Money Is Everything

by PewDashiePie

9 - The Crystal Empire (Part Two)

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Princess Celestia looked into my eyes, and stood up.

Oh fuck, was it something I said?

"Very well," She began. "On one condition."

I raised a brow at her. "Yes?"

"I want him dead."

My jaw dropped, hidden behind my bandana.

Was she serious? No, she couldn't be. I've heard so many good things about Princess Celestia! Probably too good, now that I think about it.. I wonder if it's because she's secretly tyrannical or some shit...

Nah, I take it back. She's probably just pissed about the crap that Dwight might be stirring up. Hell, I know that he pisses me off. So I can't really say that I blame her.

"Auntie–" Cadence frowned.

"I just want him gone. Bring him back to me alive, dead, or even in half.." Celestia looks down at Twilight, and notices the unsureness in her eyes.

With a sigh, she continues.
"I don't mean to be so straightforward, my apologies. It's just that I've seen what has come out of it thus far, and I don't want to see more of it."

I looked up at Celestia and gave her a confident nod.

"I understand, princess. If I get the opportunity to do anything about it, I'll be sure to take it."

"Good, I'll brief you tomorrow then. Surely you're both tired after such a long trip." Celestia glances up at the throne room doors.

"Twilight, would you mind showing our friend here to the Royal Guest rooms?"

Twilight, quick on the command, jumps up and goes to trot off... "Oh, I almost forgot!"

She turns right back around, with a blush of embarrassment on her face.

"Our guest has a lady friend back home, and he was wondering if you'd send messages from Spike, to him?"

Celestia raises a brow and glares, as if she's getting ready to scold Twilight.

But then a smile forms, and she blurts out a chuckle. "Of course I will! I don't mind at all, Twilight."

From there, Twilight leads me to the guest rooms.

I take the room next to her, give her my thanks, and head inside. The only things on my mind are a shower, and sleep.


I'm woken up in the middle of the night by a few knocks at my door.

With a groan, I crawled out of my bed and answered it with a tired mumble.
"Mhmm?"

"I'm sorry to bother you, Cross." Twilight whispers, "I can't sleep.. I've been so restless over everything–"

"Are you asking if you can sleep here for the night?" I ask, rubbing my eyes.

Twilight nods gently. "I don't know what else to do, not even sleeping spells will do the trick, and to be honest– I think I just need a friend."

"Don't sweat it, I understand." With a yawn, I crawled back into bed and over to the far side.

Twilight climbed in after me, and pulled the blanket up to her chest. We lay on our sides, facing opposite directions.

"This isn't awkward for you or anything, is it?" Twilight whispered, making sure I was alright with this.

I yawned, "Not at all, Twilight."

The next morning after I had taken yet another shower, I combed my mane and put on my bandana. When I stepped out of the bathroom, Twilight was already gone; presumably to her room to get dressed like I was.

With no need to waste any time, I figured I'd do a little sight seeing of the castle. I didn't plan on straying too far, and upon exiting the room, I bumped into the side of a guard who had been traversing the hall.

He fumbled and hit the wall.

Before I could apologize, I was pinned against the very same wall that he had just gotten knocked into. Let me tell you, crystal walls aren't cozy.

"What the fuck?" I growled and headbutted him, denting his helmet and freeing myself from his grasp.

Twilight came rushing out of her room with a wet mane. "Stop, please, stop!"

I held one hoof to my head for a second, while the guard got back onto his hooves.

"What happened?!" Twilight, completely thrown off, looked from one of us to the other.

"I bumped into him on my way out of the room– musta' caught him off guard or something.."

The guard, clutching his head, blinked rapidly and took a second to let his vision focus. "This buffoon just came fumbling out of his room like he had a race to win–"

"So your immediate response is to SLAM me against a wall? Wow, so good at your job!"

"Stop it! Both of you need to take a minute to calm down now!" Twilight got between us. A few drops of water plopped onto the floor as her mane flowed with her body movement.

I leaned against the wall and closed my eyes lightly. "If we don't both have a concussion, then one of us just suffered brain damage."

"Was that an insult?" The guard mumbles.

All I could do was laugh, even though it came out as more of a chuckle.

"You're so damned impulsive. No, it wasn't an insult."

Twilight let out a sigh.

"How long have you been on the job?" I asked him.

"Well I started training about a year or two ago-"

"No, I mean on the job," I chuckled again.

"About three months," He finally said confidently.

"Seriously? Shit, I'm sorry kid.." I looked at the dent in his helmet for a second.

"I'm not much of a kid," He lowered his hooves with a sigh.

"Yeah, and I'm probably only a few years older than you are."

"Heh, I wouldn't doubt it. It's alright, by the way, and I'm sorry too." The guard made sure to look me in the eyes when he apologized.

