Chapters Of All the Nerf!!! Part Two
"Alright, girls!" Scootaloo paced in front of her two friends. "We have to decide who we're going to fight with. I, of course, am going to choose Rainbow Dash!"
"Of course." Apple Bloom said, rolling her eyes. She frowned. "But Ah think Ah have to help Applejack on this one. She's mah sister."
"Huh. Didn't stop you being against her last year." Scootaloo pointed out.
"Well, Ah guess not." Apple Bloom said.
"I want to fight with Rarity, and she's on Dash's team!" Sweetie Belle stated. "And taking over Canterlot might be fun!"
"That's the spirit!" Scootaloo praised. "Lets go see Rainbow Dash and enlist in her army!"
"Cutie Mark Crusader Soldiers, yay!!!"
Rainbow Dash was busy trying to plan battle strategies with Rarity, Trixie, and Spike when the door to her office burst open and three familiar fillies raced in. They lined up in front of the older ponies(and dragon) and saluted smartly.
"Cutie Mark Crusaders reporting for duty!!" They chorused.
"We want to join up!" Scootaloo added.
"Well, squirt, we can always use good soldiers." Dash said, grinning. "Guys?" She looked to her three advisors.
"I say these three make fine soldiers." Rarity said.
"Let em join, I say!" Spike said.
"Eh, sure, why not?" Trixie put in, waving a hoof dismissively. "Perhaps Trixie can keep them close at hoof so no harm comes to them."
"Well, I'll keep Scoots with me, and Rarity will keep Sweetie Belle, so you can keep Apple Bloom." Dash said.
"Wow!" Apple Bloom said, looking at the magician. "Will ya teach me some tricks??"
"Sure, why not?" Trixie replied with a smirk. "Perhaps Trixie can make you a magician, too. You can be Trixie's Great and Powerful Assistant!"
"I thought that was Starlight." Rarity said. Dash snapped her head around.
"Do not mention that traitor's name in my presence!" She said in irritation. "Or the other one's!"
"What, Fluttershy?" Rarity grinned as Dash scowled deeply.
"All I have done for that pegasus from the time we were fillies," Dash growled. "And she stabs me in the back! Well, she just better hope we don't meet in battle! In fact, she better hope somepony kills her in battle, or I will capture her, and if I do I will have her shot as a traitor!"
"Trixie believes she likes your attitude." Trixie said, grinning. "But isn't that just a little bit drastic?"
"What would you do if your lifelong friend switched sides on you?" Dash demanded. Trixie pondered that.
"Trixie would shoot her with magic." She said. "And perhaps turn her into a flying feathered lemon." All eyes locked on her in astonishment. "What? Trixie can get revenge and have fun doing it without actually hurting anypony!"
"Yeah, ok, whatever." Dash said. "Alright, Crusaders. You know what your orders are, right?"
"I'm with you." Scootaloo said.
"I'm with Rarity." Sweetie Belle said, beaming.
"An' Ah'm with Trixie!" Apple Bloom said excitedly, leaping to the magician's side. "Ah'm her Great and Powerful Assistant!"
"That's Starlight's position." Rarity said, shaking her head, ignoring Dash's glare.
"Well, fine. Then she is Trixie's Second Greatest and Most Powerful Assistant." Trixie said.
"Yes!" Apple Bloom cried. Dash snorted.
"Great." She said. Her eyes locked into Trixie's. "Trixie, I'm warning you. You take good care of her. Anything happens to her on your watch, AJ is gonna kill you. And I don't mean if anything happens in this war. I mean if anything literally bad happens."
"Relax, Rainbow Dash." Trixie said, laying her foreleg over her young assistant. "Trixie will guard her young charge with her life. And that is a promise."
"You better." Dash said. "Alright. For now, you fillies can go on your first mission."
"What is it, Rainbow Dash?" Scootaloo asked.
"Trot to the kitchen and bring us a refill of coffee and cookies." Dash winked. "And milk for yourselves."
The fillies squealed and shot off to complete their mission with gusto.
At Sugarcube Corner, Applejack was in Pinkie's party cave under the bakery, strategising. Also present were Pinkie Pie and Starlight.
"Ok. If Ah was Dash, where would Ah hit first?"
"Here!" Pinkie announced. "The bakery is the Defender's main supply of food and drink. They take this place, then Town Hall, they will have control of the whole town!"
"Huh." Applejack said. "That's actually smart. If they beat us here and at Town Hall, Ponyville falls. Huh. Why didn't Ah think of that? Commander Pinkie, station your troops around this bakery. Ah'll go rally a group to surround Town Hall." Pinkie saluted.
"Yes, Ma'am! You heard her, Captain Gummy. Let's prepare to defend Sugarcube Corner!" Gummy gave his usual slow blink before his owner grabbed him up and trotted off. Applejack shook her head. Then she looked to Starlight.
"How safe do ya suppose the bakery is with her watchin' it?"
"General Applejack," Starlight said. "Commander Pinkie will use every means in her power to stop the enemy. Including using whipped cream guns, cupcakes, and whatever else she can think of."
"Well, alright, then." Applejack said. "Lets leave her to it and go set up defenses round Town Hall!" The two mares hurried out of the party cave.
Meantime, in Canterlot, Twilight, Celestia, and Luna were calmly discussing the war.
"This will not end as quickly as last year." Luna said.
"Oh, no." Twilight agreed. "They'll go on for days. But I honestly don't think Dash's Rebels will make it here. I'll be quite suprised if she does."
"She seems determined to come destroy us." Celestia said in amusement.
"Not to worry. I don't intend to die in this war." Twilight said.
"Nor do I." Luna agreed.
"Have we made sure that no actual harm will come to the Rebels if they make it here?" Celestia asked.
"Yes." Twilight said. "The guards have been briefed and armed with Nerf guns and foam swords. Trust me, nopony will suffer any real harm."
The princesses laughed as they considered the war and how ridiculous, but fun, the whole thing was.
"Ok. This is it." Dash gazed intently at her troops. "We take the bakery. And Town Hall. Then the town is ours. Team One, infiltrate and take down. Team Two, stand by. Ready? Move!"
Dash led a charge into Sugarcube Corner. Mrs. Cake shrieked as she saw them. Pinkie Pie leaped in front of them.
"Hold it!" She said, Nerf gun aimed at them. "I'm not afraid to use this! Nopony takes this building. Nopony!"
"Come on, Commander. Surrender peacefully and nopony gets hurt."
"Never!" Pinkie cried. "I will defend this bakery and its owners and every baked good to my last breath!"
"Well, then, we'll have to take it." Dash said.
"I'll never let you take it, General Dashie! Never! I will take you down first!"
She wasn't kidding. Inside of two minutes, with just nerf bullets and baked goods, Pinkie single hoofedly took out over half of the troop Dash had shown up with, and the force of her attacks drove the Rebels to a hasty retreat. The ones who weren't killed, that is.
"Sweet Celestia, she's good!" Dash puffed as she hid behind a building with her surviving fighters. "I almost wish I had her back on my side. Almost ."
"Well, one thing is sure," Rarty announced, as she dislodged icing from her mane. "We failed at securing the bakery. Which means we will only have Town Hall, unless our fellow fighters failed too."
Thankfully, the band of Rebels Trixie had led to Town Hall had successfully battled their way inside, overthrown the guards, taken multiple prisoners, and strung up their flag outside on the pole. A dozen Rebels set up headquarters there and had just finished when Dash arrived.
"Good job." She told Trixie.
"Trixie thanks you." Trixie said. "And did the battle for the bakery go as planned?"
"No." Dash huffed. "Pinkie destroyed over half my attacking force. Mostly with cupcakes."
"Well, lets try again."
So Dash reluctantly led her weary troops back to the bakery. Pinkie Pie was nowhere in sight. Only a certain green alligator wearing a tiny battle helmet and mini sword. This time, after laughing at the sight, they successfully took over the bakery and stuck their Rebel flag in the window...then carted off the frightening green guard as a prisoner while he gave an extra slow blink.
The war was starting to look good for them now!
Author's Note
More chapters to come!
Of All the Nerf!!! Part Two
Applejack flung her Stetson on table in frustration and growled.
"Tarnation!!" She said. "How they hay did they push back so hard? We shoulda kept both those places! Once they got hold of them, it was easy for them to get the whole town." Her eyes narrowed as she whirled to stand snout to snout with her two best officers. "Commander Pinkie. Commander Glimmer. Ya'll wanna explain to me how they broke past ya'll's defenses? Hmm?"
