Well, here we are (FINALLY).

Oh and this will be in third person; if you guys like it a lot, let me know and I'll keep it like such. One last thing: if you guys get the reference in the chapter, let me know. I love seeing people figure it out.

Enjoy!

"... and here we have one of the most exquisite of royal treasures, the Royal Garden. This garden has been maintained with peace and success for many a century. Only the highest of our ranks have seen this, as it is a prized monument to our citizens and our castle." Luna spoke with a level dignity and pride not seen in her since James had been here.

Jesus Christ in heaven give me a damn break! He thought to himself as he sat down on the ground, barely noticing the scenery at all. James was by no means as fit and in-shape as the guards and all the running around had certain caught up with him.

"I-I'm just gonna- that was really- like wow I'm- FUCK." He hissed and threw his shirt off, tossing it in her direction, only to miss by about four feet.

This incited a laugh from the princess, throwing her head back and looking at him, stifling laughter to the point of bursting into another fit again. It was all very regal and very annoying to the most-tired James.

"Yeah yeah, laugh all you want. Humans are not meant to run for that long. Jeez how do you guys do it?"

"Oh, we have a lot of sex, its really a very good workout." She smirked while her expression failed to conceal her need to laugh at James' face. He was clearly caught off guard; his brows agreed to this conclusion.

"Eh? What the hell...?" He spoke to himself as she doubled over laughing again and fell on her back, kicking wildly to rid her self of the pain in her gut from laughing so hard. James stood up and walked over to her and pointed a finger at her.

"Hey I'll have you know right goddamn now if I wanted to fuck someone here I'd damn well do it and no one would could say no. Hell I could probably have any stallion I wanted, so don't think because your a princess you can get away with that shit, you feel?" James was still breathing heavily and his chest reflected that.

The look from Luna was one of confusion and lust with what James would describe as fear.

Luna gave him naught but a huff that he concluded was one of... need, for lack of a better word. Perhaps I'm walking down the wrong road. Better stop while I'm ahead.

"Oh, and just how would you go about this "fuck", as you say?" She asked in a very benign, very trained tone.

It was both odd and hot to hear the princess say that, at least to James. I'm going to need to get Cadance to say that.

NO. STOP THINKING LIKE THAT JAMES.

Screw you, a man can dream.

"Uhh... that's more of a... private subject, Luna. And considering my position, I'd rather not go there just yet." He held his hands up in defense. You said "yet" you fuckwit. Now you're doomed.

"Well... perhaps you're right," She said after walking to him and trailing around him, her tail brushing him the entire time while he stood and rolled his eyes, "... a mare can wait." She whispered just loud enough for him to hear as he visible stiffened at the comment and with cheeks as red as the roses, stared at her angrily.

This served only to make him more annoyed, which gave her cause to laugh.

"Oh my, dear James, you are such fun to tease! Where have you been all this time?"

"Hell, I don't know. I'm just glad I'm here I guess." He got over his embarrassment and quipped the comment with a smile adorn brightly.

"I uhh... most people back in my world aren't very nice, to put it generously. You guys are pretty great, not gonna lie. I've grown quite fond of you all in the short amount of time I've known you." He smiled. He was telling the truth but at the same tie lying. He's seen them before and he knows them quite well, but interacting with them personally as an experience is something he is wholly alone in.

"Well. Those were very kind words, James. Thank you for that, I shall pass that on to my friends, hm?"

"Oh by all means, if you guys want to talk about me, feel free. I'm basically the only one of my kind here, guess its kinda hard not to talk about me..." Which before I came here never happened.

"Indeed, James, you are but the only one of your kind as you say who have arrived here after the disappearances." Her voice and expression turned cold at the later half of the statement, as if she was remembering.

"Disappearances? What do you mean? Is that why humans aren't around?"

His words only earned him a nod. What did she mean by "disappearances"?... I mean, its not out of the realm of possibility, right?

He pondered these words. He'd have to go to the royal archives to maybe get answers. He just had to. This was not something he could easily let go, and even through his conversations with Luna, they remained in his head. If there was a chance he could find out what happened, he was going to take it no matter the cost.

"James? Jaaaames?" Luna called to him, earning her a non-committed look and a simple, one word reply: "Yes?"

"Is something on your mind, James? You're quite preoccupied in that small head of yours."

"Yeah, I've been trying-"

She began to laugh when he deadpanned at her, only increasing her humorous findings in the matter.

