Onii-Chan's Interesting Life

by MrWriterWriter

Rating: everyone
Tags: Slice of Life, Human, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Comedy, Other, Equestria Girls, Main 7 (EqG), Random
Length: 13293

Spike juggles big brotherhood and being a cuddle-magnet.

Spike figured things would be routine once he moved out; a job, home, relax, bed, rinse and repeat.

That is, until he somehow became the adopted older brother to a rambunctious group of little girls...all of them with a habit of calling him by 'Onii-chan', but that's not so bad, right? And he managed to get hold of a place big enough for them all.

Now if only he could figure out where these small technicolor horses keep coming from...

And why they're so cuddle hungry.

Published 2018-10-11 16:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2024-12-15 03:25:30 UTC

Intruder

"So, let me make sure I heard that right. You girls were at recess when some of the supposed 'cool kids' start trying to pick on you for being the new kids?" Spike asked, recalling what he managed to get out from them amidst the flurry of chatter when they got back in the car.

"Well, when they heard we lived with you, they tried to call you a 'sissy' for living with a bunch of girls." Pinkie answered him. "Kinda rich from that kid, since he had on a bright 'fishya' shirt on."

"'Fuscha', Pinkie." Rarity corrected her. "But you're right about that." She shuddered. "No sane person would willingly wear that...color!"

"Ugly shirt aside, that got Rainbow and AJ miffed enough to get in their faces and call them 'stinky punks'" Twilight added.

Spike had to slow down for a moment when he snorted at that. He knew he probably shouldn't encourage stuff like that, but it was still pretty funny. He had enough trouble with a couple of his nosier coworkers making it clear they didn't think a twenty year old male could be trusted with looking after ten little girls. "So, do I want to know what happened next."

"One got mad and tried to hit Fluttershy....Twilight put him in that arm hold we saw in that movie!" Rainbow patted said gal on the shoulder, who was blushing up a storm behind her glasses.

This time Spike busted out laughing. "You put a one in a Kimura!? HAHAHA!!"

"It was the first thing that came to mind..." Twilight responded sheepishly.

"Soon as she put him in it, his buddies ran off an' she held it 'till he started cryin' 'uncle'!" Applejack finished, making him laugh more.

"Any other interesting events happen for you lot?" He asked once he settled down.

The rest of the trip home was filled with remarks about a teacher who, for some reason, was annoyed by Apple Bloom's hairbow, Rainbow's annoyance at learning that she couldn't try for junior soccer until she'd been there at least a month and made a 'B' average, and Pinkie being disappointed that lunch was plain hamburgers.

Soon they made it home and the whole crew headed inside. "Ok, put everything up and I'll work on dinner here in a little while." He stopped. "On second thought, since this was your first day, who's up for pizza tonight?" A mass 'YAY!' was his answer.

"Niichan, you missed a glass!" Scootaloo called out from the living room, pointing to one of the big mugs he used for floats sitting on the coffee table.

"But I'm sure I caught everything." He said, looking at it. A bit of milk was inside, and beside it sat a saucer with what looked like cookie crumbs. That quickly raised up an alarm. 'Wait a second! This table was clear this morning...' "None of you ate any cookies this morning, did you? Before we left?"

"No./Ah didn't./Not me./ Uh-uh." Came the replies.

"Oniichan...!" Rainbow called out, worry in her voice. "The tv...it's warm!"

"And the wemote's on the floor. You said nevah do that!" Sweetie added, pointing to where the device lay, beside the floor lamp nearby.

Spike's eyes widened. "Applejack! Sunset! Get the others and get them outside! HURRY!" Luckily, they were all still downstairs, so it only took a few seconds. He handed Rarity his phone. "If you don't see me back out in ten minutes, call the police, got it?"

"O-ok." She nodded, as visibly scared as the others. As soon as they were out, he shut the door and rushed to his room. When he was picked to look after the girls, he'd been surprised and more than a little panicky about it, considering his old apartment was barely enough for himself.

Thankfully, he'd been able to pool what cash he had and, whether by sheer luck or good timing, managed to buy their current house for surprisingly cheap. Whoever had owned it before them was a bit of a collector, since he found a fair bit of odds and ends in the basement and attic. Since they were never claimed, he was able to sell a few things in order to shore up funds.

A few pieces, however, he kept. One particular item was tucked up under his mattress. An old short sword. It was dull and pitted from neglect, but it was solid enough to knock someone silly. He also made his way back to the kitchen and got a wrapped up object off the top cabinet shelf.

Taking the cloth off revealed Skinner, his grandmother's beloved bowie knife; fifteen inches of razor-sharp steel with a moose antler handle. Damn thing was almost a short sword itself.

Wielding both, he edged down the hallway, keeping his back to the wall the whole way. The short sword was out in front, showing he was armed, while Skinner was hidden against the back of his other arm, just in case more...drastic action was required. Any door was checked to see if it was still shut, figuring if someone was here to steal something, they'd be too concerned with getting what they wanted to worry about that.

A look at the nearby clock told him he still had about four minutes left. The only place left to check on the bottom floor was the room he and the girls used for when they wanted to build the occasional model. He started towards the door when something popped up out of the corner of his eye.

Two somethings actually.

Two rather small somethings...rounding the corner. That stopped when he saw them, and vice versa.

Spike stared blankly, wondering what the heck he ate that was making him see what he was seeing.

"Howdy!"

"Hi!"

It didn't really help when the two small somethings spoke.

Ponies??

Throughout his life, Spike had asked himself several questions when he was caught off-guard; 'Wasn't that window open?'

'What twisted monster thought letters in a math problem was a good idea!?'

'I'm a foster what now?'

One such question was rolling through his head: 'Did one of those jackasses slip something into my lunch!?' Namely because of what he was seeing. Standing less than ten feet away (at least, he thought they were standing) were two ponies.

Two small, oddly colored, ponies. One was orange, and bizarrely enough, a hat and hair(mane?)style that was almost identical to Applejack's. The other was pink, and a mane that was a dead ringer for Pinkie's hair. And both were the size of a month-old puppy.

"What in the....?" He asked no one in particular, rubbing his eyes.

"What, ain't ya'll ever seen a pony before?" The orange asked, with a voice that sounded just like an older Applejack.

"Of course I have!" He replied. "But not ones as tiny as you! Heck, newborn foals are bigger..." He stopped. "i...I gotta be seeing things. I'm arguing with a tiny talking horse."

"Pony, actually!" The pink one joined in, complete with an older Pinkie's voice, before it belched.

"Pinkie!" The orange one scolded it.

"Sorry. Those cookies were good."

Spike was in the middle of trying to figure out what was going on when he heard that. "Wait. Cookies?" He looked at the pink one. "You're the one who left that plate and glass out on the table?" He asked, all traces of confusion gone and replaced with annoyance. "I HATE it when people do that! It always leaves me with a bigger mess to worry about....and I'm doing it again..."

"See, Pinkie?" The orange one spoke up again. "Ah told ya whoever lived here was gonna be annoyed if ya did that."

"Hehe...whoopsie? Ooh! I know what'll cheer him up!"

"How can ya tell that's a...Pinkie!" Spike found himself forced to drop both blades when the 'Pinkie' pony suddenly bounded up and leaped at him, wrapping its...or apparently, her front legs around his neck in a hug, with him catching her on reflex.

"Pinkie hug!" She squealed, nuzzling him in the process. "Wow, you're warm!" She giggled. "AJ, you gotta try this!"

"Pinkie, ya can't just go 'round huggin' complete strangers...though, Ah admit that does look kinda fun...an' Ah could use a cuddle right 'bout now-scoot over!" Spike soon found himself holding both while they buried their faces in his collarbone.

'H-holy crap...!' He thought, reality hitting him when he felt the surprisingly soft fur on his neck. "You...you're real??"

"Feels real to me!" The one calling herself 'Pinkie' chirped, purring as she curled up closer.

"Oni-chan!" Sunset's voice suddenly called out, followed by rapid footsteps.

"S-Sunset!?" He replied, remembering about the knife and sword and moving to kick them into the room before she saw them. "I told you all to stay outside!"

"When you didn't come out, we tried to call like you said, but it slipped out of Rarity's hand and we couldn't get it to turn back on!" She sounded like she was about to cry by the time she rounded the corner, coming to a stop at the bend. "We started to panic and I ran in..." She trailed off when she spotted the orange and pink cuddlers. "O-Oni-chan...what are those??" Her expression quickly brightened. "Are those puppies!?"

"Hi!" 'Pinkie' waved, looking over at her.

"Did...did it just...?"

Spike sighed. "Um, Sunny...go tell the others they can come back in." He glanced down at the two diminutive ponies still hugging him. " And have them all wait for me in the living room. Dunno why, but I have a feeling things are gonna get a bit...peculiar around here."

