Chapter 1 – Celestial Woes
You blackhearted tyrant!
"Huh?"
We trusted you, we dedicated our lives to humbly serving you and you arrogantly throw us away!
"Wait, what do you--"
Save us! If there is an ounce of decency left within you, please save us!
"What is going on here, I don't under--"
Don't let us die, save us!
"No!"
Her eyes open sharply as the violet irises within them drown into the white and red sea that accompanies her bloodshot eyes. As her irises re-adjust to the dark scenery and her mind finally recollects the somewhat disturbing events that took place within the refuge of her sub-consciousness, she swiftly and accurately came to one conclusion...
She just had a nightmare...
Before a sigh of relief could pass through her still-trembling lips, a burst of light equipped with it's own exuberantly loud banging sound made itself known to her photo-sensitively confused irises.
“Your majesty is everything alright! We just heard your scream and was wondering if something was wrong?” judging by the urgency and gruffness in their tone of voice (and their handsomely well-crafted golden armour) she could tell that these men were the Royal Guards that were sanctioned on night duty.
“All is well, there is no need to fret, I merely just had a nightmare—”.
A shrill shrieking noise and an unsteady hoof wrapped around a spear later, a squeaky sounding royal guard suddenly exclaimed, “Nightmare Moon! Where is she, I will swear to protect you from any danger—”.
A loud knock on a helmet was heard and disgruntled, dark blue, Alicorn entered the room with a stern expression. “If thou art done with thy incessant whining, we would like to sleep!”, and with that the royal guards hastily retreated from the princesses quarters.
The disgruntled Alicorn then turned her attention to her dearest sister, who looked rather frightened and perturbed by something. “Is something wrong, sis? You seem to be upset about something...”.
Her sister froze at the question, not even daring to look into her sibling's eyes she shakily replies, “No, everything is fine Luna, you can go now...”.
Luna raised an eyebrow in suspicion, but decided on a sigh being the right course of action and simply trotted towards the door, “If you say so... Good night 'Tia!”, and at that she left the room.
Celestia smiles softly to herself and lays her head gently down onto the mattress once more before mumbling, “Good night, my sister, for I fear it might be my last...”.
<(O_O)>
“Spike!”
The frustrated cry of an exasperated lavender mare penetrated the lonely silence of the night, she paces back and forth under the shine of the moonlight in clear bewilderment as to what to do next.
A young baby dragon rose from his slumber and stretched his mighty arms with a powerful yawn (or so he describes his light yawn and mild stretch as he slowly crawls from underneath his blanket...) he then gazed critically at his surrogate mother and replied...
“What is it, Twilight? It's so late at night...”.
Without a second thought, Twilight shoved a calender into Spike's chest, promptly knocking over the dragon and causing more confusion in his young mind...
“Huh? What do you want me to do with this?” Spike asked his somewhat distraught friend, seemingly unaware of the brevity of the situation or perhaps oblivious to how urgent it is.
With a groan of frustration, Twilight irritably pointed her hoof at the encircled date on the calender and it finally dawned on Spike, today was--
“Princess Celestia is coming to visit Ponyville to celebrate her birthday! How could we even forget about such a momentous occasion! We must start making plans and preparing the town for such an event! Do we even have a guest list, or supplies, or--”
Spike lazily clamped his hand over the muzzle of his surrogate mother and replied, “Relax Twi, I already took care of it whilst you were busy trying to write a letter to Princess Celestia...”.
Twilight took a brief moment to recollect her thoughts on the strange and bizarre day she had with one Lyra Heartstrings and her harassing the town's time keeper, Time Turner, at least that's what she believed his name to be.
However, the strange thing about that day was the bizarre screwdriver(?) badly hidden under the shade of his hat, and the constant appearances of the ditzy, yet lovable, mailpony Derpy Hooves.
The lesson that day was to lay off the Blueberry Muffins.
“But Spike, how did you manage th--”, Twilight began, her curious senses tingling at the sudden adaptability of her young ward, despite his seemingly former apathy for direct and orderly conduct in regards to cleanliness, hygiene and organization.
Thankfully, Spike cut off her tirade with a dismissive wave of his clawed hand by saying, “I didn't plan this, you did... c'mon Twi, who else plans an event and prepares a backup plan in case they forget in the way that you did!”.
A humble smile on his face, the dragon grabbed his broom and started his morning chores in preparation for what might be a very long day.
