“Thanks a bunch, Mrs. Cake!” Pinkie Pie stepped out of Sugar Cube Corner, two fresh mugs of hot cocoa lightly scalding the tips of her fingers. She sat down next to Sunset, who was fidgeting uncomfortably to keep the cold metal chair from touching the insides of her bare legs.
“Are you sure you want to sit out here, Pinkie?” she asked. “It'd be so much warmer inside.”
“I'm sure.” Pinkie surveyed the wrapped-up crowds crossing the street beside them. Pinkie, always the extrovert, gained strength from having people around her, enjoying the space nearby her. Sugar Cube Corner was empty at the moment, but also private, secluded. If this conversation went unexpectedly south, Pinkie thought, she'd like an easy chance to escape into the crowd.
She sighed, and Sunset perked up in her seat. “There! I knew there was something wrong. You've been gloomier than usual, Pinkie.”
“I'm not allowed to be a little down now and then?” Pinkie asked.
“You're Pinkie Pie!” Sunset replied. “I didn't know 'sad' was in your vocabulary!” She laughed to herself, short and hollow. She continued, “But more importantly, things have been like this for a while, to the point that the girls and I are starting to worry a little.” Sunset laid her hands down on the table, resting lightly on top of Pinkie’s. “You do so much to lift our spirits every day; surely we can return the favor.”
Pinkie blushed and pulled her hands away. “It’s… it’s not that simple. I’ve been thinking a lot about the future, where we’ll all be in just a year or two.”
“Oh?” Sunset leaned back in her chair, her sleeve resting on the chair’s back. “You know, I haven’t thought about it much myself. Ever since my plans to conquer Equestria were defeated, I’ve mostly focused on learning to be a better friend with all of you.”
“You don’t have to think about it, Sunny,” said Pinkie. “You’re so smart, you can do anything you want!” Pinkie paused for a moment, then relaxed. “So what do you wanna do with your future? I’m expecting nothing less than president!”
Sunset smiled and laughed at Pinkie’s huge grin. “I may just have to do that! I’ll have to balance my time between running the world and doing experiments in particle physics.” Sunset paused as a thought crossed her mind. “You could probably beat me to the presidency, though; nopony can say no to you. Is that what you’re aiming for?”
Pinkie frowned. “We’ll get back to me. I’ve also been thinking about everyone else, too. Rainbow Dash has been applying for sports scholarships; Whinnypeg is gonna offer her a great deal. She’s not gonna stop until she’s the best player on the team!”
“Well, that’s Rainbow for you. The girl doesn’t stop for anything.”
“And Rarity. Hoo boy, Rarity! If you’d told me a year ago that a 16-year-old girl could start her own fashion company and have it hit top five before her 18th birthday, I would have thought you were loco! But she knows what she wants--”
“And she won’t hear a word against her. She’s still got a year to go, but I don’t doubt she’ll pull it off.”
“Applejack’s family business is blowing up. She’s doing so well for herself--”
“Right, right.” Sunset nodded. “Fluttershy’s obvious, too—she’s been talking about getting her degree in veterinary sciences ever since she started helping with that shelter. And Twilight--” Sunset gave a soft, warm smile “--Twilight’s going to change the world. No doubt about it.”
“No doubt about it.” Pinkie sighed and ran a finger around the edge of her mug. “But then I think about what I’m going to do after we graduate, and I just… don’t know, Sunset. I just don’t know.”
“What’s the problem?” Sunset asked, frowning. “I’ve seen your grades—they’re more than fine. Or heck, if you wanted to open up your own party store, or be a clown at kid’s birthday parties, I don’t doubt you could pull it off. We’d be with you all the way to succeed!”
“But those aren’t… they’re not real jobs, are they? They’re not very secure.”
“Pfeh. ‘Secure.’” Sunset brushed the idea away. “Do it because it makes you happy. Besides, when you’re really good at something, life has a way of rewarding you for it.”
“Heh. I guess so.” Pinkie gave a wan smile.
“Your style’s not to plan ahead. You’re more the kind to jump in feet-first into everything, and you always come out on top. So… we good?”
Pinkie gave a short laugh. “Yeah, we good.”