It didn't take long for them to regroup back inside, coupled with a definite sense of relief, and all ten huddled up on the couch by the time Spike got back. The two ponies - who'd introduced themselves as Pinkie Pie and Applejack, which weirded him out even more than the resemblance they had to the two girls - were curled up on his shoulders.

As soon as they saw them, the girls erupted.

"Puppies!? *SQUEE!*"

"Oh, their ADORABLE!"

"Where'd you find them, Onii-chan?"

"Why are they orange an'... an' pink?"

"Ok, ok. Settle down, all off you." He waited for them to all quiet down, setting the ponies down on the coffee table. "First of...I found our 'intruders'." He looked at the two as he said the word. "Girls, say hello to....pony AppleJack, and pony Pinkie Pie."

"Come again/Say what?" The two girls with the same names said in unison.

"AJ, check it out!" Pony Pinkie pointed at them. "They look like us!"

Silence reigned when that happened.

"Uh, yeah...girls, these are ponies" He was greeted by ten expressions of disbelief. "Yeah, I thought I'd eaten something off during lunch today when I saw them, but...yeah. These two are small, brightly colored ponies. And as you just saw, yes, they can talk. Say hello to Applejack..."

"Howdy!" The pony sat proudly.

"It..." Twilight started

"Pardon, Ah'm a mare!"

"Oh, s-sorry...she..." Twilight leaned in a bit. "She's got freckles likes yours AJ!"

"This is actually kinda cool." Rainbow commented. "Really weird, but cool."

"Right. And Pinkie." He barely finished before the girl with the same name was kneeling at the table, looking at her pony counterpart.

"Her hair looks like mine!" They said in unison. "Jinx!" The two descended in giggles after that.

"Well, they certainly seem alike." Rarity spoke up. "Um. I do have a question, though."

"Me too. Several, actually." Twilight said, pulling a notepad out of her pocket.

"Huh...we probably better bring the others if they got as many questions as Ah think we're gonna get." 'Pony' Applejack said, looking up at Spike.

"Others?" He blinked. "There are more of you?"

In answer, she just hollered. "Alright, guys! Ya'll can come out!"

Spike and the girls just watched while several other puppy-sized ponies, all of them with unusually colored coats and manes matching the other girls, came squirming and hopping out of hiding places around the ground floor to trot their way. Three even came buzzing down from the rafters!

As the technicolor puffballs came scampering into the open, only one thing came to mind for him: 'Why do I have the feeling my life just got a bit more cuter and complicated?'

Gonna need more beds.

Spike ran a hand through his hair at the sight before him. Less than five minutes ago, he'd gone from thinking that someone had broken into his house, only to learn that he had a group of brightly colored, sapient, and ridiculously tiny, ponies living there.

Now, that would bizarre enough in itself...except that...well, they were all pony versions of the girls, even with the same name, for crying out loud! Seriously, all ten girls were currently huddled up on the couch, each one with her pony counterpart.

"Ok..." He spoke up, getting their attention. "While I admit this scene is freaking adorable, I think there's a few things me and the girls are curious about."

"Onii-chan has a point." Twilight spoke up, watching her pony self levitate one of her school books. "Where did you come from?"

"We don' know." 'pony' Apple Bloom responded.

"'Don't know'...? W-what do you mean?" Spike asked.

'Pony' Rainbow buzzed around his head. "We don't know or don't remember. All I know is we all woke up in some kinda big box."

"Wait, someone left you in a box, the basement here!?" Spike wasn't sure if he should be ticked off or alarmed while the girls were just plain angry that someone would lock up the ponies up like that.

"I'm afraid we have no idea how long we'd been in there, darling." 'pony' Rarity answered him. "None of us seemed injured in any way, though it did take a little effort to untangle ourselves."

"Once we got out, we learned that we were in the basement of this place." 'pony' Twilight added, hopping in her counterpart's lap. "To be honest, it was more than a little creepy, given that we had no idea where we were or how to get out. At least, until our Fluttershy saw you come in."

"Wait, all the scuffling I heard that day was all of you?" He asked. "I thought mice or something had gotten inside."

"W-we're sorry about any trouble we might've caused, but we didn't know who or...or what you were at first." 'pony' Fluttershy spoke up, snuggled up in her counterpart's lap.

"Fair point. But, how long...I mean, one of us was bound to see you walking around."

"Week or two maybe." 'pony' Sunset answered. "We'd usually wait till all of you were asleep or had gone out and do a little exploring."

"Luckily there's an old apple tree in yer backyard - ya'll really should get that looked at, it's kinda sickly." 'pony'Applejack pointed out. "An' we could get to the sink. Of course, some of us..." She glared mildly at 'pony'Rainbow and Pinkie. "Couldn't resist raidin' the fridge fer leftovers."

"Like you're one to talk, AJ." 'pony'Rainbow retorted, crossing her front hooves. "Even you got tired of those apples."

"So that's what happened to that old carrot cake in there." Twilight mumbled.

'pony' Rarity was the next to talk. "Once we learned the layout of this place, and found a few hiding spots, we felt a bit more comfortable coming out in the daytime for...I guess 'checking all of you out' would be the best term."

"Wait a sec!" Applejack held up her pony counterpart, looking her in the eye. "You mean any of us could've been walkin' right by one of ya'll these last few days, an' we didn't even notice??"

"Well, we can be pretty quiet when necessary, and there are quite a few areas we can duck into." 'pony' Twilight chuckled lightly. "And after what we saw in the last couple of days, I'd say we made a good choice on finally coming out."

"What d-do you mean?" Fluttershy asked.

"Like when Human Rainbow skinned her knee. Thankfully, the window was open and we could hear."

Rainbow grit her teeth a little as she held onto her bleeding knee. She'd been running to catch up with her soccer ball when she tripped and hit her knee on a sharp rock. She could feel her eyes welling up, but she was tough! She wasn't going to cry! But, it hurt...really bad!

"Dash!" Spike's yell caused her to look up in time to see her 'onii-chan' come skidding up to her. "What happened!?"

"I-I tripped..." She said, trying to fight back the whimper in her voice. "It...it hurts!"

"Hey, it's gonna be ok, Dashie. I got ya" He said softly, wiping off a tear that'd started to run. "Here, let me check." She let him move her hands away too see the cut. "Ouch...looks like you landed hard." He gently picked her up and started towards the house. "Come on, let's get you cleaned up and bandage that."

"Wait, my soccer ball..."

"I'll get it after we take care of your knee, don't worry." With that, he carried her back inside.

"And that kiss on the forehead after you treated it...I..." 'pony Fluttershy and Rarity both let out an adorable 'squee'.

"Dashie, you told the rest of us it was just a scrape!" Pinkie piped up.

Rainbow flushed a little. "It w-wasn't that bad..." She moved her skirt to try and cover the bandage.

"Rainbow, you're nine. You don't have to try and act tough all the time." Spike gave her a look, smiling a little as he did.

She didn't respond, though her cheeks pinked.

"Ooh-ooh-ooh!" 'pony' Pinkie bounced around between the girls. "What about during that thunderstorm the other day?"

" Ok, girls, sleep tight. I'll see you in the morning." Spike said, kissing the last one good night.

"Night, Onii-chan." They said in unison. Well, except for one.

"O-Onii-chan...?" Twilight piped up, still curled up under her blankets. "Um...c-could you...read me a bedtime story?"

"Well..." He started.

"A bedtime story? Ooh! Me too!" Pinkie chirped.

"U-us too, Onii-chan?" Sweetie and Fluttershy joined in.

"Ok, ok." Spike relented. "Let's see what I can find." He headed over to the book shelves that held the ones they all tended to like and started rifling through the books. "Ok...too late for that one...this one'll keep all of you up..."

*CRACK-BOOM!*

He started a little at the sudden noise, coupled with Fluttershy's squeak of fear. A few moments a flash came through the window, followed by another loud boom, this time loud enough to startle even Sunset and Applejack. He peered out to see a curtain of rain coming their way. "Hoo-boy. 'Fraid we got a big storm coming in, girls..." He trailed off at the various gulps, whimpers, and other noises of fear the girls let out at that. Scootaloo had squirmed up close to Rainbow, and AJ was trying to console Apple Bloom, who looked close to crying as another boom hit, making the house feel like it was shaking a little

"Here we go." He pulled out a slightly thick, leatherbound book. "How's The Hobbit sound?" He moved over to Twilight's bed and sat on the edge. Next thing he knew all of them had cuddled up around him; Pinkie latched onto his back, Rarity and Bloom had claimed his lap, and the others were all scrunched up on either side. "Ready?" He cleared his throat and started. "In a hole in the ground, there lived a Hobbit..."

"Yeah, heh. That's kind of one of our 'neverending' stories."

"Neverending?" 'pony' Sunset tilted her head in confusion.

"'Cause none of them are awake before the end." He snickered some at the indignant squeak the girls let out at that. "Well, you do. Had to tuck all of you back in before the fourth chapter."