Twilight, however, was too stunned to even think of doing anything that required conscious thought. Apart from uttering the words;
“Whoa... I am good...”.
(>^_^)><(^_^<)
“Cock-a-doodle-doo!” said Scootaloo as she belly-flopped into Apple Bloom's bed (with the red-maned southern filly still on the bed of course) much to the owner's chagrin.
“What in tarnation are ya doin'? Get offa' me, ya dodo!”, Apple Bloom exclaimed, whilst trying to wrestle the Pegasus filly off of her bed.
Now it was Scootaloo's turn to get annoyed, “How many times do I have to tell you... Stop calling me things I don't know the meaning of!”.
With a smirk on her facial features, Apple Bloom does a quick flip and pins Scootaloo down on the bed with her face inches above her friend's. Apple Bloom's eyelids start to flutter and her lips (now dangerously close to Scootaloo) form her last insult to her filly-friend in a tone that could make a full-grown stallion blush.
“An' how many times do Ah have to tell ya to buy a dictionary...”
Her wings as alert as her eyes are, Scootaloo moves in closer to Apple Bloom in an attempt to get her lips to finally touch hers--
When an all too familiar cough ruins the moment...
Now don't get her wrong, Scootaloo loved Sweetie Belle to bits (not as much as Apple Bloom, but I digress...) however it seems that Sweetie has been rather sour with the turn of events, ever since Apple Bloom confessed her, albeit (considered by Equestrian standards) unusual, feelings to Scootaloo. Ms Belle has started to become rather irritated very easily whenever her friends have their “special” moment.
Time has passed quickly for all of Ponyville, including the crusaders, all of them have their cutie marks and are quickly adjusting to life with their special talents. Sweetie Belle is getting groomed for a deal with a record label that is owned by both Octavia and Vinyl Scratch (known to her fans as DJ-P0N3).
Rumours have spread around that they were lovers, but Sweetie Belle didn't believe for one second that the beautiful, talented and all-around amazing Miss Octavia would ever be a filly-fooler. Vinyl on the other hand, well that's another story.
Apple Bloom is taking an apprenticeship from Big Macintosh in Construction (which he minored in, he majored in Economics, who knew?) and she is learning more and more about what her cutie mark stands for as each day goes by.
Scootaloo is taking some flight lessons from one of the Wonderbolts, but you'll never guess which one. This Wonderbolt has taught her some amazing aerial manoeuvres that could easily accompany her amazing scooter stunts. But of course Apple Bloom will always worry about her, for no reason...
But of course all of this irrelevant now because Sweetie Belle had something to say.
“Now while I appreciate you guys wanting to bump uglies with your beautiful selves, I still have to remind you that this is a sleepover and not a 'sleep-with-her'... Furthermore, I'm really grateful that you had me over, Apple Bloom, but for now I would like some sleep...”.
With that, Sweetie Belle laid her head back down to rest, only for her eyes to stare up at a somewhat pissed off Pegasus, “What the hay is your problem? You never had a problem with it when we were at my place!”.
Sweetie Belle merely sighed and replied, “That's because Dash wasn't home and she wouldn't care anyway... The difference now is that I am tired--”
“But what does that have to do with--”
“And Applejack, her older sister who is a Faustian, is in the other room...” Sweetie Belle finished firmly, pointing an irritated hoof at the door, which probably leads to a location near Applejack's room. “They have a tendency to believe that your special somepony should be your future husband/wife... In this case you should have your future husband and instead you have a filly-friend...”.
This got Scootaloo angry, “And why is that such a bad thing? I love Apple Bloom more than any other colt could and even more than that!”. Apple Bloom couldn't help but let a joyous tear come to her eye as she heard the love of her life utter such bold words in her defence.
Sweetie Belle, on the other hand, was unimpressed. “I understand that you care for her deeply, but that's not the case here! They won't see it that way, all they will ever see is something akin to an abomination--”.
“Damn it, stop using words I don't understand!” Scootaloo snapped, reading to strike Sweetie Belle with an infuriated hoof, much to the woe of Apple Bloom and the surprise of Sweetie Belle.
Soon enough, she wouldn't be the only one that's surprised.
The door to Apple Bloom's room was opened firmly, and an angered work horse stomped into the room, southern drawl ready to lay down the law;
“What in tarnation is goin' on here! Ah want an explanation right now!”.
