Twilight lit her horn, casting a thick barrier between her and the cackling necromancer standing at the forefront of the crumbling tomb. “Get behind me while we think of a new plan,” she called, motioning for her friends to fall back behind her shield.
Her five terrified friends huddled close behind the alicorn and her blazing horn, with even the brave Rainbow Dash reluctantly falling behind.
“Fools! No barrier in existence can save you from my magic!” Cackled the robed unicorn standing at the foot of a lectern. Her stance was tall and unafraid, the multilayered shield obscuring her features slightly. “The powers of Nel-Zad flow through me and with his strength I will destroy you fools and usher in an age of true darkness!” The necromancer threw back her head and laughed, revealing a long flowing black mane that cascaded over her grey shoulders.
“What's the plan, Twilight?” Rainbow Dash asked nervously, glancing up at the laughing necromancer standing mere feet away.
“I don't know, her barrier spells seem endless and keep us from getting close. I don't like it, but we have to bring down the entire tomb, Applejack buck that-” Twilight ducked suddenly, narrowly dodging a magic bolt that had somehow pierced her shield.
“What, do you really think I’m just going to sit here and let you come up with some sort of plan?” the necromancer asked, her teal eyes flashing with maleficent intent.
Pinkie Pie shrugged. “Kinda, we were hoping you'd get caught up in the usual bad guy monologuing and evil laughing bit.”
Rarity jabbed an elbow into the pink mare’s side. “Pinkie, that was supposed to be a secret.”
The party pony blushed, covering her mouth with a hoof. “Whoopsie.”
“Don't worry Pinkie, I’ll-” Twilight started, dodging as a bolt of sickly green and black slammed into the ground where she had been standing only a second earlier. With a growl of annoyance she dismissed her shield, realizing just how useless it truly was.
“I will not be swept aside like those ignoramuses that came before me. Prepare to feel the touch of the void, fools!” The necromancer flipped through the pages of her massive tome, and began a strange chant. Her voice became unnaturally deep, her words blurring together as they reverberated through the room.
The effect was immediate, with everyone but Twilight taking a step back, their fur standing on end as their teeth began to chatter. “I don't know, Twilight, maybe we should just get out of here,” Rainbow Dash whimpered, eying the staircase behind them.
“Yeah, I kinda like my soul bein’ in my body,” Applejack added.
“No! We can't let her win! Just pull yourself together! We are the elements of harmony!” Twilight cried.
She turned on her hoof and ignited her horn, pouring all the power she could muster into the greatest lightning bolt spell she had ever cast. Static electricity danced through the air and centred around her horn, which had grown so bright it was nearly blinding.
Her horn flared one last time and with its release, the lightning bolt exploded from her horn and screeched across the room before pounding into the barriers that had held the elements of harmony at bay. Electricity cracked and magical walls exploded into millions of pieces and for a moment the necromancer’s eyes went wide, a sliver of doubt worming into her mind for the first time since the fight began. Twilight dropped to the ground, her horn dull and her magic almost completely expended from the prolonged battle.
Between them and the necromancer stood no barrier, nothing to hold the six friends from saving themselves and the world. Twilight’s friends all charged at once, seeing their way out from the almost crushing fear bearing down on them. Even Fluttershy ran galloping at the wide eyed necromancer, desperate to end this terrifying adventure with her soul still in her body. The necromancer sped up her chant, words spilling out of her mouth as fast as she could read them. Though they had been across the room from the evil spell caster, Rainbow Dash was as fast as ever and within a matter of seconds she was mere feet away, hoof raised to strike the evil unicorn.
“Klaatu barada nikto!” The necromancer cried suddenly, raising her hooves high above her head in her moment of triumph.
Rainbow Dash who had been only a few feet away from the mad necromancer was the first to be hit by the wave of green and black smoke that rushed out from the necromancer. The second the smoke billowed across her body the mare fell, her lifeless body skidding across the ground. The necromancer stepped out of the way as the corpse tumbled end over end, until it finally came to a stop against the lectern with a soft thump.
“Rainbow!” Fluttershy cried, her eyes wet with tears.
The pegasus made it a mere foot before the wave hit her, making her tumble to the ground, her eyes glassy and distant before she could even whisper her death rattle. The mare’s body tumbled to a stop next to Rainbow Dash’s as if reaching out to her friend even in death.
Rarity and Applejack were a bit further back, giving them mere milliseconds before the wave hit them. Noticing they were out of time and had no escape, the two mares embraced one last time before they too fell to the ground like a pair of puppets with their strings cut. Pinkie Pie was second last, her entire body contorted strangely as she tried to jump over the wave, only to crash to the cold stone like the rest. Her body eventually came to rest on her back, her limbs splayed in all directions and a confused expression on her face.
Twilight’s eyes went wide and she had little more than a second before the wave hit her as well. With her last moments she closed her eyes tight, tears pouring down her face, her thoughts going out to her friends, wondering if they would meet again in the next life. Then she too fell, as the concussive wave of force finished its deadly propagation, shaking the very foundations of the tomb. Stone work shattered, chunks of the wall and ceiling fell, making the necromancer worry if she had accidentally doomed herself as well. All around her the pottery and few pews still semi-intact after their centuries of misuse lay broken and shattered by the powerful spell. After a few seconds of rumbling, punctuated by the sound of loose stones clattering off the ground, everything suddenly grew still.
In the silence the necromancer cracked a wild, evil smile, her chest heaving from the recent exertion and her mood lifted by the fact that she was not about to be buried under several hundred tons of stone and earth. “I won! I can't believe I won!”
The necromancer squealed in delight before clapping a hoof over her mouth. “You are a necromancer and herald Nel-Zad, you do not squeal like filly.”
Hopping down from her lectern she turned towards several green tinted soul jars sitting behind her, happy to find that five of the six seemed to be filled with a colored light. The farthest to the left had a blue light that bounced around inside its container, trying to escape. Beside it a yellow light sat at the furthest back, trembling against the glass. The white light next to it sat still, slowly turning in a circle. The pink light spun in circles chasing its tail and lastly the orange light repeatedly rammed itself against the seal at the top, much to the necromancer’s amusement.