"Anyway, that kinda showed us what kinda stallion-I mean guy, you are." 'pony' Twilight finished.

"Pretty much just doing what I figured was a decent way to look after them." He replied, before bringing up something that just occurred to him. "So, what are you ponies gonna do now?"

"Not real sure." She sighed. "We have no idea how to get back home."

"Or even what 'home' is, to be honest." 'pony' Sweetie added, ears drooping as her counterpart hugged her.

Spike watched in silence as the girls all cuddled the ponies, doing their best to comfort them some. "Gonna have to find some more beds than, aren't I?"

"Oniii-chan?" Pinkie looked up at him, surprise on her face. "You mean..?"

"I mean, I not gonna throw them out. Come on, you guys know me better than--hoog!" He was cut off as the wind was knocked out of him by a twenty girl/pony mass glomp. "I'll...take that as a sign of approval." He wheezed from under the hugging mass.

Interlude: Party Invitations

"Six, five, four, try to be the first out the door." Spike listened as the girls and ponies made up rhymes as they jumped rope out in the yard. Or, some of them were, to be more specific. Both Rarities weren't too keen on getting dirty from the start, Sweetie decided to just watch with her pony counterpart napping in her lap. Scootaloo and Apple Bloom, being the youngest, were the first to get winded. Fluttershy couldn't keep up either, while 'pony' Shy wanted to just watch as well, and both Twilights tried, only to wore out after a short minutes. 'pony' Apple Bloom gave a good show, but soon joined them with 'pony' Scootaloo right behind her.

"Well, looks like you've all settled in pretty good." Spike commented, watching Rainbow stagger out of the way, winded from trying to jump too hard, 'pony' Rainbow following shortly after. It'd been a week since the ponies had made themselves known, and they'd managed to fit in fairly well; the girls were pretty happy about it too. Spike on the other hand, was a tad worried about how others would respond. After all, small, multicolored, talking ponies aren't exactly commonplace in their world.

Thankfully, the house was isolated just enough to keep from worrying about any unwanted attention. And he was able to get across that there were others who wouldn't quite be as accepting to the ponies existence; at best they'd be ignored as hallucinations, at worst...seen as potential experiments. So, they'd have to be careful if they did let anyone else in on the secret.

"Kinda, this place is pretty big." 'pony' Twilight replied, looking back at the house and yard while 'pony' Sunset finally relented.

"Yeah, it kinda sizable. The whole property covers two acres. There's still a couple corners I haven't checked out."

"Hm...a foot in human terms is equal to about two pony lengths, give or take a centimeter..." The pint-sized mare did some calculations and whistled. "That...that's a long way in pony terms"

" Yeah. I'm considering making a roofed area off the backdoor so the girls can play some outside while it's raining." He chuckled when Applejack, pony then girl, finally surrendered, Sunset giving up a couple minutes later, leaving the two Pinkies facing off. "Ten kids cooped up indoors can be a handful sometimes. Add a band of ponies, some with a knack for being rambunctious as well..." 'pony' Twilight blushed a little at that.

"Um...Twilight?" Spike asked, watching the two Pinkies jumping rope. "When did your Pinkie get a pony-sized jump rope?"

"It's Pinkie. You're better off not questioning it." 'pony' Twilight responded, slightly deadpan.

"Oh..." He sent a worried glance over to his Pinkie, who was trying to find a rhyme for 'marmoset'.

'pony' Twilight put a reassuring hoof on his knee. "Don't worry; she doesn't seem to have the same abilities as ours. "

"Oh thank god..." He whispered.

"At least, not outside having a similar train of thought."

"Right."

The stand-off continued for another twenty minutes before they both called it a draw. Spike had to carry them back in due to being too wore out to walk. "All right, the lot of you can relax and I'll go make lunch." He said after putting them on the couch.

"Heh, *pant* that's a personal record." Pinkie said, letting out a little wheezing laugh.

"Woo, can't feet my hooves." 'pony' Pinkie chuckled, laying on her back and waving her legs around.

Heading to the kitchen, Spike noticed a piece of paper on the table. Several, in fact. "What's this? Girls, any of you leave your homework in here?"

"Ah didn't."

"Nope!"

"No, Onii-chan."

"Already did mine."

As the responses came, he looked at them. Turned out it wasn't homework, since every sheet said the same thing. "Halloween Party?"

"Oh! I knew we forgot something!" Twilight squeaked. "The teachers gave us those yesterday; there's a party scheduled next week and they're asking if parents are willing to bring snacks and stuff for it. That's the permission slip and a thing to list what you'd be up for bringing."

Spike looked over the suggested items. "Drinks, paper plates, cups, munchies. Doesn't seem too bad. Are they wanting store bought or made?"

"They didn't say. Though we heard one kid's parents tried to make it tofu and veggie platters only..." Rainbow scowled a little. "That's like getting a pencil when you go trick-or-treating!"

Spike cringed a little at that. "Ugh...! Well, thankfully, I can rectify that." He checked the slips again. "Costume contest too, huh?"

"Yeah, they said there'll be one for each grade, and the parents, if any come wearing one." Sunset replied.

"All right. We'll go costume hunting tomorrow."

"Kinda sounds like you guys have a Nightmare Night here too." 'pony' Scootaloo noted.

"Wazzat?" Sweetie asked, before Rarity chided her for not using proper English.

"It's a reeely scary night where ponies dress up and go door-to-door for lots of candy!" 'pony' Pinkie chirped, back to her bouncy self.

"Yep, same here. Though we call it Halloween." Applejack replied. "Dunno why, but there ya go."

"Wait, if-if we go, then what...what about the ponies?" Fluttershy looked around. "It doesn't...it doesn't seem fair to leave them at home if we go."

Spike glanced back at them. 'She's got a point.' He gave the group calculating look. 'Maybe...' "I think I might be able to come up with something." He said. "Provided you don't mind playing pretend."

Author's Note

Think you can guess what they'll be dressed as?

Party Time

They did the Mash! They did the Monster Mash

Glad no one could see his eyes thanks to the mask, Spike rolled his eyes a little at the music. He knew this particular party was for Kindergarten to Third Grade, and Fourth/Fifth Grade had theirs in another part of the school, but he'd always thought this song was cheesy. The girls all looked to be having fun, though, so he could bear it.

Seeing a couple of Third Graders looking at him, and the fact he could hear them trying to guess what he was, he decided to have a little fun.

"Why's all that stuff on the top hat? He's got a couple wrenches and a key on it...it even looks like it's been bolted together!"

"I dunno, but the black tie and tails look cool."

They froze as he looked right at them while adjusting the larger lens on his mask, then he grinned and started turning the little wind-up key on the side. It was just for show, but the rapid clicking it made definitely made them back up a little. He chuckled a little before going back to looking around. Luckily, from his vantage point he could see all the girls.

Both Applejacks, dressed as werewolves, were preoccupied with trying to out-apple bob a vampire Rainbow Dash with 'pony'Rainbow on her shoulder as a little bat. Twilight was watching them and trying to keep the oversized witches hat of her costume from engulfing her head while her own counterpart was peeking out from a pouch, dressed in her own black cat outfit.

Scootaloo, in her knight outfit, complete with 'pony'Scootaloo on her shoulder as a little dragon, was at the food, looking horrified at the anchovy and pineapple pizza someone had brought in. Both Sweeties, one in a kitty cat costume, the other as a yarn ball in her apron, were trying to snap her out of it. Though, it didn't help that 'scarecrow' Apple Bloom, along with a couple of girls they'd made friends with; Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon, if he remembered right...were halfway though the pizza. The little crow Bloom with her didn't seem to agree, though.

Rarity, in her angel costume, was helping her cherub get her wings on straight without messing up her mane, with a panda/ninja Sunset combo chatting nearby while no one was looking. And twin pumpkin Pinkies were happily sampling some of the flavored marshmallows one of the parents had brought.

He was in the middle of getting a few chips and some cola when Fluttershy, dressed as a game/comic character called Flandre Scarlet and carrying 'pony'Shy in a Mokona costume, gently tugged his coat with her free hand. "Onii-chan? What's Karry-yokey?"

Spike lifted his mask a little. "Carry...? Oh, karaoke. um, it's basically singing for rookies. Pick your song and let 'er rip. Why?"

"We overheard one of the teachers say it's almost time for the 'Karaok-off'." 'pony'Fluttershy replied. "They're going to let the parents try their hand at singing to win a prize."

"Are you gonna go for it, Onii-chan?" Pinkie asked, somehow appearing beside them, and making Fluttershy jump 'eep' loudly.

'Mental note, put a bell on that girl soon.' Spike told himself after catching Fluttershy. "Maybe, though I'm not exactly a singer."

"But what about when you were singing that 'one step closer' song in the shower earlier?" 'pony'Pinkie asked.

