The Best... Mao Face?

by Chemtest

Rating: teen
Tags: Profanity, Violence, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Death, Alternate Universe, Human, Main 6, Other, Original Character, Comedy, Cutie Mark Crusaders, Adventure, Princess Celestia, Crossover
Length: 4347

Too many worlds collide, and too many villians fight for best villain

Slendy, the sentinel of Equestria. Not to be confused with Slender, no, this is the Human we’re talking about, not him. Slendy, Slender, two differnt beings, just very similar bodies. Like, identical in every way.

But anywho, Slendy, the sentinel. Quite powerful, some might remark he’s too powerful for a fair fight. Well, there’s no time to be fair. Many beings of near equal power all attack at once. And it’s 4 v.s 10. Yeah, quite unfair.

All the while, something more ominous hangs in the background. And a squad must decide what side to take in the ensuing battles.

If your new, and what an idea of what’s going on, you need only read This, This, and This. Or you could try and unravel everything yourself without any idea what’s going on, wich I don’t recommend.

And for those who already know, make sure you read This first.

Published 2018-09-05 02:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-03-27 04:22:45 UTC

Meetings: Begin

I walk around the Everfree, late at night. There have been unusually strong magical residue around this area. Not to mention the scent of 096 and 049 that permeates the air. How I can smell them, I don’t know, but I’m glad I can. Those two I don’t worry about, it’s the unknown magical signatures I’m worried about.

A group that appeared in a clearing due west of here, a duo who’s signature was particularly dark to the north, many different signatures that spread out to towns around here, exactly where they went I can’t tell. One particularly large one in the far north, near where the Crystal Empire was. And the one I’m the most worried about.

A signature that was bright, not dark like the others. One that screamed ‘peaceful and not violent’ when I felt it. I don’t trust that, odds are it was something that was just really good at constructing these signatures. This is the one differnt from all the others, so it concerns me the most. That’s why I’m moving through the forest, I caught onto where the source of this is, and I’m moving towards it, fast.

I have a bad feeling about this, no matter if that’s cliche, it’s true. This burst of the signature right in the middle of night? Right in the middle of my most powerful? Now that just screams trap to me. No matter, I would be able to tear through any trap they have set. They’re foolish for showing their position, but clever for what their obvious plan is. It gives me a tiny modicum of respect for whomever did it.

Right up ahead, in this clearing. Let them come at me, I’m ready.

I rush to a stop in the middle of the clearing, and look around me, “Well, go ahead and set off your trap, I’m waiting.”

I hear a gasp from behind me, “Oh, Slendy, you actually spoke to a supposed victim! Wonderful progress we’ve made indeed!”

I spin around to see... something standing there. It looks kinda like me, but has a face, and a hat, and a suit with polka dots on it. And a red bow tie, instead of my beautiful black tie. I look right at it, “What the hell?”

The...man I think, sweeps me into a hug, “Oh, brother, you sound so confused!”

My mind rushes to catch up with what’s happening, and I dumbly respond, “What.”

He smiles, well, he smiles bigger, “Oh, I was so concerned when you disappeared like that! But, I found a way to find you!”

I say from the embrace, “I’m sorry, but I think you’ve got me confused for someone else.”

He let’s go of the embrace, and sniffs around me, “Huh, yeah, your scent is slightly different.” Then, I have a cane near my head, “What did you do to my brother?”

I reach out with one of my tentacles, and lower his cane, “I can call for him if you want.”

He looks directly into my face, “Then do it.”

I reach out telepathically.

Hey, Slender, there’s someone asking for you.

Is it urgent? I’m a bit busy.

Well, I don’t want to get hit with a cane, so yeah.

A cane? Oh... i’ll be over right away.

And like that, Slender appears, walking out of the woods, “Hello, brothers.”

The weird guy takes a sniff, and nods, “So, mind explaining this guy here, brother?”

Slender nods, “Me and him shared a body at one point until we were both given one of our own. He’s actually your brother as well, since he would technically be a part of the family.”

He looks towards me, “Well, I’m sorry.” He offers a hand, “I am Splendorman, pleasure to actually greet you!”

I shake his hand, “Just call me Slendy, and don’t worry, I forgive you.”

He smiles friendlily, and looks over at Slender, “So, still collecting fear?”

Slender rubs the back of his head awkwardly, “Well, no, not anymore. I do it a better way, to put it simply, and he introduced me to that path. Not to mention he introduced me to someone else as well, even if accidental.”

