What Happens in the Background

by An Intricate Disguise

Rating: mature
Tags: Sex, Human, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Starlight Glimmer, Romance, Original Character, Comedy
Length: 2937

Two humans—a master spellcaster and his inexperienced apprentice—come to Equestria to warn of impending doom. The human apprentice is soon distracted from the very important plot by a beautiful unicorn, Princess Twilight's own apprentice.

Two humans—a master spellcaster and his inexperienced apprentice—come to Equestria to warn of impending doom. The master is fearsome and powerful, and the danger he speaks of is great, but this is not his story.

It is, however, the story of two apprentices, and how they manage to find one another amongst the chaos and damn the plot to hell. They'll also have sex a lot.

A love story between two 'minor characters', because why should the heroes get all of the screen time? The sex won't be happening instantly, but expect plenty in later chapters!

Cover art by the awesome and talented Mercurial⁶⁴, feel free to check them out!

Published 2018-09-07 19:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2018-09-07 19:50:01 UTC

A Very Important Beginning

Peldric shielded his eyes from the violent luminescence of the portal forming in front of him. "You're—" he had to raise his voice to compete with the whistle of magic. "You're sure this is safe to travel through, master?"

He looked to his right, and there Goldron was, channelling the spell necessary to make the portal work. He took his eyes off of the spell, raising a brow at his apprentice. "You dare question me, boy?" He smirked, taking one hand away from the portal he was building and still managing to maintain it. "I was building interdimensional portals that defy time and space while you were still suckling on your mother's bosom, and you'd do well to remember that!"

Peldric tried to ignore the rather unpleasant image of breastfeeding, nodding in a haste. "Yes, master, I'm sorry, it's just we don't usually go this far this quickly!" It was true, too. Dimension hopping might not have been new to either of the pair, but they usually had much longer to prepare for it.

"Not all emergencies give time for forethought, boy. Especially those that occur in a split second. That's why they're called 'emergencies'." Goldron shook his head, likely muttering something about Peldric's ignorance and inexperience as he finished off the portal. "The Devourer is coming for this world whether we like it or not, and we do not have the magic here to repel his assault. That is why we're travelling to a new land, and that is why we haven't time to make a less crude portal. Besides, for all of your complaining, I see you doing little to help."

At this, Peldric perked up in slight disbelief. "You want me to help you maintain the portal, master?" His voice was hopeful, it would be the first bit of proper magic work he'd done in weeks.

"What?" Goldron replied as if he was mad. "Gods, no, I want you to take your notebook and document how I looked as I erected this glorious feat of magic. Try and capture my poise, the way my beard sways, the billowing of my robes, and the power coursing through my hands. Perhaps make a sketch, too—boy, are you listening?"

"Yes, master." Well, that was no shock. The idea that Goldron would actually let him do anything of significance was as wishful thinking now as it might've been two years ago when he first became his apprentice. Taking out his notebook—which just so happened to be half-filled with recountings of his master's exploits—he set to work on documenting exactly how amazing and powerful Goldron looked as he created the portal, the multi-hued balls of ethereal energy coursing through the air and congealing around one place in the centre of the field.

And he did look astounding. Irritatingly so. Part of Peldric was tempted to just draw a big cock casting the spell on the paper, it wasn't like Goldron ever bothered to check his work anyway.

But no, even when he was given the most menial of tasks, he tried to take them seriously. By the time he had finished writing down just how great Goldron was in every way relevant to this situation, the spell was finally formed, and he stood with a triumphant smirk. "There, boy. You just witnessed premier spellcasting. Perhaps you'll learn from it."

"I mean, you could just, you know, teach me the spell." Peldric might have taken a bit of a tone there, he couldn't help it.

"Bah! Ludicrous!" Goldron snapped as if he'd just tried to tell him that the earth was made of elephants. "Do you think you'll ever understand the secrets of the universe if they're all laid out for you? You have to learn for yourself, boy, I can only teach so much. I didn't become Goldron the Wise and Magnificent by asking other masters to teach me their ways, I innovated!"

"Didn't you pick that title yourself?" Peldric replied, head tilted.

"Yes, but only when I was ready!" Goldron explained to him like he was an imbecile, which he likely thought he was.

"Then maybe you should let me practice my magic more?"

Goldron leaned down at him, eyebrows knitted. "You are not ready. Enough time wasting, in the portal we hop." With that, Goldron jumped inside without warning, and Peldric followed suit before the thing could close, sighing all the way.

As always, Goldron pleasantly drifted to a standing position after teleportation, dusting off his robes and casting curious, beady eyes about his surroundings.

As always, Peldric fell roughly ten feet and bruised something. His coccyx, this time. "Ouch ouch ouch ouch ouchhh." Peldric jumped up, hoping the movement would reduce the pain, but it only made it worse.

"I've told you so many times, boy, you have to balance on the air, or you will fall!" Goldron shook his head disapprovingly, which seemed to be the only way he ever shook his head.