"Well, in my defense," Starlight said. "Trixie led the charge on Town Hall. And, um, she put an immobilizing spell on me before I realised it. I never had a chance to use my own magic. Huh. She is getting really good."
"That ain't the point, Starlight!" Applejack huffed. "The point is, ya shoulda seen her comin'! From a mile away! Now, Ah ask ya: why didn't ya??" Starlight drew a breath and sighed.
"To be honest, I, um, wasn't in the Twon Hall tower..." she blushed. Applejack stared.
"What?!" She exclaimed. "Ya left your post?! Why in tarnation did ya do that?!"
"Uh...well...I, um..." Starlight gulped. "I...I...um..."
"Consarn it, girl, spit it out!!" Applejack said in agitation. Starlight gulped, not sure she could. She was spared further trying when the pony at her side piped up.
"It was me, General Applejack!" She said cheerfully. "I hauled in cupcakes and cocoa for our troops to help keep up their strength!" Starlight sighed in relief. Until she caught a glimpse of Applejack's face. Their general looked fit to be tied. Her expression was one of anger, annoyance, aggrivation and shock, and her eyes narrowed dangerously. Starlight winced.
"Commander Pinkie." Applejack's voice was low and strained, as she fought to control her temper. "Are ya tellin' me what Ah think you're tellin' me?"
"I dunno. Are you thinking I said I took cupcakes to Town Hall? Cause yeah, I said that! They needed food so they could fight those Rebels!" Applejack rubbed her snout.
"Pinkie Pie. Who was at the bakery for the second attack?"
"Why, Captain Gummy, of course!" Pinkie giggled. "He may be little and green and not have teeth, but you do not want to mess with him! He's my right hoof alligator! No better soldier anywhere!"
"Is that so?" Applejack said, pushing her snout against Pinkie's. "Then how in tarnation did those Rebel varmints take the bakery?" Pinkie blinked.
"They did???!" She shrieked. "Oh no!! Gummy!!! Where is he?! Was he hurt?!"
"Pinkie Pie," Applejack said. "How do ya not know they took over??"
"I was at the store stocking up to make more cupcakes! Then you called us here to your farm and I don't know what happened in town! Is Gummy ok?!" Applejack took a deep breath.
"At the store. Ya were at the store. After Ah put ya in charge of defendin' the bakery."
"And all the baked goods!" Pinkie yelled. "Did they suffer too?! Oh, please, Applejack, tell me they didn't hurt the baked goods!!"
"Ah'm pretty sure they got eaten." Applejack said, groaning.
"And Gummy?! Is he ok?"
"Ah honestly don't know." Pinkie let out a shriek and rushed out of the house to go save her beloved alligator.
"Applejack? You ok?" Starlight asked, arching an eyebrow at her leader. Applejack rubbed her head and groaned.
"Ah think Ah'm startin' to see why Dash wanted to kill her. 'Guard the bakery', Ah said. 'Nopony gets through,' she said. An' then she goes off deliverin' baked goods and stockin' up to make more! Ah don't know what Ah'm gonna do if-" She was cut off as the door crashed open and a very breathless Pinkie exploded into the room.
"Applejack!!" She yelled. "They have Gummy!! They took him prisoner!! I need guns and swords and cupcakes and pies and anything else I can hit em with! I'm taking my troop and going to save him!"
"Pinkie, you can't just go barging into town!" Starlight said. "Its not our territory, now. The Rebels have control and if you get caught you'll get killed!"
"Commander Glimmer." Pinkie sounded quite firm and determined. "They took Gummy. Nopony takes Gummy and lives to tell about it. Nopony ."
"I haven't ever heard of anypony actually taking Gummy before." Starlight said.
"Exactly ." Pinkie said. Starlight blinked.
"Pinkie, Ah don't think its such a good idea to do this." Applejack said. "Ponyville is crawlin' with Rebels. Granted, Dash and her main force have headed off towards Canterlot, but she left a good many Rebels in town."
"I am going to save Gummy." Pinkie said. "And it was Dash and her main force that took him."
"Uh oh." Starlight said under her breath, feeling a small pang of pity for the Rebel General.
"Oh. Well, then, we'll move out an' go after em!" Applejack said. "We'll stop em from gettin' to Canterlot and Ah guess save Gummy, too."
"Let me have Dashie." Pinkie said darkly. "She took my pet, and I am gonna decorate her!!"
"I think you mean decimate her, right? As in, destroy her?" Starlight offered.
"No. I mean decorate her!" Pinkie said, scowling. "I am going to stand her in front of my party canon and decorate her in so much frosting and sprinkles and whipped cream and ice cream it'll take her a month to get it all off! And I may throw in some bags of sugar, a ton of cookie dough, a bunch of flour, unbaked cake and a whole bag of salt!"
"Wouldn't that be, you know...a salt and battery ?" Starlight snickered at her own joke. Pinkie allowed herself a quick giggle, then scowled again.
"Yeah. And I won't apologise to her either! She will regret taking my Gummy!"
Applejack and Starlight exchanged glances. Poor Dash. Pinkie was going exact hideous revenge on her.
Dash meantime was leading her troops determinedly towards Canterlot. She was stopped six miles outside of Ponyville by a good sized troop of Applejack's army.
"Uh oh." Scootaloo said, wide eyed.
"Get ready to fight, squirt." Dash said, drawing her sword. Her companion followed suit. Close by, Rarity and Sweetie Belle also drew their weapons, and Trixie braced herself to throw up a shield if needed. Apple Bloom raised her gun. The Defenders charged, and the Rebels attacked with a vengeance. Swords clicked and clacked, foam bullets flew. Trixie blasted mild knockout spells, as well as easily teleporting ponies from close by to further away. Apple Bloom never left her temporary guardian's side. She was content to stay close to her, swinging her sword and firing her gun...until the worst thing that could have happened, happened.
She came face to face with Applejack.
'Oh Ceslestia. Anypony but her!'
"Apple Bloom!" Applejack exclaimed, quite shocked. "What in tarnation are ya doin' on their side?! Ah thought you were gonna be on my side! Unless...did they take ya prisoner?! Brainwash ya?! Cause if so, Ah'll take this here sword an' find Dash an'..."
"No! Ah chose this side!" Apple Bloom interrupted. "Ah ain't brainwashed, Applejack! An' it ain't General Dash's fault, neither! All us Crusaders joined up with the Rebel side!" Applejack blinked and looked around. Sure enough, nearby she spied Rarity and Dash with their sisters at their sides, fighting. She looked at her sister.
"Bloom, are ya fightin' all alone?" She asked.
"No she isn't!" Trixie jumped forward. "She is Trixie's Second Greatest and Powerfullest Assistant...and temporary charge." Applejack narrowed her eyes.
"Are ya tellin' me that you're the one watchin' mah sister??" She demanded.
"Oh, please, Applejack, relax." Trixie said, rolling her eyes. "Trixie gave Dash her word she would let nothing bad happen to this filly and would guard her with her life. Trixie does not break promises."
"Well, alrighty then." Applejack said. "But ya better not let nothin' bad happen to her...an' Ah'm not talkin' bout in this here war. Ah mean it literally. Ah find out ya did, an' nothin ' will keep me from buckin' your hide all the way to Las Pegasus . Ya got that?"
"Loud and clear, Applejack. Trust me. Trixie's got this." Trixie winked at her young charge, who giggled. Then Apple Bloom locked eyes with her sister, who was now her enemy.
"Sis. Ah think ya better get ready. Cause Ah'm a Rebel, an' Ah gotta take ya down!"
"Oh ya do, do ya?" Applejack said. "Well, lets see what ya got, then, AB."
The two crossed swords and started fighting in earnest. Applejack was impressed with her sister's ability to fight. After a brief five minute struggle, Apple Bloom succeeded in knocking Applejack's sword from her grasp. She sighed.
"Big sis, Ah am sorry for what Ah'm gonna do..." she grinned. "But not too sorry!"
With a gleeful shout, she slashed at her sister's forelegs, succeeding in getting one. Applejack yelled and went down.
"AB, how could ya?!" She cried. She looked up. "Ya better finish me off, Ah guess."
"Ah ain't gonna." Apple Bloom said, some part of her still loyal to her sister, even if she was an enemy. So saying, she dashed off to join Trixie just as the magician was about to get attacked by a burly stallion wielding a gun. Applejack smirked.