"Damn woman, you're just mean. That's just downright mean." He pouted to her and followed along with her by his own chuckling, "Yeah, you got me there, Luna. I didn't even catch that until after... oof, I'm getting slow."

"Are you a quick witted lad or a thinker?"

"Mostly the aforementioned. I'm pretty quick on my feet when not distracted... maybe that means I'm just crap at this." He chucked, earning a humorous shake of Luna's head to his comment.

"We will get you straightened out right quick. You'll be back on your mind's feet in no time... speaking of time," She looked towards the entrance, "We have a meeting to attend and some paperwork to be done so we must be going. I trust you can find your way back?"

"Yeah! No problem. Thanks for the tour, Luna. It was really helpful!" He smiled widely and gave her a thumbs up as she trotted away.

"And the laughs, I'll be practicing, you know! Stay sharp!" He yelled to her as she was almost out of sight.

"We shall!" She called back and disappeared...

...

"Wait, where do I go again? Ah shit. Here we go again." He looked back and jogged to the hallway where, at least he thought Luna would be, but she's no where to be found.

No guards? That's a shame... come to think of it, I've not seen a single guard... a holiday, perhaps? He pondered this point for a little while, slowly shuffling down the castle hallways. He'd not remembered a single word from Luna describing how to get back and to this he felt akin to the village idiot.

It was when he began to walk down one of the hallways with a large, stained glass mosaic of Celestia and Luna, did he slowly begin to recognize where he was. "Dayyyum." He remarked aloud to the glass windows. They were above and beyond anything he's seen in his lifetime.

In fact, he'd not seen a castle at all in his lifetime. To this knowledge, he took to studying his surroundings. "Mein Gott, das ist erstaunlich..." He told himself as he began to feel the walls, not a single bump, crack, or chip in any of the surfaces he could find or touch.

It reminded him of how well kept his father's place was. Cold, calculated, smooth and unchanging.

He didn't like it one bit. Not at all.

During his concentration in thought, a certain character had snuck up to him in the meantime, not making a sound. Grabbing his shoulders softly, the voice addressed him:

"You look a little lost, James."

James didn't move or jump from this, he merely was taken aback from his musings about the castle and craned to look over his shoulder to see a familiar pink Alicorn standing behind him.

"Oh, Cadance! I didn't even see or hear you. Wow you're pretty stealthy."

"I can be when I want to be." She smiled to him, sighing heavily after. What was that supposed to mean? These ponies I swear...

"You seem a little... exhausted. How'd the meeting go?" He asked, preparing for an answer he predicted.

"It was boring but somehow tiring. Its like the boredom sucks the life out of you aaaaaaand leaves you sluggish."

"Oh so like jet lag." He quipped and nodded.

"Jet lag? What even is such a thing?"

Ahhh that's right, these ponies don't have jets... what a shame.

"Well, to put it in layman's terms, its basically a term used to describe a feeling of sluggishness or how someone feels like their schedule has been changed or the time has flown by, ect., ect."

"I see... odd term."

"Yeah, I've never seen the relevance in it except when I get off from a flight and understand it firsthand..." He shrugged, the last part of his comment earning an interested look from the Alicorn.

"Flight? You humans can fly? You never told me!" She playfully hit his shoulder and began flying around, much to James' amusement.

"Not organically, no. We can't fly like you guys can... although we can fly using other means. Like planes, or sub-orbital rockets, and occasionally just yeeting someone off a building." He answered matter-of-fact like.

"You guys use machines to fly? How in the world is that possible?" Her expression she gave off was what James thought would be one he would get if he tried to explain technology to these ponies.

"Well, we don't have any magic at all. None. So, in the case of having no magic, we've nothing to turn to but technology and its inventions. Some days we wish we could have magic, though... we all do." He shrugged and hung his head, hating coming to terms with his ultimate deficiency in magic.

"And I was so hoping to use magic, too. I figured it'd be pretty damn cool moving stuff around like nothing at all, turning invisible and stuff."

"Well, perhaps that is something we can do together, hm?"

This question gave James a smile. At this point, he'd love to spend more time with her. This begged another question from James:

"What would we do, exactly?"

"Simple, James: I will teach you how to use magic." She smiled, giving his heart a chance to skip a beat.

"Wa-wa-wait y-you mean I still have a chance?" He began to quiver slightly in nervousness; eyes lighting up with a passion behind them that Cadance hoped she would see in many ways.

"Yes, James. Everypony has a chance to learn and use magic. Some are born with great potential, some must work for it... it any instance, everypony can use magic. So can you." She smiled with a finality that gave him exactly the answer he was hoping for.