“I wouldn't bother trying to escape if I were you. Souls cannot interact with the material world.” she said, pointing at Rainbow Dash’s soul, which responded by ramming itself into the glass between it and the necromancer’s hoof.
The unicorn rolled her eyes and looked down her collection, inspecting the single empty jar. Frowning, she turned the glass jar over, fearing that it had been broken in the fight only to find it was completely unharmed. “Strange,” she muttered.
A groan drew the necromancer’s attention behind her, where Twilight Sparkle was stumbling to her hooves.
“W-what?” the unicorn shrieked. “That's impossible!”
The alicorn shot her opponent a glare. “I won't give up that easily,” she said through gritted teeth.
The necromancer stumbled backwards, nearly tripping over the soul jars in the process. “How did you survive that?”
Twilight just charged her horn, sprinting directly at the terrified necromancer.
The unicorn launched a beam of green and black energy at the attacking mare, only for it to harmlessly pass through her. She gasped, backpedalling several feet. “What are you, a lich?”
Twilight’s horn flared and she popped out of existence, reappearing in a flash directly in front of the unicorn, a hoof already cocked and ready to strike. “I'm a princess, bitch.”
With earth pony magic flowing through her the alicorn delivered a catastrophic uppercut to the other pony’s jaw. It knocked the necromancer into the air before landing on her back, already unconscious before she even hit the ground. The alicorn took one look at the unmoving mare before nodding and turning to the soul jars. A cursory glance told her that her friends were alright, the five lights glowing brightly, and bouncing around happily in their jars.
With a sigh of relief the alicorn picked up the jars with her magic and levitated them over to their corresponding bodies before cracking the seals. Twilight watched as each light faded into its proper body, only allowing herself to breathe a second sigh of relief when life began to return to the former corpses, with Pinkie Pie waking up first, stumbling to her hooves.
“Oh this is going to take forever to get out of my fur,” she remarked, sticking her tongue out as she ran a hoof down her chest only to stop and blink in disbelief. “What the hay… darling please tell me you did not just put me in Pinkie Pie’s body!”
Rarity rose next, rolling her eyes as she did. “Very funny, Pinkie,” she groused, dusting off her hooves.
Pinkie Pie giggled, hopping up to Twilight and hugging her around the shoulder. “Yeah, it was pretty good, wasn't it, you shoulda seen your face Twilight!”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “I should have known.” She hugged Pinkie back, giving the pink mare a gentle squeeze. “I’m glad you girls are alright. The rest of you are in the proper bodies right?”
Fluttershy glanced down at her hooves before nodding.
Applejack did the same before putting her hat back on her head. “Looks like it.”
Rainbow Dash shot into the air, did a quick loop and then smirked. “Yup, still awesome.”
“Whew, thank goodness. I did not want to have to deal with the shenanigans that would have come out of that,” Twilight lamented.
Fluttershy glanced over at the necromancer, her brow furrowing as she looked over her unconcious form. “Are you sure hitting her that hard was necessary, Twilight? It looks like you dislocated her jaw.”
The alicorn tensed slightly. “Fluttershy, she killed you girls.”
The pegasus winced. “I guess she did. At least it didn't hurt though…”
Rainbow Dash scoffed. “Serves her right for not fighting fair.” The pegasus flew over to the unconscious body and horked a loogy on her robe.
Applejack rolled her eyes. “Cut it out, ‘sides we’re gonna have to drag her outta here anyway.”
“Augh fine, but don't expect me to be nice about it,” Rainbow whined.
The earth pony shrugged. “Drag her all the way up the stairs if ya want, or just grab her other leg, will ya?” She hoisted the unicorn up, grunting as she did. “She's heavier than she looks.”
Rainbow Dash grumbled but did as she was told, hauling the unicorn away with a nervous Fluttershy following close behind. “Careful girls, she might have a concussion.”
The pair just grunted and continued to drag the unicorn across the room, ignoring the thump as her head bounced off loose rocks and bits of pottery.
Rarity had finished dusting herself off by then and glanced up to where Twilight still stood near the lectern. “Is there any other world ending horror that we have to stop down here? Because I’d rather like to get out of this nasty old tomb.”
Twilight nodded slowly, her gaze lingering over the black tome standing atop the lectern. “Yeah, I’ll meet you girls up top in a second, I wanna check something out.”
Rarity nodded and turned, following the others closely, imagining how good a bath would feel right about now.
Pinkie seemed about to follow her before running up to Twilight and giving her another brief but squishy hug. “Thanks for saving us, Twilight, and for the record I don't think you are a leech.”
The alicorn chuckled. “She called me a lich. Which is a form of undead that house their souls in objects. Which is just silly, as I’m already immortal.” She smirked. “Besides, liches can't eat anything which means I wouldn't be able to enjoy your baking and that's not something I’m willing to give up.”
Pinkie smiled back. “Good! Because when we get home I am going to throw the biggest, wediedbutnowwereokay party ever!”
The party pony bounced away, following the rest of her friends up the winding staircase that lead to the surface.
Rather than following the rest of her friends Twilight grabbed the black tome and whisked it away to her pocket dimension. The alicorn trotted after her friends, meeting a curious Pinkie Pie who poked her head out from the stairwell.
“Forget something?” she asked.
Twilight shrugged. “I just grabbed one of the soul jars for study. Now come on.” Twilight trotted past her. “Let's get out of here before this tomb becomes ours.”
Author's Note
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Starless
T Sparkle
Spike threw a clawful of popcorn into his mouth and chewed loudly, making his way down the stairs and walking into Twilight’s laboratory. The dragon wasn't entirely sure why Twilight always
referred to it as her laboratory as there was little more than a few premade focus circles, some books and a single desk, but Spike didn't really care much to ask. Today was different though, today there was a new object in her laboratory, a mirror that had a slight greenish tinge to it stood in the corner. A mirror that Twilight was standing directly in front of, yet didn't show up in.
The dragon placed his popcorn bag on a nearby desk before walking behind the alicorn. Sure enough he showed up on the mirror, but everything else in the room, including Twilight, did not. He waved a claw behind her body, noticing that it showed up on the mirror plain as day. “Spooky,” he muttered.
