A Wacky Read

The Castle Ruins were interesting, but fruitless. Rarity assured everyone, that there cannot be a hidden Stargate in the halls, even though it was rigged with countless hidden entrances and rooms.

They took a few minutes to search it anyway and followed Rarity's spell through the dusty halls.
Robbed of their hopes, the Humans went back to the bridge.

"We can look another place!", Twilight assured them.

"Where?", Cam asked. "You said, if anywhere, it would be here.

Hati went past them, followed by Rook and Morty. "Well, I know I'll check out that cave anyway." He waved the Humans without turning around. "You're invited to join."

The undead boy Knom was already waiting for them by the stairs, that lead into the gorge.

Morty himself was excited to see such an artefact. Beholding the white, glowing Tree of Harmony, he was silenced by awe.

"Something about this looks weirdly familiar", Hati thought by himself while mumbling with his finger on his chin. "Or is that just me?"

Rook beside him knew what he meant but was trapped in his mind, as usual. "You mean because the branches bear the signs that the Pony-folks got on their butts? Nah, it's probably something else. I wonder what the backside of it looks like."

"No, you're right. That is curious."

Morty turned around to face the purple Princess of puny Pony people that came down the staggering stone stairs followed by her friends and the suspicious Humans.

"What is the meaning of this?", he barked at her while his flames sparked for the moment.

"The Tree of Harmony?", she smiled nervously, "It's protecting Equestria from Chaos, Discord and the forces of evil."

"Why does it have the images of your butts?"

"The ... our Cutie Marks?"

"Whatever you call them. More secrets of your kind. You're trying to fool us once again, Princess?"

"What?! NO! We are the wielders of the Elements of Harmony. Every single one of my friends and I represent one element. Applejack stands for Honesty."

"That's right."

"That's why her Cutie Mark is on the branch of Honesty." They were listening to the Princess. "Generosity, Loyalty, Kindness, Laughter, they are all there. And mine, Magic, is in the center."

Hati was counting them elements on his fingers but soon ran out of fingers. "Hold on! You're telling me, this is a magic artefact, and you're the warden of it?"

Twilight's eyes were jumping, "I guess you could say that. Yes."

Morty was walking up to her, "Honesty, Loyalty, Generosity, Kindness, Laughter and Magic? Those are your elements?"

"The Elements of Harmony."

"The Harmony is like a huge part of it", Rainbow boldly added.

"You're the chosen ones?"

"Yeah!", Rainbow flew down to the skeleton to face it head on. "Got a problem with that?"

"More magic, more secrets", Morty calmly said in a cynical tone. "Does your treachery never end?"

"Now hold on there a second", Applejack yelled, "We never told any lies to y'all."

"I didn't mention it", Twilight explained, "Because I didn't think it was important. The Elements can't help us helping you. They only restore Harmony. They are not making portals through time and space."

“But you did use them to bring us here!”, Morty yelled. “Your little accident wasn’t that much of an accident after all, was it?”

Cam had something to say and everyone was turning to look at him. The Humans were standing by the stairs and showed little interest in the Tree or the Magic of Ponykind.

"That is all nice an'all, but seriously, what are we goin' to do now? You're out of options, Princess?"

"I", she hesitated, "I'm not sure. We can look for the Gate in other places."

"Enough promises", Teal'C loudly said.

"Yeah", Cam agreed, "He's right. Enough of that bullshit, alright, Princess? We've been here for two days now and you have clearly no clue what you're doing."

"All I'm doing is trying to help you."

"No, you're just tryin' to get rid of us."

"Yeah!", Rodney yelled, "Wait, what? Really?"

"Yeah. Did she try to find another way? No. Did she fix the Mirror? Also no."

"That is not fair! The Mirror wasn't meant to work that way. I couldn't have known what would happen!"

"This", Cam was pointing his hand at the gorge and the tree, "All this magic, that is the cause we're here. Forget the Gate. We need a time machine, alright?"

He turned to Rodney, "You think you can do something to the Mirror to bring us anywhere else but here?"

"I can try."

"Mitchell!", Daniel stood up to him.

"Jackson?"

"Don't you think this goes too far?"

"It ain't goin' far enough, is what it does."

Cam went on and up the stairs, when Daniel yelled after him. "We need to respect their ways!"

"Then do that, Doctor Jackson, you do that. I'm planning on taking matters into our hands now."

Vala shrugged when Daniel looked at her. She went after Cam and so did Teal'C, Rodney without a word as well and at last even Daniel.

