Want That Butt, Need That Butt

Chapters

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4

Chapter 1

“Is there anything I should know about this? Like, uh…” Jake squinted, trying to remember the training he’d received. “...special instructions?”

“Just don’t break the vial,” said Twilight Sparkle. “That was probably obvious, huh? Thank you so much for doing this, I’ve got a million things to keep an eye on here in the castle, and Spike’s not here at the moment…”

“No thanks necessary,” said Jake, tucking the vial into his back pocket. “It’s my job, remember?”

“And it looks like it’s a good fit for you!” said Twilight. “I bet you’ve gotten to know the town pretty well by now, and met all sorts of ponies!”

“Yeah,” said Jake. “I mean, it’s still a bit of an adjustment, not being around other humans.”

“Oh, I’m sure it is,” said Twilight sympathetically. “But I think you’ll find that ponies are pretty easy to make friends with!”

“Well, yeah,” said Jake. “But I don’t just mean for friendship, I mean like…”

As Jake trailed off, recognition dawned on Twilight’s face and she gave him a knowing smile. “Hey, there’s plenty of eligible mares here in Ponyville,” she said, nudging him with her foreleg. “You know, I’m free later today. Once you get off work, why don’t you courier me some takeout and we’ll talk about how you’re doing?”

“Sounds good,” said Jake. “And the vial… the professor’s train is coming through at 1:15?”

“Yup!” said Twilight. “She’s just passing through, so make sure you get it in her hooves while her train’s at the station.”

“Will do!” said Jake. With a wave, he set off into Ponyville, leaving Twilight to her work. When he met her later today, he’d have to ask her just what he was transporting; it couldn’t have been too dangerous, if Twilight’s only instruction was “don’t break the vial.” From what Jake knew of magic - and Twilight’s work with it - the fluid in the vial could be something incredible and world-changing, or maybe just a dry and technical variation on some rather mundane spell. Probably closer to the latter than the former, if she was entrusting it to a courier.

Jake’s pace slowed as he passed by a sandwich shop. A quick glance at the clock in the window told him that he had plenty of time to kill before making his delivery; it wasn’t yet noon, he was close to the train station, and he had nothing to do until he had to hand off the vial. This was as good a place as any to settle the rumble in his stomach, so he took a seat at one of the outdoor tables and opened a menu.

But sitting down was a mistake - or rather, putting the vial in his back pocket had been a mistake. The glass snapped beneath his weight as he lowered himself into the seat, and the vial was so thin that he neither heard nor felt it happen. And the liquid inside was just close enough to his body temperature that he didn’t feel it seep through his pants, settle on his skin, and quickly evaporate.

So Jake had nothing but sandwiches on his mind as he sat at the table and soaked in the sunshine. He ordered his usual from the waitress - whose eyes seemed to linger on him after she took his order - and enjoyed his meal, just like on any other day.

The only thing that seemed even a little unusual was the attentiveness of his waitress. He didn’t really mind - she was nice, and very pretty - but she seemed very interested in how his meal was going and whether she could do anything to make it better. Even for Ponyville, this was more niceness than Jake was accustomed to.

But it certainly wasn’t unusual enough to distract him from his job. With time to spare, he finished his meal, laid out some bits on the table, and stood up from his chair…

And he’d barely been standing up for two seconds when a pony’s snout bumped into his ass, hitting him with nearly enough force to knock him over. Stumbling forward, he turned around to see who’d hit him.

“Oh, I’m so sorry!” said a mare that Jake recognized as Bon Bon - cream-colored coat, pink and blue mane, pieces of candy for a cutie mark. She was nice enough, based on the handful of interactions Jake had had with her, and she seemed genuinely apologetic for bumping directly into Jake’s ass. “Are you okay?” she asked, circling him to get a look at the point of impact.

“Yeah, I’m fine,” said Jake. “Humans aren’t that fragile.” Bon Bon was behind him now, scoping out the back of his pants, so he turned around - but Bon Bon just kept circling him, keeping her eyes on his butt. “Really, it’s fine.”

“Are you sure?” asked Bon Bon. “It doesn’t feel like it’s bruised, does it? I could check for you…” rising up on her back hooves, she tugged at the waistband of his pants, pulling downward - but his belt fortunately kept her from actually pulling them past his butt.

“Woah!” he yelped, jerking his body away from her. “I thought Twilight explained to everybody that I’m kind of… particular about being fully clothed.” He turned around, and Bon Bon, for once, didn’t attempt to get behind him. “Besides, even ponies don’t go around yanking each others’ clothes off, do they?”

Bon Bon seemed to be ashamed of her behavior… but there was something else in her body language too. She was trembling, almost vibrating, as if she was struggling to keep something contained. “Sorry, I’m sorry,” she said. “It’s just… I’ve been in sort of a strange mood lately, and, well… could I talk a little more… privately… with you?”

Jake raised a skeptical eyebrow at the request. Bon Bon and he weren’t close friends, so he couldn’t imagine what she wanted to open up to him about. But it didn’t feel right to refuse, either - Ponyville had been good to him, and he wanted to return its kindness. If that meant hearing out Bon Bon’s personal troubles, that wasn’t too high a price to pay. As long as it didn’t make him late to his delivery, anyway.

Bon Bon led Jake around to the back of the restaurant. It wasn’t exactly a secluded spot - Ponyville’s buildings weren’t packed tightly enough to create any dark alleyways - but it was hidden from most sets of prying eyes. “Okay,” he said, “so what’s-”

Bon Bon suddenly leapt at him, knocking him into the back wall of the restaurant- and then with surprising speed and nimbleness, she flipped him around. His face was mashed against the wall, and his ass was jutting out - and Bon Bon was all over his ass, nuzzling her face against the back of his pants. “Bon Bon!” Jake grunted, struggling against the weight of the mare’s body, “What are you doing?”

“I just have to… feel your butt,” moaned Bon Bon. “With my face and my hooves… I need to feel your cheeks without these pants in the way…” she tugged at his jeans again.

“What the hell?” said Jake, trying to throw Bon Bon off without excessive force. “I thought Lyra was the one who was all weird about me!”

“No…” mumbled Bon Bon, running her snout up and down along the crack of Jake’s ass. “She can’t have you, you’re mine, you and your beautiful butt… Take off those stupid pants so I can see all of you, Jake, I want to kiss your bare asscheeks and stick my face in your crack and lick your gorgeous human asshole…”

OK, that was too much. Jake suddenly cared a lot more about getting away from Bon Bon than he did about hurting her feelings. He pushed off the wall, knocking Bon Bon onto her butt, and ran off in the direction of the train station. He still had a job to do, after all; whatever was wrong with Bon Bon, he could deal with it later.

But Bon Bon wasn’t so easily dissuaded. She was chasing him down, wide-eyed, drooling, and shouting after him. “Nooo, come back!” she wailed, easily loud enough for everyone in the vicinity to hear. “I wanna lick your sweet human butthole, Jake!”

And as one might imagine, that attracted the attention of a lot of ponies. Jake, still determined to do his job, had made it to the train platform just as the passengers were disembarking. And so there were a few dozen ponies, mostly mares, turning to look at the pony who wanted to lick a human butthole and the human whose butthole she wanted to lick.

Jake felt his face getting hot. This was humiliating for him, and it was probably even worse for Bon Bon, but as long as he was here he figured he may as well do his job. He looked for the professor he’d been told to make the delivery to, reminding himself of the physical description Twilight had given him. Unicorn, red-orange coat, long yellow mane, cutie mark of a red jewel set in gold. She was easy enough to spot, and Jake rushed over to her, hoping to hand off the vial before Bon Bon made too much of a scene.

“You must be the courier,” said the unicorn. “I’m professor Crimson Shine, and… er, it’s none of my business, but are those mares giving you trouble?”

“Mares? Plural?” asked Jake. He turned around to look at Bon Bon… and saw her, and five other mares, struggling and grappling with one another. They all seemed like they were trying to get closer to Jake, but as soon as one of them made the slightest bit of forward progress, the others pulled them back. And on top of that, all of them were shouting at each other about Jake’s ass, claiming it for their own.

“I have to be honest,” said Jake, turning around to look at Crimson Shine. “I don’t really know what’s going-”

Something about Crimson Shine’s expression made Jake pause. She was staring at Jake with a hungry expression, leaning sideways to look at his backside… and then, without a word, she sparked a flare of orange-hued magic on her horn and magically unzipped his pants.

“What are you doing?” yelped Jake. He grabbed his pants by the waist and held them up, struggling against the unicorn magic that was pulling them down.

“I’m just trying to get a better look at your rump,” said Crimson Shine. “If you let me kiss your bottom and lick your tight little butthole, I’ll give you a very generous tip…”

She managed to get Jake’s pants to the floor, and he jumped out of them, stumbling backward. That got him away from Crimson Shine, but it delivered him right to the mob of mares And that mob had grown: it was now twelve mares, all fighting for the right to kiss Jake’s butthole. And now that Jake himself had fallen right onto their angry pile, that dispute suddenly got a lot more heated. Mares were tugging at his boxer shorts from every direction, with hooves, with magic, or with the tips of their wings.

As he struggled his way through the mob, one mare or another would occasionally get her face right in his butt, nuzzling her way between his cheeks, pressing her snout up against his puckered asshole. Jake was confused and frightened, but he couldn’t help but be stimulated by what was happening to him; he felt his cock growing stiffer as the mares gave his butt more and more attention.

