Redheart closed the door to her home and started slouching along the street. She had woken up ten minutes ago and, following her morning routine, was now heading to Sugarcube Corner to get her first coffee of the day. Pushing the door open, she was greeted by Pinkie Pie, as cheerful as ever despite the early hour.

"Hi Redheart! The usual?"

"Yes. Plus a couple of donuts, please," said Redheart, eyeing the pastries on display.

"Oh, you have time for donuts today?" asked Pinkie.

Redheart nodded while stifling a yawn. "Yes, it's my day off. I'm going to sit over there, near the window."

"Okie dokie! Do you want to take the donuts now or should I bring them with your coffee?"

"With the coffee, thanks Pinkie," Redheart said as she walked to one of the table.

As she waited, she looked at the ponies setting up their stalls for the market. She thought about doing some shopping after her breakfast; she could use some fresh vegetables to stuff her fridge. She couldn't remember exactly what she had to buy, though. She needed her coffee to get her brain rolling. Thankfully Pinkie was soon here to deliver.

"Thanks, Pinkie."

"You're welcome!"

Redheart smiled at her, then grabbed a donut and bit into it before looking back outside. She didn't heard the clip clop of departing hooves, so she turned her head to Pinkie who was still standing there, smiling. Redheart slowly munched, looking the pink mare up and down. She took a sip of her coffee to gulp down her donut, then cleared her throat. "Can I help you?"

"Yes! You see I was wondering if I could ask you a question. I know it's your day off so it's OK if you don't want to."

Despite not being as bad as Anon, Pinkie could sometime ask some worrying things. Redheart didn't really want to deal with that now. She leaned to get a look at the counter, but saw no one waiting to be served, and the streets were still mostly empty. What a bright idea to be an early bird! she thought, groaning internally. She knew the best way to get rid of Pinkie without making her sad was to simply answer the question. With a soft sigh, Redheart gestured toward the seat in front of her. "Alright, sit down and tell me."

Pinkie's smile widen and she promptly plopped down. "Thanks! It's just a small question, don't worry. Can I cheer up ponies with sex?"

Redheart looked at her blankly. Without breaking eye contact, she lifted her coffee cup and slowly drank while Pinkie waited with a smile. "I'm not sure what you mean, Pinkie. Can you tell me exactly what you intend to do?" Please don't say 'sex parties', thought Redheart.

The pink pony looked around; the place was still empty for now. "OK, I can tell you! Yesterday I was with my friends for a picnic and Applejack told us Sugar Belle had break up with Big Mac! This is so sad. You know, Big Mac was really in love! Applejack said he's all so mopey and sad he can't even work anymore, and then Rainbow said -" With a brush of her hoof, Pinkie arranged her mane to look like Rainbow's and reclined in her seat with a smug grin. " -’Eh, nothin' a good rut won't fix!’" Her imitation of Rainbow's voice was so impressive Redheart had to double check to make sure the pegasus wasn't around. Pinkie returned to her usual self and went on. "It was a bit insensitive of Rainbow to say that but I was thinking: 'Maybe she's right? Maybe that would help Big Mac forget about Sugar Belle and cheer him up!' So do you think I should try? Maybe if it works I could do it for other ponies too!"

"Sorry Pinkie, but I don't think I'm the pony to ask that," said Redheart with a shake of her head.

"Oh, why not? Aren't you the sex expert?" Seeing Redheart frowning, she added: "Sorry! I mean: the sex medical expert?"

That was hardly better, but Redheart decided to brush it off. "Well yes, I am, but what you're asking is related more to sociology than actual sexology. I can give you advice for the act itself, not for the reasons leading you to said act. If you want my personal opinion though, I would advise you to first talk to Big Mac and let him tell you what you can do for him."

"Ooh, that's actually a good advice, thanks!"

"You're welcome, Pinkie," Redheart said, nodding. "Other questions?"

"Yes, what are 'sex parties'?"

