becomes next summer."

"Next summer?"

"Well, I don't plan to stay here forever. Don't you remember I'm going north for field training? I love being a little, but Daddy and I have lives too."

"Right, of course. Sorry, I guess with all that's happened, some memories still-"

"Don't apologize. Anyway, Daddy has a summer home here now, so I'm coming back every year to spend three months with him as his little. Maybe I can convince Clan and Glam to swing by after their tour with Iron Maiden."

"Well, I'll be here every time you come back. You're not mad at me, though? I know we planned on going into work together, and I feel bad throwing a cog in the wheel."

"It's perfectly fine, dude. Don’t worry about it. I didn't expect you to follow through with all that's happened. Besides, I doubt you want to get your doctorate and basically end up doing EMT work."

"Snowy, you're the best friend a unicorn could ever ask for."

Smooch~ Ninety-nine. Smooch~ One hundred. Mind kept wiggling, many crinkles elicited from underneath his blue hooved sleeper. Smooch~ One hundred and one. Mind was nervous when he told her his plan, but he was quickly melted into a bubbling babying mess to hear approval that he somewhat already predicted to pan out perfectly.

"I think that's a great idea. Two years with my baby sounds great to me; time wouldn't be so precious if there never was an end. In fact, I think it's perfect! I'll take extra special care of you, and teach you how to eat on your own, and how to sleep in a big bed by yourself, and how to drink from a big colt cup, and potty trai- skip that step~" Mind couldn't even pretend to protest with how much she pushed his buttons with that one. "In fact let’s skip all those steps~ And then when the two years are up, I'll take you to Ponyville for school every morning, and pick you up every afternoon, and help you study, and every time you come home, I'll put you in front of the screen with dragon paws, or in your bouncer, or in a playpen." Mind could only wiggle in excitement, wearing a smile that he couldn't wipe away.

Those with ambition often find themselves troubled with what they really want to do with their life, and will even develop the impression that achieving their biggest dream is all or nothing. Ambitious infantilists are often torn between two dreams: What they want to accomplish to make an impact on the world, and what they want to do to fulfill their most intimate fantasies. Waking up every morning staring at one’s diapered self surrounded by vertical bars is magical. Waking up every morning knowing one has made his/her mark on the world is also magical. Waking up every morning staring at one’s diapered self knowing he/she made his/her mark on the world is a magic like none other.

"As you count sheep, remember that you are only a helpless little foal." The pink mare said, tucking in her pacified charge and spinning his mobile. Mind fell fast asleep with a warm smile and an overwhelmed heart. Being a doctor was far down the road. For now, he was just a two-year-old, and he needed Mantra to care for him.

Mind woke up one morning deciding to lower the drop side and hop out of the crib on his own. His sleeper-ensnared hooves made the floor creak on his way out of his nursery, and the smell of bacon graced his nostrils. He followed the scent through the hall and into the kitchen. Mantra turned her head from the stove with a smirk.

"Hey, how'd you get out of your crib?"

"I was lifted out by the smell, like a cartoon." He closed the distance between his caregiver and himself. "What am I having for breakfast?"

"You mean you don't want eggs and bacon?" Mind gave her a half-incredulous head tilt. "Seriously, I think you're ready for a real breakfast; a little colt like you sweet enough to take care of his mommy deserves it… But of course I'd be more than happy to keep giving you Foal-At-Heart carrots if you really want~"

"Nah, I need my other food groups, Mommy. I think my body is well-supplied with enough beta-carotene and vitamin K… For the rest of my life."

"I hope you like your eggs scrambled." Mind stepped in very close and gave Mantra a long kiss on her cheek. His raised tail lowered back into place with the smacking of his lips.

"Scrambled is perfect. I'm going to go watch Dragon Paws." Mind then started to walk away quickly.

"Hey, you're not slick." Mantra said, beginning to give chase into the living room. "Get back here, stinkybutt!"

Later that day, Mind woke once more from his afternoon nap. He stretched and a kiss was planted on his head by a mare who lay beside him.

"Did you have a nice nap?"

"I love you so much~"

"Aw, you're so sweet~" She gave him another kiss and started pressing her hoof against his rear end, eliciting crinkles against a clean pant. Mind looked into her eyes, surprisingly unchanged in color, smiling at her. “Nothing?”