Fortunately for Jake’s modesty, the mares’ complete lack of cooperation made it impossible for any of them to get what they were after. As soon as one mare managed to nuzzle his butt, she was yanked away by two or three jealous mares. They couldn’t even succeed in getting his boxers off - and, ultimately, they couldn’t succeed in holding him down. When the mares that were grabbing his legs were shoved aside, Jake was able to make a break for it, running pantsless in the direction of Twilight’s castle.

Twilight would know what to do. This seemed like a magical problem, and no one was better qualified than her to deal with those. Jake just needed to make it to the castle without getting mobbed… and it looked like he just might manage it. Plenty of ponies in the raging mob were faster than Jake, but they were still fighting viciously amongst themselves, and any mare who got close to him, on land or on air, was promptly tackled by several others. His heart was pounding and his lungs were burning by the time he got to the castle, but he beat the mob to the door. He raised his fist to hammer on the door-

And found himself swinging his fist into empty air, suddenly surrounded by crystal walls. “Hi, Jake,” said the voice of Twilight Sparkle. “Sorry for the surprise teleport, but my proximity spell sensed you at the door and I just hate it when people knock while I’m trying to work.”

“Uh, it’s fine, actually,” said Jake. “Are we in your bedroom?”

“Yeah, I’m just doing some spellwork,” said Twilight. She was seated at her desk, hunched over a stack of papers, not looking up as she scribbled with a pencil held in her magic aura. “You’re much too early for that bringing-takeout-dinner thing I proposed… was there a problem with the delivery?”

“Uh, yeah,” said Jake. “I ran into Bon Bon, and she was acting weird… chasing me… and then a bunch of other mares were chasing me. They weren’t angry, they were just kind of, uh…”

Twilight raised her head from her work. “Were they acting like they… wanted something from you? Something you had?”

“Yeah, kinda... “ said Jake, not entirely comfortable with the prospect of explaining how a mob of mares had been clamoring to lick his butthole. “They stripped off my pants… and…”

“Okay, I see what happened!” said Twilight. She scooted her chair out from her desk and hopped down. “It sounds to me that you broke the vial I gave you, it spilled on your clothes, and a bunch of ponies went crazy over your pants.” She looked at his bare legs, her eyes widening slightly as she saw his cock tenting his boxers.

“Uh… anyway,” she continued, “That vial contained a liquid suspension of what’s known as the “Want It, Need It” spell, which causes ponies to develop an uncontrollable desire for whatever it affects. I was sending it off for study… unfortunately that plan suffered a setback, but the important thing is that you’re all right.” She trotted past him and used her magic to open one of her dresser drawers. “Now let’s get you something else to wear. I know you don’t like just being in your underwear. How about-”

Twilight turned around, and at that moment she finally saw what the other mares had been seeing: Jake’s butt. Instantly, desire rose in her mind, turning into a singular lustful obsession. That butt had to be hers. She needed to kiss those soft human asscheeks and rim that perfect human butthole.

“Or maybe…” said Twilight, “We should strip off those undies so I can get a better look at you.”

“Huh?” said Jake - but before he could react, he felt his boxers getting pulled to the floor. And when Twilight saw his bare butt, her brain practically overheated with desire. She knew she was under the effects of her spell - she recognized the signs - but she didn't care. She didn't want to try and fight it. She just wanted to bury her face in Jake’s asscrack and lick his wonderful human butthole.

Twilight tackled Jake. His knees hit the soft carpet, and then he fell dick-first, lying flat against the floor. “Twilight, what are you doing?” he asked, planting his palms on the floor to lift himself back up.

“I can’t help it,” gasped Twilight. Jake suddenly felt his wrists and ankles get heavy and slam against the floor; when he looked at his hands, he saw rings of purple magic holding his wrists down, exerting more force than his muscles could overcome.

“Jake,” breathed Twilight, nuzzling her soft furry cheek against Jake’s butt, “I’m under the effects of the potion that you spilled on yourself. It made your butt… irresistible…” Jake felt her lips, soft and warm, press themselves against his asscheek and give it a long, tender kiss.

“Okay, that explains… a lot…” said Jake. “Can’t you fight back? Or dispel it?”

“I could,” said Twilight, “But it would be… really hard… and not much fun…” She licked her way up Jake’s crack, making him shudder. “And it would be lots and lots of fun to just lick your beautiful butt until the spell wears off. What’s wrong, doesn’t it feel good?”

“Well, it does feel kind of good,” said Jake - whose cock was standing at full attention, rubbing against the soft carpet as the motions of Twilight’s head gently moved his body back and forth. “But… I don’t want you to be stuck doing something you don’t really want to do.”

“Believe me, Jake, there is nothing I would rather do right now than bury my face as deep in your ass as I can possibly get it,” said Twilight. “But if it makes you feel better, I did already have a crush on you.”

“What?” asked Jake - and then he jerked in surprise as Twilight blew a raspberry on his asscheek and lifted her head, giggling.

“Yeah!” said Twilight. “That’s why I wanted to get you alone tonight! You said you needed a woman in your life, and I thought I saw my opportunity… Without the potion, though, I might not have been this aggressive… or so focused on your perfect, beautiful ass…”

“Wow,” said Jake. “I really had no idea. I mean, I like you too, but this is a lot…”

“If you think that’s a lot,” said Twilight, “Then you’re not prepared for what I’m going to give you next. It’s been taking all my willpower to keep myself from doing this…” She set her hooves on his cheeks and pulled them apart, sighing with bliss as she finally set her eyes on his asshole - then she buried her face in his crack, dragging her tongue over his pucker.

“Woah, woah!” yelped Jake, doing his best to struggled against the magical shackles on his wrists and ankles. “Holy shit, Twilight, I kind of… didn’t think you’d really…”

But Twilight was done talking. Her first taste of Jake’s butthole had gotten her hopelessly addicted; before this moment, her mind and her magic could have resisted the spell, but now she was completely devoted, utterly in love with Jake’s ass. She moaned happily, circling his hole with her tongue, kneading his asscheeks with her hooves.

“Twilight,” groaned Jake, “If you keep doing that… I’m gonna cum…”

If Jake had been trying to dissuade Twilight, that was the wrong thing to say. She pressed her tongue harder against his skin, massaging the sensitive spot with her surprisingly strong mouth muscle. Jake had never realized just how sensitive his asshole was, or how much pleasure it could provide, but Twilight was greedily pleasuring his pucker. If anything, she was getting more out of this than Jake was; she had a desperate need to touch and taste his butt, and every lick just made her want it more.

Jake’s cock was throbbing, twitching, threatening to shoot its load every time Twilight licked his butthole. “Twilight… slow down… I can’t… nnghh-” his body jerked, and he came, shooting his load onto Twilight’s rug in thick, sticky ropes. Twilight didn’t let up for a second, licking his butthole all through his orgasm, mumbling with pleasure while Jake grunted helplessly and spilled his cum. He fell limp, panting, when his climax ended, but Twilight wouldn’t stop.

“Twilight,” gasped Jake, “You have to stop… I just came, I need a break…”

Twilight lifted her head from his asscrack, sighing with satisfaction. “I’m afraid the spell won’t wear off for a few more hours at least,” she said. “But I’d feel terrible if you weren’t enjoying this as much as I am. Hold on, let me try something…” Her horn glowed, and Jake felt her aura embrace his dick and balls. When the spell ended, he felt… different, in a way that he couldn’t quite place…

“There,” said Twilight. “Now you should be able to cum for hours.” She wedged her snout back into Jake’s asscrack, licking his ass with the same lustful energy as before. And Jake, no longer in his refractory period, felt his balls tightening and his cock twitching, readying to fire another load…

Jake felt the morning sun on his face and furry limbs wrapped around his chest. When he opened his eyes, he found himself surrounded by crystal walls, and when he looked behind him he saw a purple pony embracing himself with her forelimbs.

He realized that the events of the previous afternoon - and the previous night - hadn’t been a dream. He started to wriggle out of Twilight’s forelegs, trying not to wake her up; for all he knew, she’d hold him down and lick his ass for hours if he roused her.

Before he made much progress, though, Twilight mumbled and pulled him towards her, holding him in a tighter embrace. “Good morning,” she whispered, resting her head against the back of his neck.

“Uh, hey, Twilight,” said Jake. “Are you… feeling okay?”

“I’m feeling good,” said Twilight. “Maybe a little embarrassed about how I acted last night… but it’s nice to wake up next to a handsome human.”

“So… the potion wore off?” asked Jake.

“Yeah,” said Twilight. “Although the liquid form of the spell is sort of untested, so there might be some lingering effects… we’ll just have to see.”

“What sort of lingering effects?” asked Jake.

“Oh, probably nothing too weird,” said Twilight, releasing Jake from her embrace. “Here, I’ll let you start your day… once I give you your good-morning kiss…”

Jake felt two hooves parting his asscheeks, and Twilight’s snout digging its way into his crack - but instead of a full-on rimming, Twilight just planted a tender kiss on his butthole. “Good morning, Jakey,” she said, her whispering voice tickling his pucker.

Chapter 2

As the castle’s front doors swung closed behind him, Jake glanced around the front hall. “Twilight?” he called out, a little surprised that the princess wasn't there to meet him. She was usually quick to greet him when he answered her invitations; Jake had thought of that as just typical pony friendliness, but in light of yesterday's events… it might have been because she had a crush on him. Jake was still processing that information.

There was a sharp noise behind Jake, and he felt a soft face nuzzling his butt. He instinctively jerked his body forward, and then whipped his body around to see Twilight Sparkle looking at him with a seductive smile.

“How was work, handsome?” asked Twilight, fluttering her eyelashes.

