Guided Heart

by Earth To Evie

Rating: teen
Tags: Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Silverstream, Original Character, Suicide / Self Harm
Length: 1716

A lonely heart lost within the abyss, is given a claw in friendship. To show that hope is never lost, that faith is a powerful magic.

A lonely heart lost within the abyss, is given a claw in friendship. To show that hope is never lost, that faith is a powerful magic.

A lovely thank you to Quillian Inkheart for allowing me to use his OC for this tale, I had a fun time writing this, please do check out his page.

Published 2018-10-25 21:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2018-10-25 21:10:01 UTC

Just For Now.

“Quillian?” That melodic voice spoke in a sweet tone of voice, those eyes full of such vitality and spirit locked upon my own somber gaze.

“Yes?” I spoke up from the abyss, the world a blank canvas yet to be painted.

“Why are you so distant?”

“It is better this way, a pony ashore can’t sway the one within the ocean.” The spotlight of this one stallion show burning into my white coat, my stage set for any passing soul to watch yet only silence could be heard.

“Being alone isn’t a good thing, ponies are full of…”

“Disappointment, secrets or perhaps lies?” My dark grey hues burned into the nothingness, hidden behind umbra frames that clung to my muzzle like ink.

“I was going to say surprises…”

“I’m done with such childish thoughts, they must be placed away.”

“Just open your heart, they might just…”

“Surprise me? Please just for once act like an adult!” I gritted my teeth before slamming a hoof roughly atop the wooden table I sat at.

“You don’t have to go alone.” Her voice fading off into the wind, carried away towards an unknown destination.

“It’s better this way.” The sound of galloping hooves filled the air around myself, gazing down to an empty cup of coffee in my hooves.

The abyss gone for now, my inner thoughts washing back into the ocean of my mind. That was until the tide came in again, then she and the rest of my past would come washing back. The city of Manehattan alive and never ceasing, the small cafe I sat at was a speck among the mess that was this city.

Ponies walked past in their own little worlds, each the center of their own universe. The mere thought that they did not matter the least, never passing their minds instead they were content in the lie.

But when given the choice of despair or a dream, who's to say anypony would choose different? He was given that choice so long ago, now among the lost masses he knew that despair was the correct one. This way you could never be broken, you could never have the dream molded into a nightmare.

“More coffee hon?” A slender mare of a grey coat asked in a messy Hooflyn accent, her eyes tired from the days of regret and hard work. Golden mane a tangled mess, her whole life built upon serving others.

“Never again, don’t quit your day job.” I gave a stern sneer, eyes locking on her own so she would know I was being honest.

“Bastid!” Her tone became a hiss as I walked away, vanishing among the waves of broken dreams never to be seen again.

This was why I didn’t care for the city, why I prefered the silence of the countryside. Away from the false dreams of the world, alone with my thoughts and a pen. The only true way an author can get any work complete, if not for her then I’d never even visit a place so vile like Manehattan.

“You look like a sad potato.” A shrill yet bubbly voice broke my train of thought, eyes gazing down to an odd sight to say the least.

A slender pastel pink hippogriff stood prominently in front of me, gazing up towards me with large sparkling violet hues. Hair a mix of light blue and snow white colors, she was indeed a mess of a creature to say the least.

“Who…”

“Silverstream, I’m visiting Manehattan as part of a project for Ms.Rarity!” The bubbly mess burst out into high pitched giggles excitedly.

“Whatever! Why would you desire to bug me?” I snapped back in reply, the crowds of ponies pushing past us at a hasty pace.

“I dunno, I looked over and just saw you...” Her tiny claw pointed to an empty bench across the street, her ears folding down softly.

“Well you were wrong kid!” I gave an roll of the eye and pushed past her roughly, trotting on my way as my thoughts began to drift back.

“I could be, but don’t think I am. My mom always told me I had a good eye for reading creatures, I was like surprised because creatures didn’t have pages like tomes and…” Silver quickly bit her tongue, my eyes casting her a dark devious gaze.

“Begone!” I gave a dark tone of voice, a sudden chill of ice caressing over us both.

“Wow! That was like super scary, you do any acting?” The child exploded out into a fit of giggles, my mind growing numb from such a bright annoyance.

“Look I’m busy, so what is it you want kid?” I decided to cut to the chase, If I could pay off this weirdo with a few bits I’d jump at the chance.