"...." Spike was immensely grateful that his mask hid the slight red tone his face took on just then.

"All right! Time for some terrifying tunes from the parents!" One of the teachers announced. "Let's see who can cause the most spine-tingling!" The first one was introduced as Trixie Lulamoon's dad, Jackpot.

"Trixie...? Sunset, isn't she the girl you said declared herself as Twilight's rival?" Spike whispered as the man performed a slightly off-key rendition of 'Spooky Scary Skeletons'.

"Yeah. Think she got miffed that Twilight's already on fours in our multiplication tables." She replied.

Once he was done, they all applauded, admitting he tried at least. Following him was a lady named Stormy Flare, the mother of Spitfire, a girl Rainbow got along with. Spike had to admit that she had some pipes as she belted out the Timewarp song, even dancing a bit. He also spotted her daughter facepalming a little.

Diamond Tiara's dad, a businessman by the name of Filthy Rich was up next. He just grinned and started up his pick. Suddenly a guitar riff started playing, and he let loose with a classic Metal Growl. "And it's Terror Time again! Even a few of the adults were freaked by it, while Diamond and Silver just cheered him on.

Spike had to resist headbanging to it. "Ok, now THAT was impressive!" Then it was his turn. He took a deep breath and tried not to chuckle when the announcer had to list off the girls he was guardian for. That and the cheers of 'Knock 'em dead, Onii-chan!" His grin widened as he selected a song and went into his best creepy voice. "If there's nothing in the darkness, then why do you lie awake?"

The girls seemed to cheer the loudest when he finished. The remaining parents mostly declined trying to sing or attempted to sing similar tunes to what had already been. Once they were done, a quartet of the teachers hopped up on stage. Well, more like a punk rocker, pirate, and cowgirl all pulling a samurai up with them.

"Oh, that's Mr. Sombra!" Scootaloo piped up, pointing to the samurai as they started into a four-way round of 'This is Halloween'.

"Isn't he the one you said a lot of the older students are terrified of?" Spike asked.

"Yeah, but he's really a nice guy." She replied. "It kinda confuses him, though."

The other girls pointed out the other three as Miss Luna, another Kindergarten teacher, First Grade teacher Cadance, and Celestia, who handled a Second Grade class.

Spike didn't know why, but Luna seemed a little familiar somehow. 'Could swear I saw her name somewhere else before.'

Author's Note

And part one of the Halloween Party Ends.

Party Time: Target Acquired!

"Onii-chan lost..." Sweetie looked down when Filthy was named the winner, with Spike getting second place.

"It's ok, second place isn't that bad, Sweetie." Rainbow said. "It's not first, but he got something ok." She perked up at the words 'two hundred and fifty dollar gift card'. "That's a lot, right?"

"Well, those apple caramels Applejack likes are about two dollars for a bag." Sunset did a lil math. "Yeah, that's a little over a hundred bags, give or take." She ignored the weird giggle the cowgirl let out at that.

"Why do you three insist in dragging me into your antics...?" Sombra sighed when he was finally able to sit back down. He pulled the helmet of his costume off, letting a mane of black hair fall down his back and a single, red-highlighted cowlick pop up on his forehead. "I hate singing."

"Oh, don't be such a killjoy, Sombry." Celestia chuckled, ignoring the dirty look he gave her for the nickname. "It's just for fun."

'Speaking of fun, I didn't know Mr. Rich was such a metalhead." Cadance chuckled. "I almost wanted to headbang myself."

"You'd be growling too with a wife like Spoiled." Luna muttered. "Awful woman."

"So, anyone recognize Mr. Tophat?" Cadance asked, changing the subject.

"Our resident Phantom of the Steampunk Opera? The wind up key is a nice touch." Sombra promptly got weird looks from all three women. "What? I like the style."

"Anyway..." Luna piped back up. "I believe that's Spike Drake, our local 'Onii-Chan', according to the girls he's a foster father/brother for."

"Oh, him." Celestia chuckled. "Heh, gotta hand it to him, looking after ten little girls solo is no mean feat."

"They love him to death, though. You all remember what happened to that boy who tried to mock him for it."

"Which one?" Sombra asked around his pizza. "The one Twilight Sparkle immobilized with an armlock? Or the one who ended up being chased by half of them after they got hold of the nerf bats last week?"

"That one. They went at least twice around the playground," Luna had to fight back a giggle. "I know they shouldn't really have done that, but it was hilarious. Never found out what he said to incite them, but I certainly doubt he'll do it a second time."

After a bit, photos were being offered.

"Like father, like daughter?" Sombra raised an eye at the overtly flashy poses Jackpot and Trixie tried to pull off. Even he could see the photographer was trying his best not to laugh.

Cadance's shoulders were shaking in quiet laughter. "He looks like he's trying to can-can!"

Filthy Rich's, with Diamond and Silver, was a bit more modest, though all three somehow managed to pull off faces, much to Celestia's amusement.

The photographer had to put on his wide-angle lens when Spike and the girls (and the costumed ponies) stepped up.

"Dogpile on the Phantom." Celestia singsonged after Spike was buried under the girls as they somehow all managed to climb onto him.

"It's actually kind of sweet." Cadance replied. "Just how much...they care..." She trailed off when he was asked to remove his mask. Her face rapidly started to redden. "Oh my..."

"HELLO!" Celestia's jaw dropped with a goofy smile. "I see some grade-A-Yum!"

"Homina!" Cadance squealed, wiggling in glee. "I think I'm in love!"

"Wow...those two are smitten. With a capital 'S'." Sombra said in mild surprise.

"Indeed." Luna said, with a calm that gave him pause.

"Heh, in all honesty, I'm not sure if I should envy or pity..him." He saw the look on her face, which stayed focused on Spike. It was an expression that said only one thing, just said it with a finality that made his leg hair stand on end.

'MINE.'

'Pity...DEFINITELY pity!' He thought, using a nearby plate of brownies as an escape plan.

Author's Note

Sorry about the shortness of this one, it was more or less just for introducing a few more characters Spike and the girls'll be interacting with.

A Date?

Spike sighed and looked at the shopping list. "Ok...Twilight, Fluttershy, Rarity, and Scootaloo want eggplant parm; Rainbow, Sunset, and Pinkie want pizza, and Apple Jack, Apple Bloom, and Sweetie want burgers." He looked around at the produce section of the store. "And the ponies all want a little bit of everything from here, and a cake." He shrugged and started looking through the artichokes, not noticing he was being watched.

Peeking around a spice kiosk, Luna took a deep breath and smoothed out her dress. "Ok, girl, you can do this. Just act natural." She peeked back around to see where he was. "Hmf, it should be illegal to be that tasty!" She grabbed her cart and headed over, doing her best to act nonchalant. The closer she got, though, the more she realized something. 'How the heck did he hide those arms in that costume!?' By the time she was in speaking distance, she nearly ran into a tomato display while staring at his back. "Mama liiiiike..."

"Huh?" Spike looked up from his shopping, causing Luna to clamp a hand over her mouth in a panic. He glanced around for a moment, wondering what that sound was. When he finally shrugged and resumed, she took a minute to calm down, bracing herself against the tomatoes.

'All right, Luna Solaris, you've been practicing for this since yesterday! Just go up, and say 'hi'! That's it, you can do this! You're ready!' She strode towards him, "Spike? Fancy seeing you..." She froze when he turned around. "HeeEEK!" She yelped when her feet caught on each other, sending her falling towards him.

"Wha--uff!" He grunted when he caught her on reflex. "Um, hi?"

At this moment, Luna was grateful for two things; that he couldn't currently see the look of embarrassment she was sporting, and contemplating if he'd ever let her use his stomach to shave ice.

"Wait...you're Luna, aren't you?" He asked as she back back to her feet. "My girls talked about you."

"I deny everything!" She replied, chuckling weakly at the bad joke. "Heh...uh, didn't expect to find you here."

"Yeah, well, this is the only place with any decent produce, and when one girls a vegetarian, another's an apple junkie, and the rest all have their own tastes...you get the idea."

"Heh, sounds like they can be a handful at times. Ever get time to yourself?"

"Does watching a little tv after they all go to bed count?"

"No, I mean, going out and doing something you personally enjoy."

"Oh...well, I've thought about it. More than once to be honest, but the problem is finding someone to look after them while I'm away." He sighed, slightly ruefully. "Tried hiring someone from a babysitting service one time last month...something I still regret doing."

That sent up a couple of warning bells for Luna. "Dare I ask...?"

"They sent over someone named Harshwhinny. She seemed a little strict, but I figured it wouldn't be too bad." His expression darkened a little. "By the time I got home, they'd barricaded themselves in their bedroom and she was pounding on the door screaming at them." He ran a hand through his hair. "Let's just say it's the first time I was seriously tempted to break a woman's jaw after they told me what'd happened."

Luna winced a little. "Ooch! Sounds like the aftermath wasn't that much fun."