To be honest, I badly wanted to inform him of just how lucky he is, and how I could've accidentally killed him out of reflex.
But I suppose forgiveness is more civilized, and far less threatening.

"Well, it seems everything else is fine here. Continue your patrol, but be careful, okay?" Twilight convinces him to get back to work.

The guard nods at her, then at me, and proceeds to head down the hall.

A moment after he turns the corner and disappears out of hearing range, I turn to Twilight. Her mane is still dripping, but other than that she's practically dressed for the day.

"Twilight, I'm sorry about that–"

"It's fine, Cross," She said in a hushed voice, staying careful when speaking my name. "That wasn't your fault, there's no need to be sorry."

I nod and look at her mane.

"Well, I won't keep you.. Go ahead and finish up, I'll wait."

She offers a smile, "It won't take long, just drying off and brushing... Where were you going, anyways?"

"I got bored and I'm already fancied up, so I was going to do a little looking around." I told her the truth.

Yeah right, as if she'd ever given me a reason not to.

"Like I said, this shouldn't take but ten or fifteen minutes. You can join me if you'd like, it'd probably be safer than just wandering around anyways."

I shrugged, "Might as well, seeing as how I almost murdered a guy.."

Twilight giggled and retreated back into her room to finish up, with me trailing behind her.

Once we were inside and the door was shut, Twilight cast a spell that sent a magenta aura from her horn and briefly encompassed the door, along with the walls.

"Just soundproofing the room." She said, as she made her way over to the bathroom.

I took off my bandana and tossed it onto her bed. "My god, what the hell just happened."

Twilight, having left the bathroom door open while she dried her mane, raises her voice slightly. "Cross, it was just a rookie making a mistake."

I let out a sigh and sat on the bed.

"I almost made an even bigger mistake, Twilight." I called back in an ashamed tone.

"I've hurt ponies before, Twi.. I try not to think about it, about the life of crime I came from; but when a scenario like what we were just in occurs, part of me doesn't remember the pain that comes from it. My mind goes back to survival, and–"

An even deeper sigh escapes me.

"I could've killed that guard, Twilight. I got ahold of my senses- of course after the fact that I gave him a concussion, but If I hadn't thought so quickly..."

Twilight grabs a brush with her magic and comes back into the room, walking around the bed before getting on it beside me.

"What matters is you did think, and you didn't resort to beating him senseless," She brushes her mane as she speaks.

"As long as you can manage to take a step back for just a second, at least mentally, you'll be showing improvement. That could have gotten really ugly, Cross. I know it."

I lay down, and cross my hooves under my head. "Well yeah, but–"

"You were able to calmly explain yourself right after slamming your temple into a metal helmet."

I smiled at that, and nodded a little.
"When you put it like that, it's hard to disagree."

About twenty minutes later, we were just ready to go see Celestia and Cadence. Instead, one of them came to us. More importantly, it was Celestia and not Cadence.

I was the one standing next to the door when it was knocked on. Twilight was standing beside the bed with her satchel just recently thrown over her, so being the closest I opened it.

"Oh, you're here too. Good. I have a few questions for you." She looked slightly down at me.

I was a little concerned, but instead of saying anything my body moved to the side to let her in.

"We were just leaving to come see you and Cadence to find out what we're going to do." Twilight laughed a little.

Celestia had to duck a bit to get inside.

"Well I was hoping to get a little bit more information from your nameless friend." She looked over at me with a simple smile.

"Like what, princess?" I asked, hoping she'd give me an idea of what she needed to know, and not leave me to guess what exactly it is that she wants to hear.

"Well my little pony, for starters I was thinking something along the lines of what 'little birdy' you spoke of before and a little more about yourself. I'd be a fool to take advice from you or let you help in this case if I didn't even know whom exactly I would be bringing into such a mess."

I nodded, "I'm a bounty hunter, princess. No offense, but the 'little birdy' is of no use anymore. I'm afraid I can't tell you where they are, as I do not know, but they were a changeling who wanted to see mister Callahan gone. Apparently had a grudge or something."

Celestia sighed, disappointed. "Continue, tell me a bit about yourself."

"I'm from Manehattan, or at least I like to think of myself from Manehattan, but the bank robbery affected my hometown city; hence the reason I want to assist in taking care of this problem, for nothing in return. I wear the bandana due to the profession, and this may be the only time you'll ever see me without it. As for not having a name, I was not born at a hospital or a medical center, but rather a forest as my parents were travelers. I have no birth certificate, nor documentation, for a name. My mother died in birth, and my father was killed shortly after. I was discovered from my wails of crying by a hunter, who took me in. He never gave me a name, either... I was just 'kid' to him."

I paused for a moment, and when Celestia didn't say anything, I continued.