'Lil sis, ya might have won this round, but Ah'm gonna get ya next time !' She used her 'good' hoof to grab her sword and ward off several Rebels who were now trying to attack her. Across the field, she saw Pinkie Pie come to a full stop in front of Dash, saying something. She chuckled. That was something she wished she could hear!
Pinkie Pie faced Dash, eyes narrowed.
"You. Took. Gummy." She spoke slowly and deliberately.
"Well, duh! This is war !" Dash said. "We took him prisoner!" Pinkie scowled.
"General Rainbow Dash." Her voice was almost as cold as her icy blue eyes. "You took Gummy. Prepare to suffer my wrath." Dash snorted.
'Wrath. Yeah right !'
"Whoa!!!"
Pinkie attacked with gusto, sword slashing, intent on taking Dash down. Or at least capturing her for the sworn revenge to be exacted by her party canon. Dash ducked and dodged, suddenly realising it might not have been such a great idea to capture Gummy after all.
"Hey, back off, party pony! Trixie will defend her general!" Trixie yelled as she leaped to the rescue, Apple Bloom at her side. Together, they helped Dash drive back the vengeful Pinkie, who soon retreated to rethink her plans of attack. In less than twenty minutes more, the Rebels broke through the Defenders' line and made their way onward to Canterlot.
Author's Note
I regret nothing , in any of the chapters of this story...
Of All the Nerf!!! Part Two
More Battles to be Fought
At the Canterlot Castle, the Princesses were keeping tabs on the progress of the war. It was growing late in the afternoon of day three of the war, and a new report stated that the Rebels had been spotted making a camp of sorts about twelve miles outside Ponyville, on their way to Canterlot. Not only that, but Rebels from towns around Equestria were making their way to Canterlot as well, from all sides.
"Well, this is going well." Twilight commented drily. "Dash has half of Equestria on her side. Give or take a few ponies and creatures."
"Speaking of creatures..." Celestia eyed a chittering squirrel seated on the table happily eating a nut. "Fluttershy, was in really neccessary to relocate all your animal friends here, to the castle?"
"Oh, yes!" Fluttershy said. "I wanted them safe while I was defending against Rebels."
"But you aren't defending, Fluttershy." Twilight said. "You're hiding in the castle."
"Oh! Oh no! I wouldn't! I'm...I'm going to go defend...um...something..." Fluttershy gulped and eeped, respectively. Her voice softened further. "Though I really don't want to because of Dash..."
"Fluttershy." Twilight said. "I wanted you to be out scouting with some of the Canterlot Pegasi...not cowering in here because you're afraid you might meet Rainbow Dash."
"Oh, but, Twilight, you heard her!" Fluttershy shivered. "She was so mad at me. What if I do meet her? She said she would end me. And without mercy." Another shudder.
"This is war, Fluttershy." Twilight stated. "Ponies make threats. Besides, its not like she can literally end you. A poke from a foam sword or a nerf bullet isn't going to hurt you. Not really. You know that from being hit last year."
"But she is so mad." Fluttershy whimpered. "I...I really don't want to face her..." Twilight facehoofed.
"Fluttershy," Celestia said with a warm smile. "It really would be a favor to us if you would go scouting with the other Pegasi. Especially since we would like to ensure no animals are in the path of any battles." Fluttershy gulped and stood still, clearly torn between going and saving animals, and hiding herself from Dash's vengeance.
"The...the animals will be ok." She said nervously. "I won't be ok if I get spotted by Dash. I'm so sorry."
"Fluttershy, be brave and bold!" Twilight said. "Be assertive and courageous!"
"Oh, I am. But I want to do it right here...hidden in the castle. Under the table. With my animals." Fluttershy faltered. Twilight arched an eyebrow at that.
"Are you a Pegasus, Commander Fluttershy? Or a chicken?"
"Oh, a chicken. Definitely a chicken." Fluttershy was quick to say. "See? Bawk, bawk. Squawk. Chicken. See?"
Luna collapsed back in her seat in a fit of laughter, while Celestia tried to swallow her giggles. Unsuccessfully. Twilight groaned.
"Please just go, Fluttershy! I'm begging you!" She said pleadingly. "You wanted to defend Equestria and Canterlot and us, so go out there and defend us! Go scouting! Check on the animals. They need you. Save the animals, Fluttershy !" Fluttershy gulped.
"Well, um...ok." she started to leave the room, only to pause at the door and look back. "Um, so, if I see Rainbow Dash..."
"Yes?" Twilight said.
"Um...if I see her...um...permission to run and hide?"
"Oh for...find Applejack and ask her!" Twilight huffed. Fluttershy left.
"Do you suppose she will be fine?" Luna inquired, giggling.
"I think she'll manage. Somehow." Celestia said, smirking.
"Oh yeah, sure." Twilight said with a sigh. "She'll manage. Hidden in a cave or a tree with whatever animals she finds. I am going to choke Dash when I finally get ahold of her, scaring Fluttershy so much. War or not, it was uncalled for."
Luna and Celestia only laughed and Twilight sighed before planting her head on the table in frustration.
Dash and her troops had set up camp for the evening, eager to rest up so they could go fight the next morning. Rarity, Trixie, the Crusaders and Spike all sat with her around a campfire. And of course Gummy sat with them, next to Apple Bloom.
"You realise you're associating with a prisoner of war, right?" Dash said.
"Rainbow Dash," Scootaloo said. "We are gonna have to treat Gummy like family from here on out. If we don't, and if anything happens to him, if he's harmed in any way, Pinkie Pie is gonna be madder than ever."
"She has a point, darling." Rarity said. "You know how Pinkie Pie is about her dear pet." She smiled at the little alligator, who blinked slowly.
"Yeah..." Dash said. "Ok. So maybe taking Gummy was a bad idea. A very bad idea. But we did, and its done, so now we'll just have to live with whatever vengeance Pinkie decides to dish out."
"Not we , Darling." Rarity said. "You . You are the one who decided to take him, and it is you Pinkie Pie wants to destroy. We were just unfortunate to be with you."
"Well, when we win this war, I'll just have Pinkie thrown in a dungeon or something, so she can't do anything."
"Yes, well, good luck with that, Rainbow Dash."
"What do you mean, good luck??"
"It's Pinkie Pie, remember? She can literally get out of anything."
"Well, maybe she'll forget we...I, took Gummy."
"Darling, Pinkie forgets nothing. And I do mean, nothing ."
"Oh. Well, horsefeathers."
"If it would help," Trixie spoke up cheerfully. "Trixie will turn her into a flying feathered pink lemon for you."
"I don't think that's a thing." Dash said.
"It is if the Great and Powerful Trixie says it is."
"I don't want her turned into a...what you just said. But thanks anyway."
"Don't mention it. Trixie's offer is non expiring, if you change your mind."
"Yeah. Ok."
"So," Sweetie Belle interrupted. "What's the plan for tomorrow?"
"Well, there's alot of farms and stuff between here and Canterlot," Dash said. "Applejack and her forces will be looking to stop us at every turn. Thankfully we have ponies in all the towns surrounding Canterlot on our side. Last I heard, they took their towns and are marching on Canterlot, too."
"Aw, taking that castle will be so easy!" Scootaloo said with a smirk.
"That's the spirit, kid!" Dash praised.
"Ah'm a bit worried to face Applejack again." Apple Bloom said suddenly. "Ah mean, Ah did wound her in battle."
"Now don't you worry, Great and Powerful Assistant." Trixie assured her. "Trixie will have your back."
"Yeah!" Sweetie Belle said. "And its not like she'll be mad forever. Just til the war ends." Apple Bloom brightened.
"Yeah!" She yawned.
"Ok, you three." Dash said. "Hit the hay. And take Gummy with you!" The fillies obeyed, leaving the grown ponies and Spike to talk battle stategies by the fire.
Applejack had moved her forces around and ahead of Dash's, camping about a mile and a half in front of them. She was sitting with Starlight and Pinkie Pie discussing battle plans.
"I'm going to get that Dash!" Pinkie stated. "She'll regret taking Gummy. And if he gets hurt, she'll regret it even more!"
"Dash will take care of him, Pinkie." Starlight told her. "She isn't mean."
"Eeyup." Applejack agreed. "Sides, Spike an' Rarity an' them young'uns won't let anythin' happen to him."