When the gorge was silent and everyone left was looking after the Humans, Hati casually pointed his index at Cam and nodded, "I like him."

"Quite the temper."

"Said the flaming skeleton with anger issues."

"Yes, I guess. What do you think, boy?"

"He's right, y'know."

Twilight's shocked look went for the green Lizard, "Not you too."

"I'm sure Rex already found a solution. We'll get back to Xerexarea, even if it destroys the Mirror."

Rarity was shocked too, "You can't be serious."

"No", Rook added, "He's Hati. I'm Rook. Hi."

"And farewell", Hati grumpily said and went to the stairs.

"Wait!", Twilight yelled. "Please! We can help you!"

Hati stopped on the steps while his pals were bypassing him. His furious gaze went down to the Princess. "You had this!", he presented the Tree, "The whole time. You have super powers, magic to fix everything, to restore Harmony. And you didn't even try to use them. Who says that bringing us back is not an act of Harmony? You had the power all this time, you have options. But you let us wait and rot here. This is an alien planet, who knows what it will do to us! You got any idea how dangerous this is? No. No, you don't."
He shook his head and went up the steps. Together the aliens disappeared in the woods.

The Ponies were alone in the gorge. "What a bunch of bozos."

"No", Twilight rejected Rainbow's comment, "They are right."

She went to the tree and her horn started to glow.

"What are you doin', Sugarcube?"

Framed by the pink glow, the gemstones separated from the white tree and came down to her.
She turned to her friends. "We need to use the Elements of Harmony."

"But what for, Darling?"

"We have to try, don't we? I can't give them up if there's still an option. But I can't do it alone."

Applejack and Rarity came closer to her and smiled, "Of course we help you."

"Can't let you mess this up all by yourself, can we now?"

"Yak", Rainbow above them stretched her tongue, "Let's go then, before I change my mind about this."

And so the Ponies hurried through the forest back to the crystal castle.

The gates of the library were busted open by the boot of the fearless Human Mitchell. "Rodney get to work. Teal'C cover the door. Vala, to the other side." He tossed her one of his pistols and everyone got into position.

"What's going on?", Sam asked.

And even Jack was excited, "Wow-wow, what?! What are you doing?"

"Sir, these Ponies are not playing fair. Like my granny said, Never trust a horse wearin' makeup."

Daniel shook his head, "Your granny is nuts."

"She might have been, but in this case, she was right."

"Someone cares to explain?", Jack asked.

Daniel walked up to him, "Cam thinks the Ponies are hiding something from us."

"Well, duh."

"You think?"

"Of course. Is there anyone not hiding anything?"

"Fair point."

"What are they doing now?"

"Cam wants Rodney to make the Mirror work, anyplace. Just out of here."

"Well, that sounds like a plan."

"Really? You too?"

"Why not? Someplace might be better than here, right? We might find someone who is actually competent enough to help."

Rodney took Sam's PC and checked a few things. He changed the spots of the connectors a bit and went for different crystals on the frame. At once he started to hack down into the screen and the Mirror actually changed colours.

"I did it!", he happily claimed.

"No, you didn't", Sam corrected, "A Unicorn came by earlier and activated the Mirror."

"Well, that's great! Now all we need to do is find the right channel."

"Channel?"

"Metaphor. Come on, Sam." Together they changed the settings on the screen and with it the colours of the Mirror. They flipped the channels and worlds on the other side over and over again. Most of them looked inhabited and not able to sustain life.

"Incoming!", Cam yelled. "It's just the Lizards."

Krator stood behind him, taller and wider than Teal'C. "Let them in, if you know, what's good for you."

"I was goin' to anyway."

When Hati, Rook, Morty and Knom entered, Krator intercepted them at once. "I have to tell you something."

"What? What is it?" They were moving away from the Human ears and Krator was making sure, Rex wasn't around either.

"Rex is planning something. I don't know what but he's taking reckless action. We need to be aware and cautious."

"Yes, yes indeed, you need to be", Rex's deep, smooth voice caught their attention, "But not because of me."

Morty asked, "And what does that mean?"

Rex strode around them, more smiling than usual. They caught him in a good mood, so it seemed. "I have a solution."

"I knew he would get it", Hati happily stated.

"Why, yes. But the Humans and these Ponies might not like it. They will certainly try to stop us."

"Now, why would they do that?", Morty pried.

"Oh, I don't know", Elisa commented boldly, "Maybe because he's gonna destroy shit like he always does?"

"Why, a bit of damage is the usual result of hard work. The Ponies do not understand that."

