"Yaks Have Concerns"

by Coyotek4

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Yaks, Twilight Sparkle, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 1293

Prince Rutherford has a meeting to discuss the treatment Yona has been given so far this school year.

News of Yona's experiences at Twilight's School of Friendship prompts Prince Rutherford of Yakyakistan to meet with the headmare and 'clear the air' with regard to recent school events.

Published 2018-09-15 04:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2018-09-15 04:00:01 UTC

"Headmare Twilight can see you now."

Spike escorts Prince Rutherford of Yakyakistan into Twilight’s office. The headmare rises from behind her desk and walks to the center of the room. “Thank you Spike,” she says as he nods and departs. Her horn emits a glow as a chair is levitated towards their position.

“Prince Rutherford, how nice of you to visit. Please, have a seat.”

Rutherford promptly leaps onto the chair and smashes it to bits, sending shrapnel flying across the room.

Twilight maintains a warm smile as she dusts off splinters from her mane. “So, what can I do for you today?”

“YAKS HAVE CONCERNS REGARDING FRIENDSHIP EDUCATION OF YONA,” Rutherford bluntly states.

“Well, hopefully I can put your concerns to rest today,” Twilight says as she walks around her desk and takes a seat. “Where would you like to begin?”

“YAKS NOT LIKE THAT YONA ATTACKED AT FORMER PRINCESS CASTLE. YONA YOUNG. YONA NOT READY FOR BATTLE.”

Twilight responds congenially but firmly. “As we have informed you and our other esteemed dignitaries, none of our students were harmed in any way. It is our top priority … my top priority … to ensure that all students, ponies and non-ponies, receive a top-notch education in friendship, in a safe and secure environment. I hope that answer is to your satisfaction.”

Rutherford grunts in acceptance.

“Now, is there anything else you wish to discuss?”

“EXPLAIN FIELD TRIP WITH BLUE AND ORANGE TEACHER-PONIES.”

A bead of sweat forms upon Twilight’s forehead. “Ah yes, the one organized by Applejack and Rainbow Dash, two of our most renowned educators at—”

“YONA ALMOST DROWN!!!”

Twilight’s eyes dart this way and that. “Yes … well … AJ and Rainbow did fill me in on the details at a later time. I can tell you that disciplinary actions were taken against those two, and I assure you that future excursions will—”

“HOW NEGLIGENT TEACHER-PONIES DISCIPLINED?”

“Well … the truth is, the students thought that their actions were deserving of the ‘teacher of the month’ award. But that was before I learned—”

“YOU REWARD NEGLIGENT TEACHER-PONIES???”

Rutherford lowers his head and, using his horns, flips Twilight’s desk upside-down, scattering papers around the area. He proceeds to smash the desk to bits as Twilight backs away, fear creeping in to her demeanor.

“Prince Rutherford, AJ and Rainbow did apologize profusely to the students, and to Yona in particular, for the *ahem* unfortunate circumstances that happened as a result of their actions. But you are correct in calling me out on not informing Yakyakistan sooner; I should have been more forthcoming of this information. I humbly ask for your forgiveness.”

Twilight bows, still standing behind the broken bits of timber that once was her desk. Rutherford grumbles for a minute.

“YAKS CAN … FORGIVE … FOR PONY NEGLIGENCE, AS YONA UNHARMED FROM FIELD TRIP.”

Twilight breathes a sigh of relief. “I thank you, Prince Rutherford, for your understanding. I’m glad we were able to come to a consensus here, and if there is no further—”

“EXPLAIN SUBSTITUTES!”

The fresh question catches Twilight off-guard. “I’m sorry, you mean—”

“YONA LEARN ASSERTIVENESS TRAINING FROM MINOTAUR. YAKS NOT PLEASED WITH MINOTAUR METHODS OF FRIENDSHIP.”

“Ah yes, that, er, unfortunate set of teachers. I can assure you that we in no way condone the advice given by Iron Will’s lecture. The party responsible for that hiring decision no longer has an active role in the decision-making processes of this school.”

“EXPLAIN EXERCISE.”

Rutherford’s terse question causes further shivering from Twilight. “Um … exercise?”

“YONA ASKED TO DO LAPS. YONA GIVEN NEGATIVE REINFORCEMENT TO DO MORE LAPS.”

