Chapters The scroll had arrived early, just before sunrise. Even as tired as he was, Spike wasted no time in waking Twilight. He was sure that this sudden communication at such an early hour from the Princess meant that there was a threat of enormous magnitude befalling their fair land of Equestria.
"Twilight, wake up! We got a situation!" he said, frantically shoving the scroll repeatedly into her face. A second ago she was sleeping away the night peacefully but now she was nearly being suffocated in her own bed by a mere piece of parchment.
Her face recoiled in dismay, her muzzle scrunched up as if trying to flee the scene. But still her eyes were closed.
"Spike...what's going on?" she asked, slowly shaking her head.
"Something big! Well, maybe...but we got a letter from Celestia and it isn't even sunup yet." He tossed the paper toward her, gently smacking her in the horn.
Propping herself up on one hoof she finally opened her eyes enough to unfurl the scroll.
" 'My dearest student, I have an idea.' "
She narrowed her eyes and closed in on the paper's surface trying to glean more information. "What, is that all? W-what does that even mean?"
She looked at Spike for some semblance of an explanation. He merely shrugged. Seconds later while Twilight was busy examining the message, Spike suddenly belched out another letter. Twilight though, caught it mid-air with her magic before her scaly assistant could even begin to react.
Alicorn Sparkle, the Purple One, mumbled the contents of the newest note to herself. Then a look of sheer puzzlement dawned on her face. She reread this note as well just to be sure. Even going so far as to check the back and then douse it over with a spell to reveal any hidden writings, but none appeared.
"Well?" Spike asked.
"Uh,..." Twilight began, rubbing the sleep boogies from her eyes. "I g-guess we got some work to do?"
Several hours had passed since they received the bizarre communication from the Princess. Still, Twilight and Spike did all they could to fulfill her wishes, even if they didn't know just what the hay they were doing it all for. Twilight had spent the most of her morning overseeing the preparations while Spike busied himself with the thrilling task of rounding up Applejack, Rarity, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash.
Thankfully the bonds of friendship were strong enough between them for each of her friends to toss their own personal day plans out the window in favor of helping out their friend in need. Rarity was last to arrive. After half-an-hour of mulling over what outfit to bring to an occasion she knew utterly nothing about, she had settled on bringing a little of everything. Sweetie Belle on the other hoof was less than excited about being drug along just to lug all of her older sister's 'junk' around. At least she was being paid this time. Which in her mind just made her a glorified pack mule, an adorable one, but still.
Now they all stood assembled before a large object covered in a large sheet as to keep prying eyes from seeing the marvelous construction that was taking place underneath.
"Thank you all so much for coming!" Twilight beamed, stepping out from under the curtain as if she somehow could sense their presence. "Especially on such short notice. I really do appreciate this." She gave a slight bow of appreciation with her head.
"No problem Twilight, happy to help." Rainbow chimed in. "But could you tell us what's going on already?"
"Sorry, Rainbow." Twilight said before motioning to the rest of her friends "And to everypony else, I didn't mean to inconvenience you all."
"Nonsense darling." Rarity patted her little sibling on the head. "Sweetie Belle and I were just bored to tears at the Boutique trying to figure out what to do after breakfast. You know, for quality time together. Isn't that right Sweetie?"
Sweetie Belle couldn't have been more expressionless. "Yep, just bored to...tears."
Her left eye twitched slightly, signaling that her will to live had not left her just yet.
Twilight smiled brightly. She was filled with such feelings of pride for her friends willingness to help. "I understand that some of you might find this a bit odd. But firstly, let me absolutely assure you all that I am not joking around here in the slightest. Princess Celestia has chosen us as the subjects...or the administrators of an experiment that her no doubt brilliant mind has concocted!"
"An experiment?" Applejack interrupted.
"Yes, exactly." Twilight answered. "You see-"
Before she could finish something caught her eye.
Pinkie Pie, who up until now had been quietly eating on a batch of one dozen triple chocolate chip cupcakes opened her mouth. Pinkie's jaw held ajar for three whole seconds. Silence filled the air. Then without saying a word she picked up another cupcake and commenced slowly nibbling her way to it's chocolaty innards.
"If you don't hurry Twilight, it'll be closing time before long." said Spike.
"Right, sorry. As I was saying, Celestia has an experiment for us to run and that is...." She used her magic to fling the sheet off of the building. "For us to all work, for one day, at the Sunny Store!"