Splendor looks between us two, “Well I’ll be! You actually managed to get him to stop scaring and killing people! I’ve been trying to do that ever since he was born!” Then he looks closer at Slender’s face, “Did you polish your face!? My, I can guess why your acting so happy!”

I look between the two, “Does it have to do with him being busy?”

Slender sheepishly rubs the back of his head, “Well, I haven’t had the time to tell you. But, I’m becoming the Grim Reaper in a month!”

Oh, that’s what, “So, things with Death have been going good?”

Splendor hugs Slender out of happiness, “Oh, brother, you’re finnaly getting married! I’m going to be a brother in-law!” He then stares right into Slender’s face, and says, “Where was my invitation?”

Slender tries to pull his head back from Splendor, “Well, I was so busy, I didn’t have time.”

Splendor uses his hand, making the ‘i’m watching you’ sign, and then pulls away, “Okeydoky then!”

I chuckle to myself watching them. Three Eldritch Creaturss speaking about marriages. It’s so oddly humanizing, as it sounds like something I would hear back home. My old home, home no longer, I can’t go back.

They notice my chuckle, and Splendor skidaddles over to me, “What you chuckling at?”

I look around, “Well, here we are, three Eldritch near Gods, said to be able to comprehend everything and understand stuff that would drive mortals insane. And we’re talking about an upcoming marriage, talking about the most mundane things. Three immortals meet up in the woods in the middle of the night, and we talk about things the average pony would. It just struck me at how odd my life has become, now that normality is odd. To be honest, it reminds me of my old home.”

Splendor shudders when I mention home, “What happend to your home?”

I sigh, “There’s no known way to go back there from Equestia. I just wish some days that I could actually say goodbye to my family, my human family. And seeing my new family of you two acting so normal just brings up memories of back then.”

Splendor hugs me, “It’s fine to remember that, as long as you don’t dwell on the past, you shall live in the present. And you seem to be the protecter of this world, so you need to live in the present.”

I nod, “I know, I know.” I see the sun starting to rise in the distance, “Slender, go ahead back home, I can show Splendor around.”

Slender nods, “Good luck, he’s quite energetic.”

He dissapears, and I look at Splendor as he stops his embrace, “Well Splendor, let’s introduce you to the town of Ponyville.”

Splendor starts to smile, and clap his hands together quickly, “Oh boy, sounds fun!”

I nod, and start to walk towards town, “There’s my Proxies you should meet. And this one pony named Pinkie Pie, I have a feeling you’ll get along just fine.”

Say Hello, Town

Say Hello, Town

We get back to the town at the point most ponies are still setting up market stalls. Still quiet as of now, but getting louder every second. I smile towards Splendor, “Well, Splendy, this is Ponyville! My impromptu protectorate ever since I saved them.”

He looks around town, scratching his chin, “Quite a rustic feel around here, like a conglomeration of a Midevil German town and a Renaissance British hamlet. Very refreshing feel from the cold cities I’m used to.”

I smile internally, and start to show him around, “There’s the train station over there, makes me sick just looking at it.”

He nods, “I feel you, brother. Technology; helpful, but not healthy for us.”

I nod along with his words as I continue on, “There’s the schoolhouse, freshly painted as well! The reason for... I dont like to talk about.”

Splendor looks over at me with curiosity, “What could have happened to give the entire school a paint job?”

I shudder, “Remember how me and Slender shared a body? Well, the children’s fear was so great he was able to take control for a few seconds. He went crazy with marking the school.”

He shakes his head, “I should have a word with him.”

I hold up a hand, “No, there’s no need. He’s changed now, wouldn’t do that anymore.”

He nods afterwards, “Okay, if you don’t want me to, I-“ He cuts off suddenly as the school bell goes off.

I’m about to ask him what stopped him, then I feel it. A dark energy, a familiar one from the forest. Appearing, right there in the middle of the playground. I swivel my head over to see what’s there.

I can’t see anything, but I can see the foals gathering around the spot. Advanced perception alteration, a very clever tactic. I don’t know why children see so much others can’t, they just can. No perception alteration can hide from children, but it can hide from me. I say out towards Splendor, “Do you see anything?”

He shakes his head, “No, just the foals gathering around the dark point. I feel like something is there, I know something is there, I just can’t see it.”

I can feel the energy shift a bit, as if startled, pointing in our direction. All the foals look over towards us, probably wondering whatever entity their gathered around is startled by. I feel the energy shift again, and disappear. Probably teleported away.

