Friendship is Optimal: Wraith’s Brand

After a short walk, we arrive at a cave. Nova draws a dagger with his hoof, and looks towards us two, “You two take the main chamber, I got the back one. You’ll face the mage and some goblins, and I will stop more goblin reinforcements from coming in.”

I nod as he moves into the cave. I look toward Ascension as he holds his bow in one wing, and his string in the other. I nod, and draw my sword with my hooves. Don’t ask how, it’s a game. I look towards him, “You ready?”

He nods, and looks forward, “They don’t stand a chance.”

I move into the caverns, looking at the enemies surrounding me. Now, I’m no expert on fighting, I know next to nothing about actual sword fighting. But I am a expert at games, and this is just a different control scheme. Just gonna have to warm up with it. I look around, seeing all the goblins, “Come on then! Olly, olly, oxen free!”

This seems to get them riled up, and they all start to charge. No armor, only rusty daggers. Easy. I swing my sword at one approaching, and cut it down with ease. One swings, but I rotate my sword around to take off its arm before it can connect. Once it’s arm is gone, I chop off it’s head, and roll out of the now crowd of them.

I stand upright, and look back at the horde. I see a unicorn mage in the back trying to organize them. At least, until the thwack of a bow sounds out, and he collapses with an arrow through his head. The goblins panic at the sight of their dead leader, and start to scatter.

I rush back in, and swing my sword at anything that’s green and moving. Decapitation here, making them into fractions over there, impalements elsewhere. Headshots, and headchops as the low level vermin panic. Eventually, there is just one. Crawling up a wall in an attempt to get away from us.

I take out the Siberian Hammer, and throw it at the creature. The hammer hits a bit to the right, but the explosion of ice still catches the goblin. It freezes, and drops off the wall. Shattering on the ground.

I put my sword away, and smirk, “Bit rusty. Gonna have to get used to this systems controls.”

Ascension walks up to me, “This is so realistic, I don’t think there is a control system.”

I shake my head, “It’s still a game, even if realistic. Every game has a control system, I just have to figure it out.”

He shrugs, “So, should we go find Nova?”

I nod, “Yeah, he might need some help.”

We both walk through a tunnel into the back chamber. There, we find Nova, stabbing a goblin with his dagger, and surrounded by fifty dead goblins. After a final stab into it’s neck, he takes it out and wipes the blood off on it’s skin. He looks up as he notices us, “Oh, your finally done.”

I gape at the dead he’s surrounded by, “How?”

He puts the dagger back into its holder, “A question I am not legally allowed to answer until Putin is dead. I think the poison was supposed to trigger this year, but I can’t remember.”

I shake my head, “I’m almost afraid to ask what why. But, why?”

He slightly smiles, “Me and Putin were comrades of the same type, and he had a specific year he wanted to live to. So, I granted his request. And that is all the great Union of Soviet Socialist Republics would allow me to say.”

I sigh, “KGB?”

“I can only answer that on one condition.” He points at Ascension, “CIA?”

He looks around nervously, “Oh, um, well... no?”

Nova looks back at me, “Then it’s a no from me.”

I rub my head with my hoof, “Okay, what the hell? You know what, no. I don’t even want to know. Let’s just move on.”

Nova nods, “Gladly.”

Ascension also nods, “Yeah, let’s do that.”