Behind her stood a hastily constructed but sturdy shopping complex. The top half of it's walls were decorated in yellow tile while the bottom was wrapped in a swirling wave design comprising of differing shades of orange. Unsurprisingly the roof tiles were all light red but what caught all their eyes was the giant sign out front bearing Celestia's full face and mane beside the Store's name. Though she did order the store built and owned it lock, stock and barrel.
"So, Celestia is opening a store?" Applejack scratched the back of her hat, confused. "...With us as the employees?!"
"W-What?" was all Rainbow Dash was able to mutter.
"I know isn't it exciting!" Twilight said, literally failing to contain her excitement as she did a little bounce.
"I know I'm excited." Sweetie deadpanned. Right before bursting into full blown smile.
Author's Note
Just a quick story I thought up after getting home from work. Haven't written in a while. Might do some more tomorrow.
The interior of the illustrious Sunny Store was spacious. Enough to house a dozen aisles of various pony products, a bakery, four check-out stands and two restrooms. It was not particularly cool but at least it was well-lit. Massive windows spanned the walls, letting in ample light.
Twilight cleared her throat to begin addressing her new recruits. "In short, Princess Celestia has asked us to run this store for her today. I have been placed in the position of acting Manager with Spike as my Assistant Manager."
She levitated over a stack of newly written employee manuals, handing them out to each pony as she went along, telling them of their new responsibilities. "Pinkie Pie, you will be in the bakery. Rainbow Dash you are in charge of stocking the shelves. Rarity will do the book-keeping and handle customer service. Applejack, you'll handle home-deliveries and general maintenance. And finally Fluttershy...you are the cashier."
She doled out that last role with a tinge of hesitance in her voice. And evidently rightly so as she bore witness to the pony once known as Fluttershy turn to goop.
"C-Cashier? As in the pony that has the most contact with other p-ponies?" she asked, quivering on the floor as she tried hiding behind her manual.
"Ehhhh..." Twilight gently whirled her head, buying time to think up a way she could make the job sound less intimidating to her. "Well, yes. But don't you worry Fluttershy. You'll have me and Spike here to help you if you have to many customers. All you have to do is place items in a bag and take bits. Oh and there is one other thing..."
"What?" Fluttershy asked, sounding a bit less frightened.
"You also have to make a little, teeny uh... boop noise every time you take an item off the conveyor belt and place it into a bag."
"A Boop?"
Twilight flipped open her thick 'Master Maual'. "According to Princess Celestia's wishes. She said to 'Please tell the cashier (Fluttershy) to make a small boop noise with her mouth every time she bags an item off the belt.' "
"I know it doesn't really make sense." Spike said. "But just roll with it, you'll do great!"
Fluttershy gulped, obviously still fearful. But she most definitely didn't want to disappoint her dear friend Twilight or Celestia. "O-Okay, I'll do m-my Best."
"Well my job looks super easy." boasted Rainbow Dash. "How hard can it be to put stuff on a shelf? With my speed, it'll be all too easy! Hello lotsa free time and sipping cider in the break room, yeah!"
"And I get to bake cookies!" shouted Pinkie. "Just leave it to me Captain Manager Twilight." After a split-second salute Pinkie disappeared to her station.
"Pinkie, don't forget to read your manual." Twilight called out. But she was far too late, she could already hear the sound of mixers coming from the bakery and see a light fog made of flour slowly envelope the area. "Well as everypony can see, this store already comes completely ready and stocked."
"Three, two and one..." Spike said, who had been on her back the whole time. "It's time to open up Twilight, it's noon."
"Oh? Thanks Spike. Okay, everypony please take your stations. I'll go unlock the front doors."
As Twilight cantered off to open the flood gates Sweetie Belle finished helping her sister Rarity into her 'store uniform'. Twilight hadn't issued any any store attire to them but Rarity saw it fit to make something more work appropriate. It wasn't her best work given such short notice but it would suit her needs for the day just fine.
The little Crusader pushed the entirety of Rarity's packed supplies into the already cramped Customer service booth. "Whew...you know what? Twilight seems to be taking all of this reeeaally well. Don't you think so, Rarity?"
Rarity trotted past, taking her place in the booth. "Now, now, dear. Don't mention it or we might see Twilight's head explode. Then Applejack would have to clean up the mess...and that wouldn't be very nice at all now, would it?"
Sweetie hung her head low. "I-I guess not..."