“You’re awfully eager to have another messy diaper on your hooves… More than usual, I mean.”

“I’m just being diligent.” Mind then grew a dubious smirk. “Oh, you know the real reason why.” She then started ruffling his mane.

“But I want you to say it.”

“Well,” she said, her irises still refraining from fading into pink; this would be an answer that came straight from her heart, “it’s a reminder that you still need me. To make sure your bottom is clean. To tell you it’s a perfectly normal thing to do. To comfort you, and to care for you… For the rest of your life.” The blushing stallion giggled in response. “And I promise to love you and care for you forever, my sweet little foal.”

And care was what Mantra committed herself to do. Days passed by slowly, each loving moment between the two seeming to last forever. Every feeding, every change, every nap, every bedtime, every outing, every playdate. They were all the most intimate moments Mind, and Mantra had together, and while they had sex to show for it once in a while, the real power at work was the innocence and love the two felt for one another. And they would continue to spend the rest of their lives together, having nothing but the best of times.

“Come on, do what I say! Begone! Kill yourself! KILL YOUR SELF!” His voice rang across a black void in tandem with another voice he couldn’t make out. He heard it once more, a bit clearer that time. He figured out to whom it was calling out to and then he heard it again.

"Mind, wake up!" He awoke in a cold sweat and tears started to stream down his face. His dropside was lowered, and Mantra climbed into his crib and held him tightly. Mind couldn't even find the words to say to her, his breath taken by sobbing that she had never heard from him before. Her eyes were a deep turquoise as she stroked his mane.

The stallion lay before the screen, only facing the wall, his thoughts bound and constricted by what was plaguing his dreams. Mantra wrested him from his sulking position and pulled him into another warm embrace. She telekinetically floated a pacifier toward his grasping mouth while assuring him that he had nothing to worry about, and that she sent a message to someone to make sure of it. It didn't take more than a few seconds of nursing on the nipple for Mind's thoughts to settle, and he would carry on the rest of the day like usual.

There was only one pony Mind could logically deduce for Mantra to contact; Mantra's special connection with her, as well as her duties of the night, made it too obvious.

"As you count sheep, remember that you are only a helpless little foal." Mind managed to have a pleasant nap earlier that day, but the real test was a full night's sleep. The circling mobile above him proved itself more powerful than the sense of apprehension that would've kept anyone awake at night.

The red-maned pony stood before a wide wavy celestial path that led into a white pillar of light peeking out from space-dye darkness. Falling off the path would most certainly lead to a perpetual fall into the cosmos. Mind knew his adversary awaited his next attempt at reaching the light.

“Mantra told me I was slacking.” A voice said to him matter-of-factly. A dark blue mare with a royal blue enjeweled mane faded in beside him, facing the light. She wore a crown, a broach, and a mark on her flank all as black as night.

"In fairness, I don't blame you."

"It's my duty to help everypony in need regardless of how you think I feel about you.” Mind attention was gathered, sensing her statement as genuine. “Looks like your task is simple: Reach the light and you’ll be rid of these nightmares once and for all."

"The task isn't the problem. The problem is what stands before it." Upon his statement, a towering silhouette of a unicorn sparkling in a sky blue aura blocked the bright path.

"Princess Luna," the silhouette boomed with Mind's voice paired with a lower-pitched, bone-chilling, demonic filter, "what a pleasant surprise. You too will get to witness my power first-hoof."

"Yourself." Luna said, also matter-of-factly, starting to walk toward it. "Makes sense."

"No," Mind replied, "this is the piece of shit I used to be."

"I can see why you were struggling with this." Luna's horn then started to gather light. "I'm banishing this nightmare to the gap between dimensions~"

"You will do nothing of the sort!" The silhouette said. Upon his command, a beam of white lightning shot out of the mare's horn, missing its large target as if she were aiming at something else entirely. The beam soared through the cosmos until it faded out of view. "Collapse! Lie down and remain still." With her aura quickly fading from her horn, Mind watched Luna fall onto her side before he ran toward her to inspect her motionless body. Her face wore a panic that could make one’s hairs stand on end.

"I can't move…" She gasped for breath. "I can't move!"

"And now let's play~ How about we start with some nerves? Oh, how about the cervical ones first? Poke~" Luna writhed and screamed in agony, unable to move herself in any other manner.

"Stop it!" Mind pleaded at the silhouette.