Scootaloo quickly leapt off of Sweetie Belle and the aforementioned filly straightened herself up and dusted herself off.
Apple Bloom was quick to leap to the defence of her friends, “Wait sis, Ah can explain--”.
Sweetie Belle sighed again and laid her hoof on Apple Bloom's shoulder, “It's my fault, Miss Applejack, I was having a silly argument with Scootaloo... I apologize if it disturbed your sleep and would understand if you wouldn't want a troublemaker like me over here anymore...” she spoke sadly, with voice cracks pitching in here and there, all the while mustering the best puppy dog look she could manage.
Applejack's glare broke down after such a look and she replied, “That's mighty fine, sugahcube, as long as you told the truth, s'all that matters...”, with that she left the three fillies behind with a small smile.
When she entered her room, however, she then angrily punched the pillow on her bed as she swore she would hunt down that filly...
“How dare she speak of us Faustians as if we were Gaians! That filleh, needs ta be put in her place!"
Realizing what she just blurted aloud, Applejack covered her mouth to stop a string of horse-related profanities escaping, she then took a deep breath and calmed herself down. After all, there was no point in getting riled up for nothing, especially if there is a big event coming up tomorrow...
It's not everyday Princess Celestia turns 3000 years old and finally becomes a Queen!
<(= _ =)>
Hi guys! I'm just so excited about tomorrow that I decided to write about it! It's gonna be so fun, we'll have a great super-duper big party, with cake, party games, punch, more cake and caaaaaaaa~
Pinkie! What are you doing? Get back in the story!
Oh, ehehehehe~
“Sorry, author!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed as she completed her jump through my computer screen back into the brightly lit atmosphere that was her bedroom in Sugarcube Corner.
“Hey author, that was barely punctuated y'know... Also, don't you think that the Scootaloo is a chicken joke is overdone?” Pinkie Pie said with a critical expression plastered all over her face, of which I'm choosing to ignore lest I find myself tempted to erase her from the story.
Gulping slightly at the pseudo threat that was hidden in the text, Pinkie Pie then turned her attention back to her pet alligator and lifted him high up into the air whilst shouting, “Guess what, Gummy?”, to which the pet alligator simply tilted his head to the left, “It's Princess Celestia's birthday tomorrow! And it's also gonna be her corn nation as well!”.
“I believe you mean, coronation, Pinkamena...” corrected her cultured younger sister, Octavia, as she regally trotted into Pinkie's room, taking a moment to soothe her aching head she continued, “And whilst I am rather excited that this event is taking place, and that we have been invited... I would much rather you curb your enthusiasm until tomorrow so that we can get some rest and--”.
“There's gonna be balloons and cupcakes, and so much fun!” Pinkie Pie started jumping up and down uncontrollably as the thought of partying hard was too much for her to bare with.
Octavia sighed, “You aren't even paying attention to what I'm saying right now, are you?”.
Her answer, however, came in the form of her mare-friend, Vinyl Scratch. “C'mon Octy, lighten up a little, she's just being Pinkie! Besides, I'm stoked for this too, it's one of those things you'll never see again!”.
Octavia let a ghost of a smile float across her face as she replied, “Why yes that is true, Celestia's 3000th birthday and her coronation... We are going to be the first ponies to be able to address her as Queen Celestia! Sounds riveting!”.
Vinyl Scratch and Pinkie Pie stopped where they were and scratched their chins and simultaneously replied, “Well that and-- We are going to be unveiling our ultimate creation!”.
They both dashed off and returned with a huge metallic tank which seemed to have three subwoofers connected at different points, Octavia could only hyperventilate as she attempted to make sense of how the tank could even stand on the wooden floorboards of this room, let alone how they got it in here so fast.
Then she took a good look at the thing and one question came into her mind, “W-what is that thing?”, Octavia eventually fell onto her haunches as she subconsciously believed that this thing was going to run her over if she didn't back off slightly.
With two maniacal grins on her friends' faces and a dramatic gasp from both of them, Octavia could only prepare for the worst.
“This is...” started Vinyl Scratch, leaving Pinkie to follow up with;
“The Party Tank! Designed to make your party 60% louder and 20% cooler!”.