"Attention Sunny store staff!" Twilight announced, inserting the platinum key into the lock. "We are now officially open for business!" She unlocked the two glass front doors and flipped over the enormous closed sign to the side that read - open.
Then she pressed her face against the front window, eagerly awaiting her first customer to come strolling in. However none were even in sight yet.
"Pssstt...Applejack" Rarity motioned to her friend, making sure to keep her voice down. "Where is Fluttershy?"
"In the bathroom, I think?" came the reply. "She's pretty nervous, I-I'll go talk to her."
She didn’t waste a second, in through the door to the latrine she went. The thin door did little though to drown out her booming voice. “Hoo-wee, faaancy! Whadda ponies need such a highfalutin place like this to take care of their business? Makes no sense to me...”
"Ohh! Our first customer!" Twilight squealed with delight. "It's Mrs. Cake!"
Twilight herself opened the doors for her as the first potential patron of the day came in. "Hello and welcome to the Sunny store Mrs. Cake. We sincerely hope that you enjoy your shopping experience with us. As our very first customer may I present to you this coupon, good for twenty percent off your first purchase."
"My, well t-thank you Twilight. Where did all of this come from?" she asked as she took the offer.
"Well, Princess Celestia sent over a team of very skilled construction ponies, who had this place built in no time. Then she had another team fully stock this whole store full of all the goods we'd need. All in only a few hours, amazing really."
Mrs. Cake stood there nodding her noggin, surveying the layout of the store. "Is...is that a bakery?"
"Why yes it is, uh..." Twilight stopped when she notice her audience had pulled a Hoofdini on her. "W-Were did she go?"
"Upon yonder hill....Zzzzz." Spike half answered, sleeping soundly, nuzzled against her soft mane.
Mrs. Cake found herself drawn to the Bakery, it called to her. She could her somepony singing right along with their work behind the counter. It was a voice she could recognize in her sleep in a heartbeat. "Pinkie? Is that you?!"
"Huh? Oh Hi Mrs. Cake!" Pinkie said happily. Without even turning around she placed two large sheets full of sweet delights into the oven. Of course she could tell as well who was speaking to her by voice alone, given that they practically lived together.
Mrs. Cake took a gander at the prices, printed large and in charge upon the board overhead. "M-My, these sure are some low prices you got here. Only 3 bits for two dozen cookies?"
Pinkie came out to greet her friend, looking rather ghost-like due to all the flour and confectioners sugar coating her. "I know, isn't it great?"
"Uh, yeah...sure is." Mrs. cake gulped. "How are you able to make a profit on that?"
"Dunno..." Pinkie shook her mane, releasing a cloud of white. "It takes more than that just in ingredients to make em'. Though I do try not to question the low price of desserts or late night, feel-guilty-about-it-in-the-morning chocolate cake. You know?"
"But uh...how can Sugarcube Corner possibly hope to compete against this? Mr. Cake and I couldn't do it, we'd be forced out of business in no time. Pinkie how could you stand by and do this?"
"What?" Pinkie was baffled by the thoughts now swirling through her mind. "I-I'm not trying to force Sugarcube corner outta business. I would n-never-"
"So what will you do?" Mrs. Cake's tone wasn't taking this lightly in the slightest.
"I can't just change the prices but uh, maybe..."
Honestly Pinkie didn't really have a clue as to what she should do at first. Finally a thought did come to her. She hopped on the unicorn magic-powered string cup intercom. "Uh, Twilight could you come to the bakery for a sec? A customer isn't feeling to sunny about the Sunny store at the moment, heh heh."
"...Kinda busy right now Pinkie. Just a second! Rarity, can you possibly-" Twilight was interrupted mid-sentence by a tidal wave of tissue boxes burying her and muffling any further attempts at communication.
"No need, Pinkie. I'll just settle this matter with Celestia herself. I'll give her a piece of my mind." Mrs. Cake calmly and promptly left the premises. All attempts by Rarity and Pinkie to stop her from leaving, just to stay and talk it out fell on deaf ears. She blew right passed, ignoring all.
"Please wait! I'm sure we can come to an understanding." Rarity's still outstretched hoof barely made contact with the entrance doors surface as they swung back gently to a close. She lowered her limb and turned to Pinkie. "Well, so much for customer satisfaction."
"Did that seem kooky to you?" asked Pinkie. "Or do you think that was all completely justifiable?"
Sweetie Belle came into play, stroking her lower jaw as if a long beard was flowing off it. "Maybe it just comes with the territory? Ya know, build a store and cranky customers will come."