"...what does that even mean?" Peldric growled through the pain, which was slowly beginning to recede. The only time Goldron ever did see to give advice, it was in riddles that only he could understand.

"You see? And this is why you are not ready. A master magician would have understood me instantly."

Peldric began to rub at his eyes, weathering a sigh. "Whatever. Can you just tell me where we're going?"

"Shouldn't it be obvious?" Goldron pointed into the distance, his finger travelling in the direction of a moderately sized village. "We're going to the castle made entirely of crystal which also happens to conspicuously be the largest building for miles." Goldron turned to him with a quizzical expression. "Where did you think we were going, the bakery?"

Yeah, alright, maybe a bit of stupid question. No need to rub it in. Silently, the two of them began to walk, and Peldric took in as many of his surroundings as he could. He'd been to enough worlds before that some of the novelty of different civilisations and landscapes had worn off, but this place was rather pretty, despite the far off buildings looking a tad small.

It didn't take him long to catch sight of a few of the occupants, and he squinted to be sure he was seeing right. "I've never seen horses of those colours before... nor so small. Do the people of this earth breed them?"

"Foolish boy... the horses are the people of this earth. Unicorns, pegasi, and even alicorns, all as intelligent as man, ruling an entire nation."

"But if that's the case, what do they ride when they need transport? Each other?" Peldric smirked a little at his own words. Look at him, asking the important questions.

"I imagine that being horses, their legs take them much further than ours do." Goldron answered with a stroke of his beard, something he did much too often, as if he was trying to remind everyone that it was there.

Their walk took them closer quickly, and before long, citizens of the town were looking at them both, chatting amongst one another. They seemed curious, but not shocked, and the closer Peldric got, the more he started to see just how well groomed and maintained these ponies were. In a way, they resembled the ones he'd seen before very little. They were more fair in their features, more beauteous.

They were also about half as tall as Peldric, perfect waist height. He banked that knowledge, wondering if it would come in handy again later.

Of course, Goldron was the one that the ponies stared at most. And why wouldn't they? He had a stronger presence, he walked with a commanding gait, and his robes were more magnificent. Peldric stooped more, despite being six feet tall, and his short blackened beard and curly locks were nothing compared to Goldron's pure white, long and brushed magnificence. Needless to say, he often wasn't the centre of attention when his master was around. Hell, his master hardly even noticed he was there half the time, he was almost sure.

When they arrived at the castle, Goldron knocked. A small congregation of ponies had gathered around the outside with them, scrutinising each of them in turn and whispering excitedly. Peldric could feel his heart beating a little faster than usual—it was always nice to feel noticed. He smiled at them. A few smiled back, and it made him happy to see.

Goldron paid them no attention whatsoever. It was almost as if they weren't worth his time, and only his goals were. In fact, knowing Goldron for two years, Peldric would say that summed him up to a tee. The door soon opened, and on the other side was a small drake, his eyes bugging as soon as he bore witness to the pair of them.

"Wh-whoa!" he stammered, falling back a little from the door. "I've... never seen creatures like you before! Did you come to see the princess? Does she know you're coming?"

Goldron was the one to answer. "She does not, and I'm afraid tidings are dark indeed. The Devourer plans to move on this world soon, and only my magic and that of the alicorns combined can keep him and his minions at bay. I must see her at once."

"Oh! Err, okay!" Curious that this drake reacted so little to an 'end of the world' scenario. Were they that common here? "Well if you'll just come this way, mister..." he beckoned with his hand.

"Goldron. Goldron the Magnificent and Wise."

"Hah, Trixie'll like you." His stubby feet plodded along the crystalline floors, his tail tapping behind him. "And you? Do you need to see Twilight as well?"

"He is my apprentice." Goldron answered as if Peldric wasn't there. "He may attend if he wishes. It might do him some good to witness the workings of two master magicians."

Peldric was sure that the drake saw his mimicking of Goldron's words, because he smirked for a moment. "That's no problem! I'm pretty sure Twilight's with her apprentice at the moment, too, Starlight Glimmer, so there'll be two of you there!"

That instantly got Peldric's attention. Someone else who shared in this torture? Suddenly, thoughts about the world ending and catastrophe went out of the window, his only thought the idea of someone he could vent his frustrations to, that understood the absolute degrading monotony of being an apprentice to someone who thought they were perfect in every way.

He might have walked a little faster than usual after that, though he was sure no one noticed a difference.

"By the way," the drake said, turning to the two of them. "I'm Spike. Spike the Brave and Glorious."

"Ah, you have a title," Goldron said, nodding in approval. "You must be worthy of speaking to."

Peldric really hated Goldron sometimes. He almost wanted to snap something to the tune of 'well, I'll bet he didn't pick his himself', but he really didn't feel like getting in his master's bad graces right then, it might rob him of his opportunity to speak to the enigmatic Starlight.