Vinyl Scratch finding her voice again, also joined in on the description of the mechanism, “Not only that, but it now comes with-- Not one...” she paused as she pointed at one of the sub-woofers, then she leaped over to the next one as she said, “Not two...”.
Then she finally stopped on top of the final sub-woofer which was situated atop of the tank and exclaimed, “But three bucking Bass Cannons!”.
“B-bass Cannon?”Octavia stuttered, nearly prompted to faint from the mention of Vinyl Scratch's most devastating weapon that could only be rivalled by Pinkie's Party Cannon version 2.0, and now there was three of them?
Well, at the very least it couldn't possibly get any worse...
“It also comes with three Party Cannons! Version 2.0 of course...”
Equestria was doomed.
<{(OvO)}> <--{Who?}
Rarity was willing to get some sleep, however that was ruined as soon as she heard a knock on the door, wondering who it was she quickly trotted to the door and called out to the knocker.
“It's me...” the voice replied, immediately Rarity knew who it was and she quickly fumbled with the locks to reveal a rather flustered owl with a scroll in its talons and a look of urgency spread across its facial features.
“Owloysius, please come in...” Rarity acknowledged the owl with a grateful smile on her face, after the owl flew in she quickly dashed off into the kitchen and started to let the kettle boil, before elegantly returning to the room.
However, staying true to her element, Rarity offered some tea to the owl.
“I'm afraid I must decline, and you have no need to refer to me by the name my owner gave me Rarity, she's not around to hear what I have to say to you...”, the owl chuckled as he 'sat' down on the fashionetta's sofa.
Normally Rarity would object to an animal sitting on her sofa, however this was a very special case, “I apologize Black Crystal, it's a force of habit that I've become all too accustomed too...”.
At this the owl chuckled and replied, “Then perhaps this form would help...”, and with that the owl suddenly changed form into a handsome stallion with a white coat, perfectly coiffed blonde mane and somewhat broad shoulders.
Normally this would be a dream for most mares, however Rarity scowled at the changeling's choice, “Honestly? I preferred the owl...”. The changeling imitated a look of mock hurt and disdain, and even pouted for a bit before obliging and returning to the previous owl form.
Rarity smiled slightly, before taking on a look of concern again, “Now... there was something you wanted to tell me?”, the changeling removed the somewhat playful smirk it had on and sighed before handing her the scroll. Rarity opened the seal and quickly read the scroll, before a dramatic gasp left her lips, “Oh no, this is horrible!”, she then turned her head frantically towards the changeling, “But... How can this be?”.
The changeling shook its head solemnly, “I'm not sure, but it certainly raises concern... She wouldn't write a letter to you unless she felt it was urgent...”.
Rarity let a smirk etch onto her face at the changeling's behaviour, “She? Aren't you being too familiar with her highness?”. To her surprise, Black Crystal merely shrugged and replied;
“When you are the captain of the Scouting and Espionage Unit, you get away with a couple of things...”. The changeling then formed a smirk of its own and awaited the shock of that statement to sink into its unicorn friend.
“W-what? But how did you--” Rarity began, however a loud knock at the door of the boutique interrupted her and Black Crystal automatically knew what that meant...
A sigh escapes the changeling's lips, “I believe that my time here is far spent and I must regretfully bid you adieu... However, me and my unit will keep in touch...”, with a flap of its wings it prepares to take off, but not before saying, “Oh, and take care of 'Opal' would you?”.
Rarity merely nodded in affirmation, as she gazed fondly upon her cat, the loud knock took her out of her trance once again and this time it was accompanied by a loud shout of “Rarity, it's me!” and the infamous southern drawl that was laced within the hurried words, made Rarity not think more than twice about rushing to the door and asking;
“Applejack? What ever is the matter, darling?” her accent quickly placed back on by her superior acting skills, however the one thing she didn't prepare for was the news Applejack brought...
“Rarity, ya might wanna come with me fer this one, it's about Sweetie Belle...”
(¬_¬) (^_^;)
“Alright you guys, break it up! There's no point in fighting each other, no matter what it is!” if not for the brash and somewhat obnoxious tone that accompanied those words, Rarity thought they'd have belong to someone else.
Yet here she was, Rainbow Dash, breaking up a fight instead of encouraging or even starting one.
Of course, no matter who it was, the two fillies in question were never gonna behave themselves. “She started it, she kept calling me things that I don't know the meaning of! How on earth am I supposed to understand what a heathen meant?” Rarity heard Scootaloo yell from the distance.