Pinkie squinted her eyes and began mimicking the young ponies movements. "I see, so if we build it, they will.... It is all becoming clear now."
"What is?" the two sisters asked in unison.
"Beats me, I was just saying stuff. Everything will be okay, you'll see." Pinkie poofed back to her normal self and bounced away. "La, de da, de da...weeeee!"
"Extra-soft, my hindquarters!" Twilight shouted in displeasure as she magically lifted the bulk of tissue boxes off of her. Spike however, remained sound asleep. The fall off her back onto the hard tile did little to disturb him, he was made from tougher stuff being a dragon and all.
"Whoever built this tissue display didn't do a very good job. I just picked one up to look at it and poof ...pain." She quickly reassembled the display properly, sorting by type and size. "Rainbow Dash, could you come here for a minute?!"
A multi-colored blur whizzed by too fast for mere pony eyes to behold. Seconds later Twilight received a tap on her shoulder from behind. "Whatcha need, Chief?" Rainbow asked, standing at attention.
"Aargh, don't do that!" Twilight visibly flinched in fear. She then shook her head wildly, trying to rustle up another excuse for her display that wasn't based on her being scared. "I'm uh...still tender from the um, avalanche of Celestia's Sun-Snooty tissues!" She pointed with her hoof to illustrate her point.
Without missing a beat, Rainbow fell over, consumed with joyous laughter. "Sun -What? Hahhahaha, I can't believe you just s-said that!"
Twilight picked up a box and held it in her hoof as she carefully examined the item. "What? What's so funny? That's what it's called."
Rainbow attempted to compose herself as Twilight went on. "Celestia herself, has chosen to market this product which is both named after her and sold in her store. We can't sell it properly to ponies if we ourselves don't believe in it and only see it as a joke. You just got to be able to look a customer dead in the eye and say, 'Celestia's Sun-Snooty tissues is a quality product!"
Spike, still asleep let loose a light chuckle. "Snooty, haha..."
Rainbow immediately bit her own lip, trying to keep away from the giggles. Tears visibly began to build up in her eyes.
Applejack trotted out of the bathroom. "Twilight, where's the supply room? We're out of Celestia's Sun-Booty paper in the stalls."
Rainbow's dam finally burst. Twilight sighed and face-hooved her forehead as she witnessed her star stock-pony collapse, crying joyous tears as she snickered.
"In the back AJ, they're in the back."
Applejack eyed Rainbow as she passed by. "What's so funny?"
"Don't ask, just...it'll only make it worse." The acting Alicorn Manager gingerly placed the tissue box back into it's assigned space in the display.
"Well, okaaay then." Applajack said, scurrying along toward her goal. "Oh and I think my talk with Fluttershy worked. She'll be out in a jiffy!"
"Rainbow..." Twilight's voice actually caught her friends attention. Dash still giggled a bit but at least she was looking in her direction now. "Okay, I'll be straight to the point. Even though you didn't build this display, you will be in charge of maintaining and building them in the future. So just be careful that they're built properly so they don't fall on and hurt ponies."
That last part sobered up Rainbow quite a bit. "I u-understand, Twilight. You can count on me!"
Twilight smiled. "Thank you. That's all I wanted, you can g-."
The image of Rainbow Dash quickly faded away as she zipped back to work.
"Well, I suppose that takes care of that." Twilight looked around the check-stand. "Where's Fluttershy?"
"P-Present." Came a tiny voice and hoof out from under the counter.
"There you are." Twilight went behind the counter to the employee area. "What are you doing? You can't exactly cashier from down there. The customers need to see you so they know where to go."
"I know Twilight, I'm sorry." Fluttershy said. "I don't want to let you down but maybe there is something else I can do to help the store?"
"Oh, Fluttershy, don't worry. Princess Celestia chose you for this important role. She believes in you and so do I. You can do this." Twilight levitated several objects off the shelf and placed them on the stand. "I'll be your first customer, so you can get in some practice. Then after that I'll be right here by your side until you feel confident enough to fly on your own. Does that sound okay to you?"
The yellow pony's ears perked slightly. "O-Okay, I guess that'll work."
"Great, now let me get into character." Twilight closed her eyes briefly, letting out a long breath before reopening them. "Hello there, nice to meet you!"
"...Um, hello?" Fluttershy answered, thoroughly confused.