"And Trixie?" Pinkie asked.
"She won't hurt him." Starlight said. "She might use him for magic practice, but she won't hurt him." Pinkie huffed.
"So when they get to us tomorrow," Applejack said,"we need to be ready." The other two nodded. At that moment a familiar pegasus dropped from the sky.
"Fluttershy? What in tarnation are ya doin' out here?!" Applejack asked.
"Scouting." Fluttershy said, breathlessly. "I wanted to drop in and say hello. Oh...oh my. Applejack, you...you're hurt." She indicated the red bandage around the other pony's leg. Red bandages indicated mock injuries sustained in battle. Real injures of any kind were doctored with white bandages, whether battle related or otherwise.
"Oh, that. No big deal. AB got me earlier today."
"Apple Bloom is with the Rebels??!" Fluttershy gasped.
"Huh. I did not see that coming." Starlight said, shaking her head.
"Did...is Dash with them?" Fluttershy asked nervously.
"Eeyup." Applejack said, and Fluttershy eeped in terror. "Aw, sugarcube. Are ya still worried bout Dash's threat?"
"Y...yes."
"Well, Ah'm tellin' ya, she ain't gonna actually hurt ya. Get ya with her sword or somethin' but not actually hurt ya." Fluttershy sighed.
"You better stay here for the night." Starlight said. "We're ambushing the Rebels tomorrow."
"Oh. Oh my. And...and do you want me to help??"
"We need all the extra hooves we can get."
"Oh my." Fluttershy shuddered at the thought that tomorrow, she could very easily face her sworn enemy, who had promised to end her if they met in battle. A prospect that didn't set well with Fluttershy. She shivered. Well, she couldn't very well abandon her fellow soldiers. Unless, maybe, it wasn't an order...
"Um, Applejack? Are you...is this...am I ordered to stay?"
"Eeyup."
Well, there went that hope.
"Oh my."
As Fluttershy sat staring at the fire, one thought crossed her mind.
'I hope Dash makes my death quick and painless .'
Of All the Nerf!!! Part Two
We have Arrived to Attack...
Celestia's sun was shining brightly when Dash moved her troops out of camp and towards Canterlot. They'd gone little further than a mile when she halted them and stood looking around.
"What's wrong, General Dash?" Spike asked from his place next to Scootaloo.
"Something doesn't feel right." Dash said, eyes scanning the surrounding countryside. She thought she saw a flash of orange, and stared hard at the spot. When nothing else happened, she scowled.
"Alright, lets move. But proceed with caution and for Celesta's sake keep your weapons ready! Something is really off, but I don't know what."
"Trixie might know." The magician was scanning their surrounding as well, but was using a scanner spell to detect the slightest movement or sound. She picked up on a flash of pink. "Ah. Yes. Trixie knows." She looked at Dash. "We appear to have company, General."
Her words proved true when Defenders came bursting out of hiding all around them, yelling. So sudden was the attack that a good many of Dash's troops fell at the hooves of the enemy.
"Chaaaaarge!" Dash yelled, and lunged into the fray with her friends following. Rarity and Sweetie Belle fought valiantly side by side, but all too soon the former was struck in the chest by a bullet and let out a shriek.
"No! Rarity!" Sweetie Belle cried, as her sister calmly laid herself down on a patch of grass(in the shade, I might add), and began to die...quite theatrically.
"Oh Sweetie! I'm hit!" She cried. "Oh! I haven't long, little sister!" Sweetie Belle came and flung her forelegs around her.
"No!" She said. "Hang on, Rarity! Please don't die! Please! We still have to take Canterlot! And then Equestria! Please don't die!" Rarity laid her head down on her sister's neck and let out a dramatic gasp.
"Oh Sweetie Belle...you will have to...take Canterlot...for the both of us." She gasped out. "And always remember, I love you!" She twitched, kicked one leg, let out a long and raspy shriek, then put her head down on her forelegs and lay very still.
"Oh Rarity!" Sweetie Belle wailed. A blue blur swept in. Dash stared.
"Oh no, Rarity!" She said. She sighed. "Sleep well in eternity. I'll miss you. Come on, Sweetie!" She dragged the filly away, back into battle. They fought their way to the others.
"Rarity?" Spike asked.
"Gone." Dash said.
"Oh not Rarity!" Spike gasped. He hung his head and sighed heavily.
Dash rolled her eyes, then led her companions into the thick of yet another surge of Defenders. This one was led by Applejack herself, accompanied by Pinkie. Starlight circled around to cut off Trixie.
"So, you want to fight the Great and Powerful Trixie, do you?" Trixie challenged her friend...er..current enemy. "Well. Trixie is ready for you."
"Yeah! With her Second Greatest and Most Powerful Assistant!" Apple Bloom piped up proudly. Starlight raised an eyebrow at Trixie.
"So. Replacing me already, eh, Trix? That's not very nice of you."
"Yes, well...note she is Trixie's Second Greatest ..."Trixie pointed out.
"Oh, that makes all the difference for sure." Starlight said drily. Then she grinned. "Alright, Great and Powerful Trixie..." she glanced at the filly beside her "...and assistant. Prepare to be defeated!"
Trixie threw up a shield just in time to protect herself and her young charge from a blast of magic that, at worst, would have knocked them both head over hooves. She let it drop and fired back with a low strength knockout spell...enough to daze but not to actually cause unconciousness. Starlight blocked it with a shield. The two stood glaring at each other. A sudden, filly-ish yell was Starlight's only warning before Apple Bloom charged in and walloped her sword across her flank. Hard.
"Ow! Hey!" Starlight yelled, spinning around to see who had dared to actually swat her. Seeing the filly, she smirked. "So, that's how you want to fight, is it? Ok, little filly. You asked for it!" Apple Bloom yelped as Starlight's horn started glowing, but before she could run, she was captured in the older pony's magic and held gently but firmly.
"Let me go!" She yelled.
"Ohhhhh, no!" Starlight smirked. "You swat your elders on the flank, you pay the price."
"Trixie, help!" Apple Bloom wailed. Trixie immediately started to leap to her aid, but a quick burst of magic from Starlight paralyzed her in her track. Literally.
"An immobilizing spell." Trixie said drily. "How very rude. Trixie is not amused!" Starlight grinned as she used another glow of magic to draw her own sword and raise it...right above the flank of the squirming filly in her grasp. Apple Bloom instantly tensed.
'Uh oh. Maybe hittin' her on the flank wasn't a good idea after all !'
Starlight's grin widened, then she brought the sword down across the filly's flank with a good bit of force. Being foam, it didn't hurt much...it just left a small sting that made Apple Bloom blink. Her yelp was more of shock than pain. After a second smack, Starlight lowered her sword and set the filly down.
"Next time, don't swat me." She grinned. "Stab me, shoot me...don't swat me."
"Ah won't!" Apple Bloom said. Trixie recovered her powers pf mobility and stepped towards Starlight, eyes flashing.
"How dare you attack Trixie's assistant!" She huffed. "Trixie demands an apology!"
"Nope." Starlight said. "It was fair." This was met with violence as Trixie and her charge pounced on the smug unicorn and proceeded to thrash her without mercy.
Dash was fighting Applejack and Pinkie Pie as forcefully as possible, with Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle valiantly assisting her. The fillies were surprisingly adept at sword fighting, dishing out more than what they got. Spike was not only employing sword and gun, but also a very moderate degree of dragon flame breath...very very moderate. With no lasting damage.
"For Rarity!!" Was his battle cry each time he cut a pony down. "For my dear, sweet Rarity!!" Dash rolled her eyes every time. Then she sent Applejack and Pinkie running, and came face to face with a trembling Fluttershy.
"You!" She said, in a tone that made the other pegasus cringe.
"Um...hi...um...I'm supposed to fight you, I think, so, um..." Fluttershy gulped, and reached out a trembling hoof, poking her so lightly in the foreleg with her sword she might as well not have touched her at all. "Um...there. You...I got you."
At Dash's incredulous look, she gasped and shivered.
"I...I didn't really hurt you, did I? Oh I'm sorry!" She whimpered. Dash rolled her eyes.
"No, you didn't. Thanks for asking. But it won't save you. You are a traitor, and I am going to end you."
"Eep!!" Squeaked Fluttershy...and she promptly lifted off the ground and flew for her life towards Canterlot, leaving a startled Dash to stare after her in shock. Within earshot and eyesight, Applejack and Pinkie Pie exchanged astonished looks.