“A little weird,” he said. “Mares were looking at my ass all day… pointing it out to each other when they thought I wasn't looking, whispering about it and smiling…” he bit his lip awkwardly. “I kept worrying they would try to tackle and strip me like yesterday, but they just… looked.”

Twilight giggled, and did a giddy little stomp with her front hooves. “I love it!” she said. “My stallion has the butt that all the mares can't stop staring at!”

“Your… stallion?” asked Jake.

“Uh, yeah!” said Twilight - and then she vanished, and reappeared behind Jake. She started nuzzling his butt again, and this time he didn't move away from her. “Last night I licked your asshole for hours and made you cum dozens of times! The way I see it, that makes you mine!” She giggled, rubbing her about against the back of his pants. “Why? Don't you want to be my stallion, Jakey? Don't you like getting butt kisses from your favorite purple princess?”

“Well… yeah…” said Jake. Last night had been pretty incredible; thanks to Twilight’s magic, he literally had come dozens of time from getting his ass licked. “I just didn't know you were that serious about it. I mean, you're a magic princess and I'm just…”

“Just a one-of-a-kind man from another dimension,” said Twilight. “That makes you the rarest catch in Equestria! And on top of that, you've got that transcendently beautiful butt. I just wanna stare at it all the time… and give your cute little puckered butthole a hundred kisses every day…”

“Uh, wow,” said Jake. “Okay, I'll be your stallion. But… you're okay with other mares checking out my ass?”

“Well, they can't help it,” said Twilight. “Not as long as the lingering effects of that ‘Want It, Need It’ spell are still on your butt. Besides, I'm not a jealous mare, Jakey. You can show off your beautiful butt to as many mates as you want. If you feel like it, you can even let ‘em lick your asshole… as long as you come back here and tell me all about it!”

“Do you really think it'll be a long-term thing?” asked Jake. “Aren't the lingering effects going to wear off eventually?”

Twilight suddenly paused her nuzzling. “Well, now that you mention it… I'm not sure. I sure hope it is; I don't want to stop loving your butt, Jakey. Last night was the most fun I've ever had, and I always want to have your beautiful, kissable, lickable butt in my life. If it's not permanent, Jakey, I'll make it permanent.”

Jake was starting to get a little weirded out… but he was flattered by Twilight’s praise, and her enthusiasm was infectious. “Well, as long as mares are just looking at me, and not stampeding at me… I guess I could live with this.”

“Great!” said Twilight. “First things first… We need an experiment, Jakey, so we can figure out exactly how the effects work! Ooh, this’ll be fun… give me a little while to get things set up - when I come get you, Jakey, it'll be time to learn everything there is to know about your enchanted butt!”

“I've never seen this room before,” said Jake, regarding the pale blue, sterile-looking walls of the small rectangular room. “How far down are we? How far down does the castle go?”

“Pretty far down! The castle is sort of a magic tree,” said Twilight, “and the basement’s sort of a root system. I built my magic lab down here, out of the way of the castle-y stuff.”

“Huh, okay,” said Jake. “And what are we doing down here? What kind of test were you setting up for the past hour?”

“Just a modest scientific inquiry into what makes my boyfriend’s butt so sexy,” said Twilight. “I just needed to write up the test plan and call over a test subject.”

“Aren't I the test subject?”

“Yes and no,” said Twilight. “Here, just sit in this chair and wait while I get in the observation room.”

Twilight teleported a plain-looking, human-sized wooden chair into the room - then she vanished and reappeared on the other side of a window that occupied one long end of the rectangular room.

“Okay, I have equipment over here that suppresses and enhances magical fields,” said Twilight. When she spoke, her voice was projected into the room Jake was in; whether she was using magic or a microphone, Jake couldn't guess. “The ‘Want It, Need It’ spell on your butt has lost some of the potency it possessed yesterday, so I’m going to be testing it at its current power, then gradually raising its strength. Okay?”

“Uh, I guess?” said Jake. He wasn't sure that this test was necessary, but he trusted Twilight not to put him in any danger - and she was certainly excited about this. “So who's the ‘test subject’ you called over?”

Twilight, on the other side of the window, activated either a spell or a mechanism - and a door on the far side of the room opened up. “Hey Jake!” said a familiar voice, as a familiar pony trotted out of the adjacent room.

“Oh hey, Derpy!” said Jake, pivoting in his seat to face the gray pegasus. “I wasn't expecting, uh… well, anyway, hi!”

Derpy was something of a colleague to Jake; although she worked for the official Ponyville mail service and he worked for an independent courier service, they interacted pretty frequently. Jake found Derpy easy to talk to, and the two of them had spent the occasional lunch break together…

And Twilight knew about that, because Jake had told her. Could that have something to do with her decision to make Derpy her test subject?

“So what am I doing here?” asked Derpy. “Twilight just said it was important… and it'd be some kind of magic test?” She shrugged, and her wonky eye drifted to the side.

“It's nothing too taxing,” said Twilight, from behind the observation window. “Jake, could you stand up and turn around?” Lowering her voice, she mumbled to herself: “Spell power currently at approximately twenty-five percent…”

Jake braced himself, anticipating the reaction he'd get from Derpy. The mailmare, as it happened, was not one of the mares who'd chased him yesterday, nor had she seen his ass while he was out and about today. This would be her first exposure to the lingering “Want It, Need It” effect on his butt.

Jake stood and turned in a circle - and when he returned to his original orientation, he didn't see the same lustful smile he'd seen on the faces of the mares who'd seen his butt today. The “spell suppression” must have been doing its job…

But Derpy was affected, or so it seemed. A hot red flush began to develop on her gray cheeks, and she suddenly seemed to be finding it more difficult that usual to meet his eyes. She lowered her face, and when Jake tried to look her in the eyes, she lifted one wing to shield her face shyly.

“You all right?” asked Jake, bending his knees to bring himself down to her level.

“Yeah, J-Jake, I'm okay,” said Derpy, her voice wavering a bit. “It's just… the way you're looking at me, it's… you're making me blush, Jake…”

Jake was certain that he wasn't looking at Derpy any differently from usual. What had changed, he suspected, was that Derpy was perceiving him differently. Even at one-quarter strength, the spell was making Derpy think about Jake in a more romantic light. A more sexually confident mare might have started to flirt with him, but Derpy was naturally shy about such matters - and so she was hiding her face.

“Lowering suppression, spell power at fifty percent…” mumbled Twilight.

Derpy’s demeanor changed slightly: she peeked out from behind her wing, taking another look at Jake’s butt. “H-hey, Jake,” she said, standing a little taller, “you should come by the post office on your lunch break tomorrow. It's, uh, been a while, right? We can grab sandwiches, and you can, uh…” she took a heavy breath. “…you can sit on my desk. Just…” she took another heavy breath, and her wings started to rise. “Just sit your butt right on my desk, right where I do my work…”

Jake laughed nervously. There was that now-familiar effect: the ass obsession that mares who saw his butt all developed “yeah, we could grab lunch…” he said.

“Spell power seventy five percent…” mumbled Twilight

“Actually,” said Derpy, “lunchtime might be busy for me tomorrow. How about dinner? I'm a good cook, Jake, you can come over and I'll cook you a nice dinner, and I can show you my bedroom…”

Derpy’s wonky eye spun, as if in a panic, and she fluttered her wings slightly. “My house!” said Derpy. “I mean I can show you my house, you can see all the rooms if you want! The bedroom, the bathroom… you'd like my bathtub, Jake, you could fit a human in my bathtub and still have room leftover for a pony to get in with him!” Her blush deepened as she realized what she'd said. “I mean, I mean…” she stammered, her knees quivering.

“Dinner sounds nice!” said Jake, “but I might have to check with, uh… my schedule… to see if I can.” Derpy seemed to calm down slightly, but she was still shaking - and Jake, more or less on instinct, put his hand on the crown of her head, running his fingers through her golden hair and scratching gently behind her ears.

“Mmmhhh,” moaned Derpy, leaning her head into Jake’s hand. “Jake, that feels good… I want to repay the favor, Jake, I know a way to touch you that you'll really like…”

Derpy ducked her head and scampered around Jake, until she was facing his butt - and then she buried her face in his ass, nuzzling his cheeks and sighing happily. “Does this feel good, Jakey?” she asked. “These cheeks are so soft, I bet it feels nice when I touch them…”

“Spell power at normal strength,” muttered Twilight.

“Jakey, I've always wondered…” said Derpy, rearing back and putting her forehooves on his cheeks, “why do you wear clothes all the time? It must get hot and uncomfortable, covering yourself up like that.” She bent her wings forward, digging them into the waistline of his pants. “You should be more like us ponies are, and not cover yourself up… I bet some ponies want to see all of you, Jakey…”

Jake tried to lunge forward, away from the mare who was trying to forcibly pull down his pants. But he couldn't move his body forward - when he tried, his body bounced lightly off a purple shimmer in the air.

“Your butt is such a handsome shape,” said Derpy, “I just want to see it. I just want to touch it with my face, and dig my nose between your cheeks, and kiss your butthole a million times…” with a forceful tug, she brought Jake's pants down to the floor, and she stumbled back. Her eyes spinning, she stared at the back of Jake's boxer shorts, drool glistening on her lips.

Twilight Sparkle’s voice echoed through the small room. “Derpy,” she said, “can you describe what you're feeling right now?”

“I, uh, I need to see Jake’s butt,” said Derpy, sounding almost hypnotized. “It's beautiful. I'm in love with it, I need to be closer to it, I have to kiss it and lick it or I'll explode…” she closed her teeth on the fabric of Jake’s boxers and tugged, tearing them by the seams. As soon as she saw Jake’s bare ass, her legs began to tremble and fluid dropped from her glistening pussy. “Ohhh Jake,” she sighed.