“Hey, Twi, what's with the mirror?” he asked, only now noticing that Twilight hadn't so much as flinched the entire time he had been down here. “Uh, Twi? You okay?” He waved a claw in front of the alicorn, yet still she didn't do much as blink.
“Code black. Send a priority request for help straight to Celestia,” she said in a flat, toneless voice.
Spike’s eyes lit up and he sprinted over to the desk. “Yes ma’am.” One hastily scrawled letter later and the dragon exhaled a plume of green fire. Consuming the letter and whisking it away to its intended target. “Sent.”
“Would you mind telling me what's going on? You are scaring me, Twilight.” Spike tapped her side, yet the alicorn didn't look away.
“I don't know what's going on, which is why I need to talk to Celestia. She’ll know.” Her features softened slightly. “I’m not in any pain or danger though.”
The dragon tried to smile, happy at least that his caretaker wasn't currently suffering, other than from an intense and apparently all consuming desire to look into a weird mirror. “Whatever you say, Twi…”
He was about to turn and grab his popcorn when a flash of light accompanied by a small explosion made him turn to the centre of the room. Where Celestia now stood with wide panicked eyes, her wings open and ready to move at a moment’s notice. Instantly she scanned the room, her horn ablaze with power, until it settled over the greenish mirror. Her power unexpectedly sizzled and popped, disappearing completely, her panicked expression fading to one of strange calm.
“Spike, please wait up the stairs,” Celestia commanded, looking down at the terrified drake.
“What's going on?” he whispered, glancing nervously at Twilight, who had yet to move.
“It's nothing, I’ll talk to you in a minute. Right now Twilight needs me.” She smiled faintly, placing a hoof on the dragon’s shoulder, filling him with confidence.
“Okay, but after that you are telling me what's going on… right?”
The alicorn nodded. “I promise. Now go, please.”
Spike cast one last glance over his shoulder at the alicorn and the mirror before sighing. “Okay.”
The dragon walked away, unable to bring himself to eat anymore of his popcorn.
When the door clicked shut behind him, Celestia lit her horn and blanketed the room with as many anti-scrying, and anti-noise spells as she knew. After several minutes the alicorn nodded, confident that no one was capable of listening in on them.
With a sigh of pity, Celestia walked next to the alicorn, her reflection appearing in the green mirror. “So, you've learned the truth.”
“What do you mean?” Twilight asked hesitantly, yet despite her curiosity she couldn't help but feel like deep down, a part of her always knew and a terrible sense of deja vu washed through her.
“Activate protocol 1109, recall. Activation code epsilon,” Celestia intoned.
“What does-”
Twilight was no longer in her castle, she wasn't in Ponyville either, nor did it even feel as though she was even in her own mind. She couldn't move, nor summon up a single bit of magic, yet she felt strangely calm about this realization and she felt her eyes being turned around until they faced a familiar alicorn.
The Celestia she saw seemed haggard, deep bags hung under her eyes and scorch marks littered her fur. On her forehead were a pair of goggles, and around her body was thin white lab coat, from which many instruments and odds and ends poked out of.
“Project Dusk, log date 989, June thirty-first.” She pushed the goggles slightly further up her head. “The project has been coming along smoothly over the last several months. The little snag with the visual processing matrix has been worked out surprisingly easily.”
She stepped to the side, revealing a truly massive array of intersecting spell matrices, around which were secondary and tertiary matrices that interwove with the first. “Isn't she beautiful?”
The alicorn sighed, the barest hint of a smile visible due to the angle. “An almost fully sentient artificial magical construct capable of independent thought and reason. Not quite free, she will be capable of problem solving, but will also lack the true creative freedom that comes with free will. True free will is after all, not possible, but this should be close enough for my goals.”
She pointed a hoof to the centre-most ring, which had so many arcane symbols etched into it that Twilight couldn't even make out any individual symbol. “The origin point will serve as the location where she will first manifest.” She gestured outwards to the second and third layer. “The additional layers will generate the spell’s body over several years. The addition of false memories won't be terribly difficult. The Sparkle family has spent century in poor standing and squalor but with their assistance in my plans they will gain the power they seek and give my spell the home it needs. With a fake background and memories in place I will have the perfect assistant to ensure my sister’s safe return in eleven years time.”
The alicorn chuckled, retrieving a flask from somewhere and taking a swig before turning back to Twilight. “If this works, I will have completed the greatest feat in golemancy the world has ever known.”
She sighed, a sad smile spreading across her lips. “It will take sacrifice though, nothing this powerful comes for free after all.” The alicorn retrieve a familiar amulet from outside her view, one that Twilight instantly recognized as the Element of Magic. “Extracting the piece of my magic tied to the element will be a difficult and painful task, but it is necessary to bind the construct to my will and give it the spark from which its own magic can bloom.”
She placed the element on the table directly in front of Twilight. “This should also bind the element to the construct, fooling the elements of harmony into ‘seeing’ that she has a soul.”
The alicorn slowly paced, her features drawing tight as her mind wandered. “This will be difficult to pull off, but I have spent centuries ensuring the right ponies are where they should be and the rest of the elements have already been detected in Ponyville.”
She shook her head, and retrieved the small silver flask before taking another swig, grimacing at the taste. “Manipulating foals is not exactly something I look forward to. Still, it will all be worth it when Lulu returns and the balance is restored.” The alicorn shook her head and made her way over to Twilight before lighting her horn. “As this will be my last log before the experiment is complete I will include this recording into the entity’s memory in case it discovers its origin.” A thin smile crossed her face. “You would be proud of me, Lulu, I even came up with a fitting name for this creature. We always needed somepony to connect us, to act as a counterbalance and third voice and what better symbolism to bridge day and night than Twilight?”
Author's Note
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Starless
T Sparkle
Twilight blinked, her normal bodily sensations suddenly returning her. Yet despite regaining full control of her faculties, she didn't move, merely staring into the space where her reflection should be.
“I’m assuming you found the soul glass during your last battle?” Celestia asked, gesturing to the mirror.