"Pssst, I'm a customer ." Twilight gave a wink.
Fluttershy blinked several times over. "Oh? Oh! ...Why h-hello, it's nice to meet you too." she said weakly, avoiding eye contact. Right away she began busying herself with bagging each item and keeping a mental note of the total cost.
"Fluttershy... " Twilight whispered.
The shy little pony looked up from bagging without saying a word.
"Boop... " Twilight quietly breathed out the word from the side of her mouth.
"Boop?" Fluttershy echoed.
Miss Sparkle nodded strongly with affirmation. "Boop."
Fluttershy's eyes widened as if a great realization had come over her.
She reached out gracefully and gently touched the end of Twilight's nose. "Boop!" She smiled as she re-focused her attention on her bagging.
"Oh, darling!" Rarity called out from the customer service booth, having witnessed the whole exchange. "That's absolutely adorable!"
With understanding, Twilight patiently waited until Fluttershy was done bagging and announcing the price as being fourteen bits.
"You did a great job, Fluttershy! You were just as an employee of the Sunny Store should be. Hehe, though I was actually referring to the manual. Specifically the part where Celestia, for some reason, wanted you to make a boop noise as you bagged the groceries." she blushed lightly.
"Oh, my!" A tinge of scarlet filled Fluttershy's cheeks as well. "I'm sorry, I guess I just forgot."
"Sz'all good Flutters." Spike spoke up, sleep-talking as he snuggled Twilight's mane. "Boop-Snoot, hehe."
"Right, what Spike said." she teleported all items back to the shelf. "It's perfectly okay. It was just practice after all."
Just then Applejack came strolling by, carrying a load of bath tissue on her back. "Got all the Sunbutt paper we'll need right here! Go team Sunny Store!"
"Applejack! Is that anyway to speak of the Princess?" asked Twilight.
"What? That's what it's called ain't it?" She craned her head to examine the label. "Eh, close enough. Besides, I think Big Mac is ready to check out now."
"Wait, when did h-" Twilight turned to look but instantly smacked against the muscular physique of Big Macintosh, Applejack's older brother. "S-Sorry." she quickly apologized.
He merely nodded and placed his assortment of goods on the stand. His order was quite a load given how much he could carry without the aid of a cart. Soap, vegetables, donuts, peanuts, crackers, a dozen-layer cake and many other items had been collected.
Fluttershy sighed with relief. She was grateful that somepony she knew as well as Big Macintosh would be her first real customer of the day. Dutifully she picked up the first item and moved it to the bagging area. "Boop." She grabbed another. "Boop."
Twilight beamed with pride at her friend/employee's awesome performance. "Atta girl, Fluttershy." she thought.
Big Mac attentively watched as each item went through. He only diverted his eyes when she would speak. Slowly but surely he began to sway as he found himself entranced by her rhythmic voice. A smile came easily to him.
Twilight arched a brow. "Is he okay?"
"Boop...Boop...Boop." Fluttershy found herself grinning as well and waltzing along to his dance as she went on.
Each second she continued only heightened their joyous movement when suddenly Big Mac started to hum a song of sorts that perfectly highlighted her little tune.
"What is going on here?" Twilight thought aloud, finally waking up Spike.
The young dragon eyed the two frolicking ponies as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes. "Huh? Am I dreaming? ...Either way I don't care!" He jumped onto the little bit of free counter space he could find and joined the dance party. He busted out his full arsenal of sick moves. The Disco Point, Moon-Walk and his signature Mirror-Muscle Admiration.
Twilight used a bit of magic to pinch herself good and hard. "Ouch! Nope, not dreaming." She shrugged. "Got room for one more?"
Sweetie Belle took shelter behind Rarity's rear legs.
"Wha- Sweetie Belle what are you doing?"
"T-Twilight's dancing!" Sweetie covered her eyes with both of her hooves.
"Oh, is that all? Daaarliing , you've seen Twilight dance d-dozens...of..." Rarity bore witness to the party of four at check-stand two. "Hmm...yes I see. Spike's Mirror-Muscle Admiration move most certainly does not fit Twilight at all."
Rarity shrugged before returning to the book she was reading. "Eh, she's happy."
Author's Note
Small update to show you guys that this story isn't dead after all.
The Sunny Store had been practically dead ever since Big Macintosh had left the building. Scootaloo and Applebloom had been their only customers in the agonizingly slow two and a half hours that had passed since then. They had stopped by to chat a bit with their fellow Crusader Sweetie Belle and to buy some candy before heading home to commence pigging out.