“Do you want to worship Jake’s asshole, Derpy?” asked Twilight. “Do you want to bury your face in his asscheeks and never come out?”

“Yes, I want his butt so much, I have to have it...” said Derpy. She plunged her face into his asscrack, nuzzling his cheeks as she dug herself deeper.

“Well, here's the thing,” said Twilight. “Jake’s butt already belongs to me. Last night I kissed his perfect butt and licked his asshole and made him cum dozens of times. I ate his ass all night long, and that makes him mine. You're a kind and honest mare, Derpy… you wouldn't try and steal a princess’ boyfriend, would you?”

Derpy paused and stepped back, shaking her head in confusion. “Uh… I didn't know…” she said, although her eyes were still glued to Jake’s ass. “I don't want to come between you, I don't… want to hurt anyone…”

“Spell power at two hundred percent,” said Twilight.

Derpy lunged at Jake’s butt, knocking him to the floor. “I don't care,” she groaned, licking passionately at Jake’s asscheeks. “It's too good, I have to have Jakey’s ass, it has to be mine…” she dug her face between Jake’s cheeks again, and this time her warm, wet tongue dragged across his puckered asshole. Jake shuddered in surprise and pleasure, his stiff cock jumping.

“Yes, yes, this is very good data,” said Twilight. Jake thought he could hear another sound coming through from the control room, though - a schlick, schlick sound like a mare’s hood stroking her own pussy. “At two hundred percent, subject’s moral inhibitions were overridden… she proceeded to… mmm… tackle Jakey and lick his tight little butthole, pleasuring his ass with her soft tongue… even after being told that Jakey was mine, she couldn't stop herself from tonguing his perfect, tasty little asshole, right in front of me… oooh… while I'm watching…”

It became pretty clear to Jake that Twilight’s reasons for running this test weren't purely scientific. She’d set up a test where another mare would be exposed to the “Want It, Need It” spell on his butt, then increased the power of the spell until it would be impossible for Derpy to resist. And now she was touching herself, narrating the scene as another mare had her way with her boyfriend. Jake had assumed that Twilight wanted an exclusive relationship with him, the way most human women would… but Twilight Sparkle wanted to watch other mares with their snouts deep in Jake’s buttcrack, licking his asshole, helpless against their desire.

“Need more data,” panted Twilight, between heavy breaths and wet schlicking sounds. “When does the spell overpower a mare's inhibitions? When does desire become stronger than moral considerations? Might… vary from pony to pony… need to set up tests with… Pinkie… Applejack… Rainbow Dash, maybe… Celestia and Luna… see if alicorns are affected differently…”

Jake was increasingly overwhelmed by the passionate rimming that Derpy was giving him… but he could still hear Twilight talking to herself, stimulating her arousal with fantasies. A revolving cast of beautiful mares, driven mad with desire at the sight of Jake’s butt,

“Mmmph… more data… deeper investigation,” breathed Twilight. “Three hundred percent…”

Jake felt Derpy’s mouth pushing out a low, muffled moan that grew into a full-throated cry. Her hooves, planted on his buttcheeks to pin his body down, began to shake. Her whole body was quaking as she cried out nonstop, her tongue pressing harder into Jake’s asshole as she came.

“Ooh, ooh, excellent data,” groaned Twilight. “So good, the data’s so fuckin’ good…” she was panting, her head bobbing beyond the control room’s window, still working her good up and down her sipping pussy lips. “Spontaneous orgasm at… three hundred percent… very important to test this with additional mares… make sure Jakey’s butt gets lots and lots of love…”

Jake was getting close to climax himself; his cock was throbbing, leaking pre onto the floor of the testing room. Derpy’s orgasm wasn't stopping her from rimming him, either - she was still deep inside his asscrack, tonguing his pucker with absolute dedication. Jake felt Derpy's hooves shaking less, growing steadier as her orgasm came to an end… but not four seconds later, her body began to quiver again, and her moans grew in volume as her body was hit with another climax, pounding her in waves. But her tongue never left Jake’s asshole; she needed his butt, she had a thirst for his asshole that no amount of lapping could ever satisfy.

And Jake, relentlessly pleasured by Derpy’s tongue, finally came. His cock erupted forcefully, splattering the floor beneath him, firing off rapid spurts of cum while he wriggled helplessly underneath Derpy. And Derpy - of course - didn’t relent; her tongue was still circling, pressing at his pucker.

“Ah, Jakey just came,” said Twilight. “I’ll need to enchant his cock again, so he can keep cumming as long as Derpy eats out his asshole. I have to make sure my Jakey is able to have fun… or else what kind of girlfriend would I be?” There was a tingling warmth around Jake’s cock, and he felt himself getting hard again. The post-orgasmic feeling faded, and Jake felt ready to cum all over again.

“And as for Derpy, our subject,” said Twilight, “Three hundred percent spell power gives her multiple… perhaps continuous… spontaneous climaxes. The enchantment has taken on fascinating new behavior in its liquid form. Not only has it attached itself permanently to Jakey’s butt, it has adapted itself to create irresistible sexual attraction. And with increased power, it… creates overwhelming pleasure… stimulating the mare’s pussy to climax…” She panted heavily, close to orgasm, stroking herself furiously. “Should I push the spell’s power higher? Four hundred percent could be… illuminating…” For a moment, she seemed to consider the question as she touched herself. “No,” she finally concluded, “not ethical to take it further, but very tempting…”

Jake felt his cock throbbing again, building up to another climax. “Jakey,” gasped Twilight, “I’m monitoring your body, and I can see you’re about to cum again. Do you want me to cum with you? Should we cum together? Mmm, how romantic…”

Jake couldn’t respond with more than a grunt - but Twilight wasn’t really waiting for him to respond. She stroked herself harder, sinking the side of her hoof deep into the wet folds of her marehood, determined to finish herself off.

And Derpy beat them both to the finish line, shaking and groaning with her third climax. Jake could only imagine what Derpy was going through; the magic - at three times the strength it had yesterday - had overpowered her mind, turning her into a ravenous, ass-eating sexual beast. How much worse would yesterday’s chaos have been, if the spell had been this powerful? Bon Bon would have torn Jake’s pants off and rimmed him right where she found him, climaxing endlessly as she pleasured his pucker. And when other mares came along… a riot would surely have engulfed Ponyville. A mob of mares, driven mad by lust, salivating at the thought of Jake’s butt, fighting for the right to own it…

Jake told himself that he didn’t want this, that it was strange to be the object of so many mares’ desires. But he couldn’t deny that the thought of it was exciting - all these mares lusting for his ass, climbing over each other for a chance to worship it. Even when the spell’s power was diminished, Jake could effortlessly seduce any mare he wanted, and she would kiss his asscheeks and rim his pucker until he shot his load…

Jake’s fantasies drove him over the edge again - and Twilight, who had been watching him closely, brought herself to climax at the same moment. She cried out, and her sound-projection magic filled the testing room with her voice. “Jakey,” she gasped, “I’m coming! We’re coming together! Ahh… it must feel so good, Jakey… Derpy’s licking your butthole while your long hard cock is shooting a big load of cum…” She staggered back, falling on her rump as her cunt throbbed in climax. “Don’t forget you’re mine, Jakey,” she groaned. “Some other mare is licking your butthole, but you’re still mine… no matter how many other mares I give you to, Jakey, you belong to Twilight Sparkle…”

Twilight’s groans faded into a sigh, and she slumped to the floor. Jake, too, was done with his orgasm, having shot his second load onto the floor beside his first. But Derpy was tireless - utterly consumed by lust, she rimmed Jake’s butthole with undiminished vigor and brought herself to a fourth climax.

“Oh my,” sighed Twilight, standing herself back up. “I’ve put Derpy through a lot, haven’t I? I guess she’s earned a break, since she’s given us a lot of good data… I’m sure she’s having the time of her life back there, but I should probably dial the spell power back to where it was before…”

Twilight’s magic shoved Derpy away from Jake’s butt - and when Jake turned to look at her, her glazed-over eyes gradually brightened. “Oh, wow,” Derpy murmured, “that was like really intense, Jake… sorry if it was too much, I just had to get in that butt…” She slowly bent her knees and settled on the ground - not sleeping, but resting her exhausted body. Now that the “Want It, Need It” spell wasn’t making her senselessly lustful, she didn’t have the energy to remain standing - much less to continue eating out Jake’s ass.

The door to the testing room opened, and Twilight stepped inside, looking just a little bit sheepish. “I may have taken things a little farther than I should have,” she said, “But it’s just so easy to let myself get carried away.” She trotted over to Jake - who was still face-down on the floor - and gave one buttcheek a quick kiss. “If you’ll let me, I think I know a way to make it up to you…”

Chapter 3

“All right,” muttered Queen Chrysalis, cautiously regarding the long, cylindrical cocoon she’d brought into her cavernous private chambers. “Just what are you?”

The cocoon, of course, wasn’t answering any questions. If Chrysalis wanted to learn anything, she’d have to open up that cocoon - but she was trepidatious. Not frightened, of course; the changeling queen feared nothing. But this creature she’d captured was a powerful unknown quantity. Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship, had put a lot of work into looking after this creature, safeguarding him and ensuring his comfort. He was one of a kind, an entity never documented in Equestrian history… what kind of power was he hiding, to be so important to Princess Twilight?

