Smolder was flying along the halls of the School of Friendship, minding her own business, when she noticed a peculiar sight. There was a pony with a brown coat and an orange mane walking along the hall with a strange contraption attached to his head, covering his eyes.
“What is that?” Smolder asked the pony, utterly baffled,.
“Ponysonite VR Headset Model 13 with special volume controls and a special sword with double razor blade with kill speed 4 to 9.” The pony wildly gestured with the plastic stick in his hoof.
Smolder looked at the pony for a second, registering what she had just heard. “VR? 4 to 9?”
It took the pony a moment to answer, as he was busy pressing buttons on the side of the contraption. “Where have you been, the Dragon Lands?” he asked sarcastically. “I’ve heard they don’t even have arcades.”
“I have been in the Dragon Lands,” Smolder said, more than a tad annoyed now. “Where have you been, an alternate universe?”
“Yeah.” The pony swung his stick. “Aah! Zombies! Go, I’ll hold them off! Remember me!”
“Thats it!” Smolder told the pony and yanked the headset off the pony’s head. “What is this thing?”
The pony made a snatch at it, but Smolder flew out of reach. “I already told you, its a Po—”
“What does it do?” Smolder shouted in frustration. This pony was infuriating, with his obnoxious voice and nonsensical talk.
“It shows you zombies!” the pony leapt in the air, trying to reach it again, and fell flat on his face. He began to sob. “Its too late! The kingdom defenses have been breached. Its just a matter of time before they reach the palace of Faust and steal the Stone of Ingram so that they can take over the Shrine of Friendship and then they’ll all be level 34 and the world will fall! I’ve failed already!”
Smolder raised an eyebrow. “I think you’ve lost your mind.” she turned the contraption over in her claws. “How do you use this thing?”
The pony looked up. “I’ll show you, but you’ll have to do exactly what I say, because if the zombies breach the defenses we will all be dooooooooooomed!!!!!” he looked at Smolder. “Gimme.”
Smolder stared at him. “Who are you?”
The pony glared at her. “Button Mash. Gimme!” Smolder handed over the headset. Button Mash pulled the headset over Smolder’s eyes. She found herself looking at a crowd of green ponies. She yelped. She looked down and found she had armored hooves. Not claws, hooves. What was this thing? “Okay,” Button Mash continued, “just hold the sword like this…”
*************
Sandbar was sitting at his desk in Professor Applejack’s class when Smolder came in with a VR headset on her head and a stick in her claws. She was swinging wildly with the stick, and yelling random phrases.
“Take that! Brain Crunch! Yes! Level 20! No! Down to two hearts!”
Sandbar stared in utter confusion as another pony crashed into the doorframe and then came in, also with a VR and a stick. He swung the stick, hitting Yona in the back of the head.
“Pony crazy!” She exclaimed.
Sandbar vaguely recognized the pony. He had been sent to Starlight’s office several times for playing video games in class. What was his name? Button Shirt? Button Makeover? It had been the latter, he decided, just before Button Makeover’s stick hit him in the side of the head.
“Ow!” he exclaimed. “Smolder, what is going on?”
“I’m playing some dumb—what was it called? A video game? Level 21! Wave 5 down! This is so awesome!”
“Word,” Button Makeover commented.
Sandbar rolled his eyes. Okay, actually rolled his eyes into the back of his head. He had been hit very hard.
Applejack arrived at that moment, just as Smolder’s stick broke the desk. She galloped in. “What in the hay is—” she began, but stopped when she was hit in the legs and fell over, moaning in pain. Ocellus ran toward the doorway but Button blocked the door.
“No! I have worked too hard to protect Queen Megan! You will not get to her before she finishes the spell of Villain Redemption! Yes! Kill! Kill! Kill!” Ocellus turned into a chipmunk to avoid the the stick and ran back toward the class. She hid under Applejack’s hat.
Gallus stood. “Thats it, I’m taking them down!” He charged Smolder, planning to rip the VR Headset off her head. He ran right into the wall as Smolder spun to the side. Gallus walked around in a daze, and then tripped over Applejack.
“They’re out of control!” Ocellus squeaked.
“What are those things?” Silverstream asked excitedly. “Can I try one?”
“Mine!” Button Mash screamed and rushed Silverstream. Silverstream pulled out a pirate sword and met the stick with it. “No!” Button screamed. “This zombie is a one of a kind challenge resulting of five misses!”
Silverstream laughed as they dueled. “This is fun!”
“No, its a life or death situation!” Smolder yelled, smashing through the wall between theirs and Fluttershy’s classroom. Fluttershy huddled under the desk, shaking in fright.
Button hit Silverstream in the face just then. Silverstream stopped and stared down Button. “Oh it is on,” she growled. “War!”
Button glared too, though you couldn’t see it. “Lets go.” They both charged each other. The battle lasted approximately one minute. Then they both took a break. And resumed. After an hour Sliverstream stomped her foot.
“This is it! Time for the big guns.” She pulled out a large bomb, lit the fuse, and flew through a window. She hid in a tree then came out to see the School of Friendship gone. She smiled and flew to where the students and teachers were standing outside the remains. She grinned at Button Mash.
“I win! Wasn’t that fun? It was so fun! Can we do it again?” Silverstream asked in a rush.
Starlight looked at her strangely. “I think we have to have a talk where I teach you some moral about friendship or something. Come with me to—well I don't have an office anymore, so, uh, lets go to Sugar Cube Corner.”
Silverstream squealed. “I love Sugar Cube Corner!”
Starlight grimaced. Sometimes her job made her want to quit and go back to being a villain.
*************
Silverstream had been taught her lesson, but she sure hadn't learned it. Now she was carefully removing the window pane from the window of Button Mash’s room. She tiptoed carefully through the room, miraculously not stepping on anything. And there, lying on Button’s nightstand, was the VR headset and stick. She grabbed them and, laughing evilly, disappeared into the night.