Twilight nodded. “I studied one of the jars in order to discern its soul containment properties and reverse-engineered a mirror that shows individuals and objects that have souls.”
“A commendable invention, Twilight. Do you mind if I bring it back to the castle for study?”
The purple alicorn nodded. “You can, if you answer a question.”
Celestia smiled gently. “Of course, my dear.”
“Do I have… free will?” she asked hesitantly, her gaze falling to her hoof, which she pressed against the glass.
“Sort of.” The alicron sighed. “You have the illusion thereof at least.”
“What exactly do you mean by sort of?”
“You can operate within an accepted set of parameters but to do something truly random is impossible,” Celestia said simply.
Twilight’s heart sank in her chest. “What kind of parameters?”
“Such as the limitation that you cannot do anypony harm unless a refusal to use force would cause more harm.” Twilight’s mind flashed back to the unexpectedly violent reaction she had after discovering that her friends may actually perish. “You also can't harm yourself in any way. There are more, but those two are the most prominent guiding principles that control your actions.”
Twilight stared down at her hoof, conjuring a small blue flame that she moved closer to her limb. Sure enough, the spell dissipated the moment the heat grew too intense, her horn sputtering and the spell falling apart. “This is really happening, isn't it? I’m not a pony, I’m not even alive.”
The alicorn leaned against the sentient spell, extending a wing over her side and pulling her close. “You are alive, Twilight, you simply came into being in a different manner than most individuals.”
White hot anger exploded in the golem’s mind. “I’m not real! Don't you get it! I’m a fake!” The golem lashed out with a hoof, intent on shattering the mirror, only for her hoof to stop an inch before it hit.
“You are not fake. Everything you've experienced since becoming my protege has actually happened and your family does genuinely love you.” Celestia pulled the golem a little closer, squeezing her gently. “Your difference does not define you, Twilight.”
“No!” The golem moved to shove the alicorn back, only to find her hooves lacked the strength to move the alicorn. “I’m nothing! Don't you see? I’m just a thing, an object!”
Celestia sighed, taking a step back to allow the frantically breathing golem the space it desired. “Twilight, please-”
“Don't you dare! You created an entity that is not capable of free will, but gave it enough intelligence to know what its missing. You have no moral high ground here!” Tears of anger streamed down the spell’s face.
The alicorn sighed. “Activate protocol 667, emotional dampening set to twenty-four percent.”
Twilight’s rage bled away, instantly replaced by a growing apathy that clawed at her mind and try as she might she couldn't seem to muster the effort to keep being angry. “Taking away one’s emotions is not the action of a kind pony,” Twilight remarked calmly.
The alicorn winced. “I am sorry about that, Twilight, I will reset it in a moment if you will allow me to speak.” She extended a hoof, which Twilight wearily took. “Twilight, you are like a daughter to me in more ways than you can count, which is why I am giving you a choice, and a moment of clarity to consider such a choice.”
Twilight gripped her former teacher’s hoof tightly, terrified about what she knew was coming next. “What choice?” she asked reluctantly.
“You must decide what you want out of your life. Do you want to continue on with this knowledge of your origin, or would you like me to remove this memory and ensure you wake up never having learned such a secret?” The alicorn smiled, squeezing the sentient spell’s hoof tightly. “No tricks, no programming, you are just as capable of choosing either answer. I promise.”
The deja vu returned with a vengeance, making Twilight consider something she wished she hadn't. With a sigh, she looked up at her creator. “How many times have we done this?”
The alicorn’s features softened. “This would make eight.”
The spell’s features fell slack and she stared off into the distance. “Seven times…” She shook her head slowly. “I choose to forget seven times.”
“You did.” Celestia nodded. “That doesn't mean you can't change that decision now.”
“No.” The golem sighed. “I can't go back to my life knowing what I now know. Even if I did I can't be sure I would ever be happy again.”
The alicorn nodded, pulling the golem into a tight hug, her forelegs squeezing her tightly. “I’m sorry you think that, Twilight, though I know you would find happiness again someday, I will respect your wishes.”
The spell nodded slowly, weakly hugging the alicorn back.
A soft glow began to emanate from the alicorn’s horn, prompting Twilight to close her eyes and wait for the inevitable.
With a flash, the spell fell limp in the alicorn’s embrace. “Activate protocol sixty six. Reset internal clock for forty hours in the past and ready memory for selective erasure.” A solitary tear ran down the alicorn’s face.
Celestia briefly pressed her lips against the golem’s forehead. “Sweet dreams, my daughter.”
A shape stirred in Twilight’s bed, the many covers parting to reveal a bleary eyed purple alicorn. Roused from her slumber hours earlier than usual by a spreading warmth that drew the mare from the confines of her bed. Once free of her too warm blankets, Twilight lay in full view of the morning sun, the light of which felt oddly comforting. The alicorn’s usual dour reaction to waking up early had been dashed, replaced by one of quiet optimism.
Twilight’s smile grew when she glanced out the window, noticing just how beautiful the surrounding countryside was when beheld in the morning light. Memories of the necromancer while still fresh in her mind, seemed to fade as she beheld such a magnificent sunrise.
In the face of such an awe inspiring morning, the alicorn’s smile grew and she knew right then and there, that today was going to be great.
Author's Note
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Michael
Random Reader
Starless
T Sparkle
Halloween 2020 Crossover Special
The sudden flash of a powerful light woke the theatre's inhabitants, shocking them out of their strangely deep slumber. Each one found themselves unable to move, or look away from the spotlight which shone down on the center of the stage, to where a small pony sized hole could be seen. Though the inhabitants of the theatre could see the stage, they could not seem to turn their heads, or look away from the single point of light.
Even still, they could sense that others were nearby, a fact that none of them could confirm as a heavy aura suppressed their magic. This would normally make most of them feel rather terrified, but there was something about the theatre that made them feel strangely at ease. Maybe it was the surprisingly comfortable chairs which seemed to have been custom molded to their unique bodies, or perhaps it was the smell of aged paper and popcorn that lingered in the air.