"When I was finally capable of learning to read and write, he too, passed away. A smart colt, I took food, a few mementos, and kept moving until I was out of that forest I had been bound to my whole life. I found a tiny village, where I stayed until I was a young stallion. I hunted just like the stallion who raised me, to make money. From there, I was destined to travel to other towns and cities, after I had taken up a talent for hunting down equines that the law could not personally get ahold of. Manehatten is where I found the most business... Is there anything else you'd like to know about me, princess? I'm open to that much, for sure."

Celestia thought about it for a moment before shaking her head. "I suppose not.. However, if you could give me anymore details about this 'Dwight Callahan', I'd be forever grateful. We're all in this together, hunter."

"Sure.. But first, what do you already know?"

Her eyes looked to Twilight, and then back to me. "He's violent, has no care for life, and is somehow doing all of this without being seen in the act."

I nodded, "That sounds like him. Have you considered that his victims are being lured away and into a more seclude place before being killed?"

"Indeed, but that was a very recent conclusion for us. We have not yet sent out a search for said areas or tested said ideas. You might be able to help with that, though we do have guards who could help as well."

"That's great.. But princess, I've gotten more info about this stallion from that 'little birdy', I just haven't gotten to it yet. The most crucial thing is that he's been known to have influencers paid off to spy for him, from just about every branch and class. You will need to be very careful about sending out searches, because the information of a planned search party might reach him before the party has even departed; meaning that even if you're sending a search to the right place, everything could be moved by the time you get there."

Celestia looks a little frustrated and sighs, lowering her head. "This is worse than I thought..."

"But it can be done, princess. Just in moderation."

Celestia raises her head to face me again. "What else do you know, hunter?"

I sigh and rub my chin with a hoof in thought. "There's more, but I can't seem to pull it back to me.."

I made a frustrated expression and sighed again, this time deeper. "I'll let you know as it all comes to me, princess. It was one discussion, so I have trouble remembering all of it word for word."

Celestia nods, "That's alright, just be sure to seek me once these things come back to your mind... And if we're done here, let's go discuss what Cadence and I have so far."

"That's more than fine with me." I looked over my shoulder to Twilight.

"What're we waiting for?" She came over in an impatiently quick trot, "Let's go, then."

As we grew closer and closer to the throne room, Twilight increasingly became more somber. It was blatantly obvious by the time we entered the room. The look in her eyes said it all.

Cadence looked to us as we came in, and let out a small sigh. "Everypony but Ambrose, you are dismissed."

The guards, all of them but one standing to the side of her throne, made their way out of the room.

"Where is Shining Armor?" Twilight asked Cadence.

Cadence responds to her sister-in-law, "He doesn't handle blood or death so well, and after a few days he couldn't take it. I forgave him, and until this is resolved, he's in Canterlot."

Twilight nods and her gaze drifts to the guard that Cadence had referred to as Ambrose. He's a crystal pony with an aqua coat and a brown mane.

"Oh shoot, I almost forgot! I'm sorry, this is Ambrose Aurichalcite– he's my right hand while Shiny is gone. Ambrose, you've met Celestia. This is my sister-in-law Twilight, and this her friend who will be helping us with the case."

Ambrose nods at each of us as we're introduced, and then steps forward.

"We've found more remains.. A single pony."

Celestia frowns, Twilight's face goes pale and me.. I just look back at Ambrose, waiting for what he has to say next.

"I suggest you take a look at the crime scene and autopsy photos–" Ambrose pauses, "But they're definitely not pretty, they made me feel quite a mix of emotions."

Celestia steps forward without hesitation. "I have to. They're my little ponies.."

She gets a small stack of photos from Ambrose, and shuffles through them. I counted twelve total, and four that made her really wince, as well as look a little closer.

"There's a few in here that are... Really bad, but nonetheless important."

Celestia looks at Twilight.
"Do you- I mean are you, wanting to take a look?"
Her voice was enough to suggest she probably shouldn't.

I didn't know just how badly this would get to Twilight, until I saw her shuffle through just three pictures.

At the first one, she let out a pained sigh. The second one turned her face into one of disgust and confusion, and at the third she turned away with a green face, holding the pictures out to be taken.
After a second she caught her breath, having been holding it to avoid gagging.
"Why would anypony—" Her voice broke a little, "They.. They went too far."

I frowned slightly and took the pictures from Twilight. I immediately saw why it was a problem. The first picture I stared down at was of a young mare, probably around the same age as the guard I bumped into in the hall. She was smiling a little bit and the sunlight reflected off her crystal figure. She was alive in this picture.

I flipped it to the next one.

Now the mare was dead, and laying on her side. Judging by the position she was in, the picture had been taken as if they were approaching the corpse, as her back was facing the camera and her front was not visible. What was worrying was that directly in front of her you could see a glimpse of much darker snow, as if coming from the front of her body.
Her back had some bloody gashes, like from a fall, and there was a gunshot wound on her neck that left an open meaty area.