Spike finally led them both to a grand wooden door, opening it and leading them inside. On the other side was a vast library, stacked with tons upon tons of books written in a language that looked similar to Peldric's peoples' writings, but different all the same. It was curious, and his eyes traced the various runes and glyphs on display as he walked, until his eyes finally settled on the table in the centre of the room.

There were two ponies, though one of them was an alicorn. She had wings and a horn, as they were depicted in the books he'd read, though the other held far more interest to him.

It was the unicorn struggling to maintain a cloaking spell that had his attention. Invisibility was advanced magic, and this unicorn looked as if she was already most of the way there, her features obscured by the chameleon effects of the magic, only making Peldric wonder more as to what she looked like. She was lucky, her master actually let her practice magic of significance.

Though her spell soon dropped as she noticed the pair of them behind Spike, Twilight gasping and charging her horn. Spike waved his hands at them before anything crazy could occur. "No no, don't worry, guys, they're friendly. This is Goldron the Magnificent and Wise, and, uhh..."

"And his apprentice," Goldron answered for him.

"Right! Anyways, apparently some really bad stuff is happening, something about a 'devourer' or something, and I'll just let them tell you the rest."

This caught Twilight's attention, her ears perking, though Peldric's was stolen by the quickly appearing features of Starlight. Her mane was incredibly eye capturing, he loved the way it swayed and still managed to remain in place as she turned her head. Her coat was light and fluffy, her horn almost majestic, and she had a strange brand on her flanks that he couldn't quite comprehend. Needless to say, she was quite the oddity, and a splendid one at that.

And she was looking at him too, it seemed. Her eyes seemed to travel up and down him a couple of times, purple things that could never stay in one place, and he could swear that at one moment, she bit her lip. Peldric wasn't used to being paid any attention to, especially when Goldron was in the room. He reached up to rub at the back of his neck, wondering what had her so curious.

By the time he remembered there were in fact other people in the room, and that very serious matters were being discussed, Goldron had finally finished explaining everything anyone would need to know about the Devourer, and Peldric hadn't listened to a single word of it.

"Time is of the essence," he concluded. "If we are to halt the demon's march, we must begin planning immediately. I wish to have a search for the artifacts scheduled within the next two days."

"This is a lot to take in," Twilight replied, her breath short, "but we'll be sure to help in any way we can. If what you said is true, then I understand why you sought me out. For formal introductions, I'm Twilight Sparkle, Princess of Friendship, and this is my apprentice, Starlight Glimmer."

"Hah, you use your apprentice's name? What an oddity. Yes, they can stand in the corner and watch as we make our plans, perhaps fetch us a tea."

"Actually, that's kinda my job," Spike perked up.

"Nonsense, you have a title!" Goldron chuckled, patting him on the head. "Only nameless, ignorant apprentices are fit to brew my tea, so we'll leave that task to the boy, and your 'Starlight'." He actually did the airquotes as he said it, too. He was that much of a condescending prick.

And Starlight definitely noticed if how she was gritting her teeth was any indication. Peldric flashed her an apologetic look, and she appeared to calm somewhat.

"Boy, why are you still here?! Your master wants his tea, and with no delay!"

At this, Starlight perked up. "Here, I'll come with you. I'll tell you how Princess Twilight likes it made." She tugged his hand with her magic, and before long, they were outside the library again, alone and without their masters.

And she had a girlish smile on her lips. She seemed to peer at him oddly once more, and Peldric blushed as he felt himself doing the same. "Bit of a piece of work, your master, huh?"

"By the earth, you have no idea. If I have to write one more account of his astonishing magical feats, I swear I'm going to choke him to death."

She giggled in a light titter, her bangs bouncing a little. She was actually laughing at something he said! It felt great to be acknowledged, if only for a moment, like something he'd dearly missed for months, years now. "Well, how about we get a little lost on the way to the kitchen?" She bumped her flank against him, flashing him a wink, and instantly, he felt confusion.

"You... are you implying—" He cut himself off. No, she couldn't have been, that would be incredibly forward. Peldric could feel himself beginning to sweat at the prospect, would he even want to do something like that with a talking pony?

"Implying that we shouldn't have to deal with him again for a while? Hell yeah. How about a tour of the castle instead? It's pretty great here, I still get lost sometimes, and I've lived here for years now."

Peldric released a breath of relief, instantly feeling less nervous and sweaty. She'd only meant truanting the meeting for a while, not... that. But now, like it or not, that was in his head. He nodded, not feeling as if words would serve him well right then.

"Great! I'll lead the way then..." She began to walk, and Peldric followed after with a tense body, attempting not to let his eyes settle on any part of her for too long, especially not the tight, firm rump she sported.

Perhaps this would be the best castle tour he'd ever had, and there had been a good few. Not for the place itself, of course, but for the guide. Part of Peldric realised that he should have been taking an interest in all of the relevant, interesting and important details occurring in the meeting nearby...

...but the rest of him really didn't care.