"Stop? This is what you wanted."

"No, I don't!" Upon which, the silhouette induced another agonizing scream from the helpless mare before them.

"You're denying it in front of her to save face. You wanted the blood of the Royal Sisters and of Twilight and her friends, and you would've done anything to get it."

"No, that was never what I wanted." Another stomach-turning scream filled the depths of space. "I'm a pacifist; I never believed violence to be the answer to anything in my life."

"But you also believed in the prevailing of justice. You truly believed they were heroines and that they stood to make the world a better place. But then one day they betrayed you, they vilified you, and they took everything away from you, and you wanted nothing but to make them face justice." A sky blue aura matching the one shrouding the silhouette wrapped around Luna's head and neck. "Let this be the first testament to the injustice that you faced."

"NOOOOOOO!"

Mind sent himself careening into his crib bars. He lay trembling with Princess Luna's screams echoing through his head. Not only her physical screams, but the utter despair, helplessness, and anguish she felt before the merciless monster rampant about in his dreams. She most certainly would've been killed had he not awakened sooner… But did he truly even wake up in time?

"Mommyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!"

Mantra could only provide her hooves and her uncertain assurance that Luna was unharmed, to such uncertainty Mind made note of. Mantra endured a myriad of her sobbing lover's cries that the monstrosity in his nightmares killed her; that he killed her. Thankfully for both of them, Mantra received a message from Celestia at the crack of dawn: Luna was shaken quite a bit, but unharmed.

"Maybe we could take you to a nurse or Ponyville General and get you some pills for these nightmares or something." Mantra said as she taped the shaken pony into a fresh diaper.

"Well, nurses aren't allowed to prescribe drugs, first of all." Mind said. "Second, it's unknown as to what our bodies do during sleep, let alone dreams." Mantra lifted him off the changing table then started weaving a brush through his mane. "Getting over nightmares is more psychological than anything. Subconsciously I still feel guilt over my powers and I just need time to get over it. I don't think there's much more that can be done, especially since even Luna failed to stop that thing."

"You said that there isn't much more to be done. That means that there are some options. At this point, we should try anything. So tell me everything you think is possible."

"Well," Mind said with a hoof to his chin, "I did develop a spell that allowed me to function without sleep whatsoever, but it's very intricate and complicated. It requires an absolutely delicate and precise magic touch like mine that I don't think anyone else has." He lowered his hoof, stood himself, and followed the pink mare through the hall and into the kitchen.

“Well, my baby isn’t going without sleep. We’ll save that option and only use it if we have to.” Mind then watched himself be lifted and his crinkling butt pressed against the seat of his high chair.

"There are medicines that could reduce the amount of REM sleep, like antidepressants. Pharm was a blurry subject for me, so I don't know exactly what kind would help. But even if they did help, it'd only be a temporary fix; my body would eventually develop a tolerance to it."

"Princess Twilight Sparkle owes me a favor. Maybe amidst her research she found a remedy for this. Or maybe you could even teach her a spell. Maybe even the sleepless one if you have to."

"As well-versed in magic as she is, her touch would have to be microscopically precise. I don't think she'd be able to perform any of my spells."

"We could at least go see her, right?She did figure out how to break your mind control spell afterall, right?"

“Yeah, she did… I don’t suppose there’s any harm in that.”

An alicorn with a purple coat rubbed her temple at the very thought of it. Usually the violet-maned mare would be ecstatic to learn and try new spells, but the very nature of Mind's magic left her precarious and hesitant.

“I’ve never tried using magic on something I couldn’t see before.”

"Well, how did you break my mind control spell? Which I'm still very sorry about, by the way."

"I had to change the spell on every single pony I treated, but basically it helped cleanse the pony of any magic present in them that wasn't their own. Nightward actually helped me develop it."

"That makes sense. It's kind of like a blood transfusion."

"I guess you could put it that way. How does this ‘wakefulness’ spell of yours work?"

"The spell keeps adenosines from attaching to the receptors. Adenosines are the neurotransmitters that, when they attach to their receptors, cause sleepiness."

"And you did this to your own brain?" The winged unicorn asked incredulously.

"Yep. I guess we both share a love of ambitiously using magic." Mind then gave an awkward chuckle.

"How well would you trust me doing that?"

"It took me years to master my techniques. Breaking my spells is one thing, but you have no experience touching things at microscopic level, and you need to be able to touch and manipulate tens of thousands of neurotransmitters at once."