Without preparing myself, I turned to the third picture.

My god was it bad. This one was taken from the front and, needless to say, the mare's stomach and chest were exposed–
Not really the right way to put it.. More like she was eviscerated. Mostly all of her organs lay open in the snow, and her ribcage had been broken. Her heart was gone, along with a few other organs such as her liver. To make matters worse, her face was literally frozen in time, with a look of utter fear and betrayal. The cold temperatures had frozen her eyes, and her crystal coat hadn't returned to it's non-crystalized state. Normally it would have, but she was literally frozen, seemingly just moments after dying.

There was no doubt that her stomach and chest being ripped open was done post-mortem. No, the gunshot is what killed her.

With the hoof I held the photos in, I wrapped my arm around Twilight and gave her a quick hug.

"I've told you before.. We're going to get to the bottom of this, Twi."

I looked at Ambrose and Cadence. "Where was she found?"

Princess Cadence looked back at me sullenly. "Near the mountains at the Southern border of the Empire. The thing is, she's the only one we've found in the snow, and the only one so far South–"

"Sorry to interrupt, but where were the other two found?"

Ambrose speaks up. "To the East, bordering the mountains that surround the empire. Just laying there at the base of the mountain."

I nod and look back to Twilight. "I know where I want to go, then. We leave in the morning."

With one glance to Cadence and Ambrose, I turned to face Celestia.

"Princess.. I've remembered more, if you'd like to stop by my room sometime."

Cadence returns the look and gives one nod.

Without even bothering to look at the rest of the pictures, I return them to Ambrose Aurichalcite. From there, Twilight and I head out of the room, down a few different halls, and into my room; which she sound proofs just like before.

"I want to check the Northern border of the Empire."

Twilight curiously gazes at me.
"Why? What makes you think there?"

"Dwight had a routine, similar to where these bodies are being discovered.. When I was just a colt, I'll never forget it, his plan for robbing ponies in cities was to first hit at the entrance of where people came into the city. Secondly, he'd make his way to the East or West end of said city- whichever one he thought was more populated. Lastly, he'd go North and finish up getting what he wanted. Then, he'd make off with a greater risk job such as a heist in the center of the town. By now, he'd be working on the North- these disappearances didn't start long enough ago for him to already be planning on robbing in the actual center of the Empire itself."

Twilight can't help but smile as I explain this. "You're a genius, Cross. You might have just figured this out, once and for all!"

I shrugged sheepishly. "Aw come on, Twi. Don't celebrate just yet. We've got go to find what we had planned on finding, first. Dwight is our goal, we both know that much... But I also know we mutually have that feeling of not wanting to leave unless we find those missing ponies."

Twilight hugs me back, from earlier, and heads to her own room. "Thank you again, Cross. This means a lot to me, just as much as it probably does to my sister and Celestia."

Before I could say, "I know," Twilight had shut the door.

Twenty minutes later, Celestia knocks on my door and I hurriedly let her in.

"Dwight has a routine. He used to come to cities and start off by robbing people near the city entrance, which in this case is South-Southwest. After a victim or two is robbed he'll head either East or West, preferably which one he believes has a bigger population. Then, he goes North, robs until he's satisfied, and shortly after pulls off a big score in the center of town... Princess, when did these disappearances start occurring?"

I already knew the answer, but she didn't know that.

"About two or three weeks ago, I believe."

"Then he might still be murdering ponies to the North." I reassure her that he's definitely not been here long enough to already be thinking about a big score.

"Or, at the very least, luring ponies to the North. That's a very good place to start, then! Don't you think?"

I nod with a smile, "So long as I'm the first pony up there. Send me with a backup. Maybe Twilight?"

Celestia isn't so sure.

"You saw how she was earlier.."

"But I know she wants to help, and to help find these missing ponies. If you're still not convinced, then send us with a guard."

Celestia thinks on it for a moment, before exhaling a defeated sigh. "Alright, if it's what Twilight wants... I could send Ambrose Auricalchite with you. But I've had my suspicions about him since you mentioned how mister Callahan pays off ponies everywhere he goes. Keep an eye on him."

She leans down and gets in my face with a menacing glare.

"Twilight is like my daughter, and if something happens to her..." Celestia speaks with a growl to her tone, "I'll kill you myself."

I nod without a blink, and give her my word.
"I swear I'll do everything I can to keep her safe, Princess Celestia."

"Good." She says with a smile, stands up, and leaves.

I immediately got another shower to wash out the product in my mane, and went to bed.

"Good fucking luck to me." I whispered as I got comfortable, and soon after fell asleep.


Author's Note

He'll need it.

I hope everypony is enjoying the story so far, and is ready for an even further change in the amount of gore.
(Shocker! :pinkiegasp:)

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