“Hmmm, how about a smile?” She giggled with delight, her tiny claws clapping together as bright eyes locked upon me.

“I don’t smile.” I spoke coldly with a furrowed brow.

“All things smile, well if they have a soul at least...you see my aunt…” I gave a glare to the child, holding up my hoof to silence the noise before it could begin.

“Just leave!” I sped off at a large gallop, hooves smashing against the sidewalk as I placed a true mile between us before slowing down.

“That was fast.” Silver spoke sitting on a new bench happily, her face beaming with a childish grin.

“How?”

“Duh!” Her claw pointed to her wings proudly.

“Grrr!” I felt a loud annoyed growl escape my throat.

“My aunt told me that none of us are lost, we are all being guided by our heart.”

“I don’t care, I don’t have a path or a place to be! I just want to be left alone, far away from creatures like you!” I allowed my horn to spring to life, magic lifting the annoyance off her seat and roughly pushing her away.

“...”

“So stop annoying me and just go to Tartarus!” My hoof smashed atop the ground, a loud echo wafting across the sky as the small child weakly look down.

“I’d feel awful if I didn’t say anything, if something then happened…”

“What!?”

“May I have just five minutes? After that I’ll just go…”

“Five?”

“Mmhmm.”

“Go ahead.”

“You’re not smiling because you’re dying.” Her chipper tone became softer, just like her’s.

“What?” I gave a narrowed glare to this creature, unsure what she was getting at.

“It’s ok though, I was just as shocked when I spotted you. As you were when you spotted me.” Her tiny claw softly embraced my hoof, the world around us growing silent once more.

“You are living your life alone, as if under an ocean and below the waves.”

“...”

“Drowning in the dark vast waters, with not a soul to show you a guiding light.” She gave a small shrug spinning around, her eyes lifting up into the sky sadly.

“You talk, you walk and live, but never do you feel as if they are close.”

“Until?” I felt the words creep out of my muzzle slowly, lifted upon the breeze of the chill city streets.

“Until that day when you had enough comes, you feel a weight lifted as you see the end is near. Heart racing and palms sweaty, you ready yourself to fade away only to…”

She paused swallowing a large lump in her throat, whole body shivering in place before taking steps ahead to catch her breath. My hooves following her close, eyes transfixed upon her delicate frame.

“To notice that if life is full of pain, despair and heartache, then why would death not be the same?” She spun around to face me in silence, her tiny claws pulling back the coat from my neck.

The bright red rope burn still visible from this morning, imprinted into my flesh as if a badge of shame. The mind willing to let go, yet the body fearful of its end. Tears softly trailing down her cheeks, those sparkling eyes filled with a somber pain.

“When I saw you, I could see me…”

“That is life, you can’t force it to have a greater meaning.” I gave a loud scoff, pushing her claw down ever so gently.

“I agree, but what if it did so willingly!?” The creature suddenly sprung back to life quivering, her tiny claws digging deep into my shoulders with excitement.

“You and I, we are and were ‘Task Masters’! Creatures born to force rules upon a world with no rules, creatures in search of a magic we thought didn’t exist!”

“It doesn’t!” I snapped back with a spike of somber hate, her body shivering in joy yet the eyes sobbing with fear.

“But what if you just put away the dark thoughts, what if you said NO!- To all the Hate, Despair, Pain and Loneliness!” Her claws pointing to her side, the building we were standing before one I knew all too well.

The building of my sister, the only pony I felt ever could shine a beam of joy among the darkness. How without even trying, did I end up on this doorstep within the massive city?

“What if just for a while, you simply let the universe take control. For just a while, we all just enjoy ‘The Here, For Now.’.” Silver simply nodded in place, embracing my numb cold body with a warming hug.

“Did your heart guide you to a place, you needed to be?” She whispered into my ear tenderly, as soon as she had arrived in my life, she spread wings fluttering into the sky and vanishing.

The wind blew across my inky dark mane, my eyes lifting towards the old wooden door of my sister's 'Wordy Whispers'. I felt my hooves drag across the cement walkway, up the stairs and into the bright light of a home. Knocking upon the door with a gentle force, the frame swinging open as she stood before me smiling.

“Brother, I didn’t expect a visit today!?” That melodic tone, filling the bleak abyss with a cherished song.

“My heart guided me here…”

“That’s wonderful, it knows you’re not alone.”

For the first time in a long while, I could feel myself genuinely smile.