"Yes!" He fist pumped victoriously, excitement radiating from him. With this, he rushed to Cadance and wrapped his arms around her tightly, giving many thanks to her.

"There is nothing to be thankful for yet, James. We've still to practice, hm?"

"Ah, yes. You're right." He took two steps back, nodding as he did so to her reply, "This'll give us a chance to do something together, like you said..." He looked into her eyes, holding his gaze there drawing a flush on his face.

"God I'm so green sometimes." He rubbed his neck and chuckled nervously, looking away while Cadance merely gave a girly giggle.

"Wellll... after you get to know me, you won't be." An innocent but slightly sultry reply came his way as his eyes reverted back to her.

"Aren't you the princess of-"

"Love, yes. The Princess of Love." Her look gave off a feeling of fulling committing to the sensual side of herself, lidding her eyes halfway for him while she made her way over.

"And I know all about loving, darling." Whispering into his ear, his face grew red.

Boner alert! He though to himself instantly as Cadance laughed softly.

"You're in for one wild ride, James."

He mumbled something that Cadance could only barely hear, "What was that?"

"Or maybe you're in store for a wild ride." His voice carried weight when he spoke since at this point he had given his voice a chance to chance to a deeper, rougher, sexier voice. Luna had already poked her fun at him merely as a joke, but he wasn't anticipating Cadance's seriousness on the subject.

"Oh yeah, James?"

"Yeah." He furrowed his brows with a boyish grin on his face. To this, she leaned into his ear again:

"Why don't we just find the nearest room and I'll show you just how good it feels to be out of those clothes? Or perhaps, you want to just breed me right here?" Her lips remained unmoving as her gaze drifted to his.

The two remained like this for a few long moments before James made his move, tilting his head and kissing her softly while holding her head under her chin, eliciting a small moan from the both of them. He quickly pulled away, looking into her eyes:

"Not quite yet, princess. I've still yet to know you more personally, eh? That is, if you can handle the tension." He smirked again.

"Is that even a question?" Cadance retorted back with the same kind of shit-eating grin he gave her not a moment before.

"Indeed. I know you can handle it." The man smiled genuinely to her. He then began looking into the distance deeply (which happened to be the floor); lost in thought.

"Heyyy... wait a minute. I know this is random but I have a question to ask," James quipped, earning a nod in response, ", you seemed to know what I was when I first met you..."

"... what kind of knowledge does Equestria have on humans and Humanity? I'd love to see what you've got. Honestly I've been wondering about that but I keep forgetting to ask and so I was just thinking that if I read what you guys know about humanity I could maybe help you to understand us as a species and while it is a small possibility there might be humans here in Equestria or at least in the surrounding countries which I think would be awesome as I could ask them-"

"JAMES!" The mare screamed at him quickly, earning a jolt from him. She motioned to him to follow her down the halls towards the Royal Library, but he didn't know that.

...

"James calm down I know you want to know more about us but let me answer: the Library has most of the answers you seek. Celestia and Luna have the rest. That's all I can tell you so far; all I know about humans is their physical appearance and the fact that the country they used to reside in is no longer anything but a wasteland. Going to the Library and asking Twilight about it may help; she knows what you're looking for."

A few moments passed before a friendly voice popped up:

"Did somepony say books?!" A purple mare trotted around the corner and smiled at the two of them.

"Oh Twilight, I was just about to send somepony to look for you. Just in time! James was wanting some knowledge of pre-war humans."

"Uh-say what?" James scratched his head before being yanked (literally) by Twilight herself towards the direction of the library. The Princess followed and smiled.

"I know that we'd love nothing more than to spend more time together but I almost forgot that I have a mare's date with some of my friends in about an hour... oops."

"So you're not coming with? Darn. Well, I can understand forgetting things. That's like one of my super powers." He chuckled before continuing, "So where are you going?"

"Just to my chambers to freshen up; its right here. I will see you later on tonight, yes?" She inquired while opening the door, pausing to receive her answer:

"Well, I certainly hope so; you know where to find me!" He yelled and waved to her as he and Twilight made their way to the library...

... "Aaaaand this is where we keep our books on the history of Canterlot, this is-"

"Twilight." James, looking ragged already, croaked out her name in protest.

He shook his head and rubbed his face for a moment, "Is it still Friday?"

Twilight deadpanned at him something fierce before rolling her eyes. "Its not that bad, James, we've only been here... oh its been almost a half and hour. Wow I didn't know time flew that fast."