“Ah think you can tell whut happened here...” Applejack said with a grimace on her face. Rarity didn't think it was possible, but after letting Sweetie Belle in on the fact that Applejack was a Faustian, she started to make false accusations based on that and then started using those harmful words in her vocabulary to try and help her friend.
If you question Rarity's accuracy, then you might want to remember that she is her sister and knows her better than anyone. Despite this, Rarity could only hypothesize that this was what happened, she needed more concrete proof...
“But that is exactly what a Faustian would say if they find out you've been filly-fooling!”
And there it was, her proof...
“Sweetie Belle!”
All of a sudden, the fighting stopped and all eyes were on Rarity as she trotted up to her sister and glared into her eyes, “What in Equestria do you think you're doing?”.
Sweetie Belle gulped and then quickly went onto explain why they were fighting, hiding that Apple Bloom and Scootaloo were filly-fooling of course, but not leaving out any other details.
Rarity couldn't help but notice that Sweetie Belle would occasionally glance at Apple Bloom and Scootaloo whilst talking about filly-fooling, and Rarity immediately knew what this entire conversation (and the argument beforehand) were about. She looked at Applejack to see if she picked up any hints, but alas while Applejack was smart and could tell a lie from a truth. She never really had a keen eye for detail, and almost always took what she heard at face value.
Rainbow Dash, however, was not limited in that regard and was too blunt to keep a reserved demeanour about it, “Hey, you wouldn't happen to be talking about Apple Bloom and Scootaloo, are you?”.
Whilst Rarity would usually apprehend Rainbow Dash for asking such a question, not to mention how blunt and tactless her tone was, she couldn't help but thank her in this situation as it helped affirm her theory.
Sweetie Belle was sweating buckets, a silly argument between two fillies had now evolved into her own personal interrogation at the hooves of her older sister, her friend's older sister and her other friend's surrogate sister. She gulped slowly and was about to open her mouth, when a yellow hoof rested on her shoulder, and the owner of said hoof whispered in her ears, “Don't you worry about me, Sweetie Belle, Ah'll be fine...”.
She then looked at the adult mares that stood before her and suddenly started to sweat as well, “Ah hope...”, she managed to mutter to herself, after taking one last look at the barn she was about to open her mouth but then the last of the crusaders decided to interrupt in a similar fashion that she just did to Sweetie Belle.
“I'm a filly-fooler!” Scootaloo exclaimed, her throat felt sore from all the shouting she did today, “And I don't care who knows it! Banish me to the depths of Equestria for all I care! Just... leave Apple Bloom alone...” she stole one last glance at the filly she loved oh so dearly, “It's not her fault that I love her...”.
Now whilst Apple Bloom and Scootaloo have been courting each other for a reasonable amount of time, they have never once said the “L” word to each other... Despite the predicament they were both in, they still felt that using that word would've been a taboo that neither pony could afford. However, Scootaloo no longer cared about the repercussions of her actions any more, as long as Apple Bloom was safe and sound there was nothing else in the world that meant more than that... Except maybe beating Rainbow Dash in a race and having her idol congratulate her for doing so;
But that dream will probably just stay that way, because nopony would want their sibling (or any family member for that matter) to be associated with a filly-fooler...
And as she expected, Applejack hoisted her up by her forehooves and slammed her against the wall of her barn. “Whut did you just say, sugahcube?”, her tone was dangerously low, her drawl was thick and her eyes narrowed with what seemed to be a curious mixture of impatience and pure undying hatred.
“That I'm... a filly-fooler?” Scootaloo squeaked, the pressure of the strong earth pony's hooves pressing up against her ribcage was clearly too much for the teenage filly to handle.
Rainbow Dash had seen enough.
“Hey! Let her go, you--” Rainbow Dash began, but Rarity was there in a flash before Rainbow could even take a step towards Applejack. Rarity said nothing, but she shook her head slowly as if it were a sign to tell her not to intervene. Rainbow was about to argue against her, but Rarity was adamant, and Rainbow Dash had no choice but to take a seat and see what Applejack was going to do to her little sister.
'Wait, where did that come from?'
Meanwhile Applejack still had Scootaloo up against the wall of her barn. She moved in closer to the teenage filly, her warm breath crawled onto Scootaloo's face as she said, “Not that, whut did you say after all that...”.