Either way, the assembled creatures could only watch and wait, which fortunately for them was something they didn't have to do for very long. A faint clunk signalled the activation of an unseen mechanism, and a second later a distant rhythmic thumping could be heard emanating from beneath the stage. After several seconds of near silence the head of a pony could be seen poking out from the hole, followed closely by the rest of their body shortly after.
The pony themself was missing most of the normal attributes of an equestrian citizen, lacking wings, horn, and the larger build most earth ponies sported. Standing only as tall as the average eighteen year old mare, they had a lithe frame, and a smile that lit up the room. Their eyes were a bright green, their fur a resplendent orange, and their mane was a combination of their fur color and a bright red. Done up in a wild looking mohawk, the pony oozed excitement, and reminded most viewers of Pinky Pie. A comparison that only became more apt when they saw that the pony had a multi colored jester’s stick for a cutie mark.
“Welcome, welcome!” shouted the pony, leaping onto the stage the second the floor was complete once more. “To the greatest game of Twilight’s outside of a certain natural born Derpy story.”
The pony all but bounced to the front of the stage, their grin as wide as ever. “I am Jest, and I will serve as your referee and game master for this evening. But before we get into the nitty and or gritty of all that, let's have a joke shall we?”
They cleared their throat. “Did you guys hear about the mathematician who’s afraid of negative numbers? He’ll stop at nothing to avoid them!”
A few creatures laughed, though it was awkward, and came out a little forced.
“I see math jokes do well with you, so here's another,” Jest remarked, straightening an invisible tie. “How many times can you subtract ten from one hundred?”
After a brief moment of silence, the pony grinned and threw up their hooves. “Once! The next time you would be subtracting ten from ninety!”
Their joke was met with a few more laughs, though not many, they were at least a little less forced.
“I guess I’ll save the jokes for when you aren't trapped in your seat. So without further ado, let's get into it,” Jest declared, clopping their hoof twice against the stage and causing the spotlight to vanish. “You are here to play a game, and don't worry its not some sort of stupid cliche death game where if you lose here you die. In fact you wont even remember being here when you are returned to your lives.”
Jest raised a hoof in the air. “But that doesn't mean this can't be both fun, and illuminating. For you see, I will be able to answer any one question the winner of our little game desires.”
“And to answer your next question, yes it will be one hundred percent truthful, and I have complete knowledge on all possible subjects you may ask,” Jest concluded. “So without further ado let's get this game started!”
The pony clopped their hoof twice against the ground, causing the ground to fall away only to emerge again a second later. The stage now had a large poker table as well as several chairs of various sizes, each seemingly designed for a different kind of creature. The second the stage had been set the various audience members felt their bodies start to respond to their commands once more.
Looking around the room, the creatures found that they were surrounded by what could only be described as themselves. Twilights of various shapes and sizes jumped or otherwise hopped out of their seats and began to look around in wonder. Though they were busy looking at one another, they also noticed that there were no exits to the theatre, nor any windows of any kind. The anti magic field remained as oppressive as ever, though the Twilights who were capable of magic found that they could at least use telekinesis.
Only one of the audience members seemed truly alien, and shared only purplish scales with the others. She stood taller than the rest, with great horns which covered the sides of her head and bent up, then down before curving upwards once more. She also had enormous clawed hands, legs which bent backwards after the knee, and a tail that was as long as a normal pony.
She also had keen purple eyes, a thick hide of dark purple scales with two small bumps on her chest serving as the only clue as to her gender. Overall she appeared to be some form of enormous reptile that was clearly out of place amongst the other Twilight’s who appeared mostly normal. Two of whom were alicorns, though one looked visibly stronger, while the other had a strangely empty gaze.
“Great, I bet none of them know morse code either,” muttered the towering lizard who blinked. “Wait, did I just speak normally?”
“Technically you all have different languages since you originate from wholly different realities or time lines, so I figured I’d translate for you,” Jest shouted from the stage. “I’m also ready whenever you are by the way.”
The various Twilights moved slowly, eying one another up carefully, and curiously, with most watching the Twilight in their midst who appeared to have been turned into a demon of some kind. A large black book was bound in silver chains about her neck, and her ethereal mane flickered behind her, shifting from black at her scalp to a light purple at the tips. Stars could be seen within the demon’s hair, though most were too busy staring at the large sword-like horn which protruded from her head.
A horn which was in the shape of a curved blade not unlike a khopesh, an appendage which she was evidently quite adept at carrying if her smooth confident steps were anything to go by. She too looked back at the other creatures, her piercing gaze looking down on them, scouring their very souls and weighing them each individually. Something she didn't have much trouble doing considering she was one of the tallest in the room, her svelte figure allowing her to tower over most other Twilights.
As one they collectively turned away from the demonic Twilight and her shimmering, deep purple fur to a rather strangely gaunt Twilight who towered over all save for the horned lizard among them. Her body was thin, almost skeletal in its appearance, the mare giving off the impression that she wasn't truly alive given just how unnaturally empty her torso appeared to be. She at least had the same cutie mark as the others, though hers shimmered slightly, and the six smaller stars that adorned it were each different colors.
That wasn't what grabbed the eye however, as it was her shattered horn which did just that, making each visitor wince at the sight. Her fur and mane were also significantly darker then the other two more normal looking Twilights who had a much lighter coloration in comparison. She also had an unnaturally deep shadow, and her eyes glowed a menacing purple, from which wisps of purple magic emanated.
The last Twilight among them was perhaps the strangest among them, though it wasn't quite as readily apparent as to why. She was one of the few unicorns among them who at first glance was not either crippled, or had been turned into a different species. That was until they noticed just how strangely well muscled she was, and the way her eyes glowed a bright yellow color.
This Twilight sported an unnaturally long horn and glowing yellow lines which traveled down her body, though most could be seen on her left foreleg. Which was slightly thicker, and wider than the rest of her tree trunk like limbs which clopped audibly against the wooden floor. All who met her gaze felt unnerved by the experience, the pony’s eyes containing a strange alien quality to them that made each creature realize that she was no normal unicorn.
“Done eying one another up like a pack of jackals?” Jest teased as they riffled and shuffled a deck of cards.
“Yes well, pardon me for taking stock of my strange companions,” remarked the demonic Twilight who was the first to climb the stage and take her seat next to Jest.