"Twilight made her a scout?? An' we armed her and dragged her out to fight??
The Rebels put up a massive fight, giving the Defenders a run for their money, matching every bullet and sword stroke with one of their own. At the end of an hour, nearly two thirds of Applejack's troops were sprawled on the battlefield, either wounded or killed, and Dash had lost a little more than half of her own troops. The Defenders were forced to beat a hasty retreat, while the weary but triumphant Rebels marched the rest of the way to Canterlot...completely unstopped along the way. When they arrived at the city, Dash gathered her troops together, noting that there were already Rebel troops surrounding Canterlot on all sides. There could be seen dozens of Defenders lined up and ready to fight. Dash grinned.
"Well, Twilight said we couldn't make it to Canterlot, and we did." She said. "This is gonna be awesome!"
"Maybe not." Trixie observed. "Look who just arrived." Applejack and her remaining forces had just joined the Canterlot Defenders. Everypony just stood in formation and stared each other down.
"Spike!" Dash said. "Send a letter to the Princesses! Tell them we are outside the city, and either to surrender peacefully or be taken by force!"
Spike obeyed the order, and everypony stood waiting for the response.
In the castle, a scroll materialised in front of Celestia, who took it in her magic and unrolled it. She snickered as Luna and Twilight gathered close to read it also.
Dear Princesses Celestia, Luna, and Twilight,
This is to inform you that we have taken control of all towns within fifty miles of Canterlot on all sides and we now have Canterlot, and you, completely surrounded. This is your one final chance to lay down your arms and surrender peacefully, or we will come in and take you by force.
It's up to you. If I were you, I wouldn't wait too long to respond. I'm not known for being patient.
Respectfully,
General Rainbow "Awesome" Dash, Rebel Army
"Well, she proved me wrong by making it past Applejack's army and reaching Canterlot." Twilight said.
"I suppose we should respond immediately." Luna giggled. Celestia smirked. She wrote a few lines on a piece of paper, rolled it, sealed it, and sent it.
"I wish I could see her face when she reads that." She snickered. "Meantime, we better prepare to fight for our lives anf for Equestria."
The giggling princesses hurried to get ready for Dash's takeover.
"Oh boy." Dash siezed it and read it out loud.
Dear General "Awesome" Dash,
We hereby inform you that we will not be surrendering our thrones, or Equestria, to your Rebel Army. While we appreciate the effort you took to give us a last chance to do so, we feel we must fight to defend ourselves.
So, General Dash, you are going to have to take us by force. Or die trying.
Good luck, General.
Respectfully,
Princess Celestia
Dash huffed.
"Alright! They asked for it!" She snapped. "They want force, they're gonna get it! We'll rest up a bit, and then...we attack!!"
*********************************
News of the impending attack was dispatched to Applejack.
"Tarnation. That pony will not give up. Well. We ain't letting them Rebels take Canterlot! Or our Princesses!" A rousing cheer met her statement.
"Applejack." Pinkie said.
"Yeah, sugarcube?"
"Rainbow Dash. She's mine."
"Ah know, Commander. Revenge."
"Permission to blast her with my party canon on sight?"
"First we capture her. Then we try her. Then you can have her."
"Ooh, goody! I can't wait!!! Plus I wanna see Gummy!"
Applejack sighed. "Ah know, Pinkie. Ya said it a hundred times since yesterday." Pinkie only giggled. Starlight shook her head.
Rainbow Dash had no idea how sorry she was going to be for taking Gummy prisoner.
But she was going to be very, very sorry.
Fluttershy was hiding in the room when Dash's letter arrived. Once the others were gone, she read it for herself.
"Oh...oh my...oh my!" She gasped.
And immediately dove back into hiding under the table, with her animals.
'Oh please don't let Dash find me !'
Author's Note
Again, I regret nothing.
Also, at least one more chapter ahead...probably two. Not sure.
Of All the Nerf!!! Part Two
The Great Canterlot Siege
"Everypony ready?" Dash asked.
"Ready when you are, General!" Spike saluted.
"Then in three...two...one...CHAAAAAAARGE!!!!!"
"FOR RARITYYYYYY!!!!" Spike screamed.
The Rebels charged into Canterlot from all directions, yelling and shouting. Applejack met Apple Bloom head on, Starlight went for Trixie, and Pinkie dove for Dash. All around, ponies yelled and screamed dramatically as they were taken down. Some ponies had taken up sniper positions and were picking off easy targets. Pretty much all of Canterlot was out there fighting. Dash and the Rebel forces started breaking through the Defenders' lines, pushing towards the heart of the city...and toward the castle.
"Hold your positions!" Applejack yelled. "Don't let em through!! Keep em occupi-ow!" The last as Apple Bloom scored a lucky slash to her sister's forelegs. Applejack sighed and went down. Apple Bloom charged to Trixie, who was locked in mortal magic combat with Starlight. With a yell, the filly leaped up on Starlight's back and whacked her sword onto her shoulder.
"Gah!" Starlight yelled, as she fell. Apple Bloom pitched forward and might have hit the ground had Trixie not caught her in her magic and quickly set her down.
"You can't beat Trixie!" Trixie crowed. "Or her Second Greatest Assistant!"
"I'm not through with you yet!" Starlight stated, trying to hit them with a blast of magic. Trixie shielded them, then fired a knockout spell.
"Ha. That will keep her out for the next twenty minutes. Let us be off, Assistant!" The two raced back into battle.
Dash was currently in the fight of her life with an enraged Pinkie. She was having trouble blocking her sword thrusts.
"You took Gummy!" Pinkie shouted as she swung at her. "My sweet little Gummy! You will regret that, Rainbow Dash! You will regret it!" A swift whack of her sword nearly knocked Dash down.
"Gah! Pinkie Pie, ease up! I'm sorry I took Gummy!"
"Oh you will be!!! Very sorry!! Then I'll throw you a super duper IamsupersorryItookGummyPrisonerandIwon'tdoitagain party!!" Dash wasn't sure how she could say it so angrily and yet make it sound so awesome and fun at the same time.
"Pinkie, I promise, I'm sorry! And I swear, he's safe! We took good care of him!"
"Good! But I'm still gonna get my revenge cause you shouldn't have taken him to start with! But then I'll give you a cupcake cause you were nice to him!" Dash was starting to get tired. She put on an extra burst of strength and slashed at Pinkie, knocking her head over hooves and into the side of a building. For a second she was worried, but then she heard a giggle and relaxed. She turned.
"Spike! Trixie! Crusaders! Make your way to the castle!"
With her in the lead, they did just that, fighting past Defenders with all their might. They made it to the castle door, and stopped short. Two dozen Royal Guards stood ready for them. Armed with guns and swords.
"Oh, that's not good." Scootaloo muttered. Dash hesitated only briefly before yelling the order to charge. And without question or hesitation, her troops obeyed, charging at the Royal Guards.
On the balcony above, the three princesses watched the Rebel army boldlynand fearlessly attack the Royal Guards.
"Well, so much for them not getting into the castle." Twilight huffed.
"Oh do not worry." Luna said, testing the foam sword she held. "We will just fight back as hard as they are."
"Exactly." Celestia replied. The trio stepped back into the dining room area. Luna paused.
"Sister, do you hear that?" A faint whimpering could be heard. Twilight quickly identified it, and rolled her eyes.
"Commander Fluttershy, come out from under that table!"
"No..." Fluttershy whimpered. "They're coming. She's coming. Oh my. Oh my! Twilight...help..." Twilight groaned. Her horn lit up and she dragged Fluttershy out with her magic.
"Fluttershy, come on. We need you. Be brave."
"I am being brave, Twilight! I'm under the table with my animals. Keeping them calm. They...they are just so scared..."A very ruffled Angel bunny hopped out and glared at her disapprovingly. Luna and Celestia tried not to laugh.
"The animals are scared, huh?" Twilight said. She had an idea. A very devious idea. "Fluttershy, what will happen if Dash makes it up here? All her yelling and carrying on will scare the animals alot more. Don't you think?" Fluttershy's eyes went wide at that.
"Scare them more?? Oh no she doesn't!" With that, the pegasus grabbed her sword and gun and burst out of the room to go stop the Rebels.
"Twilight?" Celestia said, voice an expression nuetral.
"Yes?"
"Did you just send her out there under false pretenses?"
"I might have..."