Scootaloo thought long and hard about what she was saying, it didn't take long before it clicked. With a defiant look on her face, Scootaloo mustered up all her courage and sharply replied;
“That I love her!”.
How quickly and readily she said that surprised everyone there, including Scootaloo, however she didn't show it in her face and she wasn't about to, lest she give Applejack any leverage. Applejack's expression sobered slightly before she turned to face Apple Bloom and asked her, “Apple Bloom, do ya love this filly?”.
Apple Bloom stared at her sister, then at Scootaloo, she took one final look at her sister before mustering up her courage and exclaiming, “Yes Ah do! An' ain't nopony gonna tell me otherwise!”.
With that Applejack let the ghost of a smile creep on her face (but only Rainbow Dash and Rarity could see that), she then turned back to Scootaloo and said, “Well then... Ah guess it's about time we put this filly-fooler outta her misery!”.
“No!” both Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom exclaimed.
Applejack raised her hoof in a threatening manner, as if she was preparing to strike poor Scootaloo in the face, Scootaloo seeing this put her hooves up to guard her face and prepared for the worst beating she'd ever have in her life.
What she didn't expect was Applejack so set her down back on the ground, and offer her hoof for a hoofshake, all the while saying the words;
“Ah give you mah blessing...”.
(>O.o)> <--{Wut?} {Exactly!}--> (^_^)
A knock was heard on the door of Fluttershy's cottage, the owner of said knock was wearing a light brown cape that all but hid the creature's shapely figure.
But this isn't clop-fiction so I'll cut straight to the chase...
Inside of the homely hut was a rather large red stallion, with a big green apple for a cutie mark and a messy but tamed orange mane.
He goes by the name of Big Macintosh, but most ponies call him Big Mac, why he's here in the house of Fluttershy was no secret.
He was here to drop off a home delivery for Fluttershy who was feeling rather peckish.
Why she wanted it at this hour was both confusing and bizarre for the large stallion, what he didn't expect was Fluttershy to waltz down her stairs wearing a silky satin dress that showed off her shapely thighs and formed perfectly around her curvy flank.
But this still isn't a clop-fic, so we'll just leave the rest up to the reader's imagination, shall we?
“Why hello Big Mac, do you have a delivery for me?” Fluttershy spoke with a sultry tone, laced with the hormonal glow of a thousand fantasies formed by a teenager that just watched his first p--
Knock, knock, knock!
Another knock on the door again, and both parties were thankful for the interruption, but for different reasons.
Fluttershy merely chuckled at how nervous Big Mac was and turned her attention to the door, “Who is it?”.
Through the solid door of the hut the two ponies heard a familiar voice say, “'Who is it?' I hear you cry, well it is I, Fluttershy...”. Another giggle escaped from Fluttershy (making Big Mac sweat bullets...) as she replied, “Come in Zecora...”.
With that, Zecora entered the hut wearing 'nothing' but a dominatrix outfit and some nip--
Not a clop-fic! I swear this is not a clop-fic!
Clearly seeing that the situation was slowly getting out of hoof, Big Mac took some cautious steps backward, but found himself backed up against a rather sturdy wooden wall, and just as it seemed like all hope was lost...
An unlikely interruption in the form of a blond-maned mailmare, crashing through a window with a letter held in a shaky hoof, was enough to halt the unsatisfied lust of the pink-maned pegasus and her Zebrarian associate. Well, at least long enough for Big Mac to escape.
Fluttershy sighs at the daring escape of the red stallion and turns her head to her companion, “What a shame, it seems he escaped...” with that, she drew herself closer to Zecora and slowly dragged her tongue along the Zebra's muzzle, “No matter, we can always just entertain ourselves...”.
But because this is not a clop-fic, we'll move elsewhere, shall we?
{>¬_¬}> /)^3^(\
The day before was riddled with all of the usual bizarre and unusual stuff that made living in Ponyville worthwhile, however, life for the citizens there was about to change as they were graced by their powerful and all-knowing leader at the crack of dawn.
The lavender unicorn, who is also a protege of this ruler , was the first to express her surprise at the earliness of her ruler, “Princ-- I mean, Queen Celestia! What brings you here to our humble town so early? The coronation is not for another two hours... We have barely even finished--”, a regal white hoof stopped her student's feeble attempt to buy time for her kin.