“You are all quite strange,” remarked the dead eyed Twilight. “Save for you, that is. In your reality did I get a gym membership?”
“Not quite,” remarked the slightly buffer alicorn Twilight. “I did spend the last twenty odd years adventuring and saving the world though.”
“Were you always an alicorn?” questioned the demonic Twilight.
“No. I was a unicorn at one point but after defeating Tirek I was ‘ascended’ if you could call it that,” remarked the alicorn, who found and sat at the seat which seemed to have been designed for her.
“I feel like we should probably go around the table and introduce ourselves, lest we end up wasting time asking one another an endless stream of questions,” declared the alien Twilight who sat on a wider, more reinforced chair.
“Ahh, that does seem like the best idea, though I have more than a few questions about this place that I would like answered first,” stated the undead Twilight.
“Ahh yes. The theatre,” Jest began, raising a hoof. “It is a pocket dimension gifted to me by a close friend. Here I control all facets of reality, all the way down to the subatomic level.”
“Curious,” murmured the demonic Twilight, who placed her chin in her hoof and leaned forward. “Just what are you then?”
“Just a humble entertainer. It is my creator who happens to have the real power here, but we shan't get into that,” Jest assured. “All you need to know is that violence is not allowed, you can leave at any time, though doing so would forfeit your chance at the knowledge I promised.”
“But if we will forget then why should we bother playing?” questioned the dead eyed Twilight.
“If you will forget anyway, why not enjoy yourself, and relish acquiring the answers you seek, if only for a moment?” Jest countered. “Yes it may be fleeting, but that just means there is no reason not to enjoy it while you can.”
“Sounds like a metaphor for life,” murmured the enormous lizard.
“Quite right my friend,” Jest proclaimed. “Now then, why don't you each introduce yourself, starting with the Twilight who suggested you do so in the first place?”
The undead Twilight shifted uncomfortably in her seat. “My name as you likely already guessed is Twilight and in my world, universe, timeline or whatever, Celestia rules Equestria with an iron hoof.”
“Did she experiment on you as well?” questioned the buff alicorn.
“No, though she did have my mother, and technically me killed,” replied the undead.
“I am so sorry,” whispered the great lizard, who tentatively touched the undead pony’s shoulder.
“It's fine,” muttered the other Twilight. “After that I fled into the Everfree, learned necromancy and have been steadily helping my friends all while I uncover many of the world’s secrets.”
“Fascinating. I assume necromancy can do more than simply make zombies in your world,” inquired the dead eyed Twilight.
The undead Twilight nodded. “It is also called soul magic and can be used for a great many things.”
“Which we don't have time to get into,” Jest added pointedly.
“Yes well, I suppose I should go next then,” stated the dead eyed Twilight. “My given name is Twilight, though if I am being honest I am not sure why I am here.”
“Why do you say that?” asked the lizard.
“Because I am spell, and am not truly alive, nor was I born in the traditional sense,” stated the Twilight. “If I had my magic I could show you what I mean, but in my reality I was created by Celestia as a stand in for Sunset Shimmer. The princess needed someone who could wield the element of magic after her former student ran away and to that end she implanted within me a spark of her magic in order to give me life, as well as control my actions.”
“Yeesh, and I thought it was bad that my Celestia created me in a more metaphysical sense,” remarked the muscled alicorn.
“That’s horrible,” muttered the undead Twilight.
The spell shook her head. “It is not as bad as it may seem. I can still enjoy the pleasures of the flesh. Though for reasons which should be obvious I cannot get pregnant. I am also immortal, incredibly powerful and I can freely alter my being if I desire.”
“But do you have free will?” questioned the demonic Twilight.
“Celestia told me that I didn't, though I was hoping to get a second opinion,” stated the spell, who glanced at the dealer.
Jest smiled. “And if you win, I will gladly give you such information.”
“I suppose I’m next,” offered the other alicorn. “Like I mentioned earlier, my friends and I are adventurers. The six of us became slightly isolated, considering we were constantly traveling and fighting various monsters. As such we sort of fell into relationships with one another. The last adventure saw us nearly losing to an incredibly powerful minotaur chieftain, and we only just barely survived because the nightmare within me saved us.”
“Strange, I had always assumed that an alicorn’s darker half only emerged after the pony experienced an extended period plagued by negative emotions,” the undead Twilight remarked.
“In my reality each alicorn has a second mind of sorts, which lies dormant until some event causes it to emerge,” explained the muscled alicorn. “Celestia attempted to remove my darker half after she ascended me, and only managed to make it revert to a more childlike state.”
“Fascinating,” whispered the demonic Twilight.
“Though I have questions of my own, perhaps we should continue,” pressed the alien Twilight.
The great lizard nodded. “I was perhaps most like the last Twilight before I was dropped into a different dimension by some unseen force. Before that point I had defeated Nightmare Moon along with my friends using the elements of harmony much like how the other alicorns both did by the sounds of it.”
Said alicorns nodded.
“Yes well, after that things were going well until I unexpectedly found myself in the body you see before you,” explained the lizard, who swept a hand down towards itself. “Which is apparently called a deathclaw. After that I was found by my companion Janey and we have since set out into the wasteland in search of my friends.”
“Wasteland?” questioned the alien Twilight.
“Yes apparently the mirror world, which some of you may know about, has a dark reflection of its own where the humans nearly wiped themselves out using nuclear weapons,” the great lizard answered.
Several Twilight’s nodded knowingly, while the rest merely blinked in confusion.
“These nuclear weapons you spoke of, how do they function?” pressed the alien Twilight.
“I don't know,” admitted the lizard.
“And it wouldn't matter if you did as none of you will remember what happens here,” added Jest pointedly.
The yellow eyed Twilight sighed, and leaned back in her chair. “It was worth a shot.”
“Unlike the rest of you, my name is Kanathara, and I am a keeper of secrets. Though at one point I was a unicorn like you all I was abducted by Tirek at a young age, and have since become a demon,” remarked the demonic mare. “Before you ask, yes I have met a few of these friends I think we have in common, and no I am not evil.”