“Good, now let’s--” A short chime began to play. Sunset jolted up in her seat and fumbled in her pockets. “Just a sec, Pinkie.” From her pocket, she retrieved her phone, buzzing and displaying Twilight’s face. Sliding the button to answer it, she said, “Hey, beautiful.”
Pinkie couldn’t hear the other side of the conversation; what she could hear was Sunset laughing, or replying, “I can’t believe it!” She wished she knew what Twilight was saying, to feel that same bond of a relationship they had. Whenever Sunset called Twilight by one of her many pet names, a storm of conflicting emotions raced through her. Sadness, longing, jealousy, anger, desire…
Sunset was looking at her funny, and she’d stopped laughing at Twilight’s remarks. “Twi, I’m gonna have to call you back,” she said. Then, she hung up the call and set the phone face-down on the table.
“...What?” Pinkie said, playing innocent. “I didn’t say anything.”
“There’s more, isn’t there.” Pinkie wasn’t sure if Sunset had meant that as a question or a statement, but her face made it plain: she bore the look, not of a disappointed parental figure, but of a detective uncovering more of the crime.
“I...” Suddenly, Pinkie’s mouth was dry. She mimed drinking from her cup, which had been dry for a while now. “Hold on, I’m just gonna--”
“C’mon, Pinkie. Don’t stall me out here. There’s something you’re not telling me.”
Pinkie sighed. “All right, you got me. I’m not just worried about finding a job.”
Sunset didn’t respond. After a moment, she asked, “Well?”
“Oh! It’s… well, I’m also…” She sighed, a hint of a tear threatening to break free behind her eye. “Sunset, do you think… someone would ever love me?”
Sunset relaxed in her seat. “Oh, Pinkie...” she said, smiling.
“N-now, hold on, Sunset! Because I know I’m… different. Most other people find me difficult to work with. It’s like, with the job thing… I don’t know what I have to offer.”
“Pinkie, when you’re in a relationship, the only thing that matters is that you care about the other person. And you show time and again that you care deeply about everyone you come across. Someone out there is going to match your wavelength, and you’ll just know.” Instinctively, her eyes drifted to the phone resting on the table, to look at a minute ago.
Pinkie hummed in response, a non-committal answer. She began to half-sing a song under her breath, which she hoped Sunset wouldn’t recognize. “The wonderful thing about Pinkies, is Pinkies are wonderful things.”
“Is that…?” Sunset followed along, humming as Pinkie continued the lyrics. When they hit the last lines, Sunset suddenly realized what had inspired Pinkie’s thoughts in that direction. “’But the most wonderful thing about Pinkies is that I’m the only one?’ Don’t think that, girl!” Sunset shook her head. “Who rejected you?”
Pinkie jolted up. “What?! Why would you--”
“The only way you’d be this down on yourself is if someone told you they didn’t value you. So spill it. Whose face do I have to bash in for breaking your heart?” She punctuated this with a dramatic cracking of her knuckles, her face in an ironic leer.
“No! You can’t!” Pinkie stood up from her chair and waved back and forth in an X motion. “It’s not anyone’s fault, because I… I didn’t ask her.”
“Ah.” Sunset waited while Pinkie sat back down, ignoring the stares from everyone else walking by the cafe. “So why didn’t you ask her? Do you know if she likes girls too?”
Pinkie didn’t say anything for a moment. “I’m pretty sure, yeah,” she finally replied.
“Then what’s the problem? And don’t tell me you weren’t good enough for her, because we both know that’s a lie.”
“No, it’s not that. I was just… scared, Sunset. I was scared of her rejecting me, but by the time I’d mustered up my courage, I… missed my chance.”
Sunset grew quiet. She twirled her cup on one point, staring at it fixatedly. “Tell me what she’s like,” she said, finally.
“What?”
“Your crush,” Sunset said. “I want to know what’s she’s like.”
“Well...” Pinkie said. “She’s beautiful, and smart, and she cares for all of us in her own way, and even though she’s made mistakes in her past, she keeps trying to...”
Pinkie cut off, as Sunset was now laughing her head off, her breath quick white puffs, and placing both hands in front of her face. “What’s so funny?!” Pinkie asked.
Sunset calmed down, though she still chuckled quietly to herself as she said, “I’m sorry. I’m not laughing at your confession; I’m laughing at myself, that I thought it would work.”