"Not really...after I finally kicked her out and called to complain, it was a good long while before any of them calmed down enough to sleep. Don't think I went back downstairs at all that night. Was the last time I ever considered getting a babysitter."

Luna considered her options carefully. She'd heard about the local babysitting service taking a big hit to their reputation because one of their workers had crossed a line somewhere, but she'd never heard the details. And from the sound of things, Spike didn't seem too keen to take the chance again. "Well..." she started, "...how about my sister?"

"Huh?" He looked at her. "You have a sister?"

"Celestia. Older sister, technically, but she loves kids. One of the main reasons she became a teacher. And, between you and me, she hates acting her age at times. I don't think any of the girls are in her class, but she won't mind.

"Well...I wouldn't mind being able to do something myself on occasion. There's a few things I like the girls don't really care for."

"And..." Luna's smile turned slightly coy. "If you want, I wouldn't mind helping you enjoy that night off."

Spike stared at her for a second, chuckling slightly. "Miss Solaris....i-if I didn't know any better, I'd assume you were asking me out on a date."

She shrugged, leaning in. "Is it working?"

*A Couple of Hours Later*

"All right, you lot. Let's get this stuff inside and unpacked. I got something to tell you all." After getting groceries, he'd managed to leave just time to pick the girls up after school. Now the whole group were marching in, each one with a bag or two in their hands.

"W-what is it, Onii-chan...?" Fluttershy asked uneasily.

"It's nothing bad, if that's what you're thinking." He replied, putting meat and things in the freezer. "I....well, I have a date this weekend."

"Really!?"

"That's great!"

"Woo-hoo!"

"That's wonderful, darling!" 'pony'Rarity trotted up. "Who's the lucky lady?"

"It's Luna Solaris"

"You got a date with Miss Luna? That sounds fun!" Twilight squeak. "Um...Onii-chan?"

"Yeah?"

"What's a date?"

"Uh...well...ohh-boy..."

"Hey, Tia! How do you feel about winning some points with Mr. Hunky!?"

First Date, First En-canter.

Luna raised an eye when she noticed Spike trying to be subtle in taking a deep calming breath. "Nervous?"

"Kinda...more like really, really rusty at dating." He admitted, ordering some crab scampi while Lune when for the six-cheese manicotti, "Haven't been on one since seventh grade."

"Oh? How that go?"

He fiddled with one of the breadsticks. "Not quite how I had hoped. Let's just say it started lukewarm and ended with her leaving me with a $50 restaurant bill while she left with the baseball team's center fielder. Had to call my parents because of it."

Luna winced. "Ouch...that had to be embarrassing."

"Yeah. Karma caught up with them, though. HIS girlfriend...or his ex-girlfriend, as she then called herself, found out. And proceeded to beat the crap out of both, in front of half the school." He chuckled a bit. "Then offered to buy me some nachos to try and make up a little for the douchbaggery."

"Oh my." Luna snickered...before pausing. "Wait a sec...um, Spike...just out of curiosity, the baseball player, his name wouldn't happen to have been 'Tirek', would it?"

"Yeah, but how did..." He trailed off when he stared a little closer at her, especially her eyes. The breadstick slipped out of his hand when he made the connection. "N-Nightmare Moon??"

Luna chuckled, putting a slight purr in her voice. "Heh, long time no see...'Specs'."

Spike turned bright red at that. Tirek always bragged about how he'd 'bagged' the girl everyone knew as 'The Nightmare Moon', yet he was a sobbing, pummled heap on the ground after she was done. Nightmare Moon and her sister, Daybreaker, where considered the scariest pair at school. And since he used to wear glasses - thank god for prescription contacts - she'd taken to calling him 'Specs' as a pet name when they bonded over the soured date.

And now, the same girl who he was admittedly terrified of at first, was his date that night.

"Then...Celestia...holy crap."

"You know Tia's gonna be all over you when it clicks for her, Speccy." Luna said. "Though...guess I can't really call you that now since you don't have those big glasses anymore. What happened to them?"

"Oh, um, I got contacts a few years ago. I mean, I still have glasses for when I don't feel like sleeping, but don't wanna put them back in just to read or watch tv."

"Aw, but you were cute in those things." Luna pouted a bit.

He turned even redder. "C-cute...?"

"May not've been the kinda gal to actually say it, but didn't mean I wasn't thinking it." She twirled one of her own breadsticks around. "Speaking of thinking; honestly, Specs, what made you think a girl with that name was worth it?" She gave him a slightly exasperated look.

"Spoiled asked me out...and my grandpa told me never judge a book by the title...aand that's not quite helping my defense, is it?"

"Well, if it helps, Tirek admitted he thought it would be a good 'prank' to play on you. That and the slimebag agreed to make Spoiled his so-called main gal, with me as a 'side girl'."

Spike groaned. "I should be surprised, but it was Tirek, so I'm not. Though that does explain why you almost shoulder-charged her through old Mrs. Medowbrook's fence." He took a bite out of the sticks. "Whatever happened to that brat?"

"Goes by Spoiled Rich now, and she's a mom. Though not a very good one." Luna replied, ducking the wad of bread when Spike half-choked.

"Wha?? *Ack! KAFF!* She's a m-mother!? For real!?" He wheezed.

"Yep. Diamond Tiara's mom, to be exact."

"Oh...wow...that poor kid...should I offer my condolences?"

Luna snorted as she tried to stifle her laughter. "And it's stuff like that that makes me glad I recommended you for that foster parent program."

Spike froze. "Way whu wha-now?"

Celestia shakily climbed to her feet, her gaze never leaving the two tiny horses-

"Ponies!" The pink one corrected.

Right, ponies..."Wait, what?" Celestia double-taked, before shaking it off. "Ponies...there are two tiny ponies here...and why do you look like Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash??"

By then, the girls, having heard the shriek, had already gathered around the scene. "Oh, heh...um...'cause those are pony version of us?" Rainbow said.

"Well, that kind of makes sense-ack! There are two tiny talking ponies sitting RIGHT. THERE." She pointed. "They are barely six inches tall! And one is bright pink, and the other is blue! And flying!"

"It's kind of a long story." Applejack said.

"I know this may kind of a shock, but we can explain everything." A voice that sounded like Twilight spoke up behind Celestia.

"Was that who I think it might be?" Celestia asked.

"Yep! The others are right behind ya!" 'pony'Pinkie pointed to the other counter. Celestia turned, and sure enough, there were other equally diminutive, and brightly colored equines. And they all bore a striking resemblance to the girls.

Celestia's knees shook slightly. "Oh my god..."

"Wait, Miss Solaris, before you freak out-!" Sunset started.

"They are freaking ADORABLE!" Celestia squealed, scooping as many of the ten ponies into her arms as she could. "They're like talking puppies!"

"Is that a good thing?" 'pony'Sweetie Belle squeaked, currently upside down in the woman's arms.

Pony's Out Of the Bag

"All right. Just let me get this right; when Spike brought you all home from your first day at school, you all thought someone had broken in." Celesta said, once she let the ponies go and the girls gave her an explanation.

"Yeah." Sunset nodded. "Onii-chan thought they might've still been inside and told us to get outside and call the cops. But we couldn't get the phone working, and we started getting worried, so I went in to tell him. And that's when I saw him holding pony Pinkie and Applejack."

"Right." Celestia picked up pony Rarity and started scratching her belly. "And after a talk, that's when the rest of you fluffballs came outta hiding."

"Well, while I do like keeping my coat soft...um, could you please...mm...little more to the left." the little marshmallow laid back, idly twitching her hooves in the air.

"Yeah, but it's been over two months since you started there. how in the world were you able to keep these gals from being found?"

"Well, we've gotten pretty good at staying outta sight." Pony Scootaloo spoke up. "Also, this place is kind of outta the way from things. Besides, you and the other teachers all saw us once."

"Saw you? What..." Celestia paused for a second as her memory rebooted. "Wait a sec... The Halloween party! I could've sworn I saw Twilight's little cat doll look my way!" She stared blankly for a moment before bursting out into laughter. "You were all right there and I didn't even notice!"

"That means our costumes were awesome, right?" Pony Rainbow spoke up.

"Well, they definitely let you blend in." She chuckled again. "Oh man, I'm wondering if Luna's having as much of a time as I am."

Spike stared at her incredulously. "That was you??" He gestured helplessly in an attempted to find the proper response. "Why?? What in the world made you think, out of anyone, that I was responsible enough for that? I mean, you know I was a slacker back in school!"

"True." Luna's smirk widened. "But you really should've covered your tracks better. I managed to follow you a couple of times when you slinked off during lunch. Managed to tail you to the soup kitchen. Was kind of interesting how the workers knew you by name, even handing you an apron."

Spike's expression quickly shifted to a 'caught red handed' look. "I...ah..."