"Yeah, I’m not attempting this."

"Yeah, I didn't think you would. Don’t get me wrong, you’re a very talented magic practitioner; I wouldn’t be able to teleport to save my life, but my spells are a bit unordinary.”

"I know a spell that can possibly stop the nightmares, but dreams are more Luna's department, so I haven’t really tested it for long-term effects on the psyche."

“We’ll do it.” Mantra said, speaking in Mind's place and giving Twilight full permission to do it. Mind didn't protest and he lay on a table cleared off for him, waiting for the magic to overtake himself.

"Just close your eyes and concentrate on your breathing." The stallion did as the princess said and lay stiff on the table and started to feel a magenta magical grip overtake him.

"What does this do, exactly?" Mind asked her.

"Well, it's supposed to help you sleep soundly at night."

"But he's not having trouble falling asleep." Mantra interjected.

"No, it makes sense, Mommy. Remedies for sleep disorders also apply to nightmares."

"They're not different?"

"They are, but they aren't."

The conversation was abruptly ended by Twilight as she requested silence for concentration. Mind allowed her spell to course through him, giving him a lift in his spirits, but results wouldn't be seen until later that night. He began to relax, counting up in his head while imagining Twilight's spell as a soft white light flowing throughout his body. But while her soothing spell did its work, her mild inner anguish was doing work of its own.

"Alright, that's that. I could also recommend a shop that sells magical dream catchers, but that's all I can do."

"Thank you very much for your time, Twilight." Mantra said while helping her partner off of the table. With Mind to his hooves once more, he took a deep breath before speaking again.

"There is one more thing you could do for me, Twilight." Her head turned curiously. "I'd like for you to tell me how you're doing," her head tilted, "because I know you’ve been feeling uncomfortable around me."

"Considering all that’s happened, I've been pretty okay." Her heartbeat fluttered terribly, beating like a drum against Mind's thoughts. "Well, I guess I am a little nervous; I never showed up to your forgiveness meeting and was a little worried you'd be mad about that. But the truth is that I didn't show up because I was so tired; I had a long night the day before. There’s never really a dull moment being the princess of friendship, especially these days." Twilight Sparkle, despite what she was saying, was ironically an open book to Mind: She was truly unsettled being around him, even further so upon him pointing it out.

"No, I understand. We all have lives, and I don't expect them to halt just for me. But since you weren't there, I do want you to know how truly sorry I am for all the trouble I caused."

"It's really alright." Mind had to hold back a reactionary head shake.

"You know, I think I can help you with something. You said your spell flushes outside magic out of the pony's body, but you had to change the spell depending on the pony. Your magic had to help the antibody response to push out my control, but at the same time, your magic needed to be unaffected by the same response. I can give you the name of the blood bank where I donated all the time; I’m type O-negative, so if you remake your spell using the magic in my blood, you won't need to remake the spell ever again… Just in case another pony happens to discover the same method I did."

"You really think that would work?"

"Like I said, your spell is like a blood transfusion, and O-negative is the ultimate donor. Our blood and our magic have a lot of similar properties given the parts they play in giving us life. You're more than capable of harnessing control over such properties."

"Of course~ I could probably even further my magic studies with that. I think you should pay all my friends a visit for closure. Just to show them that you're really not a bad pony."

"I think that's a wonderful idea~" Mantra said with a hoof stroking her charge's mane.

"Yeah… It is…" The red-eyed stallion reluctantly concurred.

"I think it'd help with your nightmares if you knew that they forgive you just as much as Celestia and I do."

"That's not a bad idea at all."

As much as Twilight said she forgave him, and as much as Mind wanted to point out his ability to detect lying, he withheld. He knew she was genuine in wanting to forgive and forget, but it wasn't something one could do in an instant, or even in a day. Especially with how much anguish he caused to those close to Twilight; her mentor, her brother, and her best friends were all victims to new levels of terror by his hoof. Twilight unfortunately also had a history of preaching about second chances, but giving them out selectively; something that Mind was confident she had learned from since, but the fact still remained.

On Mind's suggestion, Mantra accompanied him to Ponyville General. Uncomfortable silence was all that was between the two in the waiting room. Mantra gave a sigh before striking conversation once more.

"You know, you have to face the rest of them eventually."