"Or crept so slooooowwww like JAYZUS MAN. Where be the human stuffs?" He motioned to the enormous library. It was very large and easily rivaled that of the Library of Congress that he saw once back in D.C..

"The knowledge on humanity and all their former glory is right here. Subsection 2, Category C."

"Nice... thanks... basically everything on this level of the bookcase?"

"No, the entire bookcase. All 78 books." She replied proudly, as if she's read every one of them (she has, probably).

James facepalmed quite hard at this. Hopefully he could figure out something that didn't involve dying at the library over some books; Lord knows he would die of boredom before Death's own schedule.

"Alright. Let's narrow it down a bit. What books do I need to read about the history of Equestria's dealings with humanity? What were they like before the 'war' or whatever Cadance meant by that?"

"That would be these books," she pointed to the lower section, about 15 or so books. Many of these were very, very old, ", most of these books are drawings of schematics for machines of war; only a few of these tell about the story of pre-war humanity."

"Where can I find more of the history after I get done reading this?" He asked, already not content with the limited information that was available to him.

"Well... there is one pony, actually two, but really just one pony that can help you." She pondered before replying.

James motioned her to continue.

"Princess Celestia. She wasn't there, but her mother and father were. Maybe you can talk to her about that sometime?"

"Absolutely. Thanks for taking me here and putting up with me." He gave her a thumbs up and thanked her for her kindness (and thoroughness).

"Oh don't worry about it. I love getting people interested in books. A special kind of satisfaction to see someone reading diligently. If you need me, I'll be in the magic spells part of the library, down on the other end. Talk to me if you need me!" She smiled and walked away, waving at him encouraging him to do the same.

"Alright. Now, lets see what we've got here..."

James began flipping through the old pages, skimming over the table of contents. He was not about to find much, but he did find one page, a small excerpt from an unknown source, that did prove useful as well as absolutely terrifying:

Long ago, humans were a thing of legend, spoken with a token fear and awe.

Long ago, they arrived. From where, nopony knows. Some think from beyond our borders from the great unknown, and some say from the heavens themselves.

They flourished, not with magic and friendship, but with technology and steel, great inventions and machines of war. It was then when a spy from their world, sent into Equestria was captured, bringing war to the humans from the heart of Equestria.

On May 7th, 1544, the "Fateful Appointment Day".

But they were no match for magic, as it was the wielder of elements. And so, the humans were destroyed, save for few that managed to escape. Nopony really knows where the surviving humans went; those that were captured were soon sent into slavery, some killed, some exiled.

-Unknown

...

"What the hell? What was that?" James questioned aloud as he scratched his head. Who the hell wrote this? Is this some kind of combat diary?" He wondered. He immediately put the book down and grabbed a random book that Twilight pointed out, and was met by theoretical schematics for machines and drawings. One he saw peaked his interest:

United Earth Federation

--Schematic for UEF Armored Command Unit--

Specifcations:

Height: 90 meters
Width: 32 meters
Depth: 12 meters

Weight without upgrade packages: 97 tons
Weight with upgrade packages: 100-117 tons

Description:

The Armored Command Unit or ACU, is the state-of-the-art war machine designed to encapsulate a human operator, giving that operator immense firepower, adaptive mobility, defense and the latest build capabilities and schematics to the commander. The ACU has a built in teleporter, allowing it to be anywhere on the battlefield given it has time to charge.

The Armored Command Unit is the fulcrum to any operation; its death results in immediate defeat.

There were many other schematics in that same book, as well as many others. They were all different in one way or another but this left James with one answer: they all had one thing in common, and it was the fact that they were all war machines.

"How odd. I wonder what humanity was so obsessed with war for... Kind of like our old history of endless fighting but imagine one or two thousand years in the future.

"Mein Gott." He shook his head and sat down. He made the decision to ask Celestia about this as soon as it was convenient; he had to have answers.

"James?" He heard Cadance's voice call from afar.

"Answers can wait; for now, its time to spend some time with the lady." He said to himself and straightened himself up. Walking towards her and waving, he smiled. But, behind that smile there was worry and confusion; what happened to his fellow humans and where are they now?

He could only hope it wasn't as bad as he thought.

Author's Note

Hello hello again! You've made it to the end of the chapter. Did you like it or hate it? Let me know; I love reading you guys' comments.

I hope you guys found the reference... it was fun to write; as was the chapter. See you next time!

-Joss