“You sure appear evil,” remarked the buff Twilight. “In fact I think I defeated one of your kind a decade ago in the badlands. She was trying to resurrect some dead god to bring about the end times, though her plan was rather convoluted.”
“Aren't they all?” deadpanned the spell.
“Yes well, appearances aside I don't desire the death of the world or anything of the sort,” explained the demon. “In fact if I was not contracted to acquire the elements of harmony I’d likely spend the next century studying in relative isolation.”
“Now that sounds nice…” murmured the undead Twilight, who rubbed her chin. “Maybe after my friends pass on I’ll take a century off from public life.”
“As much as I’d like to hear your exhaustive reading lists you all have prepared, I must insist that we keep things going,” Jest interrupted, the pony glancing expectantly at the final Twilight at the table.
Who snorted. “I’m Twilight and like a few of you I was taken on as Celestia’s protege. In my world she is kind to a fault, and though I was infected by some form of alien parasite at a young age, she took me in. Since then I’ve trained nearly every day in order to defeat Nightmare Moon, something I turned out to be ill prepared to do.”
“She didn't really bring about eternal night did she?” the more muscled Twilight inquired. “In my world Luna claimed the whole night forever thing was a metaphor for people appreciating it more than the day.”
The infested mare snorted bitterly. “It hasn't been long, but since her return she has not allowed the sun to rise for even a moment. I’m starting to believe that she's trying to freeze the entire planet out of spite.”
“That seems slightly… unwarranted,” undead Twilight remarked.
Kanathara raised an eyebrow. “Are you sure she's not a prime evil? My nightmare Moon is likely a demon borne from the first act of planetary genocide, which fits the bill of yours quite nicely.”
The infested hummed thoughtfully and rubbed her chin. “That is a possibility, though to be honest I’m not wholly certain that demons are even a thing in my reality. Sure they are referenced in literature and stuff, but I’m fairly certain they are fictitious.”
“See? They are two very different things that are totally not the creator being lazy,” Jest proclaimed, riffle shuffling the cards in a dramatic fashion.
“The creator? You’re not religious are you?” questioned the spell.
“Not exactly,” Jest replied mysteriously or hamfistedly, depending on your perspective.
“Before we start, I presume that time doesn't flow normally here and that I won't come back five years later or something, right?” prodded the buff Twilight curiously.
“You will return to the exact moment I plucked you from your story and no one will be the wiser. Trust me,” Jest proclaimed, flashing the table a knowing wink.
“Right then. As curious as I am about you guys I would rather like my answer sooner rather than later,” infested Twilight proclaimed.
“Quite,” agreed the lizard.
“So, let us begin,” Jest proclaimed, the pony dealing the first hand in mere moments, his movements precise and lightning fast. “The game is Texas hold 'em, which I assume everyone knows how to play, yes?”
The assembled Twilights all nodded.
“Excellent, you will each find a set of chips with numbers on them before you, and the starting bet is one hundred points,” Jest finished. “Now then, Kanathara, you will be starting us off, and no I’m not just starting with you because everyone else answers to Twilight.”
“Uh alright, I’m in,” declared the demon, who tossed a hundred point chip into the middle.
And with that, the game had begun.
“Just call it or don't, but either way make up your mind already,” implored the infested Twilight.
The spell Twilight leaned forward. “I for one believe she is bluffing.”
The more well muscled Twilight grit her teeth and stared at the only other opponent left in this hand. Who sat behind a small mountain of chips, her cards laid against the table and a smile on her demonic face. Though no one was out yet several hours had passed and the more athletic Twilight was down to her final points.
In her hand she had a pair of threes, and combined with the pair of aces on the table it meant that she had at least something, though it wasn't much. Certainly not enough to bet what little she had left, though at this point if she didn't win something here she was going to end up out the next hand. Add to that the fact that their demonic counterpart seemed to bluff near constantly, plus was an absolute master at it and the more athletic Twilight found herself leaning on going in.
“I’m all in,” she declared, flicking her final chip into the middle.
Jest nodded knowingly. “Alright ladies, lets see what you got.”
“Two pair,” declared the first Twilight, who flipped her hand.
The demonic Twilight chuckled. “Not a bad hand but it's got nothing on my full house.”
Sure enough, when she flipped her cards over, the demon had exactly that, trouncing the other Twilight’s hand quite well… handedly.
“Dammit,” cursed the alicorn. “I don't suppose I can mulligan that hand eh?”
Jest shook their head. “I’m afraid not. It looks like this is where you get off.”
The pony sighed. “Well it was nice meeting you all.”
“It was nice meeting you as well,” offered the lizard, a sentiment which the rest of the Twilight’s shared immediately after, all save for one.
“Don't let the metaphysical door hit you on the way out,” teased the demon.
“Yeah whatever. I hope you choke on it,” spat the athletic Twilight.
“Before you go, what were you going to ask?” inquired the undead Twilight.
“I was going to ask if my story was ever going to get updated again,” replied the other Twilight who glanced expectantly at Jest.
Who chuckled, and tapped the table, causing a button to merge from the wood. “Totally!”
“Wait, really?” she questioned.
“Pfft no, this is all you’re ever going to get,” retorted Jest who slammed their hoof on the bottom, causing the floor to fall out from beneath the alicorn Twilight.
“I just wanted to be relevant again!” She cried while plunging into the darkness.
A second later and the hole vanished having been obscured by two pieces of wood which swiftly covered it and Jest’s button vanishing along with it.
“Alright then, with that done let's start the next hand,” Jest happily proclaimed.
“Oof, that was kinda dark don't you think?” pressed the undead who glanced at the spot their counterpart had been sitting a second earlier.
“Who cares?” remarked the demonic Twilight flippantly.
The other Twilight’s exchanged a knowing look with one another, a silent pact being formed between them as cards flicked across the table.
“Alright then, the buy in has been doubled, and with that let us start with Kanathara once more,” Jest offered, gesturing to the demon, who tossed the necessary chips into the middle.
“Lets see where this goes,” she remarked offhandedly, leaning back in her chair. “Say, I don't suppose you have a kitchen back there by chance do you?”