“Alas, my student, I have found it to be a nuisance to go through this entire farce in order to invoke the right to call myself what I rightfully am... Queen and omnipotent ruler...” Celestia finished, with a proud and unfamiliar smirk latched onto her muzzle.
Twilight the found herself being blasted backwards and the ever-imposing figure of Princess Luna stood in the way of Twilight and Princess Celestia, “Stop this blasphemous madness at once, sister! This is unbecoming of a queen!”.
This only led to the confusion of the Ponyville folk, and the masse of their trademarked conspirational whispers. However all confusion was averted and thrown away when Celestia belted out a boisterous maniacal laugh, that could be considered completely out-of-character for her, “Blasphemy? You poor foalish whelp... I am God!”.
Luna gritted her teeth whilst angrily muttering, “Divina Angelus Celestia--”,
“Wow, full name, you're so scary sis!”,
“I am warning you--”
“Would you care to hurry up and tell me what this warning is? I have no time for such petty talk--”
“I will end you, impudent foal!” Luna shrieked as she formed a sword with her magic and swung for Celestia's head, only managing to stare in shock as the sword breezed past her mane and de-materialized. Luna then tripped over her own feet and realized that Celestia had subdued her with a rope of magic, she managed to fire off a beam of magic that temporarily stunned Celestia, in turn breaking her concentration and allowing Luna to escape.
“Hear our cry, citizens of Ponyville! By direct order of Princess Stella Illuminare Luna, everypony must evacuate immediately!” Luna decreed in her royal canterlot voice. That caused everypony to panic and run for the hills, leaving behind Princess Luna and the Elements of Harmony.
Through gritted teeth, Luna muttered, “That goes for you too, Twilight Sparkle... You and your friends must leave...”. At the sight of Twilight and her friends, fiercely shaking their heads in disagreement, Luna perservered, “Prithee, please listen to me for once... This is not the Celestia you once knew and loved, allow me to take the burden of ridding Equestria of this monstrous impostor once and for all!”.
“There is no way in good conscience I can do that, Luna...” Twilight firmly answered as her friends quickly darted to the side of Luna, ready to assume a battle position.
Calling out from the far left side, Rainbow Dash added onto Twilight's initial statement, “That's right! I wouldn't be staying true to my element if I didn't do what was best for both Equestria and fought to protect it!”.
At the far right side, Applejack nodded in agreement before putting her own piece in, “An' in all honesty? Ah jus' wanted to have a good ol' tussle with Celesty here... Long overdue in mah opinion...”.
Rarity couldn't help but agree with her friends, “I believe that it was about time that I gave a generous beating to someone who deserves it, and someone usurping her highness's reputation is ghastly and dreadful, and deserves nothing but the pummelling of a lifetime!” she finished with a somewhat aggressive tone in her voice.
Fluttershy managed to get her game face on as well, “And I thought it would be rather kind of me to join you so I could--” but after seeing the glare coming from Luna, she shrank away from the navy blue Alicorn and simply stopped talking.
Luna's glare soon disappated, and it was replaced by a smirk as she replied, “Very well then, in order to help me vanquish this foe I need you to retrieve something for me...” and with that, Luna opened a portal that was purple-black in colour and very misty in texture.
“Through here, lies all the answers that you seek...” Luna added, with a smile on her face.
The mane six then leaped into the portal without abandon (apart from Fluttershy who was pushed in by Rainbow Dash) and Twilight Sparkle who stayed around to ask one last question, “But wait, what about you?”.
Without warning, Twilight was again telekinetically thrown (only into the portal this time), as she felt the portal's “doors” shut, she started pounding on them with tears in her eyes as she exclaimed, “Luna!”.
Back in Ponyville...
Celestia simply chuckled at the action her younger sister just took, “You trapped them in the Shadow Realm, just so you could valiantly fight me to the death alone? How bold, diabolical yet foalish of you to do so... I would've been impressed, but we both know why that's not the case...”.
Luna merely trotted up to her sister, face-to-face, and snarkily replied, “Because the mood triggered by your delayed estrus cycle has caused you to be a stuck-up bitch?”, a solitary hoof struck Luna hard in the face and sent her flying, but the grin on her bruised face, and the infuriated grimace of her opponent's told a different story.
“Very well sister, seeing as talking civilly won't do, let us begin our bout, perhaps I can remind you of your manners!”.