Thankfully Applejack and Rainbow Dash had been there to witness the two young fillies struggle fruitlessly to push a cart loaded with a twelve foot tall stack of sweets in it. After a brisk but stern discussion on the importance of a healthy and balanced diet, the two little ponies ended up leaving, somewhat disappointed with only having fruit and peanut butter to sate their appetites.
Now that they had just left, Spike was bored out of his scaly little mind again and found entertainment in reading the packaging of various products. They weren't particularly interesting but they were better than nothing.
"Aha! Kidney beans, so we meet again ...for the twenty-seventh time today, apparently." Spike breathed out, bobbing his head to and fro. "This is getting ridiculous. I need another nap or I'm not gonna make it."
Twilight was nearby pulling items forward to the edge and utilizing a ruler to maintain even spacing. "Well maybe you would like to help me organize the pet food next?" Her ear perked, waiting for a response. "Uh, Spike?"
"ZzzzzzZzzz..." was her answer.
She gazed over to find that her dragon assistant had fallen asleep standing straight up, clutching the can of kidney beans. She admired his cute, puffy cheeks and twitching eyelids for a few seconds until the can snapped out of his grasp and hit the floor, breaking her focus.
"Well, I guess I'll take you to the manager's office, Spike. Nopony will bother you in there." Twilight noticed his form beginning to lilt backwards.
"I got you. " Twilight closed her eyes and smiled as she trotted over behind him, slightly bending her legs to catch his fall. "Now just lean back and..."
Whuump!
His rock-hard head collided roughly with the shelving in front of him, denting it slightly.
"Oooh , I'm sorry Spike but damage to company property is five bits out of your salary." Twilight chuckled as she levitated his slack body onto her back.
"We're getting paid?!" Pinkie's voice appeared from nowhere as she parted the cans on the shelf to reveal herself.
Twilight froze, squinting her eyes. "Pinkie how'd you get in there? And who's running the bakery for that matter?"
"Relax Twilight, I left Gummy in charge! Besides we haven't had a customer in hours!" Pinkie sprang from her hidey-hole simultaneously closing the gap in the beans she left. "So how much dough are we making? And I don't mean the baking kind! Though I really wouldn't mind getting paid in dough, especially if it's cookie dough!"
"Twelve bits per hour." said Twilight as she made her way to the door beside Rarity's service booth. "That's what you are all making. According to Celestia's wishes that is. Now if you'll please excuse me, I need to put Spike down for a nap." She popped open the door and walked into the darkly lit room.
"So why's it so dark in he-"
The door slammed behind her.
"Twilight, is that you?" A voice called out.
Twilight recognized it instantly. She bathed the room in the brilliant glow of her magic. "P-Princess Celestia?" She stood wide-eyed beholding her mentor, the ruler of Equestria.
"What's going on here?" Celestia asked. "What is this Sunny Store ? And why are you all a part of it?"
"I-I don't understand, what do you mean?" Twilight shifted nervously from hoof to hoof as she scanned the recesses of her mind trying to find an answer.
"It's okay, just start from the beginning." Celestia reassured her former student. Though the voice the Princess gave was soothing her demeanor was not. She paced back and forth wildly. "I just want to get to the bottom of this."
"Well..." Twilight pulled a piece of parchment from a stack on the nearby table. "It started this morning when I received this letter from you. I thought it strange but-"
Celestia magically grasped the paper herself. "So did this come through Spike?" She scanned over it's contents.
"Of course." Twilight gasped, realizing what Celestia's train of thought was. "You didn't send this note, did you? And it must be bad if-"
"If a secure magical connection like Spike has been compromised." Celestia finished, nodding. "That is the state of things. Whoever built this store...I'm sure they must have another motive other than tarnishing my reputation. Or gaining from it."
"What's happened? Something I don't know about?" Twilight stood up onto a chair in an attempt to make herself more or less at eye level with her fellow Alicorn.
"No, not much yet." Celestia placed the bit of paper back where it was procured from. "I had received a complaint from Ms. Cake about this establishment. It was then that I came here and saw all of this. I wasn't sure what to make of it all, so I took to asking somepony I trust...which is you."
"A complaint ?" Twilight erased the horrid managerial thought from her head. Now wasn't the time to be thinking like the head of a store. "Well, who could be capable of doing all of this? Who would have a reason to..."