"That was very devious and highly unethical, not to mention terribly wrong."
"Yes, Princess."
"Twilight Sparkle." Twilight winced a little, sure she was going to get scolded further.
"Y...yes, Princess?"
"I'm so proud of you!"
Twilight's expression of pure shock at her former mentor's completely unexpected statement caused Luna to collapse in a fit of hysterical giggles.
"Keep em back, ya'll!!"
Applejack was now in the castle entryway, fighting desperately to drive back the Rebels. Pinkie and Starlight, the latter with a red bandage plastered on one shoulder, were by her side. The Royal Guards were also fighting valiantly. Some of the Rebels had already been forced back, though Dash and her main force were still pushing through. Scootaloo, Apple Bloom, and Sweetie Belle held a rapid conference before sneaking past the Defenders and Royal Guards and running unnoticed down a long hallway.
Well, almost unnoticed. Dash spied them. She signaled to Trixie and Spike and the three of them slipped after the fillies. Having been to the castle before, the fillies made for the throneroom, figuring that's where the princesses would be. They were right.
"Nopony move!" Scootaloo yelled as she and her companions halted inside.
"Well!" Celestia appeared shocked. "What have we here?"
"We're Rebels!" Sweetie Belle said proudly. "And we're here to take you down, Princess!"
"Yeah! We want ya'lls throne!" Apple Bloom shouted. At that moment, Dash, Trixie, and Spike burst in.
"Hold it!" Dash ordered. Her gaze went to the Crusaders. "You ok?"
"Yeah!" Scootaloo said. By now, yells and shouts indicated that the fight was coming towards them. A second later, Applejack, Starlight, and Pinkie stumbled backwards into the room. Sweetie Belle, taking advantage of the distraction, ran up to the princesses and aimed at Celestia with her gun.
"For my sister!" She shouted, and fired. The nerf bullet bounced harmlessly off the collar Celestia wore. "Oh ponyfeathers." A Royal Guard pounced on the filly, gently but firmly removing her to one side. "Noooo! I'm sorry, Rarity! I failed yoouuuu!"
"Chaaaarge!!" Dash yelled. Her officers did. So did Applejack's . They fought valiantly, the Rebels determined to take over, the Defenders determined to stop them. Scootaloo fired at Twilight a split second before Pinkie pounced on her and carried her over for the guard to watch. The bullet missed. Apple Bloom made a daring rush at Luna, only to be stopped at the last second by her sister and put under 'arrest' with her two friends. Dash, Trixie and Spike managed to take down the Defender leaders and then stood, panting, in front of the princesses, swords ready.
"Surrender or die!" Dash demanded.
"Not surrendering." Celestia said, stepping down to face Dash. Luna stepped down to face Trixie. Which left Twilight facing Spike. The dragon gulped.
'Uh oh. '
The battle between them was astonishingly brief, the three Rebel leaders overpowering the princesses. As they stood there in mild suprise at their victory, the door crashed open.
"Rainbow Dash!!!" Fluttershy yelled. Dash and her companions had no time to react before Fluttershy plowed into them like a bowling ball into bowling pins, sending them sprawling. She drew her sword and attacked.
"You won't get the animals! Or these thrones! Or Equestria!!" She cried. Dash barely had time to lift her sword before Fluttershy swooped down on her. She needn't have even bothered. In less than sixty seconds, Fluttershy had disarmed her and both her officers and was standing over them with her sword pointed at them.
They were finished. And they knew it as the others in the room gathered round.
"Well, it turns out that Fluttershy ended you, Dash." Twilight said smugly. "She just ended the war." Dash looked around at the smirking princesses and Defenders, then at her crestfallen comrades, and her head drooped.
"Well, horseapples. We failed."
Outside, cheers went up as the verdict rang out that the war was over and the Rebels were defeated.
"Now, about you..." Celestia gazed steadily at the captured Rebel General. "You and your high ranking officers." She looked at Trixie and Spike, who gulped. "What to do with you. I'm going to have to think about it. For now, you're all under arrest. Including your young wannabe assassins." She nodded at the Crusaders.
"Princess?" Starlight stepped forward. "May I have permission to, ahem, subdue the prisoners and carry them off to the dungeons?"
"Dungeons??" Sweetie Belle squeaked.
"Go right ahead, Commander Glimmer."
Starlight's horn lit up as she focused on the six prisoners, who all looked visibly nervous. Apple Bloom put a leg around Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo.
"Ah don't think this is gonna be fun..."
A blast of magic hit them, and all six slumped to the floor, out cold. Starlight grinned.
"I've wanted to do that ever since Ponyville." She levitated the sleeping prisoners and carried them off to be imprisoned in a guest room.
The cheers and yells of glee got even louder outside the second the crowd of ponies heard of the arrest of the Rebel General.
Of All the Nerf!!! Part Two
Epilogue: Justice for All
"Alright now! Attention, everypony! The Court of Canterlot will now come to order! The Princesses Celestia, Luna and Twilight presiding."
The alicorns took their places. The court was being convened outside, with all the Defenders and a good many former Rebels present. These Rebels had already accepted whatever 'punishments' the princesses gave. All that remained were the six Rebels that had spent two full days confined to a comfortable guest room.
"First up, Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, and Apple Bloom!" announced Starlight, as two Royal Guards escorted the fillies to stand before the princesses. Before anything further was said, Scootaloo pointed a hoof at the three.
"We aren't sorry!" She shouted. "We're rebels, and proud of it! I know we stormed your castle and tried to assassinate you, but we don't apologise!"
"Yeah!" Apple Bloom chimed in.
"What Scootaloo said!" Sweetie Belle added, stamping a hoof. Luna snickered quietly at their display of defiance, and her fellow princesses looked vastly amused. Celestia cleared her throat.
"Just so I understand this" she said,"You three are confessing to attempted assassination, attempted takeover of Equestria, and you are not apologising for it. Am I correct?" The three fillies glared up at her.
"We will never apologise!" Scootaloo announced determinedly.
"Never! Not even if ya threaten to send us to the moon!" Apple Bloom said, with feeling. Sweetie Belle took a step nearer, ignoring the two guards who moved to block her path. She glared up at the princesses.
"I will never apologise!" She shouted. "My sister died for the Rebel cause! She wouldn't say sorry for it, and neither will I! If I go down, I go down a REBEL!!!" Luna giggled. A nudge from her sister made her straighten up a bit.
"Very well then." Celestia said calmly, glancing at Twilight. "Princess Twilight?" Twilight swallowed a giggle and focused on the Crusaders.
"Cutie Mark Crusaders," she said. "You are guilty of attempted assisanation and attempted world domination. You have refused to show repentance for your actions, and as such will now face harsh sentencing." Luna was struggling to keep from laughing. "As punishment for these crimes, we hereby sentence the three of you to be executed."
"Oh...oh my..." said Fluttershy, who was standing close enough to see the three fillies shudder at the words.
"Um...excuse us one second." Scootaloo said, pulling her friends close in a group huddle. Her voice carried easily to most ponies listening, because she didn't bother to lower it. "Girls, we got problems."
"Ah'll say!" Apple Bloom exclaimed loudly. "Ah'm not hankerin' to die! We're just fillies!" Scootaloo nodded. Sweetie Belle, however, was not swayed.
"We are not just fillies!" She yelled. "We're Rebels! Til the end!!"
"Well, if we apologise, maybe they'll just throw us in a dungeon or something and not kill us." Scootaloo reasoned. Sweetie Belle stamped a hoof.
"I will not apologise!" She shouted. "My sister gave her life on the battlefield, she died with honor and bravery and...and courage! She died a REBEL!! And I may not be on the battlefield, but I'm gonna do just like she did! I'm gonna die a brave, unrepentant Rebel!!!!" Nearby, a certain white unicorn with a purple mane giggled at the filly's words.
"Sweetie Belle, listen to reason!" Scootaloo pleaded. "We don't wanna die, and you don't either. You know you don't."
"Yeah!" Apple Bloom offered. "Do ya really wanna walk up to that there wall over there and look down the barrels of ten nerf guns?! Do ya??!"
"Live as Rebel, die as a Rebel!" Sweetie Belle insisted. "I will never say sorry! I did what I had to, and I'd do it again!" Scootaloo sighed as Apple Bloom shook her head.