"Or when you'd stop and spend your lunch money to buy sandwich stuff for that group of homeless who set up house in that old shop behind the parking garage."

He sighed. "Ok, ok. You got me...it was just something I did when I managed to find the time."

"I do have one question, though. Why hide it?"

"Are you kidding? You remember how some of those teacher were, Luna! They'd look for any excuse to 'volunteer' a student into charity work or a crummy fundraiser stunt."

"Oh yeah.." Luna grimaced at the thought. They'd tried to rope her into gong door to asking for donations to a 'supply maintenance fund' which was just to pay for new junk in the teacher's lounge. She'd rolled in some poison ivy to make herself look sick so she could get out of it.

"I did that stuff because I wanted to. If they'd found out, they would have turned it into a job for me, and not a fun one! That's why I did what I could to keep them off my track. You, on the other hand..."

"What can I say? It was a talent. As for why I did what I did, when I heard about the girls, I remembered what you'd done back then, besides the homeless work...like when you tutored the new girl. What was her name, Zia...Zesa...?

"Zecora." Spike replied, as their orders arrived. "All I did was help her get up to snuff with her geometry and math."

"Well, it helped her, considering the kiss she gave you." 'Lucky little...' She muttered under her breath. "Anyway, I remembered that and just threw your name out mostly." She blushed sheepishly. "Wasn't even expecting you to be granted custody of all ten."

"In all honesty, it scared the tar out me at first." He replied. "I mean, I was living in a one bedroom apartment when I found out. If it wasn't for the fact I was lucky as hell and found this place..." He didn't really need to say what the results could have been.

"If it helps, you've done a pretty good job. Being one guy looking at ten girls is no mean feat."

'You ain't just whistling dixie, sister.' Spike thought. "Well, thankfully they get along. At least the ponies have similar personalities." He froze when he realized he'd said that bit out loud.

"What ponies?" Luna asked. "I didn't see or hear any horses around the place."

"Uh-oh."

"I think we've been around this corner before. That's the third time we've passed that lamp."

"But we took a left this time!"

"You tell me! I don't know hide nor hair of this place."

"Let's just go, maybe we'll run into whoever lives here."

"Provided they don't step on us first, if that huge-plot chair is any indication."

"Oh, don't be such a worrywort, Lulu."

Author's Note

yes, I know it's short, but this is more of a slice of life/comedy deal, so i'm kinda treating the chapters like episodes of a show.

Intermission: I got my own mini!

Spike gulped. The look Luna was giving him didn't help. 'Oh crap...think, man!' "Uh, heh....I-It's a show the girls like. They-"

"Specs." Luna's expression slowly turned into the one she used as Nightmare Moon when she wanted a straight answer. "I heard you. You said 'similar personalities...like the girls'. Ten different girls, and one's a nine-year old vegetarian."

It was at this point that he mentally let loose with a panicky stream of terms that would possibly get him slapped by half the people in the restaurant, dishwasher included. He tried to think of a way to talk his way out of it, but between her stare and his panic, he was coming up with just jack and squat.

"Well?"

His shoulders slumped, along with a sigh of defeat. "Ok...but odds are you aren't gonna believe a word of it."

Luna propped her elbows on the table. "Try me."

"Ok..."

As she stared at the small (no pun intended) group of girls and pint-sized equines, Celestia inadvertently let out a sputtering laugh before she managed to catch herself. "Heh, sorry. Just an old habit when I'm still wrapping my head around something. I mean, I just had a conversation with horses..."

"Ponies!" Girls and ponies all said in unison.

"Yeah, ponies...that I can hold in my hand. Last time I had and encounter like this, I mead the mistake of eating some mushrooms my roommate had...thought she was using them for pizzas... Can never look at a feather boa and bowl of macaroni the same way again...a-anyway!" She quickly composed herself. "Part of me is kinda wishing your guardian had something I could use to settle myself with...maybe a glass or two."

"Glasses!?" 'pony' Twilight yelped, her wings flapping in surprise. "Oh no! He didn't forget, did he??" Before any of them could respond, she took off down the hall.

"I say something wrong?" Celestia asked, doing a quick breath check.

"Nah, while we were exploring, Twilight found out he has a pair of glasses he wears sometimes after taking his contacts out." 'pony' Sunset answered her.

"I didn't know he wore contacts!" Rarity and Twilight blurted out together.

"Glasses?" Celestia asked.

"Yes, a lovely pair of wireframes." 'pony' Rarity added. "Personally I think they look fantastic on him."

"Hmm.." Celestia mused, picturing the result...and a goofy little smile slowly began forming on her face. "Ehehehe...'Tia likey..."

"HUZZAH!" A voice that sounded alarmingly like Celestia's, though a tad squeakier, yelled from nearby, followed by 'pony' Twlight shrieking in surprise. "The vision has been DOUBLED!"

"Tia, that's not funny!" A squeaky Luna voice responded. "And I don't sound like that!"

"P-Princess Celestia!? Princess Luna!"

"Twilight, you're a sight for sore eyes!" The other Celestia replied.

"How'd you get here? And why are you wearing glasses??"

The others watched as 'pony' Twilight reemerged from around the corner, joined by two more tiny ponies. Ones that looked suspiciously like Celestia and Luna. The Celestia one was currently wearing a pair of glasses several sizes too big for her. Both stopped in their tracks, however, when they saw the others.

"YOU LOOK LIKE ME!" Both Celestias yelled.

"And they've just been doubled..." The pony Luna groaned and facehoofed. "Horseapples..."

"...so I have ten little girls and their small, sapient, technicolor pony counterparts living with me." Spike finished his tale, smiling sheepishly.

Luna just stared at him blankly.

"Uh, L-Luna?"

She glanced at her glass of cola. "I'm trying to decide if i should believe that before or after I ask for some whisky to put in this."

Still need that drink.

"Ok, let's say, outside of how insane that does sound..." Luna added a second shot of whiskey to her cola just in case. "I do believe you, how in the name of not-crazy are you AND the girls able to miss a herd of bizarrely colored horses..."

"Ponies, technically." Spike said.

"...ponies, inside your house??"

"Actually they're about puppy-size, and they said they were pretty good at hiding."

Luna contemplated if she should keep a third shot on hand...maybe fireball this time. "Puppy-sized ponies..."

"Yeah, I kinda had the same reaction." He sighed. "I know I can't really explain this in a way that doesn't sound out there..."

*Can I get a Woop Woop! Woop Woop!*

He paused. "Is...is that your..."

"Dang it, Tia!" Luna took her phone out. "She messed with my ringtones again! ....and speak of the demented older sister..."

"Something happen back at the house?" Spike asked, visibly concerned.

"No, she's sending me a photo...a selfie? Really, sis? I..." Spike could only watch as Luna's expression morphed from 'annoyed younger sibling' to confused, then loose-jaw disbelief. "Ho-lee..."

"What is it?"

"Well, you don't have to worry about me believing you." Luna showed him her phone. On it was a picture of Celestia...and a pony version of her in her arms.

Both were making 'duck faces' to the camera. In the back, a pony version of Luna was facehoofing at them.

"Oh." He stared at the photo for a second. "I should be, at the bare minimum surprised, but I'm not. Should I be worried about that?"

"Ooh, fabulous!" Both Celestias continued to pose and make goofy faces for photos while 'pony' Luna decided to talk to the others.

"So, none of you recall how you ended up in this house?" She asked, before looking at the girls. "And one with human versions of all of you."

"I'm afraid not, Princess Luna." Twilight replied. "All any of us know is waking up in a trunk in the basement."

"Sadly, all the two of us can recall is the sound of some cracking, like a window. Then a blinding light."

"Yeah, we both woke up in a run-down shed out in the woods." 'pony' Celestia added. Took us a week to get here. Not sure why, but coming this way seemed like the right idea."

"Well, one thing's for sure. Onii-chans's gonna be needing an explanation." Sunset said, counting up how many ponies were there now.

"Who?"

"Spike, he's the gentleman taking care of these girls." 'pony'Rarity clarified.

"Yeah, he's out on a date with your human self." 'pony'Pinkie said, bouncing beside her counterpart.

"A...a date..." 'pony' Luna stared. "I..I'm on a-a date??" Her wings flapped a couple of times before she whirled around, pointing a triumphant hoof at both Celestias. "HA! In your face, Sunbutt!"

Reuniiincoming!

"Are they still alive...?" Rainbow asked, taking another step back from the two Lunas. Both had been staring at each other for the last few minutes the moment human Luna came back inside.

"They're still breathing...Ah think." Pony AJ replied.

"I don't know-quit it!" Spike said, confiscating sharpies from both Celestias.

...yet again.

Twilight gave an uneasy look. "Should we call someone..."

"Tiltawhirl!" Both Lunas suddenly blurted out, making them jump. "Peanut Brittle!"

"What are they doing?" Both Pinkies asked. "Can we join in?"