"You're sayin', you can get us home?", Hati asked him, "But to what price?"

"Never mind that, dear."

"You will destroy the Mirror, won't you?"

"The Mirror? Why, no, not at all. In fact, we don't need that old thing anymore. Let the Humans have it. We will need something else though."

Finally the Pony Princess arrived in the hallway and Cam yelled, "Contact! Stay where you are or I will open fire."

For a second, Twilight stopped, but then went on determinedly.

The loud, metallic bang echoed through the plain crystal walls. The copper shell was tossed from the mechanism and fell with a chink to the stone floor.
The bullet jumped around the hallway. It hit the floor in front of the Princess's hooves and ricocheted off into the distance.

"I'm warning you!", Cam yelled. "Not one more step!"

Shocked the Ponies stopped in the hallway. Only Applejack and Rainbow went on to stand by Twilight's side. "Now listen 'ere!", Jack yelled. "This 'ere is Twilight's home, her castle. You can't just make threats like that and use that ... that thing!"

"HEY!", a piercing voice behind Mitchell almost robbed him from his hearing. When he checked, it was the Pink Pony and it looked fairly mad. Behind her stood the yellow one with a similar expression. "Did you just shoot at our friends?! Fluttershy?!"

"Yes?"

"Tell me he didn't just shoot at our friends."

"I ... but ...what?"

"Get down for the thundaa!", Pinkie yelled and charged the Human. Hindhooves first she jumped him, buried her legs in his stomach and tossed his paralysed body out into the hallway. His black, boxy gun flew off and slid spinning over the smooth floor.

Coughing Cam stayed down and before the other Humans were able to rush for help, the rest of the herd was standing in the door.

"Hey, gurls!", Pinkie said with a smile, as if nothing just happened. "How did it go?"

"Not well", Twilight told her with a face and tone as pissed as a Princess of Friendship should never become.

Rodney and Sam raised their hands and stood up from the Mirror, slowly backing up into Teal'C's direction. He had his Staff-Weapon raised and aimed at the Princess.

"More weapons?", Twilight grunted through her teeth just before her pink magic ripped the staff of the Jaffa's hands. It flew off into the dark library space and left the Humans unarmed.

Vala laid her pistol on the ground and raised her hands as well.
"No need to be rude, right?", she smiled nervously. "We're all friends here anyway, right?"

"Friends?" Twilights gaze became fiery, "You're no friends of mine."

Rex couldn't be more happy about the situation. And with the sentence, "Now, this is our queue to leave", he aimed the Inaji-Book at the next wall and jumped through the portal that appeared there. His friends and servants followed him without hesitation. And before the Ponies noticed they were leaving, the portal was closed behind them.

Jack near the side chamber of the library was sitting casually next to the herd. When they spotted him he raised his hands and shrugged. "I'm just an old man. Don't make me stand up, please."

Daniel put himself into the line, between his group and the horns of the Unicorns. "That was dumb. We're sorry. We shouldn't have tried to take the Mirror. And he shouldn't have shot at you."

From the hallway they heard a thin voice, "That was really stupid!"

"You can lock us up", Daniel continued, "But it was your Mirror, your magic that brought us here. This is your mess. We were just trying to fix it. Our behavior can not be excused, but we did what we thought was right."

Twilight took a moment to think, her friends where waiting for her judgement.

"So do I", she said and her pink magic tossed a ray at the Humans before her. The glow framed them and they stopped moving all together. Frozen in stasis they would remain this way until Twilight had found a solution.

Only Jack remained on his spot. "You didn't kill them, right?"

He was met by the fiery gaze of the Alicorn. She walked up to him and yelled, "What is wrong with you Humans?!"

"I'm asking that myself every day. Seriously."

After she caught her breath she explained, "They will remain frozen until I know how to get rid of you."

"Isn't that a nice thing to say?"

"And you! You can guard them, if you want. But don't do anything funny."

"I'm never funny. Almost never. Hardly. Sometimes."

"But Twilight", Applejack brought her back to Equestria, "How do you want to bring them back home now?"

"I don't." She went to the Mirror and tossed her Magic at it. "We'll just find a place they can survive in and then just send them off. Bye-bye Humans." The channels of the Mirror changed just like before.

"I see the Mirror is working. But where's Starswirl? He ought to be here by now."

"Oh", Fluttershy squeaked, "He was here, yes. He made the Mirror work and then he went to talk to the blue Lizard."

"To Rex?" She turned to look around. "Where by Celestia are the Lizards now?!"