The foals all sigh, and Apple Bloom walks over to me, “Hey there Mister Slenderman, who’s this with you?”

I nod towards Splendor, “This is my brother, Splendorman.”

He smiles, and kneels down to be on her level, “You wanna see a magic trick?”

She nods, “Sure!”

Splendor points out his cane, with the metal ball at the end, and turns it into flowers, “Tada, Magic!”

Bloom smiles, “I can do that too!” She sprouts flowers all around her.

Splendor looks at it in amazement, “Hey now, no need to make this a competition. Say, why don’t we play a game?”

She and Splendor walk back into the playground as she asks, “What game?”

I trail behind them, and hear Splendor say, “Hide and seek tag.”

She tilts her head, “Hide and seek, mixed with tag?”

He nods, “Don’t tell me you haven’t heard of that before!”

She shakes her head, “Nope, never heard of that.”

He gasps almost as if in pain, “Well, I’ll be. Next your going to tell me your class doesn’t know how to play Four Square!”

She shakes her head again, “Can’t say I’ve heard of that.”

Splendor recoils as if struck, “If you don’t know Four Square, then it is apparent the educational system has failed. Gather around everypony, it’s time you learned about the wonders of Four Square!”

The other foals go to gather around him. My orange Proxie decides to walk over to me instead. Scootaloo stops right in front of me, “Did you see that creep when we first came out?”

I shake my head, “Perception alternation was too strong for me or Splendor to see it.”

Scootaloo looks around, as if saying something controversial, “For some reason, everyone else in the class seems to instantly trust and become friends with him. They wouldn’t like it if they hear it, but I feel that ul- ul- bad intientions behind him. Something about him, and how they trust him just screams untrustworthy and evil to me.” She sighs, “Maybe I’m just making to many assumptions and there’s nothin wrong about him.”

I kneel down to be right in front of her, and start to whisper, “I know you’re correct. The perception alteration, the dark energy, him going away when he saw us, all of it tells me that somethings wrong here. What did he look like?”

She opens her mouth, then closes it, and rubs her hair sheepishly, “Well... I wasn’t exactly paying much attention. I can say he looks bad! But... that’s about all.”

I nod, and pat her head, “Don’t worry, just make sure you notice next time. Take notes or something, the sooner I can identify what he is, the better.”

She nods, and does a salute, “You can count on me, Slendy!”

I smile internally, “Good, I planed to.”

I stand back up, and look over at Splendor. He is right in his comfort zone, Laughing and dancing all the while teaching the children to play games. I walk over to see him teach one group, “Their are many rules. Number one; have fun, two, the ball must bounce in your Square before being hit, three, if there is any disagreements then you vote on it.”

I smile inside as I watch him teaching. One foal looks back at him, “So, you go into D, then into C, then B, then A? Why can D not be the server?”

Splendor holds up a finger, “I’ll explain it in a way you should understand, considering your mark is a card. A would be Ace, B would be King, C would be Queen, and D would be Jack, simple as that.”

The foal nods in understanding.

I feel someone tap on my leg, and look down to see Sweetie Belle there, “Yes?”

She smiles, “When you go meet my sister, take a camera. When my sister sees his suit, well, take pictures.”

I nod, “Will do.”

*Ring!*

The bell goes off, and the children go back inside. I’m about to walk over to Splendor, but a grey pegasus lands in front of me, “Are you Slenderman?”

I nod, “Yes, that would be me.”

She passes me a letter, “Mail.”

I take it, “Thank you.” And she flies off.

I unravel the note as Splendor comes over, “What does it say?”

I read it, “Somepony has been reporting ridiculous crimes for the past week, such as waking up with a kidney gone. Says I can look into the pony’s mental health if I want to.” I look over at him, “I don’t think that sounds so ridiculous.”

He nods, “So what shall we do?”

I nod, “We postpone the rest of the tour for later. We have a pony to ask questions and protect.”

Eye On The Prize

I look over at Splendor as we walk, “You know, this feels odd. Your arrival, all these dark smells on the wind, my arrival back. It feels like we’re in a giant chess game, and our enemy has us in check.”

He looks over at me, “What makes you think we’re surrounded?”

I take a deep smell of the air, “Scents of 096, 049, feelings of dark times approaching. Can’t you feel it? There’s a tension in the air, like someone’s made a great plan, and is worried about it failing.”

He calmly rests a tendril on my shoulder, “I think you’re overreacting. I think you’re mind is stressed, so it is seeing darkness where none exists.”

