The Redshirts Defend Canterlot

by TDASA

Rating: everyone
Tags: Science Fiction, Random, Crossover, Human, Roseluck, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Star Trek, Comedy, Other
Length: 1194

The Changeling Swarm could never be prepared for the Redshirt Horde!

The Enterprise has swooped in for the rescue as they aid their allies in Equestria against the dreaded alien bug-horses. However, they make the lethal mistake of sending in their security forces before their ranking officers...

Oh well, it could be worse. They could've sent in a legion of Stormtroopers...

*Second story I've ever made got featured Whoop! Whoop!*

Published 2018-10-15 18:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2018-10-15 18:20:01 UTC

The Redshirts Defend Canterlot

Roseluck looked out on the city of Canterlot in despair as hundreds of changelings tore through the walls, and then through the Royal Guards. She gasped in horror as the bugs started to secrete a green sticky goo that covered Equestria's Finest from head to hoof. The guards struggled as the changelings started to go after civilians, tying them up and putting them in cocoons as well.

Oh where had it all gone wrong? Was it in the ignorance of the heroes of Equestria to Twilight Sparkle's suspicions? The lack of communication between the Princesses hindering the detection of the masquerading Princess Cadance? The utter absence of the Lunar Princess? Or maybe it was some innate aspect of the average pony? A natural default to helplessness? An utter lack of weapons or even technological advancement prehaps?

No... it was because the Royal Guards were about as useful as sandpaper underpants.

Rose needed to run, now. She galloped through the streets as explosions from the changeling's magic burst from nearby buildings, showering the streets with dust and debris. With a mixture of luck and skill, the pony managed to jump over the smouldering carnage, ducking under flying debris and screaming guards. With a hop, skip, and a jump, Roseluck hid herself inside a rubbish can, peering fearfully out and beholding the destruction before her.

Nothing could've prepared her for what came next.

In a flash of yellow light that looked strangely like glitter being stirred in water, hundreds of bipedal creatures appeared around the city. They wore magnificent red shirts, with a strange triangular insignia on the left breast. In their hands they held a strange device, a black box with a handle seemingly made for their furless minotaur-like claws that ended in a silver cylinder with a short antennae sticking out. The changelings hovered in stunned silence for a few seconds, before screeching and dive-bombing the anomalous humans.

The redshirts retaliated by pointing their weapons in an awkward and dramatic way at their enemies. At the last moment, they squeezed the triggers of their weapons and red, sparkly beams shot out from their phasers in a strangely slow and below-lightspeed manner. The changelings took a bad hit, many of the bugs were vaporized and many more were injured. The enemy attacked the redshirts, many taking direct hits. Roseluck watched in confusion as one of the humans took a glancing blow to his leg with a inconsequentially small piece of pavement. He screamed in pain, clutching his chest (for reasons Rose couldn't fathom) before dropping onto his knees and rolling over dead.

In the battle, many of the redshirts wrestled ineffectively with their changeling adversaries. Some tripped and fell flat on their faces, never getting up again. Even more were flung into nearby crates. Every single one them seemed to have rolled over and died in the most dramatic way possible. Even when blasts were nowhere near them, they still flung themselves to the streets and died. When the smoke cleared, there were no redshirts left to speak of. The changelings grinned to themselves, and Rose gasped in despair.

Then, five more columns of light appeared, similar in glitter appearance to the ones that had flashed before the redshirts had tried to save the day. Out of them appeared five more bipeds. Unlike their predecessors, these ones had different coloured uniforms from the first. Two wore yellow shirts with the same triangle insignia. One stood up front of the line made from the other four, Rose could only assume he was the leader. The other was probably the shortest of the rest, couldn't have been much more than a teenager. Two others wore blue uniforms, both standing side by side. One had a strange box and also possessed the most curious pointy elven ears on the sides of his head (instead of on top, as any intelligent creature with pointy ears should have, therefore Roseluck assumed this one was the least intelligent of the group). The second had nothing much remarkable other than a mole on his cheek. The last one wore a red shirt, therefore, Rose's hope for him was not high.

The leader shouted something patriotic, ripping his uniform as he did so. He then threw his phaser aside and charged the changelings with nothing but his bare fists. The enemy was taken by surprise and the head changeling took one of Kirk's fists of fury to his noggin, sending the changeling sprawling backwards into the swarm. The enemy fired and Rose held her breath, shutting her eyes. She opened them, however, when she heard the sound of continued phaser fire. She was dumbfounded to find that each and every shot from the changeling line had missed the five mysterious officers. The unintelligent blue one touched every changeling's neck, killing very effectively (of course, Roseluck had thought, the stupid one brute forces his way through the enemy). Before long, the five heroes stood triumphantly over a pile of smoking, groaning changelings as the sun rose behind them.

Captain Kirk wiped a small trail of blood from his lips before striding into the wedding chapel confidently.
"I don't know how you managed to defeat my changelings, alien!" Queen Chrysalis spat at the captain, "But all I know is that, no matter what dark magicks you may posses! You shall never defeat me!"

Captain Kirk brushed his handsome hairstyle back, before grinning romantically at the Queen of the Changelings.
"I don't... need to... defeat... you, honey," he said suavely.

Later that day...

The beat rocked through the wedding reception as Roseluck watched with curiosity as Captain Kirk and his crew jammed it out at the front of the party. Queen Chrysalis sat at a table at the side of the stage, thoroughly reformed and smitten with Captain Kirk. The real Princess Cadance and Prince Shining Armour danced it out as well, eternally thankful to the crew of the Enterprise for their aid against the changeling horde.

Roseluck's eyes wandered to the bride's gorgeous gown and Shining Armour's flowing royal uniform. Rose's eyes widened as an aspect of the Prince's wardrobe struck her. She bit her lip in fear as she looked at the shirt Shining Armour was wearing.

It was red.

She dived out of the crowd, determined to save the Prince from whatever disaster was about to bring about his doom. Just before she reached him however, she kicked up a stray pebble which smacked a table leg which shook a wine bottle which shot it's cork out and beaned Shining Armour right in the back of his head. Everypony and every human in the crowd gasped as Shining Armour collapsed right on the dance floor. One of the blue shirted humans (the smart one, not the one with the pointy ears) ran over to Shining's side, pulling out a scanner and preforming a diagnosis.

The Captain ran over to the doctor's side and McCoy looked at him with despair in his eyes.

"He's dead, Jim."

Author's Note

I was thinking of making a sequel to this...

Something along the lines of: "The Stormtroopers Face Down Sombra"