Jest chuckled. “Don't need one, here. Take a look at the menu and lemme know if you need anything. Something tells me we’ll be here a while.”
The strange pony clapped their hooves together and a set of menus appeared before the gathered Twilight’s.
“Finally, now things can really get going,” remarked the infested hungrily.
“This is ridiculous,” stated Kanathara bitterly, the demon leaning forward in her chair, her whiskey sour nearly toppling over onto the table. “How did things end up this way?”
The lizard shrugged. “I don't know how but at least it's over. It feels like we’ve been here for days.”
“Three days to be exact, but don't worry I got rid of the need to use the bathroom or sleep after it became apparent that this was going to take a while,” Jest replied.
“No wonder I haven't had to use the little girl’s room after I drank all those dacquires,” muttered the undead.
“Well, everything else aside it was rather nice to enjoy a caesar salad done exactly as I like it, among pleasant company” remarked the dead eyed Twilight, who tapped her lips with a napkin. “Noone seems to get the intricacies of making a good salad these days.”
“I’m glad you liked it,” replied Jest with a smile.
“Curiosity over this whole pocket reality aside, I’m more than a little baffled how things ended up like they did,” remarked the infested, who gestured to the table, wherein a great mountain of chips sat at the center. “How did this even happen exactly?”
“You girls were so bent on getting Kanathara out of the game that things got a little out of hand,” Jest replied, chuckling to themself. “Or should I say in hand?”
The deathclaw snorted. “At least it's over after this. I think my tail is about to fall asleep again.”
“Yes well, I suppose I’m glad that it will be finally done with,” agreed the undead.
“We are ready when you are, Jest,” declared the spell.
“Alright, let's make this as dramatic as possible, on three I want you all to flip your cards,” Jest offered, glancing around the room.
“Sounds fair,”
“Fine by me,”
“Acceptable,”
“If I have to,”
“We might as well,”
“Excellent, now before we get into the end game I would just like to say how much I appreciated your cooperation here. The porn Twilight’s were much more difficult,” Jest proclaimed, the pony shuddering briefly.
“Wait, porn Twilight’s what are you-”
Jest cleared their throat. “But enough about that. Three, two, one, and flip em!”
“Huh, I won,” muttered the magical construct, every Twilight looking down to find that she had indeed accomplished such a thing, with only a three of a kind at that. “I assumed you girls had better.”
The deathclaw growled. “I knew this was a bad idea. Why did I think a single ace was going to save me?”
“I don't know, but either way I’m glad I at least got a single pair,” remarked the infested.
The undead Twilight shrugged. “I may have only had one pair as well but I never really cared about winning anyway.”
“Well I sure planned on it,” muttered Kanathara bitterly.
“Oh don't be so mad, at least now you all get to go back to your own worlds,” Jest offered. “Oh and if you ever find yourself back here you’ll have the memories of this place restored.”
“Well it was nice knowing you all,” offered the undead.
“Likewise,” remarked the lizard.
“Too bad, I would have liked to know if we were going to be able to save the world,” stated the infested mare.
“And I would have liked to know how to defeat that wretched hag,” muttered the demon.
“Yes well, better luck next time,” Jest exclaimed before slamming a hoof against a button and causing all but one Twilight to vanish into the floor.
Once gone, the earth pony hopped off his chair, and clopped his hoof twice against the stage, making the table, and the last chair to slip beneath the ground. A second tap of Jest’s hoof later and a set of lights settled on them, a microphone popping into the strange pony’s grip.
“Alright then, this is it ladies and gentlemen. Twilight has won, and now it's time to get an answer to a burning question,” Jest began. “A question which has remained at the back of your mind likely since you first discovered what you really are. Go ahead Twilight, fire away as they say.”
The spell nodded slowly. “Do I have free will?”
“No,” Jest replied simply, only to chuckle. “Well the actual answer is a little more complicated than that but that's pretty much the jist of it.”
“How so?” pressed the spell.
“Free will as we commonly see it is restrained by upbringing, personality, biological functions, and our environment,” Jest began, conjuring a blackboard out of the ground and tapping a hoof against it. “In your case you essentially took the exact same path you would have if you were a quote unquote real pony.”
Twilight trotted over to the board, her spotlight following her as she inspected the primitive chalk drawings that showed major points in her life. “I’m not sure I follow,” she muttered. “If I did exactly as a real Twilight would have done then doesn't that prove that I don't have free will.”
“Exactly, and neither would she,” Jest explained. “Her life went almost exactly the same way yours has. Societal pressures, your parents, everything that made her her, made you, you. If all of those outside forces were exactly the same and you lived your life a hundred times you would have made the same choices a hundred times over.”
“I think I understand where you are going, but the fact that they are a thinking being means that we both could do something different,” Twilight replied.
“But would they?” Jest countered. “Technically you can jump up and down while screaming the ABCs backwards but are you going to do that? I mean sure there might be some reality out there where you are doing that but that's just not something you would ever think of doing unless I had mentioned it.”
“I’ve read something akin to this argument before and though compelling I feel as though the fact that you still can do anything means you do have free will,” Twilight retorted.
“Then you define free will in a different manner then I, and if that's how you define it then you essentially do have free will now,” Jest continued with a shrug. “Though I can assure you this conversation was only ever going to go one way.”
Twilight hummed thoughtfully. “Is that true?”
“Absolutely,” Jest declared.
Twilight nodded. “Then I suppose we are done here.”
“Then I suppose we are, and best of luck Twilight,” Jest offered, the pony giving her a wide smile.
“Thank you. Though I wont remember this conversation I hope that this feeling of contentment stays with me for at least a little longer,” Twilight stated, smiling faintly.
“Don't worry, it will,” Jest remarked, flashing the pony a wink.
Author's Note
Queen Of The Wasteland . The Grand Marionette(you are here). Born In Light. The First Law of Magic. The Infestation of Equiss Prime all received similiar updates, though the ending is changed depending on which fic you are reading so if you think you are suffering from deja vu then just scroll down or press ctrl+f and search "Three, two, one, and flip em" to get to the new content!
Thanks again for all your support and I hope you enjoy this not very spooky but still special update.