She used her magic to draw a lengthwise incision over the top of the cocoon, and with a brief green flash she split it open. Inside was the creature - the “human” - lying in a sort of stasis. Whatever he was, it seemed that his biology was similar enough to the known species of Equestria; the cocoon had worked like it was supposed to, keeping him perfectly safe and fast asleep. Now that the cocoon was open, he should wake up soon enough…

“Mmmh…” mumbled Jake, sitting up groggily and looking at his surroundings. “Twilight? Is this some kind of… sub- sub-basement? It’s too early for experiments, at least let me have some breakfast…”

“Experiments?” asked Chrysalis, raising an eyebrow. “Why don’t you tell me all about them, human? Once I know what she did to you, I can decide where my experiments will start!”

Jake finally noticed Chrysalis - first her sharp, toothy grin, then shining chitin and insectoid wings. “Oh, geez, you're…” he peered more closely at her legs. “Are you okay? You've got holes in you!”

“I'm fine,” scowled Chrysalis. “I am Chrysalis, queen of the changelings, and these ‘holes’ are natural and attractively-proportioned features of my anatomy. And you'd do well to keep your holes shut unless I ask you a question, human.”

Jake, shaking off the chemical stupor the cocoon had put him in, finally began to acknowledge the danger he was in. “Okay, look,” he said, “I don't know why you, uh, kidnapped me… but I'm really nobody special, okay?”

“I'm disappointed that you would lie to me, human,” sighed Chrysalis. “My spies report that you have been Twilight Sparkle’s singular obsession for quite some time. The Princess of Friendship concerns herself with tomes of ancient knowledge and artifacts of world-shattering power; she would not waste her time on you unless there was something worth paying attention to.”

Jake almost corrected Chrysalis’ misconception, but thought better of it. The truth was that he and Twilight Sparkle were in something of a relationship. The tone of their relationship was a bit odd, though; it had the lively days and cozy nights Jake was used to, but nearly every encounter ended with Twilight’s snout buried between his asscheeks, her tongue lapping insatiably at his butthole. Their bond wasn't based entirely on the “want it, need it” enchantment on his ass, but the mind-altering magic was certainly the central pillar of their physical intimacy.

But Chrysalis didn't seem like she would believe that if Jake told her. She was some kind of villain, Jake gathered; she'd observed that Twilight was obsessed with him, and assumed that he was a rare and powerful creature she was studying. If he explained that Twilight spent her evenings rimming his asshole, drunk on desire… Chrysalis didn't seem like she would simply accept that.

“I have a way of dealing with liars,” said Chrysalis, licking her lips eagerly. “Don't be afraid, human; just relax, do not fight me, and you may find that you enjoy this.” Her horn glowed a fiery, menacing green. “In just a moment you will be my devoted servant, and it will be your great pleasure to device my every whim…”

Jake cringed. He'd never had magic used offensively against him, and he didn't have the slightest idea how to defend himself against it. He didn't know if it was even possible for him to defend himself. He readied himself to resist the changeling queen’s magic…

But all he felt was a gentle fizzing in his head, as if his brain had been submerged in carbonated water. Chrysalis must have felt it too, because she jerked her head back in confusion and looked accusingly at Jake.

“So that's the first of your secrets, is it?” she said. “Some kind of mind-altering enchantment is already present on you, its strength rivaling my own. I could overpower it,” she boasted, “but I would much rather understand it… harness it, perhaps…”

Jake mused on just what it would mean for a villain to “harness” the “want it, need it” enchantment on his butt. Would she point Jake’s bare bottom at Twilight and her friends, reducing them to a slavering mob of ass-worshipping mares? The thought of it made him release an involuntary, scoffing laugh.

“Are you amused?” spat Chrysalis, stomping forward and getting up in his face. In spite of her anger, she was really quite pretty, Jake realized; her glaring eyes and snarling mouth hid a pleasant set of equine features, and there was a surprisingly enticing fragrance drifting from her mane - a bit of floral citrus, difficult to place.

“We will see if you laugh so easily when I have laid your intimate secrets bare, human,” said Chrysalis, her horn once again shining green. This time, her magic did what she wanted it to - it lifted Jake out of the cocoon and hovered his body in midair. He kicked, trying to swim out of the imprisoning aura, but only succeeds in looking and feeling foolish.

“There!” said the changeling queen. “Now that I've silenced your laughter, let me see just what I've caught.” Her magic pulled his shirt over to top of his head and tossed it aside, and she leaned forward to examine his bare chest.

“Hm, nothing exceptional on the surface,” she observed, lightly bruising Jake’s ego. “Perhaps the answers lie elsewhere?”

The changeling’s aura deftly undid Jake’s belt, and in one motion pulled his pants entirely off his legs. She rotated his body so he was facing her head-on, then tugged down the front of his boxers. Jake reflexively attempted to cover his crotch with both hands, but the aura kept his arms firmly at his sides.

Chrysalis squinted dispassionately at his cock, gradually coming to some kind of judgment. “Interesting shape,” she said. “No great surprises, otherwise…” she smirked, raising her head to meet Jake’s eyes. “Perhaps I could get to know it better?” she asked. “If you'll provide me with a description, I could even transform myself into a female of your species… unless you prefer me like this, of course…”

Jake couldn't tell if Chrysalis was serious, but she wasn't waiting for an answer in any case. She pulled the front of his boxers back up and turned him around, so that his bottom was facing her… and then she paused.

“Oh,” she gasped, her eyes growing wide as they traced the curves of his ass. “Oh my. This is…” she drew a long breath. “What am I looking at? It's beautiful, it's unlike anything I've ever seen… is this what Twilight Sparkle was keeping hidden from me? She thought something so grand, so flawless, could belong to her?”

She raised her hoof and pressed it into one of Jake's asscheeks, depressing the soft flesh. She sighed, and her body shuddered, gripped by intense arousal. “Human,” she said, “you are mine. Your flawless rump is the jewel of the Changeling Queendom from this day forward. I did not anticipate that Princess Twilight’s obsession with you was purely aesthetic… or sensual… but now I understand. Like me, she saw your body and was entranced by the perfect curves of your marvelous human butt.”

She pressed both forehooves into Jake’s asscheeks and put her face right in his crack - at least, as far in as it could get with his boxers still in the way. “Did she touch you like this?” Chrysalis asked. “Did she worship and pleasure your ass? I promise, human, I will ravish you with passion that outshines her by a hundredfold.” She exhaled lustily, her breath grazing against his asshole. “I would not normally confess this, but I am suddenly very horny… my pussy is hot and wet like never before in my long life, and I am… almost fearful of how much more I shall desire you when I strip your bottom bare…”

Chrysalis held her breath and tugged Jake’s boxers down. She sighed blissfully as her eyes suddenly beheld Jake’s bare cheeks, and she wrapped her forelegs around his hips, nuzzling his cheeks with her face. “Oh, I never imagined…” she whispered. “I have to make you mine, human… if I cannot take your mind with magic, I will pleasure your asshole until you have no choice but to love me…”

Breathing hot breaths onto Jake’s pucker, Chrysalis wedged her snout into his asscrack, burrowing between his cheeks to discover the treasure within. She extended her tongue - a tongue Jake knew to be long and snakelike - and touched it against his asshole. Jake shuddered, but it was Chrysalis who seemed to extract the most pleasure from the interaction. She shivered, sighing plaintively, mumbling words like “perfect… glorious…” as she lapped at his butthole.

“Mmmph… what have you done to me?” she mumbled, between licks of Jake’s pucker. “I have never felt this way about anyone… never felt so drawn to anyone’s body… is this your secret, human? Your power? To inspire passion? Obsession?”

Jake felt his cock stiffening as Chrysalis pleasured his asshole. He was very susceptible to anal pleasuring, he’d discovered; but then, almost anyone would have been, given the enthusiasm that his partners brought to the task. He was still frightened of Chrysalis, in a way; he didn’t know what she had done in the past, only that she had kidnapped him and considered Twilight Sparkle her enemy. Still, she seemed to be entranced by his ass, just as normal ponies had been before. She probably wouldn’t allow him to come to harm, as long as she was in love with his butt… and Twilight and her friends would probably come to rescue him at some point.

Until then, Jake supposed, he could just enjoy what Chrysalis was doing to him. He’d come to accept that mares were going to love and worship his asshole, no matter how he felt about it, and there wasn’t much point feeling sorry for himself.

Chrysalis was trying to speak, Jake could tell; each time she licked her way up and down his asscrack, or circled his pucker with swirling motions of her tongue, about one and a half syllables made it out of her mouth. But she was too enchanted by his ass, far too hungry for the next lick, to waste any time speaking.

And Jake was nearly beyond words as well. Chryalis’ long, flexible tongue was masterful when it came to delivering pleasure, flicking and licking and tickling in a way that quickly brought Jake’s stiff cock to the edge of climax. Chrysalis’ warm slobber dripped down his asscrack and onto his quivering ballsack, and each flick of her tongue made his cock twitch. Jake grunted as he felt himself pass the point of no return, and his cock jerked upward involuntarily, shooting off successive jets of cum until his nuts had drained themselves entirely.

Chrysalis, far more concerned with her own pleasure than with Jake’s, didn’t let up. She was coming to her own orgasm, though; her moans became more desperate, higher, louder - until with one long muffled moan, she came. It must have been a devastating orgasm, from the sound of it; her forelegs trembled, and she fell to the floor, slumping down bonelessly as her climax wound down. The aura holding Jake in midair also drifted down to the floor, although its hold on his limbs didn’t weaken.