"Alright." Scootaloo said. "Then I guess we'll see ya again someday." She and Apple Bloom looked at each other. "Oh ponyfeathers. What am saying?!" She looked back at Sweetie Belle. "Sweetie, if you're gonna give up your life, then I'm gonna do the same. We Crusaders never abandon each other!"
"Yeah!" Apple Bloom said. "Together we live, together we die!" The fillies shared a group hug before turning back to the waiting princesses.
"We are Rebels to the end!" Scootaloo announced.
"Very well." Celestia nodded to Starlight, who motioned to the ten ponies armed with nerf guns. The unicorn then looked at the fillies.
"Lets go."
Side by side, the Rebel youngsters marched solemnly and courageously to the wall and took their places along it. They looked at each other, then stared hard at the 'firing squad' that faced them. Starlight stood by and took a deep breath.
"Ready! Aim.." The ponies aimed their nef guns. "FIRE!!" With soft pops, the guns went off and a spray of foam bullets struck the three fillies gently. A quick look passed between them, and then the three of them proceeded to die.
Spectacularly .
Sweetie Belle uttered a screech and clutched at her chest with one hoof, flailing the other. She threw herself on the ground and squirmed and twitched and kicked before uttering a long, low wail. She jerked one leg, then shut her eyes and lay completely still.
Apple Bloom and Scootaloo had delayed their own deaths in order to watch their friend. Now, Apple Bloom let out a shriek, flopped on the ground, and went into a series of gyrations that one could only assume were meant to be death throes. She sputtered and gasped and panted and kicked. Finally she lifted her head, tensed her whole body into a still statue, uttered one gasping cry, and died, letting her head flop onto the ground as her body relaxed. Scootaloo, meantime, had sprawled on the ground and was actually wailing.
"Oh, I'm dying! Oh, no! Life is over! Don't forget me, Rainbow Dash..." she kicked and flailed, then let out a shriek. "REBEL FOREVER!!" And then she went limp. One leg twitched, and she was completely still.
The princesses, watching from their seats, were trying desperately not to laugh at the completely ridiculous and utterly theatrical deaths of the fillies. Celestia waved at Starlight, who lifted the 'corpses' in her magic and levitated them over into the crowd of ponies, where they could ressurect and watch the remaining sentences.
"General Rainbow Dash, Commander Spike, and Commander Trixie Lulamoon!" Starlight announced, as said ponies were escorted up by the guards. They hadn't seen the actual 'execution' but the dramatic shouts of the fillies had reached them. They had heard the remarks from them beforehand. Even Dash had to admit that they had showed great courage. She and her two companions stood before the Princesses, straight and still, meeting their gazes squarely.
"You three." Twilight said, narrowing her eyes. "You declared war and set out to takeover Equestria. You also would have assassinated us had Commander Fluttershy not stopped you."
"And you took Gummy!!!" Pinkie yelled indignantly, before nuzzling her returned pet.
"Exactly." Twilight said firmly. "That adds aligatornapping to your list of crimes."
"We were taking prisoners!!" Dash huffed. "But yeah, ok, I should have left him alone."
"Yes, you should." Twilight said. "You are all going to be severely dealt with. Severely ."
"Trixie does not like that idea." Trixie said. "But Trixie refuses to be sorry for any of her actions in this war."
"Yeah, I'm not sorry either!" Spike added boldly, only to cringe at the withering glare Twilight shot his way.
"Trixie and Spike, you two are sentenced to be executed," She said. "Unless, of course, you choose to denounce your actions against us and apologise."
"Ha! The Great and Powerful Trixie will never apologise!" Trixie announced. She waved a hoof. "Besides, even if Trixie wanted to apologise, she wouldn't. Not when her brave Second Greatest Assistant and her friends went so willing to their deaths. Trixie can do no less."
"Agreed!" Spike said. "They died bravely. As did my dear Rarity before them...though she died in battle, but she would have died just as bravely had she be executed, too! So I'm going to do the same!"
"Very well, then." Celestia spoke up. "You will be executed."
"Wait, what about me??" Dash demanded. "You can't execute my top officers and not me!!!" She was ignored as Starlight led the other two to the wall.
"It was a pleasure fighting alongside you." Spike told Trixie, extending a claw. Trixie accepted.
"Trixie was honored to fight with you as well." The pair glared at the waiting firing squad. Starlight choked back a laugh.
"Ready! Aim! FIRE!!"
Spike and Trixie were not going to be outdone by the deaths of the fillies. Spike let out a yell as he grabbed his chest with both claws and swayed.
"Gah...I'm...hit...ohhhhhh...." he fell to the ground and thrashed. "Can't...breathe...feel...life...slipping...uggggghhhh." He gave a gasp, and a jerk, then lay perfectly still. Trixie, however, did not die so easily. She screeched out as if in terrible pain and staggered around before falling to the ground.
"Oh curses! Oh ow! Oh darn! Trixie is finished! Her last act! Her greatest of great finales! The Great...and...Powerful Trixie...is...no...more!" She flailed and thrashed briefly, then flopped out on her belly and lay still, eyes shut. Starlight was shking with silent laughter as she levitated the two over to where she had put the Crusaders. Then she waited.
"General Dash." Twilight rose and stared down from the small platform at her friend. "You are hereby sentenced to go to the wall! Right now!" Dash winced.
"Ok, ok, I'm going!" She said, and went to stand where the others had stood seconds before. The firing squad had retreated, weapons lowered. "Hey, I thought you were executing me!"
"Oh no, Rainbow Dash." Twilight said ominously. "You are facing a far, far worse fate than death."
"Oh come on, Twilight!" Dash said. "What could possibly be worse than-" she broke off as she found herself staring down the barrel of Pinkie's biggest party canon. She shuddered. "Oh Sweet Celestia..." Pinkie Pie stood ready, hoof on the cord. Gummy was standing beside her. "Twilight!!! Just kill me!! Please!!! Don't do this!!! Just kill me!!"
"Nope." Twilight said.
"You really asked for this, you know." Starlight said. Dash gulped.
"Is this about Gummy?" She asked her grinning 'executioner'. "Because I'm really sorry I took him, war or not. Please, Pinkie, don't do this!"
"Ready..." Pinkie said.
"No, Pinkie, please!!"
"Aim..."
"Pinkie Pie, I swear i will never touch Gummy again! Please!!!" Pinkie gave a delighted grin.
"FIRE!!!"
BOOM!!!!
Dash's scream of protest was completely drowned out by the massive layer of cake batter, cookie dough, icing, ice cream, and whatever else that fell on her, obscuring her from view. Pinkie giggled gleefully.
"Mission Revenge accomplished!"
The massive ball of goo shuddered and heaved and Dash arose from its sticky depths, scowling.
"Somepony shoot me." She said. "Or I'm gonna start another war...with Pinkie!" Pinkie yelped and scrambled to safety with Gummy just as Starlight blasted Dash with a dose of magic that sent her tumbling back into the goo.
"Alright, everypony!" Twilight called. "I hereby declare this war, this trial and this court, over!" Cheers rang out as ponies settled to eat cake and talk about the fight. The Element bearers and their siblings sat together with Celestia and Luna.
"Excellent job dying, Sweetie." Rarity said. "I have never been more proud!" Sweetie Belle giggled.
"Ah'm sorry I fought against ya, sis." Apple Bloom said, looking at Applejack.
"Aw, thats ok, sugarcube!" Applejack said. "Next time, ya can fight on my side."
"This was so awesome!" Scootaloo said. "I totally want to do it again!"
"Me too!" Sweetie Belle agreed.
"Next year," Dash said as she joined them, still wiping icing off her muzzle. "The Rebels are taking Canterlot. And Equestria. We won't fail this time."
"Sure, Dash." Twilight smirked. "You won't succeed."
"Ha!" Dash said, in a tone of voice that said she accepted the challenge. She looked over at Fluttershy, who eeped. "I'm sorry I scared you with my threat, Flutters. It wasn't a serious one. I'd never hurt you. But still, I shouldn't have said it."
"Oh. Its ok, Rainbow Dash." Fluttershy said with a soft smile as she reached out to put a foreleg around her friend. "I know it was all part of the game, and you'd never hurt me."
"Really , Fluttershy??" Twilight said incredulously, one eyebrow arched. "Are you sure? Cause I swear I remember you hiding in the castle dining room. Under a table. With your animals."
"I was nervous." Fluttershy said, blushing. "And...and the animals...well..." Angel hopped up to her and scowled, as if daring her to continue. "Um, ok. Maybe I was scared. But...but I never did think Dash would really truly hurt me." Dash grinned.