“Oh, that also involved Discord. Yeah, he was a bit of a hoofful while I was away—”

“YONA ATTACKED BY BUGBEAR!!!”

Rutherford leaps into the air and stomps on the ground; the resulting shockwave causes the windows to shatter, bookshelves to topple over, and portraits to fall from the walls. His fiery-red eyes stare down the quivering headmare.

“Starlight-took-full-control-of-the-situation-and-no-creature-got-injured-I-assure-you-everyone-was-OK-after-that,” Twilight rushes to state, before taking several breaths and recomposing herself. “You have to understand … Discord is not evil … well, not anymore, anyway … but he has weird ways to get his messages across. I know Yona was scared by that bugbear, and for good reason, but rest assured, we do everything we can to ensure the safety of—”

“YONA SWALLOWED BY LIQUID STAIRCASE! YONA CHASED BY GHOSTS! YOU CALL THIS ENSURING SAFETY???”

Twilight sighs and again addresses Rutherford. “You’re right again, of course … in the end, this school is my responsibility. I am sorry for what Yona … for what all the students in the school had to endure while Discord was, well, being Discord. All I can say is that every creature is all right, and for all they’ve been through, their bonds are stronger now than they’ve ever been. This school of friendship is working, and Yona will be a better yak for it.”

Rutherford grumbles again, pacing around the room but careful not to stomp any fallen items. “PURPLE PRINCESS PONY WALKING ON THIN ICE WITH YAKS,” he warns.

“I know,” Twilight says, “and I’m sorry again for what Yona has been through. But she really is someone special. She and the others have come so far, trusting each other to be there for one another in times of—”

“EXPLAIN ACCUSATION.”

Ho boy, forgot about that one, Twilight thinks to herself. “Prince Rutherford, I know of the incident you’re about to bring up, but before you overreact, I assure you—”

“YOU SMEAR YONA’S GOOD WORD! YOU SMEAR ALL YAKS WITH FALSE ACCUSATION!!!”

Enraged, Rutherford begins leaping on everything not already smashed to bits … toppled bookshelves, books, cabinets. Twilight closes her eyes, winces, and waits for the sounds of smashing items to cease. When all becomes silent again, she cautiously opens her eyes to see Rutherford staring her down once again.

“As I was saying,” Twilight calmly responds, “the culprit did eventually step forward and took responsibility for the events of Hearthswarming Eve. Yona and the other innocent parties were completely exonerated, and it was their decision to remain at the school over the break.”

The fire gradually recedes from Rutherford’s eyes. He composes himself before responding.

“YAKS GLAD TO HEAR THIS. YAKS NOT ONES FOR SENSELESS DESTRUCTION … ONLY FOR CELEBRATORY AND PURPOSEFUL DESTRUCTION.”

Rutherford takes one final breath. “PURPLE PRINCESS PONY EXPLANATIONS SATISFACTORY FOR YAKS, FOR NOW. YONA HAPPY HERE, WHICH IS MOST IMPORTANT TO YAKS. PLEASE BE MORE CAREFUL WITH YONA GOING FORWARD … OR YAKS WILL REALLY GET ANGRY. GOOD DAY.”

Rutherford gives one final bow, turns, and departs the room.

Twilight looks around the area, now surrounded by all manners of debris and destruction. She sighs as her horn illuminates, and a small portion of clutter gradually levitates towards a corner of the room.

A knock on the door causes Twilight to lose concentration as her horn ceases glowing and the hovering clutter crashes back to the floor. “Come in,” she bellows as she turns to the door.

Spike peeks his head in. “So … how did the meeting go?”

Twilight looks at her assistant as if he just sprouted a second head. “How do you think it went?”

Spike takes a look around. “Not well, I guess.”

Twilight sighs. “It’s not your fault, Spike. Prince Rutherford made a lot of good points; I do need to do a better job taking care of our students. Anyway, you have news?”

“Just a reminder that Dragonlord Ember is waiting for you; she wants to discuss a recent substitute hiring, among other concerns.”

Twilight groans, takes one final look around her office, and turns to Spike.

“Just prep the fire extinguishers and tell her I’ll be ready in five minutes!”