“Human,” she sighed, “I know now what it’s like to be another creature’s slave… with no will of my own, only the desire to worship and pleasure another… I am yours, human. I will keep you here until the end of time, and spend my days licking your divine butthole…”

Jake wasn’t sure that arrangement made Chrysalis his slave, but he doubted there was much to be gained by arguing the point. The important thing, he supposed, was that he wasn’t in danger; Chrysalis would likely remember to feed him, during the moments where her tongue was too sore to lick his asshole… and eventually, Twilight was sure to rescue him. He might even get a chance to escape on his own, although he didn’t have the slightest idea how he would make the journey home…

“More, I need more,” mumbled Chrysalis, shuffling towards Jake. Jake was prone, his body pinned to the floor by Chrysalis’ magic and his ass pointing into the air. “I am just as hungry for your asshole, human… even hungrier, now… I think I shall only love it more each day…”

She plunged her snout into his asscrack again, lapping at his slicked-up pucker with undiminished lust. Jake had barely had a minute to recover from his own climax, but he felt himself getting hard again. This wasn’t a surprise; Twilight Sparkle frequently spent hours between his asscheeks, losing whole evenings in the act of eating out his butthole - and to ensure that he always enjoyed it just as much, she cast a long-lasting version of the spell that allowed him to have limitless orgasms. It would be weeks, at least, before that spell wore off - and long as it remained, he could cum for hours.

So he settled in, letting his body relax as Chrysalis went to work. If Chrysalis had the stamina of a princess, she’d be stuck between his cheeks for one hell of a long time, and Jake would cum more times than he could count…

And he passed hours in a daze, his pucker relentlessly attacked by Chrysalis’ tireless tongue, his cock shooting off fresh loads every few minutes. The queen had little to say to him; each time she came, she took only a moment to recover her senses and dive back in, lapping at his asshole as though she were starving for it.

And she might have eaten him out for far longer, if Twilight Sparkle hadn’t blasted the door open and charged inside. Chrysalis’ neck jerked upward at the sound, and she glared sharply at the princess. “Twilight Sparkle,” she spat, “How dare you intrude on-” she glanced downward at the butt she’d momentarily abandoned, and the rage on her face melted into helpless hunger, her mouth dropping open and glistening with drool. “Leave us,” she said, “I must…”

She dropped back down, burying her face in Jake’s crack, and resumed licking his butthole. Twilight paused, listening for a moment to the sound of hungry, lusty lapping. Then the princess of friendship broke into laughter - which caused Chrysalis to emit a muffled sound of indignation, although she was powerless to raise her head from between Jake’s cheeks.

“Looks like you beat the queen all on your own, Jake!” said Twilight, approaching at a slow trot. “So how did it happen? Did you seduce her? Pull down your pants and hypnotize her with a wiggle of your butt? I’m sure you understand how powerful a weapon your butt is by now…”

“No, no, I didn’t… I don’t think it would have occurred to me…” gasped Jake, struggling to speak as Chrysalis brought him nearer to climax.

“Oh, you innocent thing…” chuckled Twilight. “I don’t mind you seducing other mares with your beautiful butt, as long as I get to watch…” She trotted around the open cocoon, coming close enough to get a good look at what Chrysalis was doing. “She’s certainly giving you a tongue-lashing, isn’t she Jake? I can hardly keep myself from shoving her out of the way and reclaiming your butt for myself… fortunately I know how to fortify myself against the enchantment.”

Chrysalis mumbled a few words into Jake’s buttcrack, words that might have been something along the lines of “get away from him!” - although it was difficult to tell. Her horn flashed green, and it launched a bolt of blazing power in her general direction. Her aim was awful, though; not only was she completed absorbed in her lust for Jake’s asshole, her eyes were pointed down into his asscrack. The shot went completely wide, sizzling against the far wall, and so did her next three.

“Oh my gosh, she’s really helpless, isn’t she?” laughed Twilight. “Your butt might be the most powerful thing in Equestria. Any time a mare steps out of line, we should just show her your bare butt and tell he she could lick it for a few hours if she agreed to act nice.”

Twilight squinted in focus, her horn glowing a deep swirling purple. “You know, it’s normally very difficult to cast this spell on a pony,” she said, “because it takes a lot of focus, and it’s pretty easy for a powerful opponent to resist it. But you’ve made Queen Chrysalis so helpless, Jake, that I think I can go ahead and do it. Thanks so much, Jake! Couldn’t have done it without you…” She leaned in and gave him a kiss on his bottom. Chrysalis shoved her aside, and Twilight just laughed.

“Queen Chrysalis,” said Twilight, “I’m about to bind your horn, rendering you powerless… and if you’d like to fight back, all you have to do is get your head out of Jake’s asscrack. Just stop licking that perfect, beautiful, delicious butthole, just deprive yourself of that pleasure and delight long enough to resist my spell. Can you do that, Chrysalis?”

Chrysalis wiggled her body back and forth, seemingly fighting her own hunger and trying to lift herself out of Jake’s buttcrack. But she barely managed to interrupt her frenzied licking; every time she managed to get her mouth an inch away from his pucker, she whimpered and fell back down, rimming him with renewed hunger.

“Ah, still a slave to your own pleasure, huh?” said Twilight. “I know how it feels, Chrysalis… I was the first one to see Jake’s bare ass after it was enchanted, and I fell in love instantly. Of course, I already thought he was pretty great before that… honestly, Chrysalis, as obsessed as you clearly are with his butthole, you don’t deserve him. I’d be furious at the way you’re licking my Jakey’s sweet little asshole… but the truth is, I like watching other mares rim his beautiful butt.”

Twilight fell back onto her butt and slipped her forehoof down to her pussy. “I really shouldn’t distract myself like this,” she said, “while I’m trying to seal off your magic. But I’m just like you, Chrysalis, I can’t help myself when Jakey’s rump is on display.” She ran her hoof up and down along her pussy lips, sighing with pleasure.

“Is she good at that, Jakey?” Twilight asked, rocking back and forth on her rump as she touched herself. “She’s got a funny-looking tongue, so it’s got to be a pretty new feeling. Is she good at making you cum? If you like her, Jakey, maybe we can let out of Tartarus from time to time and have a few hours of fun with her butthole. Just as long as I get to watch.”

“Ahh, here it comes,” said Twilight. “I’m going to seal away your magic, Queen Chrysalis, and you can’t even bring yourself to care, can you? That’s the power of a gorgeous human butt…”

Twilight’s purple aura materialized around Chrysalis’ horn, starting as a hazy mist and solidifying into a solid layer of dark, ominous purple. Jake felt the magic holding down his body dissipate, and he tested his limbs, moving them freely for the first time in hours. “Looks like you’re free!” said Twilight. “But don’t squirm out of there just yet, Jakey, she deserves a little more fun with you… because she’s going away for a long time.”

“Are you close, Chrysalis?” Twilight Sparkle teased, scooting closer to Chrysalis’ backside as she played with her own slick pussy. “Ooh, that green changeling pussy is flowing like a fountain, dripping all over the cavern floor… I bet you’re real close. Why don’t you go ahead and cum, Chrysalis… and while you’re at it, make sure to make Jakey shoot a big hot load too?”

Chrysalis was still mumbling in protest, struggling to voice her disdain while still licking Jake’s butthole… but those mumbles turned to plaintive whispers as her body shivered towards climax once more. She raised her head, and her cries echoed through the cavernous chamber as she fell back into a puddle of her own pussy juice.

“Aw, Jakey,” said Twilight, moving into the space Chrysalis had just vacated, “she didn’t make you cum, did she? I mean, not this time, anyway…” She turned to look at the changeling queen, who was still twitching with the aftershocks of her climax. “Stay right there,” Twilight said, using her magic to pin Chrysalis to the floor. “I’m going to finish the job.”

Twilight gave Jake’s butt a couple of quick kisses - one on one cheek, one on the other. “I’m so sorry I allowed Chrysalis to take you, Jakey… I’ll keep you safe from now on, because you’re so much more than just a butt to me.” She giggled, realizing the absurdity of what she’d just said. “That having been said, though… even though I’ve warded myself against the ‘want it, need it” spell, your butt is still irresistible. I hope you don’t mind if I indulge myself, Jakey, just once… or maybe a couple times.”

“Sure,” laughed Jake. Then he shuddered, as Twilight Sparkle’s furry snout dug its way between his asscheeks and he felt the familiar touch of her tongue on his butthole. She knew his body better than Chrysalis did - she knew how his butthole reacted to motion and pressure, she knew how to tease him into a mindblowing climax. And in no time at all, Jake was writhing on the floor, his cock throbbing, his balls tightening, and his load shooting explosively onto the floor.

“Mmm, that’s my sweet Jakey,” purred Twilight - and then she dove back in for a second round.

Chapter 4

Jake ran a brush through his hair and examined himself in the bathroom mirror. He’d been keeping himself in good shape lately; being in a relationship with Princess Twilight Sparkle had given him plenty of motivation to take care of himself.

To be honest, though, it probably wasn't all that necessary. His most attractive feature was his butt… and the main reason it was attractive was the enchantment that still clung to it. Even if he wasn't in good shape, that spell would make his ass irresistible to mares. Any mare who saw his bare butt was overcome with lust, compelled to bury their snout between his cheeks and lick his puckered asshole.

For that reason, Jake was careful about keeping his butt covered. He could have walked out into the bedroom, fully nude, and there would be little risk that anyone would see him… but he wrapped a towel around his waist anyway, just in case.