"Pad kid poured curd pulled cod!" Human and pony stared at each other. "...yep, she's me."

"This is so unreal..." Human Luna said in awe.

Right before she scooped her pony self. "I'm so freaking CUTE as a PONY!" She squealed, spinning around.

"Getting dizzy!" Pony Luna yelped.

"Huh, never expected Nightmare Moon so giddy over cute." Spike murmured to himself. However, he was unaware that Celestia was right behind him.

Her eyes narrowed. "Nightmare...she hasn't..." She abruptly spun him around so they were face to face. "Wait a sec..." Confusion morphed to realization. "S-Specs??"

'Busted.' He thought, and chuckled slightly. "Heh, hi...Daybreaker."

Silence reigned before...

"SPECCCY!!!"

"Is that what they call a 'glomp'?' Apple Bloom asked, watching the two adults sail across the room.

"Question." Pony Sunset glanced up at Luna; and her unnervingly calm expression. "Anyone else suddenly feeling like we should run like cowards?"

Spellcheck

"Ok, we got a lotta questions..." Pony Applejack said once Celestia had let Spike go (or after Luna let go of her ear). "Like, what kinda nickname is Daybreaker??"

"You can ask Nightmare Moon here." Celestia answered, sulking a little.

Pony Luna looked up. "Nightmare...? Why does that name seem familiar?"

"And why did she c-call Onii-chan 'Specs'?" Fluttershy added.

"It was my nickname in school." Spike sat up from the spot on the floor where he'd landed. "At least, it was with those two." He took the glasses Pony Lunu had found and put them on.

"Celestia and me...we were known for getting into trouble a fair bat during our school years. We thought 'Nightmare Moon' and 'Daybreaker' sounded badass."

"Oh, that mean you were chunky-bimbos?" Pinkie asked.

"Hey..." Luna and Celestia looked mildly offended. "I'm not chunky..."

"Don't you mean chewy-nibbles?" Rainbow asked.

Sunset chook her head. "No, it's chumba-nipples."

"No, it's jeweled-knee-bows." Rarity joined in. "Though why anyone would put bows there..."

"I thought it was chunder-bingo." Fluttershy spoke up.

"Girls, it's Chimp-you-butts...I think." Twilight scratched her head. "...or was it Chompy-nubbies?"

"Guys! It's 'Chunnibyou'." Celestia corrected them. They all just stared at her.

Sunset snorted. "Come on, that's just silly."

"It don't make no sense at all." Applebloom added.

Spike, meanwhile, was too busy laughing like an idiot.

"That's what I said!" Rainbow protested. "It's Chewy-nibbles!"

"You said it was chibi-nipples!" Sweetie accused Scootaloo.

"It's anime! Everything is chibi!"

"Then explain that show Onii-chan was watchin' last week!" Applebloom cut in. "An' ah still say it's pronounced chompy-biggles."

Mornings

"Girls! Breakfast!" Spike called up the stairs, polishing off his bacon sandwich. "C'mon, munchkins, up and at 'em!"

"Coming, Onii-chan!" A group of female voices yelled back in unison.

He smirked a little. When he finally moved out on his own a few months ago, he'd figured his life would slide into a fairly standard pattern. At least, a pattern that didn't involve learning he'd been picked to be a foster older brother/parent to a group of preadolescence girls. Especially girls that took to calling him that name almost from day one. It was, admittedly, pretty damn cute.

Soon the approaching stampede of feet let him know to take a step to the side and allow the crowd of nine and ten-year olds to scamper by. Watching them run past, still in their pajamas, he ticked off each in case one thought she could be sneaky and head back to bed.

Twilight Sparkle was the first one down. A book-loving half-pint that hoped to become a researcher when she got older. Beside her was Fluttershy, the timid one and animal lover of the group. In her arms was her stuffed bunny, Angel. Applejack, the oldest, was right behind them, with her little sister, Apple Bloom, riding piggy back.

Pinkie Pie soon followed. She was the borderline hyper one. She'd said it felt like a sleepover every night there, and she loved it. Then it was Rainbow Dash, the rowdiest girl Spike'd ever seen. She claimed she hated 'mushy stuff' but it was impossible not to see how close she was with her own (sort of) little sister, Scootaloo. Then Sunset Shimmer. She'd been a little hesitant around him at first, but thankfully the redhead warmed up to him before long. And last but not least, Rarity, possibly the most fashion-conscious second-grader he'd ever seen, helping her little sister, Sweetie Belle, down.

"All right, you lot. You know the drill; breakfast then get dressed for school. Starting your new school today, remember?" He was treated to a variety of responses from there.

"Really!?" Twilight perked up and almost ran to the dinner table, Sunset right behind her.

Rainbow, on the other hand, groaned. "Do we have to?"

"Yes, Rainbow. Just like I have to go to work." He heard the disgruntled sigh and decided to sweeten the deal. "Aand it's gonna be the first day for them too." He pointed to Sweetie, Scoot, and Bloom.

"We goin' too?" Bloom piped up through a mouthful of pancake.

"Yep, first day of Kindergarten. Gonna need your big sisters to help show you the ropes." He went in for the kill. "Besides, Rainbow, don't you want your lil sis cheering you on at the tryouts for the junior soccer team I heard they have?"

That did it. Next thing he knew, she was at the table with the others. Well, except for one. He crouched down in front of the almost teary-eyed girl. "What's wrong, Shy?"

She just whimpered and moved closer to him, burying her face in his shoulder.

"She's scared 'bout goin'." Applejack said.

"Ah." He turned back to Fluttershy. "Let me guess, going to a strange place and possibly getting separated from your sisters?"

"Y-you too..." She said softly, her voice muffled a little.

Spike hugged her, his heart breaking a little for the little girl. "Hey, it'll be ok." He whispered, holding her close. "Here, I got an idea. I'll be right back!" He quickly made his way up to his bedroom and started looking through the drawers. "Come on...where are you!? HA!" He grabbed something from under a sweater and headed back down.

Meanwhile, the others were watching. "What do you think he's doing?" Sunset asked.

Rainbow just shrugged.

"Ok. Fluttershy, I want you to meet Void." He held up a baseball-sized black dragon plush.

"Void?" Applejack asked with no small amount of disbelief.

Spike shrugged. "I was eight and thought the word sounded cool." He placed it in Fluttershy's hand. "When I was little, I was nervous as all get-out starting a new year, much less going to a new school. But, I snuck this lil guy around with me in my pocket and it helped. Now, Angel's probably going to be too big for you to carry around, but Void here is just small enough to keep in your supply case."

As soon as he was done, Fluttershy pounced in a hug. "Thank you, Onii-chan!" She squealed, nuzzling the little dragon plush before letting him go and scampering to the table.

The moment she wasn't looking, he quickly gestured to the other girl, then his eyes, then Fluttershy. They got the message; 'Keep an eye on her when you can'

While they finished their breakfast, he sent them all to get dressed and got to cleaning up the dishes. 'Can't really blame her. This can be a big deal for a kid her age.' He thought, scrubbing up the plates.

"Ooh, I like him already!"

"What?" He turned around at the noise. It sounded like it had come from near the stairs, and a bit like Pinkie...but there was no one there. He quickly went over and called up. "Pinkie?"

"Yeah, Niichan?" The bubbly girl's voice confirmed she was up there.

"Did you say something just now?"

"Just telling Sunny that I hope the cafeteria has chicken nuggets. Why?"

Spike paused. 'Ok...whatever that was sounded a little like Pinkie, but she's not the type to lie about something. So....what the hell...?' "N-nothing. Just my ears playing tricks on me." He went back to the the sink and started back up...

When he heard it again. Though this time, it was a soft, almost inaudible clip-clop sound, like a horse was trotting around on the wooden floors.

'Maybe I just heard wrong...' He thought, looking in the living room. Nothing was there. After all, there was a small ranch not far from the house, and sometimes the owners rode by. So, it could've been them...

Except it was on a. Wooden. Floor! He looked around the room one more time. Maybe it was nerves messing with him. After all, this was going to be the first day he and the girls would be apart since he became their foster brother/dad. So he was probably just having separation anxiety. 'Wonder if this is how biological parents feel on days like this.

Thankfully, he'd managed to put it out of his head for now by the time the girls came back down, dressed and with their new school supplies. "Ok, you all ready? Let's hit the car." He led them out and made sure they were all buckled in before getting in himself.

As they pulled out, he took one more look at the house. If he didn't know any better he could've sworn he saw something either pink, or purple, in one of the second floor windows.

And it waved at him.

First Date, Pt1.

"Ah still don't see why we all gotta stay home." Applejack muttered, watching Spike shave. She still had doubts about this whole 'date' brouhaha.

"Yeah, what if it's not even the real Miss Luna who asked you?" Rainbow chimed in. "What if 'she's some kinda evil, slime-spewing, bug-eyed monster here to take everything over!?"