We step above a pony who gets in our path, “I know this isn’t just stress. One of my friends, Raven, taught me how to read mana. And the mana upon this world seems dark, all of a sudden. However, you might be right. Maybe my mind is just grasping at straws.”

He smiles, “Even if you’re right, there’s no need for us to worry. All that stress will cause terrible wrinkles upon your face, and we don’t want that, do we?” He motions forward with his cane, “Either way, we’re here.”

I look ahead, and see we’ve arrived at the secluded house on the outskirts of town. I look at Splendor, and nod, knocking on the door.

A pony hesitantly answers the door, peaking his head out, “Hello?”

I kneel down upon his level, “We’re here to ask questions about your reports to the guard.”

He nods, and fully opens his door, “Didn’t think you would show up. You must think this is awful serious if you’re here.”

I move in with Splendor following behind me. I duck as I enter, but soon stretch out in the big house. I nod, “Somepony missing a kidney is something to worry about. Regular guard might not be able to deal with this, maybe.”

He looks at Splendor, “Who’s this, your apprentice?”

Splendor looks at me, “Apprentice? You part of some big position, brother?”

I sigh, “I am head, and only member, of the Supernatural branch of the Equestrian Guard.”

The pony looks between us, “Well, I’m glad you two are catching up or whatever, but can we do this some other time? It’s getting close to night.”

I turn to face him, “Alright, to start off with, what’s your name?”

He smiles, “Kidney Bean.”

Splendor lets out a little laugh, causing the two of us to look back at him. He covers his mouth, “Oh, oh I am so sorry, the name mixed with the scenario was too much.”

Kidney looks back at me, “Anyway, I guess I should describe the events to you. About every night, soon after I fall asleep, I feel sharp pain on my body. I wake up, and only get to catch a single glimpse of some tall thing before it dissapears. One night, I didn’t wake up, and I found my kidney gone in the morning.”

I nod along, “Alright, I have a plan of action. You sleep, and I will watch over you.”

He blinks and yawns, “Well then, get ready. It’s about nine thirty, and it always prepares around ten.”

I nod, and turn to Splendor, “Alright, Splendy, I want you to watch the outside of the room. I’ve got the inside.”

Splendor nods, “No worries, brother, nothing will escape through the door.”

I move in the room after the pony, and I blend myself into the shadows in the corner of the room. I watch the pony fall asleep, and wait.

———

Out of nothing, something appears. Out of the shadows, there is a tall, human looking creature, standing at the foot of Kidney’s bed.

It goes to draw a knife from it’s side, only to stop as it feels my tendril on it’s shoulder. It slowly turns around to face me. A blue face, expressionless, eyes missing and bleeding darkness.

Eyeless Jack.

I wrap the tendril all around him, and toss him out the nearby window. I blink outside with him, only to see him roll back onto his feet.

He tilts his head as he sees me, “Slender? Shoud’ve guessed you’d be brought to this bizarre world as well. What, I intrude on your prey again?”

I stretch to my full hight, “Eyeless Jack. How odd for one so weak to pop up in this world.”

He angrily rips a kidney out of his pocket, and absorbs a bit of it, “Weak?! I know I can’t win against you, but I’m not weak!”

I shrug, “All you’ve got is teleportation and a knife. Forgive me if I’m not shaking in my metaphysical boots.”

He throws the kidney to the ground, and draws his knife, “These are the first words you’ve ever said to me, and it’s an insult?! I remember getting a few stabs on you last time, let’s increase that number!”

He tries to fake me out, by ripping a portal open behind him. He dissapears into it, and I follow him through. We both come out in the middle of a forest clearing, near the edge of the Everfree.

He turns around in surprise as I appear, “Wait, you’re seriously following me? Slender, what could I have done to make you so angry? I’ll choose another town to hunt if you want this one so much.”

I spread my tendrials out as much as I can, “You shall not harm any being here.”

His eyes widen a bit, “What’s gotten into you? We’ve always had a rocky relationship, yeah, but you’ve never claimed an entire town as your prey. Wait... you aren’t Slenderman, are you?” He shakes his head, “Should’ve seen it. You said my formal name, you actually spoke, protecting something.”

I nod, “You guess right.”

He turns to me once more, knife deep in his grasp, “Very well then. I shall have to rid this world of you. Some sort of impersonator, it’d never stand on my watch. I don’t think you even have powers, do you? Just some random thing that looks like Slender.”