He stepped out of the bathroom and into the royal bedchamber of Princess Twilight Sparkle. He still had a place of his own, but he was spending more and more nights here, at the princess’ behest. Thanks to her mental fortitude and a counterspell of her devising, Twilight was quite good at resisting Jake’s irresistible butt… but sometimes she allowed herself to “fall victim” to it, and spend an hour or two making out with his butthole. It had become her favorite way to unwind after a day of work or a daring adventure, so she insisted on having Jake around as much as possible.

She wasn't around at the moment, due to a diplomatic meeting with someone or other, so Jake had some time to himself. Twilight had given him loads of books to read, so he didn't lack for entertainment… but first, he'd need to get dressed.

Over the past few weeks, Jake had become more and more “moved in” to the castle - first a toothbrush, and now a dresser drawer that was all his own. With a towel still wrapped around his waist, he crossed the room and reached his hand towards the dresser…

And then a flash of light and a crash of thunder made his head jerk upwards. Twilight’s bedroom had a tall set of glass double doors leading out to a wide balcony - and when the lightning flashed, Jake saw the familiar contours of the castle silhouetted by the brilliant light.

Except… there was something different about the view. Jake had looked out of this window enough times that he knew the view by heart - every jagged line of the crystal castle’s outer walls. And there was something new there, a smooth shape hanging from the underside of a higher balcony. What was that?

Jake squinted and looked out the window. Without a bolt of lightning illuminating the vicinity, it was too dark to make anything out… but he was sure he'd seen something. Cautiously, he unlocked the glass door and opened it just a crack, fixing his eyes on the spot where he'd seen the unfamiliar shape…

There was another crash of thunder and a flash of lightning. Once again, the castle’s exterior was lit up by powerful, bright light - but this time the shape was gone.

Jake sighed as he turned away from the door. He'd been certain that there was something there - something that looked as if it could have been alive. Had it moved, between the lightning strikes? Or had he just been imagining it?

Well, whatever it was, Jake would feel more ready to face it after he got dressed. He opened the dresser and regarded his options - a few pairs of boxers, several shirts in solid colors, a couple pairs of pants…

Lightning flashed again - and when Jake turned his head to look at the balcony, he saw something new. The silhouette of a pony… but a pony with bat-like wings where a pegasus would have feathery ones. It was standing on the balcony, wings spread, looking right at Jake. As he stared at the pony, frozen in place, Jake tried to remember whether he'd locked the balcony door when he shut it. He wouldn't have forgotten, right?

The pony trotted to the double doors, put its forehoof on the knob, and slowly pushed them open. As it entered the light of Twilight's bedchamber, Jake finally got a look at the winged intruder: a charcoal-black pony with a short red mane and a set of leathery wings folded against its back. Its fearsome yellow eyes were set in a face that surprisingly soft, even pretty… it was a mare, Jake realized.

Of course, Jake knew better than anyone how dangerous mares could be in Equestria. Some of them were powerful princesses or devious changeling queens… and even the average mare, when she was driven mad with lust, was a force to be reckoned with. And this mare was nothing like any pony he’d seen before… Were those bat wings real? Natural? Supernatural?

“Hey,” said Jake, straightening his back and trying to look fearless. “This is Twilight Sparkle’s castle! If you’re trying to break in, you’re going to have to deal with her.”

The mare stood there, stone-faced and silent, long enough that Jake began to doubt that she understood him. But then her lips curled upwards, and her nostrils flared as she silently huffed. “It talks,” she said, with amusement in her voice. “Anyway, I don’t see Princess Twilight anywhere around here. So it looks to me like I’m just dealing with you.”

Jake took a step back, eyeing the door that led into the hallway. “What are you doing here?” He asked.

“Can’t a girl just find herself a place to hide from the rain?” asked the bat-mare, taking a step towards Jake. “What is it about me that makes you think I’m… nefarious?” She licked her lips with a long, wickedly red tongue. She was beautiful, actually… dark and sinister with a long crimson mane, eyes glowing with purpose. Her movements were slow and seductive as she trotted toward Jake, sizing him up like a fresh kill.

“Hey,” said Jake, “I’m warning you, you don’t wanna-”

The mare spread her wings and opened her mouth, baring a set of gleaming white fangs. When Jake recoiled, the mare laughed and leapt into the air, flapping her wings to maintain her altitude. She hovered above Jake, still laughing, and Jake backed up further, until he felt the back of his ankles hit the edge of Twilight’s bed. Shit! He had to-

But he didn’t have time to clamber over the bed, or even to turn around. The mare swooped down and tackled him, sending him sprawling onto the soft, springy bed. She was on top of him, pinning him down, her bare chest warm and furry against his. She was grinning, breathing heavy, her tongue flapping out between her two lower fangs.

“What are you?” asked the mare, sniffing at Jake’s face. “Some kind of rare beast from beyond the borders of Equestria? I didn’t know that Princess Twilight had a taste for… exotic delights.” She lowered her face and dragged her tongue across Jake’s cheek with an exaggerated moan.

Jake squirmed, struggling beneath the menacing mare. She was too heavy to simply throw off, and his limbs were pinned down too firmly to launch a proper punch or kick. Besides, escalating the encounter might not be the smartest idea… maybe he could talk this mare down instead.

“My name’s Jake,” he said. “I'm a human. Twilight is my… I'm, you know, with her.”

That may have been the wrong thing to say, because it made the mare’s yellow eyes grow wide with excitement. “Really!” she exclaimed. “Well, since I’m a sinister home invader, maybe I should plunder Princess Twilight’s greatest treasure.” She licked Jake’s other cheek. “My name’s Shadow Bloom. You should probably know that, since we’re going to get to know each other so well…”

Shadow Bloom brought her face down to meet Jake’s lips, and her tongue slithered into his mouth. She moaned sensually, writhing her body against Jake’s bare chest, as she took command of his mouth with this forceful, passionate kiss. Her lower body was grinding against his crotch… and inevitably, his dick started to stiffen. He tried to keep it down, to will his cock to stay soft - but with a warm body rubbing against him, there was nothing he could do to stop it.

“Ooh!” said Shadow Bloom, lifting her head when she felt the stiffness beneath Jake’s towel. “I wasn’t sure if you ‘humans’ even had dicks… but I’m feeling something big and hard under there.” She moved her hips back and forth again, slowly grinding herself against him. “Mmm… maybe I should rip off that towel and see for myself what a human cock looks like!”

“No!” protested Jake, thrashing beneath the bat-pony. “Get off me!”

“Oh, come on, I just want a little look,” teased Shadow Bloom. “What are you worried about, Jakey? Are you worried Twilight won't take you back if I decide to wrap my lips around your cock? Do you think the princess will banish you from Equestria if she walks in here and sees me riding your cock?”

She wiggled her hips, slowly working the towel downwards. “Oh, Jakey, don't worry,” she said, in a mocking faux-gentle tone. “If you’re Twilight’s sexy little human pet, I'm sure she'll still love you… even if she comes in here and finds the scent of bat-pony pussy on your cock…”

Still tugging at Jake’s towel, Shadow Bloom lifted her body a fraction of an inch - and Jake finally managed to struggle himself free. He clawed at the covers of the bed, pulling himself away from Shadow Bloom and scrambling across the bed…

But one corner of his towel was still pinned beneath the mare’s knee- so when Jake crawled across the bed, the towel didn't come with him. He was naked, his bare bottom up in the air - and as soon as he realized he was exposed, he heard the flap of leathery wings and felt the weight of the bat-mare’s body landing heavily on his legs. Shadow Bloom had tackled him again - but this time, her face was right over Jake’s butt.

“Woah,” said Shadow Bloom. This time her voice wasn't mocking - there was genuine awe in it. “So this is what you were hiding under that towel. It's…” she paused, and a little involuntary moan escaped her throat. “It's really something.”

Jake bit his lip in anticipation of what he knew was coming. Judging by Shadow Bloom’s reaction, bat ponies weren't immune to the “want-it need-it” enchantment. Trying to make a run for it now was probably pointless; the mare had already demonstrated repeatedly that she could tackle him faster than he could make an escape. Twilight would show up eventually, and until then… well, there were worse ways to pass the time.

Still, he had an obligation to put up at least a token resistance. “Hey,” he said, “Twilight’s not going to like it if she finds you staring at my butt…”

“So you're saying I'm in trouble?” asked Shadow Bloom. “Mmm, I'm in hot water with the Princess of Friendship… the mare who defeated Equestria’s most fearsome villains?” She rested her cheek on Jake’s buttcrack, nuzzling it with her furry face. “Wow, I'm doomed. I better find a way to enjoy the last few moments of my life, before Twilight Sparkle vaporizes me with rainbow lasers…”

Shadow Bloom let her tongue flop out again, and dragged it along his asscrack. “Since I've got this beautiful butt in front of me, and only moments left to live… I think I'll spend the rest of my life exploring your perfect asscrack.”

She swept her tongue down Jake’s buttcrack - and this time, she applied just a bit more pressure. Her tongue went deeper, parting Jake’s cheeks just a bit more, and she sighed with satisfaction as she lifted her head. “Jake,” she said, through panting breaths, “the taste of your skin… so clean, and so… mph, I need more…”

When she went in for another lick, she was ravenous, slurping her way up and down his crack, wetting it with her glistening red tongue. She couldn't stop herself; she dug deeper and deeper, burrowing her snout into the cleft between his cheeks. Each lick took her deeper - and finally her tongue grazed along his puckered asshole.