Redheart trotted out of Sugarcube Corner a hour later. Now that she had downed her third cup of coffee, she was ready to face the bustling market. She took her time to wander the alleys, stuffing her bags with vegetables as she went from stall to stall. She talked a bit with some ponies, sat five minutes on a bench to rest her hooves, stopped by a clothing stall to eye the scarves on display... everything she usually didn't have time for. She was almost done with her errands when she noticed, a few meters away, the unique silhouette of Anon. The human was walking in her direction, a bag full of groceries in each hand.

"Hello Anon!" she said as she trotted up to him. "It's been a while. The last time I saw you was at my office two weeks ago! How are you doing?"

"Oh. Hi, Redheart," said Anon, giving a hint of a smile at her. "I'm fine, thanks."

"You sure? You don't sound like it," said Redheart, frowning slightly.

Anon's smile faltered, and he bowed his head, dejected. "Ugh, sorry, Red. I'm not in a bright mood, I have to admit. Twilight ditched me."

"Oh," was all Redheart could answer on the spot. There was a bit of an awkward pause as she rubbed her leg, trying to form a proper response. "Uh, well, hm..."

"Don't worry, it'll be alright. I just need time," he said as he resumed his walk.

"No, Anon, wait!" Redheart stopped him with a hoof to his thigh. "Uh, do you want to talk? Can I offer you a drink?" With her free hoof she pointed to a nearby café's terrace.

Anon considered the offer, then nodded. "OK. Following you."

With a smile, Redheart lead the way to the café. She would have preferred to go to Sugarcube Corner, but she couldn't risk Pinkie interrupting in the middle of the conversation. This establishment was her second go-to place for coffee anyway, it wasn't too bad. The terrace was mostly empty, they had no difficulty finding a quiet table to chat without the fear of eavesdroppers. Redheart sat in front of Anon, and instantly a waitress came to take their orders.

"Coffee please. Long black, two sugars, just a hint of milk," said Redheart.

"Same," added Anon.

The waitress nodded and scribbled the order on her notepad. "Right away!" she said as she trotted back inside.

Redheart shuffled a bit on her seat to get more comfortable, then engage in conversation. "I didn't took you for a coffee drinker, Anon."

The human, sitting cross-legged to accommodate his size to the short table, shrugged. "I used to drink a lot of coffee, back home. I’ve had much less since I started living in Ponyville."

"I simply couldn't live without it. Working in the Hospital is just too tiresome, and the schedule is flat-out fucked up. Pardon my language."

"I don't mind, Red."

"Although I have to admit, the schedule is much more bearable since I got my new position. I don't need coffee as much as before, but at this point I'm already addicted," she said with a chuckle.

"I know how it is," said Anon, "My previous job asked me to sit all day and stay focus on my task. It was easy to fall asleep, especially after noon."

"Oh I definitely see what you mean! It was the same when I was working at the reception. My thermos was my best friend back then."

"I suppose it's the same, yes."

"Here are your drinks!" shimmed the waitress as she returned with a tray loaded on her back. She made it slide smoothly on the table, not spilling a single drop despite the drinks being filled to the rim. "Enjoy your drinks, and do not hesitate to call if you need anything!"

Redheart smiled to the waitress and let her take her leave. She grabbed a spoon and swirled the liquid before approaching it to her lips. It was burning hot, so she blew on it and set it back down to wait. She realized then that Anon had been doing exactly the same with his own drink. She smiled.

"So..." Her smile faltered a bit, and she cleared her throat. "Twilight and you? It's over?"

Anon sighed. "Yeah. Last week."

Redheart waited for him to go on, but he didn't. Instead he was simply twirling his spoon in his cup. She realized she would have to prod him to get answers. "And what happened?"

He stopped toying with the spoon and set it aside. "She didn't took well to the whole 'cumming in her brain' thing," he said before taking a sip of his drink.

"Oh really? I thought she was OK with it?"

"Uh... turns out that was too much?" said Anon, rubbing his neck. "But to be honest, it's not just that. It wasn't going too well between us for some time. It was bound to happen."