Twilight and Celestia each narrowed their beady little eyes in agreement. "It's Discord..."
Celestia charged up her horn and unleashed a mass teleportation wave upon the Sunny Store, transporting all of it's staff to Fluttershy's cottage.
"Come on out Discord! I must know if it is you who is responsible!' Celestia stamped the ground beneath her hooves, snapping Tabitha the Twig in two.
"Um, he doesn't...live with me anymore." Flutteshy said barely above a whisper. "Also what's going on?"
Her tiny squeaks were drowned out in no time by Applejack. "What in tarnation is going on here, Twilight?!" She turned briefly to Rarity who was a shaky mess of crossed hooves and dribbling sweat. "Cuz' I think maybe somepony was in the middle of doing their business before all this happened."
"Oh, my! Would you please excuse me?" Rarity made a mad dash over to a giant bush in the forest nearby. "I'll just be over here doing something! Nopony come over!"
"Sorry, Rarity!" Twilight called out after her running friend. "Now as for everypony else, I think you should all know something. Celestia never did send a letter to me asking us all to run a store for her. We believe it all to be Discord's doing."
"Really, Celestia?" Discord materialized before them. "I expect this kind of behavior from Twilight, not you."
"Let me get this straight." He inhaled a deep breath. "So someone hijacks your dragon network and erects a pony Princess themed grocery outlet in Ponyville with your precious Element bearers as the employees and the first one you think to blame is ME?!"
"That's a mouthful!" chimed in Pinkie.
"So you mean to say that it wasn't you?" Celestia asked, looking away from his gaze.
"Correct, my dear!" He blew confetti out both his nostrils. "I may be quite the rapscallion but a mock store is beneath my talents. You figured that out though and that is why you are the pony in charge. Why with wits like yours, it's no wonder you're the one chosen to wear the big wig in Canterlot."
He leaned passed her to address the ponies behind her in a whisper. "Seriously, it's a big wig." With his hands he motioned outward from his noggin to emphasize the hairpiece's enormity.
Celestia tapped the back of his shoulder to get his attention. "So if you didn't do any of this, who did?" Furthermore, can I count on your he-" she stopped suddenly, eyeing Pinkie Pie and Sweetie Belle who both stood transfixed by the top of her head. "What?" The stares continued even as their eyes grew, filled with undeniable wonder.
"Seriously? I guarantee I do not wear a wig! This magically flowing mane of mine is one-hundred percent real!"
"Oh, is that so?" Discord poofed a skin-tight steel shell around Celestia's body, immobilizing her. "Then you wouldn't mind if we just see for ourselves then would you?"
Rarity parted the branches of her makeshift wilderness latrine and trotted out to once again join the others. "Ah, much better. Now to see what all this fuss is about."
Using her magic she popped in her brush and began cleansing her mane and tail of the forest's debris. "Who knew that one could get so dirty just from-"
She dropped her brush when she came upon the sight of Pinkie, Discord and even her own sister Sweetie Belle all poking and prodding gleefully at Celestia's multi-colored hairline. "Good heavens, Sweetie! What are you doing to Celestia?"
"Relax." With a simple snap, Discord released his captive. "Sweetie Belle was merely helping me with some valuable research. I think we all owe it to the ponies of Equestria to explore the possibility of Celestia's hair being just as fake as your's."
Rarity gasped at the flagrant accusation. "Why of all the silly-" She gently smacked Sweetie Belles hoof away as it crept closer to touch her mane. "Don't even think about it, Sweetie. Just don't..."
Rainbow Dash swooped over and gathered up the young Crusader, taking her over to Applejack's side. Probably for the best given that the little filly still eager to test the authenticity of her sister's mane.
"Soon..." Sweetie's eyes widened at her thought.
Applejack moved out in front of the group to stand side by side with Celestia. "Okay now, we're all getting distracted. We still gotta figure out who is behind this here mess."
All at once it got dark. As all the ponies gazed up at the skies, confirming the sun's disappearance, Twilight looked to her mentor for answers.
"That wasn't me, Twilight. Luna must be up now, I left a note explaining I'd be gone for a bit. I must have lost track of the time and she got impatient with me. Or something else, because isn't it still too early for this? "
Soon light returned to the land, as the moon rose above the horizon to fill the night sky.
Discord wrapped his arm around Celestia. "Well I for one have an idea of who to look to next for answers."
"Luna would never, Discord."
"We'll see, Princess. We will see..."