He tries to approach, and I as well, but both of us are interrupted. The sound of something running through the brush of the forest drawing our attention. Until, all of a sudden, the noise stops. And the creature appears.

A boy, young looking, jumps out of a bush and towards Jack. He stabs a knife deep within Jack’s chest.

Normally, such a blow wouldn’t matter, but Jack starts to screech in pain. He tries to raise his own knife to block the newcomer, only to have his hand chopped off.

He grabs the new stump with his other hand, and tries running away. As soon as he takes his first step, the newcomer throws his knife.

It hit’s in the back of Jack’s head, causing him to fall over, dead. His black, tar-like blood staining the ground beneath him, and kidneys falling out of his pockets.

The newcomer pulls his knife out of Jacks head, and turns to face me.

Wide eyes, taking their first blink.

A smile to send shivers down anyone’s spine, turning into a sad frown.

Black hair draped on his head, now flowing in the nighttime wind.

Jeff the Killer.

Jeff stands before me, back from the dead.

Jeff

I stare in shock at Jeff, “How the hell are you back?”

We’re interrupted as Splendor teleports his way into the middle of the clearing. He looks over at me, before following my face to look at Jeff. As soon as his eyes meet Jeff’s face, something shifts inside of him. His expression washes off his face like dirt, leaving only his mouth, now in a tight frown. He holds his cane out to the side of him, causing it to segment into multiple pieces, “You! You’re presence infects this world! Jeff... it’s time we finish the last encounter we had.”

Jeff backs up a step, “No, wait!”

Splendor lashes out with his cane, showing it’s segements to be connected by cord to form a whip. It knocks Jeff right on the cheek, causing him to fall to the ground. Splendor brings the whip back again and again, and continues lashing Jeff relentlessly.

It’s only on the tenth lash that he hears the sobs, “I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m... so sorry.”

Hearing this, he snaps back to normalcy. His eyes return, conveying a sense of horror. He throws his cane to the side, and rushes to Jeff. He wraps him in a hug, patting him on the back, and rocking back and forth, “I’m so sorry, oh Creators, forgive me. I didn’t mean it, I didn’t mean it. Shhh, I can heal you, I can heal you.” Splendor summons up his energy, and a bright glow surrounds the two of them.

I stand there as they get up, “Alright, I need an explanation, and I need one now.”

Jeff turns towards me, his smile coming back, a lot less insane than earlier, “The demon known as The Killer has been... killed? Survivor, he freed me from him! Remember the Rake, how I killed it?”

I nod, “Yes, I remember. Still, do you have any proof of Survivor helping you?”

Jeff calmly draws his knife, and hands it to me, with blade pointed towards him. I take it, and look it around. He smiles, “Mithrel dagger, clean and well kept, unbreakable. Survivor gave it to me as a gift.”

I nod as I inspect it, and hand it back to him, “Very well. That, along with the fact you haven’t stabbed me yet, will make me trust you.”

He smiles, and is about to speak, when we’re interrupted once again.

Men in dark armor pop up out of the bushes around us, guns leveled in out direction. One of them speaks, “Corporal, they’ve got a bot with them. Looks to be a teenager, possibly twenty. Private John and Corey, extract the body from the edge.”

I calmly put my hands in the air, and motion Splendor and Jeff to do the same. I turn to face the men, “You aren’t from around here, are you?”

They don’t move at all, allowing one of them in a lab coat to walk up, “My name is Doctor Spark, might I know your names?”

The leader of the troopers move forward, “Doctor, you will get back from them immediately.”

He turns to the troop, “I will do no such thing. We are in a place we know nothing about, we need help.” He turns back to me, “Now, without the intrusive nature of my colleague. What are your names?”

I slowly lowered my hand, “I am Slenderman, that is Splendorman, and he is Jeffrey Woods.”

The leader of the troops now moves in front of the Doctor, “You will move back now, Doctor! Jeffrey Woods is a known killer!”

Spark puts his hand on the troops shoulder, “Corporal Johnson, you will stop interfering. We are in a different world, this is not the same person. You will move back, and allow me to converse with Mister Slenderman.”

I interrupt them, “If you wish, I can bring you to Princess Celestia. She will be sure to meet you with open hooves.”

Splendor nods, “Come on, and I’m sure we can find a way for you to make it back to Earth.”

Spark motions to the soldiers to stand down, and he smiles at us, “We’d be glad to accept the hospitality of your ruler.”