"Good!" She said. "And by the way, Flutters, the way you took us down in the throne room? Totally awesome !!!" Fluttershy blushed again.
"The Great and Powerful Trixie was impressed." Trixie added.
"Yeah, that was so cool, Fluttershy!" Scootaloo piped up. The pegasus hid behind her mane at the praise.
"Next year, you're on my team, Shy!" Dash said.
"Ooh, can I be on your team again? Can I? Can I? Huh?" Pinkie bounced excitedly.
"Yeah, Dash. Take her." Applejack said. Dash smirked.
"Sure thing, Pinkie. But absolutely NO CUPCAKE HATS!!" Pinkie was so busy bouncing she missed that part. Everypony munched their cake and laughed and talked.
"I can't wait til next year!!" Pinkie squealed, echoing the sentiments of all of them. It would be fun.
"But next time..."Dash warned, all eyes on her as she spoke her dire prediction. "Next time, Equestria will be ours !"
Author's Note
Aaaand...that's a wrap! Lol.
Hope you guys enjoyed reading this chapter, and heck, the whole story. I know I enjoyed writing it. Lol.
Of All the Nerf!!! Part Two
"Alright, everypony. Glad you could make it today."
Twilight scanned the group of ponies seated at the long, retangular table. Princess Celestia and Princess Luna stood at one end; Twilight at the other. The ponies at the table were all the leaders and top officers of the previous year's Nerf War.
"We're all mighty interested in why ya called this here meetin', Twilight." Applejack said.
"To put it simply, this is a meeting to discuss this year's Nerf War." Twilight stated. "Notification arrived this morning that the Rebels have taken up arms again, only this time they plan to take not only Ponyville, but its surrounding areas and nieghboring towns. That includes Canterlot."
"Ya'll are gonna do WHAT?!" Applejack stared at Dash, who sat across from her. "Why in Tartarus are ya gonna take Canterlot??"
"Because." Dash said. "We are gonna overthrow the current rulers and take over Equestria."
"Now that just ain't nice." Applejack said. "The Rebels didn't do that when Ah was in charge!"
"Well, you aren't in charge this year, I am." Dash said. "We agreed to that last year. My side is the Rebels, your side is the Defenders."
"Ya'll already declared war?" Applejack asked.
"Nope." Dash said. "We're here today, my officers and I, to calmly discuss your peaceful surrender of all the towns you are in control of. And to discuss the surrender of the princesses."
"Yes, about that." Celestia chuckled. "General Rainbow Dash, I am afraid we will not be surrendering. You must either capture us or kill us."
"I was hoping you'd say that." Dash rose, smirking. "Allow me to inform you, we will show no mercy when we march on the towns and your castle, Celestia. No mercy whatsoever ."
"Yes, well, we shall take our chances, General Dash." Luna said, amused. "Just remember, you must successfully dethrone all three of us princesses. That includes Twilight."
"You mean egghead?" Dash snorted. "She'll be so buried in strategy books she'll never even see or hear us coming!"
"Hey!" Twilight said indignantly. "I'm standing right here! And I will definitely see you coming!! If you make it as far as Canterlot. But I doubt you will."
"Oh, we will." Dash said, glaring. "And you're the first one on my princess hit list!"
"Well, that's nice to know." Twilight said drily. "I'll be sure to add that fact to my to do list. 'Final task for today: get killed by Rainbow Dash.' You'll have to check it off for me, since I will be too dead to do so myself."
"Okay, time out, gals." Applejack butted in. "Save it for the battlefield. Pinkie Pie, we need some cupcakes for these two right now!" When there was no answer, Applejack looked around the table. "Oh horseapples. Where's Pinkie?!"
The door crashed open and in bounced Pinkie Pie, cupcake hat on her head, camouflaged uniform jacket on her body. She sproinged over to Dash and saluted.
"Commander Pinkie Pie at your service, General Dashie, Ma'am!"
"Not in this war, you aren't." Dash said. "You're in AJ's army."
For a moment, Pinkie looked crushed. Then she brightened and did a little bounce. She turned to Applejack and saluted.
"Commander Pinkie Pie and assistant Commander Cupcake at your service, General Applejack, Ma'am!"
"Commander who now?" Applejack asked.
"Cupcake!" Pinkie pointed at her hat. "He's my top assistant."
"Pinkie Pie, that there hat will get ya hit five minutes into the fight." Applejack said. "Better not wear it." Pinkie's blue eyes widened and her mouth turned into a frown.
"Aw, can't I wear it, Applejack? Please? I Pinkie promise not to let it get me hurt. Please???" She poked out her bottom lip and gave her new leader a sad look. Applejack couldn't resist.
"Alright." She agreed. "But ya be extra careful!"
"Yes, Ma'am!" And Pinkie hopped to her chair with a giggle. Dash looked at Applejack.
"Seriously??" She said. "You caved that fast?? Honestly, AJ!"
"If Pinkie wants to go into battle with a cupcake on her head, then she can." Applejack said.
"Great. But if I see that cupcake, I'm aiming at it!" Dash huffed.
"Ahem!" Twilight cleared her throat. "If we could return to the matter at hoof..."
"Right. War." Dash said. "What's left to say? The Rebels will be take over all the towns surrounding Canterlot, then we will march on Canterlot itself and take this castle. Applejack's side will try to stop us. That's that."
"Eeyup. Ah'd say that covers it." Applejack agreed.
"Alright then. Does anypony else want to say anything?" Twilight asked. A yellow hoof went up. "Fluttershy?"
"Um...I just...um...I really don't want to take over anything." Fluttershy said, with a nervous glance at Dash. "Um...I would rather defend Ponyville and um...Canterlot. Can I switch to Applejack's side?"
"What??!" Dash cried.
"Sure ya can, sugarcube!" Applejack said. Dash crossed her hooves and glared in bitter disappointment at Fluttershy.
"I can't believe you want to betray me like this, Captain Fluttershy. I am very not ok with it."
"Oh...I'm sorry...um, but I want to defend Ponyville, not attack it." Fluttershy said, flinching as Dash's glare intensified.
"Well, fine. Go ahead. But Fluttershy..." Dash leaned in, scowling. "I will not forget your treachery. And if you and I meet at any point during this war, I will end you . And I won't show mercy." She narrowed her eyes dangerously, leaning a little nearer. "You got that, Fluttershy ???"
"Eep!!" Fluttershy whimpered, cowering back from her ex-general.
"Rainbow Dash!" Rarity scolded from close by, scowling. "That's no way to treat dear Fluttershy! She is your friend!"
"Not anymore, she isn't." Dash said. "From now til the end of the war, she is my mortal enemy!" Fluttershy eeped again, realising just what predicament she'd gotten herself into. Dash was serious; she was going to end her. And probably slowly. She shuddered.
"Come to think of it," spoke up Starlight suddenly. "I'd like to defend Ponyville and Canterlot, too. Again."
"How dare you desert my army!" Dash said bitterly. "How can I manage with no magic expert?!"
"Oh, I've got you covered." Starlight smirked. "She wasn't around for the last battle, but, um, there is a Great and Powerful wanting to assist you, Dash." All eyes widened.
"Oh no." Dash said. "Please tell me it isn't Tr-"
"The Great and Powerful Trixie has arrived!" The yell was accompanied by a flash of smoke, which cleared to reveal the blue unicorn, smirking. "Trixie will be a Rebel Magic Expert!"
"Oh, wonderful !" Dash said drily. "I lose my first magic expert and wind up saddled with a crazy wannabe magician who probably can't even tie a knot in a rope with her magic!" Trixie smiled an evil smile. Her horn glowed, and a split second later Dash looked down to find herself tied to her chair with a securely knotted rope.
"You were saying?" Trixie said smugly. Dash strained and struggled to no avail. Finally she went limp and sighed.
"Fine. You're pretty good at magic. You're my new expert." She said. Her voice sharpened. "Now let me go !" Trixie obliged and Dash stood. Her eyes went to Twilight.
"As of now, we declare war on you. Prepare to be defeated."
"If you say so." Twilight said, with a nod. Dash huffed and motioned.
"Rebels! Lets move out!" As they headed out the door, she threw back a last threat. "We are going to destroy you!!"
"Good luck!" Applejack scoffed.
Dash growled and led her officers on the long march to headquarters.
The War would soon begin.