"I didn't know you two had problems," said Redheart with a raised brow.

Anon shrugged. "It's not something you let others see, you know how it is."

"I suppose." She raised her now reasonably warm coffee and took a swig. She enjoyed the taste for some time before going back to talking. "Pardon my curiosity, but was your problems with Twilight related to sex?"

"Uh, yes?" he said as he shuffled his legs awkwardly. "I'm not sure if I should say it, but yeah, Twilight and I weren't always on the same wavelength about it."

"Yeaaah," she said as she rolled her eyes. "To be honest, Anon, I was wondering if Twilight was really accepting of all the stuff you told me about in my office."

"I reckon that I have some weird fetishes, but-"

"No no no, Anon," Redheart said, chuckling. "You have some downright fucked up kinks, Anon. I can assure you that you have more imagination that anypony else in this town, maybe in Equestria. Just look at that whole 'brainfucking' thing, I didn't even know it was possible!"

To Redheart's surprise, Anon started to look ashamed. He bowed his head, averting her eyes, and scratched his neck in embarrassment. The human was getting suddenly too aware of his own perversity, and realized how strange he made things for Twilight.

Redheart leaned forward to reach his hand, and gently tapped it with her hoof as she smiled softly. "H-Hey, no, I didn't meant to shame you, Anon. Quite the contrary. In fact, I'm actually... curious, I would say."

Anon had to double check to be sure he heard this right. "What, really?"

"Anon, I'll be honest with you. I wouldn't have accepted this job if I wasn't myself a bit... dirty minded." She blushed a bit at that, but quickly took a hold of herself. "I thought being a Sexologist would be fun, and I even fantasized a bit about it. The truth is that most ponies are chaste. I mean, boringly chaste. The job is much less fun that I thought."

Anon nodded in understanding. "Yeah, I figured that already. I mean, the 'ponies are chaste' part," he said, making air quotes with his fingers. "It's a shame, you guys are like premium fucking material."

"W-Well yes, but not everypony is so prudish. I know of a few ponies that have 'interesting ideas', but those are nothing compared to what you come up with." Redheart was talking with more and more enthusiasm, despite the blush that was growing on her face.

Anon laughed a bit. "You didn't look quite so happy though, that last time we saw each other."

She laughed too, rolling her eyes. "Please, Anon, I thought you wanted to kill Twilight at first! Seriously, fucking her brain. It's..." She was blushing more and more, so much that Anon could almost feel the heat radiating from her face. "OK, I actually was r-really curious about it." She cough in her hoof and grabbed her coffee to take a drink. She hesitated a few seconds before she blurted out as fast and quietly as she could: "Please don't laugh but I-tried-to-fuck-myself-in-the-ear-with-a-dildo."

Anon chuckled, brow raised. "You what?"

"You understood me!" replied Redheart with a snarl. "I tried brainfucking myself, and it worked. Almost. The fact is that I can't maintain the toy in place while I'm doing it. Once it's in, I can't even stand on my legs! This is so frustrating."

"Wow.You're serious, then?"

"Yes I am. I even... asked out an old friend to try it with me, but he refused. He called me crazy."

"His loss." said Anon, shaking his head. "Why would anyone turn down such an offer, really?"

"I know, right?" Redheart lifted a hoof to her head, scratching nonchalantly behind it. "But, well, maybe somehuman would like to take me up on the offer?"

"R-Red," stammered Anon, taken aback by the Nurse's bold proposition. "I'm just out of a major relationship, I can't go and hook up with somebody else like that. It's too soon."

Slowly, she pulled on the band who was holding her bun in place, and let her pink mane flow down around her shoulders. She raised half-lidded eyes to Anon, an murmured: "You sure?"

Almost instantly Anon sprang to his feet. "OK, show me your place."

Author's Note

I am quite nervous to post this, because I saw many people adding this story to their favorites and liking it. I fear that, this second chapter being not as funny as the first one, many might be disappointed. Hopefully it's just me being stupid.