Even that light, grazing touch triggered a powerful reaction. From Twilight's explanations, Jake knew that the “want it, need it” spell was most powerfully concentrated at his butthole; the sight of his bare bottom was powerful, but the sight of his asshole was absolutely intoxicating. And licking his asshole had just given Shadow Bloom an overpowering dose of the aphrodisiac magic. Her hips shook, and her marehood spasmed; a single taste of Jake’s butthole had brought her to climax, and she was hungry for more.

Jake’s cock twitched when Shadow Bloom’s tongue touched his asshole. It wasn't enough to make him spontaneously climax, unlike the bat-winged mare, but he was sure she would get him there eventually. Depending on how long it took Twilight to return to her bedchamber, Shadow Bloom could make him cum once, twice… maybe more, if her long, wet tongue was passionate enough…

And she was certainty bringing an admirable level of enthusiasm to the task. Every time her tongue touched Jake’s asshole, a pulse of intense pleasure went through her pussy - so she was going faster, licking furiously, working herself up to an even bigger climax. Her nimble tongue swirled around his pucker, pressing harder against it, and Jake grasped handfuls of the bedsheets as the stimulation made his cock twitch.

“”Oh my God,” groaned Jake, “You really… you have a really strong tongue, Shadow Bloom. It’s… oh shit, you’re gonna make me cum, I’m gonna… nnngh…”

But just before she sent him over the edge, Shadow Bloom lifted her head from Jake’s asscrack. “I’m going to make you cum, Jakey?” She asked breathlessly. “Oh wow… am I better at this than Twilight? I bet she does this every night… every morning… I know that if this gorgeous butt belonged to me, I’d never be able to keep my tongue out of it. If you want someone who’ll be a perfect, dirty slut for your asshole, Jake, you’ll never find a better mare than me…” She set her hooves on Jake’s cheeks and pulled them apart, licking her lips in anticipation of the next taste. “I’m going to make a deal with you, okay? If I can make you cum harder than Twilight does, then you’ll be mine. I’ll swoop you up, and you’ll live with me in the shadows, Jake. Just the two of us, in the darkness, my tongue deep inside your deepest darkness…”

She dropped back down, once again burying her face in Jake’s ass. She kept speaking, though, mumbling into Jake’s buttcrack and occasionally lifting her head enough that Jake could make out a few words.

“Your princess isn't gonna save you…”

“...gonna make you cum so fuckin’ hard, Jake…”

“...fuck, oh fuck, what a tasty fuckin’ asshole…”

Another powerful shudder went through Shadow Bloom’s body, and she groaned into Jake’s asscrack, twisting her tongue against his butthole as she came. The pressure finally pushed Jake to the limit, and he shot his load onto the purple bedsheets beneath him. His throbbing member erupted over and over, splattering the sheets with gushes of hot spunk.

When Jake’s climax was ending, Shadow Bloom’s was still ongoing. Panting heavily, her mane slick with sweat, she lifted her face from Jake’s buttcrack and rested her head on his cheeks.

“Jake,” she sighed, “we came together, Jake… that means you're mine…”

“That was good,” said Jake, “but Twilight-”

“Twilight’s not here,” said Shadow Bloom. “It's just you and me and your butt. It can be just us, Jake, you and me forever. Let me take you away from this, Jake. We’ll make a home together in the darkness, and I'll give your asshole all the love it can handle.”

“No,” mumbled Jake. “I love Twilight, Shadow Bloom…”

“I’ll make you love me more,” said Shadow Bloom. “I'll worship your perfect butthole, I'll kiss it and lick it every moment of every day, we’ll cum together, again and again…”

She went back down, sandwiching her face between Jake’s cheeks and noisily slurping at his asshole. He knew she could make him cum over and over, again and again, until Twilight intervened. Twilight had enchanted his body to be capable of limitless orgasms, permitting him to enjoy hours-long ass-eating sessions almost as much as the mare who was licking his pucker. And it was a good thing, too; he knew by now that he couldn’t overpower a mare who was in the grip of the “want it, need it” spell. Jake was a mere human, and every mare he’d met was either stronger, faster, or more magical than him.

Shadow Bloom felt another shudder go through her body, and she moaned into Jake’s buttcrack as she twisted her tongue against his asshole. The faster and harder she licked, the more her pussy dripped and her thighs quivered - and soon the bat-mare was coming again, nectar running down her back legs as pleasure shot through her quaking body.

And at the very moment her moans died down, the bedroom door clicked and started to swing open. Twilight Sparkle had finally arrived - but she was coming in backwards, pushing the door inward with her rump. “Hey Jake,” she said, “sorry to leave you alone so long, but the ambassador never showed up! I don’t know if it’s a… deliberate snub, or something? Things have always been slightly tense between us and -”

Twilight finally turned around and saw the tableau before her. Her human boyfriend, buck naked, with a red-maned bat-mare burying her face in his asscheeks.

“Twilight!” said Jake. “She just flew in through the window, and she saw me naked, and… well, you know…”

“Oh, I know,” said Twilight, trotting casually towards the bed as a smile formed on her face. “I know my slutty human boyfriend will shake his ass for any mare who looks his way, because he can’t go a half hour without getting his ass licked.”

“Twilight, you know I didn’t-”

“Didn’t spare a moment’s thought for your girlfriend when you saw a ‘bad girl’ you could seduce with your beautiful butt?” said Twilight. “Oh, I know. You like to test me, Jakey, to humiliate me, by reminding me you could have any mare you wanted.” She stuck out her bottom lip in an exaggerated pout. “Jakey, when will my love be enough for you? How can I prove that I’m the perfect match for your magnificent asshole?”

She hopped onto the bed and lowered her face until it was inches from Jake’s. “Did she make you cum, Jakey? Can she make you cum like I do? I just love making that cock of yours shoot a big sticky load of spunk… and that’s why I can’t stay mad at you. No matter how naughty you are, no matter how many strange mares you offer your butt to, I still love you, Jakey…”

She closed her eyes and pressed her lips against’s Jake’s, penetrating his mouth with her hot, wet tongue. While Shadow Bloom made out with his asshole, Twilight went to work on his mouth - and the sight of her glowing horn told Jake that she was using her magic to stimulate her marehood. As usual, Twilight didn’t mind the sight of Jake getting his ass licked by a stranger; rather, she found it to be a huge turn-on.

And Jake didn’t mind what was happening either. He had the attention of two adoring mares - one who was a dark and dangerous intruder, and one who was his devoted girlfriend. His cock throbbed, his hips quaking as climax approached. Twilight must have sensed it, because she lifted her head and moaned to Jake: “Jake… cum for me, Jake… cum for me, now… I’m already close, Jakey, I want us to cum together…”

Then she kissed him again, filling his mouth with her tongue, plunging her magical aura deep into her marehood. Jake felt climax rising inside him again, stronger than before; his nuts tightened against his crotch, his body lurched, and he came again. He moaned into Twilight’s mouth as he spilled his seed onto the bedsheets - and Twilight thrust her magic into herself one last time, giving her pussy the final push it needed. She lifted her face, breaking the kiss and letting her moans fill the tall bedchamber.

And when her climax subsided, she surrounded Jake’s body with her aura and yanked him away from the bed. Shadow Bloom, left with no asshole to lick, gasped and raised her head, gaping open-mouthed at Twilight and Jake. “No,” she moaned, “Give him back, I was close, I need his ass-”

“Oh, relax,” said Twilight. “You’ll be fine! Here, let me help you out.” She cast a spell, encircling Shadow Bloom with whispers of silver light. “There, that should make it easier to deal with the compulsion.”

Shadow Bloom shook her head and flexed her wings as her mind gradually cleared. “Uh… yeah,” she said. “That feels… better…” She looked at Jake’s ass again, and while her mouth was still watering, she was able to resist the urge to lunge at him. “Holy shit, that ass is incredible… I’ve never had anything like that before.”

“Oh, my Jake’s ass is pretty amazing, all right,” said Twilight, setting Jake down and releasing him from her aura. “I was wondering why you missed our appointment, Ambassador Shadow Bloom. I guess if there’s any ass in Equestria worth risking an international incident for, it’s his.”

“Hm,” scoffed Shadow Bloom. “But you’re not going to hold it against me, are you, Princess Twilight?” she asked. “Or against the bat ponies? We are both grown mares, Your Highness; we shouldn’t allow a little indiscretion to jeopardize our shared interests.”

Twilight cocked an eyebrow. “This is more than a little indiscretion,” she said. “You broke into my bedroom and plundered my boyfriend’s asshole with your naughty tongue. You came here to represent your people, and instead you’re tempting the wrath of an alicorn.”

Shadow Bloom laughed. “What can I say?” she said. “Among all the bat-ponies, I’m one of the most powerful and most feared mares. I’m used to taking what I want! Especially when it comes to stallions.” She raised a hoof and flipped her mane casually. “But in the name of… friendship… I’ll do what it takes to make amends. So - what would you have me do, Princess?”

Twilight clapped her forehooves together, and her stern look broke into a bright smile “I’m so happy you’re reaching out a hoof to me, Shadow Bloom. We shouldn’t let our differences come between us. Instead, we should bond over things that bring us together.”

She used her magic to give Jake a gentle push - just enough to make him topple forward onto the bed. Once again he was face-down, ass in the air - but this time his butt was facing Twilight. She set a purple hoof down on his asscheeks, massaging the soft skin with a slow, rhythmic motion. “Okay,” she said, “We were supposed to speak to each other across a table, and I know how boring how that can be. So, instead… why don’t we bond over something much more fun? We can take turns with Jake’s butt until we’re the best of friends! How long can you stick around?”

“I’m a bat pony, Princess,” said Shadow Bloom. “I can go all night long.”