His gaze landed on the blonde first. "Because, we'll be going to a couple of places that you lot are too young to go to. And Rainbow, you've been reading WAY too many 'Planet of the Morphman Monsters' comics."

"It's a perfectly valid complaint." Rainbow pouted.

"Will you two relax? Celestia'll be here with you, and from the way you all perked up at that, it's safe to say she'll be a lot more pleasant than...well, you know who."

"SHHHHH! We dareth not speakth yon name!" Pinkie cried out in a gravely voice...before having a coughing fit from it.

"Uh, right. Look, my point is, nothing bad is gonna happen. Heck, time'll probably fly by while we're gone; and that does not mean taping your watch to a paper airplane."

"It still worked!" The three girls replied in unison.

Spike hurried to get finished and dressed in time. He wasn't exactly sure when they'd be there, but they said they'd try to arrive by seven. "Ok, I want all of you to be good and listen to Celestia while I'm gone, ok?"

"Ok, Onii-chan." The girls all said in unison ("Still say check her for antennae." Rainbow muttered). He gave them all a quick kiss on the forehead and looked as the ponies all grouped up on the couch.

"Don't worry, Spike, we'll help keep an eye on things." 'pony'Twilight spoke up, getting noises of confirmation from the others.

"Thanks, Twi." He grinned and gave her a scratch behind the ears, just in time to hear the doorbell.

"Scatter!" 'pony'Sunset called out, every equine bolting under or behind a piece of furniture as he head to the door.

"Heeyyyyyyammama!" Celestia grinned when she spied him, getting an elbow from Luna in return.

"Sorry about the wait, wanted to be sure we made a good first impression." Luna chuckled, biting her lip slightly when she gave him the once-over.

"Heh, well...um..." He faltered a bit as he tried to think of something to say.

Thankfully, Luna came to the rescue. "Ok, well, we should probably get going. Hey, girls!" She smiled to the bunch, adjusting her coat as she did. "Some of you probably already know Celestia, so intros aren't fully necessary. Have fun, Sis!"

"Remember, it's a weekend, so you can stay up till eleven, but tha'ts it!" Spike called out as he got dragged off to Luna's car.

Celestia watched as they got in and started pulling out of the driveway before closing the door. Soon as it shut, she pulled her phone out. "You girls up for takeout? I have a craving for some spring rolls and wonton soup."

"Hope they'll be ok." Spike said as the house vanished around the turn and Luna pulled out onto the main road.

"Ah, don't worry. If it's one thing Tia's good at, it's handling kids." Luna waved his fear off. "Besides, you should see her when there's frosted donuts at the break room."

"Actually I was referring to Celestia." Spike replied. "The girls kind of had mixed feeling about me going on a date. heh, Rarinbow's sort of convinced you're some bug-eyed monster pretending to be Luna."

Luna fought hard, but invariably lost to the the gigglefit from that . "A 'Morphman Monster' fan, I take? I have the whole series." The giggles increased at the look he gave her. "Whaat? *gigglesnort* I love corny sci-fi stories."

Spike just rolled his eyes a little. "Gimmie a good horror comic any day. Used to get 'Spiral Town Stories' before it got canceled."

Luna blew a raspberry in response. "Spiral Town? Please! Get some 'Tomie's Tales', sleep'll be the last thing on your mind after a couple of those!"

"Hey, don't knock the Town! The Jiggers the Juggler issue is why I'll have a bat in my hand before I EVER get near a clown."

The pair continued their literature discussion as they made their way into town, finally pulling into the parking lot of a restaurant Spike recognized. "The 'Delfino Cascade'? Didn't this place just open up a couple weeks ago?"

"Yeah. Granted, the name sound's pretty snobby, but I heard they have awesome lobster ravioli." She said as they got out.

"Really? Never had lobster myself."

"Then we're both in for a treat." They both headed inside. The restaurant itself was slightly empty, but the people that were there seemed to be enjoying things. "Looks nice."

"And no reservations, too." Spike added. "My kind of-" The rest of his sentence was lost when she took her coat off, revealing the small, cross-strapped black dress she had on. The material hugged her curves, and showed off a considerable amount of leg as well.

"Hm?" She grinned and playfully stuck her tongue out at the look he had. "Wanted to make a good first impression." She said. "Looks like I succeeded."

"I-I'll say!" Spike said to himself, forcing himself to not stare while he followed her to a table. As he did, he noticed a few guys looking his way with envy. He just gave them a 'i'm surprised, too' shrug. 'Wonder if the girls are in for a surprise like me.'

"...so I tell her, 'Madam...and I use that term oh SO very loosely, that petrified muskrat on your cabasa shows you wouldn't know class if it danced up in a flamenco outfit and stuffed a twinkie up your nose!'" Celestia finished her tale as the delivery guy left their order on the kitchen table, to numerous laughing girls. "Unfortunately, her reaction is kind of the reason I'm not allowed in that waffle house anymore. But! In my defense, no one ever told me a fountain drink machine could geyser like that."

"Part of me wants to ask how...but I'm really afraid to ask." Scootaloo piped up.

"Was kinda majestic in a way." Celestia pulled out containers. "Ok...Fluttershy: veggie egg rolls. Applejack and Bloom: hot and sour soup. Pinkie: shrimp fried rice...."

After a few minutes, all the food had been parsed out, and they were all chowing down.

"Eep! Hot! Hot! Thour, too!"

"It said it right in the name, Sis!" Apple Bloom said, watching the blonde chug her apple juice to try and clear the heat.

"URP!"

"REALLY, Rainbow!" Rarity reeled from the belch, "Show some man-BRAAAP!"

"Wow, you hit the high note with that, Rarity!" Pinkie giggled, patting the furiously blushing girl on the shoulder.

"UURRRAAAHHHHAA..!" Celestia patted her chest. "Whew, those rolls got some kick to them!"

When the others looked in surprise at the sheer volume, Sunset and Rainbow responded with golf claps.

"Say, you would happen to have any soy sauce, would you?" She sifted through the seasoning packs, "Looks out we're out here."

"In the fridge I...I think." Fluttershy said. "Onii-chan likes to put it on his burgers."

"Cool. Hope it's the strong stuff." Celestia headed over and started examining the contents. "Block of chedder, pesto, irish cream...cool, black garlic! Here it is!" She pulled out the small bottle and was about to head back to the table when something small, and pink, appeared out of the corner of her eye. "That's weird." She said, checking out the little toy pony sitting on the counter. "Where'd that come from? Hey, girls? Any of you leave a stuffed horse on the counter?"

"What do you mean?" Twilight responded.

"Ah got all my stuff upstairs." Applejack replied.

"Well, unless it's Spike's, there's a pink toy horse here." She turned back to give it a look, not really hearing when one asked 'she say pink horse??'. "Hm, must've been expensive. Actually looks life..."

Did it....did it just....blink?

"Hi!"

"WAAHAHA! IT MOVED!" Celestia screamed, falling over in shock.

"Wahaha! It moved!" 'pony'Pinkie Pie topped over in laughter.

Celestia just stared up in a mix of alarm, surprise, and bowel-loosening terror while the pint-sized equine looked over the edge at her and waved a tiny hoof. "Hi!"

"Pinkie! Are you out of your mind!" A voice that sounded strangely like Rainbow, but older, yelled out, followed by an equally small, blue pony flying down. "What in Celestia - not you -" She pointed at the still gobsmacked woman, "...possessed you to do that!?"

"Huy...hee...hooa..." Celestia replied as best she could.

"I vote Sunset and Twilight explaining this!" Sweetie spoke up.

Intermission: Who Needs Turn Signals!?

"Isn't the speed limit for-WHOA!" Spike yelled as Luna's car drifted around a corner, nearly taking a trash can along for the ride. They'd opted for takeaway and head back to the house. "That was a one-way street! What's got you in Mario Andretti mode to start with!?"

"Considering the fact that there are literal. Talking. Mini pony versions of us; the urge to see this for myself is, well, making my geek side giddy." She replied, leaning out of the window to yell something rude at her new tailgater.

"Ok....and the insane-"

"Also, just thinking about what TWO Celestias might get themselves into scares the crap outta me!"

"Well, both of them are easily entertained." 'pony' Luna said, watching the two versions of her sister taking selfies with various filters. "Aside from that, tell me about this Spike fellow, the one my other self is out with!" She quickly turn to the other ponies.

*HOOONK!*

"DANG IT, CELESTIA!" An irate voice yelled from outside.

Everyone turned to said woman, who just shrugged. "What? Slipped the mechanic a twenty to change her horn."

"You know this means war, sister!" Luna muttered, getting out of the car as soon as it skidded to a halt.

Spike just tumbled out in a heap, a raccoon holding onto him for dear life. "That wasn't a detour!" He squawked.

Once it got its bearings, the raccoon shook a paw at Luna and angrily chittered something uncomplimentary before running like mad into the wood.