"And I will, but it's too soon."

"This is not something up for debate, little foal." Mind hesitated at first to answer to her firm condescending tone, but the vanilla-dominant nature of the situation forced him to retaliate.

"I will face them, but let's at least see if Twilight's spell works before I do."

"Yet you're eager to see this doctor."

"It'll be worth it, Mommy. Trust me."

In the corner of the doctor's office sat Mind giggling while being enticed by Mantra's magic bathing the bead maze beads before him. Toys in doctors' offices usually weren't very fun, even for actual foals; the charm of being a foal playing with toys in a doctor's office served to work wonderful magic. Mind couldn't help but blush when the doctor opened the door and let herself in. A white mare with black hair. Her pink eyes and pink glasses examined Mind down and up; her gaze stopped at the fluffy garment around his flanks, then again at his head.

"Your horn is gone."

"Yeah, that's a long story."

"Well, you have me for the next half hour. Take a seat on the table and lay it all on me."

"Well, you might already know most of it."

"I might." Mantra then stood herself beside Mind to introduce herself while the pink-eyed mare prepared her notebook. "Mantra? Nice to meet you too. I'm Dr. Peculiarity."

"So, Mind was rather insistent on seeing you particularly."

"Yeah, Mind was seeing me when he first started exhibiting the symptoms of his control spell."

"Yeah, I'm sorry I lied about that." Mind replied.

"I don't blame you." The doctor said. "And I most certainly don’t blame you for skipping your last appointment. But that’s in the past. So tell me what's going on now."

"Well, I've been-"

"Let Mommy tell her, dear." Mantra interrupted with a hoof to his lips, his mouth sat as a centerpiece between two fiery cheeks. "He's been having recurring nightmares, and we're convinced that they're not normal. What we can do?"

"It is possible that these nightmares could be a result of something physiological, possibly by horn removal even. In fact, let me take a closer look at this." The doctor helped herself to parting Mind's mane to closer inspect the spot where his horn was. Mantra physically winced, but went unnoticed to the doctor, and brushed off swiftly to Mind’s ESP. No scar, nor keratin, nor any sign of a horn previously being there were present. "Well, with the way the horn was removed, there's no way of knowing for sure if it's even the cause of your nightmares. I assume you can't feel, Mind? I mean, feel your brain... With your magic."

"No, I don’t have any of those powers anymore. Well, except for my ESP, actually."

"Oh, so you did develop an ability after all."

"Yeah, I guess I'm cursed with being a special case." Mind said with a light snark. "But since I don't have magic to feel my brain anymore, is it possible I could get another MRI?"

"Absolutely. The soonest I could schedule your appointment for would be in a week, but it's no problem. Did you want to just do the MRI? I can schedule a CT as well."

"Uhm… Yeah, let's do both, actually."

"Out of curiosity, Doctor," Mantra said, "if there were a way he could get his horn reattached, would it help him at all?"

"There's no way of knowing for sure. There are still a lot of things about magic that we really don't know, despite how far science and nursing has come. If you are able to reattach it, you should wait until after the MRI to do so."

"Is there anything you can do until then?"

"I can't prescribe anything without a certain diagnosis, but I gave Mind some antidepressants a while back specifically to depress magic during sleep. You could try those if you still have them. Otherwise, we'll have to wait until after we get the MRI results before I can prescribe anything else."

"Okay…" Mantra said, somewhat disappointed while knowing there wasn't much more the doctor could tell her. "Thank you for everything, Dr. Peculiarity."

Underneath the shade of an umbrella, Mind was enjoying a strawberry ice cream cone, courtesy of Mantra; his reward for going through two appointments in one day without hassle, like a good boy.

"Thank you for the ice cream, Mommy."

"You're quite welcome, sweetie."

"And for covering me for the tests."

"Hey, I can't expect a foal to pay his own health insurance, can I?" The two shared a couple of chuckles briefly.

"Listen Mommy, I know you're worried, and I really appreciate your concern for me. And I know you want us to try everything right away, but let's rope it in for the day. Let's at least see if Twilight's spell was all I needed." Mantra feigned a response contrary to how she felt.

"You're absolutely right. If what we try tonight doesn't work, then we'll have something new to try tomorrow."