“Thought what would work?” Pinkie asked, a chill running down her spine.
“Pinkie...” Sunset relaxed and reached forward slightly. “I know.”
“K-know what?”
“The girl you’re in love with. I know who it is. Well, I’ve pretty much narrowed it down. And I know why you don’t want to tell me.”
Sunset paused. “It’s either me or Twilight, isn’t it?” Pinkie didn’t say anything, but she must have had a shocked look on her face, because Sunset took it as a “yes” and continued. “I mean, I had an inkling before we started talking. This started around the time Twilight and I started dating, and I figured either you had a crush on one of us, or you were jealous of our relationship and wanted to be in one of your own. So I asked you to describe your crush to me, thinking you’d reveal whether it was me or her, but of course, you managed to describe your crush in such a way that sounds equally like both of us!” Sunset scoffed and shook her head. “So that’s why I was laughing.
“And of course, I understand why you’d be worried about telling me that. If it’s me, you don’t want me to reject you—or worse, accept your feelings, then be pulled between you and Twilight. And if it’s Twilight, you don’t want me to get jealous, or hate you for what you feel.” Here, Sunset smiled beatifically. “But Pinkie, I say this with the utmost sincerity: no matter which is the case, I would never do anything to hurt you. So long as both of us—all three of us—are honest and kind, we can make this work. You don’t have to hide yourself away in pain anymore. Okay?”
Pinkie sniffled, and only then did she realize she was quietly crying. All of the heartbreak she’d been keeping tucked away… it could all be gone in an instant. She could feel the words forming on the inside of her throat, ready to come out.
But… Sunset was wrong. That wasn’t why she was afraid to tell her the truth. She was afraid that saying the words would make her feelings real, and she didn’t know if she could accept them then. If her feelings were reciprocated, she would be breaking up a happy relationship; if they were not, then she’d brought her feelings into the foreground, only to have them dashed into oblivion. To admit what she felt was to accept that she’d fallen in love with a taken woman… and there was no happiness coming out of that.
So rather than respond to Sunset, she shook her head and turned away.
Sunset froze for a moment. Her posture became false, more strained, as she processed Pinkie’s rejection. She tried again: “Pinkie, you don’t have to do this. I already know. I just want to make clear whether it’s me or Twilight you’re in love with, so I can figure out which strategy we’re going with, moving forward.” Pinkie didn’t respond. “There’s no wrong answer here. Neither answer means we’re not friends anymore. We both still care for you, Pinkie, and we both want to help you. So if you just tell me who you’re in love with...”
Nothing. Sunset’s hands dropped onto the cold table, and she sighed. “I am right about it being one of the two of us, right?” Silence. “You’ve as good as told me, Pinkie! I just want to clear the air between us.”
Pinkie didn’t dare say a word. Sunset tried one last tactic. “Pinkie. Look up at me, please.” Against her better judgment, she looked up. “Is it me? Or is it Twilight?” Sunset watched Pinkie’s face closely for any minuscule, involuntary signs that might reveal the answer. But either because Pinkie was crying, or because she had resolved not to let Sunset know the truth, no answer came, and Sunset leaned back in her chair, defeated. “All right, I give up. I’ll talk this over with Twilight and the rest of the girls, and maybe we can come up with something.” She stood up and brushed down her skirt. On a whim, she added, “And no, even though you won’t tell me, even that doesn’t mean we’re not friends anymore, okay?”
Pinkie nodded pitifully. Sunset sighed. “All right, I’m heading into town. Twilight’s waiting at the mall for me. You can come with if you want, but...” Pinkie shook her head. “Yeah, I kinda figured. See you tomorrow, then.”
Pinkie couldn’t even say goodbye. Sunset walked past her, but just before she melted into the crowd, she stopped and placed one hand on the back of Pinkie’s chair. She whispered, as soft as cloud, “If it’s our relationship that’s hurting you, I’ll break up with Twilight if that will make things better. I care about Twilight, but I care about you as well, and I can accept being just friends with her right now for the sake of my friends’ happiness. Would that help?”
Hoarsely, through her tears, Pinkie whispered back, “S-sunset… that’s the last thing I want.”
“All right.” She finally left for good, leaving Pinkie curled up in her seat, quietly freezing alone.