Truthfully, Mantra didn't want her love to suffer any more than he already did. As much as her heart was telling her to cover every single opportunity they discussed and to leave nothing to chance, she knew that Mind was right. Not that Mind didn't complain about it any less internally. Anticipation, uncertainty, speculation; all of them paved the way to an anxious grip on their well-being.

"As you count sheep, remember that you are only a helpless little foal." Those were Mantra's last words before Mind found himself facing the white light down the celestial path once more. To his astonishment, the princess of the moon appeared again before the path. The vile silhouette wasn't anywhere to be seen as of yet.

"I'm surprised you came back."

"Like I said before; it’s my duty to help ponies in need."

"No, you can't beat it, and I can’t guarantee it won’t try to kill you again, so get out of here."

"Who do you think you are telling me what to do?"

"I'm sure your sister has a good answer to that question." Luna remained unaffected by his rude demeanor toward her, seeing through to his true noble intent.

"Well, you no longer have mind control. My hooves are firmly planted right here. But you’re right; I can't defeat that thing. You must be the one to defeat it. The only reason I tried to banish it before was because I sensed something not natural about it."

“Not natural?”

“There’s guilt, Mind. There are also fights we have with ourselves. And there are also wars.”

"I've been fighting this thing for a while. It's not like it’s lying either. Everything it said last night was true: I felt so much pain when I had my powers that I wanted to make Celestia and Twilight and her friends suffer for defying me. I felt that they wronged me and I was reveling too much in my power to see that I was the one in the wrong. It consumed me- No, I let it consume me and my common sense."

"And you look back on it in complete disbelief. Believe me, being consumed like that changes a pony." Luna gave a huff. "I spent one thousand years in the moon, and all I could think about was the day I would come back to Equestria and make my sister pay for it. For a thousand years, that is all I would ever think about~ When I came to my senses, everypony forgave me easily, but I didn't forgive myself, and I created the Tantabus to punish myself. And it's quite obvious you don’t forgive yourself either."

"Well, maybe I deserve to be punished."

"My sister pardoned you.” Luna’s voice grew firmer and raised slightly in volume as she continued. “For your information, she doesn't have limitless patience. She pardoned you because she knows that you’re a good pony. Your inner demon does not define who you are. Mind Fission, you are strong and kind, which is why you have ponies who want you to get through this. For Snowy, for Mantra, for everypony who showed up to your forgiveness meeting. Forgive yourself and pull through for them." The princess then faded away, leaving Mind alone to contemplate his next decision.

Hooves began to trek down the path with a newfound determination. The silhouette appeared before Mind once more, towering first, then shrunk down to equal size.

"That'd be such a moving speech if she weren't still kicking herself for her Nightmare Moon bullshit." The silhouette said, its demonic filter still prevalent, but, like its newfound presence, not as intimidating.

"Please, she isn't still hung up about that.” Mind said as he walked past the silhouette. “She only brought it up to show empathy."

"Oh come on, you're just lying to yourself now.” The silhouette suddenly reappeared before him, then started to walk beside him. “She could've easily banished the Tantabus, but she withdrew it; it still lives inside of her. Deep down, she isn't rid of it, just like how you won't be rid of me." Mind stopped in his tracks.

"How about you level with me? Why do you haunt me?"

"Haunt you? I don't haunt you, you just refuse to accept the truth."

"I accepted that I did terrible things," Mind said with a flare of his nostril and furling of his brows, "but I don't accept that you're a part of me."

"Oh, but I am. You even told Luna yourself that you wanted to make Celestia and Twilight’s friends pay for what they did to you. You remember what they did; everything they did to you."

"No, you're responsible for them reacting the way they did."

"Me? Me!? You can keep blaming me for it all, you can keep saying how I did so and so, but make no mistake, you and I are not two separate entities. I am you, and you are me."

"No!” Mind said, rearing, then stamping his front hooves into the path. “I'm nothing like you! You are the antithesis of everything I believe in! I never have been and will never ever be you!"

"You already have been. While the mind is the center of intellect, method, analysis, etcetera, it also houses irrationalities: Fetishes, phobias, and worst of all; schisms. You will never be rid of this schism because a schism is what you are."

Author's Note

Psychology played a really big part into this story, and not so much with the typical ABDL mind traps (self-acceptance and whatnot). While alluded to before, this chapter (and the next) goes deep into the long road of forgiving oneself and how annoying it can be when one thinks themselves into a hole of guilt.